Tiffany and Cook stop being mad at me before we even bloody start rolling.
I don't get it off and get a chance, so I'm just making the most of it.
If only people knew how much you and Melissa bully me, and you bully me. Yesterday I did a podcast with David James, Kevin Patrick Gillespie and allegedly this is what she sends me everyone, Your audio is shit. I'm like, I think that's code for Dick Craig. I'm not sure that your microphone was plugged in. You might have been coming through the computer, not the external mic. That's what she meant to write. But what she writes is you're a fucking idiot plug in your microphone. Do you want to do?
You want me to read what I actually wrote?
It probably doesn't sound as good as what I just said, so you're going to fuck up my whole intro. But go on, What did you actually write?
Actually probably throws me in the dirt a little bit deeper. Your mic was bro which you would know if you wore your fucking headphones that everybody I bought him so that wouldn't happen. What's not on his head right now? Headphone ops.
Oops, I forgot. Ooops, I forgot. I forgot.
It's working right, So I don't need them. I just get a bit hot and sweaty in headphones because they get a bit excited. I did, I did when I did radio, where you absolutely have to wear headphones. You can't not because you've got to listen to the callers who come through. I used to look like a widow because I would have one ear on and one ear off.
But so, apart from the hot and sweaty, why else don't you wear them?
People don't need to hear this.
No, because that's is that in itself was a lie, because I bought you ones that don't go over your ears like that, so they don't get hot and sweaty. So that excuse is completely obsolete.
Sorry, you just cut out. I can't hear you. Sorry, I don't know what you said. Everyone. Sorry, Sorry? Now, why are you grumpy? Or are you grumpy? Like you?
I have not seen much of you lately. You have not been at the gym, You've been away. Have you got a boyfriend?
Got a boyfriend? What is going on?
I'm a famous pianist. I've been planning my upcoming concert, so what did you say about peniss pianist pianist? No, you know what I'm I'm trying to my attempting. No, No, I'm not trying. I'm doing it. I am improving my time management, which I am increasingly realizing in every moment that I live that it is shit. It is My use of time has been terrible, and the more I get better at it, the more I realize it's still terrible, which is testament to how terrible it was before I got better at it.
I've got a question, and I mean this really authentically.
I wonder if, because I actually my vague heading for today's or title for today's chat is the other side of goals, the other side of goals, right. I wonder if you became more time efficient, if you'd be happier, Like I wonder if you were really time and you ticked all the boxes and you've got everything. I'm not saying you wouldn't be or you would be. I just wonder.
I just wonder because I know the times when I you know, like, there have been times in my life where I was super focused, committed, driven, and I'm not saying I always turned out miserable. I didn't, but yeah, it didn't always equate to better.
What do you reckon?
No, I don't know. I think that. Yeah, I think that you need to do it in the right way. So what I've realized that my continuous happening to switch from one task to the next to the next, and just being reactive to that and not time blocking and having no mental and psychological downtime is directly negative effect negatively O my language, apparently it's negative.
You did say you did say happening as well. I wanted to know how.
So as you can say, I'm very mentally fatigued right now, it's at odds. So if I look at what are the things most important to me and what gets most of my time and attention, and then if I look deeper into that which I have been as to the time and attention I have left, how effective is that?
I may as well not even put it into the stuff I'm putting it into, because it's getting the scraps, it's getting the filthy little scraps that are no good because I've all used all of my time and energy and focus on the other unimportant stuff and I'm not and I'm allowing it to be scattered throughout my week, so it's tasks and mental fatigue and all of that.
So I'm just gradually picking up the pieces, putting them in different places, assessing whether or not that works for me, and then going where to from here?
I mean, I think it's an ongoing process, like the stuff that's important to you, and then in relation to or we could say values like values are the things that are important to you or values, goals, whatever, and then you go based on those things that I say are important to me, how much of my time and energy do they get? And then you might off the back of that go fuck all is the answer? So maybe they're not that important, or maybe there's just a disconnect.
Maybe I need to hit the pause button and go I spend an hour a day on this, which is complete bullshit. Maybe I need to scrap that because it's not my goal to spend an hour a day scrolling on shit, but I do so. And I'm not saying we should or we shouldn't. But I think there's that that comes back to that whole thing about you know, I like living sounds cheesy, but living in alignment, you know, from one of a less cheesy wanky term like what matters to me, what's important?
What do I value?
And then based on those things that I identify, is my life and my behavior and my work and my relationships are reflection of that stuff, because that's not a bad stepping off point.
