Thriving can seem impossible given our trauma. So how DO we thrive? Maline and I dive into freeing ourselves up, re-configuring our brains and letting new ideas in. We talk about lightening up on ourselves to progress along the healing curve. Here's a bit about Maline from her website: "I am an adoptee who through lived experience has been able to better understand the thoughts of adoptees young and old. As an adoptee I am able to connect with those living the life I once lived. With a degree in...
Mar 03, 2023•55 min•Ep. 265
Considering searching? Scared of rejection? Confused about the next step? Adoptee and Genetic Genealogist Gerri shares what she's learned riding her own emotional rollercoaster and helping 300 other adoptees do the same. It's insightful, powerful and empowering. Geraldine Berger, known as " The Genetic Genealogy Coach ," is a professional genetic genealogist and author, specializing in helping adult adoptees and others with unknown parentage to identify and locate their birth parents, and other ...
Mar 02, 2023•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 264
Empathy helps us understand the important others in our lives - like our adoptive parents as well as people who may not be in our lives such as our birth mothers. Understanding them brings more peace for us as well as oiling our relationships. Listen in as we dive deep on how we can up our empathy game. Here's a bit about Danielle from her website: My name is Danielle and I am an Earth Citizen 🙂 . What I mean when I say that, is I have a sincere desire to see a healthier, happier and more peace...
Mar 01, 2023•52 min•Ep. 263
Many adoptees - myself included - delay the search for our birth mothers for fear of rejection. We don't believe we could handle it. We are still feeling the aftershocks of the initial rejection. Lori shares what she's learned about surviving rejection, underestimating our emotional resilience and ability to bounce back. We both loved this deep and profound conversation and hope you do too. Here's a bit about Lori and her book: Jakiela is a Professor of English/Creative Writing at The University...
Feb 28, 2023•57 min•Ep. 262
Oleg became an orphan at 9. But he's NOT a prisoner of the past. How has re-written his story to serve him? What has he learned that helps him thrive. Empowering and inspirational. Listen in with BIG ears. Here's Oleg's story from his website: I was nine years old when I became an orphan, but before I was an orphan, I grew up in a small, cold, and empty apartment in Russia with my older Sister, and an alcoholic Mother. We were born into poverty. Living without a Father and with an alcoholic Moth...
Feb 27, 2023•1 hr 19 min•Ep. 261
Transracial adoptee Matthew shares how he's found clarity and resolved confusion about who he is to find peace. There are insights aplenty on shame, feeling different and a host of other issues that can plague transracial adoptees. Here's the book I mention https://www.amazon.com/Power-vs-Force-Dr-David-R-Hawkins-audiobook/dp/B000KZRMCO MATTHEW SALESSES is the author of eight books, including The Sense of Wonder , which comes out in January 2023 from Little, Brown. Most recent are the national b...
Feb 10, 2023•55 min•Ep. 260
Nicole pledged to herself that she'd search for her birth mother at the tender age of 4. Now in 60's she has been in reunion for over half her life. Like many of us she felt torn - lost in 'the space between'. She shares how she's found herself to feel comfortable in her own skin. Listen up for your own insights on navigating reunion and feeling comfortable in your own skin. Here's a bit about Nicole from her website An adult adoptee, I'm the author of a reunion memoir, Swimming Up the Sun , whi...
Feb 09, 2023•58 min•Ep. 259
Listen in as Melissa shares what she's learned after coming out of the fog and finding her true, authentic self. We go deep on higher self-esteem, spotting gaslighting and more. Profound and surprising. There's more to fog than adoption.... Melissa is an adoptee and the host of Mind Your Own Karma-The Adoption Chronicles Podcast. She is passionate about educating the world about adoption after discovering so many adoptees hurting deeply by their relinquishment experiences. By inviting anyone in ...
Feb 08, 2023•49 min•Ep. 258
This episode is all about one of the most dramatic turnarounds we've ever heard on the podcast. Lorah used to think that God hated her. That she was a demon. That her soul was shattered. Reunion shook her to the core. So what changed? Listen into her profound shifts. Let them catalyse shifts in you. Here's a link to the Rupert Spira video on trauma I mentioned https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7xz2GB89Oc Here's more about Lorah from her website: Welcome! Here’s a little bit about me. I am The Ado...
Feb 07, 2023•51 min•Ep. 257
Kirsten never wanted to be stuck. So how did she become unstuck from her trauma? So she could heal, grow and move forward. How did she keep going when it got really scary and would have been easier to turn back. Listen in to a very powerful and empowering episode. Here's a bit about Kirsten and her book from her website: I was born and immediately relinquished for adoption in Pennsylvania in 1971. I have spent the last ten years unraveling what that means for me. It is a never-ending journey wit...
