04 | Disruptive Clients: How To Have Tricky Conversations With Challenging Bootcampers

Uh, if I'm feeling tired down stewing about something, uh, it's going to affect the way that I can learn, that I can shop for my clients, a shot for my family. So learning how to manage this stuff, I think is one of the most important things I. To being successful and sticking with this for a long time and how you feel and feelings is actually what we're gonna talk about today. I hesitated sharing this because, uh, it's not like my best moment as a trainer.

Uh, it was saying that was really challenging at the time, but I thought if I can, I will share this as an episode. Not because I think it'll apply to all of you, but because there might be one or two of you out there who are going through something similar, and this might really help. Anyway, let's get on with the show. So let's, let's go back, let's go back in time to, uh, young Kyle, training people in the park.

Um, at the, the time I was running two classes per day, one in the morning, one in the evening, and actually I think. At this point I might have been doing four classes. So like two in the morning, two in the evening, regardless. Uh, one of our evening class times. Uh, yeah, it was when I was doing two. 'cause it was an early, I feel like I'm that cliche thing in the movie where it's the old guy and he's like, it was 1972. Oh 19, no, 1971. It was, it's like, just get on with the story.

So, uh, I was training people in the park and a. Uh, I had set up two classes in the evening, so we were trying to now fill two different time slots. Uh, but my feeling was it's like a, I was running hour classes before I switched to 45 minutes, so it was only about another half an hour I was having to spend at the park 'cause all the equipment was set up and if I could even just get like a few more clients, that was gonna make a big difference at the end of the month.

So we're trying to fill two different classes. We had this earlier time slot and we had this, this, a group of people from a local business that was like walking distance from the park. Who wanted to all sign up and do that, that five, sort of the one that started between five and six, uh, 'cause they could just come straight from work. So, and it was five people, five people wanted to join this class that we just started. So that was amazing. So I was like, yes, please sign up.

Um, and I had eight in the class total. So I had three, couple people, I think one person had moved, uh, to an earlier time. We had a couple of new people. It was a fairly new group of clients. And we got started, and I remember the first session, there was this one person who came from this local business who just complained the whole way throughout. And not just, not just like, you know, clients complain and we just. We get like a sadistic, like thrill from it, we smile. It wasn't like that.

It was just like outright like, I'm not gonna do that. What are you doing? And I was just like, what? Like what is this person's problem? And I, I was kinda like, okay, that was a bit weird. But you know, like, maybe she'll get into it. She knows other people in the class, so maybe once she gets into it, she'll be all right. Uh, but that wasn't the case, the second session, oh, I'm not doing that. That's stupid. Why are we doing this? Uh, what, you know, what is, what's the point of this?

Like, oh, I hate this, I hate this, I hate this. This is dumb. And I could just feel like the energy of the group just over the 45 minutes would just go down, down, down, down, like everyone was. I was feeling it. I was struggling to, to stay smiling and keep the energy up, and keep the vibe up. And, and it was also a bit like, I think, I hope, like she obviously hates this. Why does she keep coming? But she kept coming for the full, uh, six weeks. So she came 12 sessions.

I don't think from memory, I don't think from memory she missed a session. Um, and yeah, I dreaded those sessions. The session afterwards great. There was like great people, so it was kind of good. I had that second one, but maybe it wasn't good in a way because then by the time I would leave the park. The feeling wasn't as strong and I was kind of like, okay. Uh, but yeah, I do remember like coming in, in the evenings, running that first session was really hard work.

Uh, and just watching how it affected everyone else in the group as well. And it was, it was, um, you know, it was kind of her. And then she would kind of set off one of her other coworkers who would kind of like get in as well. So then you've got these like two people who are kind of. Really bringing the mood down. Uh, so I decided, um, I just, I didn't end up doing anything about it. I, there's a part of me that really wanted to pull her aside or give her a call or send her a message.

But yeah, I was in my early twenties here. Having conversations with people like that might lead to conflict or that, that were like hard conversations was definitely not in my wheelhouse. I'd never. Being prepared for anything like that in my life. Uh, so, so yeah, I just didn't end up doing it and I was like, just, we'll just get to the end. We'll just tough it out. And we finished the six weeks, put out enrollment for the next six weeks.