Yeah, And is the stuff that's important to me? Is it still important to me? And have I asked myself that from a place of curiosity not just habit Like I do podcasting, I've done eight hundred and something in the last four years. At times I was doing five a week, and I realized that was a lot of time, and although I wanted to do that many, it was out odds with my other goals. So I scaled it back and now it's two a week. And then I went, do I still love that? Yeah? I still love it.
Is it important? Yes, it's important? Why is it important? Why is it still important? And like I have sat down with myself and on but is it?
Is it?
And is it delivering? Or is it? Or is there parts of it that is still at odds? And then I get to say, yes, honestly, from the version of Tiff that sits here today, not the version of Tiff I was when I started it, and it was exciting.
And.
I knew why I loved it then and why it was important. I think we get used to saying, yeah, this is my identity and it means something to me because because one day when I asked the question, it did.
But also, and you pointed out something really good and really true for everyone, is the thing that was that represented you know, So there was a point in time we're doing whatever it was like for me training people on the gym floor where I trained sixty sessions a week every week, one hour, and you know, being that dude owning the gym, being young, full of energy, connecting with people helping like that at the coal face. I fucking loved it, right, that was my purpose. I was
largely about that. And then one day it's like, oh, I don't love it, but I like it.
And then one day I'm like, fucking hell.
Do I even like it? And then you get to the point where you go, I'm done. And it's not that it's bad, and it's not that doing that work is didn't serve a purpose for a range of reasons, emotional, psychological, professional, and financial. But then you get to the point where you go, oh, I'm different now. I want to I
want to focus on other things. And it's not that it's bad, it's that I'm different and I've changed, and so based on that, you know, and so I think that you know, Like for you, I was thinking as you were talking about what has my attention or what has your attention recently? Is the fucking piano that you couldn't play five minutes ago and now you want to be Mozart by next fucking Tuesday right now. Part of me is like, okay, part of me is like that's
a waste of time. Part of me is like, no, that's awesome because you, at forty one, are doing a thing that you've never done. So I always think I've had this conversation many times where I think, what if, let's say Serena Williams never picked up a tennis racket, right, and at thirty five or forty two or one, she took up Like, I mean, who knows, but if you start a piano at three or four, you could be a fucking world renowned penist. Now say that carefully, Ahaps, Yeah, yeah.
But you don't you don't know.
And it's like I had this realization. I used to think that I was, if anything, probably just very very practical, like quite good at solving problems, quite good at thinking critically, but in really practical, real world, p academic way. And then I did my first degree and I went, well, I'm definitely not a an academic genius, but I can do academia. And now I'm doing you know what everyone knows I'm doing, and it's still not a genius, but oh, I can actually do it at this level as well.
Oh I can be academic.
And I had a realization one day that, oh, I'm actually quite creative because I come up with good ideas. I can write well on the whiteboard. I've written a bunch of books, and all of those things are creative processes. But I always thought of creativity as well. I can't sing and dance or paint, so I'm not creative, you know. But I just wonder about that self limitation around our own.
Obviously, if you had to started playing thirty.
Years ago, you would have been much better at forty three than you will be at forty three starting from forty one.
But who knows.
Yeah, I love the challenge of replicating that experience I had in boxing, where it was Oh, there was this thing that I once thought you could either could or couldn't do it. Like I watched Whiplash. What an awesome film. The dude's a drama. The teachers absolutely brutal. It reminded me of Bryce. And it was the link between going, oh yeah, I thought I was no good at boxing
and coordination. But with the tenacity I had, I won fights and I one titles, and I pushed hard and but most importantly, I came out of one fight in a three month period and my whole mind and world changed, and I found a place where I could change me in every other part of the world. Out of the boxing ring. I could do that by stepping into the boxing ring. That's what's that's what's happening with the piano.
I went, What's something that's an interest that I could that I could get as obsessed with as I did with that. That will also enhance my creativity and some downtime and give me a bit of relaxation and not be the standard TIF punch of people in the face doing CrossFit or you know, doing the hard things. And also, what's something that me and the people like me that I spend a lot of time with what's something that's
just not like them? And what how might my world change or what might I learn in the process of that. Plus the activity is just good for the brain. And whether or not I whether or not I go and do this for ten years or whether I do it for six months, I just thought, I'm going to have a crack and I'm going to see if it's something that takes off, like I love.
That well, whether or not you're playing with Mark Simour on his next tour, I market.
A call soon because I'm the skills are just what I can imagine.
