I'll good. Are your bloody champions. Welcome to another installment of the project. Craig Anthony Harper. I've got a new friend. I'm going to say she's smarter than me, better to look at than me. I don't know if you can say that in twenty twenty five, but fuck it, I said it. And we were just chatting, and now we're going to chat with you as part of our group. Hi, Andrea, how are you?
I don't know. I think you're a pretty good looking Craig. I think we are.
I think we're competing for that title at the moment. I'm doing great. I'm thrilled to be here.
Yeah, I've seen good looking. It doesn't look like this, But thank you. That's very nice of you. And it's good when you treat old people nicely. It's like good karma, you know.
Oh is that what that is? I like it.
Hey, So we were just chatting. One of your many, many things that you've done is extend bar. We'll jump, we'll go back and forth. But I was just saying to you, there's literally a studio three hundred meters from my house, and I've always of kind of you know. Full disclosure I'm being honest, I've looked it up. Gone is that like? What is that? Is that like pilates? Is that yoga? Or is that is that sala? That
is a ballet? Is it some kind of hybrid or ten things before we Firstly, I don't know how many. I think a fair few people in Australia know of it and a lot would know what it is. But what is extend bar?
Yes, so extend bar is a combination of dance and pilates, and I essentially I took my foundation of the two things that I love the most. I was a professional dancer for many years. I segued my love for movement into a career in pilates. As a professional dancer, I used pilates as therapy to keep my body healthy doing many shows at night and many shows a week performing. I really wanted to make sure that my body stayed as healthy as possible, strong as possible, and pilates is what.
Got me there.
And after dancing professionally, going to call EDE get my degree, I was like, I got to get a real job, right, I got to get a real desk job.
I gotta sit be on a desk. I have done it. I have to have an adult job.
And so I was like, okay, let's go into uh, let's go into advertising, because that's creative and I'm a very creative person.
Craig.
I lasted six weeks at that job, and I decided, Okay, I really need to listen to my soul and my body.
And I'm a mover. I'm a shaker.
I like to get in there and I like to move my body and that's what stimulates me. And so I segued my love for movement into plotis. So once I graduated and from college, and then I went right into the Ploates practice and took a year to get certified. Through that, I just fell in love with I fell in love with Ploates, but I was missing my dance.
So I decided to kind of blend the two. I said, what if I can take all the principles and core principles of the Plates regimen, and I can combine that with the freedom of dance movement and what I know to be strengthening for a dance and the the dance body. And so I combined the two and I launched something called extend Bar and it started in a small studio in South Florida. It was just the class that I put on the schedule, and within a couple of weeks it took off, and so I had a wait list
within two weeks of launching the class. And then that's what I said, Okay, I'm onto something here. I need to develop a true repertoire. And then I developed a certification program and then that turned into licensing model, so I essentially licensed the intellectual property to various studios in the US. Then that turned into franchising, that turned into international franchising, and that is how we found our way to Australia. So extend Bar is a great workout, I mean,
and it's not just for women, it's for everybody. I asked Craig in the beginning if he tried the workout. He said, hell no, I said, don't judge until you try it. Craig, I used to train like a lot of professional athletes, like I have linebackers that were doing this workout because you know, it's a lot of balance and coordination and flexibility mobility training. So it's actually a wonderful, wonderful supportive tool for a lot of athletes.
I would look like a newborn fall up the back of the group. That's that is, that is what you don't want to see me trying to do it.
I might have agree with that.
I like lifting heavy shit. That's the end of my skill range when it comes to athleticism. So what year was that first class? That like, when you just had the idea and you did wherever you were in Florida and you did a class and it got booked out? What year was that?
That was two thousand and six. Wow, that's amazing that almost twenty years ago.
Wow. But you know what I love is you and I. Something's quite different, but a lot of things similar in that I was like you when I was a kid. I started working in gyms when I was eighteen, just as a gym instructor before I went to university and all of that. But I realized not too while I loved working in that kind of environment in gyms with people, but I realized I didn't love having a boss. And not that sounds bad, not because.
No, I get it.
It's like I just wanted to do my own shit and they're like, no, you can't, No, you stay in this box. That's not your box. I'm like, fuck this box. I want to look in that box and I want to create new boxes, and by the way, why don't we try it? And they're like no, and which I understand because it wasn't my business. Totally understand it. But from when I was about twenty years old, I was trying to think how do I how do I make dough, how do I make some bank and and not feel
like I'm going to work every day, you know. And so that for me, that's that intersection of what you were talking about, which is what what do I love? What am I passionate about, what makes me feel like I have a purpose? What's fun? Where am I growing and going? And what's going to make some dough? What might be commercially viable? And then in the middle of that creative, commercial self growth experience that there's no sense of work, you know what I mean?
Absolutely?
Yeah, And what you just described is actually the pillars of something called ekey Guy, which is a Japanese philosophy of living your purpose. Right, you just describe that, and I talk about that in my book. You know, that book resonated with me simply because of what you just said. You know, It's like, that's exactly what I did. I was like, I don't want to stay in your lane.
