#144 Why Does Everything Hurt?

Got some exciting news.

All good.

You know those coffees that we ordered and they spilt?

He done it again.

I guess they got him for free victories.

Else can they reheat mart? It's cole.

I hope that doesn't go back to the delivery driver. And for the record, they were spilt. It was a quarter or less left.

It was like not even a small spill. It was a puddle of coffee. How did he make he nearly didn't make it here with that paper back? How did that? I don't know.

Did he say anything to you when he handed over the delivery? Yeah, he was like a quick welcome back to two doing dads. I happened to be Maddie Jay and I happened to be Ash and this happens to be a podcast all about parenting.

It is the good, it is the bad.

And if you come for advice, just like, for the love of God, stop for.

One hundred and forty second time, we do not give advice.

I don't know how many times do need to keep saying this.

I people were probably like, is this what's happened? Is this legal matter for real? Yes?

It is very serious. We can't take it on a scandal nokes out of the way.

This morning, I spooked Macie accidentally. I didn't line her up to spooker like I usually do.

I mean, do you see me scare Laura?

Oh yeah, I did see that.

Was it like that?

No, this was accidental.

For the record, got a lot of hate for scaring my pregnant wife. She was fine, she pissed herself, but.

Oh my god. Yeah, I can imagine like people be like features.

Venis was probably like, what's going on like that?

I remember when I worked in the timber once we had a possum in the roof and it got spooked so hard once so that had a miss.

Character spat out, what do you mean?

I don't know. It was like a fetus.

Don't tell me that. Sorry, stops scaring my wife.

Nah, you're right, she's a human. It's not possible. Don't know. Okay, So I spooked to Macy this morning, but it was a complete and utter accident. April had to take off to do a meeting. So I was with Macy this morning for an hour before I had to come here, and I was like, okay, I need to I wasn't ready for the day at all, so I needed to shit.

And as you how do you say ships leave my body?

Yes, aggressively, I would say, with a big, big, strong push. Anyway, I did that, and then I went into the shower, but I left the door open because Macy was just in the lounge room. I just wanted her to be able to access me if she needed anything.

Because it is good parenting.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, unless she walks in and slips over and it's bad parenting.

But she wait, was a toilet door open. She was like, what's that smell?

Nah? Nah, she's used to it, she used to it. How whole house things doesn't matter. And I'm in the shower as we go, and I stupidly put the the smoke detector in the hallway outside of the bathroom.

You've done this, yeah.

And all of and I didn't know, and all of a sudden, the smoke alarm's gone off and I'm like, he's.

Having a steamy one.

Yeah, And I was like, oh fuck, that's going to scare the ship out of Macy. And I like, come, I like turn the shower off and go out of the shower to like wave a towel in front of it. And by the time I come out of Macey's just like running up, ll do what is that? Just like fully spooked and I was just like smoke alarm. It was just like it's just going and she was like started to just get real real, what was your dog doing? Oh? She was hiding in the corner. She hates it too.

Anyway, she's every time he goes to bed, I'm watching.

Yeah, she's frantic in the hallway. I'm button aked in the hallway, waving my towel. My junk's probably flopping up.

He didn't have the trade's on the roof next door again it's.

Too wet for that, and I'm flopping around.

I'm waving amaze.

She's getting real worked up. And then it just stops and we both stopped and little other she was like she just looked at me and goes.

He just walks off.

And I was like a second ago, you were like the house is burning down?

Question? Yeah, does she ever look at your dick and dah, like what's that?

Like?

Are you how how.

It's more of like whoa. It's funny because she April, I mean April loves it. Mazie. She every morning she showers with ab when she gets home from the gym, was like I want to come and like gets in And then I had a shower the day and she came in and I was like her head is like perfect cock and ball heigh and I was like, okay, get out.

This is you're too old for this. Now there is high risk.

Yeah, this is high risk. And it was like it was Oscar. It's fine because he's like watch me. We and then you know, boys are very different.

But I'll never experience that.

Well do you do, I'll let you shower with Oscar.