I can imagine I want an on air recital one day. So let's talk for a minute about goals, because I really don't think in all the episodes we've spoken specifically, and I don't want to do a goal setting session, right. So when when I do talk to somebody about you know what they want, you go, what's the thing that you want? So we'll call that the goal or the plan or the intention or not the plan, we'll call that the goal or the desire. So what's the thing
that you want? And then straight away I say, why do you want that? That's not a criticism, that's a curiosity. Okay, so I want ABC cool. Tell me about that. Oh, well, I want it because of this and this and this, And when you get to the reason or the driver or the motivation for that goal, you discover that that's the actual goal. Like the initial goal for me, My initial goal was I want to lose thirty kilos.
That was my goal.
But it was really only my goal because I believe that that would be a conduit. I definitely didn't word it like this when I was fourteen, but I believe that that would be a conduit to lots of stuff, you know, And like I thought, well, I don't know what I thought, but I definitely thought that life would be better if I just thought that, I guess mentally and emotionally and socially and practically that my life would be better. And for the most part that was true.
But it's not about the boxing. It's not about the piano, it's not about the losing thirty k's. It's not about the building a podcast, it's not even about you know, for me setting up the first personal training center in Australia. All of those things were good as processes, but it's about who you become and what you learn and what you understand.
And you know what I love. This is my.
Pseudo medical brain working is like, I'm glad that you're doing something that's cognitively enhancing because you know definitely ain't going to give you brain damage like getting punched in the face. In fact, if anything, you're creating new neural pathways.
You're building your anterior mid singulate cortex because you're doing hardship, you're learning hardshit and that forty one literally, I mean apart from the skills, and you're like, my fingers are aching and got to stretch and I've got to remember all these different things. And so it's a it's a psychological, physiological, and neurological process without getting punched in the face, without having to run in the rain, without having to join a gym.
Do you know what I mean?
It's I love that you are doing something which is at the opposite end of the spectrum. And you know, I talk to people about all the time about this being able to put yourself in a learning situation at any age, you know, and I think a lot of people almost maybe not out loud, but you know, underneath their breath, they're a little bit like, what's the point
I'm sixty one? Or it's like when people said to me when more than five people, maybe eight nine, ten people said to me when I started my doctorate, but when you finish, you'll be sixty one, Like why bother?
You're pretty much dead, you know.
I'm like, ah, well, you know, in five years, I said back then, I'm either going to be dead or alive. And let's hope I'm alive. And I'm either going to be alive with a PhD or alive without a PhD. I mean, I'm still going to be here in five years. I'm still going to be sixty one, and hopefully I'll be a better version of fifty six year old me, you know, And in some ways that is the case, maybe not in all ways, but you know, so there's the thing that we want, and then there's the reason
that you want it, you know. And I think sometimes like how many people set a goal then they get to the top of the mountain whatever that particular metaphoric top of the mountain was, and then they go, ah, this is not it Like that destination satisfaction or lack of satisfaction correlation, Like how many people achieve something and go right.
I'm good. Now, I'm good, I'm done.
Like there always has got to be like it seems like on the the other side of hustling, grinding, striving, working, there's not a lot of contentment or satisfaction.
And there's the transferable skills that I don't think people recognize. Like it's funny sitting smashing away at piano keys, watching a little thing on my phone, trying to learn it. All I can think of is, oh, thank god I've boxed for so long, because this is familiar. This is familiar that you just sit there in a state of confusion, punching away with flailing fingers, going makes no sense to me. But what I do know is if I just keep
moving them, at some point it'll make sense. And I won't even know why, because that's what happened in boxing, because next minute I started rolling and countering and going, shit, how did who did that? Oh? I did it? How? I don't know, because my conscious mind learned what to do. Ah, my sorry, my unconscious mind learned what to do, while my conscious mind just said just stay here and keep throwing hands.
Yeah.
Well, I mean it's the same with we spoke about that recently, you're riding your motorbike when you just got your new, big, fancy, beautiful bike, and you're a little bit you know, learn learnstar a little bit, l plates on your forehead. I mean, you could ride, but then a year down the track, it's like, oh, the same girl on the same bike. There's a completely different relationship and experience and phenomenon happening, you know. And that's why I mean that old kind of I don't know how
accurate it is. There seems to be something in it. The ten thousand hours of practice, whether it's golf, whether it's tennis, whether it's riding.
I mean, I don't know how.
