Have you ever gone to like a silent retreat?
Yeah, I've been to lots of silent retreat have you no fucking way? Well, I'm just it's such a first of all, I don't even believe in yoga. Let me just say that, So.
You're not ever gonna go to a yoga retreat.
Those things are dumb. Those and there's always like two celebrities walking around that everybody talks about. Can you believe so and so is there the whole time? He's so wonderful? What shut the fuck up?
Kashaw Cash Show.
Welcome to another episode of Tosh show Man. I'm just churning these things out lately. Eddie. How are you today? Doing great? Good good, good, good, good good. I'm excited. Ask me why I'm excited, Eddie? What are you excited? Daniel? Because my family is gone, my wife's family, my in laws were in town visiting, and that's always nice when they leave. Here's let me give you a great hack if if you're in a position where you can afford this, I always pay for my in laws travel. I book
it that way. There's no oh cause you tell people like, oh, you're gonna come out for four days and it's like, oh yeah, well we decided. We decided it was cheaper. We saved eighty dollars if we stay for a month. It's like no, no. I booked their travel and I book them on a direct flight Tampa to la and then then I put them on the direct flight home. I always put them on a nicer seat on the way out. You want, you want their their energy and their mood to be good when they get here, because
lord knows, I got six days to go on. I'd say the time zone. I mean, there's a I have a few complaints. Hey, I'll tell you another thing that was insane that happened my father in law. I walk out to the living room and he's just sitting there and I'm like, hey, you're you're sitting on a throw pillow like there's like it's just a couch with a couple throw pillows in the corners, and he had one down flat and was sitting not not like kind of half like just flat out sitting on a th That's insane,
right in booster cushion. Well, that's funny you say that. That's funny you say a booster because he is a short man, so maybe he was doing it to give himself a little lift. All I know is that's what I nap on. And now I've got pink eye, but I do nap on it. Like don't you don't fucking sit on someone's throw pillows. That's crazy, right behavior. No, you don't know anything about. Now. I'm just gonna go to a list of things they do that bother me,
her family, every last one of them. I always like secretly give her eye contact to point it out because she does it too. They don't push in chairs ever. They get up from a chair, they've moved a chair, they never put it back where it was. Here's the thing I have OCD. You know, I'm very organized. I like things clean clean, I like things in their place. I also don't like saying thank you, so I'd rather people not do things for me, just so I don't
have to say thank you. That's I know, that's on me. That's insane. I've got a lot of issues, but they are, Hey, we're gonna Can we do the dishes? Can we help clean up? No? I don't want to spend the next two weeks trying to find wherever the fuck you put my stuff? Was like, oh, we just want to be easy. No, you don't. I don't want to be easy. Just tell me what you want to eat and I'll make it appear. And don't say, oh, we just want to hang we'll just hang out. You're not gonna just hang out. Let's
do something. Let's go somewhere. The amount of times that is walk in and see four of them just staring at their phones on my couch, it's infuriating. I don't even know who they're texting. They're all people that they know were in the room. Do we have any videos this week? Yeah, we do have a video. Oh all right, play that. This video is brought to you by Chipotle. I can't imagine Chipotle would sponsor us, but for real, if you want to play that video game, stand or not.
This is very common on the Venice boardwalk. I remember the first time I saw someone shitting on the street in La I was like when I moved out here, I was like, Oh, this place is great. Today's guest is a mental health expert. Mental health is so in right now. It's definitely what the cool kids are talking about and something our parents never did, like global warming and eating ass. That funny how we just openly about
eating ass and all. That's such a difference. Comedians, for the most part, aren't exactly known for their mental health, which I'm okay with. I don't meditate either. I don't want to be alone with my thoughts. I get furious if I go to the bathroom and I forgot my phone. Why do I want to talk to a wellness guru when I like being grumpy? Because she has the greatest voice.
Enjoy Pasha all right, if you're a person with crippling anxiety, then you will recognize the soothing voice of today's guest.
She's my favorite mental wellness coach, even though I've never used one. Please welcome Rosie. I didn't wear shoes for you today because I felt like that was oh good.
Oh you thought it was going to come.
You know.
