If there was a problem, I'll form it.
Where to your mother?
Here we go at it again. Yeah, one of my favorite cool moms. A. Hi, welcome to cool moms.
I'm Joe Gatto, I'm Steve Burn and we are here to help the world. We are. And by the way, incredible job on the decor. It lavender is that lavender.
It's a fake lavender. It's a favender. It's a favender plant. And I wanted to surprise you with the living room.
It looks very mommy, it looks great.
Yeah, it does look very ered, like when you type in geometric print, like this is the stuff that comes up, you know, in rugs and curtains, whatever you'd like with. This is custom made.
This is custom Now this this we're we're to touch.
Any of it.
We're right, right, right, But the pixelation is just there, yeah, just there, Yeah, on the edge.
We don't want to break the bank, but we wanted to add a little flare.
Yeah why would you? And by the way, after being on this planet for forty plus years, I know that that's finally lavender. I went to a nursery recently my wife and I'm like, oh, that's what that's all the last I get it now.
Lavenda is very versatile. You get it in a candle, yep, you get it in food, yep. You get it in a pink color. You get it in a shirt color. Lavender glow of love is one of my favorite things. Makes these babies pop. When I have a lavender shirt on. Forget it. You can't, You'll have no chock.
It's like you're ready for this. You were ready for I'm.
Ready for every like I hope, I hope. He mentions the lava plant I put in the middle. There was a two plant set up. I struck the second plant and just focused on the lavender. This plate is more. This white plate is in the kitchen.
This is okay, So it still looks nice. You did a great job. How long did it take you to set this up where you're you're going back and forth looking at.
It and you're not going to say, I'm not gonna lie on hands right here on the hips. Our producers helped me out with this. You know, Jiggy went went to work here, he went to town and he was like, you know, I got some good stuff. I believe he's a steam. Did you Steam? Was there steaming steamers was involved. So we didn't want a wrinkled set because who wants that uncle mommies want that. That would be yeah too wrinkle bombs.
It's right, well, which we're getting close to. We're getting very close.
To a wrinkled mom to But uh, you know, I I I do take pride in an esthetic. How do you like, did you do anything when it came to the house or did you hand that off? Nope?
My mom was the least. Like there's moms that decorate and go to like home goods and all that stuff, my mom's not at all. She just it's bare bones. It's like it was like a hodgepodge of things coming together. Yeah, it was like a flea market in our house. It was like schew we But when you're a kid, you don't know any better. They didn't get older. It's like, oh, my mom had no sense of decor my dad didn't either.
They just didn't give a shit, right And now, like my wife is kind of like barely barely at it. So it's like, you know.
In my home, we had in my childhood home, we had wood paneling, of course, because it was a staten island in the eighties and nineties. But we had a tea cart, a gold tea cart, right, which had no purpose other than and a curio cabinet, you know what to carry cabinet clothes. So it's basically a cabinet, glass cabinet that you'd put little figurines in. And my mom loved precious moments. Oh yeah, right, of course we still have all my mom's precious moments and they're all boxed
and saved. And I she we had this r We had this goal tea cart that just its only purpose was to have trinkets on and that got dusty in the living room.
And what's the worst one? It was, there's a creepy.
One, right, There was so many creepy ones. But my dad had gotten like from my grandmother on his side. She had a piano player, but it would look like a Mozart a music box. It was just so creepy ssh and and it was I remember it was cock eyed. It was like painted incorrectly, so it was just like, look at you like this.
So the line was like, what's that cherry? Just off? Oh?
Ship all right, ship them out, Nobody will notice, nobody will notice.
Scarred your child?
I scarred my childhood. The guy used had that creepy thing in the living room. So the curio cart was the curio cabin is where all the PRESI moments lived and I had Chronicles of Christonia. Excuse me, the Chronicles of Christonia.
It was like a shitty like Marvel movie.
It was a Precious Moments with knockoff with dragons. So it was like a mommy dragon and a baby dragon like but for kids, well for you, for weird fourteen year old boys, that was what you were into. I was into it.
You hold on a second. You collected like dragons when you're fortunes.
I used to get them for Christmas and I'd be so excited, this is my newest Chronicles of Christonia. And then I remember the key that I got and I still have them. Yeah, I think I do.
Do you really think that's what you were into at fourteen?
I wasn't very popular, but I.
Mean you, that's usually where you turn the tide with girls and you put the g I Joe's wait hold on no like g I Joe's no he man all.
That stuff growing up. Yeah, but like my he man. My sisters like used my he man as when they lost their ken and like they I would have to play he Man with them, and I would be in Barbie's dream house as he man. I mean like rock They're like nowhere going shopping, right, Like my human would.