Many thousands of hours I've ridden the motorbike, but probably more than I don't know, tens and tens of thousands. And so when I'm on a bike, I'm.
Fully aware.
Without having to think about where is the class, where is the front break, where is the rear brake? How do I change gears? Did I put on my indicator? How do I cancel my indicator? You know, all of these things that you're like, oh, it's still fucking flashing, how do I turn that off again?
Where's my high beam on?
My lights with and if you're not a motorcyclist, and I think most of our listeners are not, remember with all of this, you're doing all of these things.
So yes, there's a front and a rear brake.
Yes, there's a clutch on the left and a front break on the right, and a rear brake typically on the right foot, and a gear change typically on the left foot, and typically indicators underneath the left thumb, and all of this you have to do while looking straight ahead and taking in every car, every dog, every cat, every human, every traffic light, every corner, every car door opening.
And you've got to do all of this automatically without in invert a Comma's thinking, because if you're thinking about what the fuck you're doing on the bike with all the controls, you're definitely not paying attention to the environment.
How's this on the last long ride? I went on? Beautiful day just sitting You know what it's like when you're just sitting on the bike and like this is the best I am filled with joy, blue skies, no wind,
loving it for hours. You home that night, my garment says to me that at some point, I don't know whether it was the next day or that that night, that it was a highly stressful day, and you can go in and look at your stress graph Whilst I was on the bike and I and that was recognizing that's just my mind happening to be switched on, because.
I think, did you just say happening again?
Happening? But apparently that's a thing. I don't even hear myself say that.
Ah, it's all right, keep going happening.
I'm going to call this the Happening podcast.
I don't blame mom for that's it's a perfect word.
To keep going. Yeah, so you're so your body was going nuts.
Yeah, and that's just that's just that's just focused. That's just because I'm so because you forget that you're looking ahead at all of the things and what might jump on the road, and what where? What line do I have to be on? And where's the bike behind me? And I've got to follow that person? And again, like the indicators and all the things, you don't realize you're
doing it anymore. So you think you're just sitting on a bike looking at the blue sky, going fuck, what a day, and your mind and your nervous system's going, yeah, but where are doing all of these things to keep you alive.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's great, isn't it. And eventually, eventually the more and more and more you ride that that will come down that you know that because you'll eventually like your way. I would think your skill is way better, your writing is way better, and you're probably less anxious than you were.
This is the thing, Like, this is not that there's no feeling of anxiety with that, and there's no I'm not feeling like that's the case, but it's obviously just the workings of my mind. When I'm focused, your brain is on high alert.
That doesn't mean necessarily that you're anxious, but your brain is.
You know.
You think about even when we do a podcast, right, the level of energy and focus and cognition from you and I just rambling and talking bullshit for three minutes where it's like, you know, and then all of a sudden you're like, Okay, ready, set go. I mean it's still I think it's still as authentic and genuine as it can be and as freestyle as it can be. There's zero plan obviously, but at the same time, there's an awareness that it isn't just you and me, Like
even if we had we have much more. But even if we had a thousand people in a room, imagine you and me sitting on a stage and just in front of us there's a thousand people listening, you know, or rod later there's ten thousand people or.
Whatever it is. It's like, oh, that would be well.
That's literally what happens every time we do a podcast, you know, is that there's and I think that while that is not at the forefront of my mind, there's always that awareness. So the performance is an I don't mean performance has in theatrical I mean just the quality of what you're producing. I think steps up a little when you know that it's being scrutinized and it's being able to be that equanimity, that equanomous I think the
word is sorry, I'll shut up after this. But just where you can be on the bike and be calm, you can be in front of an audience and become in doctor Alex's case, typ regularly you can operate on someone's fucking brain with half their half their skull off and be calm. I mean, shit, that's the that's the surgeon. I want him or her who can operate on my rain if I ever need that, I hope I don't, but I want the person who's not stressed.
Yeah, and like it's a good point. We're doing the same thing we'd be doing in a coffee shop. However, be interesting to have a candid camera and see how many more than three seconds pauses there were between a natural conversation between you and I where where we're not there's not part of the mind that is ready to speak when the other person stops, just in case the conversation comes to an end.