I love when I assume you're going to come here, just be like totally zen and like soft spoken.
I think in general, you're gonna have to just be to me like I'm an idiot the whole time. If I were just like to meet you and say, what do you do for a living, how would you describe it?
I'm an author, so I'm a writer.
I teach mindfulness and meditation, and I teach yoga and I'm a wellness coach. Basically my world is encompassed by this intention that I have to empower people to become well.
Do you ever blow up in a rage and like yeah, like yell and oh of course, Okay, I don't know if you're like it's always peaceful? Well, I know, but I didn't know. I didn't know if your wellness trumped your roots.
Oh no, it doesn't. I still that you still are still in there. Just because I'm polysyllabic doesn't mean that I don't get hood.
I don't. I don't even use the term hood. How much does Headspace pay you?
Oh?
I mean did you start out rocking there? No?
No, no, no, I I just started with them.
I've only been at Headspace for about a year, but I was doing my own stuff prior to that, and.
Then they came calling to you. Do you have a different voice that you for when you're I don't like on the app?
No.
You know what's interesting is that I don't.
And I think that that's why a lot of my students like to do my practices, because I don't change into Okay, now we're going to although that some people might like that.
I do. I like that. I'd like you to come over to read to my kids at night.
Oh that would be nice, and I'd love to do that. I've done that before for my students, because you.
Just call people your students, anyone that listens to you.
Well, there's specific students that have been practicing with me for many years. But I would just say, my friends, I think everybody's my your students.
How much do they and then they just pay you?
Uh yeah?
For many years? They can't There's no end.
There's no end to it. I mean there is an end.
There is a point where I graduate them and they move on or forward with all the tools because I mean truly, you hire a coach for a short amount of time, right because if your coaches doing their job, then they will empower you to learn what you need to learn and then you can move on if somebody hires or if you hire somebody and they're like, oh, we're gonna be working together for the next decade.
Man, decades not that long. If you if I knew you could fix me in a decade, I'd give it a shot. But I don't think you could. So I'm not going to start the exercise.
There's actually this book that one of my mentors wrote. His name Stephen Cautler.
I don't know. You may or may not have heard of him.
I've never heard of him.
He has a book called nar Country that he just wrote, and it's all about the longevity of aging and how you can in fact teach an old Doug new trick.
So and that's like scientific a.
Whole book just to say that book, just to say that. Turner, do you ever meditate to recordings of your own voice?
No, I don't like to listen to the sound of my voice.
This is the first question I asked every guest. Okay, do you believe in ghosts?
I don't know.
It's like I have two sides of my brain that one side can believe something or see something that's kind of unexplainable, and then the other side that's like there's no possible way that that is.
Could you give me one example of something that you've seen that's unexplainable.
Okay, I'll tell you a quick story.
Okay, So when my boyfriend and I first started dating, there was a lot of weird things happening around the house. You know, like just very strange lights turning off that kind of thing, which okay, you can explain away. But there was this one incident that happened. We were sitting across from each other. We were in the tub, We're taking a bath.
I know, it's fine.
We had We're sitting across from each other, and he was drinking a glass of wine and as we were talking, I see this like misty shadow hand kind of reach across his face and I saw the fingertips of this like misty dark hand grab the top of the wine like that, and then you just hear crack, crack, crack, and then he grabs the wine glass and he picks it up and reaches for the top of the rim of the glass and just pulls it off like it was laser cut off of the wine glass.
I have pictures of this I can show.
You because I've told everybody the story to try and debunk it.
Like, how did that happen?
I hear, I mean, if you want me to, it didn't happen.
Your nuts, I imagined the whole thing.
Okay, I mean, you buy shitty wine glasses could be another I think true. Maybe are you like an amazing happy person outside of your work.
This is a great question, by the way, because I always think it's funny when people just assume that because somebody's job is to teach people how to be more present, that they're like the most present people have no problems, are so not reactive, And for me, it's the complete opposite.
You're a man.
Oh yeah, I do what I do because of how big of a mess I am.
Huh, yeah, I don't want to hear that at all. Do you meditate every day for yourself?
Of course? Yeah?
Okay, Well, I mean I assumed, but I didn't.
Yeah, I do.
