Circumcised at 6 and the Pooping Houdini

Hey, we had a few comments about your swearing in the last episode.

Did you see that I haven't seen that? Is it our ageous?

Yeah? It's huge, like canashtop swearing?

Seriously, what buck off?

I'm just joking. Welcome back to Two Dads. I am Mattie Jay and I'm as. This is a podcast that is all about parenting, the good, the bad, and relatable. And look, if there are any new listeners right now have just tuned in. Maybe they've seen our faces on the artwork of the podcast and thought, hey, they look like they could offer some advice. I think if you come here for advice, it'd be like someone entering a chili eating contests.

Actually, that's a lie. Someone took my advice the other day. They even sent me a message to say I forgot to tell you.

Actually, now, look at the smile on your face.

I'm an expert. Which part don't talk in the middle of the night. Did you see that I have been a message?

I think I saw a message from.

A ready my dam.

From a mum.

Yeah, yeah, she was like genius, didn't even think about it. So like, why do you need to talk in the middle of night? You don't need to talk. If she goes, can you get me some water?

Just do it? Just there is the odd look. You know. Obviously we like to talk ourselves down too much. Because there are a lot of other podcasts out there that.

Do offer gen we don't focus on it.

No, if there is advice, it's purely accidental.

Absolutely, that was an accident. That was me kind of being like that what worked for me could work for you. But I also I just don't want to see people getting in an argument in the middle of the night, especially if they are your neighbors, thinking your neighbors.

If there's one thing that we can do, Ash, I hope we can do, it's just bring couples together and try and minimize any arguments that they have around the kids.

And build some normality before we start.

Yes, it would be remiss of us not to crack a little bit.

Yeah. Absolutely, what have we got today?

Well, this is something different.

I've had this before, you've had I had a couple last night, Ash at all.

Oh Yeah, cheers your ginger beer people.

Of the equipment, because that's expensive.

Better be a ginger beer, Ash, fact, if I may, this has half the sugar of other ginger beers out there that are alcoholic.

All right, and like you know me, I'm a beer guy all the all the day long. I couldn't get that out. I'm a big guy through and through. I don't drink any spirits rarely unless I'm absolutely hammered.

What made you go for the ginger beer yesterday? Oh?

I thought, like, I haven't had a chance to try it yet. We're going to talk about it today real quick, and I thought, you know what, I'm gonna have six of them. So I had a few of them last year and I quite like them. They're definitely in the rotation.

Normally i'd have this on a summer afternoon. Winter still quite nice.

Winter's got a gingery beer feel about it too.

It's kind of like I think if you're in the UK, like mulled wine. Yeah, yeah, it is big and the Australian equivalent ginger beer.

Do you know what I did? It was late yester afternoon. I had the kids. I locked them in the trampoline out there as you do perfect ziparp, but I put a padlock with man. Just went out there and just watched them UFC wrestle out there and did.

They want to be in the trampoline or were you like, get in there now, oscar.

Well it was pretty dark and cold by the time I got.

Dad. Please anyway, twelve Ginger Beer being like you guys having fun.

Yeah, they're good, So thank you again, Better Beer for the Ginger Beer, lower Sugar get in India.

Can I ask just really quickly before we get into the episode. We joked the other week about April's reaction to Better Be here being a sponsor.

Yeah, like, obviously she doesn't know yet. No, look it's fine. Yeah, Look, it wasn't the first choice. But where that's right? Now she's up, she's working.

So this is not easy working, Like this podcast business is hard work.

It's tough. Choose again, half empty. I wanted to just quickly touch on something really quickly. You know, I've had a rough week so far already Wednesday. But it's been a rough week, a rough trot. As some would say, We can't.

Go into detail, can we? No, No, because they'll be listening.

Potentially they'll be listening and that would end really badly. But same time, but something worse happened, something more embarrassing happened. Yesterday I was down the shops, just picked up a few things as you do. You know what we're picking up just condon.

Want definitely not you just like groceries. Grocery.