Yeah she never really. I don't think she's about that. Yeah, yeah we can, she.

Does say, she did say. And it was really really funny her in O school, we're in a hammock up up when we're on the Gold Coast. My friend's gonna have it on the back and then they were in it together facing each other and like the feet were both out and Mazie goes, stop it. You're kicking me in the nuts.

And I was like, that is not right. Yes, I don't want to dob in which relative this is one of my nieces. I don't have that many, but she was ever recently looking after her and shat isn't it?

No?

And I was in the toilet and the door was kind of half a jar, and she was like just hands on the door and yeah, peeking in. And I was like, go on, I get shouts, come on in, breadon. So I was I was like, get out of here, come on, you don't want to see that. She was like can I see it? And I was like no, and I was like no, you you know that's my private part. So I had to express it's.

Like not that you go, I want to see the ship you just dropped off ash.

But if you ever had another child and terrible, sorry, this is this is Let's let's move on. Let's move right along.

Let's move a question for you actually, because school has gone back.

Yep.

It's term two, and our term two for our kids is the term two of their whole life. It's the first time has Marley received any assignments? Yeah, okay, at the.

Moment, she's really it's hard to get information from her.

Okay, I always go, what'd you learn?

She's she and also I picked her up and her teacher, who's so great, she's lovely. She was like, just a reminder that the task for this week is Then she explained the task and I was kind of in the like I was parked in a bad spot. That's another story. We're going to that later in the episode. But I had to just I wanted to grab and go, and she explained to me what I had to do and by when and I got in the car and I was like.

Fuck, crap. School's the losers driver.

So she has have homework. I think she has to write a story or no, she has to draw a picture of an animal.

M hmm.

That's as much as I know. Could start well then, but then just quickly, when I dropped her off this morning, she was like, where's my picture? And I was like what picture? She's like, the picture of the animal. She did it with Laura, and I was like, why are you asking me? It's your assignment and she's like, did you put it in my bag? And I was like, I don't know, probably not, you definitely didn't. It's fun. These kids are a nightmare.

It's attached to the fridge over there. Well, what have you got? Oscar had an oral presentation to do. Okay, yes, like a speech. Yeah, and it was due the first week of term, the first day back, pretty.

Much first day back. She had to do it with the holiday.

Yeah. But we didn't know this until like a couple of days out, when April was going through the bag again to make sure that there's a hat in there jumping was his lunchbox on the bag or no, no, that's my that's my bag From when I was a kid, I did that all the time. My mom hated it. She's like, oh, Oscar's got an oral presentation to do, and it was sort of like on a subject of their choice. It's for a minute long a minute, but

So Oscar gave, We agreed, I agreed, enforced.

I enforced it not only because we happen to be collecting the NRL cards, the trading cards.

Oscar loves it again we meet. What do you collect them from getting.

From the post office? Great? Okay, yeah, I've got a dealer.

Just quickly, what's a packet worth four bucks? It's very reasonable? Yeah, it's pretty good.

Yeah, considering Pokemon's like fifteen bucks at the moment Bloody Markets. When we were having a conversation, he had the manly ones all his favorite players up, so he's like, I want to talk about my favorite player anyway. We were like, okay, whatever, you know, take take the card because they're allowed to have visual aids and anyway. So first day, drop him off and then we completely forgot about it, like a

What did he practice it?

Not with me? Didn't because I was like, you're good. Like I was like, you're good with these set these cards and you're ut dural and was like, yeah, I'm just going to talk about each and every player and like, to be honest, he can pick them all out right, and I'm like, you know, you got to make it last like a minute. It's a long time. He was like, how long is a minute? I'm like, oh god. And then I was like after it was all said and done, and like he obviously lost the trading cars because kids

I think, yeah. I mean, I'm not a teacher, I think, but that's child abuse.

Dude, That's what I was thinking.

I'm questioning that the ethics of your school.

Well, maybe they just want to give them some confidence.

Yeah, but am I. It's like, do you want your kid to swim? Yeah, you're not going to throw them in the fucking ocean are you about. I'm going to put him in the kidde pool first. Whereas with Oscar, it's like and his students in his class.