And how long?
Typically like forty five minutes to an hour for you?
Oh my goodness, that's insanity.
Is that too long or too short?
No?
Really, it's so crazy.
Tell me what the resistance is, because we were just talking about this.
I mean, do you know that meditation.
Is good for you? I'm going to say yes, I know that. Okay, I'm going to say that everything that you probably think I should do, I know I should do, and I completely refuse it. Okay, Well, my son is in preschool and they have reiki once a week, they have meditation every day, and I just laugh and they send me videos of my my son holding crystals and like just peacefully sitting there and like having good thoughts and and it's just the sweetest thing I've ever can
bring me to tears every time I watch it. It's just the cutest And I just think about like the childhood I had, you know, which was my dad like saying, hey, go grab the ping pong paddle, I'm going to spank you right now. Like just very different.
Yeah, very different.
My sense is as you're talking about your son holding the crystals and like in the state that you think it's silly. It's silly, but you also think it's sweet. But also for you you can't imagine yourself doing never do that.
Have you ever tried it? Yeah, and tell me what happened.
I don't think. I think it was just like I started day dreaming or I fell asleep.
But what happens? Why the resistance to meditation?
I'm just kidding. I would just rather watch something on TV.
Like what happens in your mind when you're sitting there.
I don't. I don't. First of all, I don't. It's not tribal. Yes, okay, for how long is long until I'm yelled at to do something.
How long is that?
I don't know. I mean, it depends on some of the hide I go places, just so that nobody in the family knows where I'm at, what.
Happens in your Are you? What are you doing when you're hiding.
Trying to sleep?
Sy's but are you? But that could be a meditation.
As long as sleeping is considered meditation. I love it.
I think that naps are considered.
What do you think of crystals? Just the dumbest thing in the world.
I'm kind of on the fence because I I almost feel like they're It's like the placebo effect, you know. I mean, some people really believe that they can harness energy from you.
You people are dumb. I mean, there's two crystal shops near my house. Oh I two. I have somebody that represents me. I'm not going to say who, all right, but they They've worked closely with me in my career for over twenty seven years. They're a witch first of all. Okay, when I go on tour, they'll like ram a chicken foot in my pocket or something like that. They always like give me money, trees as gifts and things like that.
Oh, that's fun.
Just just every bit of it nonsense.
But you don't buy any of it.
No, But I don't ever want to, you know, persuade this person.
Okay, so you're doing it for them, you're not doing it for yourself.
No, But what if it's been working.
Right, No, anything great, then I reap the benefits of it. Right.
So that's the way I see it. That's the way I see a lot.
Of this, you know, like reiki healing or crystals. It's it's what you believe, you know. I'm look, I was raised Catholic, right, so for me, there are certain things that like I wouldn't mess with, you know, like I'm not going to go play Oige Award or.
Something because you don't want to go to hell.
Well, no, because I don't want a demon attached to me.
I like it all. I'm fascinated by it all, okay, But but this is what I personally. I like. I like spa music, okay, I like essential oils Okay, smell that stuff. And I like I like massages. That's and that's a.
Really great But that's a good meditation practice for you.
That's really good, you know, because it Why do you like to why do you like to get a massage?
Because I'm going to tell you why I like to get massages. It's the only time I can have a woman that's not my wife touched me. So that's that's exciting. I only like to have females massage me. Oh no, I've never once in my life been aroused from a massage.
Oh, you know, I've always wondered that about men.
People always say that guys. I go, they touch close and bob and you get excited and you It's never happened in my life. I've never been sexually turned on from a massage. Yet I don't want a man to rub me.
Interesting?
What about this this world overlaps with uh, speaking of sex? It does kind of people. Yeah, did you do you use this fun? Do you do that stuff too? Or believe that tan trick all that stuff? Oh where they like don't touch you.
Yeah, I've yeah.
I have, I've work, right, I mean, it's nice, it is nice.
Have you never with your wife?
You know?
The thing is it's like we're so conditioned in our society to just like yep mm hmm, and that's it, you know, And I think it takes a lot more for, especially for women to feel aroused.
What vibrators are for.
Continue, But that's so not like, you know, do you want to rely on a battery operated device every time?
