Oh, it's another Thursday afternoon. And you know what that means. It's time to record a podcast. It's the BGB's podcast. I thought it was 40. The 46th. numbered podcast, which is incredible. Nikki, we've been doing this for 46 years straight. Can you believe it? It's incredible. It's incredible. Do you, uh, I'll introduce myself. Yeah. Hi, I'm John Warren. I'm one of your hosts. Nikki Grayson, my forever co-host. You seem...
You seem not great. No, I'm normal. Do you want to talk? Yeah, I'm normal. Do you want to talk about a bet that we made a couple weeks ago? And by a couple weeks ago, I mean in October. Yeah, what? Let me open my calendar again so I can get the exact... You know what? While you're looking that up, I'm going to introduce our guest.
You can find her. She's an editor over at GameSpot. I practiced in the fucking mirror not to say GameStop. Holy shit. You did it right, Sam. Jessica Cogswell. Hi, Jess. Hi, how is everybody? We're really good. Oh, we're so happy to have you here. We're so super psyched. Hey, Nikki, what bet did we make in October? On VGB's podcast, episode 21. 21. Okay, I'm listening. Okay. I really wish we specified what the bet was for.
Because we didn't. Because I'm about to win is why. Okay, sure. On how many games Kawhi Leonard was going to play in the 2024-2025 NBA season. This is so not interesting. We bet on that? Yes, we did. Okay. All right. Okay. And what did I say? Something like I said something like 10 games and he played more than that? You said 16 games. Okay, I was wrong. He played more than that. I said 33 games.
Okay. Did he actually play 33? How many games do you think that Kawhi Leonard played this year? For reference, there are 82 games in a basketball season. I am going to go 29. It's a great guess, but you also would be wrong because I was right. He played 37 games. Okay, so you were Price is Right Rules, which is how we run our podcasts. Yeah. That's a win for me. Wow, congratulations. Jess, you should be really honored that you were here for this revelation, which is like...
One of the most boring things I think we've ever bet on. Sorry. It's one of the best interests to a podcast that's ever happened. One person has no idea what we're talking about. The other person didn't remember the conversation. And then the other person didn't even really on a tech, like is only winning on a technicality.
so it's kind of good for everybody it's like a you had to be there joke but only only one person was there and i wasn't even really there because if i didn't have a calendar reminder yeah Nikki, I'm noticing also something that Jess and I kind of have this really considered framing of our... uh kind of our camera and like you can see us what kind of you can see i just want i just want everyone who is not listening or not watching to know that nikki is only filling roughly
10% of the frame. My Chiron reaches higher than my head. It's true. It's true. What does that mean? What does that say about you? It means I'm good. Okay. Well, we've talked about a lot of bullshit already, so let's skip that part. Jess, I'm really excited to have you here. And I'm doing a new thing where I'm asking the host to bring something to the table. And you've, I think, brought something very interesting. But I want you to first tell us.
And do you also have something to share in this vein? I kind of do, but it's like a little bit fucked up. So it kind of depends on what like your threshold is for fucked up situations that. happened to me this morning okay okay my choice was i want to hear from from each of you a really good piece of like local or neighborhood or like friend drama but it has to be someone like
It has to be so far removed that they're never going to listen to this. They're never going to know. It's someone, it could even be family drama, but I just want like a good sip of tea. You know what I mean? And I like doing that. It makes you realize this is something that like when I started working in games media, I realized that.
have to find people who you can like have these conversations with and then also you need to tell them about your stupid drama too at work and like and like twitter drama and all that stuff too right because you realize when you're talking about how stupid and small it all is and like it makes you feel
I don't know. It just makes the world a happier place. Like if you go to a friend and I'm talking to one of my friends and I'm like, hey, so there's this guy named Grums on the internet and this is his deal. And you realize, you're like, no, I let this guy like.
have some control over my emotions and make me feel a bit bad but when you do it like when you phrase it like that you realize like it really doesn't matter everything's kind of weird and strange so i would love to hear um some local some local news from you guys Some local drama. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Your caveat was really interesting because I was actually going to tell you something that our next door neighbors did, but now I'm afraid that they might actually...
They've asked before. I mean, here's the thing. And I said, I said, I'll text you. And I never did. But if they ask again, it's going to be really obvious that I don't want them to listen to. That's so brave. We have a backyard.
Okay. Yeah. Okay. And it's, and it's a great backyard. It's a sanctuary and we're private people. It's not like we go out there and we like hang a hog all night. Like it's not what we do, but we just, we just want to know that we're not being observed in our backyard when we're out there. But our neighbors have put a camera in their second story window that looks out. into their yard, but almost certainly also in town.
And when we asked about it, because it took us like five days to get up the nerve to ask about it. When we asked about it, one of them blamed the spouse on it being placed that way. And then when we got confirmation that you could still see part of our house from that camera angle and said, yeah, we just like, maybe just angle it down and like onto the thing. They were like. My spouse insists that it's exactly the way it is because he's the security for you.
So, yeah, it's just kind of weird, you know? It's like we've had dinner with these people like five times. And so it's just kind of, you know what? Yeah. Anyway, on the back of his truck, it has, and I also never saw the back of his truck because he backs in every day, but I saw it recently. What's on the back of his truck? Tell me two things that are on the back of his truck.
spying yeah yeah no it's just a bumper sticker that says i love the start of every good story please continue and and then the other ones got like It's Calvin pissing on the Toyota logo. Okay. Jess, do you have guesses? So it was cutting out a little bit, but I'm going to guess Don't Tread on Me. Was that already a guess? Great guess. Okay. Nope. That's a new one. Okay. All right. So Don't Tread on Me, and I'm going to go with...
a marathon sticker, you know, like however many, yeah. You are, you are like, you are actually unbelievably close with both. Okay. So it's a thin red line. Yeah. Okay. Red line. Red line. Firefighters. No, that's military. Ah. Okay. And then like a triathlon thing. So you're totally right. Okay, wow. So I really actually weren't close. You were like, you were really, really close. Yeah, you were really, really close.
So congrats. That's incredible. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. I also like, listen, if you're listening, you two, I like you. We've had dinner. I like you. I think this is a weird move. I just think it's an odd move. Yeah, no, for sure. I just don't think, like, I think it's a strange move, guys. It is a strange move. I got to back John up here. It's a weird move, you guys. It's a weird move. Just move it. Just angle it. Do something different.
start hanging hog only in that part of the lawn that is visiting. Okay. Or is the whole thing visible? Then what happens then, Nikki, if once I start doing that, I just notice that the camera is now pointing even further into our yard. It's kind of like, we liked what we saw. The odds that that is happening are so much lower than them being like, oh, yeah. My solution. So is it like...
Is it like a security camera? Like, does it alert them when there's movement and stuff? You said it's security. It looks like that. then what you just have to do is you have to like set it like off constantly. Just constantly go through that area at whatever time so that they're always fucking paranoid about it. And they're looking like, oh, what's going on? And then eventually they'll move it because they'll be like, well, they're always out there. It's annoying.
I could staple a bunch of flags and stuff onto a scarecrow and put it out there. Yeah, get a scarecrow. If it's always kind of moving. It'll just be like, get one of those human detected, human detected, human detected, you know, just over and over and over again. Exactly. Yeah. There's a, there's a restaurant on the corner here. that the house that is adjacent to the restaurant has ring cameras that point into the parking lot of the restaurant. And I'm like,
So it's not even like, like, I don't know what information they're trying to glean from by pointing like the fucking camera into the thing. It sucks. But it informs you as you're walking by. It says, hi. You are being recorded. as you walk through the parking lot every time. And I flip it off every time. So I think that's what you should probably start doing. Like at 3 a.m., you should probably walk out there because they'll get a notification about it. Just do this thing.
Just two big birds. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I might get shot if I did that. Nah, for sure. Absolutely. You run that risk everywhere, you know? Yeah, that's true. I do live in Texas. It's true. I run that risk. So that's one. I'm trying to think if there's anything like... more kind of fun or like scandalous. I can't immediately think of anything more scandalous than that. The day we moved in here, someone died three doors down.
And we don't know who or how. That's a good omen. Yeah, good omen the day we moved in. And there was some sort of foul play involved because detectives came back later. That's a really good omen. Yeah. Because here's why. You're not going to have multiple crimes on the same block. It's like lightning. That's true. Yeah. So you got the one out of the way for this generation.
And it wasn't you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I think that's good. That could be it. Nikki, do you have a good one? Do you have any sort of local neighborhood goss? There's a quite... It's not like a... Quiet is not, I think, the word I want to use. There is an unconfirmed theory that there is a person who is running. like these queer gatherings, queer parties in LA is like, is skimming money off the top in a way that is like truly insane. Delicious.
Because the tickets to these events cost an insane amount of money. And like, yeah, Los Angeles is like the third or second or third, whatever, most expensive city in the country, whatever. It's expensive to rent a space. But these spaces can't be that expensive. And then they constantly are like... But we don't have any money. And it's like you fuckers are charging $35 to hang out in a place for four hours. And there are 250 people here. Like the numbers just don't.
They don't add up. Yeah. But I don't know anybody intently enough to have heard anything other than, I think they might be taking money. And I said. That's probably true because the numbers don't make any sense. Yeah. And like, I don't know, is throwing parties a job? Yeah, sure. But also, like, you shouldn't then also have volunteer workers. Right. That seems pretty important. Right, right, right. Okay, okay. That's a good one.
That's a pretty good one. That's a pretty good one. Jess, I'm going to give you the floor. You said it might be a little upsetting, and I'm going to say we're going to risk it. I can't wait. We're going to risk it. I'm going to say let's do it. Okay. Okay. It's a weird one. So my house that I have, it's so weird because I don't want to say my house, even though it is like, but I don't own it. I'm renting a house. In this economy, no way. So my house, though, acts up.
Yeah, it backs up to some woods, right? And like, there's lots of deer that come and like to play and have fun, hang out. They're super adorable. I go out there and feed them. It's great. Today. There were a shit ton of possums. I don't know why a lot of possums. They're really cute. I went out there. I did my usual thing of like admiring the cute animals. I like took some videos of the possums playing. There was like a mom and her baby. It was real cute shit.
little while passes the possums are still just like on and off like walking walking around right and i like how i'm like giving some neighborhood drama i'm giving you possum drama Because it was like fucking Game of Thrones today. Awesome drama. Awesome drama. Also, just cut out again. But, like, there was some sort of turf war happening. And long story short, I saw another possum kill another possum this morning. It was deeply upsetting. I thought they were play fighting at first.
And then I realized it was not a play fight. They kept going at it. I got freaked out and I tried to scare them to break up the fight. That didn't work. um I tried to I brought out so like I'm like fucking like people joke when they come over. They're just like, you got like this whole fucking Snow White thing going on because like I'm out there with strawberries like.
feeding the deer and so i have a strawberry and i'm trying to break up two possums that are fighting i throw a strawberry at the possums it doesn't stop them The other one straight up murders the other possum. The whole time I was originally letting my three-year-old son watch these animals play. And I had to be like, we have to stop. We need to go inside. So he didn't see. I saw the possum. He laid there for like probably 20 minutes. I thought that possum was dead. Then he got up.
