#2128 Late Starter - Mick Hall

the system. And I think if the doctor's running late, it might ironically be an indication that they care, because you know what I'm saying. But although I did do a phone consult the other day because I just needed some blood pressure medication that I take. No everyone on it's not because I'm out of shape, It's because mum and dad's genetics. But start to finish. The whole consult on the phone was three hundred three three and a half minutes. So what is that one hundred and eighty

three and ten seconds. I remember getting off going, fuck, that's good money for them. But I think it's like seventy bucks. I'm like they had a win. Yeah that's twenty dollars a minute. That's a good alley rate. But anyway, I got my drugs. You know, a BP's back down, you know, not clutching my chest anymore, didn't have to drive anywhere. But Tiff, how are you?

He's like a fucking four year old in a lolly shop. He's got the attention span of a fucking ferret.

how good does that sound? And I don't normally eat lunch, but I'm like, well, it's just protein and a bit of at, and so I ate the scrambled eggs and the chicken, which was backstroking in about a gallon of butter. Couldn't have been any yummier butter, eggs, chicken, salt, pepper. I inhaled that like the fat kid that I was at a birthday party and and it was so How good was it? Mick?

I eat passed it virtually every night, and I've got very very very low body fat and I've got good muscle density, and it's just amazing what your body can do and how much it's sort of you know, it can it can thrive on certain foods, and having all that protein was just beautiful, you know, like it just keeps me, keeps me full all day. Yeah, I'm I'm not hanging for something with wishing that it was a

bigger meal or anything like that. It just just holds me and I can still train at a pretty high level and you know, expend all my energy and it just gives me everything I need.

three hours later. Yeah for sure. But I literally and when I did eight dinner finally it was half my dinner because I'm like that that shit just just it didn't destroy me because I felt good. But I'm like, oh I could I reckon, I could almost eat one of them a day and I'd be done. Yeah, probably not more, but you know maybe, but yeah, anyway, enough

about our lunches. So one of the things I talk about a lot, which everyone not everyone, but I guess a lot of my listeners know, is I'm fascinated with human potential. I'm fascinated with you know, how much of our potential we can tap into, which I did an episode very recently. You know. So there's a thing called the potential capacity gap, and the potential capacity gap is sorry, performance capacity, Sorry everyone, performance capacity. There's a lot of

shit in my head anyway. The performance capacity gap is your current level of performance and capacity, I said to you yesterday, Mick, is what you're actually capable of, Like, what is your actual ten out of ten limit potential? Like foot to the floor redlining ten thousand revs? What could you do if you had to do it now? Obviously we can't redline consistently, but we tell ourselves a story. And this is an analogous to all the same as the rate of perceived exertion. We've spoken about a few

times in exercise. But I was listening to you yesterday and I was just thinking, it's so fucking amazing knowing your background, which was to say less than ideal is the understatement of the millennium, like you had to Like, if I was trying to turn someone into an athlete and there was a thousand people I had in a queue, I would pick you one thousand, not because of you, not because of your genetics, but because of how fucking abused your body had been and just you know everything,

are you know the mentality No, not really, I think the mentality is good, but the ship that you've done to your body and the trauma that it had been through for not a week, but for probably a decade or two, you know, And then thinking about and I want to share this because one it's just an interesting story, and two I like people to go, oh, well, if Mick can do that, or Tiff can do that, or even Harps can do that, who doesn't have great genetics?