Go shopping shirtless, shirtless, firskinos.
He stole Barbie from Cannon my home. Yeah, he's a muscle bound yeah, the muscle bound man. He was like the short and he was so much shorter than barbiing Ken, like you know.
The side he Man was actually a small They did like something recently where they were like if you if you took the like muscle density per the anatomy of him, he would be seven hundred and twenty eight pounds. It was just like rock hard muscle. Yeah, and you are. I think I am probably forty pounds of muscle on top of the one eighty five of just like of not flab resting on top. It's like it's getting to the point where it's like this, could we have abs, we have a situation protected.
They're well protected apps. You under bulletproof, Yeah, layers of kevlar, right, layers of blubb of of blubber that just protect my apps.
Yeah, it's it's uh.
I don't want to show off.
Yeah, why it's like carb carb kevlar, carblock, carbloc.
All right, she wel get out of this.
Let's get into Uh. Let's solve some problems.
Right, let's it. Let's do it for America. Okay, here, we do it for our listeners. Let's just do it for the good of the earth. I'm ready to go. I'm ready to solve some props.
I still like now. I like looking at you, just like picturing you playing with dragons in the bathtub at fourteen.
But no, no, they weren't even toys. They were they were made of like acrylic.
Come on, I'm gonna show you pictures. Okay, this is we're short on time. Here we go. Hey, guys, So I go to a college in a very small town and am very burnt out on it, just not happy. My dream is to move to New York, but I wouldn't even know where to start or if I should go for it. Do you guys have any advice for Makina? I believe that's Makina is right, So I get that right.
Want to change of scenery? Yeah, yeah, I mean that's a big hop though into New York. You gotta you gotta have.
You gotta be careful, yeah, you know, plus like, don't negate the fact that college is the experience. So so as much as you want to jump nick take the nest he plunge and jump in the deep end, you know, I think you do want to first, don't don't negate like the experience that's right in front of you. What is this first?
Did this person mention what they wanted to do with their life?
Is that?
Do they need to be here for?
I think she's just burnt out on the small town small at all and just not happy.
Well, you gotta be careful because you know there's you don't have to jump into the You don't have to jump into the ocean, right right, find yourself a lake if you're in a small town. I mean you could pop into an Atlanta Chicago.
Yeah, don't just play with dungeons and dragons, like, don't just you can't just get a crystal drag.
I see what you're doing, like you, I see what you're doing here, And you know what I was. They were cool the Caryo cabin. I had my own shelf and I used to I used to decorate it. Okay, I used to use empty shoe boxes and decorate. There'd levels.
It's on the carrio.
Okay, Okay, I bought, I bought. I bought her rocks and jets.
I'm fine, I'm supportive.
Doesn't see it doesn't seem like it. It doesn't seem like it.
Ok you want to play with dragons at the age of fourteen when everybody else is getting put in early one of us? That's okay.
Listen, if you are going to come at me without it, I'm going to defend my decision.
Okay, Okay, I got okay, I got it. Okay. So she's in a small town hanging out with das she dreams of crystal dress.
She wants dragon to go. My favorite movie was Never Ending Story at that point?
Was it really?
Or Willow? Those two movies were big ones for me.
Okay, you're really in the fantasy world.
I loved it.
Yeah, I love she So. Little Joe was dreaming of going elsewhere as well.
Little Jojo he wanted to least the big city that he wanted to find himself a magical place known as Narnia. So That's what I'm trying to do.
Yeah, got it? Where? Where was that magical Where was the magical place for you that you escape from?
Well, you know it was enough with getting beat up and not having any friends, so like I would love.
To just she did.
Well, that's what it was.
You know, I'm not afraid you back in the day or were you getting slugged getting slugged? You were getting slugs?
Well not even It was more just like a loneliness said, loneliness, let's que the let's cue the violin music please. I wanted friendship.
You need your.
To escape into the Curryo cabinet. I wanted friendship. No, I no, I get the vibe of like wanting to this right here? Is just always a change of did you move? You never moved.
I moved from Pittsburgh to Kent State, Ohio. So I understand, can't you went to college there? I went to college.
So after college? Where did you move to?
After college? I went to New York?
See, so you did this?
What is your I did this? I My advice would be to don't put the car before the horse. I really would try to enjoy all those firsts that you're doing, like your real first job, your real first, like love, your real first, like great friends, you know, and if you're feeling like you got the itch, then get in a car, take a road trip, go somewhere and make that part of the college experience.