He went away. So I don't know. I mean, I guess he was playing possum, right? That's where it comes from. Right, right, right. Yeah. He definitely was Mike Tyson, though, missing an ear, like whole side. Oh, wow, man. Like very gross looking. I'm just going to leave it at that. We're not going to go into it. And he went away. I assume he is not among us now, but I do not know where he is. And that was my morning. And then I had my psychiatrist. but I do have a question about virtually at nine.
Did you have anything to talk about this week? Did this come up? Did this come up? You know, if it were therapy, yes. But it was just my psychiatrist, so it was just medicine questions. So she was just like, how are your stress levels? And I'm like, normal. Normal. Nothing happening here. It's fine. I have a question. The body of the dead one, though. Now that's still right outside your house.
No, that's the one that he mysteriously got up. I don't know. He was down for a long time when he got up. really horrifying looking and was just doing circles and i was like i don't want to watch this and so i like yeah and then it was gone so I don't know if he got up and moved up to zone volition or something else. You don't have to call anybody about it then. Yeah, you don't have to call anyone. Just leave it. Yeah. Originally we were going to call animal control because like.
I have a three year old. The weather is 78 degrees today. I'm like, we're going to go outside and play. And I don't want there to just be a dead possum. But yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I hope he's okay. I don't have a lot of confidence, but that was my drama this morning. Like I said, I literally have, it's funny is I deleted all of the videos because now they make me depressed.
But I was, like, recording the posses being cute. That's so fair. Right? Yeah, no. No, that's not anymore. I don't want to have it on here. Yeah, no, you know when he's sort of like Lord of the Flies bullshit out on your, yeah, no, I'd delete that stuff too. Yeah, no, it's tough. Like animals are so tough. I don't know. Ann and I, we have all this nature happening in our backyard. We're very used to that. It's kind of the same deal. And we are very much like...
Nature's really cruel and uncaring, and you just have to let things. live or whatever but it's like every time we see something upsetting happening we're like no no we have to interfere no no we're not scientists it's fine we just have to you know we just have to do something you know My husband saw me like trying to break up this possum fight. And he was like, Jessica, stop. It's nature. Don't go. I was like, but this is so sad.
That's their way. Just let them go. And then I go in and I'm just having my existential crisis tour. I'm like, damn. sure it's fucked up yeah no they'll they'll do whatever it's wild out there they'll they'll they will just do whatever um so yeah in that vein we had so there's a eastern phoebe
in our little doorway. From a friend? It's a kind of bird. And she nested above... the our door and it's and this kind of shelter and then she had a nest and she laid three eggs and the three babies were born and they were like out there like stretching like they're like really cute um and and got really really attached to like making sure that they were okay and like just kind of kept like going out there and make sure they were okay and like she'd report back to me
that for whatever reason spooked them one day and they all kind of flew out and we're like where did they go well apparently all they did was they landed on my car which is parked outside and they shit all over it i went out one morning And I had the most shit I've ever had on my car, just on my car. I've never had.
shit on my car like that and so this whole family of birds decided like this fucking lady let's this fucking broad let's shit on her car and it's like no it's my car her car is in the fucking garage and so it's just covered in shit Anyway, the babies are fine. They all flew away. It was good. I thought the end of this story was that you found one on the ground, which has happened to me multiple times. That's a bummer. The saddest thing ever.
Can we stop talking about dead animals? Yeah, sorry. No, no, no. It's good. It's fine. It's fine. What I want to do, you've been kind of on a tour. of podcasts lately, Jess. I can't believe you're doing this to me. This has been a subject on several shows, but I just... I played one game of MTG Arena last week, and it made me angry. Because this is so small. But it was like, okay, time to play LAN.
before you can play guy and i'm like what do you mean play land before i can play guy i don't understand any of this so what i want you to do is to pitch us on Magic the Gathering. No, not us. Us is too generous. No, no, no. No, Nikki. No, Nikki. Listen. No, no. I'm living clean. You're living clean? That's fine. You can't get me with this.
Not in a million years. John though seems susceptible. That's exactly correct. John though, susceptible to peer pressure. I am. I am. You can get him. You can get me. Literally, I have confirmation now that I'm going to Summer Game Fest. And I already had two different people be like, so we're going to bring our magic decks, right? So, John.
i'll bring one for you all right okay okay okay great yeah um so the way that i like to play magic the gathering is there's different ways there's different formats right and i like commander and commander is you have 100 cards none of them can be duplicates of one another
And you have one guy who you don't put in your deck. He's still part of the 100, but he's your commander. And he is like leading the charge of this. And everything that that commander does is basically something that like helps. supplements like the the thing that you have going on right like whatever gimmick or mechanic you're trying to do to win um and so like that's that's the way that i like to play and it's just it's a fun little strategy game honestly um
And it scratches that itch. And I don't know. I'm trying to think of how the art's really pretty. You know, that kind of was a selling point for me. I just like to look at them. I like to have. a hobby that while adjacent to video games is not just looking at a screen it's kind of nice to sit around with friends and like you know feel like My grandma playing rummy or whatever. But for me, it's, you know, putting down my little mermaids.
Yeah, I play a lot of mermaids and vampires. If you like cool little creatures, cool little guys, I feel like it's a great game for little guys. Okay, great game for little guys. I'm writing all this down. Great game for little guys. It's cutting out for me. Yeah, I've written this. Commander, 100 cards. Commander does everything. Art is pretty. Quote, I like to look at him. Jess Cogswell. Great game for little guys.
Okay. Yeah, absolutely. I sign off on all of those. Okay. The Final Fantasy cards are coming out. Are you excited about those? Yeah. I'm so excited. But you can't just get those, right? Like, how do you, you can't just, like, go to, you can't just, like, go to. No, no, Nikki, Nikki, you explain, no, no, you explain to us how you think you get the Final Fantasy cards for Magic Together. They're not selling you singles, right? You're buying a, you're buying a pack.
Right. And only one of them is going to be cloud. And then the other one's going to be the other like eight in there are going to be horses. Right. So there's a few different ways. I do like the idea of running a deck that's just Cloud and a bunch of horses. Yeah. I feel like if he had had the chance, he maybe would have gone through a horse thing. So I get it. No, absolutely he would. Yeah.
Um, there's, there's a few different ways that you can, you can buy it. So you can get the commander box, which is going to be an a hundred card commander deck, including whoever the person like cloud is, for instance, is a commander deck.
So you're going to get cloud and then you're going to get 99 other cards that all like work with cloud and will all be a lot of fun. It'll be, I mean, there's going to be some stuff that's probably not final fantasy related, but it's going to be like 85% final fantasy card. that are all in there that will work alongside cloud and will
you know, do whatever you're trying to do. And they also have one for like Ishtola from Final Fantasy XIV. And I think Terra from VI and Titus from X. Those are the ones that they've confirmed. And then you can also get, if you don't want to do commander, you can just get booster packs, which booster packs are just like how they are with Pokemon or whatever. You buy a pack, it's 15 cards.
you can buy a box of booster packs. So it's going to be 30 of those 15 card packs. But like, that's pretty much how you do it. And then once it's been out for a little while you'll start to be able to buy singles and stuff like that like you can go to a game store and you know be like hey i'm looking for this card they'll dig through their files or hand you it or whatever their binders
Or you can even go online. So they don't sell singles off the bat, but once everything is out there, they'll start to do that. Yeah, once it's been out. Once they're in circulation, they're viable. How much would cloud be if I just wanted cloud? so like okay so there was a lord of the rings one of these right oh yeah before in the past how much the one ring car That's one of the most expensive, like that.
Oh, fuck. Did I pick a really expensive one? Oh, yeah. I mean, because the one ring is like the thing like Post Malone owns it and he paid how many millions of dollars for it? Oh, paid a lot. So can I pick it? Do you think I can name anything else from Lord of the Rings? Yeah, let's see. If I wanted a Gandalf card, how much is Gandalf? Let's see right now. How much is Gandalf? You can buy Gandalf right now. Gandalf the White, if that's the one that you want.
Let's see if you can get him for 88 cents. That's so many. Okay, so Gandalf White is like $2.50 is what I'm seeing. But you can also get a different version that's like $0.88. So I mean, it kind of depends. $2.50 or $250? $2. Well, that's not bad. How much is Spongebob? Was part of a secret lair, which is what they call their like cards that aren't official. They're basically like re-skins. Yeah, basically.
Okay, so you can actually still go on the secret lair. I bought a website called MTG Goldfish. And it's very funny to see Squidward in something called Knight's Whisper Secret Lair. Yeah. Okay. All right. So the difference between, oh, this is actually a hot topic in the magic community, right?
Secret Lairs used to be what they would do for like IPs and stuff like that, like Fortnite type crossover stuff where it's like, we're going to have SpongeBob in the game, where they're not actually making new cards. for the ip um if you look at any of the spongebob ones it'll have like a new name on the top but then underneath it says the official card that it is just a skin of basically um and you can even and like you can
type in, right, like Magic the Gathering Bloodborne deck. And you can find people who will make entire decks that look like something else, but they're just, they're basically secret layers. They're basically just proxies of something else. But now with IPs, they're starting to actually give them their own cards and like unique identity. And so that's what they're doing with Final Fantasy. That's what they're doing with Spider-Man this year. They're doing it with Avatar.
And there's some people who are very upset about that because they're like, oh, we're, you know, not giving enough attention to the actual worlds established in magic. Now it's just all crossover shit. Sorry, not to be crazy. Haven't they been making Match the Gathering cards for 50 fucking years? Like 30, but yeah, like still a long, long ass time.
Relax is how I feel. Yeah, that's, that's my thought too. It's like, it's not, it's not hurting anything. It's fine. Let them do their little, their little crossovers and collabs. It's not that deep. Can you imagine if Fortnite was around for 30 years before it ever tried to do any of that stuff? That would be crazy. After 30 years, Fortnite adds Ariana Grande. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, she's 58.
um god that'd be that'd be so wild um yeah all right okay okay so you're gonna bring you're gonna bring a deck test yes absolutely okay okay that sounds great i have yeah I have my little travel box, and I'll just make sure I bring a couple decks, and I'll let you pick whichever one looks cooler to you, and we can try it out. Amazing. Okay. I'm game to try it.
I don't know why. Maybe it will be like heroin. I won't be able to stop. It might. That's what they're calling it. That's exactly what they're calling it. Yeah. Well, good luck to both of you on your continued journey. Thank you so much. I really appreciate it. Let's talk about some games, huh? Some videojuegos. We got a big reveal. It was like awkwardly timed. I think it was like last Saturday. I can't remember. Yeah, it was Saturday. And that was deeply like...
Like, well, nothing else is happening that day. Like, I kind of respect the idea, like, oh, well... We'll get rid of this and we'll escape the cycle by doing it on a Saturday. But then it's like, ah, okay, congrats, weekend editor. I was two margaritas deep at lunch when the marathon trailers dropped. There was a... a cinematic trailer as well as the gameplay trailer.