Yeah, I just had to get you know, the usual stuff like eggs, ship whatever, that sort of stuff. And I've got a few things from Woolie's. I've got a few things that weren't on the list. Okay, and you know I love their brown paper bags. I just feel like an elegant man walking out with the brown paper bag. I don't know, I don't know something about it.

What do you mean?

They're just nice, They're just nice to carry. The nice and square things fit in there nicely. I'm not rummaged around with a plastic fucking suitcase.

Yeah I can't. I kind of get what you're saying. But at the same time, I prefer the plastic one, like the hard plastic, because they're more robust, like if you're carrying milk and stuff.

I didn't have any others, and I don't have any linen bags.

Although no products that were like letting out no more.

I stupidly overfilled them. Okay, now we think you know where this is going. Yes, I was walking out to the car and it just so happened to be school knockoff time as a school across the street. Yep, and they're all hall and these teenagers and you know what teenagers are like, they're fucked. They're absolute assholes.

Took the words right out of my mouth.

Both bags snap right in front of all these school kids, and it was just like, it's such an ick.

It's like that scene from Home Alone where he's got the brown paper bags and they just bottom out.

Will happen, and it's like such an ick. If you see someone, it's like, there's two things that I think that's similar. There's picking up your groceries off the off the floor of the car park or ground of the car park. Yeah, that's bottom feeder, that's bottom feed And also chasing a plastic bag that's in the wind. Weird little run after a plastic bag that's called the wind.

It's just always out of reach. Did you lose the eggs?

No, they were on top, so like safe landing, Thank heavens, Thank heavens. But look I was red faced.

Did you get a reaction from the kids, Oh yeah, it was what are you staring at? I was just like, get out of here, picking up your condoms.

It seems ash buy his home Brown. I wanted to talk about Macy. Yes, so Lola's what two? Macy's coming up to two? Lola's potty training as we worked out last week, would you smite it all over the fucking wall. Macy's almost almost too.

She's like six months out, how far.

Month in June? Five months five months out, say five months out, So she's not potty training. She's still in very much in nappies, diapers, whatever people's preferences on that. And she's doing this thing now where she just disappears and goes quiet. So it's safe to say a couple of weeks ago, two weeks ago, it was just me and Macy in the house. Anyway, I've got distracted and I've lost Macey.

Hang on, wait, so you've lost her because we're in your house right now and.

I've lost her.

It's not really.

I was distracted. I was doing something.

What are you doing? Drinking?

No? Go on, man, sorry no, I was probably scrolling TikTok or taking a shit, and I was like, I was just she was up there playing or whatever, and then she's just gone quiet. I was like, I just gone quiet. So I went try and find her. Went into the bedroom, their bedroom, No one to be found. Nowhere to be found. Back into my bedroom. Checked the bathrooms as you do.

Am I losing my mind?

I thought, like, I'm fucking losing my mind. He checked the balconies, even the doors shut. She's grown three foot and reached the doors. I've come downstairs. Thought okay, she must be in the kitchen because she loves the snack cupboard is within reach for her. And I thought, gotta be there, got to be down there somewhere.

But she's also not at the age where like it's funny for kids when you're like where are you and they hide because it's like hide and seek. Yeah, she's not there yet.

Right now, she's like starting to know that it's Oh, it's a game.

If you're like here, she won't come. She won't come.

No, But this was like she just went quiet. I was like, fuck, Like where is she? I thought, because she can get up and down the stairs backwards thankfully, and I have downstairs. The doors are all shut. Going to the garage and not in the garage, open the front ship. At this point, I'm panicking.

At this time, right now, how long until April gets home.

A while.

See, Okay, so you're like, I'm panicking, but I would.

Have had enough time to go and steal another baby and come back with it.

But I was like, doesn't make any sense.

I was like, where's she gone anyway? So I was like, check back upstairs one more time. And I was like, walked upstairs, checked in their bedroom. Nothing. I was like, walk into our bedroom, and as I walked past our closet, I just a waft was emitting. A waft went up my nose. It happened to be shit.

Yes, so she's gone, you say, shit, Yeah.