Or and you moved you you did this, you chased I did dream, you wanted to get out and it worked out for you. Yeah, so then why aren't you pro go do it?
I would be but I'd say get get your reps on your health. Correct. Do you ever regret about becoming comic? Every day?
Oh? You're a comic? I think. See that's the thing that you get because you made fun of me with the curio cabinet.
So how does it feel, Stevie? It's a tie game, Okay, I don't want to find We're just two moms.
Were just two moms. We still have to be we still have to go to home goods. I you you did with this. You wanted that bigger field, to chase a dream.
Though the kid gets the itch, you want to go for it and all that stuff. But I just think, don't don't be in a rush. If I could tell myself something early on, That's what I'm getting. Don't be in a rush. Just relax, enjoy this. You know you're gonna have all the time in the world to get ahead of all this stuff, and you're so young right now and and make some you know, makes a mistake.
Makes some mistakes for sure. I think that is a big thing that people don't realize is they put a ticking clock on it. You have time, there might not be tomorrow and all that. Yes, I get all that perspective and all this, but you also don't want to rush at You're talking about a guy who got famous or in his late thirties, you know what I mean. So I think that the rush factor, I don't really, I don't really. It doesn't doesn't sing to me. I don't get that because if I rushed and tried to
do what I did. I think you get funnier as you get older, or you think you get more you need life experience to make you more of the person.
Yeah. And it's like I remember John Lennon saying something along the lines like, you know, London's always going to be there when he came to New York and people like, don't you miss He's like, it's always gonna be there. It's the same thing, like New York City is always going to be here. I understand you want to get into it, but yeah, take a road trip, visit New York. Yeah, hang out, start to explore, get to know it, bring
some friends along, get a friend, go solo. One of my good friends that lives here a very popular comic. He took solo road trips. He'd take his mom's minivan and drive up to Montreal where he drove up to Toronto and really go for day trips by himself. And he was I think he was a senior in high school. Really Colin. Jos just want to Colin. But Colin used to get in his mom's video and just drive up
and have like these solo adventures. And he said they were They were really cool at the time because he was like, fuck, I'm just going to go and explore. And he made like a friend or two and then he'd go back up. And I think that's pretty quiet. I would love to have done that. Like when we were in college, we went in spring break, we went to Toronto. Everybody was going down south, like, let's just do what nobody's doing. Maybe there's a reason for it,
but let's go to Toronto. And we went to Toronto and had the best time, the best time, and it's always what you make of it, right, Just.
Grab some dragons and go north. That's basically the takeover. So I hope that I think the takeaway there is just, yeah, don't be afraid to dabble before you dive in.
Yeah yeah, get a lay of the land a little bit, get your education in because you.
Don't want to come here because it's very overwhelming the city. You don't want to come here and just have shell shock and go. You need to know what you're coming into.
That's the other part of the equation is that there are so many people that think they're ready for it or take the nest. They're just like, I'm in, and then the city has a propensity to kick everybody's ass, everybody's ass. I so many of my friends went from New York to Los Angeles, for example, and they could tough it out in New York, but they couldn't make it through LA And within a year they were always gone.
They always left. And I was just like, I got if I'm going, it's got to be the right time, and I got to know it's gonna suck, but you got to weather the storm because to like live here and you know, to like, come here, pack your bags, come to Manhattan. It's a totally that first year or two, it's brutal beast.
Yeah, they say it's.
Doing everything to get you out of here. It's like all the obstacles are coming at you. You're like, no, you don't belong here.
They say that the six months mark in New York in LA is the hardest part. And I remember five and a half months in being on my rooftop in the rain, listening to the song All the Above by.
Teeth Man, and there's just some things I just wish you wouldn't share with me. I really, I can't even look at you. I'm look at the lavender like.
But I was on the phone with sal My, one of my best friends. I was on the phone with sal and he said, dude, just tough it out, it out, just hanging a little bit longer. And I hung in a little bit longer, and I did it, and then I didn't want to leave, and I and I had a great experience in l A. I think that is there is a point in any any new city where you'll be up there in the rain listening to the t paint. So just you're all the above is McKenna
is what I'm saying. Okay, sorry, next question, wait, moving off there in the rain. I cannot wait.
To listen to the song as soon as the show is over. All of the above by Teapaint is this is this like a you got it kid kind of song, like a sad morosa.
It became no, it became my, It became my. Yeah, it became my theme song.