I want to create my own lane, and I want to be able to do this in a way that feeds my soul but also gives back to the community and does something good and worthy and I can also make money at So yeah, that was the same the same drive that you know pushed me to get outside of the box. I was like, well, I don't want to do pilates in this order. What if I don't do exercises A B and C. What if I did
A CMNB. You know, I was always thinking, how can we how can we shift this and change things up a little bit, but also, you know, stay respectful to the to the principles of the method, And that's how Sendbar kind of started. And then it was just working with really like minded individuals, people who were hungry and passionate for the program, for the method, who wanted to
bring us to their communities. Very like minded individuals are the reason that the brand grew was because you know, it teamed up with people that were smarter than me, better than me, just as hungry as me, and helped to get the brand out of out of the gate.
Isn't it amazing when you either? And by the way, everyone, I'm not I'm not suggesting for a minute that to have a job is a bad thing. But for me to go into basically the same environment, do the same thing day in day out, for me, that's not great. So I kind of need a little bit more whatever freedom and risk and vulnerability and all of that stuff.
But to be able to go to a place every day that you want to go to, and you're like, I like, I actually like being here as much as I like being at home, or maybe more sometimes, and where you hang out with people who drag you up. You know, when you know that old saying, you know that saying, if you're the smartest in the room, get the fuck out of the room, go to the next room where you're the dumbest, or the least skilled or
the least capable, hang out with those people. And you know, as I said to you before we started, I grow up. Growing up, I was not gifted at anything, you know, I wasn't terrible at everything. But it's not like, oh, yeah, he was standout athlete or a brilliant musician or an amazing writer, or he's just brilliant academic, none of that. But I also I got very excited about stuff. I got passionate about stuff, and I loved.
Yeah.
I didn't even know what this was, and but I was. I was fascinated with human potential and possibilities because also, which I didn't tell you, I'll shut up after this, because it's really your show.
No, I love hearing this stuff.
I was a morbidly obese kid, right. I was the fattest kid in my school, back in the days when you could say fattest kid in my school. And that for me, and then I lost a whole lot of weight and had this whole psychological, emotional, sociological, physiological kind of transformative experience. But out of that, I went, ah, if I can go from the fattest, slowest kid to a reasonably good athlete just through application and effort and
bit of self control, what else can I do? So I got in shape, which was good, but it more than anything, it like opened a door in my brain of possibilities where I went, fuckety fuck, what else can I do?
I love that? That is the pillar. You know.
Part of what I preach on regular race is exactly what you just said. If you can do that one hard thing, and movement exercise is a very strong foundational tool for that because you don't want to do it right. Nobody wants to. I mean, I teach fitness for a living. I have for twenty years. I don't wake up every day and I'm like, grab the leggings, put on the sports bra.
Yay.
You know, No, motivation doesn't wake me up every day, right, it doesn't. It's the consistency, it's the determination, it's the after effect. It's the feeling I get after I work out that I chase. Right, it's not the actual high of it, of the excitement of putting on my legs and doing the workout, but what that is when you do that hard thing, especially in the morning, when you start out your day doing something you really don't feel
like doing, but you do it anyway. There's that dopamine hit, there's those endorphins that go, there's that little moment where I go at a girl, at a girl, you got this? What else are you capable of today? What else can you do today? And it's those small moves that add up to a big life. It's by taking those little things that you do that you think, well, how will you know exercise in every day change my bank account, or how will you know intentional breathing every single morning
actually meet my relationship stronger? And you think that these things are very minimal, and they're not, because what you're doing is you're taking control over your life. You're being intentional with your moves, and you're actually making a difference, and you're moving the needle.
And that's what it really is all about.
Yeah, I love it. I love it. Did you did you get to a point where you realized as a fitness professional, coach, teacher, mentor blah blah blah, all that stuff that you and I both did. Did you get to a point where you realized, oh, getting in shape whatever that means, or changing a body or is as much, if not more, a psychological and an emotional journey as it is a physical one. Like I've written seven books.
My first book was about the psychology of getting in shape, because I realized I could talk to people about anatomy and physiology and nutrition and progressive overload and all of these science y fucking things, right, but they'd give up after four days. I'm like, well, what's you know? It's like if we've got the best resource, the best program, the best support crew, but you're not doing it. You know. Did you have that kind of awakening?
I did.
I remember when I first started teaching, Within the first year, I said to a friend of mine who was in the industry, I was like, I think I'm more of a therapist than I am anything else at this point.
And it really was.
And I discovered that and over the years have just as you mentioned. I mean it really the mindset is everything. I just you made me think of one of my clients. She's actually somebody I feature in the book.
Her name is Sarah.
She's become a good friend of mine over the last year and a half and she's lost over one hundred pounds with me.
I think she's at one hundred and six right now.
And one of the things that she said which really resonated with me. And let me frame this first by saying, she had every obstacle against her. Okay, she had a very severe medical condition with her eye. She had to have a surgery that required her to lay face down for six months and only get up to.
Use the bathroom.
Okay, So the level of talk about mindset and overcoming and you know, she had every excuse in the book to go, Now, this look what happened to me. I no wonder, I gave all the weight, No wonder, I gave up like and everybody would have said, I get it, Sarah, right, but she didn't. She actually she took one little factor of motivation. I sent an email out to everybody, and she happened to be on that email database talking about a test group that I.