I fell off a destiny a really long time ago. And we might as well remind folks that we have a good friend, Colin McGregor, out working at Bungie on Marathon. So take that with a grain of salt. Just an ethical... uh footnote there but i will say um this this especially the cinematic trailer had like the coolest vibe Based on vibes alone, I would like to try this video game. Jess, I cannot remember. Were you a Destiny person at all? And how is Marathon hitting you?
I'll be honest, it's cutting out so bad. I cannot hear you right now. I hope that it stops. You can't hear me right now. That's okay. Okay, I think we're back. Now we're okay. Maybe. We're back? Are we so fucking back? Okay, maybe. Nikki? It's over. It's over. Now we're back? Absolutely, John. Are we back? It's over. Now we're back. John, you also knock yourself down to 720. So we're sending Jess less pixels. Okay, we're going to send Jess less pixels.
We're going to do that. Let's send me less. I can't handle the pixels. Okay. Nikki, are you sending less pixels? I'm sending fewer pixels. Wow. We're all... Apparently my... Oh, wow. Like... Oh. What's so little pixels? We're going to go standard deaf now. Wow. Okay. Wow, it changes the aspect ratio. Yeah, the aspect ratio. I look long. I look like a fucking El Greco painting. It's weird. Nikki, we'll start with you. Okay, I know you play that. I can't look at you anymore.
You know that TikTok filter that's like, here's what you really look like to other people? We just went through the severance thing, right? Where our heads just like... So, Nikki, let's start with you. I know you've played a lot of Destiny in your day. Too much of it. What did you think of the marathon reveal, bud? fucking amped for this video game. I've never been more excited for a video game that I'm going to be bad at and then throw away. You know?
Like, I can't. I simply cannot wait. The one thing that Bungie is really, really good at is tone. Yeah. And I think something that people, when people started to fall off of destiny, it was because the, this, the. Well, part of the reason that I fell off of Destiny is because I was like, it's been the same shit for so long. Like, the stuff is cool, and if it was the first time I had seen it, then yes, absolutely, give it to me.
but I had been looking at the same thing for literally 10 years or not, I guess, 10 years exactly, but like five, five to seven years by the time I'd said I'm okay. So to have them have an opportunity to go, okay, clean slate. We can kind of do whatever the fuck we want. And also we have an understanding and a command of visual identity in a way that very few other studios do because we aren't really having to chase.
especially with this, they're not having to chase realism in any kind of way with destiny. They aren't, it's not faces, right? Like it doesn't have to look cyberpunk. I think looks bad. Because I don't think it looks very good. But part of the reason why is that they're trying to make it look like real life. And that uncanny valley is really deep when you try to get that realistic. Bungie is never really trying to do that. So when they do things like this with Marathon...
It looks like every, when I close my eyes and think about video games on the PlayStation 2. This is what they look like a little bit. So I'm really excited. The format of it, it like... The trailer, it's Ben Starr doing the trailer. By the way. That guy is getting an obscene amount of work. I mean, listen. I ain't fucking earned it. He's got to feed that dog. But wow. I was like, everything's got Ben's story in it now. Good for him.
I would love to just take a look at his like schedule because it is, I know his calendar. I mean, we should just ask him as you have to fucking pull up his schedule and be like, what you got in here, bud. Let me see your G-Cal. Share your Google Calendar with me, Benstar. Can we be Google Calendar friends? Share it with us. It looks like an insane finished Tetris board. Yeah. So I'm excited. The thing is, though, right, like it is an extraction shooter. So like the.
The skill floor is really high and the ceiling is really high. And games like that are fun if you are a certain kind of way. And very increasingly, I am realizing that I am not. that's not i don't think why i want to come to video games increasingly is for stuff like that um But the shooting's going to feel really good. The shooting's going to feel pretty good.
I'll probably play a lot of it and never be pretty good and never be very good at it, which is, I think, okay. Especially in an environment where it sounds like the game's going to be pretty small. out so I don't know if there will be enough in there for me to particularly burn myself out on because I think I might be like Sick. That was worth the $40 I gave you. And I'll come back later when there's more.
Jess, what about you? Were you a Destiny person? I can't remember. And then what did you think of Marathon's reveal? Oh, now we can't hear you.
what is happening that was that was actually my bad oh there you go that was on you okay thank god there was no there was no mute icon on the thing and i was like oh god oh bro all right sorry go ahead i muted on my my little mic um i also have one of those so i get it yeah um but yeah so i played a bit of destiny one when it came out in what like 2016 oh wait no 2014 when the fuck did that game come out
So I played that for probably a year or so. I got really into like Crucible and stuff. It was one of those things where I would like. In fact, what's funny is I think the thing that knocked it from being in my rotation of like, I'm going to come home and just play some Crucible for a few hours to like decompress was Overwatch coming out. So yeah, I played that for a while and I would just do a lot of Crucible.
And then I got really into Overwatch and that became kind of my new decompress shooter. And then when two came out, I was like, oh, I'm not going to like buy into it. It's like, I liked one, but I'm not going to like buy into the hype and pre-order because I got like the big thing of Destiny 1.
Like, I'm not going to do that because I'm realistically, I know how I am. I'm going to play it for a little bit and I'm not going to, you know, so I think I got it a little bit after launch, but then I did go, like I played. I played the first three. I've played most of the expansions. I haven't done the final shape and the one before that. But other than that, I've played everything. I remember, was it Witch Queen? And I like them. I'm one of those people to where it's so...
I know there's some people are super into the lore and they can like tell you like, okay, like sit down. I'm going to tell you the whole destiny story. I cannot do that. But when I'm actually playing it, love the vibes. Love the gameplay. It's all very fun. It's all very pretty to look at. You know, and like...
With Marathon 2, and based on what we've seen of previews, it looks like it is also going to be... like very artsy and cool to look at and visually interesting and the gunplay is going to be good so it's like that's really i feel like what you can ask for from that studio so it's like i'm excited for it um i will probably do
I don't know. I feel like I'm in the same boat as Nikki, where it's like, I'm going to spend $40 on it. I'm going to be very happy. And I'm gonna be like, this is a good game. I enjoy playing this. And then at some point, I will never go back to it. And it's nothing against the game. I just fall off of live service stuff. I'm not that type of... I'm not the core demographic for live service games.
No, no. I'm not either. I think y'all are exactly right, though. I mean, I think the gunplay plus the vibe... Plus it not looking like anything else out there. That's a combination that's good enough to get me in the door. GameSpot's own Tamar Hussein did a hands-on preview and go read his thoughts. Kind of came to the conclusion of like, this is... This is really cool and slick and great. I don't know if there's a whole lot here unless you just like...
Absolutely love extraction of shooters. I can't get enough of them. But I agree with a lot of people who have said the first team that gets... extraction shooter mechanics into kind of a state where it's super, super accessible and super, super fun is going to make like a bazillion dollars. I kind of agree with that. I think like the genre is.
but I'm kind of like the rest of us. I don't know if this is... my game i don't know if this is something that i'm gonna like play a ton of um all the time but like yeah i'm i i knew that it would have the color palette i knew it'd be slick but like I was very struck by the eight and a half minute cinematic trailer that they released. I really liked that. I think you should go watch it. We will link it in the show notes. Just as a piece of art, I think it's cool.
Yeah. Yeah. Just the way it's shot. Like if you've ever, if you've ever just really wanted to see something that you probably have not seen before in games, that's, that's one of those things. So, yeah, excited. Yeah, I think that's what's so refreshing about it is like a lot of times when games do like cyberpunk or, you know, any sort of like, I don't know this, like. Mad Max meets neon meets sci-fi. I don't know. Like, I just feel like there's a lot in that aesthetic that has been done before.
Um, but when I was watching everything for marathon, I'm like, this seems like they actually have like their own artistic vision that they're kind of executing on. And I also just have respect for them, like leaning into the artistry because I mean, I. I will always be like a style over like fidelity type person. And honestly, those games just hold up so much better anyway. Like it is.
I don't know. I've never been someone who's like, look at how realistic this looks. You can see the pores. I don't really fucking care. I want something that is interesting. And it definitely is very interesting. It has its own identity. It has it.
I mean, like, I guess it's not surprising. Look at like Destiny. Destiny definitely has its own like visual language for better and worse when it comes to like UI stuff sometimes. But yeah, and it seems like it's going to be very much like that. And I'm really excited to try it out. Me too. I'm psyched about it. Something else that we got. Oh, go ahead. Nikki, please. I was just going to say, it seems really small though. Yeah. The thing that I am, I am torn on.
And have questions about the open beta starts next week? Yes. Question mark? Is that true? I think so. Colin, let me in. Colin, I know that's not how it works. You know what? I'm fucking shameless. I'm literally going to text him right now. Yeah, text it and say, let me in also. And Jess, all the three of us want to get in. And then also acknowledge that you know explicitly that that's not how this works.
but say that I want Xbox code. Thanks. I'll take whatever, but whatever. It's going to be small and not from like... oh, it's a $40 game, which is probably how much it's going to cost. We don't have confirmation on that, but just based on Helldivers and Concord. And this is a game that seems to be about scaled that way because it's from the same initiative. from Sony. 40 to 50 seems correct. There's only a couple of maps. And I am... interested to see how much game there is.
um again especially if you're not trying to if you aren't the kind of person who is going to commit right 20 hours a map right like yeah they're sure that's 60 hours but like I don't know. Right. Like, is that something that you're going to do? Are these maps super dense? Like probably like Bungie is really good. I think they're going to be dense, but they've also like, it's, it's both kind of cool and a red flag. They, in the gameplay thing, we're like.
there's weather and you never know what you're going to get when you start. It's like, okay, so this means what you're trying to tell us is that. It's a little bit, we'll talk about it in a second. It's a little bit like what Mario Kart did with costumes. They basically just said,
These are all new characters, actually. So it's like, no, no, no. That's not really what that is. It's the same one now. Sometimes it's nighttime. It's the same one. You've got three maps, and now it's raining in one of them. That's not an extra map. you know, there's, there's a little bit of that. Artificial inflation of, of what you're getting. Yeah. Cause yeah. Cause if you do count the different iterations, if you have rain, snow, sun, right.
And then three exponentially, that means you have like 72 or whatever fucking variants of the map. We just kind of actually saw this with a different game called Frag Punk, which I think I might have played the most of that out of the three of us. I'm going to guess that I did. and like it doesn't have that many maps but they're like yeah but like every round is different because you got this like modifier and it's like
That novelty, though, only kind of lasts about half an hour. And then it's like, the maps all being the same and not being that many of them. starts to become very noticeable. And it's such an important ingredient in a game like that. And it's an important ingredient in a game like marathon. So unless, you know, they're super, super big or dense or whatever. Yeah, I do have concerns, I suppose. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. I have trust in them, I guess, because it's like...
maps that are about the size of a third of a patrol map in Destiny, but with the density of a halo map. Sounds tasty. Yeah. Have they been given the space and room to cook is a different question. Yeah. Especially when we consider all the bullshit that's been going on the last couple of years. Yeah, those teams are impacted. It's a hell of a time to be developing a game during all that. so we'll see I'm excited to play it confirmed Colin has gotten back to us already
He's actually given us codes right now. Wow, we're in. We're in. I'm playing it. We're all playing it right now. I did actually message him, and I thought you really meant that you got something. And I was like, oh, no. I have no response. Colin's probably looking at it right now like, John, you can't do this to me. No. Hey, I woke up at the fucking crack to watch the Mario Kart. Why? I don't know. Because I wanted to watch it. Because that game looks good to me.
