Goody Champions. It's HAPs, It's Tiffany Cook, It's Brianna May, It's Sasa, It's the Bloody You Project. Who else would it be? Where else would you be? Hi?
Tiv high harps Happy Friday?
Oh fuck so happy? It's Friday, bursting out of a fucking flannel. In fact, I don't even have my flannel, and I'll put on my because Brianna's fucking glammed right up. Unlike you and I, who look like we just got out of the hay shed.
We're in insecurity central now. She rocked up and we just hung her heads in shame.
Look at her like fucking miss will just swans in. I'm wearing my formal everlast T shirt, which cost nine bucks at the outlet fucking factory.
She's quite Melissa like, isn't she.
She's a little bit Melissa like Melissa works with us, Brianna.
She she's the actual boss of both stunning porcelain dole. Brianna.
I'd like to point out that I've got tracky pants on and like literally an old jumper.
I'm wearing my.
Slippers, this old fish up, this old thing.
You can't see me from below, but I'm quite cozy if I want.
You to use this as a primo reel, because people are going to listen and go, oh, what are they talking about? Then they're going to see the primo reel and go, oh my god, those two ugly motherfuckers up the top.
Stop it.
About you.
This might be I have to share a lot of people do mention and I have. I have very fake teeth, and they are in fact fake because I went through my years of having like, I knocked them all out, and so I've got these porcelain, beautiful teeth because I knocked them all out and I spent high school having know I shit, you not like gummy shark, no teeth fifteen sixteen years old. So when people comment on my porcelain teeth, I have to share that I.
Earned these teeth. I earned them through a lot of hard yaker.
How did you get your teeth? Well, if you were Tiff, I would the stand because TIFs a boxer, But how did you She's knocked out a few of her own, not her own, but other people's because she's like that, how did you lose your teeth?
I'd really love to say it was something cool like that, but it was not. I actually fainted. I think I had the shower too hot when I was, you know, in the shower as you do when you're a teenager. You're moody and you're in the shower for ages trying to avoid your parents, which.
Is exactly what I was doing. I'd had a fight with.
My dad because I'd been out drinking, doing the wrong things. Fainted coming out the shower and went down on the side of the bar, and so it was actually very traumatic. My dad found me. He heard a loud noise, couldn't get in, found me unconscious on the floor. There was blood, there was teeth. I just had my braces off, so he was just like, fuck, like, just got my braces off.
I had perfect teeth.
And then I spent the next four months doing like full on reconstruction of my face, going to high school with no teeth, no lip.
They had to stitch my lip back on. It was a hole. It was a thing.
Oh my god, that is that is Yeah, that's traumatic, that's melodramatic. There's a bloody mini series in that. There are how long between that and when you were back to kind of you know, some semblance of normal where you were happy with your gob and your teeth and to go out in public.
It was three months of full on not having many teeth in my mouth at all, and then it's honestly been the last since then. So it's been about fifteen years until I just got them done this year before I got married.
Wow. Yeah, well for what it's worth from one bogain to another. Although you're a glamorous bogan, they look fucking fabulous, so well done.
Thank you, And it was a great party trip.
When I was younger and clubbing, I could just knock them out when guys were giving me the he begbi's, I'd turn and knock my teeth out.
And that you got rid of it.
Wow, that would yep, that's yeah. You could just say no, but all right, there's that. Also if your teeth are very good, have you ever had any significant work done?
No, No, I'm very lucky. I've never had braces or anything. They've always been quite straight. Grew up in a lolly shop too, so probably should have no teeth left.
Wow. I know Beattie Harps has got like one. I got one feeling for one hundred and twenty two year old man. My teeth are not too terrible either.
I've had a few feelings, I'll tell you that much. They just look straight. Cosmetically they look good, but if you get in amongst it, there's a few bit of porcelain in there.
There's a few issues where.
It's called yeah, a bit of mercury too. Going to get those silver ones out, apparently you.
Get that shit out of your God, that's going to kill you, Brianna. So I don't have to read some not that it's boring, but some bio that's on a website tell my audience a little bit about you, if you would be so gracious.
