How old are you getting thrown from a horse every day? Really? Yeah? How's your body handling that? Because no, you're not. How old are you now? Are you forty? Close to forty? Close to forty or you're not forty? Yeah? All right, you can't keep flying off horses.
No coshha Cosh Shows Show Show.
Good morning. I'm Daniel Tosh, the host of Tosh Show. Eddie. I hear you have got a video that you are dying to show me so excited about this one. All right, let's watch.
What did you do?
What happens? Oh? Now you just the fuck out of your trou Did you do well?
I know you felt Jack.
Even the dog can barely walk. Thank god that truck was there. Jeff would still be stumbling all the way to the ocean. The most interesting thing about this video is that they're probably thirty eight years old. Yeah. People always say, oh, you look so young. No, no, I don't. I don't look that young. I look forty nine. You look old as shit. Maybe eat better, sleep more, do some exercise. Gotta you gotta take care of yourself. Jeff
doesn't deserve to have that pickup truck. You know, you need to be a man drive a pickup truck like that. I don't pretend to be a man. That's the end of that statement. When I'm in southern California, I'm barely a man. When I head up north, when I get to the mountains, oh got my hatchet, my splitting mall. That's when I become a man. Although I've never had a chop wood yet. I you know, I had a cord. It's been like five years. I haven't gone gone through
it yet. It's like, how much how much wood are you supposed to burn? Me? And a man's tough. People depend on you when you're a man. That's why I always try to announce I'm barely a man. Let's get the expectations back. Don't ask me to do things. I'll call a man. I'll pay for a man to do
something me. No, I'm not the guy. You know. Sometimes when I'm up in the cabin, the power will go out and my generator won't turn on, and I go out there with my little portable jumper and I hook it up and I jump it and I get the generator going and there's power in the house. And I'm like, look at that. And then when the when the power comes back, the generator turns off. Everything gets tripped in the house. That's a pain. Then I gotta go to the garage and I gotta undo this panel, and I
gotta flip this big this big switch. And every time I flip it, it shocks this shit out of me. Oh, but things I can't do. I mean that that list is too long to go over. Protect my family, Nah, can't do that. I can outrun them, you know, so I can tell the story of what happened, Honor them with a story, a tale to tell you. I could learn a thing or two from today's guests. Enjoy. Pasha,
my guest today, has quite a life story. I'm going to attempt to relate while he talks about some real man shit like hunting for food and breaking wild horses. At least we both love animals.
Uh.
He's one of the best looking fells west of the Mississippi. Please welcome Chris, Thank you, thank you for having me touch Okay, this interviews can be all over the place. Your life story is a fascinating Let's start that you grew up on a reservation in Colorado.
Outside of Durrango, the Ute Reservation. Okay, my mom and my dad kind of had a lot of turmoil, and she went to the reservation and stayed there for help, and so I ended up being born there.
We ended up growing up there.
We stayed there for probably maybe six years, and then we moved to our own spot in Colorado off of like Ute Trail, So we're in the sticks aspen. Yeah, there's a lot of aspen trees there, but oh that this wasn't aspen. I got you.
No on veil. You grew up in vil.
Outside of there too, No, I got you. You grew up without electricity, No electricity?
How long?
No running water till we were about fourteen? We hunted for our food. We got our water off the side of a mountain, so it kind of to down into this drainage pipe and we would collect it at the pipe.
How did you take hot showers? No? Hot showers? You never had a hot shower. We had hot baths. How did you Okay, we.
Put the water over it like a fire and warmed it up and then put it in you know those.
They were cooking you. Yeah?
Do you know those kettles? It's like a almost like a stew kettle. You just basically boil some hot water in there and throw it in the tub. I mean we washed our clothes with a washboard. We had an outhouse, had a fruit cellar. Basically grew up off the land, like eating cactail, roots and dandelions and just weird stuff, you.
Know, everything that you can eat. When quite a bit.
My mom was really like savvy when it came to picking fruit and just different stuff like roots and berries.
It was pretty interesting. What about school?
Homeschooled all the way up until about sixth grade.
Legally homeschooled. My sister was the teacher. Okay, so not legally homeschooled. No, anybody pop in and he visits it from like.
No interestingly enough. I mean we were so far out. I don't even think they knew we were out there. So I don't even know he existed.