Feb 06, 2023•54 min•Ep. 256
Feeling like an outsider. So many of us felt like that growing up. And that feeling has stayed with us into adulthood. Listen in as Leah shares her journey to feeling at home. Fitting in. Comfortable in her own skin. It's NOT a straight or straightforward. But there's insights aplenty. Listen in for your own. This episode is a real catalyst. Here's a link to Leah's interview with Haley https://www.adopteeson.com/listen/202 Here's more about Leah's project for adoptees: BACKGROUND: In My Heart: T...
Feb 05, 2023•44 min•Ep. 255
Shame is incredibly toxic. Birth mothers suffer, adoptees suffer. Listen in as we go deep into shame from birth mother Patricia's perspective. Some things lead us to change our mind, others lead to a change of heart. Others - like moving beyond shame -change our world. Listen in to one of our most profound episodes yet. Here's a link to the Primal Wound video I talk about https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bnz7I7V_IOQ& Here's a link to the podcast episode with the audio version of that https://...
Feb 04, 2023•52 min•Ep. 254
Listen on as Alice shares how she found the patience and persistence on her quest to find and meet her birth mother. There are bags of insights, realisations, twists and turns. Buckle up for a rollercoaster of a ride. Here is a link to the publication Alice mentions https://drive.google.com/file/d/1b2nqk1B6XrYH1qRez_tryDW34Yv0qSmd/view?usp=sharing Here is a link to her profile and research https://pure.qub.ac.uk/en/persons/alice-diver/publications/ Here's a link to the webinar video I mention ht...
Feb 03, 2023•47 min•Ep. 253
Wisdom is a lot quieter than the negative voice in our heads. Listen in as Terrie and I explore finding truth and peace in that quieter place. From there's no need to try to numb or dismiss our painful feelings of loss, grief, shame and insecurity. There's no need to protect ourselves any more. A truly beautiful and healing conversation. Terrie Novak is an adoptee and privileged to a rare abundance of love shared with her bio kids, adoptive parents, first mother, and biological siblings. Terrie ...
Feb 02, 2023•52 min•Ep. 252
How can the anguish of losing our birth mothers become the belief that we are not good enough? Join Vin and me as we explore the origins and growth of adoptees' shame. The better we understand this, more time we spend exploring it, the more likely to see through it to a more positive view of ourselves. This is a fundamental shift in our perspective. Such shifts change lives. Listen in for your own shifts. Born in India, adopted at 10 months, raised in Australia, Vin is a true one off. Vin runs a...
Feb 01, 2023•56 min•Ep. 251
Julia Brewer Daily is a Texan with a southern accent. She has a B.S. in English and a M.S. degree in Education from the University of Southern Mississippi. She has been an educator, Communications Adjunct Professor at Belhaven College, administrator, and Public Relations Director of the Mississippi Department of Education and Millsaps College, a liberal arts college in Jackson, MS. She was the founding director of the Greater Belhaven Market, a producers’ only market in a historic neighborhood i...
Jan 31, 2023•50 min•Ep. 250
This episode is a break from the norm as we go into what Karen has learned hosting adoptive parents in Ukraine and interviewing 63 adoptive families back home in the USA. We go deep on integrating biological and adoptive families from overseas and revealing the treasure in what Karen calls "the brokenness and beauty of adoption". A Pacific Northwest native, Karen Springs lived in Kyiv, Ukraine for over fourteen years advocating for orphaned and at-risk children and working with hundreds of adopt...
Jan 30, 2023•1 hr•Ep. 249
There's n othing more upsetting than seeing your child upset. Adopted kids can be more sensitive and easily upset. I'm adopted and bullies often made my young life a misery back in the 70's. Listen in as adoptee, birth mom and teacher Amanda and I explore how we can stop bullies upsetting your kids. Check out the book Amanda wrote with her mother at: https://www.amazon.com/-/es/Ann-Angel/dp/0980208165 Replay of How To Prevent Bullies Upsetting Your Adopted Child webinar https://www.youtube.com/w...
Jan 27, 2023•49 min•Ep. 248
Join us as we explore what adoptive mom Beth learned - and continues to learn - as her son struggles with addiction. It's raw, deep and profound. Here's a link to the book I refer to in the podcast https://www.amazon.com/Dying-Be-Me-Journey-Healing/dp/B09RY5S44R Beth Syverson is a mom, wife, musician, and as of 2021 a podcaster, activist, and public speaker. Since 2019, her son Joey has struggled with addiction to substances plus serious mental health issues. For the first year of that roller co...
Jan 26, 2023•51 min•Ep. 247
Insights, epiphanies and aha moments. Our eyes open to reveal something different. We see the world differently, more clearly, better. And when we see better, we do better. Sometimes they save our lives. This episode is all about Lori's lifesaving insights. She delves deep into the tough stuff - grief, mental health and painful emotional wounds. We would both love you to listen to it and have your own insights. As a wife, adoptive, biological, and special needs mom, teacher, writer, and speaker,...