Our is the solar?
But oh so it lasts a really long time.
Well, as long as she's out in the backyard. Where are you from?
I grew up in East l A. Yeah, I grew up in East La. Beat yeah now itays right?
Know anything about it? Well, it's amazing. No, I can't imagine it is. I don't know.
You know.
It's one of those things where it's like when you're a kid and you hear the songs about Compton and stuff like that, you're like, well, I'm never going to go there. When you're like this, like white kid from the suburbs in Florida.
Yeah, probably not a great place to go.
You don't live in East LA anymore.
I don't. I'm in the valley now.
Look at that, I know. Is that what you always dreamed of?
Actually it's the place that I said I would never ever move to.
If you're from LA. The valley's like the epitome of selling now yeah.
Selling out suburbias, you know, but it's not it's safe you know, it's just nobody wants.
To go there.
You don't want safe, No, I want to live in fear.
Did you live in fear as a kid?
I did?
Yeah.
Well, I grew up in the early nineties, you know, during what is called the Decade of Death. I lived in a like apartment complex that sat right in the middle of two rivaling gangs. So we were always kind of caught in the middle of drive by shootings and gang violence and fights. But the interesting thing about that is growing up in that kind of environment, you're growing up around other kids that are also experiencing the same.
Type of I guess PTSD you would call it.
Do you really try to steal a cop car when you're fifteen years old?
I did. I did attempt it.
Yeah.
How far did you get?
I didn't go anywhere.
Do you get in the car? Yes? Do you close the door?
Yes?
Turned the key it was already on. Okay. Did you call in No?
I just I just put it in reverse and then the cops pulled up behind and I just put it back in park and I got out, So I didn't drive away with it.
Do you arrested?
Of course I got arrested.
Oh really? I went to jail, to jail for that, you could. I didn't go to jail.
I didn't go like, I wasn't there for a long time. I got arrested and I.
Got booked, right, Yeah, you weren't. You didn't try to get like cute your way out of it.
Oh yeah, they were not having any of it. And then when I got booked, the booking guy that was there, he's like entering my information and he just looked at me and he was like, welcome to life in the system.
And I was like, oh, Jesus, I will cut you.
Okay, and Jesus back to you now, both of you doing your part. Do you have childhood friends that you're still close with?
Yeah, I do a.
Couple because you have to. Well, yeah, I'm scared they're going to come after me. And then some family members you just can't get rid of.
And I think that's more of a cultural thing. Yeah, I'm happy to get rid of family members.
That's a good boundary to have.
Oh as soon as I like see the way they vote on a few issues, I'm like, you're out.
How do you do? Really you do? Did you grow up being close with your family though?
No, I don't know they were great. I had an easy childhood, I had fun. I enjoyed most stages of my life. I've never looked back on my life and like that was the best time of my life. Okay, I've always.
Been like no, like you're good with it, you can move on.
I feel like I'm living in the now at all times.
That's good. You're being present.
Maybe that's why you don't need to meditate or you feel like you don't. I don't have you ever gone to like a silent retreat.
Yeah, I've been to lots of silent retreat have you no fucking way. Well, I'm just it's such a first of all, I don't even believe in yoga. Let me just say that. It's like it's all not like go home and stretch.
But doesn't it feel it's hot?
Yogat? Oh good, Okay, we're gonna We're gonna all sweat. I'm gonna smell you. And then there's like two guys in the class because they want people to look at the silhouette their dong. I don't like them either. I don't know why they're there.
So you're not ever gonna go to a yoga retreat.
No, No, those things are dumb. Those and there's always like two celebrities walking around that everybody talks about. Can you believe so and so is there the whole time? He's so wonderful. Shut the fuck up. We didn't talk for six days. Oh lovely, she just send that money to Ukraine? Assholes? Sorry?
Sorry, not sorry.
So I've never been a retreat? Was the.
You should go to one?
What happens in your brain when you're sitting there and not thinking thinking? Can you get your mind to just be quiet?
Sure? Yeah, yeah, I'm not like like sometimes I'll wake up in my wife like, oh I couldn't get to sleep my I just kept thinking a thousand things and I'm like, what do you stop? And then I just roll back over and fall asleep in our six hours.