Yeah, they didn't even know. How many siblings? Did you have? Eight of us? Eighty seven? Yeah, five sisters and two brothers. It's a lot of people. I mean it's like a school it was. Did you guys get Comedy Central? No, it's a shame. Are are you part of Native American? Yeah?
So my mother, my mother is African American, Native American. Her mother's Cherokee and her father's African American. My father is German and Native American. So his father's German and his mother's Hopey. So maybe like fifty close to fifty percent.
Are Are you getting a government check or no? No? By choice?
I never applied, never got oney. It takes too much paperwork. I don't care that you're owed. Yeah, no, what's the amount that they do? You even know the amount that they give?
I have no idea. I'm gonna ask you to talk about your stepfather. Now. I'm gonna turn the microphone off and just listen to the next hour because I think it's fascinating. Yeah. What an interesting guy. Right.
Have you ever seen Davy Crockett, like the movie? I just know of Davy Crockett, like the movie, like the No. I never watched The King of the Final Frontier.
Uh huh.
Yeah. So Dave was like Davy Crockett. I mean he was super ingenuitive is the best word I could give it. He he never told us what he did, but where we lived, he had us like sifting for gold, you know how when you get into the river and you can kind of sift. We always found like these little tiny specks of gold, and we were kids, so we had no idea what fools gold was. But he'd like come up with these big fools gold nuggets and be like, yeah,
I'm going to town to turn in the gold. But he was actually a meth cooker, oh and.
So much different than a prospector.
So he would disappear for like weeks and then come back and bring groceries and we would get cool stuff from town because most of the time we were eating rabbit. Was he making the meth on your Honestly, I really don't know, but he didn't have I'm pretty sure he was because he didn't have any teeth. He always had ether and mercury, just weird stuff. I mean, we played with that kind of stuff as a kid. I remember the mercury thought was cool because you could like spread
it out and it would come together. And then Terminator came out and we saw that they were using mercury to make that terminator guy.
You know, as kids do when you're playing with mercury.
He had a lot of ether too. Our dogs would always get like into it with porcupines.
Huh.
He would just have a bodily ether on hand. Pour some in a washcloth and stick it over the dog's face and knock them out. And then take his little needle nosed pliers and just pull quills out.
And did he know the amount that you were supposed to?
He must have been like some kind of chemist. Did you lose any dogs?
Okay? I even saw this man pick up a horse one time. He like that seems like childish revisionist history.
Well, he put the horses like front of a body on his chevy, and then he went to the back and lifted up the back and threw his back out because he was hurt for a while, and then pushed the back end of the horse onto the because they had died. I'm thinking old age, but he like he picked the horse up and put I watched him do it. I was just like this guy is. I thought it was the coolest do it on the planet. I mean, Davy Crockett. He taught me how to fish, taught me
how to hunt, taught me how to track. He was very, uh outdoor savvy.
I'll say he knew how to get around.
Do you hunt for sport or no? I don't hunt for sport. We did do it for food, though, Do you eat a lot. Do you like food?
I do. I'll eat anything.
I think any food allergies As a kid that grew up eating ants, Is there anything you're like, Oh, I don't enjoy eating this. Grasshoppers, ants, crickets at no food allergies. Craw dads I used to think craw dads and grasshoppers were the best thing.
What's the fanciest food that you can't and that you can't get your head around? Why people eat it? S cargo? Yeah, me too. That doesn't seem like it serves a purpose.
I never ate snails when I was growing up. I just didn't see a purpose. We put salt on him and let him just kind of like shrivel up and die. I had a friend, this guy was he would pick birds up and like bite their heads off. You were friends with Ozzy Osbourne. I won't say his name, but yeah, he was strange. Sure, I mean we were eating crowdads and ants.
Right, but he wasn't. He wasn't biting heads off, bit that was off of them.
He wasn't even eating catching birds just out of curiosity, just climbing up the tree and grabbing a bird out of the nest.
Oh, it's a baby bird. No, this story just gets horrible.
I'll tell you a story about cigarette Remember back when they used to sell the cartons in the store.
Yeah, as kids, we were bad. We used to steal the whole cartons.
And one of my buddies got caught smoking by his mom and she was like, all right, you're gonna smoke this whole carton then, and they made us smoke the whole carton and I quit smoking cigarettes after that.
