#1688 Choosing Hard - Harps

For those of you who would like to get a little more involved, if you wanted to, you could go to my Facebook or our Facebook page, which is just called the You Project Podcast. It's a group. There's no hook catch agenda, there's no on sell upsell side cell. In fact, we don't let anyone sell anything. I don't sell stuff on there. We just post the podcasts that

are up. We have discussions around what's going on at typ Central, and you are all free to ask me a question or suggest ideas or topics or theme for shows or potential guests and all of that. So the new Project podcast page is on facing. You can do that now. I wanted to talk to you about the idea of why taking the easy option is often not

a good idea. And in a world where easy is very popular and comfort is very popular, and convenience is very popular for understandable reasons, because who the fuck wants hard when we can have easy? I think the question, though, is what is the consequence of choosing easy over the long term if I keep hitting the easy button, If I kept pressing the easy button. I want quick, I want easy, I want comfortable, I want familiar, I want

no pain, I want no risk. I want to choose the shortest route between me and the outcome that I want, the one that involves the least effort, the least energy, the least risk, the least courage. I want that. And while we probably don't say that out loud, that is true for many of us. Of course, of course, if there are two ways to get their one as easy,

one as hard, we'll take the easy one. Now. So too, if there's a hard option and an easy option for me and they both produce the same outcome, of course I'm going to produce I'm going to choose easy as well.

But the truth is that it's in all the choosing of the easy over the long term, choosing the easy and the short term that over the long term becomes problematic because when our focus and our attention and our energy is all about finding the shortcut, the quick fix, the magic pill, the instant gratification, the panacea, you know, the top of the mountain without the climb, to speak metaphorically, then one we tend not to really get there. We might get there temporarily, but to also what we do

is we deprive ourselves. We deprive ourselves, I should say, of the opportunity to learn and grow and evolve and adapt and develop resilience and understanding and awareness and confidence and competence which comes through doing hard things, consciously choosing hard, and consciously choosing not reckless hard, not stupid hard. We don't want to put ourselves in harm's way or do something that is incredibly risky, a little bit riskier, and

they're not bad. But we're not talking about being reckless

or stupid. We're talking about an intelligent or a smart hard where I know, for example, I'm going to go to the gym and I'm going to do these hard things, and I might have some sore muscles and every now and then I might get a minor injury, hopefully not, but I'm going to go to the gym, because I know that there is a huge amount of evidence and data that suggests that if I go to the gym consistently and I work against resistance and I do hard

things in an intelligent and structured and systematic and consistent way, over time, I will build strength. I will build fitness, I will build confidence and competence. I will improve my health. I will lower my blood pressure, I'll boost my immune system,

I'll build more muscle. I'll be physiologically stronger, and also I'll be mentally and emotionally stronger because I've voluntarily done this fucking hard thing that at the time quite often is not much fun, and I've kept doing it, and I've kept varying the program and progressing the workloads so that I'm forcing this adaptation to happen. And I am consistently and consciously choosing to get uncomfortable and do something

hard on a pretty regular basis now. And I'm just using the gym as an example, But that same kind of adaptation, that same principle, that same protocol of doing a hard thing and growing and learning from doing the hard thing that happens at the gym, that happens in business that happens in relationships, that happens with finances, that happens in academic settings, that happens in sporting context in

training contexts. The same principle is that if I intelligently, systematically, methodically do something that's hard, with a plan, with a structure, with a reason, with a purpose, then we tend to produce better results, typically in terms of just the outcomes that we produce, but also we become better along the way, become we become a better version of ourselves. I know that for me being the morbidly obese kid and then starting the whole process of doing shit, that for me

was incredibly hard. You know, going for a run the first day that I ever consciously, voluntarily without anyone trying to coerce or coax me to go for a run. I was fourteen years old and I was morbidly obeseent it was fucking horrible and hurt, and I think I covered about five kilometers. I think four kilometers of that was walking. One kilometer was a horribly slow jog. I was probably carrying thirty five kilos more than was suitable

for my body at the time. But I do distinctly remember getting home and feeling fucking great mentally and emotionally that I had done this thing. And do you know the other thing was and I don't know if I did this intentionally or just happened to do it, but I didn't tell anyone. I didn't tell anyone because I didn't want to draw attention to it. But I didn't tell my parents, didn't tell my mum, dad, I didn't