Well, I think they're probably like, maybe like the minute was like that no longer than a minute. Maybe that was I didn't really read the thing because I'm me, I never read anything. Uh, maybe it was like you can't go over a minute, and they were like, just come in and show. Maybe it was like a show and te.

Maybe it was showing to we're talking this an oral presentation, but on the thing is an oral presentation, and I was just showing.

That's how it gros. But yeah, I was like, this is way too young. But like we have been given homework and stuff over the course of term wine and forgotten to do pretty much all.

Yeah, we're at the homework stage and it's really it's really hard. What was struggled with Nash is she's in the after school care until I quarter to five, when I pick her up, get home, she's tired, we have dinner, good in bed. It's there's no time for the homework.

No, there is no time for not that age, no way, I don't remember having homework at that age.

And after dinner, I'm like, do you want to read this book? And she's like, ah, like I've had I've had a heck of a day fuck off literally. So it's but the thing that's really the thing that I'm finding really difficult at the moment, very frustrating, is the fact that we talked about school uniforms, talked about the cost that we're currently incurring, and she's just losing jumper after jumper after jumper. It's a jumper massacret.

Yeah, Oscar for some reason, refuses to wear his jumper. Like those kids it's not cool enough. He's not.

There's always that kid who doesn't matter how cold it got, they never wore a jumper.

He's one of them. Yeah, he's one of those kids. He's not cold blooded, that's for sure. He's definitely warm blooded, like he doesn't need it.

But he's like a guy could in. He came from Melbourne, which made a lot of sense. He never wore a jumper. Ian Yeah, Ian in my school. Oh, he was just like the one kid he doesn't wear a jumper. Yeah, that's an Oscar.

Yeah, I don't know, because he's like if we're riding the bike down. It's cold. You gotta wear it on the bike. And he's like, God, I'm not asking you that old world hunger.

Dude, You're blessed having a Chilotte doesn't wear a jumper.

One less thing to lose.

It's a miracle.

Did you get that hat? Bat?

Which hat?

Didn't she lose a hat?

She's lost three hats.

We keep gaining.

Hats, dude, Send and oscar this way, just like a mate's just picking up Marley. Even she came home without her jumper, but her cousin's jumper, which is like three sizes too big. So I was like, call my sister. I'm like, somehow Marley's got your daughter's jumper. And so now I sent her to school two jumpers.

She came back with three.

She came back with none, and I was like, where are your jumpers? And she's like, what are you talking? You're like close and so close, and I'm like, how where do you put your jumpers when you take them off? And she's like I don't know. And then and I was like, listen, listen, jumpers are really expensive when you take it off, and I need you to put it into your bag. And then she was like, would you just stop harassing me about the jumpers? This is bullying and she starts.

Crying and I'm like, oh ah, raw, It's funny when they did that, you know the Easter hat parade, but before that, they make the Easter hats. So did you guys do that at school? So you had to provide what you wanted to decorate it with, but they did at school. So the instructions were from the school is buy the decorations, give them to the kid. The kid brings them in and they stay in there like pigeon hole until it's time. Okay, oscar no dramas. Lenny Mike's

You just give up, wouldn't you, like, just don't like, don't give him to him anymore until like the last day, when.

Yeah, I think that's what ended up happening, and I would just like, oh fuck it. I was putting his bag on the day of, but it was it was two weeks. I remember every time I was at the top and I'm like, here he comes so funny, like he's just been shopping.

Hey, I've implemented something which I don't want to say is great parenting, but so far it's working. Wonders go on. We had an issue at home, the fact that our kids love getting out of bed in the middle of the night, always around midnight one o'clock, come into our bed and lately, we've had Lola, we've had Marley, and we're just like, this is it's getting too much like she'd be Laura and she's pregnant. I have a pregnant wife right now and the kids have no regard for

Can I say, please, you don't have a very big bed.

It's not a big bed.

Get a king.

It's a single.

Get a king. We just stack o. It's just a double. I can't.

We're fitting there. Bro Also, that's an expensive mattress.