Not one single person from that eight signed up to the bootcamp again, every other time slot signed up, boosted. Fantastic. But that one time slot just killed the time slot. Like obviously everyone else in the class had been having a miserable time. I had been so caught up in how she was making me feel and how hard it was for me that I probably didn't really think too much about what impact that was having for other clients and what they were going through.

So luckily, um, it was a. It must have been spring or autumn. We were doing plenty of marketing in the background, getting out in the community, things like that. Uh, 'cause we were trying to grow these new time slots and amazingly eight new people signed up for the next. So overall didn't cause an issue. But what if, what if I had addressed that? And even if this one client had left, or if I'd even fired her, which I'll talk about now in hindsight, how I would've tried to manage her.

What if that had happened and, you know, everyone else had signed up. I would've had like 15 people in a class. That's, that's like thousands of dollars there. Um, potentially there was a couple of clients in that class who left, who did come back later. That's the power of newsletters. I hope to talk about that more on the podcast, like newsletters and keeping in touch with clients, um, to bring people back and keep that relationship going.

So I did end up getting a couple of those clients back. But yeah, that was a real blow and it was a real eye-opener 'cause it was, 'cause I kind of thought I'll just bury my head in the sand on this, not do anything. And the problem will kind of go away. And I guess it did, but it was quite damaging to the bootcamp in the process. Luckily she wasn't coming to my 6:00 AM class, which had like 20 people in it because that would've really, uh, really hurt. So yeah, that's. So, yeah.

So let's talk about, you know, how do you manage clients like this? Like you might have a client with something a little bit different, and I'm gonna talk about another client, um, who I did address the problem with. Um, and, and we had a kind of good result, um, and how I managed that. Uh, but with this client, like in hindsight and obviously now older, having gone through more experiences in life and feeling more comfortable, I. To maybe have that hard conversation.

I would've addressed it with her. I would've asked her. It was difficult because I had another class straight after, so I couldn't just say, Hey, can you, can we have a chat after class? Or something like that. Um, and I think Kyle, at the time, you know, if I called her on the phone or something like that, I would've been like, what's your problem? What? Like, you're bringing everyone down. Um, but now knowing what I know, I think what I would've said is, Hey, can we catch up?

Can I give you, can I give you a call? Or maybe one of the nights that we didn't have bootcamp, and just be like, Hey, what, like what are you wanting to get out of bootcamp? Like, you seem like you're not enjoying the classes. Is there anything I can do to make the classes better? And when we come at people like that with curiosity, it stops them from being. It diffuses some of their defensiveness.

So I just came to her and said, Hey, look, which was also valid, your behavior's not okay in these classes or even, Hey, like, I'm sorry, but I'm gonna have to ask you to stop coming to classes. Then of course she's just gonna be defensive straight away. But I. If I had come to her and said, Hey, like, what do you like? She signed up for a reason. She kept coming to the classes for a reason, even though she seemed to be miserable, which is dragging everyone down.

She, she seemed there was some reason that she would come. Maybe it was just peer pressure from the rest of the people in the group. I don't know. Uh, but yeah, just like, Hey, what's, um, what's going on? Like, what, what's. Why, why are you here? And by finding that out, like maybe she's like, oh, I'm doing it 'cause everyone else is doing it. And it's like, oh, well is there, is there any reason that you in particular thought this might be good?

Um, you know, have you done exercise classes before that you did, like getting some feedback? 'cause there's no reason I can't add some stuff in that she likes. 'cause sometimes with people like this. It's the classic like, hurt people, hurt people. Like sometimes with people like this, they just want to be seen. They just want to have someone acknowledge them.

And maybe even having that phone call would've been enough and I wouldn't have had to change anything with the classes, but simply asking her, letting her know, Hey, I see you, um, that, you know, would've improved or built a bit of rapport that I could have stirred her up, you know, used a bit of, a bit of Australian humor. When, um, she started acting out or saying stuff like, go along with it. She's like, oh, this is the worst. Oh, this is the worst.