Was doing, and she was like, this is my sign, I'm going to do it.
And her intention, Craig, was not to go in there and go I'm going to lose one hundred and ten pounds. Her intention was, I'm just going to do that thing tomorrow. I'm just going to show up for that class. I'm going to press play on that workout and I'm going to do it. And it's going to suck because I haven't move my body in half a year, but I'm going to do it.
And she did it.
And every day she just showed up, small, tiny little thing, fifteen minute workouts.
Okay, like every single day she showed up.
And then she lost five pounds and then she said, can I lose the ten pounds? Can I lose fifteen and from there on it kind of snowballed. And one thing that she told me, which this is the story I love the most about her, is she said, I you know, people always ask her, how did you do it?
How did you do it? How did you stay motivated?
Like you said after four days when you want to give up, how did you not give up? And she said, listen, when I fall off the wagon, I don't set up camp. She said, I get right back on and keep going. And I was like, that is so true, because so often life we like, we fall off the wagon, and then we're like, let's set up a fire, let's make some s'mores, let's sing some songs, like let's hang out over here, because this is easier.
This feels like we like the failure.
It feels good over here, instead of just going, well, that was shitty, and I didn't do the workout today. I ate crappy today, and that's okay tomorrow. Get back on the horse and keep going. And so she developed the mindset of like, get you don't set up camp. Then I love that because so many times we set up camp, right, we just.
Stay in that.
Fearful excuse zone and we don't let ourselves push forward and press play on the workouts and move our body and do the things that we need to do. And so that's a great mind inside. It's helped a lot of women that I've shared that with. Don't set up pamp, give yourself the freedom and greace to srew up a little bit, but then get back on.
The trail and keep moving forward.
Yeah it's a mindset. No, yeah, yeah, one hundred percent. It's I'm more brutal than you. When people say to me, I fell off the wagon. I go, there's no wagon. It's just you and your choices. I go, there's no fucking wagon. There's just you and your choices. I go, tell me what you did? They go, oh, I, you know whatever. I ate my own body weight in chocolate. I go, how did that happen? They're like, what?
How did I make a choice?
Did somebody hold you down? Was there like? Did people break into your house so at night and tie you to a.
Chair, sit down your throat?
Yeah, let's be honest, and this is not self loathing. This is just self awareness.
I'm like, self awareness.
Okay, you made some choices, you did some things. Now I'm not hating on you. I'm trying to get you to the point where you're taking where you're taking total responsibility in a positive way and a practical, real world way for what you do. So there's no wagon and you're not falling off it. Nice fucking story, But there's you. There's you and your choices, your behaviors and your outcomes.
Right, and you have to own your effort.
One hundred percent. Like when I was a morbidly obese kid, I was one hundred nearly one hundred kilos, which is well over two hundred pounds at fourteen. Right now, imagine that, Andrew, And I'm right now I am eighty kilos, which is one seventy six pounds, and I'm about five inches taller than I was then. Right, And again there's no self
loathing in this, just self awareness. But when and it's pretty tricky, this conversation in twenty twenty five, because we want to be empathic, we want to love people, we want to but also, hey, Craig, if you're eating a thousand calories a day more than you need, this is just science, bro, that's probably not going to end up great.
You know, now, that doesn't mean you're not an awesome human or we don't love you, doesn't mean you're not a kind guy, doesn't mean you're you know, it's just that there are consequences of actions, and you know, so.
That just because we teach our children.
Trying to keep that kind of balance andria of how do I be real world practical, honest, straight with people, but also supporting and loving and knowing that the world doesn't give a fuck about your feelings, and knowing that bad choices have real consequences, you know, trying to keep that I care about you, but also, let's be fucking real, how do you navigate that?
Yeah, I mean that's just what I said.
I typically will say, can we get honest with your effort or on your effort? And that in that same context that you're referring to, which is and listen, life happens, should happens. You're not going to be perfect. There are going to be times that you know, you make a choice that you're not exactly proud of or you don't feel great about.
I mean, we've all been there.
I think it's unrealistic to think that perfection exists every day, right, it doesn't. We don't do that, whether it's in our nutrition, whether it's in our daily choices, whether it's in our parenting or professionalism, whatever it is, we make mistakes, right, And so I think this, especially for women, it's a
self loathing. It's this like falling into this as I said, camp where we just sit down and we're like, you know, coming up with all the self loathing, and we sit there and we let that sorrow sink in on us, and it is it's handcuffing us, you know, it's it's putting you into a position and into a mindset of you aren't capable, you aren't going to do that. You're not bred that way. You're you're not born that way.
You're not that person that you see on Instagram that does those things like And I kind of think that's a little bit of bullshit because I think we let ourselves sometimes overcome our own you know, capabilities. And I think, you know, if you can just adopt the just you know, I have a hat, I say something like, just.
Do the thing, Okay, take action, do the thing.
Stop thinking about it, stop making excuses about it, stop worrying about it.
Just go.
You know, I grew up as a dancer, right and when I was dancing, you know, my my dance teacher would say five six seven eight and then we would go okay, So five six seven.