Of course, other than being a bogan with beautiful tea, I would say mostly, I'm a student, and because I'm
a student, I love learning. I love understanding humans. I've been someone who's spent a long time studying, and that led me down doing lots of different degrees and being quite disappointed actually, as somebody who loves learning, to find myself in all of these tertiary spaces, bored shitless a lot of the time, and quite disengaged, although I wanted to love learning, and then that led me, because I love learning so much, to being a teacher and I was a high school teacher for quite a long time
and unfortunately have joined the droves of other disillusioned, disheartened educators who have left the system. And while I was in the system, I sort of saw the same reflection back all these kids who started school with such a love of learning, and I could almost see every single year like that genuine curiosity just dying.
And I almost couldn't blame them.
Because as the educator, as the teacher, I was kind of bored by the curriculum. I was stressed, I was feeling uninspired, and I just made a cheeky comment to a lot of my teachers when I left. To my teacher friends, I was like, oh fuck, I'm just gonna have to build my own school, because I actually loved teaching more than anything in the world. I love the students, I loved the deep conversations we had, and I felt
like the system was doing a disservice. So I made a joke that I'd build a school, and that's actually what I did. And I started teaching around mindset emotional intelligence, and I really wanted to help people to learn how to think and how to manage their feelings and to ignite love love for learning again too.
I love it well. We talk a lot about thinking. My PhD is in metaps, better awareness, meta accuracy, which is all around, you know, kind of thinking about how we think, thinking about how we think, thinking about how others think, theory of mine, and thinking about how others think about us or how we are perceived by others
and why that matters. It's a really like what's interesting is And I apologize to my listeners who've heard me talk about this too much, but I'll keep a brief But most people don't truly think about how they think or why they think the way that they think, and what the origin story is for their worldview or the window through which they view the world, Like why do I think like this one? And two? Does it serve me or sabotage me? And three? Can I change it? For?
How you know? It's like, as I've said many times, us three are in the same chat, but we're not in the same experience. Not good, bad, not better or worse, just different. So tell me about how did you get clarity about designing? And this ain't a sales pitch everyone, by the way, just if it kind of sounds like I don't mean it too. I'm just curious around because when people say to me the same thing, like what do you do, I go, well, I'm about eighty percent student,
about twenty percent teacher. How did you decide what to put in your syllabus or your content and what to leave out? Knowing that if you've got twenty people in a group, you've got twenty different backgrounds and needs and personalities and learning styles, how did you start to put it all together?
This was a process, I have to say, and as someone who spent years doing curriculum and course building and learning how to build rapport with so many different students, putting something together for my school was one of the most challenging things I've ever done professionally because of what you just said, And so I think the first thing that I considered was not so much what I'm putting in it, but how I'm delivering it, because I think
that's a huge piece that educators or teachers, podcasters, content creators often miss is how is this going to be received? How do we get people even engaged in learning? Because I don't know about you, but I remember some professors at UNI they could be.
Talking about the most fucking boring thing.
But if they were an engaging person and they knew how to articulate it in a way that was engaging, I would listen to anything with the right person communicating it the right way. So I actually was spending a lot of time thinking about how do I make this engaging, no matter what the content is, so that people are coming like with learning in mind, And for me that actually meant I mean, there's so much online learning now and personally, I was a teacher during COVID, and it's
not to me, it was just so disengaging. It was so hard to keep students engaged. So I went more back to the old way in person, in person teaching and learning, and for me personally, I just thought that was so much more engaging. But then with what to put in it, I did see and I'm sure you'll resonate with this in the personal development and I'm that space.
The personal development space, it's almost like there's two modalities or two schools of thought, and you've always got that sort of like mindset NLP, change your thoughts, what's your thoughts? The cognitive behavior therapy, the mindset, and all of those tools that we can use, and I saw those as very very very helpful and very foundational, especially if I was looking through the lens of what mindset do people
need to learn? And so I was looking at that, but then I could see that there is a time and a nuance where those tools become a weapon, and they can be a little bit toxic, almost like don't think bad thoughts, don't think.
You know, push that away, put that away.
And so I didn't want it to be all that, and that's when I brought in the other content, which was more around the emotional intelligence of knowing what tools to use and when and knowing when to feel your feelings as opposed to when to override them in instances
where it's needed. And so I sort of built this curriculum where I wanted to give lots of tools, but then also the understanding that sometimes tools become weapons, and the real emotional intelligence is knowing what you need and when and why you might be using some and why you might be resisting others. You know, I was somebody who really resisted all the emotional stuff. I was like, let me do the mindset. I can do the mindset,
that's easy. But emotional stuff was a little bit more challenging to me, and so it was again, why am I resisting this type of learning and thinking? And so I've put all of it in a curriculum, but also with the intent that people learn when to apply certain practices and when to drop them.