She's gone. She's hidden in our cupboard. She's sitting on top of the shoe rack. It's the three to two or three story shoe rack, depending on how many levels you account, and she was on top of that, sitting there, silent. And what she's done. She's snuck off into our wardrobe and taking a shit. And I would have never have founder unless I walked past and smelt the waft of baby shit straight up my nostrils. And since then, she's

Like don't like, what are you doing?

So at the moment, it's kind of like a hide and go poosy situation.

It's weird that they go through that phase of wanting to have a bit of privacy, because they definitely come out of it like now my kids will just shit.

And then Laura's done the complete one eighty or three sixty where she's like she's like, I'm just shit rush.

But it's funny how they do that, don't you reckon? Like I remember Marley would sit down and squat behind the couch and just like just to have like a little bit of privacy. And I'd look over and she'd be like popping a vein from a forehead.

That look well, I told you about my friend that had the poo runner, remember, oh yeah yeah, And when he needs to pooh, he just takes off in like circles, like running and running and running, and he would just find a spot where no one's looking, like, I mean, they don't know any better. But like also, like I think Macy thinks it's some sort of game. Now if I know, I can't hear her for a little bit of time, am I smeller? Just getting a nappy out and the whips and I'm prepping.

It's a really annoying time as well when they start going onto solids and their poos go from being like a kind of like a purely breast milk or milk based poo to then transitioning to like having solids form that pool, and it's like the smellers I know.

And then also it was like can I check it? Why? What for?

Well?

You should know this. Apparently you can say a lot about the baby's health by their ship.

Obviously you don't want it to runny, but it comes.

It's just coming across a bit now, like if you want to check every poo, like, what is it your thing? Now?

But surely I'm doing it for a medical reason. Are you eating Macy's No?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no checking if she's healthy taste? Yeah, look, so hide and go pooh seek with Macy lately?

What's your trigger for when you guys will get to add a nappies during the day to start potty training?

Oh?

Look, is that an April question. I'll be on the spot.

I don't know, classic dad, do you know what? The other day as well, I was at the doctors with Macy because she needed a clearance to go back to Kindy or something. Anyway, went to just like the medical center down here really early, first in and the guy goes, who does she usually see?

Is it like the regular doctor?

I was like, I have no idea. He was like, is this your baby? I was like, yeah, let me just go them up a classic dad has no idea?

Did you have the blue books? I always going there like where's the blue book?

And I'm like, I thought the blue book for when you just when you just have them? I mean you could you got offer me baby journal?

Well apparently like I don't know when you stop.

Dad forgot and my GP's.

Name anyone who doesn't have kids. When you have a baby there then and there isn't it. They're like, here's your baby, and you get.

Baby comes out with it under a time, here's my blue book.

Sigh. You get like a little gift pack you get.

Like from New South Wales Healthy in this instance.

Yeah, you get a little tote bag and it has goodies can't remember what's in there. I think I know, I start, I stell a couple of blankets from the hospital.

Oh the stripy color there class, Yeah, we took one for the dog so the dog could get used to the smell before the baby came home.

Very good, very good. It didn't work, But within that, it is a blue book and that's meant to be you thing for like every it has like has it's like your car. Essentially also lose in my car as well.

Yeah, night man, I know, like I don't even know where it is, but April will be able to whip it out. Yeah, he keep it on me at all times. This is my one too. Anyway, that's maze at the moment.

A question, what is your bedtime?

I'm going to rinse me about my bedtime on this last night, I was in bed at seven point thirty. I'm essentially a toddler.

Okay, can you just just like really really top line, don't have to go to so much detail. What time did the kids go to bed? What's your schedule? Like?

Well, makes is usually in bed by like seven?

Okay, so dinner at six? What time?

I feel like you call me out? I had dinner last night.

At five o'clock.

I get so much shit about this from my friends because they're like.

Dinner at five is not even dark yet?

Yeah, wait till summer. It's definitely not like it's midday when we have dinner.

So you have dinner with the kids or it.

Varies depending on how hungry April is. Shit. But yeah, so like for example, last night last night, I had dinner at five quarter.

Past five wow. Wow.

Then bath macy the bed oscar to bed like bit after seven last night and daddy's lights out.

