UNPACKED REALITY - FARMER WANTS A WIFE - FARMER TOM

It's in the news today, but it was actually on TV Reload the podcast last week that night.

Hey guys, welcome back to TV Reload.

I want to thank you for clicking and downloading on these episodes that I've been doing with the Farmer Wants a Wife series. Today we are finishing my interviews with Farmer Tom. This series has been the highest rating series of the show, and whilst I've noticed a lot of the fans talking about the high level of drama and some comparisons to Maps, I actually think it's great that so many people have been tuning in and watching the evolution of these farmers, you know, meet these girls and

He is a third.

Generation cattle and crop farmer with a pragmatic approach to life and a genuine ability to laugh at himself, which I have really enjoyed watching. From running his own contracting business to partnering with his dad on the family farm, Tom's work, ethic and dedication is really second to none, with everyone from Samantha Armaitige the host, to Farmer Burt, one of his close friends, could affirming that he's a bit of an old soul and we really did get

Hey, Tom, how are you good?

How are you?

I'm good, I'm good.

Do you know It's so funny that I've been watching this series for so long and I've just been mistaking where you are, and I've zoomed in now on the maps to find out exactly where you are, and it's starting to make a little bit more sense that you ended up in the Bendigo Gazette.

Yeah, because like our farm we kline of bought it to Bilk in the Gambi. Yeah, so I like my post codes to Builk. But yeah, like if anyone asked, I'd probably say in the Gambi sort of thing.

Yeah right, okay, all right, well that makes a little bit more sense. I'm my whole my partner's whole family. They live in Bendigo, So I spent a bit of time out sort of your way, but yeah, sort of putting a little bit more perspective as to whereabouts your base.

Yeah, yeah, that's best.

How did you get yourself involved in a show like this?

Well, a friend of mine signed me up for the show, or like kind of started the application and then I got contacted to like a casting and then yeah, I was kind of like should I do it? Then I was like, oh, heah, what's the worst that can happen. Then as we got more into it, yeah, I was just like, now this would be good.

Well, you were a fan of the show, Like, I mean, this is what I always think, you know, looking at you on the show up to this point, I'm like, well, you know, I can't imagine you're sitting around watching Farmer Wance a Wife, but maybe it's your favorite show.

I don't know.

Oh well, like if I got home in time, I probably would have put it on and watched it. I've watched a very few of the seasons, Like I've never really watched the whole whole season back to back, But then I've watched plenty of it.

I always think, as well, when you get asked to do a show like this and then it's about to come to crunch time, do you then go back and watch previous seasons? Did you start trying to bone up on you know, how you were.

Going to play this?

Oh? Not really, I'd probably fly. I'm pretty blind, to be honest. I had a bit of an understanding of what how it works and like what sort of to expect. So yeah, and I just kind of went into it.

Was this dating show the best way for you to get out of your comfort zone, because like how long had you been single before taking this show on.

I've probably been single like a year and a half maybe a year sort of thing. And yeah, yeah, like it was good in that sense, like because yeah, like I do work a lot, so like the only real place where i'd kind of meet people either like they work at the same place where I'm kind of working, or yeah, kind of like somewhere where I'm shopping.

And why has it a relationship worked out for you in the past, Like why has your relationships ended when you've been in other with other girls?

There's always been multiple like yeah, like different reasons. Like one the one that was probably the closest to going to work out, like it was a fair age gap, and yeah, there was like that just kind of yeah, like I was still quite young, so I was like we'll both just kind of like, yeah, this probably is going to work out a few others, like because I've worked a lot, they might want me to do things that I just kind of can't at that time year, and that always makes things challenging.

Some years, you know, a few scandals fall off the wagon. You know, during and after the show. Were you worried about putting yourself on national television and having people scrutinize your life?