Yeah, I love that. Well. Also, the thing too, is, as you were alluding to some of your professors, you probably also had other people who were talking about super crucial, important relevant stuff in a really fucking, horribly boring way, Like you can have the best content with the worst delivery, and everyone in the room has switched off. And we've had obviously I can't say who, but you know, over six years, I've done probably i'm going to say seven interviews.
You definitely won't be one of them. But the people that I interviewed were brilliant, and they'd done brilliant work, a couple that everyone in everyone would know, like high profile international guests, and they were mindlessly, painfully boring, and I thought, I can't put that up. Nobody is going to listen to that. It's not going to do that guest a service or us. It's actually bad my brand.
And I was so disappointed because they were And then other people you get on and you're like, oh, like I've said to Tip or Melissa, who kind of works with us, I don't know. I don't know about this guest. I'm like, it's you know, because I've never and I read about them and I'm like, ah, and they're fucking incredible, Like they're you know, they really like they're when I you know, the things that you look at, well, what have they done and what have they done academically? Do
they have any credibility to talk about this stuff? And I'm like, oh, it's a bit skinny, it's a bit light on and I don't know if this bloke or this girl or the oh and then then they're twenty six times better than me. I'm like, all right, shut the fuck up, ups and just where you know where, all of a sudden, I'm a fucking idiot. They're a genius. And I was thinking, I hope they're good enough for
my show. You know, they're too good for your show, you dick kid, you know, And there's that well think about you know, like think about like at the moment, I'm working with a couple of academics who want to get in front of corporates right. So I've got a
lot of academic friends and non academic friends. And all of my academic friends are PhD level and beyond, and they're smarty pants, and not all of them, but the ones I'm talking about, and I'm trying to help them to get in front of a non academic audience and build rapport and connection and trust and respect and be a bit funny and tell some stories and share some of their knowledge in a way that resonates with a group of people who don't want a lecture, like even
to get them to understand what I'm talking about, you know, because in their lane, they're brilliant. But you know, it's like you take a runner and chuck him or her in the pool and they're drowning. And these guys are like brilliant runners, but they can't fucking swim. Well, dude, you need to be able to do it all. You need to be able to swim, run, ride, punch, climb, skin you know as well.
And I think this is a huge piece that I saw also within the education system. I would witness this quite often, and I always thought, and I don't know if you know that in high schools and most schools
throughout Australia at the moment. They do like streaming, so they'll have, for example, like the top set and that's what they'll call them, the top set kids, and then the bottom kids, and they'll use this language, which to me was quite heartbreaking to hear some kids call themselves the dumb class, because you know what they what identity does to it's on that later in life and I'd be like, oh my god, no, please don't call yourself
the dumb class. But I remember having conversations and debates. I was senior English, and so we had debates, and I had one year the so called quote dumb class, right, And I shit, you not these kids academically they didn't they didn't do crash hot. But I have never met a group of students who were so charismatic, so emotionally intelligent. They knew how to build rapport with me. I enjoyed hanging out with them more than.
The staff room. Most of the time.
They were hilarious, and we did debates and they'd get really emphatic and they would really bring like so much charisma. And I said to all of them, you know what, when you leave this school, I need you to know that you are one of the most intelligent sets of kids I've ever met, and you are going far so far because of that skill. And to me, I just think this day and age, content is out there for everyone. Information is over, There's so much information. AI can do
it for you. But if we don't teach people that skill of building relations with other people, of building connection, of storytelling, of knowing how to connect with people, They're going to be in strife. And so I feel like it needs to be a skill. You just mentioned, getting people to understand the skill and the art of human interaction and rapport. I feel like that needs to be really spoken about.