Make it fit.

I'm not made of money.

An influence. I just influence your way into one. It's not that easy.

What so we were, You'll have it.

You'll have a new bed by the end of this episode.

So we have a rule. Now, the kids, it's not sponsored love going to Yochi on a Friday after school. Pick them up. Explain to me what yochi Isochi's just frozen yogurt with topics you can get like Tella, you get sprinkles, you get musk sticks.

Can I ask you a more scientific question? Absolutely is frozen yogurt, just yogurt that's frozen. I believe so yes, okay, yeah, I believe. So we love it. People love it. My mom Nana hates it. So I could buy a tuber yogurt freeze it myself and that would you get the same result. I don't know.

I've got some yochi here if you'd like some. Okay, Well, kids love it. They're ubsessed and they it's like crack for them and all the kids from school. They go there on a Friday, so it's nice pick them up, walk down there. So I was like, listen here, your little fucker is right before they go to sleep, isn't he. I was like, we're going to start on a Monday. If you want to get yochi on a Friday.

Do they know what Monday is?

Kind of?

It's like you just like I start today? Yeah? Like how many sleeps?

And I was like, you need to get five stars. We're going to do a little chart. Five sleeps, five sleeps. The only way for you to get a star is by spending the whole night in your bed.

Love it? What do you? Oh? You got to people? Here we go. Bowler is killing it.

Yeah, yeah, Lola's smashing it. She's doing really well. She really wants she is due for a Yochi. Smiley faced is today Yochi day? Today is are you on the phone talking.

About to Yochi about someone else? But now I have a proper mash. You have another child that doesn't deserve.

Narlie's like, fuck the Yochi. Right during the week, I would say to her, she would hop into bed and I'd say, let me just remind you. You have the option right now? Is it one in the morning. I'm like, you can go back into your bed, and remember, if you do that, you'll get a star. The star will go towards the yogi. If you stay in this bed, you will get no stars. No stars for you this evening? What would you like it to be? And She's like, fuck the Yochi.

Just let me come bed for She's weighed up the options. She knows what she's going to get more value out of. Smart Really, have you ever thought about this, please going from the Yochi and saying, okay, if Yochi is not what's going to get it for you have that we just go all the way and go with ice cream like gelato dude, the same thing.

The yoach she lived. Tell you that the position of the yochi is actually right next to and they prefer the and they prefer the yochi. Yochi is it's hot right now?

That's it. I'm investing.

It is hot property.

Frozen yogurt. It's cyclical. Sorry, it's cyclical. What the is that? Like the cycle of the moon, the cycle of the tides, or the menstrual cycles.

I have been through many cycles of frozen yogurt. I remember five years ago they were all shutting down and then it just comes back every now they're back. I don't know what's happened. I don't know who's controlling these frozen yogurt markets. But frozen yogurt is back.

Cyclical, cyclical. When do you think it's going to go again?

It's got I think two years in it and then it's gone good three at the most.

I think.

But now the issue is ash Marley's only only had as you can see two successful nights. Do they have to be in a road?

Do you not start again? Well?

Because what do we do now? So I picked up from school, Do I give her a yochi or or do I say I'm sorry, you have to come with me with Lola to get the yochi. You don't get any yo chi, which will result in a tantrum, which will she'll end up getting it, but then she doesn't learn the lesson. Then all of a sudden, this is what I would call a classic conundrum. Okay, Lola deserves it, obviously, what would I do? Dig really deep, tell me, tell me. I would give me an insight into how ash parents.

First of all, I get a whiteboard for this, so I.

Didn't ask you to critique the system. I asked you to just answer, if Marley is deserved.

It makes the system better, because which will help in this situation because you would have rubbed that off the board and you can be like, look you've got nune, you know what I mean, and you can start again. You can start fresh today, so next week. But now you've got stickers involved on perishable paper. What I would do?

So it's not sustainable, it's not sustainable. It's terrible thinking about the clients.