tell my school is for quite a while. And then and then I just kept doing it and every day and you know, and this is no revelation, and there's nothing like mind blowing in this, but just the consistency of every day doing something that for me was hard. You know, I knew that I ate too much food. I knew that I ate the wrong food, and I

knew that I ate too much food. And we're talking about in the late seventies here, And of course I didn't fucking understand anything about anatomy or progressive overload or exercise or nutrition. In fact, not a lot of people did, but I definitely didn't. But what I did have a

vague grasp of was energy expenditure. You know, what I was putting in energy intake, energy outs, and that balance, and I knew that if I moved more and ate less whatever, that looked like that very simple model that I had, that very simple, uncomplicated idea that I had in my head. So it was not that it was complicated. It was a very simple concept move more, eat less, but at the same time not easy to execute. Like you think about walking up a steep hill. It's not complicated,

but it's hard as fuck sometimes. So you know, we take one step after the other, we head in a certain direction, we can see the top. We know it's going to be two hours till we get to the top. It's going to require eight or ten thousand steps or whatever it is. It's going to be hard, it's going to hurt, it's going to be painful, it's going to be uncomfortable. We might get some sore feet, we might get out of breath, we might strain a muscle. We might not enjoy the process, But what we will enjoy

is the outcome, which is we did this thing. We got to the top. So it's a lot of the shit that we need to do in terms of growth,

personal development, improving success learning, developing, evolving in business. In the personal growth space, even I think, and this sounds weird, but even spiritually, you know, with that discipline of meditation, if that's part of your practice or prayer or service, you know that having a purpose bigger than you, you know, being of value, being of service to others, like a lot of the stuff that we need to do, you know, when we talk about self transcendent self actualization, which is

becoming the best version of us, you know, or a much better version of us, moving on that part to self actualization where now I'm really using my talent and my potential and my gifts and my genetics in an optimal way. But now I'm moving beyond that, where I'm using all of that stuff to serve others. Well. While that is, while that is great, and that is a very noble aspiration, at the same time, that actual journey

is often anything but fun. It's not fun. It's worthwhile definitely, it's transformational, definitely, but in the mind it's not quick, fun, easy, sexy, or painless. And this is the this is the idea you know, of choosing hard. I've said to I've said

to you before on this show. You know, I loved the idea of doing a PhD and if not for almost really, if not for like some unexpected events, you know, me going to Monash University Brain Park, which is the neuroscience neuropsych lab that I'm doing my PhD, and meeting some people there, and I actually, before I'd even thought about doing my PhD, I was asked to come there and talk to the group, talk to the lab, talk to the PhD students, talk to the you know, the staff,

the team, a faculty, the profs, you know, and I just shared to them about my work and my my job essentially, which was at that stage and still is helping people change, helping people think better, do better, create better. And obviously I was coming originally from an exercise science point of view, and I was coming from a very

hands on experiential point of view. I was coming from a space of you know, nearly well at that stage, I guess thirty five years of training, coaching, teaching based to face conversations, and so a lot of my ideas and habits and protocols and practices were self taught and evidence based in that sense that my my gyms were my classroom, you know, my athletes and my clients were the students, you know, and it was. It was all that and anyway, that was awesome and that was beautiful.

But then so I got this opportunity to do a PhD, and my ego loved that idea. My self esteem didn't know if I could do it, but my ego thought it would be amazing. And of course, other than just my ego, I really wanted to do it because you know, I thought I would learn and I would grow, and it certainly wouldn't be a bad thing to be a doctor of neuropsychology or psychology. It wouldn't probably hurt the career. I can't remember exactly because it was over five years ago.

Now November one is my five year mark. My PhD so a minute away. Oh wow, only a few days away. Interesting November one, twenty twenty four. This is October the twenty seven, twenty twenty four, as I record this. My long winded fucking point is this. I started my I started November one, twenty nineteen, and I remember going into the university. It's a separate the brain Park is not on the main campus. It's a separate area, a whole separate area. It's across the road from the main university.