One hundred percent. Well, I think that. Do you know Brad McEwan, Brad who used to work on Channel ten. Yeah, Brad, so Braddle's and I spoke before, and it's coming on for a chat's moine. We haven't done one for a while, and I mean he's a talent, he's done lots of mainstream media and you know he was on Channel ten for one hundred years. He's a gun, he's a weapon. And he's coming on for a chat and he's like, what do you want chat about? I go, I don't know,
it doesn't matter, let's chat. And I said, one person I really don't need to think about or plan with, is you you know, the guy that's done twenty years of television and a million hours of radio and interviews,
and you know, that's the beauty of it. And we started, we started talking about what we've been doing, because I haven't spoken to him for like two or three years, and I used to We used to see quite a bit of each other because he trained at my gym throughout four days a week for years and years, right, so we know each other quite well. And he started telling me about I go, actually, can you not? Can you just tell me tomorrow? Can you just tell me
all the shit that you're up to tomorrow? Because I don't want to know? And then you tell me it all again tomorrow, And I've got to pretend that I'm surprised or interested like I want you to tell me. But and I've got heaps of shit to tell you. Let's just do that tomorrow, and let's just go where we go and see what the lessons and messages are, you know, And I mean consistently we get feedback and you get feedback too.
I know that.
People like it when it's it's not like question three, so tif blah blah blah, answer three. Thanks Craig, here's my answer question four. I mean, who wants to listen to that? Rather punch myself in the phrase.
Yeah yeah, And it's it's like for es, especially when the guests that you haven't yet connected with, they'll built rapport with to offer that and have having it, have them have a good time happening to have a good time. Just sort of there again, because this is the Happening podcast.
What's the when we talk about you know, so when I talk about goals with people, we go, Okay, what do you want? Why do you want it? How are you going to get it? And when are you going to get it? You know, timeline. So there's kind of four main things, maybe five what's the outcome? Right?
So what do you want? Goal?
Why do you want it? In a driver a motivation reason, underlying intention? Right, how are you going to get it?
Plan?
When are you going to get it? Timeline? And then five once you do get it, what's the outcome?
Right?
So for you, what's the main There might be a couple, but what's the main why behind.
Deep diving into music.
To broaden my interest and identity in my life experience in regards to my life experience, right? So yeah, to break out of the tiff in the gym, Tips the boxer TIF does physical stuff right, Tip's busy all the time?
Is that for you though? Is that for you? Or is that is that for how you see you or how others are you?
That's well, that's for how I am me, That's how I how I feel. And I really like opening myself up to new experiences and new perspectives. And I realized that I'm in danger of not doing that because I am so busy or occupied in things that are all similar or the same or follow the same path. So what would happen if I try this new thing? What might I you know, four four and a half years ago, what might happen if I just start a podcast? And now look like all this stuff happened?
Yes, and now you're presenting at the fucking New Project conferences other super Stars. That's coming up on June one, everybody. We haven't announced that. You can't buy a ticket yet. It's not on the website. Melissa will definitely kick me in the dick for saying it, but fuck it, I'm going to live on the edge. I'm going to tell you all anyway.
She will go. You know what, she'll say to me, why did you mention it? It's not on the website. People can't book.
I will be emailing her. She will that email see it, don't email Mellily see it.
We'll We've got some real I'm not going to tell you because she will punch me in her face.
But we've got some really good speakers and me.
But you know what I call that, you diving into music is I always say to people. In fact, I think I said to my group, my mentoring group, not last night, but last week.
We do mondays.
Do something unnew, you know, like do something that's just open a door that you would never normally open. Like go to the room we're in that room you're the shittest. Don't go to the room where you're the best. Don't go to the room where you're comfortable. I'm talking about a metaphoric room. Don't go to the room where you excel and you look good. Go to the room where you're a white belt and you're fucking hopeless, and you might learn something, and you might you might grow and evolve.
Like think about, for example, if you take boxing, your room for improvement is there, but it's minimal compared to your room for growth and development, sitting at a piano right, how much you you know? And then along with that all the other great benefits that we spoke about. Imagine if just per chance you rang Mark Seymour in six months Mark Seymour as a friend of TIFFs.
Of course he was. He wrote a.
Song called the Boxer and had an album called The Boxer, and the Boxer of which he wrote was Tiff of course. But imagine if you went, I know this is ridiculous, I'm fucking no one musically, but could I come over and play a song and you sing?
How good would you? Should fucking aim for that and we'll film that shit?
How good would sing?
So you need to learn your song and you need to learn I don't know, maybe what's that.
I know the.
Words around mend me.
You need to learn that.
You need to learn that because that's the it's almost like an Australian anthem.