Eight was your prep. You had four seconds to get your shit together.
It was like five six seven eight, perform right there, hit the mark, do the turn, do the leap, whatever it was, and it it gave us zero.
Time to go, oh, shot, what are the moves or what am I going to do? Or I don't know that.
It just was five six seven eight go And that's something that I work with with my clients.
And like five six seven eight move.
Just stop stop thinking, stop overthinking, and start moving and then get honest with your effort. You know, when you come to me and you tell me I've done everything I've been working out for six months, or I'm I'm you know, I'm getting so organized in my life. I'm I'm changing the way I approach you know, my mindset on A B and C. I'm like, but are you? Because nothing's changing. So let's let's get honest with your effort.
And I think, like you said, it does require some real talk with yourself to figure out what you are really doing the effort that you're contributing and and where the needle is moving based on your efforts.
Yeah, I love it. Yeah. One of my philosophies is if you really want to know someone, pay attention to some of what they say and all of what they do. It's very true action what people do over time. I'm not talking about in a moment because we all fuck up, but how.
Zoom olt Yeah, yeah, exactly zoom and see what they do.
I love that. That's it, That's that's it, that is exactly it.
I think also, people don't understand their own potential. I think that you know, you were talking about what we were kind of talking about, overthinking, underdoing and like not. I think fear and all its expressions, you know, anxiety, self doubt, self loathing, and avoidance, and I think fear jack's our potential. Like as I said to you before we rolled, I'm not very talented, but I'm very good
at getting the most out of what I've got. And I meet people who are more talented than me every day, and they think I'm some high watermark of whatever I go. If only you knew all the bullshit, the overthinking, the self doubt, the self loathing, the insecurity, the ego, all the Craig bullshit that exists that I have to fucking deal with and navigate, You wouldn't think I'm nearly as special as you currently think I am. And I think just knowing that, you know, oh this is scary, and
that's okay, Oh this is hard, that's okay, this is uncomfortable. Great. What if I lean into all that stuff that I don't really like? Because in that stuff that I don't like is where I become fucking amazing.
Yeah, And I think that the game of comparison that is now every day right world that has just completely you know, put the brakes on so much growth for so many individuals because there is this idea just as you said, Oh, Craig has all of his shit together, he's like the most, he's a genius. He's got everything going for him. It's easier for him, it's not easy for me. He's got a leg up on me. And the truth is nobody really does. It's just a matter
of effort and taking action and doing the thing. And if you remove the outside fear. You know, I just saw something recently a podcaster who is like, just get ready to embarrass yourself, like you have to put yourself out there and be ready to get to be embarrassed, to like do stupid shit that is going to make you feel like, oh my god, I can't believe I just put that out there. And that's the same kind of thing in life. You have to put yourself out there.
You have to be willing to take that slice of embarrassment in order to have a bigger piece of the pie, right, you really need to. And I think you know that's why I break things down to more bite sized, digestible, you know, snippets and moves, because I think the feeling, the.
Barrier to entry is so big.
It's like, oh, I can't do all that. The feeling is I have to overhaul my whole entire life. I have to find a new life. I have to find a new job, I have to find a new partner. I have to find, you know, a better wardrobe. I've got to buy a new house or whatever it is. It's like we always think these things are going to fix our direction or our path or our trajectory, and it's really you and I both know that's not what
it's about. It's about the everyday habits. It's about the things that you do every single day that add up over time, that are done consistently, that create the path and the results that you're looking for.
And it's not always fun. It's not always easy.
Yeah, And sometimes, which is really hard to sell as a concept or a product, is it's fucking slow sometimes.
You know what, most times it's not fast. I mean people always I have this woman reaching out to me recently and she asked me again and again, like I want to do what you do. I want the flexibility that you have. I want to you know, how did you build this and how did you get to so many studios.
I'm like, girl, this has been twenty years. Twenty years.
You know.
When I was going after the beach body gig, that took me ten years to lay on that job. And it took me ten years. Every six months I made a phone call to the individual, the producer at that company and said, remember me for ten years before I actually got a contract signed with them. So like, it's just you know, you know, people see that as an overnight thing, and it's obviously not, and you've got to
be patient. But it's the repetition, it's the consistency, it's doing the thing doing the thing, doing the thing, doing the thing, and then eventually you start to feel a little bit of traction, You start to feel a little momentum building, and that gives.
You a little bit of a buzz. Right, That's that's where motivation comes.
Yes, definitely, and being able to keep doing what in the short term doesn't work or do you know what I mean? It's like the first six hundred episodes of this show, Andrea, I lost money, Like, not only did I not make money, and then eventually we got I partnered with an organization called an over Entertainment over here, who have multiple radio stations all over the country, and they're great, they're great partners. But yeah, I mean I
didn't really know, but I believed on knew. I just thought, well, I'm getting better at this. I'm not terrible. I was terrible, then I was kind of shitty. Then I was average, and then I you know, and now I'm not terrible. And but how do you get good at the thing that you don't do? How do you master what you avoid? How do you win over the long term if you give up three weeks in every time, right.
Exactly six hundred episodes.
I love that that's that's that's that's a beast of a project that isn't overnight.