No, for sure. But it was still there when you would have woken up. It's the first one of these that I think I've given a shit about in a long time. So I will say. What was the last Mario Kart you loved? Jess? You know, I like eight fine. Like I, it's weird because like, I've never been like, I want to just, I don't.
open up my switch and i'm like i want to play some mario kart like i just tend to not like for me it's like i need to be drunk with friends or something like that or like people are just over and we had an edible and now we want something to look at on the tv you know like that's that's when i play mario kart Absolutely. So, I mean, like, I like 8 enough, right? Because it provides me that whenever I...
But I feel like the last one that I maybe really loved was Double Bash, which is probably a very popular hot take. Nikki and I, Nikki and I both, we are. We diverge on so many things, but what are the things we... Oh, we're... Okay, we fucking hate Monster Hunter. We fucking hate Double Dash. Oh, really? It's for some reason we're just like simpatico on those things. I can't. why the hate it feels horrible it feels so bad all those fuckers slide around all the time
The swapping of the guys sucks. You can't like... it doesn't feel like i have any control it's smeary as fuck when you've got more than one person on the screen so funny but But I acknowledge that a lot of people with very good taste like Double Dash. Yeah, I thought that I said I like Double Dash and it was basically going to be like, I like Pikachu.
I think on any fucking other podcast, there was a little bit like, yeah, hell yeah, Jess. And we're just like, get the fuck off of our show double dash liker no i yeah i just i just uh i'm shocked actually that they haven't put Double Dash specifically. Oh, but maybe they will now that the GameCube games are in the backwards compatible. It's not backwards compatible. You don't know what I'm talking about.
They might toss that one in there. Because I have multiple friends who are wrong, just like you, Jess. Who have a switch. who have a switch and still are carrying around their game cube courtney beta i'm looking at you carry around their game cubes So they can play Double Dash even though they have a Nintendo Switch that can play a good one. Not like carry around, like have in their house. Oh, okay. I was like, wow. I don't know.
There's a Fendi in one hand and a GameCube in the other. And they're just walking around just like, here I am. My Birkin and my GameCube. Yeah. Do you need chapstick or do you need double dash? Just like, let me know which one you need. Um, that's really funny. Yeah. Um, so yeah, they did, they did, they did this little direct. I,
I go back and forth on whether or not I like these individual game directs. Ooh, I don't think I do mostly. I think there's no, there is nothing. I will say there's nothing they said today that they could not have said a couple of weeks ago. like there's nothing and it feels it is there's like a yes that's exactly right there's the artificiality yes of the drip feels like
Oh, like, okay. And at this point, we're close enough to the game being out. I'll just wait until I fucking play it. Like, it's Mario Kart. Like, I know there's a bunch of new stuff in it. You can jump different. I will run down a list of the things that we did get confirmed that are actual announcements that they could have put in a couple weeks ago, but we didn't know.
The free roam mode is not just like driving around wherever. There's a ton of shit to unlock. So there are P blocks and little missions and stuff you can do. So it kind of fleshes out the open world. That's something I expected, but it was nice to have that confirmation. Yes. The costumes that you pick up from the food basically turns into costumes, and those become individual entries in the character select screen.
You start with like four pages of characters and then it gets up to like fucking 15 pages. But most of those are just. copied, you know, costume dupes, basically, which is annoying that those are not silent characters. You have been able to switch skins in Super Smash Bros. like that series since the 64. Like you're telling me you couldn't make it to where I can just click the character.
Really? 100%. Really? I love the idea that you're going to have to sort by Mario. And then instead of showing you one Mario, there's going to be a grid of 15 Mario's on the screen. I think it's funny. It is funny. It is funny. You can actually do a charge jump in this, which makes the feather pickup a little strange because the feather pickup is a jump.
I guess you don't have to charge if you're doing that, but you can do a charge jump to basically get up on rails to avoid obstacles, all that stuff. uh that's kind of fun and cool um and just another thing i noticed is like it looks like they've reworked recomposed and re-recorded a bunch of soundtrack entries from like the entire Mario canon for this game. So from Yoshi's story, from Mario 2, from fucking N64, from Super Mario 64.
They played the Super Mario 64 theme as they showed a penguin driving off a cliff. Really funny. Good job. Someone's really smart. We saw a little bit more Donkey Kong, which people are actually fucking being... really weird. No, they're super normal. They're so not normal about the new Donkey Kong. He's questionable, John.
people are so weird about the new Donkey Kong they're like he's not big and serious and tough anymore I need the monkey daddy to be very very serious with me it's very strange yeah It's always so funny when like, there's just a small thing that's existed for like 30, 40 years and no one gives a shit. And like, just something like this happened. It's like.
You, like, I swear to God, two weeks ago, you did not care. It's okay. You're fine. You didn't care. You're okay. You didn't care. It wasn't on your radar. You weren't thinking about Donkey Kong this hard. I've never thought about Donkey Kong's eyes. No. I've never thought about Donkey Kong's eyes. It's true. I'm excited for this video. My...
There were a couple of things that I thought were classic Nintendo. Okay. You join a lot. And this is like, this is so deeply like. Oh, I know. This still really is your third online video. I know. You join a lobby. They have not explained how you do that, which means that it fucking sucks to do. You join the lobby with your friends. You can free roam. They did not specify if you could do any of the open world stuff like the P block.
Or like that exploration stuff. They did not say if you could do that with friends or not. You see, you have to have insight and then you have to ring a hunter's bell. And then they can join the game. It's the only way that they can join at the bottom of the screen at all times. It just says start game press plus. The whole time. Was it designed for an arcade cabinet? There are multiple clips. That's what it feels like. It feels like you're playing the attract screen. It's so inexplicable to me.
Because very clearly they don't want you to do it. They want you to get in there and use it as a lobby so that you can then go do the regular races and not fuck around on the map the whole time. Because if that was the case and you would be able to just join in free room and they wouldn't be trying to push you.
out of it. I don't think that you're going to be able to do the P block stuff or like the deeper exploration stuff with other people. I think you are going to be able to drive around in the space. or do the battle mode. And I think that's it. But that is me just reading a lot into one UI element being on the screen. No, I think that you're right, though. And I think that overall, I mean...
It's so funny because we just talked about this with Bungie and with the maps and marathon and stuff. And it's like. It even kind of ties into this game having its own little showcase this morning, right? Where there's just so much of that artificial inflation of content because they want to prove. It's like...
You made it $80 because you know that people will pay $80 for a Mario game, like a Mario Kart game. Like, that's why you did it. And that's okay. That's fine. Just fucking own it. Just own it. Because, like, you did this whole other showcase today, and it's like, you could have just thrown in everything that...
You went over today, like tack on two extra minutes into the presentation you already did and we'd be covered. We'd be good. But like you wanted to have the secondary thing to like roll out another red carpet for this game to make it feel grander than it is. And it's like, you're just at that point. I get hyping up your own stuff. But when you do that, you're also asking for more eyes to be on it. And with more eyes comes more scrutiny. So it's like, do you really want this? Because like...
At the end of the day, there's a lot of things that you look at and you're like, well, that's cool. It looks like a great game. It looks fun. I will get it because it's Mario Kart and I like to have stuff to play with friends and it'll be good for that. I don't know. You don't need to treat it like it's the second coming. Yeah. Right. You know? Yeah. It's just Mario Kart game. Like, it's not. I am. I. This one is going to be decisive amongst normal people.
Because there was a thing in there that kind of was a little bit of a throwaway. They were like, you have to drive to the next course. And it's hard to know because like. None of us have played it. I don't know how far the courses are in between. But even if you're doing a Grand Prix.
You finish the race. You got to drive to the next one. I feel like there are going to be people who are like, I don't want to do that. I agree. The way this looked, though, I think people had that concern when I was watching the past couple of... directs that had Mario Kart in it. The way this appears to work based on the treehouse footage that I've seen and then from the other stuff is that like the
Maybe we're talking maybe like a 15% longer each time, but it's essentially like the race starts now for the next thing. Like on the way there, you're racing. You're racing all the way there. I understand. So what it's doing is it's doing checkpoints as laps, like Forza Horizon. So like, I thought that was the knockout. It's both.
From what I understood during The Treehouse. That's really confusing. Now, if you're at home and you watched all this stuff and you're like, no, no, John, you're a fucking moron. I can't believe how dumb you are. just write on the discord or send me a message on blue sky. But when I watched the, I watched like all 30 minutes of them doing the grand prix mode and the knockout mode.
And it looks like when you're doing the Grand Prix mode and you're quote unquote driving to the next one, the race starts then and you're hitting checkpoints that are moving the lap counter. So it feels like a little bit inflated for them to be like, well, you're now doing this other thing in addition to starting. It's like, I think it might be a 15% increase, but not like. It's not like doubling what you're doing, which would, I think.
be like a non-starter for a lot of people yeah yeah it reminds me of like there's that one level in eight right where it's like you're you're skiing essentially and it's not you're not doing laps you're just going straight down um so kind of i guess it's like that where it's more you're just like
Your laps are divisions of the actual track itself and not circuits. I think they're giving up the idea that it has to be a circuit. It looks like there are a couple of circuits, but they've built these to essentially be these more open-ended.
like, you know, oh, okay, you're at the end, but you have not made a full loop kind of courses. So, like, that's what it appears to be to me. But I still do have the concern, kind of, though, of, like, if this is a get in, get out with your friends, not only... The grid size is ballooned to 24. So how many people are going to be in and out of these things? It's going to be so awesome. For the most annoying person you know to come in 19. I think that's great. That is great.
But it's like there are there are factors here that are making me go like for a sicko like me, it's making me more likely to fire this game up by myself. But for the normal fan of this game. This seems like friction to me, like in a way that I don't think the other ones have had. Because I wonder if Nintendo's argument would be like, oh, actually, the amount of time between the end of one race and the start of another one is about the same amount of time that ending the race in Mario Kart 8.
And pressing the button, having the game load the next one. watching the intro movie, and then starting the next one. I'm sure they probably have timed that out such to be like, well, that takes 30 seconds. That takes 30 to 45 seconds, 45 seconds generously. If we're going to just have the whole map stream into you open because it's an open world game, that's about how long it's going to take you to get from point B to point C.
I wonder if that is the argument, but we'll have to wait until the game comes out because they're pretty bad at answering questions. I'll deliver my one take that I don't even remember. I was like joking with friends and I said this like years ago. But it still rings true is my one dumb take is.