Well you should be, is yochi? Thinking about the climate. I would say you're in for a meltdown. That's one thing. If you say no, and I would stick to your guns, because if you stick to your guns, you can then go right. We're going to cross Marley out here, put her down. The next one is this meant to be for the third child that's not here yet, Sleep in your own bed, and he's yelling at Laura's tummy. Get it right back then you can. Oh god, I'm a

Because then if I sneak it it to Lola, then she as soon as pick up Marlo, she'll be like, hey, guess what you missed out on?

Yeah, they do, they do do that, But then I just started calling them lies. He's lying. But it's more. Yeah, you're in for a meltdown.

The old star system a tailor as old as time.

So another option could be which I do this sometimes, Yes, is when like, for example, the kids are having dinner and I'm like, okay, look if you eat all your dinner, there's a treat at the end, right, similar concept, but I always say it's one in all in, So if Oscar eats all his dinner, no one gets anything until Macy's eaten all of hers.

So they've got to like cheer each other on.

Yeah, teamwork makes the dream work.

So if Lola wakes up and sees Marley walking out with the room in the middle of the night, she'll grab her and be like, get the get back to bed and don't even think about it.

But that couldn't It might not work with this situation because you don't want to argument in the middle of the night, right, as.

Long as they argue in their room and no room, that's fine.

Yeah, because it's like they.

Want to if they want to go at each other fight wake up mys hog tied at the corner of the room.

Yeah, so I would.

There you go. Yeah, I do think about it.

It wouldn't be ideal. If you had to walk into that in the middle of the night, I would say this this time, I would stand your ground.

Okay, well, I look forward to the kids having yo chi tonight, both.

Of them extra, give them extra. Laura is pregnant. We all know this. Now it's out there. We know the gender. But we were talking about how I accidentally miss grandparented someone. Remember refresh my memory. So I was at a park with someone and I was like, is this your grandchild? They're like, no, this is my child. Remember.

Can we just quickly for anyone who missed that episode? She was an older parent.

She looked like an older parent, and ash.

Ash went up to this mother and then spoke to her in a way which I referred to her as being the nana.

Yeah, and look what a disgusting I'm only human. It's a bad way. But you asked me if I've accidentally asked someone if they like accidentally assumed someone was pregnant. Yeah. Now I didn't do that, but I did something that I'm not proud of. And I was quite a younger man in this situation. So I was like early twenties and I was at a friend's house and he having people over and well, you know, there's drinks and blah blah. I was like, I was like a party. I am

Little snacks. There were people, there was music.

I just didn't want you to, okay, well, to be anytime gathering.

It's a gathering.

It was a funeral. Actually anyway. A friend of a friend came, you're very funny, thank you. A friend of a friend came to a park. A friend of a friend came to this party who I haven't seen in a long time. And she walked in and she was pregnant and I didn't know that, and yes, I'm gonna regret this. I blurted out, whoa, you're huge.

Oh my god? How big was she?

Twins? Obviously huge, big pregnant girl.

But I hadn't she just popped or you hadn't seen her for a while.

I didn't even know she was pregnant. She was a friend of a friend, but I knew her and I she walked in.

Spit your drink out, I legit did. I was like, but do you know what I would have said if I saw her, well you look beautiful.

Yeah, come over here, take you shoes off.

Ah, anyway, are a foot guy?

Guilty?

No?

I I just blurted it out. I had no control over the situation you have, add I felt horrible afterwards. Also, her husband still a husband. He was a police officer, and anyway, some time had passed, Like I'm talking months had passed. Okay, I have been pulled over for a random breath test and guess who it is? The husband? Wow, And just in that moment, he happened to be breathalyzing me and he was like, remember that time at blah blah blah party and we walked fashion and I was like, no,

Groveling over her feet.

I was like, I was like no. I just kept saying things like you're not that big, and I was like, can I get your drinks? She's like, you're pregnant. Win this one, But I was, you know, do you think I've ever been around a pregnant person that point?

I think when you look at a situation like this, you have to look at the intent, and I think, in a credit to you, you felt bad afterwards. There was no intent to offend, and you know you, sometimes good people make bad decisions.