And I think, yeah, I love that. I completely agree. But I think also, Breanna, you know, in our culture, for better or worse, we really have academic intelligence on a pedestal. I'm not even I'm not I'm not intellectually brilliant at all. I'm not academically brilliant at all. I'm not brilliant at anything, let's be honest. But what I mean is there are so many people who are, you know,
great communicators, amazing communicators. They can read nonverbal communication, they can build a poor when academics, they can see shit that other people can't. They're creative geniuses. They can make shit with their hands. It's fucking mind blowing. My training partner finished school at year ten. The guy lift weights with every day and and you know, you could give him seven fucking code hangars and some tape and a pillow case, He'll build you a fucking house. Like, you know,
like he's just so smart. Like like intelligence is a spectrum. You know, it's it's, it's it's a bunch of things. But in our culture, we don't recognize or celebrate different kinds of intellect and intelligence and gifts. And we you know, down to the point where I understand it and I get it, but I kind of hate it where we rank people's intelligence with a number. We go, WA's your number, and if you're this number, you're a genius. If you're
below this number, you're handicapped. Now, yeah, right now, And look from a you know, from a psych point of view, I understand it. But at the same time, it's one of those things. You know, this is a weird Harrison, But it reminds me of putting people on a stage. And I come from a bodybuilding background, owning gyms all that shit, you know, where we put people on a stage and we literally rate them entirely on their appearance, and we go you're first, your last, you're the worst.
What's that doing for people's self esteem?
You know?
Yeah, And that's with adults.
That's with adults who have chosen to be there, and they maybe have a little bit more of that understanding and prep. Maybe they've got a mindset coach and all of that. But when you're doing this with kids from a young age and it's in the edge, what you just said is so heavily perpetuated and inseminated through the education system that there's this real fear of being wrong. And obviously, like you said, there's a nuance. We need to know where we are we tracking well, do we
have literacy and numeracy behind us? We need to know those things for sure. But the weight and the leverage that we have in our system and our society is just, in my opinion, and not helpful at all.
I want to talk to you about. So you work with coaches, You train people to coach other people, and you coach people, gift coaches people like coach people. We all are in a similar space, like there are certain people that can get all the quolls, as you know, and tick all the boxes and meet the requirements, but what about what about working with people who just don't
have it? You know, It's like I can go do all the singing lessons, but well, tiff things I can actually sing, but said, yeah, I would like to hear this me No, no, but whatever, Right, I don't know, like I'm never going to be I can do all the training, but I'm never running one hundred meters in
ten seconds? Right? What about the people that come into your courses where and of course there's always just room for general improvement and all of that, but you like, apart from the content, the knowledge, the meeting the requirements, sticking the boxes and passing the course, for want of a better term, where you're like, oh, fuck, this person has a personality that's tough, Like how do you address that? Because you can't really teach someone's self awareness.
I think this is where I've actually had this conversation lots of times, because I've had people say to me, I don't think I'm that person. All these people that
just have it, they're so charismatic, they're so confident. My perspective on that is that charisma is a confidence thing, and confidence and charisma is actually learned and it is there are skills, whether people realize that they're conscious that they're probably unconsciously doing that thing where they just know how to build rapport, They know how to walk into a room and have people listen, their personality is a
lot more personable. I would say there is a very unique set of skills that most of those people have, and I do think that a lot of it can be taught, it can be improved, and there's lots of prompts that we can give people to encourage self reflection.
But I would argue that those people, those people that have got it, when we think about those people, they're usually very confident within themselves because they've put reps in in something, meaning they've probably got a lot of emotional resilience, which again I have a gripe about what we're doing at the moment in the system that is ruining resilience. But a lot of people that have that factor they've
got confidence from reps. They've got the reps from having courage and having the resilience to put themselves in the ring again and again and again, and because.
They've got that inner confidence.
They show up with a different body language, they show up with different I patterns, they show up with different they just show up in a different energy. And that is what we call charisma. Somebody who is really aligned in the way that they speak, move, act talk. We pay attention to those people, and I think that that is something that we can teach others.
Tell us about You just said something about the system kind of not destroying resilience or not kind of helping people be resilient. Can you expand on that?
So I've heard of examples. I'm no longer in the system, but I work with a lot of teachers and a lot of different schools, and I hear of things where we're taking, for example, in junior sports, taking away any scores because everybody's a winner and taking away the medals, or in the drama play, we're not having the leading
role anymore. Everybody gets a lead role. I just think, can't we give kids in a safe environment the opportunity to lose like a winner, Like, can't we give kids the tools and the options to actually practice losing while they're in a safe space. Well, we could also say to practice life. Yeah, because Guess what when you're a grown up, you're fucking losing.