He still smokes to this day. But yeah, I had enough. They've they've I think I think they've proven that that's not the right way to parent. You know, he's got a great joke about that, as Norm MacDonald. Oh, he talked about getting caught and then his dad injected heroin into the eye of his cock, and so it's a good joke. He should look it up, all right. How that how that father in law story end? You know?
Actually he he got killed by bounty hunters.
Okay, it was.
Pretty it was pretty weird. Like that's about what I thought. Arkansas Dave, he was from Arkansas, you know, the bounty hunter that killed your stepdad. No, no, no, my stepdad's name was Dave.
Oh.
Sorry, and he was from Arkansas, so I wonder, like, was that Arkansas Dave they were talking? No, I don't know, though apparently he pulled a knife out at a gunfight and got shot.
Oh well, that's horrible. I mean, you're definitely the arguably the realist man I've ever had on the show. How long do you think you would survive if there was a zombie apocalypse? I think I could make it.
I mean as long as I was pretty far out and they weren't even interested in coming out there, kind of like protect the.
Services, all right, Now you are a cowboy, yeah, I would say, so. Now the term cowboy with with you know, indigenous people, Native American, those don't necessarily go hand in hand. You know.
That's the second time I've had that question. Okay, And when was the first time you kill that person?
No?
No, we were in Santa Fe. We were shooting this thing for Filson, and there was myself and a couple of the cowboys there and they were like, well, do natives call themselves cowboys? And I was like, you know, everybody that works horses or cattle calls himself a cowboy.
Okay.
I think that the word came from this is just what I've heard. So back in the day cowboys black and white. The white cowboys were called cow hands, the black cow hands were called cowboys, and the natives kind of just got thrown in there whatever, you know. So, if you were working on a ranch and you were working horses or cattle, you were.
Just a cowboy. How'd you get your land out in a Joshua tree?
I basically wrote the contract for a least to own for the first two years with the first ride of refusal. And I wrote that contract during the pandemic. I had pandemic prices.
Telling people exactly what you did. You were buying a large amount of acreage to open a horse sanctuary, yes, for wild horses, for mustangs.
I got the guy to sign the contract and then I ran with it. So I had the first ride of refusal after two years, and I was renting the land first for eight hundred dollars a month.
Uh huh, that's a good deal.
So during the pandemic, people were trying to get out of the city and they wanted to go and be outside. Right, And if you remember, we couldn't celebrate Christmas, we couldn't celebrate Thanksgiving.
I don't remember that people.
Couldn't celebrate their birthdays, so they were all coming to the ranch and renting campsites and celebrating there. So we had like thirty people every weekend. There were like a super spreader.
It was.
Maybe all right, but it was really nice. And so we first started renting the dirt and I was building fences. So then I built the fences, and then September of twenty one, I got my first two horses. You know, they say what you think about you attract, right, So I the first two horses I got were very special horses. They're called Nez Pierce, Blanket Applelousas. So I took these two reservation ponies, and the guy who sold me the reservation ponies gave me two horses. So September of twenty one,
I had four horses. And then my estranged uncle, I hadn't talked to him in forever, and he called me. He's in Palm Springs and he's like, hey, I heard you're out in Joshua Tree. Are you killing mustangs? And I was like, what, I'm saving mustangs. He was like, oh, okay, because I've heard a lot about mustangs and like people are shooting them, and I just wasn't sure what you were doing with them, and I was like, why don't
you come up and see what I'm doing? So he and his wife came up and they saw and they were like mind blown. I'll say this also a lot of people come and lose their shit, like they get there and they cry, or they just like go into this like meditative, like start having I don't know, downloads if you will, like just feeling like the the universe is talking to him. So I think that happened to my uncle. And he was like, how can I help? And I was like, well, why don't you save this
mustang from Colorado? And he was like okay, So he bought the Mustang out of the kill pen and shipped it to us. So I went from four horses to five horses. And then another lady called and was like, hey, I got a Mustang I can't train. Can I give it to you? And I was like sure, six mustangs? Then, now do you break that mustang? Yeah, we don't even call it breaking.
Okay, I didn't know that's the many word. I knew. We call it starting, uh huh.
So we start them, build a solid foundation and then let them go from there.