Yeah, well, I I shouldn't even tell you this. I spent fifty grand or thirty or forty grand, I should say on a little studio down stairs, not where I'm at right now. And then I just and I had to pay people to produce an edit and put it together and upload it because I'm too fucking dumb to do all that. And I would say I spent one hundred grand before I started to and not that I mean, I didn't do it to become rich, but I definitely
I would rather make it. You know, I'm like, wow, like it's free for everyone anyway, but I don't want it to you know. But the thing is over time, whatever it is, you know, whether or not it's a martial art, or whether or not it's building a business and an organization multiple times like you have, whether or not it's writing a book or you know, my first book was kind of rubbish, My third book was not total rubbish. You know. My first television interview was a nightmare.
My tenth one was not terrible. It's like, this is the process of getting good is for most people. Whatever it is that you do for the first time, you're going to be somewhere between complete crap and okay. But how you develop mastery, how you develop mastery is just keep fucking showing up.
One of the books I have out here is Mastery. I I preach this and even in my workouts, like
it's it's a simple. It's a way to simplify it, right, because it's an analogy for everything in life, you know, I think especially nowadays, we are so quick to move on to the next we want the next thing, right, Like we can't even watch a one minute video without getting bored, and we are constantly overstimulated, and we are constantly wanting instant gratification and something that hits that dopamine every single day, and that is not realistic to you know,
building and sustaining any type of success in any area of your life. And if you take something as simple as a workout, you need repetition. Repetition is it. Repetition is your is your is your light, it's your spotlight towards success. Repetition is where you learn what you're doing good, what you're not doing good, and how to master it. And we have been of voidant of mastery we are all about. I mean even in like the companies that I work with are like, let's do one hundred new workouts.
I'm like, or we could do five and have them repeat it, because because why would we not.
Like back in the day, we had one workout video, one DVD and we did that same workout for a year and people got amazing results. Why because they learned how to get stronger, and then they learned how to optimize their form, and then they learned how to you know, get for more out of every bit their range of.
Motion, their technique.
Like we we now don't give ourselves the chance to fail and then succeed. We are just constantly trying to throw something new. That's going to be the answer. That's the answer. That's the answer. That's the answer.
That's the answer, you know.
And so instead of trying to find a new workout every single day of the week to stimulate your senses, why don't you strip it down and start focusing on how you can get comfortable with repetition and repeating some things in your life and knowing that every day there is a little gain that happens when you start to lean into that.
Yeah, love it exactly right. And I think because you know, like we spoke about before, it's quite often not fun, quick, easy, sexy, or painless. All things that we love in twenty twenty five. We love shortcuts, we love magic pills, we love quick fixings, we love instant gratification, we love dopamine. We love pressing the fucking dopamine button. But when I eat the salad and the chicken breast rather than the whatever it is, the burger, well, you know, it's like doesn't do it
for me. So I'll have the burger, and I'll start on Monday, and then Monday becomes two thousand and thirty four, right, And then we have the same internal dialogue about the same shit for years, sometimes decades, and then wake up one day and go, I'm fifty, and how the fuck did this happen to my body?
Like, well, where did my life go?
There's a correlation between choices and behaviors and outcomes. You know, I'm not trying to again, not trying to throw shade, but you know that that's that like your life's going to happen anyway. I feel like this is a bit deep and philosophical by the way, it's only seven thirty in the morning over here.
So we're starting not strong.
What time is it where you are?
Yeah, we're four thirty PM, four thirty in the afternoons, just about school chip the time.
That's why you look so good and awake. But that just being willing to you know, just go all right, this is going to take a while. It's not going to be fun, quick, easy, or painless. And that's fine, and and I won't I won't see amazing results quickly more than likely. But also, how do I make this a you know, this habit or this behavior or this protocol or whatever it is that works for me? How do I make this a thing that's now hardwired into my normal operating system versus a thing that I do.
Because I had a conversation with Andrea, and I'm pumped, you.
Know, because that's not sustainable.
Yeah, we're trying to create new neural pathways, new subconscious programming, you know, a new way of doing and being that's optimal for you and optimal for me. Knowing that what works optimally for Andrea definitely why I'm working for Craig and vice versa.
That's exactly right. And you know, it's funny I teach my daughters this. You know, I'm a single mother. I have two daughters, like a twelve year old and a fourteen year old, and I don't live near family. I'm really doing it all on my own and trying to raise these girls to be determined, successful, of strong character and have courage in life.
You know.
And these are the lessons that I am teaching them are the same lessons, which is like you get what you give, honey, you know, and you got to focus on how you can try harder and harder a little bit harder every single day, and that you got to keep showing up even when it's hard. You just got to keep showing up and keep giving yourself that, you know. Future talk is what I always say, is like who do you want.
To be in the future?
And when you have a talk with yourself in the future, and you know, for my twelve and fourteen year old, they're like eye rolling, here comes another lecture from mom. But you know, who do you want to be in the future? Right Like I didn't get to where I'm at right now by just sitting back and like letting you know things happen for me.
I didn't you know.