You know, just like making it fun and, and then bringing the mood up for everyone else. Making it okay for everyone else to kind of be a bit silly about it and have a laugh. Um, so yeah, that's one way and that's now, that's probably the first thing I'd try is like, and I'm not saying that's easy. I could probably have to psych myself up to have that conversation.

Um, but yeah, I'd have that conversation if she wasn't willing to talk to me outside of class, then we might be thinking, okay, like, here's your money for the remaining classes. Like, I'm gonna ask you to, to stop coming. And obviously that's easier said than done two, but hey, I lost seven clients because of this one client. There might have been other reasons, but I'm assuming I lost seven clients because of this one client. So you are running a business.

Uh, if you've got someone coming at and damaging a business, you. Within your rights to ask them to stop coming. Um, the other thing I could have done is spoke to the rest of the group without her there. So I could have said, Hey, with the rest of the group, like, how, how are everyone, everyone feeling about, about this client? Like, do you, like I know, um, she seems to really struggle. You know, let's, let's talk about it nicely. We don't feel like.

Hey, she hates the classes and she's dragging everyone's mood down. I get it. Maybe that's your personality where you'd be able to do that. I wouldn't be able to do that. I'd be like, I'd have to, you know, wrap it up in a pretty bow and say, Hey, you know, it seems like she struggles with the classes. Is everyone else okay? Like, is it bothering? And then if someone spoke up at that, if they're all like, yeah, yeah, it's fine. At least I've addressed it and they know I'm aware.

Um, and maybe even saying, Hey, I've spoken to her. Um. Or I'm gonna speak to her one-on-one. And it's not about starting like a gossip session about this person, it's just about just letting again, the rest of the clients know, Hey, I see what's happening. I see that it's a bit of a mood killer. Um, and I just want to check in with all of you guys that you're going, all right. Yeah. So that's the other way I would've dealt with it. And that way did work with another client.

I had, uh, I had a client, big guy. Um. He ran his own business and would often he ran, he would come to our 6:00 AM classes, but he would often work, have been working all night and come to our 6:00 AM classes without any sleep. And I, you know, and at the time I was like, I suspected it, but now looking back it's like, yeah, definitely. Like there was things. And I'm not sure about the legality around this.

So, um, there was, he seemed like maybe he was taking more than caffeine to stay awake if, if I put it nicely and I don't wanna share too much 'cause I don't wanna be like, if there's like an ex client or something to this or something like that. But anyway, so, but he would come then to the sessions, like very, uh, high strung. And during this time he even had like outside of class, had the heart. Episode. Uh, so I was very conscious of that. He was coming to class.

He was, there was a couple of nights a week, he wasn't sleeping. Um, and he was very like, you know, whatever was, he was taking to stay awake and then like, just cortisol and stuff like that. 'cause his body was going through a lot. And if we were doing boxing or something like that, like. Uh, with boxing, you know, we mix it up, we'd get different partners and I'm always like, you've gotta adjust your punches to the pad holder.

Like, if you are with a, a, someone who's not very strong, you've got to do like, focus maybe more on speed and softer punches. Um, not following through as much, but he would be so agitated that he would just, and the good thing is he was very personable. He got along with everyone in the class, so he already had a lot of. Goodwill and rapport in the class.

But I know particularly with boxing, um, I had quite a few clients come up to me and say, Hey, I can't be with him when box, 'cause like my arms are gonna get, get knocked off. 'cause he's just going way too hard. Like, especially doing like hooks and things like that. Um, and I would, and then I was aware and then I'd watched these clients sort of like cowering behind their pads. And so I started off by speaking to him. I said, Hey look, can you, you know, make sure you ease back.

But I guess just the mind space he was in when he was coming to class like that, um, he, he wasn't able to do that. Uh, so I was, I started pairing him up with some of the other stronger guys in the class. And then, and I spoke to them and I said, Hey look, I'm gonna have you pair up with this client and you just let me know, like if it's an issue. Um, and then I think, you know, they ended up enjoying it 'cause it was, they felt like they could really. You know, go hard as well with him.