That was your song? Really? That? So that was a song that got you through. I put the I put the ear pods in. Really everybody needs one of those. You gotta have one. And that's your This is me what I was doing in the rain, walking in Venice, running around the track, right down on olymp off Olympic. Yeah. Can you give me a lyric or two? Okay, here we go. This next one's coming to us from Would you say Sherry or Cherry? I say, I say Sherry Cherry?
Yeh right yeah?
Uh.
What's for dinner? Oh tonight, I'm very excited, says I'm starving. She wants to know what's for dinner.
She wants to know what's for dinner, what's on the what's on the menu for.
You for tonight? I'm very excited for a sushi meal.
Yoh, yeah, she get some sushi.
We're gonna have dinner after this that. I'm always let's get some sushi.
Yeah, it's good. Sushi go wrong in New York.
Now, you know what I might want to do actually, as a noodle, I might I want want to throw it.
Like an Asian noodle like audan. You okay, I could do that. Broth nice and brothy, some broth.
I would love that. I would love that. When I go out to eat, I don't like to go get stuff that I could really cook. I can't do anudan. I tried. Oh my oh god. It was so bad. It was such a it was so chewy. I did like I did it wrong. It was like a hog see. Because pasta's yeah, we all know how to cook. By the way, on the pasta boxes, it always says eight to ten.
It's never eight to ten to ten. It's always like fifteen.
To twenty because you gotta wait till you gotta wait for a heavy boil. And that's the problem. Most people don't. They wait for a boil, a bubble. You need a heavy boil, you need a cauldron, you need to be like a witch's brew up in this shit, and that's when you're dropping for an eight to ten. But most people come for a bubble. You see the bubble.
It's like I'm in now, it's yeah, yeah, So is that really the percent? Yeah?
I find that in my I mean a jiggy. You're a cooker right out here? Is a cooker?
You mean a cook?
No, he's a cooker. You're a cook.
What do you call the dishes? Now, hey, get in there and do your dishwash.
Do your dish wash.
I'm a cooker.
The dish wash would be a cooker.
No, chef's a cook, right, Oh? Is it a chef? A cook? Chef is like more prestige, is that it? Yeah? And then a cook is like you're a chilly.
They don't call it a cook's kiss.
They called a chef's kiss, right, but it was a cook at outback and chili's. I guess that's a no.
No, I would call a cook actually an outdoor a person on the grill as a cook, not a chef. Really, yeah, that's my That's where I make the distinction, I.
Would think because when I worked in restaurants, I was a cook in college restaurants, yeah, puffer belly.
We mean restaurants. You worked at Applebee's, you worked fry cooker, I cook. You're right, I am mistaken semantics. It's a gentle there's a gentle dance that's being done with it.
Well, you're taking the lead, mister gad Okay, I will, I will there, I'll spin around. But is isn't that the best question you could be asked when you're hungry you skip skip lunch. I know it is the best one. You're on the road too, and it's just like, how excited? Oh my god?
What is you? That is one of my favorite texts that I get from you when you and I are on the road.
What are you doing? What are we eating? What are we doing? Let's what's the action.
Let's get into it.
Let's fuck something up.
Where's the nearest buffett chomp?
Oh my god? Could you imagine if there was a pizza hut buffet these days back like the pizza hut we had back in the day compared to the pizza hut we have today is the conveyor belt one. It's the poppa It's like no, no, no, no, no, no, cast iron skille it yes, buttered? Why they fuck it up.
Any The answer to this question is anything for dinner, and you and I are hungry. Yeah, so whatever.
You know what My favorite is to go to a mall and do an all star meal. Do you like those? I love to go. You know what, I'm gonna get a cheese steak. I'll get some.
Give you the big give me it all the way I'm making it. I'm taking laps in this food court. I'm taking. I got heelies on and I'm fucking rolling out. Bang hit me as I'm rolling by. I'm hitting some of the Panda Express. Yeah, I'm taking you know, I'm getting energy from some of the samples, the little two pick chickens. I'm throwing some of them down.
It's always the Asian ones that give you the It's the chicken stir fry. Yes, gonna Dad be there. Then you could go a little uh Marti Gras bourbon chicken.
The one I always skipped that was the juice bar.
Who wants that?
The malt juice bar? And always got time.
But they would have.
The most eclectic displays. They'd be half a pineapple top. I'd be so drawn into it, right and you're like ooh, I need it right, I was so excited.
Were capped off. You got a decision to make at the end. Okay, you got a cinnabond, cinneb What are you doing? You got a cold Stone doing a cotone? What are we gonna do here?
Sometimes Wetzel's knocks on the door. Knock, knock, Come on and come on in Pretzel. I'm gonna I'm gonna knock of a whattel Pretzel. Whatsai pretzel?