Then what could I do? Because that's the real question is not what do I think I can do? Because that's really your story about your ability versus what is actually possible for me? If I did everything I can do, really, no bullshit, no excuses, no talking myself down, no limiting, no putting on the emotional and psychological handbrake, no self sabotage. Just if I fucking was fearless and not lazy and proactive,

what could I do? And I think that you know, this whole show is about potential and possibilities and performance and so it's a beautiful fit. So that we'll start from that, we'll work back from the end. So for those who don't know you at the minute, this phase of your life. Among other things, you're a boxer. How old are you now?

a forty nine year old man. I was out in the back of the change rooms and I was crying because it meant so much to me.

going to keep doing it. And I had this just this in and knowing that I had to move past something within myself. I didn't know what exactly what that was, but I just knew that I needed to keep going and I had to move past something. I had to settle something within me, in my in my soul, in

my psyche. And and like you said, like we let into you know, like there was a lot of trauma and a lot of stuff for my past and a lot of you know, a way of my life where you know, I spent you know, as we know, numerous times in prison, I was around an element where there was a lot of violence and a lot of fear and a lot of control. And you know, and I did a lot of things in my life that I

was very shameful of. And you know, one of them, one of them that that sort of I haven't talked about a lot, but sort of sits in there is is that you know, I've got a young daughter that was born when I was seventeen, and you know, I was sort of out of her life at eighteen and she was one, and we didn't really reconnect again until she was twelve, and she's thirty seven now. But for a lot of her life, I mean I basically, through my addiction, I let her go and I didn't chase.

I was a child myself, but I just didn't follow up and I just didn't. I let it go, you know. And I've hated myself for that all my life. And then and of course then that got me asking questions within myself at different times, like am I a coward? Am I really a piece of shit? Am I somebody that just folds when things get too difficult? Am I

somebody that can't see anything through? Or what have you? So, so all of doubts, without me even knowing it, they sat inside of me for the rest of my addiction career, which thankfully I got clean and sober at thirty. So I'm twenty five years clean and sober, which is amazing. And I lived an amazing life now, thank you, thank you very much. But you know what, it's still left with me. And so I put all the drugs in the alcohol down and that's amazing, it's beautiful. Achievements, and

it's great. And I've got two other kids now. My son's twenty five and he's never seen me drink or use, and my other daughter's twenty years old and she's never seen me drink or use. And we've had a beautiful life together. But you know what, there was still that part inside of me that said, are you a coward? It is somebody that can't face up and these questions I needed answered, And are you somebody that runs at

the first sign of trouble? I can't see anything through, you know, And losing that first fight for me was the first sign of trouble in that context, and I had to make a decision deep within myself as to am I going to see this through? Am I going to be who I'm meant to be? I want to see who I am. I don't know who I am. At forty nine years old, I don't know who I am. I thought I did, I thought I did many times I didn't know, and now I want proof. I want

to understand who I am. So I made a decision that no matter what, no matter how terrified I am, I am going to continue fighting and I will win a title because when I win that title, I can prove to myself nothing to anybody else, don't care what it says to anyone else, but to me, I can prove to myself that I'm not a coward, that even though I went through extreme difficulty and and had to walk through fear, I made it out the other side. And and let's see who's sitting there at the other end,

you know, and that was what really important. That's what boxing has been about to me, you know. The whole journey's been about that, you know, and it's just been an absolute pleasure, but in a take in a painful way, an absolute pleasure, you know, to face these fears and to reveal who I truly am.

and your purpose, and you learn about yourself. You know, we always talk about learning through adversity, like you don't learn in comfort, like you not that every day has got to be twenty four hours of pain, of course, but you know, you don't build resilience eating fucking chip, sitting on the couch, you know you don't, like you don't you don't build resilience when everybody's doing everything for you. But that that tenacity and that you know that and

it can be anything listeners, of course. But another thing that I this is going to sound really weird. I'm glad that you hated yourself about your daughter. You know why. That's a I don't want to hate yourself anymore, but because it shows me that you're not a sociopath, because a sociopath wouldn't care. Yeah, the fact that you cared, Did you let her down? Yep? Were you a kid, yep? Were you addicted and somewhat fucking out of touch with reality?

