#104 Oscar’s New Trick, School Orientation, and DJ Ash’s Big Oops

I just want to start off by saying, it's been a really good run, but all good things come to an end. It has been a while since I've shipped myself done.

Welcome back to two doting dads. I am Maddie Jay and I'm Ash And this is all God. Maybe one of the first few times that I've stuffed up that intro line. This is a podcast all about parenting. It is the good, it is the bad, and the relatable. And if you've come winning any advice, it's not going to happen, not today, but we are going to talk about Ash shitting himself. Take it away.

Yes, So I was here and I did say to you. I was like, yo, No, I said, I was a bit a sort of time and I had to leave.

I did hear you upstairs in the bathroom? Oh god. I pretended to open the door and then I was like, just kidding, and then you were like yes, and then you started playing music.

No, I was on TikTok And so after I had left, I was like, oh, I just didn't feel great.

I don't know.

It was a big weekend. What's happening.

It's the Barley Belly coming. Could be bally.

Belly anyway one way home because my parents were coming to stay with us, so they were already there. Okay, So I was on the way home and I tried to sneak out a little far the car. It turned out to be shit, but I was more worried about I'm like, fuck myself. But then I thought, I'm going home, but I'm not going home to not I've got to get home and then greet my parents and hug my parents after stewing in your stewing my shit for like an hour.

Thank god they didn't notice. So would you do just beline or just say hey everyone?

I was like, you know, you to hug with the hips out.

Mom's like, what are you doing? My good? An erection? Bye? Literally, like when you have an erection, you have to like hunch over tucket sink it back in. Was it a big one?

Nah, it's just a little a little squirty, little watery squirt up, little squirty bump. Anyway, I'm fine now, it's good to have you back. It is good to be back. I'm not feel reborn.

Yeah, up until now, I've been like, there's something weird about ash. I can't quite put my finger on it. Here it is. M Sorry, I'm so thirsty right now.

I was just going to say that because I'm thirsty too, because we my parents come over to my house and they do love that. I have a fridge full of stonewood, stone and wood. Your mum drinks stone and wood. Momum loved Actually, mom loves this one the best, but she can only have one because what happens she feels a bit pissy, and we are talking about the Hinterland Hazy pale al from Stone and Woods.

Actually, does your mom like a shandy? Do you know what a shandy is? Just diabetic? Oh okay, well that's awkward way to bring the mood.

You'll have a schooner, a hazy balou.

Thank you. I cannot wait. Put my lips around this ic cold can. Let's crack it open and taste a sweet nectar. You've earned that one. Actually, I have ten days, ten days of pounding the pavement for Ned's uncomfortable challenge. Those of you who don't know cut my nails and can't get the can open. Oh I got it.

Oh well, the cheers for your siplement.

Thank you, cheers Ashton.

Oh so the Hinterland Hazy was a Limbits release, but he's now.

Part of the full time family. Matthew.

It is just bloody good beer.

And where can you get it? In any good bottle shop? And it's now pouring on tapping any good bar or restaurant. If it's a ship bar, they don't have it. If it's get the hell out of there and get to a good bar. And if you're still struggling to find it, you can of course order it online if you're lazy or don't like interactions with other humans, like Ash at Stonewood dot com dot au. That is all one word, Ash, I'm glad you acknowledged my incredible achievement of human endurance.

I'm glad someone acknowledged it.

Yeah, do you know what I was expecting? I am, of course talking about it's the Ned's uncomfortable challenge. Ten days of doing something uncomfortable. I got involved.

I didn't, Well, my life is pretty uncomfortable, so you know, always challenge.

And stupidly, we were doing live streams while NED was running, and I wasn't that keen to get involved because I was like, I just don't know, it's hard to find time to make this work. I've got the kids. You know, I've got I've got the podcast, incredibly busy with the podcast, our friendship, Our friendship. Your phone calls four a day minimum? Have reduced them? You have reduced them.

Yeah, that's because you insulveded me last time.