Guess what. People are going to hate you for no reason. Guess what bad shit's going to happen. Guess what. Life's not fair. You know, it's I mean, this is yeah, you're right, it's doing it the right way. But you know, life gives no fucks about your feelings. And even when I you know, when I've worked with lots of athletes and stuff, but I and even when I'm working with people who might be let's say a little bit emotionally fragile. Of course they take that into account, whether they're athletes
or just you know, general public. But I say to people, look, I'm more interested in your long term health, happiness, performance, resilience outcomes than making you feel good for three minutes. Like, I don't want you to feel bad, But my job is not to make you feel good. That isn't my job. My job is to coach you, mentor you, empower you, equip you, upskill you. So you're a fucking weapon and you don't need Brianna, Tiff or Craig. You're just a fucking weapon, right, Yeah, Yeah.
And that's what I think.
That's the move at the moment, because there is and it's a great thing again, there's nuance and gray areas. It's such a good thing that we've got emotional and mental health at the you know, we're bringing more attention to it. But sometimes what we've done, and I saw this in the system, and I thought, oh my god, we're actually going to make them more fragile in a place and a society and a time where they're actually they are very fragile because of social media and all
these things. And we're saying, take away all opportunities where they might feel anxious, take away all opportunities for them to fail, take away all scenarios for them to feel bad, because these you know, fragile little snowflakes that shouldn't be shouldn't have to be put through that. Parents who are now saying if their child has.
Failed to test, well, what did the teacher do wrong? What did the teacher do? What is the school doing wrong? All of these things?
And I just think I think we've gone about it a very interesting way.
Well, I think we're just perpetuating maladaptive behavior. And you know, like we're perpetuating this kids who are coming out ill equipped for I mean, yes, we've got to love them. And you know, it's like it's okay to say to your kid, you came last, but guess what, I love you and you're amazing. Like it's you came last, but it's okay, I came last. You know. It's like, yeah, you know I was. You know, I literally came last at school. I was a morbidly OBEs school kid, right,
and so I literally came last. But for me, and that's not that it would be the same for everyone, but I came last constantly, but it was like, for me, it did build resilience, it did build understanding, It did, strangely, over time, inspire me to not be the way that I was because no one was going, oh they're there, are you? Okay? Nobody? And you know it's okay because the bottom line was Will Craig, someone's coming last, and
today it's you. That's okay. It won't always be you, you know, and I think that that, you know, as long as kids still feel love, safe, needed, valued, supported, of course there's that. But yeah, well it's and so did I read also that you did law? Did you do a law degree as well?
Yeah, yep, what happened to that. Oh, I don't know what I was thinking. To be honest, I started, like I said, I think when you finish high school and it's still the same, you're choosing based on your ego. You're choosing based on what the teacher said would be the best also the best look for the school based on your grades. And I actually really wanted to do
something that was a little bit more creative. I liked music, I liked teaching, I liked psychology, and I remember a few teachers being like, well that no, like that would be a waste sort of thing. And so I did law, and yeah, I found myself five years into a degree that I didn't like.
And also, again.
I have to say, there was not a single professor inside of that degree that inspired learning. And I was starting to think, because as somebody who did love learning, where are these professors getting their communication and teaching skills? How do you become a professional and teach in a tertiary way, in a way that puts four hundred people to sleep. And so I wasn't being inspired, and I was thinking there's something wrong here the education. This is
the highest point of education. Most people were watching basketball games So I was born in the university degree, honestly, drank my way through my law degree, and then finished up with this degree where I'd done really well and I actually didn't know stuff all about law. And then I started thinking, wow, I have parroted back, done very well academically, been uninspired the whole time, left none the wiser had my first I remember my first day in
a law firm. I asked my partner, or I asked the colleague which firm, Like, which court case do I take this too? I didn't even know which jurisdiction to go to, and I had just finished my law degree, didn't know whether it was a federal case a state case. Couldn't figure out that out for myself. But I had gotten through and done very well and been uninspired the whole time. So yeah, change there, But it did actually
really activate in me this. I want to be a teacher who makes learning fun, and I want learning to be the point. The point is learning and curiosity, and I'm really grateful for that degree, to be honest, Yeah, do you think I mean?