And were you out of yep yep? Doesn't make it okay. But it someone explains it, it doesn't excuse it. It's not a good thing. But that was the practical reality of your life. But then as soon as you got in a space where you were better, you weren't that

person doing those things. It's like everything's clear and you're like, so for me, the you know, turned down the self hate now for sure, because it doesn't fix or change anything, but that the fact that you felt guilty, that you felt bad, that you feel that you let it down or whatever. I actually think maybe some other psychology people wouldn't say this. I think it's great because it means

that on a deep level, you care. And there was a time there where, I know, the death that you were at, I don't think you could have cared about anything because you were too fucked.

and I tried to make amends, you know, for for her life, really, you know, as best as what I could through the years. But unfortunately, you know, about well, I think it's about three years ago now, or certainly about two years ago, she decided to walk away from me again and cut me out of her life. And that was really hard to accept. It was one of those times again of the sort of adversity and pain

that I had to sort of face up to. But actually what it did for me is that it's helped me move to a new realm within myself where I had to accept exactly what you said. I'm not happy about what happened in her childhood, of course, I'm not happy about that at all, and I wish I could change it, but I can't. Have I done everything I can to make amends for that, Yes I have, and you know what, her work walking away at the moment hurts me very deeply, but I have to forgive myself.

I've done all I can to try and repair the damage, and I've had to.

it's like there, what does it say? Bedfellows or some oldie world bullshit? All right, So I want to jump back into you. And so we've spoken about this before, but for those who don't know, so you you had a few cracks at suicide. One of them, you broke your ankle. You jumped off a bridge. What was that bridge again, over Burwood Highway or something.

ever since. That would seem inconsistent with elite sport. Plus plus you know, not feeding your body properly for years and years, plus putting toxic shit in your body for years and years and years, and then you know a few other probably medical things that we might not mention. I don't know. That's more up to you than me. But how on earth did you even?

about you know, like you know, we're not talking about esthetics. No, I just mean we're not talking from an ego point of view. No, you're beautiful. Shout out to all the beautiful people like Nick. My mum would say head like a robber's dog. But anyway, that's what I would never say that though. But so what what was the journey from from? Like or bits and pieces of the journey to get in the shape that you're in now?

And I remember you sitting there talking to me about my relationship with food and how that's something that needed to change and need to change that psychological relationship that I have with food. And you also started helping me to train a little bit, and that's where it all began for me, you know. And I started to chip away at my fitness and my health and slowly but surely, it's taken me a long time, slowly but surely I've

transformed my body. The first transformation was back then, and it happened over about I don't know, maybe a one or two year period, and I lost all the weight that I had on and I was doing a fair bit of running and stuff. And I remember you used to tell me about the runs you used to do and you sort of land somewhere at an airport and had two hours between flights, you'd be out and running around the airport.

Like exercise or food or lollies or I remember the ox when he got clean and inverted commas from gambling working with him at sen and he went from not smoking having like fifty a day, and then he got off those, and then he was having twenty five coffees a day, and then he got off that I don't know if this is the right order, And he'd sit in the studio on air with like a kilogram bag

of lollies. So then it's sugar became the thing. It's like that personality is a motherfucker, because even though you can change your behaviors and your habits, it's just that drive for that dopamine release that you know, you just you kind of just find it somewhere else. So maybe part of that for you now is boxing right.

more healthy. And it's amazing what can be achieved if an addict gets recovering. And this is you know, I need to sort of mention this too, especially with my boxing. One of the one of the superpowers that I have

in boxing is that I'm a recovering addict. What does that mean, Well, it means I'm disciplined, means I'm completely focused, I'm obsessed, and I'm relentless because I can direct all of my energy to it, and I I don't have blowouts on food, and I don't get on the piss because I don't drink, and I train within an inch of its life relentlessly and consistently, and it produces results. The results just come if you do that. And it's my addictive nature that I'm using in a positive way

that's helped me to do that. And as I said, you know at the beginning of this that addictive nature. Isn't it funny that addictive nature has helped me to find that to uncover who I am. Yes, even though I used it for a long time to block who I was, because that's what addictions about. Addictions about blocking facing what I suspect of myself because I suspect that I'm not good enough, that I don't fit in, and that I'm inferior, and so I need to shift what

I think your perception is of me. That's what addiction is. It's shifting your perception of me, so you don't say the truth.