Credit where credits due? And then in the moment during the live stream, they were like, we're doing we're all going to do sixteen k's a day. Why sixteen because it's ten percent of what Ned was doing per day. Ned was doing one sixty per day. So they were like, we'll do sixteen per day. And in the moment, you're just like one point six for me. Thanks, You're like, yeah, absolutely, I'll do it. It's like when you're with a group of people and they're like when should we hang out

Well you thought you were expecting like, that is an amazing achievement, Pully pants down. Yeah, I'm going to show you what an amazing achievement that is.

That's what I was going, I did nothing at all. It was like I came home and said, I've just killed a cat on the road. It's raspberry. She was just had a look of shock, and I was like, why this is I'm raising money for those in need, those who are experiencing homelessness. It's a huge problem in Australia, you know, obviously does she not know that? Yeah? I was like, do you not care about those people experiencing homelessness? And she goes, no, I do. But it's just like,

Yeah, like with the endorphins that late it's not good.

Also, when you do it that late, I can't sleep. I get home, Yeah, that's what I mean, Like, yeah, you're fucking wired. I'm up till midnight. So ah, And so I would try and help out with the kids. I'd like speed through the process of dinner and bath, and then I would hand them over to Laura and say I've got a run now. Obviously sometimes didn't go to plan. Yeah, I'd have to leave. The kids hadn't been fed. Occasionally occasionally, not every time. She don't look

I do, I do. I've suffered.

It's weird. I often look at myself and think, if it was reversed like I have, if I could have the amount of hair on my asshole on my face as a beard.

I don't think you want to ask hair on your face there, No, but the same coverage, the thickness what yeah, No, I have to show you sometimes I can't wait to see it.

I have to show I've thought about getting it laser. Whether it's me or my back, whether it's me on all fours or all fours. Please, I'll do any position you like. It's that they're like, they're like five. No, they went really long. Yeah, shut up the true story.

I think that ask chafe should be more widely recognized and talked about.

Didn't you have ask chaf recently? I did? I can't remember. It was you were squatting and doing the self application, that's right. That was a while ago.

It was when I was doing third I was doing ten K's Day for thirty days.

But do you know what I did?

I used the vasoline, but the vacilline started to heat up and it felt like my asshole was on fire. It was like, I don't know what to do?

Was with that?

But baby powder? Bam?

It isn't that a carcinogenic? Now? Isn't that doesn't give you cancer?

Isn't a carcinogenic? Oh that's no I was thinking of something else.

I'm pretty sure. Yeah, it gives you cancer. Like it.

It doesn't give you cancer. They say, don't smoke, it gives your cancer.

Stone would You're welcome? Good call. Don't smoke, it gives you cancer, gives you cancer. I did it. I did it. Have you raised and not? I don't say this to get a pat on the back. I don't do it for the recognition, Ash, I just do it to inform you and the listeners. Oh, great that we raised. You want to give me some praise, I'll take it. I think we raised. It was twelve five hundred dollars. Wow, twelve No, I don't need that, Ash. Not necessary. The crowd goes wild. Not necessary.

That's very good. I'm proud of you. I saw that so glad. I didn't do it because, honestly, man, I did two k's yesterday and my chords are killing me. Two k's anyway, it's enough about running.

That's end.

Last week we did talk about briefly about how I was called in to do the ceremony music for my sister.

Yes, she is wedding. You were the DJ. I was the DJ.

I got sent the playlist, the timings, and what she wants to do. It was just for the ceremony only.

Can I just say, and not not to have a go at you. But it's a big responsibility to put on the shoulders of yourself at a wedding. Yeah.

No less my sister's wedding. She's a little bit bossy sometimes and I thought better for not fuck this up. I was nervous. Everyone was nervous for me. Why you, I don't know. I think she just thought I shall be there. He can do it. So it was just to be on Spotify. I was had very strict instructions have my phone on airplane mode so that no one called. I said, no, it calls me. No one's interested.

That's not true. Did you put it on aeroplane mode. No.

I didn't want to missus Sex and it was going to be on a Yui Boom.

Love that.

So my job was to get there, connect my phone to the Yui Boom ready to.

Go airplane mode.

Airplane mode wasn't on. I thought, we don't need it. Come on, No one's going to call me on a Saturday. No one did, thankfully, But.

I thought about calling you. You should have. I would have just started everything.