Well, why don't you just let them keep running wild? Or why do you have to.
So in America we have a high respect for horses unless you're at Santa Anita. Even there they really respect them and they love them. But it's just that the thoroughbred is so selectively bred and inbread that its hooves are really small and its bodies really big. So that big body on those really small hooves is hard on the legs and they break a lot of legs. And that Santa Anita track isn't really giving, so it hurts
those thoroughbreds. But on top of that, Thoroughbreds are raced at two years old, and they're racing career is over by five or six, and that's a long career. But a horse can live twenty five years past that. The life expectancy for a Thorowbread is actually nineteen, so they don't live much longer because they really run them hard and into the ground.
Right.
But while they're running at Santa Anita, they're very loved. Everybody takes care of them, they appreciate them, they baby them. But then when they're done running, they go to a thoroughbred farm where they're thrown out with thirty or forty other thoroughbreds that are retired, and they're fighting for their food and they just don't have such a great life anymore.
It's kind of like a supermodel who when she's sixteen to nineteen, everybody loves her right, and then when she's when she's twenty four.
You're just like, oh, oh, look this old hag. See if she can fight for some food. So you open this sanctuary and just right away started just rescuing horses or having people bring them to you or what was how was this working?
So I opened the sanctuary in October of twenty twenty. What's the name of it, Cascade Trails Mustang Sanctuary.
Do people ride your horses? Yes, all of them.
We have five that are not rideable right now because they're under the age of three.
I can ride it. I've ridden one horse a lot. Yes, my whole life. I love horses. I love all animals. I love horses, but I don't need to be on them, like to look at them.
There's an energy that exudes from horses that's so calming. Like I said, when people come there, they lose their shit and it's just I think it's just the energy that's there.
I've always wanted to adopt a couple Clydesdale's just to look at those things.
Those are called drafts, drafts. I want one of those drafts on your lot. I have two drafts.
You do. They're called I'm sorry, not pertrons. We have two Belgians. How many hands high? Is that good question? What do you know about hands? I don't know.
So hands are measured like this, Yeah, it's four inches and you go one the mits.
You gotta do three fingers with yours.
So we have two Belgians. One is nineteen hands and one is seventeen to one. The other the biggest horse that we had prior to that was the thoroughbred. She's sixteen hands. Okay, so yeah, two Belgian drafts. They look a lot like Clydesdale's.
I just like those commercials when the bud like or beer commercial. Yeah at Christmas time to make you cry. Yeah awesome, Oh they are awesome. How many sayings in the language that we have are horse related? Let's talk about that for a second. Okay, do you say champing at the bit or chomping at the bit? Chomping at the bit. It's champing. Wait really, yeah, the term is champing, but everyone says chomping at the bit. That's right, but the actual term is champion at the bit. That's interesting.
I mean, it kind of is, except for the people that fight me on it like it's zones because you think of just chomping at a bit. But it still comes from the same thing I believe, Well, I doesn't. Thoroughbreds kind of they do that champ at the bit. So thoroughbreds are trained to run into the bit. Most horses,
when you pull back, they think stop. But a thoroughbred, when you pull back, they run harder because the jockeys standing up on them and using the reins as leverage, and he's pulling and he wants the thoroughbred to run through that. What do you weigh about two forty?
Nah?
Do you a dream about being a jockey?
No?
Never, when I was a kid, but no, never. They're tiny, little fellows. They are little fellows. Holy cat, that's not normal. No, well, why don't they just wait and tell me why they don't just use girls. That's a good question.
I mean, nowadays with sports incorporating women into everything.
Seems like easy to get one hundred and five pound girl. That's a that's strong enough to do it. What's your love life like? Are you married? No, I'm not married. Have you ever been married? Yes? Yeah? How long it lasted? Two years? Two years? Divorce took longer? Uh huh it was Did she get half of a Mustang? No?
I didn't have anything at that point, so she was just happy to get rid of me. I think, huh, okay, kids, Yeah, we do. We have two kids. Are you done having children?
I don't know.
If I met the right woman and she was interested in that, then I would be open to it.