That's that's what you go when you first get there. You'd get some laps in. You get a Whatzel pretzel? You think about lunch. I'm always cold Stone before cinnabon.
I'm not an ice cream guy. It's the only dessert I don't enjoy. Wait a second, I'm not. And my kids give me flack about all the time. Dad doesn't like ice cream.
You wosed to give you the dumb piece.
No, no, me, I'm cast iron. You mean the dump purse. I I am a caste iron. I have no problems with what ice creens. I just never liked it.
You can't get into like a carvel saucer ice cream cake?
Is this ice cream cake at a party? Even? Yeah, Fudgie, the whale fudgie, the whale cookie puss, none of them.
You get a saut server Carville. They dump it on top and then they just give you the rainbow sprinkles and oh, come on.
I'm sorry. It's not for me. I don't judge people who enjoy it. It's the same thing with alcohol. If you like yourself a shot of j MO, what you do, go get it. I'm not gonna to judge. I'm gonna have myself with ginger ale and have a great time to So you know what I'm gonna do with a cookie. You know what I do in a cookie place. And I'm sorry, ice cream place. These make your own Sundays. It's a dollar and it's all sort it's all topics. I got a big Captain crunch, I got a wet walnut.
I gotta fight.
I I love me a wet walnut.
You know this is called all the above, all the above.
I'm all the above. There, it's on the topics.
Al right, here we go. This is come to us from Logan. Hey came first off, Love the podcast. Here's my question. My parents want me to follow in the footsteps of my dad and go to college and become successful from there. But I would like to take another route of something I really enjoy. My thinking is that if it doesn't work out by the time I would go to college, then I will go to college and
abide by their wishes. What do you mommies think, we're too mommies that went to school and then pursued or their dreams.
I will say there's something about college that is intangible and helps mould you as a person. And I'll always say that I want my kids to go to college, even though I know it's not for the education. It's for the experience and experience. And I will say this too, I.
Do it sixty forty seventy thirty experience to education. Would you say sixty forty Yeah, I would sixty void because the other thing I took away is I would go and the business aspect of college and understanding business.
Yeah, Like I learned a lot about business. And no matter what you do, you're a business person. You're out there to make money. At the end of the day, no matter what job you're doing, you're doing it to provide to make money. Yeah, so I do love. I never was an accountant, but I use all that I have an accounting degree, but I've used so much business prowess that I learned in college, and I think that was really important.
What was your major accounting?
Oh that's right, okay, ye, so I was an accountant. So yeah, accounter and I was an accounter and I was an account according to you, I I think I learned a lot of like money and how to you know, deal with business, you know, dealings and things of that.
But did you have obviously you had the passion to be artistic? So was that was that more subsided during your college experience? Like it was? It?
Was?
It not even on the radar, Like maybe at some point I'll explore this. But I'm going to college and I'm getting a degree.
I was always a writer. I always loved writing. And here's a perfect example. I used to write people's papers for their finals for twenty five dollars.
Are you serious?
And I made a killing. I made a killing.
Yeah.
My freshman year I wrote two senior thesis for two different people, my sister's friends. Because my sister was a senior, they knew I was a writer. I wrote one about the history of the mafia in Chicago, and I wrote one about anthropology, the evolution of man.
So were these were these subject matters you already had a great background, and now you're doing research.
There was a nerd. So I did research and did them and I made two hundred dollars for each of those. Holy shit, and back in the day, that's that's your yeah, yeah, So I'm making that money. And then there was this there was this one philosophy professor that the final was, you tell me what you're going to write about. And I just did a special where I wrote twenty five I wrote twenty five, twenty five dollars. I wrote the three page paper for twenty five dollars. I would sit
down and bang them out. They were all just thoughts and blah blah blah. And all these people are in the same class, right, And I.
Made a killing where they all get turning in the star.
All time and the same thing. And he never knew, he never knew. Never, it wasn't the same paper. It was different papers. You banged down, banged down, pay. I would sit there, I'd be able to write three minutes, three pages, I'd be able to write out.
But now after like writing screenplays, like are you just like like you look back, you go three pages. Yes, that's fucking nothing. That is absolutely zero.
Three pages is easy.
Yes, now, I mean that's that's crazy. So so to this person, this individual writing in, they have an itch to do something they're passionate about, though, and would I would. I think we're in alignment here. I think you go and get that degree.