Everything that I wasn't supposed to do would have ticked the last box anyway. So I got there early, connected, beautiful, ready to go, started to enjoy a drink, saw my soon to be brother in law, you know, I wished him, but as you do, all the pleasantries and then everyone's sort of sat down and my sister has.

Arrived to walk down the aisle. How was she looking?

She looked beautiful, beautiful, and I thought, it's go time. So I've gone to start the song. The UI boom auto disconnects after a certain amount of time, God turns herself off like battery savor mode. So first of all, that's happened, and I'm like, fuck, fuck, fuck fuck, that's one thing.

Fuck fuck.

But thankfully my niece has seen my sister at the other end of the aisle and had to get to her, as three year old two and a half year olds do. She's ran up the aisle to try and get to her, and thankfully she fell over. Clumsy, clumsy, but she's brought me some time. I was going everyone, I was like, I've got this, turned it back on. It makes and you know UI booms, they make funny noises like or like connection noises, So that's come on, sigh of relief.

Were ready to go? Can I ask if the niece was okay?

Niece was fine, gray on grass, thank god, oh thank you fine?

And was it just was it just she tripped on her own feet? They did someone throw a glass at her? Or just no?

She was just running and tripped over herself as these small children.

Do you sure you didn't love a schoonup? I'll buy me five minutes.

And I was like, thank god. And then after a couple of minutes she had a little cry. I was like, here we go.

The nise did. I was like, here we go, ready to go.

And I don't know if you know this about Yui booms, but when you hit maximum volume, it also cuts out and goes.

For a quick second. There's a very there's silence. Can I say, Yui boom, sort yourself out seriously? For what jbl not sponsored, we'd be fine. So it makes it and you know not to not to have a go at you. But you're someone who likes to do things to the maximum. Yeah, I wanted every under here. Yeah. So she's walking down the aisle and I'm slowly turning it up and you're a little more, little more.

Are you feeling it?

You feel it, feeling it? People are into it, yeah.

Not realizing that it's going to do this noise, and I guess it's.

And it goes and it's silent for a second, and I just go my bad midway through my only siblings wedding.

Walking up the aisle, and then I had really strict instructions to feed the music out.

Yeah nice, nice time. First of all, how do you do that volume down? That's what I That's what I tried to do. But it was like it wasn't as nice and smooth. It wasn't really a fade. It was kind of like a step out.

It was like volume on the phone, volume on the Yuie boom phone. Okay, we got there, and then I'm surprised you didn't like mid song start watching TikTok videos.

That's what my concentration is minimal.

It was a short ceremony, thankfully, But then I was also how much strength, be honest, did it take not to like lay down and start having a scroll. It was tough.

No, I was invested in the moment. I wanted to sorry, I wanted it to be perfect, but in doing so it was very imperfect. Anyway, I also had one other job, which was to help move people from the ceremony to the reception, which was a short walk.

I'm imagining people like, mid conversation, you're like palette wrapping them and let's go on a trial I had.

I was thinking, Fuck, how am I going to do this? You want to be nice?

I'm gladys Is like, who's this? Shut up and get in there.

So it's a short walk. I've just signed far three or four minutes up the road.

How many meters is that? Three hundred meters? Call it? Okay, it's not three minutes to.

That, but don't sorry, you're talking about me going into detail. I'm trying to reduce the amount of detail to get through it.

I'm just giving the people what they want. Excuse detail.

Okay, according to Google Maps, it's like a three minute walk, but that's at my pace, not at normal pace and fast walker.

I'm like, get there, three hundred meters. Come on, you're doing that, and I'm so twenty seconds per one hundred meters three hundred meters at least, you're doing it in like a minute.

Yeah, if there's a beer there I'm doing it, and I'm husein bold, I'm like, what doing anyway? So I thought to myself, how am I going to get How am I going to do it without being rude? I thought to the Great Award Shows of America where they play you out? Yes, So I downloaded the play you out music and I just walked around with the UI boom, playing people out of their conversations.

And so they eventually were like what And I was like, you need to move on to the next location. Everyone's like why is that nonverbal guy? Like the Jurassic Park music. I'm playing you out? You need to move to the next location.

Because they got to get there before my sister gets there because she's doing a quick photos and then it's gonna do the walk in there and that's all fun and games.