Jan 25, 2023•41 min•Ep. 246
Amanda felt alone and angry. But she refused to stay that way and went on a deep journey within. Listen in as she shares her biggest learnings on that journey - emotional safety, loving ourselves and much more. I hope you love listening to this as much as we loved our conversation. Deep and profound. Just the way you like your podcasts. Here's a bit about Amanda from her website: Coming out of the fog (unpacking my own adoption) was by far the hardest thing I have ever done. It broke me to the c...
Jan 24, 2023•1 hr 17 min•Ep. 245
As adoptees our most overwhelming fear is that of another rejection. Ann and I explore the insights have helped her overcome this and other fears in life-changing moments. Join us as we dive deep into her biggest aha moments and listen in for your own epiphanies. Ann Kief and her husband live in the Florida panhandle. Her professional life was mainly focused on education, leadership and college administration. She taught at the university, college and grade school levels as well as in numerous p...
Jan 23, 2023•56 min•Ep. 244
Understanding WHY we do the things we don't want to do often initiates stopping doing them. So please stick with my lengthy set up this episode - it's well worth it. Lynn and I explore adoptees' concern for other people's thoughts about us including why it triggers are own insecurities. What's wrong with me is perhaps the most common questions we ask ourselves. Listen in for some more empowering questions in this profound episode. Here's the link to the book I mention in the podcast https://www....
Jan 20, 2023•1 hr•Ep. 243
Trauma experts talk about neuroplasticity as our brain's ability to change but they don't explain how to harness it. It's a lot simpler than it seems. Lightbulb moments start change. So how do have more lightbulb moments? By listening to other people's lightbulb moments. By remaining open as we listen. Being aware of when our old beliefs are blocking new ideas like bouncers block new people coming into a nightclub. Suni shares some of her lightbulb moments about her birth mother, forgiveness and...
Jan 19, 2023•54 min•Ep. 242
The adoption world is trauma obsessed. I believe we should be trauma informed and healing obsessed. Michelle does too. We go deep on holding the energy to heal, allowing and expressing our emotions. There's a place underneath those emotions that's already and always whole, untouched by the trauma let's go there. And unveil who we truly are. Adoption is a spiritual journey. But not in a woo woo way, just a path that reveals who we are when we see that. Here's a bit about Michelle : This is my Fos...
Jan 18, 2023•55 min•Ep. 241
In a first for the podcast this lovely couple provide an incredible insight into what goes on for birth parents, how they kept going (and together) despite being riddled with emotion and how our suffering connects us. We explore the deep insights they had along the way that have shifted their focus on to Michael. Because relationships start with us. How we are. Doing our own work makes us better. Find out more about their book and download it free: https://bertauski.com/expectations/ https://www...
Jan 17, 2023•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 240
How do we get through the toughest stuff? When a life-threatening medical condition, an alcoholic husband, and a traumatic special needs adoption shatter that dream, there are only two choices—crumble or change the narrative. We go deep on how we do that covering topics such as resilience, epiphanies and eye opening insights. Inspirational. A young girl dreams of the perfect life—marriage, children, and a career—her happily ever after. Valerie learned to embrace the unimaginable to create an ext...
Jan 16, 2023•55 min•Ep. 239
Conversations oil our understanding of other people's perspectives and our relationships with them. They also give us a comparison to our own perspective if we are brave enough to go there. Why does that matter? Because shifts in our perspective power the insights to help us to better lives with less anger and resentment. Listen in as we go deep on conversation, communication and much more. Julie Ryan McGue is an author, a domestic adoptee, and an identical twin. She writes extensively about fin...
Jan 13, 2023•51 min•Ep. 238
What comes after the fog? What helps us navigate that? What do we do to feel good? Adoptee Paul and I go deep for answers, because that's where the priceless gems are hidden. Those priceless gems are insights that move us to a better, happier place. We both loved this conversation and hope you love it too. If you don't we will give you your money back. Hold on a minute - we're giving you these priceless gems free! Enjoy.... Here's a bit about Paul: Paul Kimball, a biracial adoptee, explores his ...
Jan 12, 2023•55 min•Ep. 237
Most of us adoptees tell ourselves a tough story about ourselves. A story that we are not good enough. Adoptee Lisa has taken what she's learned - and continues to learn - into helping fellow adoptees as a therapist. Listen in as she shares her learnings with great clarity and hope. Let Lisa guide you to the light at the end of the tunnel - being the hero in your own story. Here's a bit about Lisa from her website: Lisa Floyd, NCC, LMHC-A Adult Parent-Child Relationships Adoption Therapy Special...
Jan 11, 2023•58 min•Ep. 236