I'm a person. Yes, Oh my god, when we snip that up, just please to keep that for later on.

I think it's fine. Can I ask you just on a side note, I know recently we spoke about the fact that I find Laura attractive where April was pregnant with Oscar and Macy. How did you view her? Um, I didn't expect you to think about it.

I was trying to remember. I don't remember. I think. I don't think I changed. I was like wow, walking in the room, I was like, I just played this music over and over time you walked do do do do do do do do No. I don't think my feelings changed about it at all. I would say that I was the same level of attracting. There wasn't a stage where I wasn't was like, you're unattractive.

Another question for you, did you go through a phase whilst April was pregnant where she had a heightened sexual appetite.

Yeah, I would say it was slightly high.

I really thinking. I remember.

I remember there was one Austray Day long weekend April was very pregnant, Go on Oscar on Macy. I think it was Oscar. Yeah, because we wouldn't. We wouldn't have left Macy or Oscar behind you go. Yeah, and it was. It was a good trip because of the heightened libido of my life at the time. Yeah. Actually, I do recall that specifically that weekend, but I'm not gonna site here be like she couldn't keep off, especially when I'm

I don't know if it's a real thing. People keep messaging me being like, has Laura had that little that little window where she gets super frisky And I was.

Like, yeah, No, I don't think we will it happened?

Is it coming?

But pregnant? It's like people just dming new pictures of their bellies now that I wish kidding? What about I get like a little hairy snail. You've seen those, like they're really pregnant ladies. And because it's.

Obviously I don't, I don't see that asht. What I see is someone said in a comment, and I was like, that's perfect. It's like an artist stepping back and admiring their work. Yeah, it's like a builder, a builder looking back at the Eiffel Tower. I mean, like I created that.

You just step back, bring a level.

Perfect.

It's blum perfect, It's blum. Anyway, I felt like I needed to tell you that because it helps me close the circle of my traumas to be able to talk about how I fat chamed a pregnant lady accident.

I thought. I thought when you told me there was a scenario with someone who was pregnant, I thought you were going to tell me that. You were like, when's the June And she's like when you No, thank God, have you done that?

No? Thank Heaven, I don't think so.

So you are a good guy.

Deep deep, deep down, Matt, should we go into parents. Yes, it's time for paraunt. I said it like you did, parahant pah.

We do have to apologize for the fact that we've been teasing an intro jingle for this segment for a very long time and it hasn't happened.

It will.

We keep running out of time. We had a long lunch, have a long lunch, and we are we have no one to blame but ourselves.

But it'll happen next week, next week. Promise, next week happened. This one comes from Angela. Thank you Angela for writing in. Huge thanks, huge, huge thank you. She says, it's very short, but punchy.

What's the deal?

What's the deal with school drop offs? Absolute carnage.

It's a nightmare.

It is a nightmare. I feel like it's been a nightmare for decades.

Also, we have to take a moment and just think about all the parents who have kids in KINDI where it's not just drop and go. It's like a drop walk in. It's a debarcle handover. It's yeah, you know, I don't know you guys still walking in.

No, only only this week because it was the first week back and he was it was raining, just nothing really aligned for him, and he was.

Just a bit How many car parks do you have outside your school?

Well, we don't. We've got, like I'll try and explain it as best as possible. Is a this is a visual no, this is an audio medium. Very good, thank you. So they've got car parks like proper ones where it's a curb to read, a curb curb, and then they've got like a separate section which is just like curb side drop off.

Oh, they've got like the two tier.

Yeah, but the problem is at the top there of the school is kindergarten as well, like separate like a like a only about children whatever they call it, so that you're competing with that too. Yeah, but the street itself really narrow, and people try and go up and turn around and come back, and it is chaos. Thankfully, I ride the bike most of the time, but when you drive, you've got to give yourself an extra twenty minute.

There's got to be some level of exemption at my school. I don't know if yours is the same, but at our school they always have pretty much i'd say like three or four out of the five days of the week for drop offs in the morning and pick up in the afternoon. They have parking inspectors. Oh, hovering, Yeah, we've got one, give me a break.