I don't know the answer to this. I have a suspicion I think there would be a lot of professors who don't think it's their job to inspire people. I think they just think it's their job just to share the content of the course.
And is that not a huge problem?
Well, it is, it is. But I think they're like, well, if you need me to inspire you, then you're in. You know, I'm not, I'm just playing the devil's advocate. But I but I'm with you. And I lecture at university when I finished my first degree, and I but more.
I mean, yes, I wanted to inspire them, but I also I just wanted it to be fun, because I fucking I don't want to stand up there and lecture anatomy and physiology and biomechanics, and you know, it's like, it's so, how do we how do we make this practical? And how do I tell stories in this? And how do we make it resonate? And honestly, it was fifty percent for me and fifty percent for them because I wanted to enjoy it as well. Yeah.
Yeah, And if you're enjoying it, the students are too. That's just the way it works. And I feel I really feel.
For students and educators these days, because no one is taught how to communicate. Nobody is taught rapport, nobody is thinking about these I don't think. I mean, I did an education degree and I left again thinking wow, nothing here actually taught me any skills that would help to create engaging lessons.
It taught me how to teach to tests.
But yeah, I think I do think that the education system as a whole needs a bit of a shakeup.
I think that's true for many industries, Like you know when people do so my first degree was exercise science. People would come out of that and they would some of them come to me because I owned gyms and want to be a trainer or whatever, and they could prescribe exercise to a level and they did understand that, you know, anatomy and physiology, et cetera, to a level,
But they couldn't have a conversation with somebody. They couldn't build connection, They couldn't they couldn't read the room like they And you know that's not when you think about most degrees, especially as a lawyer, Well fucking hell, you think a huge part of being a good lawyer is understanding people, is being able to build rapport and trust and resolve conflict and solve problems and be present. And yet there's probably no communications subject in your.
Course, right, No, nothing, And this is I think it's a basic fundamental thing that needs to be taught in schools. It needs to be taught in universities. I think communication is everything, and communication requires emotional intelligence, and nowhere are we taught emotional intelligence.
And so people are learning all this when.
They're thirty, forty, fifty, sixty and going oh shit, like That's one of the most common pieces of reflections I get from students in my cohorts. We're usually forty, thirty, fifty whatever, and they're like, why did I not learn this? This would have changed my relationship with my kids, This would have changed my relationship with my boss, This would have changed my relationship to myself. And communication is everything, but it requires emotional intelligence.
What what I mean? We need to tread carefully here, But what a guys? When we go girls and guys, and we're generalizing, but ladies tend to at least display more emotional intelligence, it seems, or be able to open the door wider. Yes, I know I'm generalizing, and I'm a guy, and I tend to be quite touchy feely in an emotional way, not a physical way. That sounded creepy. Can help all the.
Disclaimers for this bit.
Yeah. Do you think that's just a cultural thing that women are more open and more comfortable to talk about all that stuff, or is that biological or something else.
I think it's a little bit of option A and B. I think it's both. But I also think it's very much the context of the cultural context creates a huge change. And you know, if you think back to like my dad's generation, it was it's a generational thing. We don't talk about our feelings. There's been a cultural I would say, like a paradigm shift in some ways. I still believe that women and again careful with these uses of pronouns
things these days, but I do. I would say women generally are encouraged from a young age to talk a lot more about their feelings. However, I've taught lots of teenage boys, lots of teenage boys, and honestly.
They want to talk, they want to get.
Deeper, They actually crave it, and they have blown my mind so often that it's our projections we need to watch. I find when they're given the space and when they're told that it's accepted, it's you.
Know, welcomed. They thrive, they really do.
And you know, again with these it depends on your the context that you bring into that classroom. But if you go in thinking that these boys can't wait to talk about deep stuff, they really do.
Let's talk about you. So, what what's got you excited at the moment, Like what are you researching? What are you studying? What do you think you need to get or what do you want to dive deeper into? Like I'm always researching something I don't know enough about, but I want to know more about what's got your attention at the moment.
At the moment, it's ifs, so internal family systems. I was spending a lot of time researching Carl Jung and shadow work, and I love, love, love love like looking into egos and projections and all of that, and I think that goes hand in hands. From the research that I've done, it tends to go hand in hand with IFS, and I've I've found that very fastating.
Give us, give us a snapshot. So people are like, tell me more, give us a snapshot.