I'm not stressed about it anymore. I'm not. But now so we go all these years later, So you're a recovering addict still with these addictive tendencies. I mean, you're still Mike Hall. Yeah, right. You behave differently, you choose differently. You've got a different lifestyle, you've got new habits, you've got a different structure, you've got a different purpose and a different focus. But still you must have to be a where of not becoming a rational around training and boxing.

And because even that, it's like, I know there was a time when for me training was an addiction in a bad way, you know, like when you said running around an airport. The backstory to that is I got to I had this rule for years that I had to run every day, and I mean every and if I didn't run every day, I would have I don't know what I would do, but obviously got through that, but it was totally an addiction, and I would feel depressed, I would hate myself, I would all of these things.

So I remember flying from Melbourne to LA and I remember not like figuring out the time from when I left home to I got to Melbourne airport to getting on the plane, sitting there for fourteen hours whatever then and I'm like, fuck, I'm going to have about half an hour. Like if I'm not running within half an hour, I'm not going to fit in a run within twenty four hours. I know it's totally irrational, and some people go you, I'm like, oh, yeah, I was irrational as fuck.

So I literally got changed five minutes after I got because I had a layover. I was going to Louisiana, and I had like two hours to wait, and yeah, I ran. I ran out the fucking front door of the airport. I ran through that lax car port car park, just sucked in all the carbon monoxide equal to what

I'd ever consumed in my life. And I ran for an hour and I literally at times was almost just running in circles because you couldn't go that far, you know, I'm running, and I'm like and then when I finished, this is how I know I was an addict. Oh, it was just like this overwhelm of relief and all the anxiety went, so, you know, and then oh god, I've done it now I don't have to do it for and I knew from then I'd be fine because

I've mapped it. Like, yeah, so anything, even healthy things, can become mentally and emotionally unhealthy depending on our relationship with that thing.

know all that sort of stuff. So yeah, it takes a it can be a bit of a job, but it's it's worth it.

Brad Pitt, you motherfucker. But just trying to anticipate that, deal with that and transition into that whatever that is in a healthy way. Like I remember when I got out of personal training kind of officially when I sold, When I got out of all of my gyms, right, I had and I thought I couldn't wait for it because I just wanted to do other shit, And I'm like, oh, if I have to adjust another bike seat or go

three more, two more, one more again, I fucking hate it. Right, But when I got out, I missed it so so much, Like there was just this gaping chasm and all I wanted to do was open another gym. It took me. I'd been doing that for thirty years. Yeah, it's like you need to.

like now four weeks later, absolutely devastated. All they wanted to do was stop doing it. Yeah, now they hate themselves that they stop doing it.

and we're testing our skills. So there does come a time where you know it's it is silly to keep going and the damage and we could cross a line where maybe there's no turning back, you know, in terms of physical damage. And look, I'm continually monitoring that myself, and I've been asking this question myself for a couple of years now, like how am I going to stop? And when am I going to stop? And when am

I going to be ready? And I had to get to that point of just going, well, I don't know when I'm going to be ready, but I just know that I'm not ready yet. And then and now though, I'm moving into a phase where I'm looking for the signs, you know, and and one of the signs is that yes, I've got a fight coming up. On the eighteenth of April, at the Q Room and it's for the state title again, Okay, but it doesn't really excite me, right, But what excites

me is the guy that I'm fighting. Because the guy that I'm fighting has always been two or three steps ahead of me in development. He's what I would call the top of.