That's good? Yeah, yeah, I'm kind of jealous.
See I think that's what someone should say to me. Yeah, like, hey, you know what you're You're in the right space. Yeah, that's good, you're not you don't need to do any of this stuff. You don't need to. I'm not saying no, I know you're not saying that, but that's what I want someone.
Oh you want someone to say, I'm not going to say that to you, but I will say that I'm jealous that you can do that, because that's ultimately the goal.
That's well, well, that's the you know, one time I despise acting as a perfe It's nothing I've ever been interested in. One time, you move out here as a comedian, You're chasing your dreams living in California, and it's so exciting. They want you to audition, and it's humiliating the audition it is. Of course. One time I was like, oh, I really would this would be a good part, and my manager was like, well, I hired an acting coach
for you, and I'm like, oh, that sounds horrible. And then I did it with this acting coach and the acting coach told me after like we did like our read through. He's like that's perfect. And I was like, well, then I'll never ever hire you again. And also I didn't get the part, and I've never been a good actor, but you know, that's all I All I needed was one person to tell me, oh, no, that was you did it good. That was good. And then I was like, well then this is stupid.
That was it, And that's all the reassurance you needed.
To know that I that this is silly.
You don't like acting at all.
No, But in fairness, I really don't like comedy either. Well, it's because it's it's embarrassing to me to think, like, oh, I'm going to go on stage and tell jokes to people and make them laugh. If I think of it as an actual profession, it's like absurd and silly.
Yeah, but it's also hilarious.
Again. I've gotten to an age now where it's like I'm older and I can go, Okay, what I do for a living is is not that important?
That's true.
We need to laugh, of course, but you're gonna get it somewhere else if you don't get it from me. So it's like, you know, one less comedian is not gonna affect anything. I feel like you this sounds like a suicide note.
No, I feel like you're you would be like a really great spiritual guru.
That should be your next job.
I wouldn't want it to con people into hanging out with me.
How is that conning?
I don't know. Just because I assume you need followers, you already have followers. Yeah, I don't want them. I tell my fans all the time. I wish they would just leave. Why then I wouldn't have to go on stage. My night would have been better had they not own up.
Have you ever done a show where nobody showed up?
I mean recently?
No? No, No, like back in the day.
Yeah, of course, where there's like, oh, there's three people and yeah, but you're still itching to get up there. I'm gonna make.
These like tell me what that was like for you to get up there for three people and you just did your thing?
No I didn't confidence Yes, of course, I was like, this is dumb. I'd rather not do this then than try to, you know, pay my dues this way.
I think it's interesting.
I struggled. I struggled for like six weeks before things really started cooking. Six weeks. Oh my god, that was a joke. That was a joke, Like I'm leaving. What about where are you on therapy? You think we all should do therapy? Or no?
I think you should probably do therapy.
I can't tell me why because I'm because, uh, this is why I hate everybody that lives in my neighborhood. Okay, let's say that they're like people that were born and raised there out in Malibui. I'm like out in West Malibu, you know, farm bigger, you know people, we have chickens,
yeah whatever, bigger lots. Yes. So the people that were raised out there, it wasn't like high society back then, and so they're kind of this Malabamians and they feel entitled, and so I hate them because they're like, oh, these new people here like locals only. I hate anything anybody that ever says. My son had a shirt once ha said locals only, and I told him, I, God, don't wear that. He goes, mom picked out. I don't like it.
I go usually, I want you to wear a shirt that says non locals welcomed.
Yeah, that's nice.
Yeah, I'm gonna make that shirt. I'm gonna make that non locals welcome. I'd like to somebody brand that for me. Anyway. Then I hate everybody that is there now, like because it's expensive now. So they've moved there because they've succeeded financially in life. And when you succeed financially in life, you think every decision that you've made is the right one. You're constantly being told that you're oh, so you can't be told otherwise. So that's why I hate all of them.
I only bond with my gardener. It's like it's like the only people I can ever talk to you.
So you don't have any neighbors that you can get along with.
Yes, some, but they're just so many assholes.
Okay, No, what does this have to do with therapy?