Well, so I'm in the beginning phases of being a student for this but it seems to me that it's acknowledging that within all of us there's multiple parts, like these personas or personalities, and those personalities are all playing a role, and they'll be to protect us from feeling a certain way. And we have we have roles and parts within us that are almost competing for different intentions
and purposes. And oftentimes we think that we are that where the you know, obsessive compulsive person And it's like, well, if you just change the language or the frame that there is a part of me inside that's obsessive compulsive for a particular purpose, we can start to bring wholeness back to ourselves.
Is that that's what I'm sensing in my research.
I'm going to ask you in a minute, TIF so get ready. So what's had my attention the last month? I get on a new thing every month, but I'm doing a deep dive into the relationship between our thoughts and our body. So obviously a thought has a physiological consequence. But the way that we can think ourselves into sickness and so fucking fascinating. Like I could unpack that with you, I won't, But just the consequences of rumination overthinking self loathing,
that whole kind of obsessing about shit. We can't change. Investing energy in the thing that happened five years ago, you know, ruminating about the problems that might happen in the future. It does such damage to our body, like in a literal way, not a metaphoric way, you know, cellular health, cortisole production, nervous system. Oh it's so interesting. So I'm down that rabbit hole. In two weeks, I'll probably take a left turn and be into pottery and ceramics.
But this week, that's fucking now. And once I get on something, I'm like this. I learn something, and then I learn a little bit. Then I open another door, then I open all the doors, and then I want to tell everyone because if I tell everyone, then I remember it better, So I selfishly want to share it.
Yeah that's the phrase, isn't it. Those who can't do teach as in teach so you can do. Yeah, well that's that's me. I'm tiff. What are you into?
Like, what's got your attention in terms of learning?
At the moment, I feel like I've been on it for a while, But it's that it's that idea about beliefs like what do we what do we choose to believe?
And when I choose to believe that, how does my life play out?
Right?
But the answers because we.
You and I both talk to people and learn, we learn science, we learn proven data everyone's and there's science to prove every side of an argument. So then it's understanding the choice of where do I where do I already sit with this? Why do I sit there? Should I shift it? And if I choose to shift it, what does that mean for my life?
Hmm?
Yeah? And also where does where does my identity start and finish in relation to that belief? And yeah, if they're intertwined, then you attack my belief, you attack my identity and fuck you?
Yeah? And why do I make the choices I make? And is there underlying reasons?
You know?
Like I am a reason making factory.
I call myself a justification factory, and I have to catch myself out all the time because justifications can let me be whoever I already am without question. I'll just justify it and go, well, there's this really good reason and I can feel comfortable in that. But is it a mechanism?
Is it?
Are you escaping? Are you deflecting.
What is the thing?
Are they really a dickhead? Or are you the dickhead? I'm usually the dickhead.
Mah well, I think the biggest fairy tale we tell ourselves is that we're open minded. Yeah, well, no you're not. You're not. I'm not. And I teach this shit, you know, I teach it. Am I am? I a clean slate? Fuck? I wish, but I've got preexisting beliefs and ideas and values and bias and prejudice and experiences. I understand objectivity, but I'm not it.
You know.
The best I can hope for is to be more open minded than I currently am. You know, agree? Yeah?
I think the best I feel like you know how you said, how do we teach people to be open minded? I feel like what I would say to everyone is to be like constantly playing Devil's Advocate to yourself. And the more I do that, the more I'm like, wow, I'm not open mind to be steadfast improving yourself wrong?
Yeah, yeah, yep? And I think you know when you are, like when you are that person that you are, you know, you're up the front and your torch it talking and teaching. But you're also like, by the way, here's a list of the things I've fucked up, and get comfortable. You know. It's like, oh, okay, so you're kind of like me, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know I've said a thousand times on this show. If I waited until I had all my shit together before I did a podcast or a presentation or a coaching,
I'd never do it. I'd be sitting at home in the fetal position, watching like a Netflix because I fucked I will get five things wrong this podcast, and that's okay. You know. So a couple of questions for you. You're great, by the way, we appreciate you. What do you need to get better at? What do you need to get better at.
The first thing that actually came up was running, because I'm trying to do that at the moment. It's discipline with running, it's actually discipline I'm really practicing.
I've got this like.