Yeah, you can always choose your pasion. On the side, there's only so many hours you have to do for college, like you could still or even work like I was doing the tenderloin stuff after hours. You know, my job. That's why we always laugh about my seven pm coffee because that was my morning coffee, right because I would get off work. That's when I'd be home and be done with work. Sure, and then I would be like,
all right, let's get to work. And I would work from seven to midnight, seven to one on whatever else I was doing, writing, sketch, editing, whatever, And that was my passion. I don't you can live a life of ends, not ors.
I agree with you. I think if you're if you're passionate about something, why not, because either way, in your early twenties, you're gonna be scratching by yep, you're gonna be scratching by no matter where you're at, unless you unless you're the.
Hilton, or if you're going to break out by some chance of stars aligning.
Yeah, so the odds are against you. But I would suggest go to college, filter your passion in your after hours, and then within the next few years you have a degree.
Be a stripper, sure in the after strip or strip?
What do you do? I'm a strip Yeah, because because I think the way he's thinking about it is, why don't I pursue my passion and then I'll go to college if it doesn't work out, It's like I go reverse.
I hate that mindset.
I think you get the degree while you're working on your passion. Now you're ready to go. Now you have a college degree in your back pocket. And let's say you spent four or five years pursuing your passion and you're right on the bubble or whatever. Now you're gonna go to college in your late twenties or early thirties. Whatever. It's like, get it over with, have it in your back pocket. It's not going. Nobody's ever gone to college and been like I'm worse for it.
Yes, here's the money. If you're in a debt, like if you're not into that college, don't go to a big school, don't put yourself sure having it coming out owen hundreds of thousands of dollars. But I will say something, Do you sparked me what you said, which is the mindset is completely off in this message. If I fail at my passion, I'll go do college. No. Right, you shouldn't set off thinking you're gonna fail at your passion.
That's a bad move, that's a bad mindset. In my opinion, what I think you should do is chase your passion while you're doing the thing you don't want to do, to give yourself a base and a safety net. Instead of being like, oh, when I fail, I'll go do it this way. No, that's that shouldn't be how you're thinking.
Yeah, I think the passion is. I think anybody that pursues like stand up or writing, everybody's all in. You see these Broadway performers at lunch, or you go on the subway and you see like the girls getting off at sixty six with their hair and a body. You know, their dancers. None of them are phoning it in now. They're all here grinding it out. That's why again New York City, it'll kick your ass. You're against the best
of the best. So if you're going against you know, if you're going for your passion, you got to go all in. I one hundred percent agree with that.
Okay, all right, look at us, Look at us. Solve a good one, to solve that one. Hope, I hope that helped.
Okay, here we go. This is coming to us from Jordan. Mommy's about five weeks ago. My wife and I were doing it birdie style, and now we're pregnant. By the way, I can't believe. I had no idea that birds like actually had a course.
This is a couple episodes back we realized that birds do have intercourse.
I had no clue. I thought it were just like laying eggs, and that's hey, an idiot. Okay, and I will. We are so excited to be parents and for their journey ahead. I'm type A and my wife is not. I already made it one hundred and thirty pages into what to expect when you're expecting. She'd rather watch Curby Enthusiasm. How could I best support her throughout this pregnancy without being controlling out of love for her and of course the baby's health. Ps. It's a little early and there's
still some risk. You actually are the first people I've told, so thanks for the advice first time parents. If that wasn't clear, I'll follow up in nine months for new advice. Okay from Jordan, Well, first off, congratulations.
Changed completely for the better. Yep.
Here's what I'll say to use Type A. She's a little more relaxed.
Yeah, here's the thing, Jordan, Jordan, if I can, it's over, pal, You'll mean nothing to that child when it's born. She's completely in control of everything that happens, and you are what we call a bystander for the first one year. So your type Type A personality, you can take it and shove it up your ass because there's nothing that you can do right now. So stop reading your book
and start massageing some feet. Yep, and praise that queen because she's going to be taking care of that baby for you, because there is literally like there's nothing a book is going to tell you be like, oh you could what you'll be isn't it an annoyance? And she's already gonna probably be very probably hate you very much for a little while, which is completely acceptable and the way that it happens for a majority of the people and majority of the experience. Okay, and everybody has their
own experience, that's all. Without saying, what I will say to you is you need to be there as you are support team here baby. You are there to help out wash the bottles. Yeah, if she wants something to eat, get it. You know, you really have to follow the lead of the mom because for the first year, that baby needs its mom in a way that the father doesn't. Necessarily, even that kid doesn't need you. If you don't, if you weren't around, kid wouldn't care. This is not It's
honest true. The kid wouldn't be like, where's dad. The kid's like give me that city. I'm hungry. Like hey, that's what I'm saying, you know what I mean, Like it's not for me. That was one of the biggest mind blowing things a parenthood. I was like, Wow, I'm so not needed by this child. Yeah, you needed by the mom to help and used to be a support system. So my advice to you is try to be as much as you could. You support them and give answers Like I see the questions. He's asking like, I need
help with you know, I want a healthy child. What could she eat and stuff like that. You know, work with the pediatrician, remember stuff for her because a lot of it. You know, that baby brains a real thing. Like that's baby a sucking all the nutrients and and genius out of your wife.