And what looks like a scientific lab building CSIRO, A part of that, the Turner Institute Brain Park, a whole bunch of a whole bunch of smart people doing smart shit. Almost almost on day one, I wasn't regretting it, but I was absolutely doubting, absolutely doubting and fearful, and part of me thinking what the fuck have I done? And I'll be one hundred percent honest and say that for definitely, for the first three or four months, I one hundred

percent believed I couldn't do it. I struggled to read academic papers, you know, that kind of level of research, to understand the language of the vocabulary, to understand certain concepts, because I just wasn't It's just like, you know, I knew I wasn't dumb, but I knew that I didn't

know that language. Like I literally finished my last degree in two thousand and two, which was what is that seventeen years earlier, and I did an undergrad degree in excise science, and the the chasm between that degree and what I started, I can't adequately explain to you how big that gap is. And so no one was the problem. I was gonna say I was the problem, but not really the problem. I was just overwhelmingly inadequately ready and prepared for that. But you know, you can't get good

at what you won't do. You can't get good at what you won't own up to. And so I spent three four months, you know, kind of reading, kind of planning, kind of writing bits and pieces, trying to map out what would be the next four or five years of my PhD journey, but really oftentimes trying to figure out how I could get out of it without being shamed and embarrassed because I just I was terrified. And I don't say any of this to impress you at all,

because I've just told you how unimpressive I am. You know, it just for me, it was such a steep learning curve. I was so bad at it. I was so bad. I wasn't afraid of asking questions. I just didn't even know what questions to ask. But it's in the middle of that where you just, you know, well, I met some really good people who were amazing, and I humbled myself and I went, I've got no fucking idea, I don't know, can you help? What do you think of this?

I'd show them what I'd written I'd show them my plan, my rough kind of plan for the research that I needed to do. I didn't really even understand, honestly, I didn't even really understand what a research project, a PhD research project meant. But guess what, So you jump in, you either sink or swim up. You step up or you step away. You step up or you step down, you roll up your sleeves, you fuck up. You know,

you be okay getting embarrassed, and it's okay. You know this is But I can honestly say the last five years, you know, when like I started, it's fifty six, and this is one of the things I talk about a lot. How typically now I'm just saying typically, not that it needs to be this way, but typically most people at fifty six, when I started my study, most people at

that age are on the slide. Most people are cognitively, perhaps creatively, and definitely physiologically declining at a reasonably rapid rate compared to say, when they were thirty or thirty five years old. Things have started to accelerate. But as I've said to you many times before, while the chronological fact of aging is inevitable until we don't age, which

is when we die. And while chronological aging is an unavoidable constant, what is not an unavoidable constant is the rate at which our body and our brain and our mind and even our creativity ages in inverted commas. And so you know, as I'm sitting here recording this to you, I'm I feel better. I feel physically, mentally cognitively that is more. My brain feels like it works as well as it ever has. I mean, I don't feel like it works well for sixty one. I feel like it

just works well. And it's very hard, borderline impossible, of course, have objectivity around that because it's me assessing me, which is kind of fucking ridiculous. Nonetheless, but as as objective as I can be, which I admit is not very because it's the Craig experiences subjective. But I feel like my brain works well. I feel like I'm as creative as ever. I know that I'm more productive. I know that I'm getting more done. I know that I'm still

learning and growing and evolving. I know that as a speaker, I know that as a creator, I know that as a podcaster, I know that as a writer, I know that as an educator, I am better. I'm not hanging in there, but that better In inverted commas, that only happens by choosing hard, That only happens by optimizing. What I have to work with. What I have to work with is the genetics I was given. What I have to work with is the resources I have at my disposal.

What I have to work with is twenty four hours a day. What I have to work with is the knowledge and the skill that I have, and the competence and the confidence. They are the things that I have to work with. Now you have the same You have twenty four hours a day, you have a certain level of skill and competence, and you have particular genetics, and you have things that you have at your disposal to use.

Now you and I are similar in that. But what really matters is not we have what we have to work with, but rather what will do, what we will do with what we have, and what gets in the way.