I like, I don't mind having loading screens because it gives me a little break, gives me a little time to make sure that nobody's texting me, that I can take a little drink. So like, that's because I remember we were joking about like, oh, but if you get like. you know, this, so much faster loading times. And I'm like, I don't mind the 15 seconds. It's okay. Yeah, I'll be fine. You know, it's nice. So I mean, that's kind of my thought with with the track. It's like
You're going from, I mean, I don't know how long the average Mario, like maybe three minutes or something like that. You're going from three minutes of like playing this to, okay, you get like 20 seconds, 30 seconds, relax, whatever. Then you go back to it to where it's like, you are just going to be going now instead of like 10 minutes straight.
which right yeah you're locked in you know like i like if i'm playing a match that's different it is yeah it's like a way like much more intense vibe like if i'm playing something like overwatch i kind of know that i'm getting in on that but like
When you have a bunch of people who are hanging over at your house, like just friends hanging out, it's like to know that you have to be locked in holding this controller for 10 minutes straight. Like that's kind of, for a party game, it's kind of intense.
It stresses me out a little bit. I have watched this and been like, all right, when I go play this online, I know that I'm just going to be... sitting there for 25 minutes without yeah like i'm committing i'm now committing to like something that feels
a little bit bigger you know like it feels almost like i'm committing to a hell divers run or like you know where it's like okay well i don't know if i come to this for that feeling but yes okay like if we finish If you finish a race and you come in for... Do you not then start the next race also in fourth? What's the point? Yeah, they what they've done is they've essentially just gotten rid of the like.
They've gotten rid of the idea of like now that you have a new starting grid and it's based on the positions you were. It's kind of like... You don't do that anymore. You don't do that anymore. And I guess, I guess, I guess. Cause it was, cause it's rolling starts to now, which I think is. I guess what I'm. Okay. Now, now, now it's time for me to reveal that I actually now do think I am confused about how these two modes work. because... Because...
They very explicitly said in Grand Primo, now you just drive the next track. They've said that. I've watched the clubhouse where they do that. The problem is that the routing might be different, but also the problem. Oh, you're right. The routing is different. Because it's like knockout is longer and it's different courses. So I think that might be the difference because otherwise, like I don't really see the difference except that one of them knocks you out if you're lower.
So how far behind can you get? If only anybody knew. If only they had explained in the individual showcase they held this morning. Exactly. That's such a good idea. They should have done 15 individual specific minutes just on Mario. Would have been cool. We'll find out on June 8th. We'll find out on June 5th when we live in... Estonia and can get one there, but not here. Yeah. Anyway, Nikki, you've been playing a lot of blueprints. And now you...
Can you talk to me about Blueprints, which is a game that I like quite a lot, but people have been deranged about online. I agree with you. There was a period of time where people were like... They've been really deranged about it. People are like, this game defies definition. It doesn't. We can't. It doesn't. There's no way to talk about it. No, you can talk about it. It's Bellatro and there's mist in it. That's it.
That's all they did. It's a click. It's a click. You walk around, you click stuff. Yeah. It's not, it's not that complicated. It's pretty easy to describe, actually. I will say when, what it, oh, go ahead. Oh, no, I was gonna say like, there's cleverness in there, right? Like, the more you do stuff with like, Yes, the power grid and even like the foundation and like having to have the door facing like the one side so you can hit the operating like like there is some stuff in there that's like.
very cool and interesting and like for instance like if i were to review the game right and like i'm just it's this is my lazy way of just saying how much i would i would give it like eight and a half nine or you know i mean something like it'd be somewhere in the eight to nine thing but i know a lot of people act like it is the greatest game like it is for sure you know and it's like
I'm not there. I think it's really fun. I'm having a really good time with it. It's like, you know, I've been playing it with Andrew and it's fun to be like, oh, okay, let's do our little like puzzles tonight and do like, you know, we'll eat for two days or something like that. You know, like it's fun, but I don't, I don't know. I don't hold it to the same esteem as it seems like a lot of our peers do. Nothing against that. I totally get it. It's a fun game, but just not. I totally get it.
I also want to be really careful because it's a thing that definitely has spoilers that are mechanical. And I do think that when this game swims... it really is nice. Like the, the number, the amount, like when you have momentum in this game where you're solving stuff, solving stuff, solving stuff, getting through like, and it's progressing, it's progressing, it's progressing. It is kind of incredible. But it's not incredible from a mechanical perspective. Yeah, I agree with that.
It is incredible because my brain is working. So, which is like, yes, that is the game. The game is the one that's doing that. But like... I'm getting myself off. Finally, something got Nikki to think. Finally. I can't believe it. It's not the vibrator. I'm getting myself off. No, I'm getting myself off. Like, it's not the game. That's yelling at your Hitachi. You did this? Fuck you. Yeah. I control them.
i press you know so that's it's me so it's like yes the game is is enabling that but it's like i'm i am thinking and that is the part of the game that is right yeah so My problem with it currently. is that I had such a good four hours with the game on Tuesday, where I made an unbelievable amount of progress. I made so much progress. I am now in the endgame.
It has been two days. I have made zero progress. It feels horrible. And it's not because of anything. The game really relies on you, the player. making the connections in your mind to put the stuff together. Now we're out of that point. Now I'm butting my head up against a brick wall because so much of this is RNG that I can't control.
What the fuck? How long is it going to take? How many runs? How much time do I now feel like I'm wasting? It doesn't feel like I'm productive in the amount of time. It's like, yeah, I know exactly what I need to do and the game is not letting me do it. I a thousand percent. It's a bummer. That's so valid. Like, I definitely get that. And I would imagine that that's one of the hardest things with making a roguelite or roguelike, you know, it's like you have to.
ensure that the things that carry over are meaningful enough to where like you're giving players a sense of like agency and being somewhat in control of a lot of random shit and i do think from what i've experienced because it's like you get Without going too much into spoilers, but you like you get like what four extra rooms or whatever. And you get, you know, like.
you have an allowance so you'll start with more money and like you have all these things that do exist to kind of be like you did this so many times and now you get this little bonus and this makes it easier the next time but at the same time it doesn't feel like there's anything that's like
meaningful enough to where it's like you get to the point where you are Nikki where it's like you know what you need to do you've done this a million times and now you just need to not get fucked over by you know and there's certain things that you can do to like you know, counter that. Yeah, you can manipulate it. But there's, so the connection that I have made just now in my brain, when you're really struggling in the video game Fortnite.
That game will increase the number of bots in your lobby until you start feeling like you're having a good time again. And it's just a dynamic number. If you're really, really struggling, they're like... Have a fucking W, bud. Yeah. Like, get in there. And I understand that the loop in that game is completely different. Their goal is to, they're actively trying to extract money from you.
Jess, you're still here. You just don't have video. I don't know why it just turned off randomly. That's so weird. I'll figure it out. But I'm still here. I still am listening. Okay, good. Good, good, good. There's manipulation that is happening. And for me, a person who plays video games for money, I can see it. For most people, they aren't noticing. Right. That is like that. So which means that actually it's great. And it definitely is.
There's no reason why after you check, like after you mark these flags in this game, the game is not like, oh, here you go. Here you go. Like, you just did this. You're out of it. Absolutely. Congratulations. You just did this. We are going to railroad you to the next thing so you can finish the fucking video game.
And I'm sure like it could be like it could be after five, like the first four or yeah, fuck around, fuck around, fuck around. You hit the fifth one and they're like, OK, absolutely go. That hand-holding does not feel like it is there in the way that I desperately, desperately think the game would be better served. I'm going to actually continue the metaphor. This feels like the game thinks it's edging you, but this isn't edging.
like like like no really it's like once you get it's like it's like i've gone on the journey like we've done the teasing we've done everything I've done it. I'm at the fucking precipice and I'm starting to get mad at you. Blue prints, more like blue balls. Yeah! Yeah! Fucking got it! But it's like, that's what, to me, it's like, I think if you do get up to that, that makes sense. What I hear, because I'm not far enough in this game to really know, but it's like...
If you're banging your head against the door to finish this, this feels like how it would feel to me if the purpose of playing Bellatro for me was to get one of those insane like... 800 trillion number score with like a million like like i don't give a little bit exponential i don't give a fuck about doing that so if if you get to the point in blueprints where it's like okay you're just waiting for that joker yeah to show up that gets you that that's annoying as fuck like that's really annoying
Now you can start manipulating that stuff in Bellatro, but I don't know if you can start manipulating it to that degree in blueprints. In blueprints. And from what I can tell. You can't. You can't. So fundamentally, you can you can change the cards that are in the deck. There are ways to do that. But like. I have been trying to get just a combination of things to happen. And it just doesn't.
And it's like, and sometimes it's like, I'm mostly there, but I can't rotate the fucking rooms. So the room, the room, I get the room, but actually if I pick the room, it blocks me off. So I can't actually even get to the point I'm trying to get to. I do everything right. And they still indicted. Yep. You know, like there's no, there's no, it's just like, it's frustrating when it's like, you're like, there's no way I could have avoided this.
outcome and like that's very annoying because it's like there is nothing on my end that like could have it's like there were no more dice there's no more keys there's no more gems so it's not like I could pick that like there I have no options Like and it's not like each, you know, time that you do this each day, you're guaranteed to like, oh, but you know, now you can put points into this. So you'll like you can't.
synergize to that degree there's not that many knobs to turn so it gets frustrating yeah it makes sense yeah yeah but I will say, I feel like we just dunked on this game. Oh, it's good. It's a really good game. For a long time. It's excellent. Like, the vibes are really good. The music is incredible. I hit, like... You've made a discovery music in this game. Is some of the most handholdy, like, you just did the thing, it does sound like a celebration in your brain kind of stuff.
The ways that some of the items that you pick up can interact is really unexpected. I just put together a bunch of items just a run I did the other day, and I was like, why would I be able to do that? Why would I be able to do that? which is really nice there's a bunch of the number of puzzles in this game that I know are puzzles, but I have literally no idea what to do with them. It's really exciting to me because I do know that they all have answers.
So every time I see something new about it, I'm like, oh, let me fucking rifle through. my notes about it to see like this is all of this whole page is just one fucking puzzle The fucking scribblings of a madman. unbelievable yeah i don't i have no idea what this will my husband just sent me but it does lead to some no my husband just sent me um because like whenever he takes the notes versus when i do in our game that we're playing together it's like he'll just put down a few bullet points
And then I'm just like, you know, and so he sent me a photo and it's like this one guy who highlights the entire fucking page of a textbook. And it's like, it's all important. It's all important. What are the number of tiles in this room? Yeah. That's really good. Yeah, like how many tiles are there? What time is it? There's a lot of clocks in that. I don't know what's up with the den yet, so no spoilers.
But every time I go in there, Andrew gives me so much shit because I'm like, there's something with the clocks. Why are there so many clocks? There's something with the fucking clocks. Why are there so many clocks? I sound like MAGA. Why are there so many comics? I don't like it. This is super early, but the first time I got the dart puzzle in the billiard room... My ass was counting like... The balls on the counter.
the the chalk that's so funny i'm like going over there and i'm going what about this one it's just like no i'm like what could they what could they fucking be I went over to the bottles in the bar I'm like Seven bottles? It's seven. And I think like seven was the first number and I clicked it. It's like, yep. And I was like, whoa, you know, I just like, it took me like.
It took me like 10 minutes, but like once I figured it out, I was like, oh. It is the funniest shit. And you start to just do that over and over again. Yeah, the number of those O's is really good. There was a puzzle that I was taking notes for. Yeah. And I just, like, I thought I was so fucking smart. I was like, oh, this is, oh, I know what this is. Yeah. Is it the pictures? I know exactly what this is. And then I read a, I did the same fucking thing. And then I read a book that was like.