Again, I think it's a nice subtle touch.

They had a property ja that did.

You have any pushback from the guests? Just just the ones that I'm friends with, I're like, well this guy, And I was like, just fucking move card all your jobs? Will you have a security guard? No? But actually, oh.

God, that made me think about another job I had that I have never told you about.

And I just did it on the side.

Was it was the party higher sumo suits.

I know, I know what you're thinking. Bullshit.

No, true, very true. And it was for like hands and Bucks parties, did you know. So it was a friend of ours that had had the van, had all the sumo suits stuff that everything.

That.

So what we would do is we would get called in to do a job that he couldn't do because we just did it on the side. On like a Saturday Friday stay just deliver no no, no, we go, we set up, we show them how to use it, and then we hang around pretty much at the party, and then we pack up and we leave like a few hours later.

That sounds like a great job and also a dangerous one for you. Yeah for me, yeah, because you're like, I have one drink, like ten drinks.

So I was like eighteen. This is before he was married to Yeah, I was like eighteen. So me and a mate did that. Anyway, that's another job I had, Party Higher.

Just a man of the tripper. Yeah, so then you see you sorry, you got everyone moved to the next room and then we had three hundred meters. Yeah, a nice evening. Everything turned out. So I was successful. Did you Did you get emotional at all watching your sister walk down the aisle?

No, I got a little emotional when they were doing their vows.

Tears. No, what's that like? Sorry? What's that like?

I won't get me to cry on this podcast.

I had a not yearn I will eventually when it happens, can't wait. I had a little tearing when my sister was she was walking down the aisle and it was she was the first one to get married. It's a little emotional. Yeah, okay, and you know, okay, well fuck myself, Okay, Well.

You know everyone's different. I don't show emotions.

What do you mean different?

Everyone's different in terms of like what they find emotional and what they've don't find. It was a happy it's a happy moment, and I understand it, and I understand that.

I think, sorry, I've just got to stitch from what you're sitting down. That might be the problem. Sorry, I must have been like you have a heart attack. I've never known a man to get a stitch from sitting down. Sorry one, Okay, I'm good. Anyway.

That was my DJ debut, And if you want to hire me all the.

Sumo suits, what about you. Quick question. This is about a subject that you like to talk about, so I thought i'd bring it up for you, not for me. The renovations must have been nice. I have a question for you. I value your input here. Okay, you're a man who likes timber, who knows timber, who is familiar with timber, and so you're like the oracle of timber.

Yeah, yep, yep, Okay, so different, very different, but yeah in what way?

No, I just mean different? Do you like London?

London, timberyard? Two very different things.

But I know the both important moments of our lives that we should we should always.

I agree with you that I talk about as much as you talk about living in London. But I'm just saying they're very two different places. That's all, well seographically, well said, point taken.

Thank you. I appreciate what you're saying. Good and I can respect that. Okay, great's let's move.

On stairs, stairs, stairs in this place we have stairs must be not.

Also will say that we may or may not be getting some must be nice hats mate, Oh we are at some point. Yeah, I think they can't. We got like that will be nice, That will be very nice. Stay tuned for that. But stairs, okay, just really quickly. We want to talk about the runner for too long. But I need to make a decision on whether or not you want a square edge step or a bullnose step. Okay, for those you aren't familiar, a bullnose is a curved edge,

Is it like a full Oh? What about the option for pencil round?

Now you're just making things very complicated.

Half between square and bullnose A pencil A pencil round step pans around smaller, not not as sharp as a square, but not a round because with the with the bull nos, there's potential to slip off.

If you don't land on the step. Okay, do you want the lip to go to meet or do you want it to go overhang.

In the internal stairs on the not floating like that.

They've got rises and kicking. Do you reckon? What's the oracle going to say? To have it hangover? Really?

Okay, what does Laura want? She wants what I want?

It's not important law she wants what I want? Is you want it the other way? Didn't you? No? I'm open to anything, but I've been left with this decision.

Yeah, but you think that you've been left with the decision. This is the thing. You keep getting put in charge of things, but then the final decision you're getting steamrolled. So that's why I ask with the stairs, what is it that Laura wants?