So it's great. I'm glad you got me back to the point my thinking, and I'm sure it's wrong. I accept that. Is that the reason that I've gotten to where I am? This kid from a shitty town in Florida. So I came from that and now I've got all this, and I in my head think, well, all of those little demons is what allowed me to get here, so I better keep them.
Oh you think it's going to take your edge away?
It's kind of like when bands they get sober and then they lose their artistic.
Bands should never get sober.
Do you know what I'm saying.
I'm with you because I'm like, what happens you guys? The music has gone downward? But is that what you think?
I don't know if I think it, but it's like it served me well.
So is there a world where perhaps it will enhance, Yeah, but but.
Why risk it?
Like?
How much better do I want my life to be? My life's great? You know, I got a good family, Yeah, bills are paid, things are good. Let's not let's not rock the boat yet.
How does going to therapy damage that because I don't have I'm not saying that you need.
I'm not saying you have.
To go to You already told me any therapies don't.
Just saying like, I think everybody would benefit from time, you know, but you know what you're talking about things now, So I'd.
Rather I'd rather a therapist spend her time on a kid from East LA that didn't have so many things go right for them in their life, then waste their time listening to me fucking wine. It's probably where my head's.
That everybody's problems are important.
But this is the thing that's not true.
No, it is, it is everybody's.
You know, I think that this is so this is this is going back to what you said earlier about the all locals or all non local people welcome, right, So it's like, how do we then create this community or an environment where everybody's welcome? But then you're already taking yourself out of the communal aspect.
Yeah, no, I'm not speaking for myself, you're speaking for everybody else.
But you.
I have an app. I have a file on my U a tab on my phone always open. I can pull it right now. It's it's a retirement calculator, and you just put in how much money you have and it'll show you how much you can spend a month, and like if you live to be one hundred years old. Who So I'm always just staring at that.
It's not very healthy.
I don't want to be in jail and I don't want to be poor.
I think when when what you're saying your two biggest fears is like going to jail or being poor, like I would say that mine are probably similar to that.
It's not my biggest fear, you know. One of my biggest fear is when amoy ever says my biggest fear is and then they say something there's only one acceptable answer, monsters, Like if it's not monsters.
And I don't really care, but you don't believe in ghosts.
You believe I don't believe in monsters either, But that would be a real fear if all of a sudden, a monster came through this wall.
Oh my god, what about the UFOs that they've just confirmed.
Oh those aren't real, right, are they?
Or are they not?
They're not. Like by the time they figured this stuff out, we're gonna be gone.
I know That's how I feel. So I'm fine with it. I don't It doesn't affect my life. I'm just going to continue to water my plants.
Quit water in your plants. Okay, get succulents. They don't take all our water.
Dude, I kill succulents. Oh, I can't keep them alive on the plant killer.
You know, my wife had a succulent for six years that she watered and then found out that it was fake. That's who I married. She watered it for six years and then she found out that it was a fake plastic succulent. And I have to tell her that I love her, and I have to tell her that I trust her with my children. Oh boy, how long have you been in your current relationship?
Twenty years?
You've been dating this is a fella. Twenty years you've been dating them. You know what you guys should do when you're like eighty, ah, you should get married.
We actually were going to get married last year, but we ended up moving to the valley instead.
Coin flip huh yeah.
I was kind of bummed about that. But I'm like, h spend money on a wedding.
Or buy a house. I mean, you can get married without spending money.
I'm Mexican.
Oh yeah, my notes did not say that should I go? This is uncomfortable. I will not ask you this question. I've always wanted American Mexico to merge.
I mean this we are on Mexican land technically.
But I just want it all. And Canada, why not, We'll throw them in. Let's just all be one power country. I mean it'd be fun. I think it would be awesome for some reason. I I don't know. I just want to own it. That's the That might be my favorite thing I've said today. That's so stupid. All right, let me you were at Nike. I can't believe that. And you won't talk about Kevin Love. He's very sensitive, he has said, does he Yeah? I love him. I love him because he came to the Heat last year,
so he was great. I'm from Florida'm from Miami, so I well, I'm not from Miami, but I lived there for a week, so I say Spanish. Ah, No, I lived in Miami forever. All my friends are Cuban and Puerto Rican and you don't speak none, really none, Like all my closest friends are Latino, and I just refuse. I just tell him you're on my country. I scream, you're in my country. You learn my language.