Yeah, I read a book that was like, you're not doing it right. And I was like, mother fuck. So then I had to start over. Like all of the progress that I had made on the puzzle. I did the same thing. I thought it was. room versus location you know what i mean and so i was writing all this shit down and then i realized i'm like it's a fucking grid and i was so i was so mad but yeah so i know exactly the same thing yeah
That's really good. Yeah, that's really good. So I think the game's pretty good, except for the parts that I don't like. Except for the parts that you don't like. So that's my criticism. That's your crit. They're calling me the Austin Walker. You can hear Nikki's four hours of blueprints print over on whatever. On Side Story. I'm glad that's back. All right. I've been playing Final Fantasy VII Reaper. Actually, now in earnest. A million years ago, I put it down because I was like...
This game is so fucking bloated. I don't like it. It's bad. It stinks. It's horrible. Everything I love about remake, they basically stripped away. I just want to spend time with my friends. I don't want to do any of this bullshit. When I picked it back up two weeks ago, I said, what if I just didn't give a fuck about anything else except for doing the game? Really good game. If I just put everything about it I don't like in a different room. Yeah.
It's really good. And I keep saying that this game is bloated, but I'm now determined that's a lazy way to say this. The game is full of content that is not good. frankly like it's not just that it's there's a lot to do it's just that a lot of it sucks um And the stuff that really, really works, the like moment to moment, like.
story beat stuff and a lot of the battles that you go through and a lot of like the locations you visit um are actually really interesting and still really lovely and i've made a ton of progress in this game and i think it's a lot of fun now am i under leveled yes Am I like a million levels behind in Queen's blood? And every time I enter a town, they're like, what the fuck are you doing? You're like a baby. You don't even know anything. Who are you?
Yeah, all that stuff is happening and I'm sad about it. But yeah, I just... I just wanted to say. Can you spend real money to level up about it? No. Would you? In this specific scenario, this is a thing that I never would endorse. I don't think I would. But in this specific scenario where you aren't engaging with the open world bullshit.
but you're deeply underleveled, would you kick them $15 to get Cloud and his pals to the correct level so you didn't have to struggle your way through? I wouldn't do that, but I would. I would. I would like figure out the way to get a save file onto my. machine that did that. Yeah, no, for sure. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I would do that. Jess, I know you play Rebirth, right? Yeah. Do you like this game? Yeah.
So I loved it. You loved it. Because, I mean, it's so funny. Whenever I was playing it, I went so sicko mode on that game. I wasn't even the one who was reviewing it for us. I don't remember why. Oh, because.
tam did um the first part and he was like yeah since i did the first part we'll keep it consistent i'll do the second one i'm like totally fine he's like but don't worry like i'm still gonna give you a code for it so i got the code like two and a half weeks three weeks before the game came out um yeah I think I beat the game in like five or six days. Like I just like, and that was like, I feel like 70 hours into it. So, I mean, that tells you where, what I was doing. Yeah. And like.
I really, I loved it. I loved it a lot. But at the same time, I can admit that I love it and I do see the faults in it and stuff like that. Like to me. I was like, this is a perfect game. I never want to not be playing this game. But, you know, for instance, when we did game of the year conversations last year, there were a lot of people who were really upset that like Final Fantasy actually wasn't in our top 10.
And it wasn't my top 10. It was like number three for me. You know, like I love that game. But whenever... You know, we were in discussions about kicking it out of our top 10. Everybody kind of turns to me like, are you going to defend it? Are you going to? And I was like, no, I'm like, I'm not going to fight for it because I'm going to use up my annoying fight for it on something else.
so I'm not gonna like I get it I love that game it is on my list it has a place in my heart but it is deeply flawed and I get the people who don't like all the extra shit that is not as fun because i it's it's not But there is like a flow it gets into. I think really I was struggling with like...
I was struggling with the open world area near Junon, and I thought the boat ride was just like a little bit too long between the continents. I was like, they really padded this out with stuff that you have to do, which I was frustrated with. I've gotten into this like thing where I was like, okay, I did the.
the crazy thing spoilers spoilers for a game that's like a year old at this point but like you know i did this crazy thing where tifa gets swallowed by the weapon and and like all that stuff was like really compelling and you're following her around and um i i just like
chunk of this game i would say you get to you get you meet sid you go to cosmo canyon like that all that stuff has been hitting so hard for me that i'm like okay like i think I probably owed it to myself to just like strip away the stuff I don't like as much as I can. and try to get through it so if you're like me because i know a lot of you are out there especially in our discord um who bounced off this because of that bloat
You can kind of get yourself out of it. And also, like, if the game is too hard, just crank, like, put it down to easy. Who gives a shit? Like, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Who's grading you on that? No one. Not me. Not me. Better way to play video games. Better way to play it. Just go through it. So I've been doing that.
Jess, what have you been playing? Have you been playing anything? I've been playing some Blueprints. I feel like that's the biggest thing. I've been playing a little bit. I've started it, so playing is kind of... What's the word I'm looking for? I've started it. Too generous. There we go. I'm not allowed to talk about it, but I've started Clear Obscura because that game comes out next week.
Yeah, it comes out a week. Yes. So, I mean, that's really it. Cool. And I kind of gave my feelings on blueprints. I think it's... really fun and i'm at the point where i'm still hitting discoveries enough to where like i don't have that frustration but i can totally already see like
kind of the cracks in the foundation and like how, you know what I mean? So like everything you're saying, Nikki, I'm like, I felt, I'm like, I can see why you say that. And it's kind of like what I feared would be a thing. Overall, great experience though. Yeah, I just feel like where I'm at now on that metaphor is I can, the other discoveries. a glass box that i can see with my eyes and i just can't like i just can't yeah yeah get in there yeah um so i'll turn this off and i'll
Finish this podcast and I'll go back in there. And then I'll remember where I was in the run I was doing before this. And then it won't work. I'll do it again until I get mad. Back to the blueprints minds for Nikki. Have you been playing anything else, Nikki? I started South of Midnight, which literally means I started it, watched five minutes of the first cutscene and said...
I have to go back and finish Blueprints. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm not playing more of South of Midnight. I thought I would before we recorded this podcast. I haven't. I still think that's a much more... interesting game than i expected it to be i think um just in terms of kind of its its structure and its themes um battle system still is you know combat's like still a little i think uh
It's just basic. I was going to say, I've heard that the combat is generic, but not necessarily derogatory, right? It's serviceable. No. I've heard that it leans a lot more into horror than I thought it would, though, which is pretty cool. Yeah, I mean, there's like, well, yeah, I mean, there's there's definitely like, you know, creepy stuff happening, but also.
you know, just like emotional stuff happening too. So it's like, it's yeah. It's dark subject matter. Something. Yeah. Something I'm realizing as I get older. Is that I have less bandwidth, I think, to play more than one thing at a time. Yeah. Same. And I don't know what that is. Because there was a period of time where I would have… Like when we were at Fanbyte. Yeah.
I could be playing like three or four things at the same time, kind of like bouncing, bouncing between them and making progress in all of them. But now like it is. feels impossible like yesterday i tried to play fortnight and i got pissed i think was already kind of pissed off but like i was i was i was trying to play fortnight i was like i don't
want to be doing this. I don't want to be doing this. If I was going to play something right now, I would be playing Blueprints, but I'm mad at that, so I don't actually think I want to be playing anything right now. Which I can't tell if it's like just a me thing, but it sounds like maybe it is not. No, I have trouble doing that. I'm the same way. And it's funny that you say that because it's not something that I really think about.
But yeah, I used to be able to, I used to even be able to do that shit with like book series. Like if I was in the middle of one series that like, you know, cause if something is like six books long, right. You get through two of them and you're like, Ooh, I need a break. But.
It's hard for me to even do that shit now because my mind is still just like... in that so i'm like so where i start reading something else and i'm just like oh i should just finish up that and i do the same thing with games too yeah finish the other thing yeah Yep. C'est la vie. All right. Hey, let's answer some hype questions. Every single week, you can go to vgps.com slash join. Join the hive. If you join the hive, you can go to our...
wonderful Discord, which is free to join. But if you are a Hive member, you can go down to the Hive category, go to the Hive content channel, ask us questions. We have a lot of really good ones this week. And we will start with. Yeah, a lot of good questions. A lot of good ones, actually. Listen, folks, BGB is Hive. I love you. Some weeks y'all are batting like... 200. Okay.
You know what? The fucking Texas Rangers are batting 200 and they do it professionally. They're being paid to do it. It's not you. It's just the state of the world. It's hard to come up with good questions. This week, y'all are batting like 800. It's like, it's kind of great. It's like if Aaron Judge and Babe Ruth were on like the same lineup, Mike Trout, Otani, all up and down. It's really good.
Let's start with maybe my favorite one, which is so simple. But Jason just asked, what music are y'all digging lately? Which I love talking about music. I've been blasting anxiety by nature. Because Nikki just can't get enough of that. of that fucking song. I just love Gautier. Gautier, yeah. No, I saw Dochi Black. Oh, shit, that's cool. A week and a half ago. Which was a lot of fun. And then I was like, damn. Remember Doshi? From three months ago. Yep.
so that's been really like that song is really really good i love a i love a sample and i think this is how i know i'm old is that she's sampling a song that I listen to. Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. And I'm like, oh, that's so fun. And then it's also like, oh. Oh, whoops. Damn.
It's like one of those things where, you know, oh, if you're old enough to where artists start sampling songs you grew up with, you might need to think about like grabbing one of those handles to help you get out of your car and shit. Uh-huh. Yeah. Uh-huh. Yeah. That makes a lot of sense. What about you, Jess? Lucy Dacus just came out with a new album. It's really good if you're into the moody girl music. But I feel like this album's a little bit more lovey.
Because now she's with Julian Baker. She is lovely now. That's very exciting. So yeah, that's like what I'm listening to. Do you think... Jess, I feel like you may be poised to talk about this with me. And if not, that's okay. Do you think Lorde's music got worse because she got happy? It was funny. yeah i think well okay so i think yes right i think that part of it is like She just captured adolescence and that awkwardness so well. And then with Solar Power, she was like...
I'm going to be cheeky and I'm going to talk about, but it's like, how can you be cheeky when you also give off the vibe that you're subscribed to all of this because you're rich now? You know what I mean? Yeah, you're rich now. Yeah, and so I don't know. It does strike me. It strikes me as she can't tap back into that.
yeah yeah no which is so which is so fair but i feel like you should just start making different music but that's probably why she hasn't made an album in a minute it's really it would be really funny to listen to her sing the songs from that album it's like tennis courts like Like, you know, like those rich people can see from space. It's like, that's you, Lord. That's you. That's you now. That's you. You live there. That's you now. That's really funny. That's a good question.
I'm listening to this. I've never beaten the 40-year-old white man allegations. I'm listening to Bon Iver's new album. Sable, fable, very good. Does the tinned fish come out of the fucking iPod when you listen to it, brother? For those who missed it, I literally got an email from a fish wife, the 10 to fish company that was like, guess what? Bon Iver's got a new album out and we're collabing with him on a new fish. I thought that Nicki just did a very precise roast.