Oh, like, I'm not that worried about that. Like anything anything that I've done, I'll just own it and be like, yeah, whatever had happened, Like there's no point yeah, kind of like trying to deny it. Like if it happened, it happened. You just try and grow as a person and do better. But no, like, yeah, I wasn't that worried about it. Like you've just kind of got a hope that no one kind of makes anything up that's not true.

Yeah, which people can do. I mean, people feel relevant both like they have information. So sometimes you know, people have this need to say something that maybe they think is true but isn't true, you know what I mean, just to make themselves feel heard.

Oh yeah, definitely. And lies always travel faster than the.

Truth, so it's usually a little bit more exciting. Yeah, usually, yeah, a little bit more scandalous.

Yeah, the truth can be quite worrying sometimes He's twenty.

Two years old too young to be getting married, well, like, and I kind.

Of like, yeah, plenty of people have said that, like, we don't get it's like we actually get married at the end of the show, like that's obviously the long term plan. But no, like, I still wouldn't say it's too young. Like, I know plenty of successful relationships that have got together at like nineteen twenty and if you go back forty fifty years and like a bit further, that's when they were getting together, Like they're married by eight a nineteen.

I guess I was sort of curious about these getting married at a younger age still a thing in Central Victoria.

I like, it's probably not the most common thing, but yeah, it's like anything, if you're going to Yeah, if you're open to it and going to make it work, I don't see why it can't happen. So as long as the kind of maturity levels there with both parties, they're like, I don't see the difference in the age sort of thing.

Well, the other farmers and Samantha have been telling me each week that you're a bit of an old soul. I think that they think that you're not really this twenty two year old guy who hasn't got his shit together an actual fact, you're a bit like a thirty year old bloke in a twenty two year old's body. Is there any truth or how do you resonate with that?

Yeah, it's probably true, and like really like normally when I kind of go and just getting around doing whatever, like everyone thinks I'm kind of like twenty seven kind of thirty two anyway, So yeah, I don't know, And all my friends are a lot older, like I wouldn't have any friends in my own age really, like they'd probably vary from like twenty seven to forty five sort of things.

So, well, what's your relationship like with Farmer Burt? Because when I spoke to him, I said, you know, how's it all going, how's the ladies and what's it like with the other farmers? And he quickly circled, you know and singled you out and said how much he's really enjoyed having you there and going through this show together. What's what's the story there? What's the relationship between you and farmer Bird? Like, how have you connected?

Yeah? No, we get along really well, Like I don't know, kind of from the get go. We got on very well and like, yeah, I don't know, we probably talk on the phone every second day or something like now that it's kind of like the show is obviously over now and yeah, like yeah, I flew up and saw him a couple of weeks, probably a month or two ago now, yeah, and we talk a fair bit. Yeah, I don't know, just kind of sometimes and you click with someone, you get along super quick.

And I guess it's easy now because you both can watch the show and now you can put a face to some of the names, because I'm assuming if you were talking through filming, you probably would have been talking about the ladies that were on your farm.

And then now you get to sort of see how it all.

Unfolded exactly, and like I kind of knew, yeah, like we did. I've got to meet most of his girls. Like the first one that went home, I didn't get to meet her, Like I probably met her once, but you know, like not enough to actually get to know her.

Yeah, true.

And then the second one I don't really remember her. But then the last like three that he had, like yeah, like I got to know them quite well, Like, yeah, they're all pretty good, good people. So no, it's interesting to see like kind of like he'd be like, oh, yeah, this happened, and you kind of can't really know exactly what happened, but no, it's good to be able to see it and kind of get some context of what we were talking about.

I kind of feel like with you that they did a good job of picking these girls, like some of the sets of girls to some of the farmers, I'm a little bit like, oh, I don't know, but I just thought, you know, they did a pretty good job of being able to I guess find out what you were interested in in a partner and finding them. What did you think of all of these women that were picked for you?

Obviously, when you're trying to pick a partner for someone that you don't know, it's never going to be an easy job. But no, like they all did. Yeah, Like they're all very nice ladies and very respectful and time. So yeah, you probably couldn't have asked for a better group of girls in that way, that's for sure. They got along really well.