I truly believe this that what really gets in the way of people optimizing their talent, optimizing their time and resources and potential and skills and all that shit, and optimizing their body and optimizing their brain is just that they won't fucking do the hard things that create those awesome outcomes because we live, You and I live in a world that is predisposed to look for fucking comfort

and convenience. If you're listening to this anyway, not the whole world, I don't think, but certainly, certainly those of us who live in a world in inverted commas where we're lucky enough to have iPhones and the like, and computers and tablets and to be able to listen to old bastards like me just bang on. I could be wrong specifically about you, but most of my audience, you know, we have we have, you know, so much potential, so much possibility in terms of the things that we have

to work with. But also we are so enamored with, we are so in love with convenience and instant gratification and magic pills and quick fixes, which is why all of that shit sells like hotcakes pun intended. You know, when when you choose to go to the gym and do something hard, that's you leaning into the hard. That's you saying, well, look this is what i've got to work with. I've got this time, i've got these resources

at the gym, and I live in this body. I'm going to go to the gym and I'm going to do something that's both smart and hard. And the byproduct of that, if I keep doing the thing at the gym that is both smart and hard, my body will change. And when I change my body, and this is what people don't think about too much. When I change my body, I'm also changing my habits and my behaviors, and my thinking and my confidence, and my emotional state and my

brain health. My cognitive function improves when I lift weights, when I do cardio, when I changed my busiology, there's a psychological and an emotional benefit. But that only happens when I do the hard thing. When I started. If you get bored of my stories, just tune out. But when I started Harper's, which was my personal training centers that I had for twenty five years. My first one was in nine and nineties, so thirty four years ago and I was twenty six years old, and I remember,

you know, getting up every day. Firstly, firstly, everyone nearly everyone who I spoke about the idea of setting up this standalone personal training facility when there weren't any. There weren't any in Australia. There there were people doing bits and pieces of training or coaching, but in terms of a standalone, commercial, appointment based personal training facility, there weren't any.

To my knowledge anyway. Nine ninety and nearly every body that heard about it or that I spoke to or sought advice from you regarding business stuff, regarding marketing and branding and you know, just setting it up. I didn't know. I was just a twenty six year old gym employee at the time. My business knowledge how to turn something, how to take an idea in my head and turn it to a real thing in the world. There was about a million steps missing that I didn't really have

a grasp of. So I asked a lot of questions, and while some people were quite encouraging and supportive, even those people were kind of I could tell they doubted that it would work. And I don't blame them. They weren't actually negative. It's just that here's this twenty six year old ex fat kid who's trying to create this thing that doesn't exist. And by the way, there was

no personal training industry. There was no regulation, there was no qualification, there was no insurance, Like it wasn't even a fucking thing like there was no personal training profession, and so I'm trying to create this thing. Of course it would have happened. I'm not saying I invented personal training globally, but I didn't. I'm trying to create this thing. I'm trying to build my own business and brand and thing.

And I made more mistakes in the first year of operation that I'd probably made in total in my whole life up to that point. When I say mistakes, just things that I tried that didn't work. But the beauty of trying things that don't work, and being okay with trying things that don't work, and being okay with fucking up and being embarrassed and looking silly, all of those things that are hard, all of those things that are uncomfortable,

is if your ego can deal with it. And by the way, my ego had to deal with it because I'd signed the lease, i'd bought all the equipment. I couldn't fucking go anywhere. I didn't want to go anywhere, but I'd backed myself into a corner, which for me made me just work my ass off. But if you're prepared to fail, fall down, look silly, be embarrassed, not get the result you want periodically, and then keep stepping up,

keep stepping up. Then guess what, In the middle of all the fuck ups and failure, you learn and grow and evolve and adapt. Then you become a fucking superior version of what you were before you went into that process. And this is the gift. Like the gift is not what you get at the end, the gift is who you become along the way. That's truly what I believe.

I know now that while I'm not a genius and I'm not the best at anything, I know that I could almost go into any environment and figure it out because I've been figuring it out for the last thirty five years. I'n't had a boss for thirty five years. I haven't had a regular income for thirty five years. For thirty five years, I have had to solve problems on a daily basis. And that first year for me in my own gym, where I had no management skills,

I had no leadership skills. I was dealing with the counsel. I didn't know how to have a conversation with the bayside counsel. I didn't know what questions to ask, I didn't know how to answer their questions. I didn't know how to have a conversation with a lawyer or a real estate agent or an accountant without looking like a fucking idiot and without being scared of looking stupid. But I had no choice. I had to do all of those How do you get good at those conversations? How

do you become a black belt in communication in that context? Well, you start by being a white belt and being real bad, real bad. Did I look in competent? Yes? Did I fuck up things? Yes? Did I probably look like a moron? Definitely? I probably did well. Definitely. Did Did I know how to market myself? Did I even undertand what that meant? No? I didn't. Did I have any concept of customer service? Not really. I was a bit cheeky, I could have conversations.