It's a two minute it's a two minute. It's a two minute drop off usually yeah, yeah, yeah. But like also, if I saw a parking expector being like, okay, let me just time you right now.

I'd be like, oh, come on, man, come on, don't get don't get the hard working, tired, exhausted parents like we're doing our best, we're hanging on by a thread. They get the people who are fucking down at the beach and parking there for hours, and then like the real criminals. You know, there should be there should be, it should be agreed. That's school to just I get if you're parking for like hours and a no stopping zone, I get it, you know, but come on, I.

Think like you're right, especially if it's like a drop and go situation. It's like, okay, we'll give some room for you to be able to actually get out of the car, walk them the thirty or forty feet or whatever it might be so they're comfortable. But there would be and you know that there would be parents at whatever school. It is who's like enforcing be quicker and be those people out there, And if you are that fucking person, pull your fucking head.

Would you like have a good hard look at you have a good hard stone, look at yourself in the mirror and ask if you're fighting the good fight or not?

Because you're not, Because you're absolutely not. And it's like people.

Who you're going to one day wake up and realize that, actually I don't want to attack him too much.

I let's get after him. You know who you are, You're.

Going to have the guilt of knowing that you're on the wrong side of history.

Yeah, totally, because like I feel like there it would be there would be those parents that would write to the school going this number plate, this number plate, this number plate, they they parked for five minutes instead of two minutes. If that's you, you're the fucking worst person that exists.

We did have a my primary school, we did have a system which it wasn't ideal for like when you had to take your child inside the school grounds, but it was like there was like a holding pen almost of cars where then they would get sent in one by one to do like like stop kiss store open go, yeah, okay, And it was like explained, it was like a known thing. There was there was a very thorough process, and so you could funnel through a really high volume of cars.

That is outstanding.

I think that. I think the principle was he was very like methodical and how he planned. I try not to do a miile farving.

It's like, there's got to be something. There's got to be something. I think. I feel like in general as a human population, we neglect our parking situation a lot around schools, especially around schools, but for example, what do you think?

What do you think?

I'm thinking, I'm thinking this is much bigger than just schools. This is the bigger deal. For example, I went to Movie World and you went to Movie World too? Did you have to park there? I did?

Correct.

It is a debarcle, like they never heard of storied car parks up there. It's just like one big fucking field.

You know, you're parking.

Literally, my shoes were muddy before I even got to the to the park. I was like, well, I got to turn around now and go home. It's stack them up anyway. Do you think schools could stack them up too? What do you mean like have like a like a a like a mall situation. Well no, no, you couldn't do that.

No, we got to get moving.

Oh shit, Sorry, okay, anyway, good rant, and there needs to be a solution.

This is from Anna, She says, Hey, sorry, hello, Anna, I apologize as a mother of three under three. God send help, she says, absolutely if we knew where you were, said, I want to share a pair rant that I'm particularly passionate about seeing it. Sister, why the f just swear, Ana, It's fine, we're Why the fuck aren't all parks fully fenced?

Question Mark, very good question.

I just want to sit and have a coffee while my kids are running Mark without fear of them running under the road, are going for a swim? Because most parks have ponds while we're out at what do you mean.

Most parks have ponds in BONDI maybe we don't have any ponds in our parks. You've got ponds they're fishing there.

Well that's centennial par.

Fuck.

Shut up, while we're out at. All parks should have a coffee van. I feel like most do.

Hang on, you've got ponds and coffee vans. Well, what's next? Foot rubs?

Why are you all about the feet today?

So I'm just trying to wrap my head around these parks you're going to.

No, I do you think you're picking out the parts? Obviously you want to go somewhere that has the facilities to cater to your knee. So you're going to a park knowing that there's a cafe close by. Okay, yeah, I guess so, yeah, feet, I agree. Fence in the parks.

Yeah, I think that's a I think it should be mandatory, like you fence a pool, your fence around your house. Yeah, your fence everything. They fence them in at school. Now, might as well fence them into a park, make everything into a prison. Why not.