It was a really good roast. It would have been great, but it literally happened. So I had to, yeah, it was so embarrassing. Very good. But it's a great album. He promoted the album by playing a fucking pickup game of basketball in L.A., which was super funny to me. He's actually pretty good. He had a good fadeaway. I watched most of that game. That's good. He has a song he did with Danielle Heim called If Only I Could Wait from that album, which I think is very good.
I've been getting really into Big Thief, which is a kind of a weird folky band. And they do a song called Simulation Swarm, which will... undoubtedly be number one on my Spotify because I think I have listened to it literally 200 times in the past 202 weeks which is crazy actually it's really weird I got really fixated on it Faye Webster doesn't have a new album, but I've just been loving her stuff for...
I've also been listening to a lot of death grips. So it's like, cool. It's no big deal. Like it's just, I'm fine. Just regular. You're just normal. On a different podcast. I mentioned I'm losing my hair and I'm also just listening to a lot of death grips. So like everything is like. Good. Everything's fine. Yeah, you're just fine. I'm just fine. But that's a really good question. Thank you for asking it, Jason. What? I want to make sure I get this one. Sphinx asked last week's bringing up today.
What game comes to mind that was received as a mediocre game, but has somehow retained its retail price from when it was released? Now, we don't have an encyclopedic knowledge of this. But his example is Forspoken, a game that is, by most accounts, pretty mediocre, but it's still priced at its $70 value pretty much everywhere, which I think is, yes, yes. Yeah, that is kind of wild.
Every Nintendo. Pokemon Sword and Shield. Pokemon Scarlet and Violet. Mario Party. Super Mario Party. Jamboree. And it's like... that's my answer to this question is that like whether or not these games are mediocre i think is a is a different question the pokemon ones are absolutely yeah But, like, Nintendo games just hold their value for forever. Which, like, I think is then just market justification for...
games like Forspoken, which really, Forspoken feels like a rat, like they forgot. They don't even remember that it exists to put it on sale at some point. I turned on my Xbox yesterday to play Fortnite. And I got an ad that was like, just for you. So I pressed it. And they were like, will you please buy Borderlands 4 Ultimate Edition? It's $4. Wait, what? Yes. Is it just for you?
Sorry. I was going to say. I was like, whoa. I was like, whoa. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Brandy's like, buy this game that's not out yet for four bucks. Please do it. Borderlands, Borderlands. Please, please, please, please, please. Will you buy it? So it's like, that's a game that they remember they have.
And they've made all of the money they can. So if they put the game on sale for $3, the number of people who are going, that's actually, they're going to make an incredible amount of money off of that. They're not thinking about Forspoken. So on this point, though, I think we are about to be because of the economy. I think players choice is about to come. Oh, you do? You think so? I do think. All right.
Because I think that style of games pricing will come back because not this year or maybe even next year, but I think midway through the Switch generation, I think we will get a player's choice. edition of breath of the wild and like tears of the kingdom. Will the, will the boxes look better than the regular switch to boxes that will look worse. Okay, good.
And it'll be the border around. There's going to be four different borders like that. Like that Castlevania game where it's it's the Castlevania game box in the game box. It's going to be like that. But I think market forces might push. Towards that. Because there was something like. kind of sick about getting a red label ps2 game sure yeah because i didn't it didn't mean anything to me at the time but like now looking back i was like no like
I don't know. I got a great game for less. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A hundred percent. That was kind of neat. Um, so yeah, I think that's, I think that makes sense. That tracks that tracks. Um, Let's go with Craze asking, have you ever become a fan of a game without ever playing it? Absolutely, yes. I have a very enthusiastic answer for this. The Yakuza series. I have played 10 minutes of him, but I just, like, every single person I know who likes those games is just, like, a sweetheart.
And I've watched my husband play like good amounts of all of them because he really likes the series, especially... Like a Dragon, the newer one. I guess not the new Wisp, but with... Oh my gosh. Yeah. I say the new, the new protagonist. Um, and like. I would watch it and I'm just like, wow, this is like a very shockingly like kind of sweet game. And all of like, I don't know, there's a lot of positive masculinity in those games.
to where I see it. And I'm like, I appreciate what's going on here. And it's also just weird too. And I love games that are fucking weird. So between like the weirdness and the perspective on masculinity, I have played very little of any of those games. I really want to, it's just daunting. But I am a fan because they just, they're sweet. There's like a sweetness there. I look at them fondly. Yeah, that tracks. What about you, Nikki? I'm trying to think. You know what?
It couldn't be me. Well, can you read the question again? Have you ever become a fan of a game without ever playing it? A fan of it is different. Nah, it's different. I respect people who like clickums. People who like grid-based RTS. strategy games. I respect those people, but I don't like those games. No. But I am kind of like...
You're better than me. Absolutely. That's a computer game. What you're doing is you're playing a video game on the computer, and I respect that, but that's not what I want. That's not what I'm here for. That's not what I'm doing. No, that's not why I play. I guess I would... Yakuza series is a good poll because I really have not played much of that either. I played the most of Zero and haven't gone to other stuff. That's a good poll. I think I would probably say...
I've watched a lot of Castlevania Symphony of the Night speed runs, but I've never really played much of that game. I've played about 10 minutes of it. I'm like, whatever. But I do like that game a lot from the outside looking in. And yeah, we'll go with, well, also like Dark Souls 1, 2, and 3 in Bloodborne. Didn't play those, but really enjoyed watching those. That's a great one. Yeah. Yeah. Watching Marriott play those made me like those games is the only reason I played Elden Ring. Right.
Watching that stuff was the gateway drug to get me to play Elden Ring and then like Elden Ring a lot. I just haven't really gone back to the others. Okay, let's go with... My Hero Zero asking, what would you rather play right now? Final Fantasy Tactics, Vagrant Story, or Final Fantasy XII?
So it's an evil lease. Can I get like a cheeseburger instead? Okay, so Nikki wants a cheeseburger instead, does not want any of those games. Okay, Jess, what about you? It's an interesting question because I don't understand what they have. It's kind of, it's like, what would you like to eat right now? Like a bowl of cereal to fly to Italy and have like, I don't know. It's like not even quality. It's just very different. It's like, I don't.
What's the thread here? We never get any of that context in this question. It's just vibes. And there's another one? that I'm about to ask, that's even worse in terms of I need more information and you're not going to get it. I mean, tactics is probably my favorite out of those. I love Final Fantasy Tactics. Okay. So I'd probably go with that, but I've also been meaning to revisit 12 at some point because I know 12 got a lot of hate, but I feel like if you can just.
take it oh but it's so good yeah if you can just take it for what it is like i had a fun time playing with it playing it when it first came out so i kind of want to get back to it yeah you know Try it again. My Hero Zero, I think I would pick Final Fantasy XII right now. You know why? I want to spend 45 hours with Fran right now. That's what I want to do. Me too. Yeah, Fran Drescher.
Fran Tresher and Fran from Final Fantasy XII. No, I think I'd pick Final Fantasy XII, even though I do love the others very, very much. MCBingy asks, stupid. What's the have to get up and do a fire drill of video games? What does that mean? I don't know. We won't get more context. I'm just saying. So, you know, the feeling of being in school or at work, and then there's a fire drill that happens. The moment they announce another Animal Crossing, I will lose. I'll lose.
I was at... Okay, so you said getting up to do a fire drill a good thing? Because I take it to mean like, oh, it's like, oh, it's an annoying time to do this. So like probably like a mechanic. This is why they ask the questions. It's a different interpretation for all of us. So Nikki. You'd be very excited if they announced a new Animal Crossing. And that feels like a fire drill to you. You should be a live awake alert if the building's on fire. Got it. Got it. God, I'm trying to think of...
An answer for this. It's an interesting question. John, please feel free. Interesting is such a good way to say bad. I'm laughing at my own thoughts about this too because I'll tell you a story about a fire drill. Actually, it was a tornado drill. Nikki, have I told you this story? I can't remember. I probably have. But I was at a two-story school in Texas, and I was on the second floor.
Okay. And they came to me the morning of a tornado drill and said, John, we, we need to put you in the special chair and take you down the stairs because the, the. We have to know this works because the elevators will be turned off if there's a real tornado. And I was like, sure. I didn't know anything about it. I said, fine, sure.
The tornado drill hits and everyone gets out of the classroom and they come in with this small little chair. Just imagine like a small flat-backed, tall-backed chair with some, like a dolly, like a furniture dolly with a chair on it. And they go, John, it's time for you to cross your arms and we're going to strap you in.
And we're going to take you step by step down these 40 steps that are in the school. And when we get you down, you're facing away from the hallway. We're going to turn you around. and everyone you've ever known is going to be watching you doing this fucking cross-armed thing, rolling down the hall. I locked eyes with the girl I had a crush on. I was like... Put my head in the toilet and that's going to be it. Wouldn't it have been?
easier to just let me die in the fucking tornado yeah like just let me fucking go there's no point like what's the fucking point like it's like from the jump yeah To just put the kid in the wheelchair on the first, move the class downstairs. Right. Right. That would have been great. But instead, they were like, no, you never know where you'll be during a tornado.
And then I was like, I know where I'll be from this point forward. Fucking dead. Because I'm not going to get into that thing. It's fine. It's okay. So anyway, my version of that. would be if you sat me down and you're like, you have to win a StarCraft. battle right now. Right now. You have to do it. I'd be like, nah. Put me in the chair. I'm good.
That's my answer. It was a long answer. We'll be through the SGF. It's so funny because Jeff Keighley is going to be like, hey, hey, John, we don't know each other that well, but. We do need to kind of test something out. Do you want to? Yeah. Hideo Kojima is going to be watching you do this. You go down the stairs, it's just like Kojima and Sam Lake. Yeah.
shigeru miyamoto came over here to watch me do this holy shit um yeah but so i meant the entire time you were telling that story i was like i gotta be thinking and then a sentence into it i was like gone no i'm listening to the story god incredible um yeah yeah kind of i'm trying to think of like something that annoys me in a game whereas you know it's okay here's here's my like weird um like whenever i get to this i'm kind of just like oh i'm not a fan of ice levels
Ice levels. You know how everybody has that biome where they're just like, ah, this again. I know what's going to go on here. I feel like I usually am not into the ice or the snow levels. You know? Sometimes we can be okay. I like an ice biome. But they're always fucking with your locomotion. They're like, yeah, now you're slipping. Now you're slow in the snow. It's like, okay, I get it. I get it.
Okay. I like that answer. Dolphocus asks, what's the fastest you've ever driven a car? Love that question. 115, 120. 120. Okay. Probably 110. Was this just highway driving? Like just normal highway driving? You could do anything on the diagonal in Colorado. I used to live in the middle of nowhere in like northern Missouri when I was going to college. And I got off work at midnight.
on in a road that like there was nobody on that highway ever and i it's not even like i meant to but it'd be one of those things where you're just driving you're like i want to get home i want to get home and then you look and you're like oh shit i should not be going that fast Shut up. Going really fast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would say it's not that high for me. I think it's probably like 100 flat.