to ask these questions. And my youngest daughter, Faith, who's twenty, I got this phone call about month and a half again, I said my dad. I said, yes, Love said, can you teach me boxing? I said, are you serious? She said yeah? I said right, meet me at the gym. Fit Life, Jim Infirnitry Goali meet me at the gym on Saturday morning at ten o'clock and I'll start training it and no winging and any bullshit, okay, dad. So she met me there at ten o'clock the next weekend,

and she fucking loves it, loves it. So I started training her. And then another girl that I fight with, she's a fighter as well. She's forty years old. Her names Jasmine, So Jazzy. We've been through a lot of our boxing journey together, and Jazzy, you know, I wanted to help, you know, sort of technically with their boxing and that sort of stuff. And so I started training Jazzy on a Saturday. So next thing, I've got Jazzy and I've got Faith, my daughter that I'm training on

Saturday mornings. And it just so happens about two or so weeks ago, there's another young girl at the gym, Shane and Jimmy is just turned fifteen years old and just wants to fight. Wow, let's see so much potential in her. She's so much potential. And so I said, well, Shana, you better be here Saturday morning, no bullshit, be ready to rock and roll. And next thing, I've got a team of three.

a lot of development. You missed a lot of just being an adult and making decisions and cooking your dinner and paying the rent and doing all the things that kids like. You missed a lot of that, which is nobody's fault but your own, of course, But you missed a lot of that normal kind of teenage young adults not so young adult development, and so you've almost had to learn how to be a grown up when you were thirty. I was in a time warp. I was in a time warp.

you know, like I'm talking tantrums. I'm talking like screaming tantrums, throwing your mobile phone because they just come out there. And I couldn't believe I had this mobile phone in the end, and Telstra weren't being nice to me, so I smashed my phone. He kicked it down the road and abused everyone that came near me. So, you know, there was all these tantrums. There was just you know, fall in love at the drop of a hat and then be obsessed with people, and it was just it

was madness, you know, madness. I was out of control emotionally and psychological and an image, unable to cope with anything at all in life because I didn't have the emotional or psychological tools or capabilities. And what I've had to do in my life in recovery. So when I say my life in recovery, I meant from thirty to fifty four about to turn fifty five, is I've had to learn how to live in the world as maybe people learned that weren't addicts and seemed to be able

to do it naturally through the course of time. So I've had to relive all of that and it's taking me. I'm about to turn fifty five. Look here, I am boxing and doing what I'm doing, and I still feel like i'm you know, I wish. I wish, oh man, I wish that I could be twenty five again, because I just want to be a boxer and an athlete. That's all I want to do. I don't want do

anything else. Some boxer and an athlete. And in my mind, I still am, but it's going to end because my body just can't keep doing it.

like you are what you are. You're this tough guy that you've owned multiple businesses, you've done well, you've worked in radio, You've fucking won state titles, national titles, You've done all this shit. But when you and I are together, you're almost like the student. It's like fucking mister Miyagi and the karate kid. You just sit there and soak

it up. I know, you know. And I'm not trying to fucking tell you what to do or how to do it, because yesterday I went to you, dude, you are You've been talking to me about writing a book and getting on stage for fucking ten years and you're just kidding yourself and you're never going to do it. In a minute, you'll be sixty and you won't have done it, and the gates closed, and you're like so, and I went, this is what I think you should do for you and you went, Okay, I mean let's

do it. Want sign Yeah, because I don't want to see you waste your talent, you know, like, and I'm only saying that because I know you want to do it. It's not my idea, it's your idea. Yeah. My idea is, well, let's fucking start bugger lugs. And so this is what I'm excited to thank you. Yeah, I know I've been wasting your talent. I'm such a greeting I've been hijacking that fucking talent. But this is what I'm excited talking about.

You know, being late starter is going all right, Well, at fifty five, we're going to open the door on developing Mick as a speaker, just like TIFFs opened the door a few years ago. And she's a different person and like her knowledge, her skill, her stage awareness, her it's like she's made ten years progress in three years.

if you crash and burn or you're brilliant. They're just sitting there, you know. So it's a different environment, it's a different energy, it's a different context, it's a different skill set. But I know, like when you saw that fifteen year old and you went, oh, this girl could be a great athlete because you just know she's got I look at you and there's no one like you

doing what Tiff does. But there's no one you know, And she's got a different kind of energy and story on stage as well, like because she's not coming in and going I'm a gurg at business, right yea, And

so she's got a different angle. But your angle is like everybody is addicted to something, you know, and if you're not an addict, well you definitely know ten so and there's probably four in your life, not necessarily drug addicts or alcoholics, but you know, so I'm excited to see that development, and now that we've spoken about it publicly, you better fucking do the work made.