Listen to questions?

Yes, let's go.

We've got a couple of here. Ash Okay, I got the first one here from a Amanda. She asks, how do you introduce your children to their new sibling?

Very good question, Very good. When we had Macy in the hospital that we had Macy in during because it was a planned c section, were there for a couple of days after the recovery for April. But they have a class all about this, and they have an expert in there giving you tips.

Like what do they say, like get the blanket from a newborn baby.

No, it was like it was a lot around.

Not attention.

Attention you want to say neglecting, because that's that's criminal. It's more like filling the other child's cup. And one of the tips that we got was that was a bit cheeky, was when you give your eldest child a cuddle, don't be the first to let go. So, for example, I cuddle you, not a get your compliant for the cuddle. There's consent, So can I have a cuddle? Yes, and you hold on until they go. I'm like because it's like then they go. But we do it and my kids are so clingy.

It's like like, why are we going to let go for fuck say, especially with April and oscar Oscars, Like A was like, oh, I can't give me a cuddle and then it's like okay, she might like release and he's like lashed on her arm and he's like, well, this.

Is us for the rest of the day. Then was so that was one of the tips that back We didn't backfire. It just my kids are too clinging.

I never heard that.

Thank you, there's a whole class thank you. The whole class. So when you have your third, just hug the other ones for as long as you can. There he is, I'm precious. Next question. Hopefully that answers your question, Amanda, Okay, I have. This is from anonymous Matt. What's the lamest injury you've ever got? Talking domestic?

Look, you get to a certain age now that I'm itching towards forty. There I said it. You are, thank you. You are also in that bracket you are, And once you get to this age, injuries all of a sudden, you know they're not reserved for situations where you're like, you know, having a car crash that's falling off.

The stuff, you know, all the cool stuff that I'll.

Kill you becomes so much easier to attain.

An injury.

I've just gotten over one recently. I mean the big one, you know, was like you sleep in a weird position, you wake up and you can't move your neck. But I had a scenario where I went for a swim in the ocean, and as I sometimes like to do, I give a flick.

Because you've got hair, bit of hair. Yeah, so I just you're trying to be hot never.

And so I got out of the water and I gave a flick and went.

Oh oh yeah, and I was like help, help.

That was almost on bond I rescue.

I flicked my beautiful lush just there and now my neck out.

It's a back injury. You can never be too you can never.

Be too short. Lay down like wet on the board and roll you on one side, put the board on, roll you back.

It lasted for a good five days until I got a complete movement back, hapening on panetol like every single day.

Seeing the physio what happened, and she's like nothing, just old man.

I attacked my bed.

I have one, which I'm not proud of at all. Okay, I'll set the scene for you. I can. I'll be quick because I know you've got time constraints, constraints. I'll be really quick. So I was when Macy was just born. And we're living in a complex where the car park for the complexes in the middle and it's wrapped around with buildings. Okay, so I've gone via KFC and picked up a Zinger box for myself. Okay, it's in the

Getting old sucks genuine out there. Who's under the age of thirty savor every second, No, no sudden twists. Yeah, before you know what, you'll be as pathetic as me.

But do you know now? What I do is if I ever have anything in the passenger seat, I actually get out walk around.

I learned, especially as food. I'm like, I don't need that again, what are you training for? Nothing?

Ash?

Yes, If any listeners have any questions, if there's something a topic they would like us to give our a nine or they have a pair rant parent, where should they send it to?

They could send it to as they like, Tutoring Dads or TikTok dance or Facebook or Hello at two dot Dan.

Stop very well, sad And if you've enjoyed this episode, any episode of Two Doting Dads, we love it. We love it so much it fills our cup.

Share it with a friend.

If you share with a friend, or subscribe if you haven't already, and Lastly, just give a review, a few stars, a couple of comments. For God's sake, don't give a number of stars in a comment. When I see there's been a new review and there's no comment, God, it annoys me. Just give it to me now, but until next time. Stay safe. I feel like I'm joy Shpringer.

Stay safe? What does he say?

Stay saved?

Okay? All right Sam.

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