Are you asleep by seventeen?

No? No, no, no, I'm like sleep by like eight thirty. If you message me after eight, you're not getting respect. You've noticed, no totally. It says ash has do not disturb. And it's like three in the afternoon, I'm having a nap, man, I get a message from you are like twelve o'clocking like, yeah, good luck, champ, but you know you've noticed that you. I'll respond when I'm on the pier like okay, well I've got in for another few hours. Now let's have a business meeting real quick.

And so how does it work then with the kids, Like because obviously Macy's in a cot still yeah yeah, yeah, Oscar, what's he sleeping.

He's in a single bed with a he's in a cage. He's in a cage in the garage.

Is he able to leave his bed?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, and he does. He comes gets in.

With us on average, like every night.

It's an argument every time before we go to bed. You say, you stay in your bed all night.

And he's there thinking shut up.

Yeah yeah. So instead of now bribing him with things to staying there, I've decided to take things back to the shop. So, like, he's got this bike, hot Wheels bike who rides around the living room. I think it's outside of the moment. And he loves it, obviously he loves it. And the other night you're sleeping in your bed all nights And he's like nope, that's stupid face. And I was like, well you are, because otherwise I'm taking that fucking Hot Wheels thing and I'm taking it

Just putting the fear of God and yeah, you.

Know, but then he started doing this thing where he's like, I don't know, man, how do you how do you go? No, you didn't. It's like, tell me all about it. Because someone says to me, watch your nightmare last night. I'm just like, I did that thing where you're trying and punch someone and you can't do it. Are you trying to run after something and running backwards?

Marley had a nightmare and it was about the fact that she wanted some warm water in a bottle and the babysitter said no to her, and that was her nightmare. Oh my god, Yeah, the life of a toddler. It'd be sweet, wouldn't it. That's your biggest worry, that's your nightmare.

God, that'd be amazing. I'm having nightmares about having to wake up and go to work. Real problems, real problems, Marley, real.

Problem when I comes into bed. Are you guys like this is fine?

You try and look at that point, it's about sleep. Yeah, the punts is annoying because he just does that little half cry thing if you're not cuddling him, like.

They'll get ya and I get ya. Shut the I remember speaking to other parents about bedtime routines, and here it is, before I had kids, hearing a parent talk about like co sleeping, having their child in bed with them, and I remember thinking, what the fuck is wrong with you letting your child sleep in your bed, Like that's

Yeah, Look, we go through phases where he can sleep with us, and then we get him to go back. He's pretty good at going back. Like he'll come in at like three, four o'clock in the morning and there's no action having at three or four o'clock in at that point. A lot of time you just sneaks and you don't even know he's there, and I wake up and as a child's foot in my face.

Right. Yeah, because yeah, Marley, nowadays, like I would say, every single night.

If she's in there every night, Now, if.

I wake up in the morning and she's not there. Oh my god, this is weird. I don't even register now, Like she just slots in where the beds positioned. She'll come to me first because I'm like closest to the doorway, and it's almost like just you know, in my sleep, I just grab her and I put her in accept Except last night wasn't a smooth operation. We had a little incident in the bedroom.

Okay, you seem to be having instance in the bedroom all the time.

And this one's not like animals, This is not this is not sexually it's not sexulated. Unfortunately, I wish it was, which it would be. Yeah with my wife's Okay, So in the middle of the night Marley's obviously you know she's working up at like one or two o'clock, which is normally when she comes in. She's started walking towards the bed.

And punch her out like she was an intruder.

Well, I don't recall doing this. This is just me. This is me. I'm a protective kind of guy. You know, I'm looking up.

Oh you look real alpha. I can't imagine in the middle of the night. How yeah, I'll love to do what your pajamas the classes with a flap at the back. Real project you've got.

She's tried to like pull up the doubt and slot in, and I've in my sleep, I've had my instincts have kicked in, thinking someone's trying to like I don't know, it's like a dog trying to attack us, and so I've like grabbed her and like thrown her.

Oh my god.

And then I just I kind of like, I'm half asleep, but I hear this like.