I had a lot of challenges in my life, and I had a choice to either sit in the closet and cry it out or to buck it up and make some moves in my life. And I decided to believe in myself, and I decided that I wanted to have my future self be proud of the efforts that I made in my life. And that's the messaging that I give my girls, like you've got to wake up every day and figure out what kind of day you're going to have, not let the day dictate to you
what you are feeling. You're going to have to figure out how you respond to challenges in life. And right now, as teenage girls, let me tell you, the challenges are there, their present, and they're much harder than I had to deal with as a teenage girl. And so it's like equipping them with this inner confidence and courage and also understanding that you know, you got to do the thing. You just got to do the thing, and you've got to get through it and it's not going.
To be cozy and it's not going to always.
Be you know, I always say, this is not a rainbows and sprinkles kind of day.
Okay, but you still got to get through it.
And so it's trying to create that, you know, that growth mindset as we talk about, but it's more than that. It's like that strength mindset. It's that empowerment mindset. It's the there's no opportunity for the excuses to float in because you're the person that just does the thing. And so I'm working hard to kind of create that mindset for all the people that I work with, but specifically for my two daughters.
And the only way that people you know, whether or not she's twelve and four nine year old, or you or mail any of our listeners, but the only way that we can individually build resilience is by doing or dealing with hardshit. Right, It's like you can't sit on
the couch eating potato chips building resilience. Like there's like we actually need to go through adversity, through through challenge, through discomfort, through loss, through suffering, through learning and unlearning, like we need to we need to climb the mountain to build that strength and fitness and awareness and understanding.
It's all well and good to talk about resilience, but we need to help people who want to be helped, of course, to understand how that growth happens and growth doesn't. This kind of growth does not happen in comfort.
Oh yeah, yeah, you know what, looking back, I think, you know, when you look back on those times, that's exactly the lesson. When you're in it, it's really shitty and it's really hard, and you're like, I know, I'm going to look forward and I'll be stronger on the
other side, but this is hard right now. But truly, when I look back on those times that brought me to my knees and completely wiped out my world that I thought was so great and I had to start completely over from scratch, I truly am so so grateful for those challenges because I am a different woman. I am a different human being. I'm a different mother, I'm a different friend, I'm a different business owner because I was able to get through that and also figure it out,
like I had to figure shit out. That was really hard and really tough. That up into that point in my life, I didn't have to figure it out, and I worked hard, but I didn't have to figure out really tough shit, and I when shit hit the fan, I did, and looking back on those times, I'm like, I would not be where I'm at right now. It would not be anywhere where I'm at right now without you know, kind of that the world spinning in front
of me and me falling to the floor. And it's that resilience that was built that created stronger character, stronger reserves for me to be able to tackle everything else that comes in my life. And recently just went through another personal challenge and I'm like, I got this. Are you kidding me? Why my armor's so strong? That's what
I said to my friends. I'm like, I've got an armor on, Like I've got like this, you know, this shield now because i have went through the hardship and now I'm like, I'm ready for it.
I'm equipped for it.
Doesn't make it easy, it doesn't mean it didn't hurt, But I just feel like I'm such a stronger person to be able to deal with any of that now because I've learned through it.
Yeah, I love that. I feel like in personal development and you know, motivational psychology and self help and all the you know, the legit stuff and kind of the bullshit stuff, but with a lot of it's very much focused on all things external, right how do I build a better business that people can see or brand, or how do I get more likes or how do I You know, nothing wrong with creating a better body, of course, but again, this is something that people can see and
look at my situation, circumstance, environment, house card, job, money, income, brand, profile, qualifications, all shit that people can see, right, And none of those things are bad. But for me, it's all the stuff that people don't see, that inner world of feelings and love and hate and fear and anxiety and self doubt and self love and values and beliefs and purpose and faith and like, this is where living happens in this internal space, but life happens in the external space.
But we're so externally focused. I think I'm getting a bit deep. You can tell me to shut up, but I feel like we try and resolve internal stuff with external solutions or external achievements decisions down up sidebox.
Yeah, correct, And we are making decisions on those external factors. We're making decisions on what other people will perceive us to be, which is wild when you think about it, I mean it really is. It's it's absolutely wild. Yeah, And it's not an easy thing to let go of right. I mean, we're inundated with that in our daily life, and so it's funny. I just talked to three good
friends today. Three good friends. They're all podcasters, they have a big following, they're in our industry, and we were talking about the book launch and how they could support it just being good friends, and they're all off social media at the moment, and they had they had made
all three of them, like independently. I was like, WHOA, what's happening today, And all of them said they had to make a decision because they felt like it was really affect those external factors were really affecting their internal choices, and so very timely on this conversation, and I, you know, just respected that they had to make that choice. Listen, I'm not going off forever. And they've built tremendous following, so they have a lot of value add there and
it's part of their business. But they're like, right now, this is the decision I need to make in order to support my internal passions and purpose and.
Like what really fuels me. I need to get back to that.
And not making decisions based on the likes, the post the engagement, Like I need to actually do what's more purposeful for me, and they're hoping that will resonate more not only with their internal self, but with their eventually their external audience.