Rebellion against structure at the moment. I think because I spent so long being so disciplined, so structured, and you know, be here at this time and this time and that time, that I've created this false dichotomy that freedom is the opposite of structure. So I'm pulling back in on my discipline again.
That's good. That's good that you're questioning that. If what's one thing you need to get better.
At all of the things. No, I don't think so I think structure, But I also don't do well with structure. But I still feel like there's a lot of gaps I leave in my own progress in a lot of areas in life because I thrive on spontaneity and going with the flow and being you know, intuitive, yeah, intuitive, thank you. Yeah.
So I think that's a battle.
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, and new harps. I've got to get better at doing the things that I don't want to do but I need to do. Like if I've got to read, like your PhD, I've got to like my PhD. Like if I've got to read an academic paper, I'll find eighty fucking reasons not to read that paper, and I will convince myself that all eighty of those things must be done first, even if that's watching motorbike
reviews on YouTube, Like I can rationalize fucking anything, you know. So, if everything goes great for you for the next five years personally professionally, everything goes great, happening in five years.
I would love to be a mother.
That's been an ongoing, bloody, spiritual, physical, emotional journey. So in the next five years, I'll be a mum and my school will have its own HQ. I'd really love to buy a commercial property and have a space for schools and coaches and teachers and students to come to. Also while I have my little toddlers on my hip. Hopefully that's right, you just have.
Your offspring just strapped to your body, like yeah, fucking yeah. What before we go, what makes you coach? Coaches? What makes a good coach? I know that's that's not a one minute answer, but give us a snapshot. What makes somebody a good coach? What's maybe in the top three things that we would want?
Emotional intelligence, communication skills, and a growth mindset, I would say, are like a real growth mindset because you're in the it is the industry of growth.
It's it's you know, it's an it's an interesting industry because you know, I tell you what. Now, obviously I had no opinion of this is full disclosure. I had no opinion about you because I didn't really know much, right, So, but you and I and Tiff. We all inhabit a landscape which is very, very busy, hectic and full of chest beating people who they have the one true philosophy ideology program, pill powder, potion, fucking path. I tell you
what I loved about you. I jumped on your instant and I even rang Tiff, didn't I Tiff?
He did true story and.
I said, I said, teeth, I went, what's going on with this? Bitches? Teeth fuck? And hell no, I didn't do that at all. I did not do that at all. Don't send me an email. Everyone, Brianna's okay with it? I think no, I went, I went, Brown has done this really well, like look at a website, look at it, you know, not that and both of us could learn from you. And I was thinking, Wow, the way that you put all that together. And what I also loved, which was genuine. It was pr and it was marketing,
but it was also genuine, which makes it valid. Your students just pumping up your tires one after another after another after another, And I thought, you know what, you can't make people do that. That's real, you know, And so whatever you're doing, you're doing something great. So congratulations, and you know you seem to have raving fans, which is, you know, in the space that you operate, that's a good thing, not a bad thing.
So yeah, so well done, you thank you so much. That really means the world. I find it hard, honestly. Sometimes I have my own process with that space that we're in and that growth space, and I always, again playing Devil's advocate for myself. I want to make sure that we're doing good things and that I'm not full. You know, it's a very interesting space, this personal development and coaching space, and there's a lot of shady shit.
There's a lot of shady shit and Charlatan's and you do this and it's like a really it can be a gross industry. And I sort of say to my clients my goal is to be redundant. I don't want to be I don't want to be the missing piece. I don't want to be I'm just a teacher and I'm learning and I'm fucking up and yeah, so that's kind of my message.
But it is a very interesting industry.
Yeah, since we all three of us have a similar philosophy, all right, now, plug away tell people where to go, how to get involved, where they can find you, follow you, connect with you if you'd be so kind.
Probably Instagram, I think is the place. So I am Breanna May on Instagram. And the mind School Method is the place, the place where I get to teach all this fun stuff. And yeah, the website, I sort of use it, I kind of don't. It's really Instagram. And the mind School Method is currently open. We're going to Queensland next and that's very exciting. First time we're going over east, and then another one in Perth in October.
So all things mindset, emotional intelligence, shadow work, all the tools so that you can then learn what tools to use and when to fuck them right off.
Oh I love that a woman after on my own vocabulary will say goodbye. Fairbue Browner TIV, thank you so much. Enjoyed meeting you and continued success, my friend.
Thank you so much,