You threw your child across the room, pushed on You just said you grabbed her and through it.

Yeah, but you make it sound so much more just.

Gathering evidence just in case, just for the testimony.

And obviously Marley starts bawling her eyes out. She's wailing, oh yeah. And I'm still going to half asleep. Takes me a while to get the engine running, and Laura is like, what the hell was that. I'm like, I don't know, rabid dog's broken into the house and I've just saved us.

Oh the floor she hit the floor.

Yeah, I threw onto the carpet. I was protecting the family. It's my instincts.

Social services up in you.

I was like, I'm sure it's not the.

First You're not the first parent to think any intruders in your.

Bed, Like sometimes it's scary.

Especially where you live like you once. At the end of the it's a bit sketchy. So I think it's fair play. Play on. So she's okay. Obviously she.

Was fine. No, yeah, she's like desiccated shoulder. She's ok No big deal.

Hope just eight weeks out.

I was secretly hoping that it might deter her from coming in the next night.

Did it well? Even half she ran in, She ran in like a hit up, comes in with shoulder pads. Karen Football starts up. That's how you get your kids to not sleep with you anymore?

Yes, crash tackle them to the ground.

This podcast is full of advice. I fly kick them to the head, straight to the head.

Problem solved, Cash, It is time to answer some questions which have been submitted by lovely listeners. We always go with two questions. I guess this part of the podcast is where you may there may be a peppering of advice.

Except for what we just talked about previously, where you've how to get your kids out of your bed.

Yeah, so I think if anyone does come for advice, normally you just skip through three quarters. Come here, you may get something. It's like if you're looking for gold and creek.

Yeah, you like you.

Comes at the end, you may get a sprinkling of gold dust.

Unlikely, it always the last place you look.

Definitely no nugget. Yeah, but this first question is an interesting one. This one popped up and we both went, oh, I won't say who it's from. Some people have said, we really like it that you didn't put our name in there.

Let's stick with that.

Let's run it will always make it anonymous, unless you say I want to call out, then well.

I don't want to get them in trouble or like, because we're.

All about keeping the peace between relationships.

Well, we started the episode with that, so I suppose a bit of finish with that.

Okay, we've got a question for you guys.

How did you go for you guys? For me? Is it for me?

Oh?

No? This is or.

Question for us guys coming from it's coming from a mum here. Okay, how did you go with sexy time during pregnancy? Were you into it? Or were you a little bit turned off? Slash freaked out? She kind of gives some context here she's with her second partner, she's pregnant with her third. She has two older boys with someone else, and she said that she's experienced this with

That's not that's the dream, I think. Look, unless you're hung like an absolute horse, you're not poking anyone in the head.

Champ, Well that's Mike cue to say that as a man with an enormous cock ash. It was a very big concern for me. Oh okay, I thought that mine is very long, very thin.

I've seen your budget smokers, mate, no grower, nothing to worry about. Look, it's definitely different.

Did you have more sexy time?

I think it was like pretty standard, Like I don't think a whole lot changed, but it's always also going to be like in how far along.

I was kind of into it. I kind of liked it.

Well, obviously the vision is getting ready for childbirth. Yes, so there is changes.

It's a bit more plump plump, which it's a good thing.

It's great, exactly right. Look it was, yeah, I would say for the first six months were still happening, and then I think as we got close to the end, she was just more uncomfortable.

Right, totally totally and like you can't you know.

I can't, Maneve, Yeah, you know, I'd be like, Laura, get up if you need a roller over. It's like one two three.

I asked Laura, I know, I said, like were you were you hornier?

And she was like, nah, I see, I was meant to ask it this morning and I forgot, But I'm going to say she wasn't. I'm going to say it, like I said, it was pretty normal for most of it.

But I kind of I don't know, like I kind of thought it was like being so I'm trying to find my words here, Laura being so womanly. I found that like a turn on.

I don't know what that means, the.

Fact that she was like mothering my credit. I don't know, sound sounds weird when I try and verbalize it.

Yea, I just found it, like the whole the whole.

Yeah, it's sexy, like she's you know.

Carrying my childe.