And I know where I was. They opened a toll road between Austin and San Antonio when I lived in Austin. And they opened it and like... I don't know. I don't remember if it cost a lot or whatever, but like fucking nobody was on that road for like a year. And the one or two times I went over to San Antonio, like the speed limit was 85, which I've never seen before.
And so they were like, you've got to book it on this fucking road. And it took like 45 minutes to get to San Antonio, which is crazy. And that's where I went. I went easy 100 for like a good chunk of that. I have such a vivid memory. I was deeply depressed because my car was fucked up. And I wanted to go see Captain or Miss Marvel. What's that movie called? Captain Marvel. Very badly. But no one wanted to go see it with me. So I had to go see it with myself.
I would have gone and seen it with you. Thanks, Sean. I had My mini was broken and I, they had given me, I had a regular mini, but the mini that they gave me was a, an S, which was just a four cylinder instead of a three cylinder. So it just went faster. And I took the 90. I was living with my mom at the time. And I saw the movie in the marina. So I just went down to Lawson. And it was the last showing of the night.
And I took the 90 and the 90 is like barely a freeway. There are streets that are wider and longer in this city than the 90 is. And the 90 is a highway. So I drove there and it was, I was regular, but on the way back, I was pretty fucking like juice. Cause I, at the time I really liked that movie, but I think I was just like, there was any endorphins in my body. So I said.
This is the best day of my whole life. And then I hit like one. I hit 100 in that rental car, which was nice. The fastest car you will ever drive is a rental. Yes. Yes. Yes. That's true. It doesn't even matter what it is. It doesn't matter what it is. We just have a couple more. MyHeroZero asks, what's the weirdest Mario-related character you'd love to see in Mario Kart World? What's that cloud fox name? He's in it. Mallow. Oh, Mallow.
Put Gino in the game. You want to put Gino in the game. I know my answer. Actually, I just thought of it. That was it. Get horny with it. Oh, God, that would rule. Because they did today, and this was also kind of what was breaking the internet. They did show for a nanosecond Pauline wearing what appears to be a latex bodysuit in one of the shots. People were getting... really fucking ribbled about it on blue sky and i was like calm down guys there's never been a better time to just
pay someone online to wear a latex bodysuit for you if you want to. It's like you can just do that. There's so many ways to accomplish the thing that you want. But still, that was interesting. So yeah, Bowsette would be interesting. I think that's a good answer. Oh, what's my answer? I would say just the disembodied moldable face from Mario from Mario 64. Yeah.
That'd be kind of fun. Oh, and then like before the level, before you load it, you can fuck the face. That would be good. That would be kind of fun. They should let you be the, like, they should let you be. Oh, like not the part with the head. Yeah. No, just no face. Let you pick just no face. Just one body sphere from a pokey. I think would be, that would be good. I feel like. Oh, another one is a fucking just.
The guys who, like the live action Mario Bros. from like 1989. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, Captain Lou Albano driving around. Yeah, 100%. Put them in like Mortal Kombat 1. Right. And have them look like that. And I think that would be awesome. That'd be really good. Danica Patrick is my find. Danica Patrick. That's interesting. I put Dale Earnhardt Sr. That's what I'd do. Just put them in there. What was the other one I wanted? Okay, which comes out first, Silksong or Star Citizen? Silksong.
I know you did this just to get me to do this, Jason, for asking the question. Silk songs never come. Okay. We've made this like five weeks in a row. It's not coming out. So. Anyway, I have to get the supercut together of me doing that. for when the game comes out, because it'll be really funny. My real question, my real answer is probably Star... No, no, Silk Song, because Star Citizen...
I'm not kidding. That's going to end in one of the biggest class action lawsuits in the history of our country. Should we get in now? And that's not a bit. I believe this is headed for one of the largest class national lawsuits in the history of this country. But that's the only reason I still have a Facebook. Yeah.
It's because like every, every two years I cash out like $215 from a different law. That's amazing. That someone has brought to Facebook. That's incredible. So should we, should we, how much is star citizen? How much does it cost to get in? $5. I don't know. I actually don't know. I should know the answer to that question. I don't. Okay. Okay. Okay. One more. Let's do one more. What kind of beverage and snack combo would hit the spot right now?
Cheeseburger. Yeah, Nicky already said cheeseburger like 15 minutes ago. Won't let it go. Like a dog with a bone. I want cheeseburger. You want a bevy with that? Nah, you know what? You know, it's fucking dire. I would fuck up a dirty mountain. You're so fucking disgusting. You're awful. I can't believe you brought this to our door.
putting coffee creamer. Do you know about this, Jess? They put coffee creamer in the Mountain Dew. Yeah. So, because like, isn't it, it became popular with like Mormon women, right? yeah yeah the creamer and now and now everyone else has so did fucking soaking but you don't hear any of us like knocking down people's door to do that like we don't want to do like just
Leave us with the real stuff. I don't need to put coffee creamer in a fucking Mountain Dew. I don't even drink soda like that, but I have idly been thinking about, damn, it would be nice if I had one of those guys. Okay. With like a McDonald's French fries. Ooh, okay. All right. Would be a good combo. Okay.
I'm kind of cheating because it's literally my husband was on dinner duty tonight while I recorded this podcast and he texted me in the middle. I just feel like ordering. And I was like, that's totally fine. So I'm cheating a little bit because it's what I ordered. And I am getting a, there's a place called Chuck's hot chicken near where I live. And it's like, just like spicy chicken sandwiches.
So after this, I'm going home, AKA just upstairs to a chicken sandwich and a sweet pea, like a true Midwestern princess. Wow. That's amazing. That sounds so good. Um, I'm also cheating because right after this, I'm going to Hurtado barbecue and I know I'm going to get. I know I'm getting a jalapeno glazed half chicken and a Topo Chico with lime. And I'm so fucking excited. I'm so excited. I texted Anne. I'm like, order me this.
So she's going to order it, and I'm going to go up and meet her up there with her brother, and I'm going to eat that. I'm so mad. That sounds real good. I think you win. Hurtado barbecue. Whenever y'all come to Arlington, we got to go to Hurtado barbecue. It's really good. We're going to go to we're going to go to a renegade game. Nikki. A box seat for the year costs $500. So we should do that for real, for sure. Yeah. I'm not kidding. I looked it up. Yeah. Yeah. It's really cheap. Yeah.
Flights to Dallas. We can't do that bad. It's the middle of the country. Oh, look. Southwest.com. LA to Dallas is pretty easy. I live like 10 minutes from that. Everybody's on that flight. Everyone's on that flight. All right. That was our snack and Bev combo. That was a good question. I am now reading our reviews of the podcast on the show, and we do have one this week, a five-star review. Thank you so much. From keyboard smash, because it's a bunch of just words.
Thank you so much. The Jungle Gems of Podcast. is the name of the review. Thank you so much. It says, they have everything you could want when you go shopping at the podcast store and an animatronic lion impersonating Elvis berating you with music as you look at a wall of jelly beans. Thanks. Thanks, Reviewer. We really appreciate that.
Thank you. Thank you. I don't know if I understand. I feel like the kid that got the avocado for Christmas. He goes, avocado. Thanks. It's a good one. That's great. I kind of feel like that. It's a good one. I really appreciate it. Yeah, if you want to leave us a review, go to...
Leave us a review. If you're leaving us a review in one of those weird fucking countries like England or like France or Australia or like wherever, you're going to have to tell me when you do that because I'm not going to go look at all of those.
pages every week. I will look at the American one. Are you putting tariffs on your international listeners? I'm putting tariffs on our international listeners. You know what I've never looked at? I've never looked at Canada. Let's see if we have Canadian ones. We have no reviews from Canada. Fucking get your shit together. Oh, wait, wait, wait. Maybe I did the abbreviation wrong.
Wow. No, CA was right. And they, no one from Canada's left one. So that's on you. Wow. That's Canada. You're slacking. That's on you. All right. Let's get out of here. We've been doing this for a while. This has been a super total blast. Jess. My gosh, we were so happy to have you here. I'm so happy to be here. You know what I noticed? And I'm so proud of myself that I didn't jinx us.
Your internet issues completely went away. Yes, I have no idea what happened. I noticed also, and I was like, I'm not going to say shit. I'm so proud of us for collectively not. calling attention to it because it would have. broken it almost immediately. But we did make it. I think it was swapping us over to sending fewer pixels. I think it was as well. And now, because we're squished and weird...
Watchers on YouTube. I hope you really appreciated the angle you got. We can everybody switch back to. Okay, just to see. Hey, Jess, it already fucked up for you. It already fucked up. It already froze and you were like... Is it working? How's this? Are we good now? Is it working? Okay, hold on. My head looks weird now.
Is this the shape I am? Yeah, we're both that much wider. Isn't that weird? Nikki, I'm looking at you and I feel the same way. I feel like you're being nuts. You look like a Dick Tracy villain to me right now. Yeah, what's happening? It's so weird.
Anyway, Jess, what do you have to plug? Tell us what's going on with you. You can check out all my stuff over at GameSpot. I don't think that I have. I mean, I'm working on a little Overwatch 2. You know, I actually could have talked about that. That's not even embargoed. I've been playing some Overwatch.
2's new season that comes out next Tuesday but I'm in the early access server so look forward to something on Overwatch's next season and the stadium mode um i like i said there's no embargo so i'm allowed to say it's fucking rules and it's probably going to be the thing that gets me back into overwatch so hell yeah yeah amazing Wow, that's awesome. That's so cool. Nikki, do you have anything? I believe it. Nikki, do you have anything to plug?
Make You Think Dark Club is my newsletter. Perfect. Love it. Listen, January 5th, 2025, VGBs will be hosting a mixer in Los Angeles, California. Can I come? Yeah, we're going to be doing that. We'll release. yes of course of course you can yeah um you actually i was actually i was about to say because you just asked you're now legally obligated to come so you're obligated um the number of people who
are actually just obligated to come as pretty high. It is actually pretty high. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we are having a pre-SGF Mixer June 5th. That is the apparent release date of the Nintendo Switch 2. So you know what? Bring your Switch 2s. Because we'll have fucking screen pass. There will be so many people there ready to steal it right out of your fucking hands. They'll be ready to steal it because they'll be able to get a... Check it at the door. It'll be safe. It'll be totally safe.
But yeah, we'll be releasing more info about that. We're finalizing the menu. Yes, I'm buying food for you fuckers. Not drinks, though. Have the company pay for that. Nikki even fucking convinced me that we need to have more than one vegan option for food. Great. Sorry.
I'm not even, I don't even think those people should be allowed to vote. So like, stop it. No, we love our vegan friends. We will have very many options for you as well. So yeah, we're going to be having a party that night. It's going to be a blast. Please check out details over at VGBs.com or over at VGBs.com on Blue Sky.
bgps.com slash join is where you can join the hive. Please join the hive. We've had like five people join the past couple weeks. It's been great. We've been knocking it out of the park with podcast stats like March is our biggest month ever. April looks like it's going to be even bigger than that. So we're just on a really fun trajectory. Keep it going. If you don't keep it going, I'm going to disappear from your life.
So just that's a threat. Wow. We like to end on a threat here on the BGV's podcast. So without further ado, thank you for being here and keep on buzzing. Good night.