Well.

That's the thing is, like, what's going to happen if these girls are all going to remain friends and you pick one of them? Are you going to be being well, this is a little bit awkward when you know she wants to go off and hang out with some of the other girls that you've probably made out with on the farm.

Oh, I like, yeah, probably wouldn't have been like it's probably not ideal, but you know, like all the girls kind of left well enough that you could, Yeah, it wouldn't be a drama, like, yeah, I don't yeah, I can't see that ever been a problem, to be honest.

How did you go sending them home? You know, sending some of these girls home? Was that stressful for you?

Yeah, it definitely was an ideal because but you do kind of still care about the person. Yeah, kind of it's a hard situation because it's not like, yeah, like it hasn't come to like a natural ending. You've kind of just got to make that decision and stick with it. Yeah, it definitely wasn't easy, and you know, like some took it very well and just kind of like thanks for letting us, like thanks for having a go and that

I just kept thinking about some of those dinners where you're all sitting there eating before you're about to send someone home. Are they as awkward in real life as they come across on screen?

I think it's probably worth Yeah, it probably works because like they do take a long time because you kind of talk to each girl individually, so like, yeah, by the time you've kind of spoken to everyone and you've all sat there and like you know, like you obviously have to set up and that sort of thing, Like you've been there for a fair few hours, and yeah it is by the end of it. Yeah, you've been there for a long time, and it's quite awkward.

Did you always know who you were sending home throughout those dinners? Like you left it up to the last minute to make a decision, or were you in sort of sitting there at the table trying to cover it up, you know, so that it would work for television and keep audiences guessing, like you kind.

Of you don't always know you're obviously sitting there, you have like your talk with everyone and then you know kind of make your decision, like you might have had an idea beforehand, but yeah, like you know, anything can change in that sort of situation, Like probably just leave it a bit open until you've done what you had to do.

Do you think that they knew? I'm always curious as to whether or not they're still sitting there thinking it's hope it's not me, or do you reckon that they've got a pretty clear idea.

Yeah, I don't actually know, because, like obviously I never really went into that with them. They might think, oh, maybe it's me, and probably hopeful that it's not. That they're probably all in the same situation, like probably thinking because like obviously, most of the interactions are done on the dates you go on when you're on your own.

I love it on reality TV as well that you were whispering goodbye it's Sarah A. But it's all on camera. So, like I was wondering, when you're whispering to the girls at times, is that because you don't want the other women to know, or are you hoping that whispering doesn't get picked up on the camera. What's it like filming the show? Do you sort of forget at times that you're always miked up?

No, I know you kind of know that you're always miked up. And yeah, like if it was said quietly, it probably was just to kind of like fit the conversation that was happening. Yeah, Like nothing was there, Like I didn't do anything differently because it was cameras there, Like, yeah, it would have just been done quietly because yeah, kind of how that mood was.

You know, you were giving her some serious reassurance and I think, you know, maybe you were just trying to keep it down because the girls out the back would be like, well, why is he sending her home? But like it was a nice thing to do. I think it was sort of, you know, more gentlemanly to sort of say good on you, you'll find love and sorry it hasn't worked out, do you know what I mean.

Yeah, Like she's a lovely girl, Like she was very good, like always very happy, buddly. Yeah, you probably couldn't have asked for more of a nice person. I always wanted to do the right thing by her, that's for sure.

Now, what was the age difference between you and Chrissy. Was there a bigger age difference there?

Oh, there is a bit, but I couldn't tell you exactly what it is because she.

Was a bit older, right, so like I think she was like yeah, so I'd say.

Yeah, I think she's twenty nine. I mean, hit it you hit it off with Chrissy. But that age gap seemed, you know, it seems like it's quite big in comparison. I mean, in you're twenty two and she's twenty nine. Does that makes me want to ask you this question? Do you go for older women usually?