Are you in a relationship right now? I have a girlfriend? Is she the right person? We're working on things. I got the perfect person for you. She's just all she's into his horses, her Oh oh, she's been thirty seven and she wants to have kids though, that's about the age you have to have kids with her. You know you want? Do you want to hear a voice and when you call her see if she's interested. No, I think he might like her. Do you let me know.
We'll see. I'll check in on you a few months from now, and we'll see if you need to Uh another somebody to date that I got a perfect person. You call your motorcyclist steel horse. I do you ever dabbling pony play? I don't even know if you know a pony plays. That are the weird people on the internet that like pretend to be horses. No, so the ones that have the stick horse, yeah they do. Is that pony player? No pony player, They actually pony play
actually pretends to be a horse, right, hobby horsing. Hobby horsing is when you just run around on a stick and pretend jump and all that kind of weird. Yeah, that's pretty weird. It's also emotional, though. Yeah, sometimes you'll see them and just cry. Have you always been into horses?
Yeah?
I think so.
I mean I grew up watching he Man and his companion was battle Cat. I couldn't really ride that wasn't a horse a lion, So yeah, the horse was my battle cat.
I mean sure, if you had a large cat, that'd be awesome. I once worked add a sanctuary out in the desert out there with some guys that had illegally, you know, tooken a bunch of tiny tigers so people could take photos with them, and then they grew into monsters, and they're like, what are we going to do with them now? And so we had to, you know, send
them to different rescue places all over the country. So I'm out there working probably fifty to one hundred big cats and in cages that wouldn't hold a house cat in them. And I'm just out there volunteer and they're like just clean cleaning all the shit out of there. They're cannibalizing, eating each other, you know, because there's not enough food. They're the reward for working there was at the end of the day, you got to you got to hose them off, and they were just in heaven
to have water. And I'm just like right just standing next to a huge tiger with a hose and he's just eating the water like crazy.
I was like, ah, this is great. You remind me of I just dug this pond for him. So I have a pond in front of the water area, and it's like it almost looks like you're catching a glimpse of them feeling like, oh, this is this is what freedom was. We could have splash in the pond and it's.
Tough, yeah, but their space, they are still getting a bit of the good life. You get a little bit of both worlds too, some pampering that would have never been there. True, very true. What is average day for you? Like on your ranch?
It starts at five. I clean the pasture, I feed the horses, I fill up water, I give them the buckets. By the time i'm doing doing that, it's about eight thirty nine o'clock. Then I'll feed myself. I actually have a raven now, so I feed the raven. When I feed myself, I'll bring her and put her on the goat pen.
What does it cost to feed a horse every day? I broke it down.
I think the buckets end up being like three or four dollars a bucket, But hey fluctuates, so a bail of hay can be anywhere between twenty dollars and thirty dollars. And if you're smart, you'll cut the middleman out and you'll just go direct and buy by the ton. But you can get You can get one hundred and fifty bills a hay for about two grand, and you can get five hundred bills a hay for about four grand. So I usually try to get the five hundred bills, and that lasts me a lot longer horses.
Are they expensive to take care?
They are if you don't know what you're doing. Because somebody that doesn't know how to make the feed themselves, they're gonna buy all that different feed and they're gonna scoop it out individually and end up spending five hundred dollars every two weeks just for feed, whereas I can spend five hundred dollars in two weeks and make that last four weeks. So I'm cutting my costs in half.
I mean, it's just a full day. This is just breakfast time. Where's that nine? Yeah? What time do you go to bed? I'm usually done right around like nine nine o'clock. Jeez, so much work? How often are you getting thrown from a horse every day? Really? Yeah? How's your body handling that? Because no, you're not How old are you now? Are you forty? Close to forty? Close to forty or you're not forty? Yeah? All right. You can't keep flying off horses.
No, but people that train horses they learn how to not fly off.
Right.
You can control a jump better than you can control a fall. Okay, so I'm jumping if I think it's getting bad, I'm jumping you.
Ever see that mister Hans video. No, this guy guy was killed having sex with a horse. Wow, it was disturbing. That sounds disturbing. Apparently it was legal, though in the state of Washington there was some like beastiality loophole. That doesn't matter. How many times did day do you say yeehaw? Hardly have never? Okay? Can you play a harmonica? I can? Do you play poker? Yep? How many times have you seen tumbleweed just rolled by you a lot in the desert?
How hot is it? It gets triple digits? So your horses don't have a problem with that.