Yeah yeah, I think for me it's so nice slack a financial bank account at times versus our emotional and spiritual bank account. It's like, what, Okay, I'm making good dough and I've got lots of stuff. Yeah, well done me. But you and I both know lots of people with lots of stuff. I mean, and from the outside mineral yeah, well, from the outside looking in, it's all Hollywood, it's all fucking you know, jazz hands. But see that's.
Pretty I love me see them, Greg. That was really good. Actually it was energy, that was full out. I liked it.
I don't want to I don't want to spoil you, but yeah, but at the same time, spiritually and emotionally bankrupt. And I don't mean that in a judgy way, but you know, I see it. I work with these people. They tell me, they go, I know that I'm successful in a sense because the world, the world judges success on things, not an emotional or psychological state or happiness or joy or purpose or fulfillment or meaning. Or equanimity or calm. It's like, yeah, fuck all that, But what
do you drive? How many fund you drive?
What is your house? Look? What are your clothes wearing? What brands are you wearing? Yes?
Not and also not? What medication are you on? How many anxiety attacks do you have a day? How are you You know, it's mind blowing and I don't think that's going to change anytime soon. So it's really up to us to understand what our value is, what we want to feel in terms of value, what is our definition of it?
You know?
What is your purpose? Is your purpose to show off and to become somebody that everybody is in awe of? Or is it to become in awe of yourself? You know, and to feel really good about who you are and what you do.
Yeah, not an easy thing. How often do we get to the top of the mountain and we're like, oh, fuck, it's the wrong mountain. I think it's that mountain over there, or you know, get we get the thing we wanted, and then oh I got the thing I wanted? And now but how come I still you know? Yeah, I had had an experience when I was in my early thirties. I bore you. But I had five different businesses, one hundred staff, and I was doing great and everyone thought
I was doing great, but I didn't feel great. I didn't feel great at all, like I was. Yeah, I was probably the least happy I've ever been in my life. And I'm not saying it was, you know, causation, but it was definitely there was a relationship. It was a correlation, you know. But yeah, so the outside doesn't necessarily or often reflect the inside. Let's talk about the bloody book. You don't say bloody book in the States, but we say the bloody book here.
And you know, I have a lot of old friends, so yeah, we say bloody book.
Tell us about tell us about your bloody book.
And yeah, well it's teed up perfectly because there really is a lot of what we just discussed in terms of how to really optimize your your efforts in your life and to make take control over what you want to do and feel and be in this world. And working with women for so many years as we just talked about, and everybody seems to come to me with the same concerns as we talked about, being the therapist in the fitness studio and what can I do to lose weight? What can I do to feel better? How
can I be more motivated? So it turned into these little mini sessions in my volates practice into coaching, into mentoring, into doing retreats and workshops.
And all this stuff.
And finally I was like, all right, I'm going to just put it into a book. I'm going to put the things down that are these things that have worked for me and a lot of my clients. They're everyday things that you can do. They're simple, easy, less than thirty minutes a day. It adds up to that make a difference, and they've made a difference in my life and so many women that I've worked with. So let's put it down and hopefully it makes a dent in
someone else's life and makes an impact. So essentially seven daily practices that I do. Again, nothing's rocket science, Craig. These are things that you probably have done or at some point in your life, or you've heard of, or it's you know, it's nothing crazy, But when you optimize it and you're intentional with it and you execute, you will feel like an completely different person at the end of it. So it's really about finding the habit formation and leaning into the power of consistency.
So the book is called Small Moves, Big Life. Seven daily practices to supercharge your energy, productivity, and happiness. And is it is it vailable in an audio or will it be? Or yeah, oh it is already.
I just finished recording.
Not yet, it'll it launches October fourteenth, and the audiobook will launch it at the same time. So yeah, just finished recording that. That was a fun That was fun.
All right, So so good to talk to you. You're pretty bloody good at what you do. I've got a couple of are you ready for one or two curly questions as we wind up, I like it, all right, tell me something you need to get better at.
Patience?
Immediate answer patience because I because I am someone that attacks everything very quickly. I have an idea, Craig, and I'm like, let's go, let's trademarket, let's figure out how to do it, let's contact the right people, and I just move. And sometimes that has kicked my ass because I've jumped before. I actually had a real strong foundation to jump from, and I've learned a lot of lessons
from that. But I continue to be challenged in that I need to learn how to sometimes slow down, assess the situation, calm down a little bit, and then take action. I'm someone that just moves very very quickly and sometimes too abruptly. So got to get better patients.
Something that you thank you good answer, Something that you have had to unlearn, Like something that you thought was true, that you maybe even preached or practiced and you've since done, if not a one eighty, a one forty, Like for me, there's been fucking fifty things, but something that yeah, you had to let go of or you realize you might have got wrong.
First thing that comes to mind is more is not more. And I say that in respect to franchise growth. So as I was growing the business, again lean into your first question and patience, I just jumped right in and I found the best franchise attorney. I surrounded myself with the best people in the business and just starting to go out of the gate. And I wasn't quite there yet, right.
I had no idea. I was so green and had no idea what franchising meant and the infrastructure that was required to properly support the studios, and so there were a lot of lessons learned and so would I tell people now when people are trying to either a franchise license or just build their business beyond their single brick and mortar, is like, just lean in to the small.