Why does it turn the accent to now country hateful?
That's that's how it's supposed to sound.
Am I.
When are they are we told I can't do a redneck? A can't? Yeah?
Probably soon after this.
Good.
What's your feeling on cancelation.
I think it's great cancel people. I think people deserve it, and I, you know, obviously it's not a real thing where like, oh, your livelihood has gone yeah, but as someone who's done things and said horrible things constantly, I've had backlash and I deserve it. There has to be consequences. And I also don't think that there's a problem with evolving and like, oh I used to be able to say this and now I can't. Well, fine, good, that's I'm okay with that.
I like the opportunity for people to evolve into change. But it seems like people are more interested in the like lashing out and sort of ridiculing as opposed to giving people up ortunity to change in the tone, so to speak.
I mean, I don't know that I've ever changed because of anything. But I'm also just thankful that like, no, ex girlfriend wrote a big article and it got published about me, you know. No, you know what, I'm happy. That's great. That means I've had pretty good, solid relationship. That's also sad, though, because I think, like, oh, no girl ever thought.
To do that.
You feel a little left out kind of what is your sign your birthday?
Gemini?
Oh that explains everything I think.
Yeah, more more stupid stuff here we go. No, it's definitely you were born in May twenty ninth on the cancer side of Gemini.
That means, oh, you're a cancer side of Gemini. That is so. That explains so much. So you have that nurturing side about you.
Geminis are two faced, though, but the cancer cusp is good.
I'm a cancer and I'm a very loving and nurturing person.
Do you have any pets? Of course, what do you have?
I have three pipples, They're all.
I'm so great of you to do that, I know, you know what bothers me about pipples? What as someone who donates tons and tons of money to best friends, best friends, great organization. I don't know how many pipples I've saved. I get upset if I when I'm walking my dogs, if I just avoid, and then I get somebody going, oh, don't worry, my dog's super friendly. I go, yeah, until it's not. Yeah, you know how me? Deaths in this country have been caused by having ease? None ever, Yes,
it's never caused a death. Nobody's ever died because of a have an ease. So fucking leave me alone in my little dog. All right, So you got three dogs? That's good?
Yeah? No kids? How many kids you have?
You have? Two of sixteen?
You do not?
Well? I count the abort so two and then fourteen abortions?
Are you serious?
I was? I named them all.
All of your my abortion with the same person.
No, that would be insane. If a one woman had fortune abortions?
How did you?
How did you do that? So many abortions?
How do you have the conversation like with the girl or the I don't know if you were girlfriends or one night stands or whatever.
How did I have what conversation, like.
We're going to not have this child?
Well, you know see that it's heavy gas lighting. Uh, heavy gas lighting.
Do you maybe do you have kids outside that you don't know about.
Oh, there's a strong possibility, but it'd be crazy for that person not to have surfaced to get a paycheck by now, Like, what are they waiting on for me to hit like my second stride with this show? This show is going to be amazing, you know it's but we have to end this interview because they had to turn the air conditioner off for us to do the interview and then and now it's like it's gotten more. Yeah, so I'm going to have to.
Ask you to leave, to leave, Okay.
Thank you very much for being here. I will take almost everything you said into consideration, and I will try to maybe take a little more time out for my own mental wellbeing in the future. Sincerely, Okay, all right, Pasha, Well Carl, I'm fixed, Rosie did it? Thank you for being on the show. Rosie. That was eye opening. I hope I can evolve as a person. Look, God, that's
a tough pill to swallow. I'll be doing stand up in Reno and check out boyswearpink dot com if you have a toddler in your life before we get out of here. As you may know, I recorded my son for one year of his life when he was three years old. I recorded him telling me a bedtime story every night that he just made up. And then Eddie over there animated it. And now you're gonna watch it. See you next week. Tell me one one scary story. Okay, okay. One day, deep deep down, a bid who with a
bead Ryan and it would northern China. It was a bad Ryan.
The end.
Is not scary. This is a hole and there's a big lion in it. Goofball