Yeah, all of that put together.

Okay, you just don't know. Some people, it could be their turn off, could be completely attractive to the look of what they're actually mounting. Otherwise it could be much more emotional, like yours sounds more emotional. So look, I think we obviously can't answer this question because we're just two people with no idea. Okay, So for me, like I said, it wasn't a turn on and it wasn't a turn off.

Did you though, towards the tail end of the pregnancy, you know, this is when my baby's very close to coming out. Did it ever enter your deliveries a quick, quick five minutes? I would, You know, sometimes in the middle of sex, I'd be like, holy shit, I'm about to become a dad sun And obviously that's not a thought that you want to have, as you're I didn't.

I didn't. I don't recall having that.

You didn't look at the belly and go that's going to be my child, not even.

Once, yeah, but not like during it. Sometimes I train on something else.

Man, So I would sometimes I'd be like, holy shit, that's going to be my daughter a right, and then I'd be like, oh.

God, no, I know what you mean. She was saying, he's just not that both just not been into It's probably just going to come down to the person. That's my answer to that question.

Long story short, sometimes during sex you do think of what is actually happening here, and there's a child in the room.

The longer process. Yes, all right, Matthew. So our second question today comes from one of our lovely listeners and it comes that's weird. Oh my god, I get through it. Just let me get okay. Question number two, Yes, yes, having your child circumcised? Are you for or against?

I think I'm for it.

I think I mean, don't give you that look your form. Mutilating a child's peenis that sounds about right?

Yeah, it's freak, it's cleaner, right. I heard the numbers have dropped off. I feel like not as many people are getting the snip for their kids.

Nah.

In the nineties, I was born in eighty seven. I think the nineties it was like all the rage. It was like fondu fondu un circumcision.

So my friend group is split up in between circumcised and uncircumcised, and it's always a consistent battle.

What do you mean as in like people like the circumcised. We all have a Sunday barbecue and the.

Unders making fun of the other one the party.

It's segregated personally.

I am uncircumcised and thankful because I need the length, And Oscar is also uncircumcised because I know he's also going to need the length.

Builthy animals, You are disgusting. I can smell parmes and cheese from here.

Okay, you're telling me that if you had a baby boy right now, you would cut the end of its dick off. What would you do? Wear it around your neck like a trophy?

Absolutely?

Freak huh girl. Dads would be like that too.

This has now become anyone listening who's circumcised. I think what you've done is an admirable thing. You are a clean individual, great hygiene.

There is this like bit of war though, like women have go do you prefer them circumcised? I think that's just your just blankt and assumptions. Get April down there, flop me cock out.

Okay. I was circumcised, not for religious reasons.

But because it was too big.

I wish it was too big. I had too much foreskin.

Had a five skin.

I had half cock half skin.

Oh really fifty to fifty Yeah, I was fifty.

So what happened was I was six at the time. Whoa, I was once one of you, and I thought.

It's yeah, so you're a trader.

So the age of six, I thought, well, this is now it's you know, obviously this point, I'm now going to grow up being uncircumcised. I was hanging out with the uncircumcised kids. I'd form my allegiances, and then all of a sudden, my mom, Yeah, she brought the boys together because I'm one of five kids, three boys, four boys in the family. So the issue was someone kept pissing everywhere, all over the toilet floor, it was everywhere.

I don't know, well, like a like an elephant's trunk when it's super excited living around.

Because I had so much foreskin, it would just like it would ruin the spray and it had come out like a oh my god, so much to that, and there would just be pissed everywhere, and I'd be like that was a good one, and then I'd leave my mom. My mom would come and being like, fuck.

Is this so you're telling me that your mom chopped the end of you, dick off because you didn't want to clean up the bathroom anymore in the kitchen and said I thought I was going to say, we got all the kids together and took a vote should be to.

Sacrifice of me on a Friday evening in the backyard in the goat, but my mom pulled me aside and she was like, hey, can I I think she must have been like, can I just have a quick look, and then she was like, fuck, he's got a big car. It's a lot of foreskin went to the doctor and wait to see your mum again.

I'm gonna yeah.