Really master your market and that specific niche that you're in, whether it's from that local bakery or whether it's an online, you know, retail store that you have before you think you have to expand, because expansion does not mean revenue increase. It means a lot of work that comes with it. And as you mentioned right with your multiple different businesses,
sometimes more is not more. And so I've had to kind of undo that lesson in life in general and start focusing on you know, sometimes you just need to scale back and that is enough.
Yeah, yeah, Okay, the next question, you're going good, I'm giving you a I'm giving you a high distinction. At the moment, I need to give you a thirty second synopsis of my PhD. My PhD is about a thing called metaperception and meta accuracy, which is your ability Andrea to understand the Andrea experience for others. So, in other words, what's it like being around me? So I have to be quite aware of that because sometimes people go well,
you're a bit intimidating. Sometimes people go, I love your stuff, but you swear too much or whatever, right, And some people go, you're great, I love you. Some people go, you're a dick ed fuck off. Right, So all of that, yeah, yeah, yeah, the whole But what do you think? What do you think it's like being around you? How do you think people perceive you? Now this is coming from self awareness, not self loathing. But what do you think the Andrea experience is? Luck?
Yeah, self awareness one of the most important traits I believe in terms of finding my connection with human beings or do you have self awareness? And sometimes it's on and sometimes it's off. I would say from my perspective being around me, I feel like the word that comes to mind is energy. So I feel like I give off. I give a lot to other people in terms of energy, and hopefully that translates into absorption of my energy. And it's not always It's not like this toxic positivity. I'm
not that type of person. But I am energized. I'm energized whatever it is I'm working towards, I'm energized. If I'm having a conversation with you, I'm really energized by it, and I'm energized by life and the opportunities in life. So again, similar to your story, wasn't the most talented, and everything I did had some innate talent there, but I had to work really hard at it, and I
was energized by the opportunity. And so my lafers to try to energize as many individuals as possible to be excited about their opportunities.
Yeah, I love it all, right, last one, So we're going to do a little co kind of thought experiments. So one of the things that I talk about with groups is amongst a bunch of other stuff, but we go, let's talk about the skills, qualities, attributes, habits, and behaviors of high performers. And by that I mean I don't mean olympians and astronauts and people curing cancer. I just mean anyone like you who obviously you're talented, but you've really got a lot out of what you've got to
work with. Right, So, like, my favorite high performer is my mum, who's eighty five and had cancer three times, got the best attitude in the world, Right, She's my favorite. Right, So I'm going to give a few like what I think are really important skills, attributes, habits, or behaviors of high performers. So Number one for me is our willingness to do hardship or deal with discomfort right, which is
a no brainer. Number two would be having an understanding of what success is for us, not what the world says or mom and dad want, or not what culture or social media says, but truly understanding what success means for us. And it probably tags into my third one, which is knowing, truly knowing what your values are so that you can build a life around those values. And when you know your values, that makes all your decisions easy,
well not easy, but clear. Like I've spoken about this too many times on this show, but it seems at the moment every ten sponsorship opportunities I get on this show, and I might say that Nova, who's kind of my boss. They're not thrilled with me, but I have to say no because it's shit that I can't sell and that I wouldn't not use and I would not tell other people to use. Doesn't mean it's a terrible thing. It's just that I don't want to sell. So values, so success,
dealing with discomfort knowing what values. What might you add to that list in terms of what's really important to have or be or know to get the most out of you.
Yeah, well you took most of mine, but the value let me.
Talk about that on purpose. And I like that.
Well, you know I mentioned to you earlier.
With my daughters, I want them to be kind and courageous, right, and I want them to be a strong character. You know, I grew up in a Midwestern house with I say I won the lottery. With my parents, Craig, they were not only there to support my dreams. They kept me humble. They put my feet on the ground. My dad was the kind of guy that would drop everything to take me to an audition. My mother was there sewing my
dance costumes. But they my mom would always also say like, oh, I trained you to know right from wrong like you trained me. She's like, yeah, I wanted you to have a very strong moral compass. And the decisions that I've made in my life, some more challenging others, are based
on my moral compass. And because I know who I am and I know what sits well with me and my heart and the kind of individual I want to be, it helps me to make strong decisions, whether it's in my personal life or my professional life, and that, to me, has been a very strong indicator of where I go, how I move, how I operate, who I work with, who I surround myself with. That is my goal, you know, right,
So I really work from that moral compass. So if you listen to your own moral compass and you can lean into that, I think that's where a lot of power is in finding that alignment of what does and does not work with that compass and where it leads you.
That to me is a powerful tool.
Wow. So I appreciate you super good. The book is called Small Moves, Big Live. Seven daily practices to superchage your energy, productivity, and happiness. And I just put on my radio voice. You're very welcome out now in all good bookstores and shit ones. And it's it's available on audio on audible. It's going to be on audio audible.
I'm not sure where it's landing with the audio, so we'll have to see.
Okay, so the audio is out there somewhere, so just have a little bit of a scooch around. We'll say goodbye off air. But Andrea, thanks for Commen's play on the You project. Really enjoyed meeting you and thanks for connecting with our audience. I love you.
You were fantastic, Craig. I love this conversation. Thank you.