Um, and yeah, so, so, but I had that conversation with the client and with some of the other clients who were impacted and we were able to work out a solution. And it was one that, as a, again, as a trainer, like I debated, should I be sending this client home? Um, because, uh, you know, obviously like we need to. Way up risk. Like is this client a risk to his own health and to those around him? Um, ultimately mainly because of the rapport he'd built in the class with the other clients.

Uh, I think if he was being overly aggressive with other clients, I would've said, no, you know, you gotta go home. But I kept checking in with him. We would, we would talk regularly and it was a particularly challenging time in his life and I. I met his, his wife at one of the other things and spoke to her, and ultimately it was myself and I had an assistant trainer and we were just aware and we just, we just monitored him and, and managed him in the class.

Uh, and we decided that it was a good thing for him to be there. And sometimes he didn't make it. Sometimes I think he knew it was no good and he wouldn't make it. But, um, we would kind of see how he was doing in the morning and then try and like. You know, manage that with the other clients. Uh, and like I said, never, never aggressive, never, um, anything like that, but just obviously in a head space where he didn't understand his own limitations and was pushing himself really hard.

So that's another client. Um, and hopefully with the internet, like never comes out. But yeah, this is something that. That I wanted to share with you, like both of these stories are difficult 'cause they were difficult situations to manage. Uh, and I handled each one differently. And I really just wanted to share this as an idea for you of, of what maybe you could do. And also to encourage you as the show is about warming up.

Like maybe this will warm you up and get you in the head space to be able to manage a client who, or talk to a client or talk to your class about a client. Who's being disruptive. And before I go, I want to talk about one more type of client so that you, that can be disruptive to your class. And this is the long term client. This is a client who may have been training with you since you've started. Uh, and this is the client who refers to your classes as their classes.

My class, I go to my class. This is my class. You know, the times that they go to are their class and they start taking possession. Of, of what you do. They're also the type of client who when you change something up, they're like, oh, I didn't like that. They'll quickly tell you, which is nice, you know, they're giving you feedback, but what can happen? Um, and usually it's not just one long-term client, it's usually like two or three or even more.

They start to dictate what your business should be. So they've decided what you offer is what they love. They want it to stay the same. They don't want change. And they're going to tell you about it. If you do try and change things, uh, they're gonna tell you they don't like it. They're gonna tell you they can't come to the class. Um, I had one trainer who was losing money on a class because, because of these clients who were like, we want to be indoors.

So they were spending money for an indoor space that was costing more than what they were making from the class. Because the other thing that often happens is these groups of clients have been around for a long time, is. Often without meaning to, they can become a bit cliquey. They can become a bit of a clique. So someone else joins the class and you know, feels like they're doing their class. They feel like, oh, I'm in, I'm in these other clients' class. I'm just like the outsider.

So that's another type of client you need to be wary of because they're positive, they're great supporters of you. But if you notice that you are starting to make decisions. On your business, your classes that are based on a small group of clients rather than the vision of what you actually want to create from your business. That's a bit of a warning sign. That's a bit of a sign that, oh, maybe I need to have a bit of a chat to these clients.

Um, or which might just be like, Hey, I'm gonna be trying some new stuff. Um, we're gonna do it for a month, and then at the end of the month, you let me know what you think. I want you to hold off. Hold off any feedback or like reservations that you have and let's try it for a month or three months or something like that. So that's my recommendation with those types of clients. 'cause they also can be business, business killers. They'll take over a class, dictate what everyone's doing.

And the only way I've seen trainers get out of this, and I've seen multiple trainers get stuck in this, including some trainers really close to me, is you just have to make the changes. You cannot, there's no way to keep those clients in happy in the way that they think they're gonna be happy and grow the class. You're gonna have to change, they're gonna have to get outta their comfort zone along with you and change. So that's it for today's, uh, episode. I hope this is helpful.

Like I said, it might not be for everyone. You might be like, oh, I've never experienced this before. I've got amazing clients. But if you're one of the two few people out there who's like, oh, I've experienced something similar. I hope this is really helpful and um, I will see you on the next episode of the warmup. Have a great week.