Well, I'm reading at the moment, I'm reading John Farmer's biography. What a great book, What a great story of again someone who was in the industry but just struggling and not really bloody, getting far and getting jammed in and then bam, he Rode wrote Whispering Or released Whispering Jack and became the biggest selling album in Australia. I think to this day like it's crazy and so inspiring. Yeah, you're just one decision or path or footstep away from
the thing you're chasing. If that's what you want to do.
Well, Yeah it's funny, isn't it.
It's like, yeah, he could have he could have just taken a little bit of a left turn, not a right turn, and he would have been Sadie the cleaning lady guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, little Johnny Farnham who's sang and all our young listeners now like who the fuck?
What the fuck?
And all how oldies Hello, oldiesh hello oldish Hey, put your teeth back in and litten leaning, lean in duhl.
My talk to Mary.
Yeah yeah, it's it's so interesting all of that where you think, man, what if? Almost like those sliding door moments. Yeah, there, where you think on a very very small scale. I put up a post a few weeks ago that I've put up before, and it's not particularly profound or wise.
It's it's mildly amusing. It's got a good message or two, and it's got a bit of swearing in it as almost shit has and it got picked up by someone somewhere and it's got that just that one post in the last four weeks has got nearly a million views. It's like eight hundred and ninety thousand, just that one, yeah, you know, and then compared to what some people get a million in a day, but some people, you know.
And I just think, ah, it's so funny because I've put that up before and I don't know, maybe it had five to ten thousand views, you know, and it's now nearly had a million, And I'm like wow. And it's not because it's exactly the same thing, but someone
somewhere shared it. And now that post has been shared, just that one installment on that day that I shared, I think it's up to like eleven and a half thousand shares, shares, not comment not likes, you know, so and twenty five or Yeah, it's funny how sometimes just something will catch fire a little bit.
Yeah. I was listening to a podcast with mister Beast on It and he was talking about how you know, how you're better off making on it's EA or he said, it's easier to make one great video that gets on whatever two million views or whatever. Then it is to create a video a day and get whatever the equivalent of that total would be on each video. Interesting listening
to different people like that. I've been listening to a lot of audio books and different podcasts that again aren't like I don't want to be a mister beast, I don't want to be a content creator, but it's like, what's how does this guy think? And what does he talk about and what There's always these tiny snippets of insight that you get that, even if they don't apply to you, it can change your perspective enough to make you alter things.
Yeah, and it's interesting because there's this sometimes for me anyway, not big, but a little bit of an internal dilemma, you know where you know where you think, Oh, I could write this post and it's going to be quite blunt, a little bit rude, a little bit, and I know it's going to get traction because there's a bit of a recipe. Right, then I can write this other thing
that I think is quite deep and profound. Then if people might read it and they might take it on board, they might operationalize it, they might do something with it. It could be really powerful and valuable in their life, but four people are going to read it, you know, and like, you don't want to be the like he said, just create something that's going to get two million views
or whatever. And I understand because he's literally talking about building a brand online and all that shit, which he's done. Is the biggest content creator or the biggest YouTuber on the planet by far, and you know, for what he does, he's fucking amazing. Right, It's not what I want to do, it's not what you want to do. But at the same time, you want to be authentic and you want to pull up content that really reflects who you are and how you are and the messages that you want
to share. But also the practical reality is And I wrote about this the other day. I wrote the psychology of fuck right. I wrote a post about that, and it's time and time again proven to me that it's somewhere between five and eight times the response I get if I write the same post with swearing versus no swearing. So if I write a post with no swearing and I get let's say, one hundred responses and I put up the exact same post, we're swearing, I'll get five
to eight hundred instead of one hundred. And you know it's like, okay, what is that about? How much do I lean into that? And I don't swear for effect? Like you know me away from the podcast. You know me on the podcast. The way I talk in the gym, the way that I talk out and about is the way that I talk on the podcast. There's not really any difference, right, But yeah, it's just that it's a
real juggling act. I think when you want to be doing something that is done with integrity and authenticity, but you also know there's a commercial, practical reality to what you do. Like if, for example, or should I say this, No, I'm not going to say it. I'm not going to say that in trouble I'll tell you off there.
I can't. I can't.
What I was going to say is profound and true, but I just can't because someone will get offended.
Do you do you think or do you ever think about or wonder to whatever level of self awareness you have on your current experience, do you ever think about how much your your path might be still influenced by the feedback from creating content, like like I do the same thing. Sometimes I write things that I think are that I feel strongly about, and I'm like, I think this is really I think this is a beneficial insight. Right.