It's true. It's you hit it nail, and you hit the nail on the head. I think. You know, you've got to literally be the most supportive you've ever been in your entire life, because she's going to go through mood swings, yep, the chemical imbalances. You know, just like she's gonna love you one second, be crying. The next second you're like, what the fuck did I do? It's like it was shit, Shut the fuck up, you didn't do anything right. You just got to be there for her,
be there for the baby. There's gonna be two individuals crying in that household, yes, on a rotating basis, And you just got to sit there. And you're George Clooney in the perfect storm. You're just like, I've just got a power through it. I'm just got to keep the sales. Suf.
He is growing a human inside of her. Yeah, in case you don't know what's happening, that's bonkers, bonker.
When you see the birth, don't look at don't don't look, don't look, don't don't look down, don't don't, don't don't. It's like you're.
Walking the tight rope. Please do yourself if even don't look down.
Yeah, it's like it's like watching frame one thirty three of the Zubruta film Just you're gonna see you'll never look at Kennedy. You never never look Atkennedy the same.
Don't gonna the baby doesn't do a cute piu bo.
It's my gout. You know, it's.
Destruction, it is How dare you do that to the woman I love? They gotta sew it when it's over. That's a fun fact I found out after we's got to throw a couple of threads in here, because that's the damage that's been done. Don't look down, look at the eyes. Be up here with mommy, Be up here with mommy.
Up do it ever, don't look down. Don't that that should be like there's all those like cute mommy movies, there should be one for daddy's called.
Don't look down own. Yeah, it's you're a tightrope walker, don't look down.
Yeah, And it is the best experience. I think you have so much more respect for the woman giving breath.
And what's the best experience, because none of it's good.
No, no, no, but seeing her like power through just like I don't know, just I've always had respect for my wife.
Of course, we couldn't do that.
When she did that, I was like, holy shit, it's just like a whole other level.
It's like seeing no humans. There'd be none if guys had to do it. No, no, no, we'd be done.
We would just do that.
Before said, you know what, I'm pregnant, I'm done. I would murder myself because there is no way sanity of what happens. They know what was you know, you know whatever, you believe, God, evolution, whatever. They just picked the right people to do it, because women have to do that. Men was no way, not for me, not for this, not for this mommy. This mommy is an adopter, not a shopper.
It's like women and children. First, I'll do that. I'll get you out of the fiuse fire, I'll do all that stuff. I'm working for you in lieu of you doing that. You do that, and I'll do all the like if we're if the boat's sinking and we're on the Titanic.
Like take the door. The door's for you.
I'm a Norwegian cruise line. It's like you guys, go enjoy because what you did, you did that. I got it.
Yeah, remember mee, that's it.
Yeah.
No, I think for him. The real thing here is there is a real reality that you are important, and your importance is in a partnership.
You're facilitator. You're a facilitator. Yeah, you're there to facilitate. You're there to make things as easy as possible for her and for the child. Yeah, but ninety percent of it is going to be for her. She's steering the ship, and you've got to work on her timetable, work on her schedule, and you've got to be as supportive as possible. Those first six months are just crazy, brutal, and no one's going to get sleep. She's not going to get sleep.
You're not going to get sleep the first three months. So just hang in there again, weather the storm, and it's always worth it when you see the baby's for a smile, where the baby's just gripping your pinky. It's like, oh my god, that's the best. The baby looks at you, acknowledges you. It's like that's the fuel. Yeah, that's the energy boost that gets you through the next thing.
I love that baby. You'll meet that baby, that stuff will happen. I honestly didn't like my children for the first year. Excuse me, I didn't like them for the first year. I'm not afraid to say this to people because I feel like people get get railroaded and to believe you can look at that baby, you can be like, oh, everything's great. I look at my kids. I was like, you ruined everything. It's done. You ruined everything. I can't stand you. And I looked at my daughter for that
for the first year. Not resentment, just not that not that feel good lovey thing that people tell you, that lone of like oh you're gonna look like because.
There is a lack of attachment. Sometimes some parents feel at the very initial beginning.