With the stairs?

I don't know what she wants. I'll tell you what she wants. Whatever I said is what she wants.

I'm going to suggest the pencil nose. Fuck this mate, this fucking renot. Hey, it'll be nice you do it. I'm not. It'll be nice when it's done. I'm never doing it. But the building message just yesterday and he's like, hey, I need those locks locks for the doors.

Well, you got to keep everything safe.

Absolutely, But I was like, okay, how many locks do we need? And he's like, do you need me to count the doors? And I was like, how many free storms? And I'm like, I'm now going to try and find locks for every door.

Oh fuck, I don't envy your mate.

That's that's I don't want to be doing that.

I do not envy you, but I appreciate you keeping me involved.

Thank you. Can I just ask you really quickly? Yes? Have you done for school? For Oscar? Have you done any like transition days for KINDI.

He's done, it's done.

Three four?

Really I went to the first one yeah with him? Yeah, and oh that was more like like a tour day. We spent like a few hours there and you got to see the school. Then he spent time there alone.

And you're all the kids are doing that? Like how many other parents are there?

April has been taking I've been busy, but like, yeah, like a few and how many more will you do?

I think we got one more? Shit, I've missed all this. I feel like I'm here today.

You might not have missed it, and they might not do it there. Every school must do it differently.

No, I missed him. I have missed him. I got orientation tonight though, Oh with I'm going with Laura. No, Marley, it's a parent info nite on the first day of school, Marge, You're like, where am I going? And here it is never been there before. We have an orientation I think next month, but I'm going, which is very exciting. Going for the first time to figure out.

Where the school is very cool, what's the how long is it or what's it include? Getting real close to this. Now we should talk about this a bit more.

I don't want to talk about it because are you gonna cry? No? No, I don't feel like I don't feel I don't feel like I need to be any more prepared than what I am because Marley is just absolutely chomping to be there. Yeah, she's just she's ready. That's good, she's ready. She's also I think she definitely should go to one. Do you know what she's experienced? One? Like a half day they do? Yeah, I do it. But I've totally I've totally fucked next year.

Because you've done, You've moved. Kindy's right, move Kindys.

But then I forgot that we don't start school until Feb ten.

Yeah, it's like the ten fa Yeah, it's cold.

School holidays, bro, school holidays is just absolutely bending me over all. Yeah, Yeah, you're not even there, and then I'm like, so then I went back to the daycare. She's current on the art and I was like, can we come back? And they're like we're full. Oh, so what are you going to do? I don't know, dude, I don't know.

Nana, well, there's only one kid.

Yeah, but then I don't know if you. Ash is a bit whimsical, and.

She's a bit like, oh what do you hear the shops and forget that Marley's there, and then I'll be like, man.

Who where's you coming from? What do you do with Oscar?

Over that time? Yeah, he'll still go to his daycare for two days a week, the other one, the one that doesn't.

Anyway, Yeah, just for two days and then he'll be with me probably.

Majority of Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday.

Fuck, what are we going to do? Dude?

Just bring him along? Speaking of kids, Oscar has learned a new skill.

Please.

He's learned how to whistle, which is very clever because his mum can't whistle.

April can't whistle was because she just never learned or work. She also can't ride a bike.

Sorry, babe, do you know I tried to teach abebe how to ride a bike once as a fully grown adult. She did it really easily because she's a fully grown adult and can listen. But then she was like, I don't want to ride with his people. I'm like, so we're going to ride in private, said nighttime. She did it on a soccer field once.

Do you have any footage of her?

I wish I did, Probably probably can't share that. It would be so funny. We should try again, though.

Apparently there's a huge issue with this generation of kids because no one's learning how to ride bikes. Yeah, bikes are becoming redundant. Apparently. Yeah, they reckon that bikes will become extinct in like like twenty years. I feel sorry for all those bike people.

Yes, yeah, but he it's got me into a little bit of trouble. So I like to do the grocery shopping Sunday morning early enough so that the supermarkets are open, but the other ship shops aren't open, so people are really only just there to do.

You really hate people? Yeah?

Yeah, if you see me in public, don't come near me.

No.

Actually, I'm not that bad. I'm like GOODO.