Sometimes well most of the time, I feel like I'm just writing them to me, so I'll read them again one day and learn from it. But it might, you know, not many people might share it or see it or like it or whatever. And I wonder if that subconsciously affects how much I think about that again or try and replicate that, or if it mate really makes any difference at all.
Yeah, I do think about that.
I'm always looking at the stats, the data, and it's really out of curiosity to see.
What lands with people.
I mean, if you have a public page like you do and like I do, and you have a few followers like we both do, well, obviously you want to connect with as many people as possible while not compromising your integrity or values.
But I think you would be silly to have.
A public page and pay absolutely no regard to what seems to resonate with people.
So sun Dryer is probably isn't the great.
Well one of my favorite, one of the favorite things of mine, like in my top ten and I've literally got thousands of whiteboards.
That I've written.
If you don't know, if you're one of the three people that listens to me that doesn't know my Instagram, it's just Craig Anthony Harper, And it's thousands of whiteboard messages that I literally handwrite on my whiteboard, photograph and then put up. But one of my favorites of all time that absolutely died in the ass. I'll probably fuck it up, but I'll remember it as best I can. And you've heard of dolphin free tuna, right? Have you ever heard that term dolphin free tuna?
No?
So supermarkets, you know supermarkets sell tuna. Yeah, And one of the risks is that in fishing for tuna with nets, sometimes dolphins get caught up, right, And so one of the advertising hooks on some tuna is dolphin free tuna or that's the farming process or the netting process, right, So.
That's an advertisement.
But and my whiteboard says something like, if dolphin free tuna teaches us one thing, it's that it doesn't pay to be dumber or uglier and a dolphin and live in the ocean. And my point is that we're happy to kill a tuna. Why oh, because it's dumb and it's ugly. We're happy to eat the shit out of tuna, but the thought of killing something that swims alongside it in the same place place is like so offensive to
people because dolphins are cute and dolphins are smart. I'm like, okay, and tuna, no, they're not okay, but they have a nervous system. They feel pain. Yeah, right, it's like we buy into this anyway. Like I wrote that, and I'm like, this is profound and this is insightful, and people are going to go, oh fuck, yah, really making me think about this.
Nobody fucking crickets nothing.
Like absolutely, And I went, oh, maybe it was the time of day, or maybe they didn't it was the wrong you know. So I put it up with nothing, nothing, and I'm like, what I have learned is that some of the things that for me, and I'm not saying I'm right and anyone's wrong, they're not because I realize sometimes the shit that fascinates me is of no interest in those people. So I've I've got to pay attention and go right, that doesn't work.
I still think that, by.
The way, but there are some things I won't like, there are some things that I truly believe that I won't say on here because I don't think it will not because I'm scared, but because I don't think it will produce a good outcome. There's not many things, by the way, I say pretty much everything I think, but there are a few things where I say, Look, if I said this, is there any upside to this in
me saying this? And the answer is no, there's probably more downside than upside, So be mindful and be aware. And also there's a chance that with this thing that I think I'm right about, I'm wrong because I've been wrong a million times.
In my life, so you know.
And it's like I'm going to turn around. I wrote a whiteboard just before which I'm going to post later, which by the time people listen to this, it's just got three lines and the top line says can you still hear me? Yep? The top line says the reality your reality, The second line says objective, subjective, and the third line says, settle the fuck down.
Right.
Because people think that their reality is the reality, It's like, that's no. They think their truth is the universal objective truth, whereas things so many things that I thought were correct, I discovered I was incorrect. So many things I believed I later found out that they were either untrue or I definitely couldn't prove that they were true. And the problem is that, and we're digressing now. But you know, it's when what you think and what you believe is
very emotional for you, and it's intertwined with who you are. Well, of course you're not open minded about that. Of course you closed minded because you don't want to be wrong, and there's no room in there for being wrong. Therefore I'm right, and I think the you know, when we talk about really evolving and really having opening the consciousness door and the awareness door you've got to go. Do you know what I reckon? I'm wrong fucking thirty percent
of the time, maybe fifty. There's so many things that I've been wrong about. I would be literally unintelligent if I thought that all of these ten things that I absolutely think are true, that there wasn't some room in my ego to go probably not all true, probably a bit wrong or completely wrong some of them. Like this is personal growth. Personal growth is letting go of and being okay with being wrong and incorrect. And embarrassed and a failure, because that's just humanity.