I probably would. Yeah. Yeah, Like I'd nearly always go for an older, older girl. That's not to say that I wouldn't go if someone was younger or my own age. That's just kind of and it's probably more to do with how I've met people too.

True.

They're kind of at that career stage. They've been to university, they've studied, they've done all that sort of thing. So yeah, by the time they're kind of in the career where I'll meet them, they're kind of at that thirty years old twenty five. Well, it's probably more of the rate not gone for older people. And yeah, just kind of like the conversations we can have just to match that.

I think maybe with you being a bit of an old soul, that you probably a little bit more suited to being with an older woman. I think that's probably a better match because you yourself seem to be a little bit wiser than your age.

Yeah, no, I agree.

And then the baby talk is something that really needed to be taken into consideration. Do you think that Chrissy might be wanting kids sooner and that might be a bit of a decision maker for you?

Oh, Like, it's always something to think about, that's for sure. Like, yeah, like John, you obviously can't have children forever. It's definitely something you have to weigh into your decision. Yeah, like the conversation about having children was always going to have to happen.

And why is it that you don't want children at this age? Are you planning them to have them in your thirties or what's the decision there with wanting to hold off on that?

Oh like yeah, and like obviously i'd want to be with the person that I was considering having them with for a fair while, Like you want a good understanding of exactly who someone is and yeah, like, yeah, you don't want to have children with the wrong person, that's for sure.

And then you've got Sarah C who's from Western Australia. Do you think that that might be too much of a move, like their families so much further away. Is the fact that Sarah Ce is from a you know, a state so far away?

Is that going to play into your decision making?

Yeah? I would say that definitely will play into making the decision. Like, yeah, like it's a four or five hour flight or something like that, and like I'm still an hour and a half from the airport, so it turns it into a whole day sort of thing, just trying to get there or get back or yeah, and like obviously being so far from your family is never

Well, we get to see you introducing these girls to your family and friends, and you can see that family is important to you. What was your family's honest opinion? Did they seem to have a collective thought on one of the girls over the other oh, like I think.

It was a bit of a split decision. Like, yeah, like my family did have a bit like it was a bit of a split decision. Like one of my friends that was there, she said that she thought Chrissy would be a better match, and then like, kind, I think my little brother agreed with her, And then like my mother and father probably thought Sarah might be a better fit. Yeah, it was a bit of a split decision, but they said, you know, like both would probably be

Yeah, I think as well, like when you're with your friends, you've got like a bit of bravado. I mean, you can be quite close and they might have a better insight and some you know, compared to some friends friendship circles. But I guess your family always knows, you know, the most sensitive, the more real side to you at home, and would understand a companionship then how that might work out better than say, your friends exactly. Some may say that you've had a lot less drama on your farm.

Things on my farm were pretty smooth, Like all the girls got along really well, Like there wasn't much drama at all, So like I was probably lucky in that sense. And yeah, like obviously us blokes were catching up when we go to an event and talk about what have been going on, and now I'll just have to kind of say, yeah, I'm trying to get away with this pretty easily. But yeah, they definitely did have a lot more drama than what I had.

Well, Farmer Bert, you know, from my opinion, it looks like he is the most confused. Maybe too many pineapples in play on his farm, I think.

Yeah, Bert definitely had plenty on his hand. It probably had a lot more to do with their age too as well. Like I give you kind of put five very headstrong, superint like quite intelligent women together. It's not unheard of to have issues. Like I kind of expected it, like I probably expected more drama than what I got to be just kind of going into the experience. I was just kind of like, yeah, I was kind of mentally prepared for quite a bit of drama, but no,

What was the most stressful situation for you, Like, what was that the highest point of drama whilst you were picking between these women?

Well, they kind of wasn't really any like we'd come back from a date, and like obviously in seasons gone by, like you kind of see there like like an interrogation when you get back, but like they didn't do it, and I was I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, right, this is yeah, Like I was almost shocked that they weren't like that in some ways.