I wear a mask, So I'd like to go early.

So it's a bit more quiet, and Oscar's a lot of time he's talking hate thirty my.

Wolf, very early nine o'clock.

Maybe it just depends on how but I always say Oscar because he is full of beans and he just needs to go and there's not many people at the shop, so he gets gass run.

Like run boy, come back here? What boy? Right?

But he's only learned how to a wolf whistle. Now, if you're not familiar with wolf whistling, it's bang, thank you. Not my strongest, but that's all he can do. Okay, So we've been go to the shops. It's quite early, we're down.

I think it was the sea Real Aisle and there is what.

I just I just love, I love, like well, the sound in that aisle because of all the cardboard boxes like reverberates, No, no, no, it stays within that area. Reverberates No if it was glass and reverberate, do you know anything about physics?

I'm sorry, let.

Me get back on track. But yes, it was the Cereal Aisle. We were looking for intragrain and there was one there was one lady in the aisle, and Oscar has decided to wolf whistle.

Good boy. At this lady. No, I'm jack. That's disgusting. No, no, no, but he didn't know. He doesn't know what he's doing. He's like.

And I was like, looked at her, and she looked at me. She's looked at the kid and thought there's no way that small kid can whistle. And she's gone.

And snell me and stormed off, and Oscar's like found the newstagrain, like no idea, your life happened, broke And so I was like, fuck, bro code man, back me up. You did that? And he was like what.

I'm like, you can't just walk around wolf whistling people because that's all he knows what to do.

You've got to teach him in their tune.

What should I teach him?

I don't know. They just like give him like bird noises because they need to be that weird kid who can whistle like a bird. That's me.

So anyway, Oscar's walking around town wolf whistling anything that walks past people confused, that's.

Lovely, It's makepie.

Is there a bird? How loud can you whistle?

That's all I got? That's how loud can you whistle? That's all I got? What about with your fingers. No, really, that's say your flex move. Thank you, well done.

Thank you anyway, just the town predator of the moment. If you see Oscar out and about any wolf, and if you see me out and about with Oscar and you think I've wolf whistle chair, I'm a happily married man.

And Oscar's like young, He's like you come here often, bless bless his cotton socks. Ash. We didn't do this segment last week, but I think it's time that we play. Do we is that we do this? Tell me loud, tell the little live he wants to go first? Who's first? Go first? Picky favorite? Okay, this is from Tanya has written in and she says I told my kids that every time they swear it's one less present, they will

How many presents do you start with? That's the questions i'd be asking your mum, What about I give you one?

Go hit me? Who wants to hear me? Terribly read? Whatever?

Feels like I'm going to go long today. I feel like I didn't make it up to you terrible.

How long have we got that's funny? Did you ever have to read that in class? No? Once?

I did it once.

I like, sometimes I get nervous reading and I'm aboud I'm a bad reading. I'm very good. No, I'm not. But sometimes Laura and I will read it at nighttime. We go page for page and Laura is flawless, and sometimes I'm like, don't stuff it up, and I'm like, tomorrow today very good.

I told my daughter when she was three that I found her in the woods. What okay, let me finish it.

And that's it. That's what I've time.

I found her in the woods, plucked all the feathers off her to prepare for cooking, and decided to keep her because I thought she was too cute. She believed me for a while.

This light came from her, asking why I always call her chicken.

I'll say, good morning, chicken.

I'm so sorry I missed the first line.

Sorry, be professional.

I told my daughter when she was three that I found her in the woods.

Sorry, and that's all we have time, so fuck okay, So essentially, let me reverse this one for you.

Okay.

The daughter continued to ask her why her mother her mom why she called chicken because she says good morning chicken, which is lovely. I love that. Like I call Masie possum.

What do I say? I found her in the roof anyway, that's bad, Jake. I liked it.

And so she told her that I found you in the woods, plucked all your feathers to prepare to cook you, but decided to keep you because you're so cute.

That's pretty messed up.

Well, the thing is she's going to go and tell us friends that, yeah.

But also like that poor kid's going to get to bed at nighttime, being like is tonight to night? If mom's like, gosh, that dinner wasn't that good, I'm still really hungry, the kid's.