Because I'm not like, not from a selfish but I'm like, you ruined everything for that. But I'm like, look what you did to this woman, Like you wrote like she's an emotional mess right now, I'm like, oh my god, and this for you, like we changed all this, we changed for you, like and you don't even care. You're just like sitting there crying, and it's like you get a little bit of like, wow, I can't.
Believe this room, baby blue, you understand them, right.
But then it's like then there is a turn. There's just a moment like oh my god, this is so amazing, and it happens, but it's not immediate, and you're okay, that's fine, it's okay, doesn't have to be immediate. It happens. Sure, you don't know when it's gonna.
And the one thing I heard over and over and over again. I'm sure you heard it, and I'm sure you probably tell people this too, is that don't shake it fly would say, read the poster reading the hospital, you can't shake it. You're gonna want to shake it, but you can't shake it. Now, what was it? But it does fly by, It flies by so much quicker.
I can't believe how fast it goes.
My daughter's nine already, and there's days I look at her and I'm like, oh my god, she was like that just a minute. And I watch videos constantly on the plane. When I'm on the plane, I always look at videos of my kids and you know them just like the higher pitch, squeakier voice when they're two or three, the excitement of you know, Christmas or Disney or whatever, and now it's just like, wow, she's a little person humans. Yeah,
it fucking goes. So I always was trying to keep aware of that when as the kids are grown older and everything, just like, enjoy it and joy and enjoy it because people always tell you.
I mean, Jordan Peterson says the best I think he says. He says, you have a you have a child for you have a you have a child for four years and then after that they're becoming little people. He's like, for four years? Is that wonder man? And I don't disagree with that time for him. I think that's about right.
Your new friend gdp uh. Should we do one more?
No, you're I think we're gonna tied. Yeah, let's do one more. You can get I We'll do one more. I think I feel like we're doing some good.
This will be a speed round though. Hit. This is coming to us from August. Ty Mommy's and need some relationship advice. I met this guy in my classing is really really cool and we both have feelings for each other. But I'm not ready to be in a relationship. What do I do? He's super sweet and amazing, but I'm not ready for this. August sounds to me like you're a real bitch.
Thanks so much for listening to everybody. We'll catch you guys next week. I've been Joe Gatto. You're not doing that, Okay, I'm Steve Byrn.
She but he's really cool, really sweet. She's not ready to be in the relationship. Nothing wrong with making another friend, Make another friend if it's not right, it's not right, and blossom into what it's going to be. The worst thing to do is to force a relationship. Yes, no one ever wins in that, and you'll regret it. You'll gret it instantly.
Who's defining what this thing has to be? By the way, nobody, nobody. So what you're doing yourself here is like, I would recommend you change your perspective here. I would recommend that you say I'm not ready for a relationship, get rid of that sense completely, and be like, let's spend a day together and see how it goes. And then if I want, at the end of the day spend another day with you, I will. That's what you have to do.
That's that's why you're here. That's why you did it again. You did it again, Joe, because how many times have we heard friends of ours go oh, I hated him when I first met him, and then boom, all of a sudden, they're married.
Start with a day.
That's usually the happiest couples too. The are the ones that's weird that I hated.
Here they get to know each other. Yeah, I think that's real. I think you need to spend a day and at the end of that day, if you want to spend another one, do it.
Don't put the limit on yourself.
That's great advice.
You are a cool mom. Thank you so much doing that.
I you know, I just lived my life and I'm out here mom and as best I can, and you know, I set up and then we just walk into great moving It's a verb.
All right.
Well, we love you guys. Thank you so much for all the great questions. I hope that we helped. I had fun.
You you you always nail it. There's not been one question that that you've answered. I'm like I don't know about that one.
I will say like it was, we started with a comedy podcast, and I think we we found ourselves in like a weird therapeutic thing because I actually enjoy thinking about how I can help these people. But it just ends up being fun because we just like are fun like to talk to each other. We have fun doing that. I don't know how funny this is for people, though, so I think it's enjoyable.
I enjoy doing it. I would listen to this. I know life listens to it. That's all that matters.
I know what I'm saying though, but everybody's listening to it, that's watching this, so thanks. But I hope it's funny me too.
Yeah, I hope you enjoy it. I'm having a black doing it. I'll tell you that much.
Yeah, that's it, all right.
We'll be back next week another episode of Two Cool Moms. Keep the messages coming to us via DM mostly on Instagram. That's where we check them. Joe's on tour, I'm on tour. Sometimes we're together on tour. Jiggi's on tour with us, and we are two cool moms.
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