And I was like, well, that's the best outcome to have some lessons, not fail in the middle of having some lessons and some new environments to have to process.

Now I've got to operationalize those put them into practice, Like you can't get better by not speaking. And that's part of the thing, is that there's that emotional and psychological vulnerability where you are literally opening up to hundreds of people that you don't know, knowing that you might

fuck up. Right, that's fucking bravery. I mean that is coage, you know, And I think that's that's the thing that I put up a thing yesterday which said something like being static in a dynamic world doesn't It doesn't work. It's a problem, right, And the thing is that we do live in a dynamic world. Everything's changing, things, things happen all the time that we don't want to the world's uncertain, uncomfortable, unfamiliar, all that shit, all the uns

as I talk about, that's not gonna avoid you. So you need to know that there's going to be shit coming and you're going to be ready or not. And how do you be ready? Will you train well in this context? How do you train? Will you start speaking to groups? And you might be one out of ten? I talked about my first ever twenty six I was got paid fifty bucks in a timbard to talk to all these blokes. They fucking hated me, like they couldn't get out of there quick enough. I was dog shit.

I got paid fifty bucks and I fucking loved it. I loved it. I'm like, this is the best I knew. I was shit because every bit of while I didn't get feedback. They just brushed past me. And I'm like, Okay, I was crap, but I don't know why. Like with you, Mick, I know I can win a title. I was like, I know I can do this. I know I'm shit right now. And that's not self clothing, that's self awareness. Good now. No, it's like, could I go get a jiu jitsu black belt if I wanted to commit for

ten years? Which I don't, But if I did, Yes, would I be fucking horrible at it at the start? Of course? Would I be somewhat shit in a year? Yes? Would I have some skills an aptitude in two or three yes, you know, and then maybe in five years I'm a little bit dangerous than in ten years I'm a black belt. But I've got to go through either the literal white belt or the metaphoric white belt in your case, building businesses, becoming a boxer, tip, becoming a speaker.

This is a stage, the white belt phases, the phase that people want to avoid because everyone wants to look good and be good. They want to be at the top of the mountain. They just don't want to fucking climb. They want to black belt for nothing. Yeah, it's like, dude, it's like, yes, you suck. That doesn't mean you're a bad human, that doesn't mean you're without potential, But you can't you can't move past that level of skill or

confidence or competence without sucking and without being courageous. Yeah, because it's you know, getting in a boxing ring. You both know, I don't know, but it requires immense courage. Like nobody, even even the champions, they don't get in they're relaxed. I mean maybe the odd one. But you know, I remember watching Tony Lockett one hundred years ago at

some Kilda. I shouldn't say this, but anyway, fuck it, but I could tell you more, but I will say he was very nervous before games and he was arguably, well he's the greatest goalkicker of all time in the AFL in one hundred and forty years of AFL, he's the best full forward of all time. And I would see him spew every second game before the game, so nervous, so nervous. And this was when he was a champion, you know, and like because he was scared or nervous

or all those normal human things. Yeah, then it would go out there and be scared and courageous like encourage It's well, you can only be courageous if you're scared. Yeah, that's right. Like if it's comfortable, well, we don't require courage. If there's no risk, we don't require courage. So correct, Well, it's been a good chat. It's we're an hour in if any parting words, I know we've left you out of a bit, but any wisdom that you.

would be awesome. So if you ever ever you know, up for coming down to fit life in Furniture Gully at some stage, we'd love to have you and we'd look after you.