Like yeah, She's like, where is that oven on? And nothing in it?

Well, take your clothes off in you go? Hey, is this an ick? Is this an ick? I'm gonna say, yeah. I call my kids and I don't know how we got here, but I call my kids Bubba? Is that a nick?

If there was like a cringe button, I'd be like, it's like it's like when we've spoken about this for when you talk to your kids in baby and I think it's okay to be like.

Hey, maybe don't draw on the wall. I don't say it like that. I'll say, hey, you don't draw on the wall. Bubba is that?

Or I'll say it's not look, it's not doing it for me.

Sometimes in public, I'll just say, come here, Bubba came here whatever.

I'm looking around, But I wonder what Bubba is. You gotta be careful because my grandmother's nickname and has her whole life is Bubby.

Okay.

She was called bubby as a kid and then she never grew out of it and friends have called her Bubby her whole life. And now she's about in eighty nine.

Is she happy? Was like where she she got? Like? Just in general? Is she happy? Yeah? She's psychological damage. Is she like, stop calling me bubby? She cries us off asleep over it?

Yeah, I would say it's a nick But who am I to judge?

You? Hate everything? Though? Yeah I do. I paid them more equally though. That's something. Okay, let's go into questions. This question is from Shannon Shannon, sorry, thank you for that. She wants to know what's your opinion on pulling your child out of school for a family holiday? Obviously we don't have kids in school yet, but we can talk about the foreseeable future.

Okay, this is how I see it. If it's a public school, fine with it. I'm paying for this private school education. The motherfucker is going to be there the whole term.

But they're the ones that are really strict on it. Friend of mine, don't to have names, my sister, Okay Clinton. They had their eldest at a school that you had to pay for, private school, if you will, they just been nice. If they took him out of school for a holiday, they would get like a letter of warning, warning for what what are they going to do? Well, yeah, kick them out. Well, hang on a minute, are we going to kick you out after you taking the kid out?

I would be more concerned with the school that was, like, you're getting a warning for taking your kid out of a school you pay for them to go to. It's done of your fucking business of what I'm doing with my kids.

Next year, You guys want to take another Barley trip and go away for six months. Yeah, okay, what do you do about Oscar leaven behind?

Don't take him out like it's no one else's business.

Primary school is the most non critical time of kids. Yeah, Like, I mean again, we're no experts here. I don't. Yeah, but I think if you want to go on a skiing holiday or take a boat trip for like a month and it's outside of school holidays, if it's in primary school, I think up until year five, fair play.

But hang on it, someone's someone's getting a warning. Get real, who how do you think the person who typed that up was feeling at the time?

To who may concern? They must have gone home.

And be like, guess what, babe gave his parents a warning today because they took their kids on holiday.

Shout out to all the teachers out there who are doing a great job. That's not a teacher, to that I was a teacher.

That's an administ a teacher, Well, they should be an admin assistant whoever that teacher is. If you're listening, that's oh god. But I think it's just a bit much.

I'd love to know from people who do have their kids in school already, Like when you want to take the kids out for a holiday. Do you just do you like fake an illness or do you just say like, hey, we're taking Timmy out to go. I think that's the correct qud. I want to be honest.

What's the point of being like he's really sick? And then you see me on Instagram when I've got oscar in a pool in Bali?

Well not everyone's got a million followers Ashwick's one day, you have a question, I have a question, and it's also holiday based. We love talking about holidays. Should we go on one? Yes?

We should more so. I was on holidays with a few different families.

Oh come on, we're going about this? We heard it last week.

Yes, and they're close friends. Yeah. So I've known the kids their whole lives. And my question is, Matt, is it okay for me to tell another child off that's a friend of mine's.

It all comes down to tone, which is one thing that you're not great at. That's a lie. You can at times be aggressive, I can fucking not condescending. Yes, okay, Yes, you have a very strong voice. I think it's a voice that you're I don't know if you're aware of its full capabilities and the impact that it has another people who have to hear that voice. Well said, you're like a man who has been born with so much strength that you're like crushing cans and people's hands when

How do yell at them?

I think it's I think it.

Comes down to how well you know the other family. Yes, I think it's okay to be like, hey, you know, don't hit people, and you.