It's pretty awesome. They don't.
I mean, and I only know because sometimes I don't wear my shoes. I'll run around. We call it grounding. What what's called grounding? So you barefoot? You just let your feet touch the earth.
We just call it bare feet. Yeah, there's a technical term.
Now okay, but one day I was out there and it was I we could probably leave this out too. So I have a campground as well, and we get a lot of campers that come and they like they don't use all their party favors, right, And people in the desert like to participate in the dark arts. Sure, So they come out there with like bags of mushrooms.
I'm gonna leave this in just so you know. So he comes, he's leaving, and he gives me like this ziplock bag of mushrooms. I love them.
So the guy gave you these mushrooms and he was like, hey, we couldn't finish these.
You want them? And I was like sure.
I'm sitting there, it's probably maybe two or three in the afternoon. I just start eating the mushrooms, just eating them.
You thought it was a snack, for real.
I just thought it was food. I thought it was mushrooms. That's what he thought he gave you. So I eat these mushrooms and six years later, the obviously the effects of it took. It took a little bit, but it started. I noticed after that the ant pile was like pulsating, and I felt like the antswer like marching one by one, and I could see him like dancing to the rhythm.
They knew you were about to eat. That is that the last time you've done mushrooms? No, I prefer the tea now. Actually, okay, well that's fine. Somehow in between growing up on a reservation in Colorado and being a cowboy in the desert. You lived in La. Yeah, of all places, did you hate it here? You know?
LA's a lot like the desert, beautiful but brutal. A lot of people come to LA with high hopes and asper and LA just beats them down. But I really just came to work. My brother had gotten to a motorcycle accident, so I left Colorado to come here and kind of help him recover. No spinal neck or back injuries, but he was bedridden for like four months. Huh, and I basically had to be like his housemaid. Did you have to wipe him everything? It was crazy. My brother
had to wipe me once. When I was in college. I had broken both arms. I couldn't get behind. Wow, Well, what a good brother. But then you moved to La. So did you have culture shock When you first got here? They shaved me. They cut my hair off. It was like I looked like a really like a caveman.
Right.
I'd been riding horses and training horses the whole time I was in Colorado, and so when I got to La, they were like, you can't. You're not gonna be able to get a job looking like that. You got to shave and trimming hair or something. So I ended up getting a job doing security at the Roosevelt Hotel, and I was working security at the West Hollywood addition. So my LA experience was different from most people's LA. I just went to work and kind of take care of
my brother. So opportunities just open. And while I was taking care of my brother, I couldn't do anything else. I couldn't really have a job or he required twenty four to seven care. So finally when he got back on his feet, he was like, I'm leaving Hollywood.
There's no structure. I don't like it.
I'm moving to Australia. And he said I could have his apartment for a month and then the lease was up. So I'm in Beverly Hills and the lease is ending.
That's where he has. Apartments in Beverly Hills. Apartments in Beverly Hills.
Your brother was doing great, he was doing really well. He's still doing well. Boy, he's in Australia. Well, he's back in LA now Okay.
In Beverly Hills. From eating ants to living in Beverly, you guys are the real Beverly Hillbillies. You know.
I just kind of was like, this is you know, this is a culture shock for me because people there were like even some of the girls I talked to, they were like, I would be like, you want to have lunch and they'd be like sure, and I'd be like, let's meet at subway and They're like, eh, yeah, I don't need subway And I'm like, what, well, it's disgusting, all right, and you know that now, right?
Do you know it? Now they make I don't know, no, I don't know what they use. But so they sponsor a great sandwich. It was pretty interesting, right, So you didn't do well. You didn't do well dating here, not at all.
It was just kind of tough because, like I said, some of the girls they even down to like where I grocery shopped. I would go I would be like, let's let's go get something to eat, Let's pick up some groceries at Ralph's.
Ralph's, that's not good enough. We're going to Bristol Farms. Okay, That's what I'm talking about. That's why you can't have an apartment Beverly Hills and go to next year to tell me that you went to John's. You know, Vaughn's is garbage. Then John's is below Vaughn. I've never been to there's a John's. Yeah, it's not good. I used to take a girl every now and on a date. We'd go to just the food court thing in Whole Foods where you just take a box and you fill
it with whatever you wanted. I thought it was fancy enough, but that wasn't good enough. They didn't like that as a date. Anyway, you work security at the Roosevelt Hotel and you believe you saw the ghost of Marilyn Monroe. So first, my ninth question that I ask you every guest, do you believe in ghosts? Absolutely, absolutely believe in ghosts? And while working at the Roosevelt Hotel, you believe you saw the ghost of Marilyn Monroe?