How often do you evaluate? I guess your personal life, you're the time you have away or need a way. Because I feel like I've been on a few holidays the last couple of years, the last two years. I went on a little trip each time and got away, and I feel like you don't. Haven't been overseas or on a big break for a long time. Do you miss that? Do you do you plan to do that in future? Or have you settled in kind of a bit of a did you.
Talk to my mum this morning? Have you been chatting to Mary?
You're going on holiday or is she to go on a holiday?
I took her on and Mary to Queensland a couple of years ago then just when Ron had begun begun his physiological slide.
That was fun.
Bless their little socks. That's a good question. So like, for example, next week, I'm going to the Gold Coast. I'm going for two days and staying in a beautiful place looking at the ocean. And I know that's not a holiday, but it's a little mini holiday and I'm by myself, so I go there, I talk for a bit I'm away for forty eight hours or so, I'm working for half a day three four hours. So I do have little mini sabbaticals there, and I have quite
a few of those through the year. I will say that full disclosure, full awareness, or as aware as I think I can be. The last five years for me, with work with podcasts, with corporate, with you know, UNI has been very It hasn't had a lot of that kind of balance. At the same time, I don't get very very gratefully. I think this is more. I often say I don't have great genetics, but I feel like I might have pretty good genetics in that I don't
naturally get very depressed or anxious or super worried. So I think even though I am business a business, even though I am even though I am happening.
Does sound ridiculous when someone else is it.
Even though even though I'm busy, busy, there's not a lot of stress attached to the business.
You know.
But having said that, I feel like I'm justifying a case in a court room.
Your it interests me. Right. The other day, I think it was last Friday, in the middle of the day, I got this my bottom lid of my eye just twitching, twitching, twitching, twitching to the point for hours all day until the evening. It's the point where I was googling, what what I've got this fucking eye twitch? What's was my eye twitching? And it's like, ah, stress, anxiety, underslept, caffeine. So it
was all the negatives. Oh and then that night I went to sleep, woke up after an how it stayed awake all night, didn't sleep, And I was like, this is funny because I feel good. There's a lot of good and there's been a lot of excitement lady lately. Maybe that's a version of stress. I think when you're always a bit amped and excited, stress on the nervous system of some form. But I was like, it's interesting that a couple of symptoms align and tell me you
could be under stress. But psychologically I feel fine, and I perceive myself as I'm in a really good place. I'm like, oh, well, what's true? Which is true?
That? That is a good point. That is a good point.
I think I probably bullshit myself sometimes I don't feel like I do, but I must.
I must if I'm being honest.
And also, yeah, your body knows like Your body doesn't make shit up. Your mind does. Like your body is just truth. Your body is just it information, you know, bio feedback. That's that's not an opinion or an idea.
That's just data.
Now, whether or not you ignore the data or pay attention to the data, you know, and that data could be Wow, my Wii looks like Pasciona. Maybe I'm dehydrated, or I haven't had a pooh since late January, or or I've had, you know, twenty skin cancers cut off in the last five years, you know, I mean whatever. You know, It's like your body's always telling you stuff.
You know, if you check your heart rate in the morning and it's normally sixty and today at seventy, well you're probably stressed or anxious or under recovered or underslept or a combination thereof. Because your heart rate is not an opinion. Your heart rate is just data.
You know.
I am currently back down to fifty two beats a minute resting since not doing stupid intensity every single day. So I kind of go for that style of training now every maybe two or three times a week. And yeah, which is interesting because you know, I told you as soon as I've got to Tazzy. It dropped. Soon as I've got timlays it dropped. I was like, what am I doing wrong? Well, fucking you've been saying your training is not recovering for a while, so that's a positive.
I think it's good. I think all the stuff you're doing is like you're doing new things, you know. I just think it's great for us all to for a range of reasons to you know.
Depending on your situation and flexibility and all of that, but if possible, you know, do new things, try new things, have new experiences, have new conversations, go into new rooms. You know, be bad at something, be happily bad at something, be bad, be terrible, and then go I'm fucking terrible, but I'm going to get better.
Like that's the that's the excitement. Yeah, you know.
It's like I love training people who've never lifted a weight and you get them in the gym. They're fucking hopeless, they're terrible, they've got no strength, and you're like, here's the great news. One, you doing okay, Like this is the of course, just shit at this, of course. Two, here's the good news. You've got way more room for improvement and growth and potential and development than me. You know. It's like this is the beauty of doing new things. Yeah,
and improving oneself. It's always good to chat to you, Cookie, you'd be good. Keep practicing the piano, keep feeding the cat and the dog, and I'll see it soon.
Helps