Don't talk like that. I try to. How many kids do you hit when you're a balance? Zero kids? Just I'm joking, but they But it was more like in valance again's kids is not a funny matter just put just.

So you know, I disclaim up little asteris continue.

Isn't it.

It wasn't like it was just when you've got a lot of kids on holidays, as you know, they there's no boundaries with them. I found I find that I needed to set some boundaries with some of the kids. They kept coming into my villa and be like, go back to your parents for a second. I'm just I need to do something over here. But there was a couple of times where I'm like, can you go back?

Like not like you know, and it's kind of like, is that the wrong wrong with you? I'd be like, I get down to the letter this, you go back to your house right now. I throw your back. You know what's good for you? Yeah.

I just think like if you know them well enough and like you, I feel like the same with friends telling my kids off. But I know there'd be some parents out there to be like and you would know them really well and you'd be like, timmy, don't do that. And someone would be like, hey, dude, don't talk to my kid like that.

That sucks.

I think if your kid's been a little shit or a turd. I think it's warranted that if someone says, hey, don't do that because I don't like it in my space, do it in your space.

That's completely fine. What about okay, what about if someone would hurt your kid hurt and yes, hurt, and you know you have to play it down where like see someone hit Marley, but it's in front of everyone. Everyone saw it, and Marley's now crying and they're like, I'm so sorry about Timmy hitting Marley, and you're like, oh, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine. It happens. It happened to the kid's playing all the time. Did you have to do that, BALI?

Yeah, I think because like Oscar and Oscar and Lenny, so sorry about best friends.

Oscar being stabbed and you're like, oh, it's fine, fine, again, that happens. He's used to it. Yeah.

I think, like, for example, Oscar and Lenny like best mates and every day together, go to school together. If they fight best friends, they fire, and usually it takes two to tango. Okay, Very rarely are you with kids that know each other that one will just walk up and go fucking whushguf for no reason whatsoever, there's usually a reason. There's going to be the anominally kids that we're going to point them out. But those kids that do that because they might be wired a little bit differently.

Dad of the Year. The first Lenny's confident again, the first name was like, and he's like, and then because Oscar fo is Lenny does Lennie like you.

No, that's right, because Lenny's mom said to him like was disciplining him with something, and he goes, you sound like WIXI, I'm angry dad.

Anyway, Hey, this has been one hell of an episode, one of our best. Before we go we to ride, we do have to remind people that we do have the competition yep, to win a holiday to Hamilton Island. It's for three nights for the family, two kids to adults to Hamilton Island, staying at the Sunday's New Resort, brand new, hasn't he master yet to be nice, very nice with all the trimmings as well. We won't go into exactly what you get. Look at our Instagram and

How many rounds we're going to do depends how any entries we get we figure it out, but the winner will be announced Saturday, Saturday, Saturday.

But hey, just going to say, just between you and me, the listener, if you have a red hot video, if your.

Kid is if they're doing something stupid right now.

Yeah, if they shave their head, their head, the sibling's head, that's what I want to see. You know. If you think it's deserving of a holiday, just send it to us quickly. Okay, get it to us. We could make the vote off and it has to be good. If it's good enough, we'll slip it in there. That's what she said, because we want to make sure that the most deserving parent or parents get this holiday.

Absolutely, you don't want to miss out on it.

So if you deserve it, let us know. Show us the content now, Ash, my friend, we should get out of here. We should.

If you've enjoyed this episode, please leave us a review five stars, comment me nice, subscribe that would be nice too, and join us on social media. Yes, Facebook, we have a group called two Doting Dads. We need to accept you, which we will screen.

Process is very thorough, very thorough. You've got a first name on the last name. You're in Welcome TikTok Instagram and I think that's everything. That is everything. Good job, well done, huzza. We'll see you guys next week. Let's finish this episode. Finish joke.

Okay, quick joke, this is an original. Okay, did you hear that the guy from Supersized Me died?

No? You do? You know how he died?

Nick colon cancer?

No? Good, that's bad. That's how he died. That's really bad. Thank you. That's what I was going for.

I was thought about it last night when I shry to sleep.

Okay. Two Doting Dance Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.

We pay our respects to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestright Islander peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land