True or false? True, and you tried to hit on her. Gosh, that's true. So I'm working at the Roosevelt. My shift is two to eleven. I've been there for probably maybe three months now. And there's like you do what's called a perimeter patrol. As I'm doing the perimeter patrol, you go out and around the entire hotel and you come back through the back and you go in through the back gate and it brings you into what's called the beer Garden. And the beer garden is underneath the bridge
that overlooks Tropicana. So Tropicana is the pool area, and there's the Marylyn Monroe Suite, which is where she lived quite some time, right there on the edge of the Tropicana Pool area. So one night, I'm walking through the beer Garden and out of the corner of my eye, up on the bridge, I see this woman wearing like an old white gas and it just looks totally out of place for twenty eighteen. And she has a really
nice figure with no like just doesn't look like she fits. Okay, So I walk around, I go up the stairs and I get up to the top and no one's there, and I'm looking around, like where did this lady go? But the Roosevelt's known for being haunted, so there's like there's a few different places where people see apparitions. When you said do I believe in ghosts, I think ghosts are I know this is going to sound desert woo woo, but I think it's energy.
Right.
So, because Marilyn was there so much and so many people knew she was there and loved her being there. There's like this collective energy that she's able to manifest there, and so that's the best way I can explain her being there. But that wasn't the only ghost situation there. So at the Roosevelt there's this room called the Spare Room. It's like a bowling alley slash bar. We had a
security officer at the spare Room get possessed. Basically, he I don't know if he was on drugs or what, but he like started foaming at the mouth, talking this weird I guess you would call it tongues, just being extremely weird. We had to remove him from the spare room and then send him home because he was really.
Because he was having a stroke and you didn't want to call the hospital. No, he was having some type of episode. I hope it was a stroke. Yeah, some of them. Maybe they should have called nine to one more.
But there was a lot of weird stuff that happened to the Rose Horse. I mean, oh gosh, I can tell you stories about the Roosevelt all day. So one time John legends there they're having a party on the rooftop.
One of the guys who's there. I hate that I have to say this, but he.
Was like like his head was on his shoulder, so his whole, his whole, Both of his shoulders seemed like they were shifted this way, and his head was like over here. And people were saying he was a god from some outer space star series, some crazy stuff.
Right. You ever see those conjoined twins, that one of them was a cowboy singer, a country singer. It's like a little one attached to the head, and she was a country singer. She was like small, and then there was like a big person that wasn't into country music.
You never saw them all right, Well he looked that up sometimes a straight guy in that world. And there were people who were backing his story. Okay, well they're all idiots. I always give guests things that are on my show.
You ever use a lip bomb, but in the desert, it's hot, so you need this little lip bomb cooler? Okay, that way with me. Yeah, you're gonna put that in here. Let me see that mightsticks might be too big. We'll see.
That almost looks like yer a toy. No, my friend, No, it's not a sex toy. My family, my cousin's. I don't know a cousin's cousin. He invented this. It's got my initials on it. I'm giving it to you, lovely, it says chappy. I don't, but so your lip bomb doesn't melt out there in the desert. Also, you need a lint roller. My wife buys this stuff in bulk and I don't like it.
I don't know if it's gonna fish it out. But I had this.
One West this this you know, it's kind of like a good looking deum.
Well right, I was like, I haven't even worn it, and I go, I'm not gonna wear this shirt. I go, I gotta get I gotta pass it on. So let's me. But I don't know if it'll fit you because you're way broader than I am. That's a you don't want to wear that. Come out to the red No, no, no, I give you. I give you this shirt. This is amazing. Yeah, thank you. You're welcome. Dude. You can just set that all on the ground there. That doesn't matter.
This is actually pretty cool because chapstick does melt out there.
Well, of course it does not anymore. Now you got yourself cool little somebody's gonna think this is It doesn't matter what they think. Okay, you're a man. You can handle having a little pink dildo in your pocket. What do people need to do to help your horse sanctuary?