I was a little bit likable. I guess that was maybe my saving grace. Not everybody liked me. Of course. I didn't know how to employ staff. I didn't know

how to structure a business. All of these things that I learned, all of these things that I got wrong, And then I did better, and then I did better, and then I did better, and then I eventually got right, and then I eventually got a level of confidence and competence, and not in all of those areas, but in some areas close towards mastery, where you go, oh, this thing that I was fucking terrible at, I dived into the deep end of the hard pool, and now I'm pretty

fucking good at this. And I'm not good at this because I've got a big ego. I'm not good at this because I'm a genius. I'm not good at this because I'm more talented or better than anyone. I'm good at this because I did hardshit NonStop for fucking ever, and now here I am. And you and I live in a time getting a little bit on my soapbox, aren't I? But I truly believe you and I live

in a time where people just don't fucking persevere. People do a little bit of hard and then go it's too hard, or they go, I tried, it didn't work. You didn't fucking try. You didn't really try. You did three days or three weeks or three months of something in the context of your life. That's not trying. That's opening the door and then shutting the fucking door. Trying is just getting back up day after day and month after month, year after year, and just and yes doesn't

mean you're doing the same thing that doesn't work. But you're grinding, you're making decisions, you're learning lessons, you're unlearning things that hold you back. You're choosing your own beliefs, you're choosing your own operating system. You're courageously and consciously identifying your own values and then building a life around the values. That is, the things that you say matter to you. And that is hard as fuck. It is hard,

It is uncomfortable, it is not fun. Many times, even on this show, I've had to do things that were hard because of my values. I've turned down well over one hundred thousand dollars in advertising and advertisers on this well over probably towards two hundred thousand dollars in potential sponsorship on this show because they were brands or products

or services that didn't align with who I am. And that's okay, you know, but that shit is hard because you go, well, that money would be good because I've got a pative. I've got to pay my lise, I've got to pay me, I've got to pay bills, I've got to go to you know, I've got some expenses, and in the moment you go, well, what would be easy is I just say yes, thanks, I will advertise for that our Coho brand. I will, sure, I will, but I can't. Well, I can, but I won't, you know,

and so and again. Then it's in that living like we talk about living an aligned life. If I'm in a room with one hundred people or one thousand people, put up your hand. If your values matter, every hand goes up. Of course, put up your hand. If you want to live a life that's in alignment with your values, every hand goes up. Put up your hand. If you're actually doing that, fucking nobody and the hands that do

go up are probably bullshitting some hands. Maybe maybe I'm being a bit harsh, but you know what I'm saying. What I'm saying is the idea of having values, the idea of living in alignment with my values, the idea of being authentic all good, But the idea of it isn't. The reality of the process. The idea of it is easy. The process of living that fucking life is hard. But it's in the courage that we find to do the hard thing that we be come fucking us two point zero.

If you are one of those people that is in love with easy, comfortable, and convenient, I tell you you are living in a self built prison because that comfort one day, that comfort that we choose, that will bring us undone choosing comfort, we think it's a good idea, and it might feel like a good idea in the moment and now and then comfort great, by the way, But when we are when our default setting is comfort, when our default setting is convenience, eventually that is going

to fuck us up. Because when the shit hits the fan, and the shit will always hit the fan, when the bad things happen, when the hard thing happens, when the catastrophe happens, you are fucked because you have no skills. Now. You can't survive in the discomfort because you always choose comfort. You can't thrive under pressure because you always choose easy. It is so much about deciding what is the best course for you, not only based on what you want to do, be create, but mainly perhaps on who you

want to become and how you want to be. I knew that I wanted to build a platform to do what I'm doing now because I love the idea of sharing, connecting, bonding through this, through this medium, and I wanted to be able to, you know, share my thoughts and ideas with people who wanted to listen. I know a lot of people don't want to listen. I don't blame them. It's all good. And if I have you know, obviously I want thousands of listeners, because it's I need to

pay the bills. But you know what, if I add ten listeners and they got something from it, then in a way, that's worth it for me. Right. So there's that kind of that, you know, the practical reality. But then there's my philosophical you know kind of and I guess spiritual and psychological drivers. That is, I want to do something where I'm connecting with people. And I knew that and I was very clear on that, and I started a podcast and it didn't work, and then I

started an another podcast. I had a podcast called The Australian Fitness Podcast. Then I did another one with Francis Leach and Bianca Chatfield called We Got Nothing. Then I did another podcast with Tommy which is Tommy Jacka called