I mean, it must be sad for you recording in your house this time and my mom's not around.

I know, you just save this so I can't be like.

I went to the doctors and they were like, we got to get rid of it. It's too much on the young fella.

I don't believe this where I feel like you absolutely trying to pull one over.

I swear to god, I'm not trying to so then at the age of yeah, ages six, so I was grade one at a time and I had to then. You remember saying to the classroom. I was like, guys, I'm going into surgery. Wish me luck. It's booked for tomorrow. When I come out of it, I will no longer be the Maddy j that I was once before. And I remember waking up and the words that I was told by the doctor were very comforting, said surgery had gone well, and.

We added two extra inches because we felt sorry for that.

But I remember, it's weird how some things stick out in your mind, like your penis.

It's meant to do that.

My penis was bandaged up. It was like it was so girthy for the thought it was going to be hell yeah, I was like yes, but he made me go do a week to make sure that the bandages weren't covering, and it was all fine.

Was like a little target, like let's see how you get bull's eye, you good fellas.

This is a fucking serious story, and you're just there taking them. I think, being vulnerable and opening myself up. I think, no, this is true and so love this.

Did she keep it?

I don't think she did. I haven't. I can't confirmed.

I've got a phone number you can ask it.

I'm assuming that Mum decided not to keep my foreskin. There would have been so much of it because I had so much foreskin like a scarf. You could have like gone fucking sailing with that thing. Put it on a little tinny and you could have fucking sailed to Sydney. It's like Sidney to Hobart. Who's that it's the foreskin boat again?

Skin?

So yeah, So then from that moment on, I was then circumcised. So I'm the only one in my family of the kids.

Just the head of your paenis kept colduring winter.

Sometimes it does. I'm not gonna lie. Apparently we are less sensitive, so sex is more enjoyable for those who are uncircumcised. But I wouldn't know because I still come in like thirty seconds.

He's pretty enjoyable to me. I had a mate who actually, within the last ten years so in his twenties, had to get his get circumcised because the girth of his penis actually outgrew the skin and it became tight, so tight.

So he must have been just a massive grower or was it like as it was flaccid. It was still too big.

Yeah, like it was becoming really uncomfortable.

They just like not put like a snip in it to like.

Release the pressure.

They had to get rid of the whole thing.

How old was Well, the thing is he had a size. He had a size thirty four skins. You need to starze thirty two.

That would be such a good problem to have. So your penis are we big? Are we yay of? Are we nay? Look?

You're yay for circumcism? And there's no criticism from me because it's each to their own.

Yeah, I'm for it.

I have my allegiance with all of my friends are circumcised too.

That I should have asked this question a lot sooner. The fact that you're uncircumcised.

That's what that's why this works.

Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, freak.

I need the length, so I've got an.

Excuse so it doesn't bother me. It doesn't bother me, Okay. To be honest, it's one of those things that I'd say, Laura, what do you want to do?

It'll be up to her.

Yeah, that's a Laura.

Question to take one look at and go.

He needs all the length, Ash That is all we have time for anyone out there who's having some issues parenting. Maybe they have turned to the professionals, they haven't given them a reasonable answer. Come to us, say.

Getting If they go to professionals, they're getting an educated answer.

Yes, you want to count to that word.

Than someone who's educated doesn't have kids trying to give you advice. It's one who's uneducated and also has kids give you advice.

Yes, I think it's important if you are making any big life decisions with your children, you want to make sure you're getting answers from everybody, like family, friends, professional, medi j ash. That's that is why, that is why we're here. But you can submit any questions on Instagram at two Doting Dads, slip into our dms. We'll pick out the best ones. Keep it anonymous unless you want to shout.

Out yeah, yeah and look. If you enjoy today's episode, please go onto Apple Podcasts, leave a review, leave a star rating. Same with Spotify as well. Otherwise, if you just want to send us a message picture of your penis.

Send it.

If you've got a five skin right now.

If you're pregnant, send us a photo, give us. We'll be posting them all.

Thank you guys.

We've ended up recording right now, see you next Verses. Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.

We pay our respects to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres straight onto peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land