Come and visit, interact with the horses, see that there's a benefit. Like you said, you don't have to ride them to get the benefits.
You currently have twenty five horses. Fun, how many could you actually? What was? It's a maximmer. You could probably hold there.
When I reverse whiteboarded this, I did it from ninety Uh huh, I could easily hold ninety.
But there's there's myself. I mean employees. You got over there.
I have a handful of volunteers and two employees, a young lady that runs the back office and a young lady that manages the campground.
I heard you had a high desert danny out to your ranch. Yeah, that's our snake lady friend. She calls herself the rattlesnake wrangler. Huh.
And a wrangler works horses. Okay, So I was like, hey, if you're a wrangler, come ride horses with me. And she was like, I've never been on a horse. I'm scared of horses. I was like this, okay, you can come out here. I'll help you out. So she came out and put her on her trail ride and she did great. Then she came back. She brought a lot of weed, uh huh and snakes and it was fun.
Are all these stories true? Are you is a brilliantly trained character actor. No, they're true. Yeah, you've lived quite a rich life, that is. It is impressive. You sure you don't want to take a run at my wife's cousin. No, I'm telling you, man, I think you're gonna like her. I'm gonna send her out there. She's all she's just a horse. I mean, she's in a relationship too. But well it doesn't man, it's I listen, she wants kids and she loves horses. You guys, just you're two peas
in a pod. That's all I'm saying. Oh you're gonna love her, you guys, then we're gonna be family. It's gonna be weird. I listen. We appreciate everything you do all the best, Daniel, Thank you so much for having them. All right, man, I'll see you at the UH at the next family reunion. Pasha, I want to thank Chris for being on the show. I can't wait to get out there and ride that horse. I don't think i'll do it. I'll be honest with you, I'm not I
don't want to be on top of a horse. I'll stop by, I'll say hi, but no, no, I'm not gonna get on a horse. How about you? Have you ridden a horse?
Carl?
Can a dog ride a horse? That's a great question. What's going on? What have you been up to? You watching Wimbledon? Huh, I'm watching Wimbledon. Sinner? You know the new current world number one, Alcarez, Love them love Alcarez. Now you know his haircut's getting a little better. It started out very poor, now it's getting better. Cinner. The problem I have with Sinner I've seen him play several times. I can't wrap my head around a redheaded Italian. It's
just weird. And then when he talks, I'm like, oh, I keep forgetting you're Italian because he's got red hair, and I just don't think of Italians as gingers. But sure enough, they've got gingers over there in Italy. Speaking of tennis, I watched that movie the other day. What's it called The One with Zendaya. Oh yeah, challengers. Challengers didn't know I was embarking on a little soft core porn, just just all kinds of sex in that. I thought
Zindaia was great. There's no chance that you know, she should get an award for that. But the story was silly and ridiculous. My problem with it was I couldn't believe the time spanned that she was, you know, sixteen seventeen in the beginning, and then she's thirty something in the end. It's like, well, you look the exact same. It's like, oh, oh your haircut, you gave yourself a bad bob, and now I'm supposed to believe you're older. That ass ain't thirty mm hmm. Showing her sweet cheeks
in that movie, you believe that? That was uncomfortable. I was just sitting next to my wife the whole time watching this movie. Oh, isn't necessary. I don't find that attractive whatsoever. You know, Yeah, tennis very sexual game. Apparently that's why I like pick a ball. You know, it's it's it's less less about the sex and more about just hitting a ball back and forth over a net. All right, what's going on boyswearpink dot com. Check out
our clothing line for toddlers. The Goat. All episodes available now on Prime. We're going on tour. We're doing shows different places, New Orleans, shows in Hawaii. I think we're gonna add something in December. We got to find a place to go in December. Another one of my son's bedtime stories. See you guys next week. A little story tonight because I'm really sleepy.
Love it.
Yeah that's too short. Give me a nice story about maybe you won't really like it. Well, I'll be the judge.
Okay, Once upon a time they were desulted in the water. They were listen and told it. But any time they trast away, how theyd ate them dying time eating either when they at night time, they do a time out, and then they then get a sissy. Then and then the show about a ship signing Nemo, and then I
Don't swer that that was awful