The Craig hub Show. And all of them, you know, they were okay, the production, everything was okay, but I knew that I also needed to build something that if I wanted to sustain it and grow it over time, it also needed to be able to be financially viable, because I can't do seven podcasts a week and get all these people on board and create all these expenses without at the very least breaking even. And so the reality for me was three failed podcasts, which probably equaled

somewhere in the ballpark of two hundred episodes. And then, as some of you already know what I'm going to say, the first six hundred or so episodes of this I lost money. And that's painful and that's choosing hard. And after the first hundred you might go, well, fuck up, you did one hundred and you did the shows before. That's three hundred in total. Mate, you gave it a

good crack. Or after two hundred episodes of two ip L three or four or five, you know, and fortunately for me and hopefully you, depending on what you think of the show, it started to catch fire. It started to work. We started to get listeners, we started to get brand awareness, we started to have people talking about us, We started to get sponsors, we started to attract more attention, which was great, and I'm eternally grateful. And there's no

ego in this. There's just awareness. There's awareness that I had to fucking grind forever because I'm not that creative genius. I'm not that uber talented dude. I didn't have a big brand. I had a bit of a brand. I had a bit of a profile, but I'm not and have never been and will never be famous per se. And so for me, getting bums on seats, as we call it in inverted commas, is just a matter of being relentless and doing the hard thing over time. I

built a studio downstairs at my house. I'm upstairs now in my office with a different setup, but I've got a purpose built. Essentially, it looks like a radio studio downstairs, which I spent tens of thousands of dollars on and that, you know, I didn't recoup that for maybe I don't know, six or seven or eight years. And all that's good, and I'm not saying I'm not terrific. I'm not. But there's just work to be done, and there's commitment to be made, and there's sleeves to be rolled up and

there's discomfort to be immersed in, you know. Same with my first speaking gigs, My first speaking gigs, my first paid one. I was twenty six years old, and I won't bore you with the story game, but I was no good. It was in a timberyard. I got paid fifty bucks fifty dollars to pay to talk for an hour, thirty five years ago. So I was no good. They didn't enjoy it. But I left there and I knew. I didn't know, actually, but I thought I might be

able to get good at it. And even though it wasn't an amazing experience, there wasn't great feedback, and I certainly didn't kill it. I had an inkling that I could get good, or that I could develop, that I could be better. One of my next gig, second or third gig, was at a gym in I think it was High Street Paran called recreation. Was for a group of Vic Fitz students or fitness students who were doing I think a certificate three. It was called in fitness

like a gym instructor course. This is pre pt courses and so for And I spoke to them and I was terrible. They couldn't get out of there quick enough. I was terrible. I was terrible, and I did from then till I was about thirty, from when I would say twenty five twenty six, maybe my first gig was twenty five anyway, mid twenties. But I would say for the first five years, I was somewhere between terrible and okay, somewhere between a one out of ten and a five,

never more than a five. But I saw growth, and I started to figure it out a little bit, and I started to understand how to build rapport with an audience. So I started to learn how to get up and be less terrified. I started to learn, you know, the right combination or the right mix of stories and information and humor and interaction. And I realized there was a science. I realized there was an art to speaking. It wasn't just about the shit that I said, but rather how

I said it. It was about timing, It was about reading my audience. It was about can I make them laugh? How do I create energy in this room that people don't necessarily want to be in. And you know, literally hundreds of times where I was somewhere between uncomfortable and terrified hundreds of times, and I reckon, I reckon. It took me until I was thirty or a little bit older, thirty one, thirty two before I wasn't terrible. I wasn't terrible. But again, that's the whole white belts a black belt,

isn't it. How do you become a black belt, either a literal black belt or a merafot or a metaphoric black belt. You you go and do hard shit. You choose hard. You go and you hang out with people that are better than you. You go and hang out with people that will drag you up. You train with the guy or the girl stronger than you. You play

tennis with someone that's better than you. You hang out in a group where you know that socially and or intellectually they might elevate you rather than drag you down with bullshit. Choosing hard is not the handicap we think it is. Choosing hard is actually one of the best decisions you'll ever make.