But that's why I was saying to you before I really did see that they did a great job. I mean, some of Wants a Wife is, in my opinion at this point, the best dating show that you could possibly be on, because it seems like there's a little bit more care in finding the right people, Like it's less about you know, stunt pasting and getting some girl that's going to turn up like Ursula from The Little Mermaid

Yeah, yeah, I agree, Yeah, And like it's probably also the situation. Sometimes people will react differently to it, like yeah, like some people are going to get very fiery, and then you get some people that are just very easy going. So even like some birds girls, like there might have been plenty of drama there, but like I think I'm pretty sure they're still friends now. And like they were awesome, awesome girls, like great to get along with, great fun.

Farmer Joe, I reckon at the moment, he's got some he's got a few cats on the fence that I'd probably hose off, but you know, he seems to be pretty clever of being able to work out what to do.

Yeah, Like Joe definitely had some very strong personalities, like that's for sure. And yeah, like I got to know some of his girls quite well, but not not all of them. Yeah, but like most of them. Yeah, everyone that was there was pretty genuine. Yeah, you probably couldn't have complained. It's not like there was anyone there that was just a horrible person, that's for sure.

What about Todd do you know do you think because he's come in later replacing a different farmer, do you think it's harder for him having to try and pick these girls a little bit quicker?

Yeah, in some ways. But like I think, if you know, you've got a set period of time, you just kind of have to get into it, get to know them really well, and I think you can make that sort of decision pretty quick. Like you know, like, obviously it may not work out long term, and everyone's got to be aware of that, But I think when you meet people like that, you can kind of get a pretty good idea of who you want to be with and like who's going to be the best fit for you.

So well, I guess at that stage, you know, you guys were still working out how to do it. And it's also different for each farm. You know, it's a different set of girls, it's a different set of situations. So there's only so much that you'd be able to tell them that, you know, producers wouldn't have been able to try to help you guys out with at the start anyway.

Yeah, exactly, And like what happened was like he showed up and then that said something like, oh, have you got any advice for him? And I think I said something like a couple we went in blind, so so can you savage? But like you seem like straight off the bat, you could kind of tell that you had a bit of a sense of humor and could kind of take it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, kind of you can.

Yeah, yeah, we didn't really hold back. Yeah.

Well, clearly the cat is out of the bag and you've you've picked Sarah C. So congratulations. I think that's an amazing match for you. How did you go keeping that a secret? I mean, how do you go keeping that from the locals.

I like kind of just kind of yeah, like not been out in public too much and yeah, just kind of like like it's kind of my busiest time of the year at the moment anyway, So I can't say I've been like out and about to be honest. So yeah, just kind of like doing what I have to do, working, go home, go.

To bed, candlelight dinners at home.

Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. Obviously some people might have been something around town and they might have a bit of an idea, but that's always going to happen, and when you're it would.

So what is something from behind the scenes, something that you know, people who are watching this show might not necessarily know, you know, kind of like a behind the scene secret as to being a farmer and farmer wants a wife. What's what's something that surprised you through production?

Oh, you don't get much work done? Yeah, Now apart from that, I don't really know. Yeah, Like it's all like, yeah, like a lot of people go as a filmed on your place, and like all the stuff that's done on the farm is on our farm.

Now you're watching it and thinking, wow, they actually make my place look really good.

Yeah, in some ways. Yeah, it comes up right on camera because I don't really take many pictures.

Like once the girls go home, do you ever see them again or do they quickly put them in a car and hustle them away?

Like what happens with that? Like do you ever speak to them or hear from them ever again?

Oh? We like you could you could obviously message or whatever like find them that way, but like on the show, like as soon as you've sent him home and they get in that car, that there, they don't come back.

You know, Tom, I think that you've had the most authentic journey on this show and I've really loved watching your story unfold. I wish you and Sarah see all of the best and I can't wait to catch up with you and see you two at the reunion. And like the rest of Australia who have been watching this show, I think we're just keen to see how your relationship evolves.

All right, no, thank you,