'Rise and Go': A Framework for Bold Leadership with Cory Carlson

With a successful 20 year background in corporate America , corey saw the need to address the challenges and brokenness that surround work-life balance . Moved by his experiences , he transitioned into executive coaching , dedicated to helping other leaders succeed , both professionally and personally . Known for his candid and invigorating discussions , you'll hear that today for sure .

Corey is equally passionate about empowering leaders through his books Win at Home First and the newly released Rise and Go , serving as inspirational guides amidst the highs and lows of leadership . At the end of the podcast , stay tuned for an exciting offer for all of our listeners to get a copy of one of Corey's books for free . Let's get started .

What's up , corey ? Corey Carlson , welcome to the Uncommon Leader Podcast . My friend , how are you doing ?

I always have my first-time guests answer this question first , and that's tell me a story from your childhood that still impacts who you are today , as a leader or as a person .

But my mom died of cancer when I was in high school and I was 15 years old when she passed away and which obviously that's awful and all those things . But there's a lot of cool things that came about out of it , but also some challenging things From the good standpoint of it .

My dad was an incredible model for me of how to win at home and win at work . I mean , that's kinda my big platform of , I believe , when leaders can win at work and win at home . Unfortunately , I've lost at both , but my dad modeled it really well At the standpoint . He had three kids , a wife that died of cancer and he had a demanding job .

But yet I still can remember John . I feel like he . I played sports throughout all high school . I still feel like he was at every game . I know he had to miss some games , but I just I don't have a memory of him missing games . I don't have a memory of thinking , oh man , I wish my dad would have been around more .

Somehow he was a salesman or sales manager for Chapstick , he did Heath candy bars and he even did Pop Rocks the can that fizzes in your mouth . Like all great companies had demanding territories , and one time even the whole country for Pop Rocks .

But I just say all that I say is he had success at work , but at home , even with a sick wife and then eventually a wife that passed I remember him being around , I remember him being at my games , I remember conversations . I don't know how he did it , and so for me that's a story that's definitely shaped me of who I am , and so that's the positive .

A negative out of that is it just felt like at times after my mom's passing and money going to chemotherapy and money .

And then there's a part of just my dad did actually have a little span of unemployment in between a couple of jobs , and so I started to adapt this head trash or this lie that hey , it's all on me , because the money went off to chemo , the money went off to other things , and so if I'm gonna do anything in my life , hey , it's on me .

And so for me that was hard , because at times it could be this unhealthy , striving for more because I've got to go do more things , and so that was a lie . But eventually , as I worked through it , as an adult I've learned more about how the church we grew up and stepped up to help us financially .

Others helped up , stepped up , and so really understanding , john , that I'm not just a provider , god's a provider , and a phrase that I've really helped to kind of adopt is that I control the input , god will control the impact , and so that's been helpful for me .

So just from that one story of having a mom that passed in high school , I got some great memories out of it , but then I had some negative that came out of it that have helped I still got to kind of work through to this day .

And we talked about a mutual connection in Ben Newman , who uses his burn with regards to his mother passing away at a very young age and how it drove him to do something different . And it is those positive and negatives that frame us going forward .

And I think you know , as you talked about your faith as well , in terms of you control , you control and God control the output . I love that in terms of hearing that and I can tell in reading your book Rise and Go , which we're gonna talk about a good bit today .

I know it's your second book because you also talked about when at Home First , which was your first book . You know those are things that you know , those are types of situations , prepare you those stories to write the book , and I love some of the stories inside the book . So bring us to today . Then we had some things we talked about in common .

We're both engineers , maybe different types . You're civil . I call you a concrete head . However , it works out . I got a couple of clients in concrete as well . I'm a mechanical engineer , but from civil engineer to national sales manager , to you know , executive coach around your own coaching company and a successful coaching company .

Tell me a little bit about that journey . You can say as much as you want to about it .

I designed airfield pavements and just I remember doing like spot elevations like every 20 feet with another elevation is like is this really what I'm going to be doing ? Great company , it was awesome . The bridge just wasn't for me . And I found a company that sold civil engineering products like bridges and storm sewer .

Guy recruited me to go there and I was like man , this would be awesome , technical , but also sales . So I did that in Kansas City , had success through the territory , got promoted , moved to Denver , colorado , managed a bunch of people in states and then I got promoted to Cincinnati , which is where we live .

When I got to Cincinnati I was VP of a hundred and 20 million dollar division and , john , I was a little bit in over my head . I was managing people older than me . I'd leapfrog my boss . I was now managing him and I was starting to have a little bit of a slip of .

I was skipping the gym , I was skipping quiet time and I just was like there's got to be a better way . I mean , I can't do this . And I kind of knew of executive coaches but didn't know exactly all what it was . I went to my boss and said I needed help and he said , hey , getting executive coach , I've always had one .

So I ended up hiring one and it changed my life . I know that sounds extreme , but one it's what I do for a living .

But also I just became a better father , a better husband , a better leader , because I realized it wasn't just about the eight to five or just about the P and L is able to zoom out and kind of look at my whole life and look at some different things .

I took one more corporate move where I was president of sales for a national contractor and I led almost like a coach . I was talking to him about the personal life and the professional life . Are they dating their spouses ? Are they being intentional with their kids ? Are they getting to the gym ?

But on the work side , are they blocking out time in their calendar to do business development or to do strategic thinking and kind of doing both . Because when I saw that they got better as parents and spouses , but also EBITDA improved our profitability of the company , I was like this is great , I'm going to do this for a living .

And so that began the I want to go do this for a living , which fast forward . I made the jump from corporate to doing this full time and now I coach one-on-one or in group settings or speak to companies and my , you know , it's just , it's really trying to help business leaders win at home and win at work .

Put the big rocks in first , however you go through and talk about that , but you know , the key being that you can do both , that you don't have to sacrifice one for the other , that if you prioritize properly and you prioritize your time properly , you can get both those things done . You have to be part of that .

You mentioned that in your , in your job on the sales side , you started to fall off on some of those disciplines , that discipline of taking care of yourself and that discipline of whether it was the exercise side or nutrition side .

How , how , how was that executive coach able to be successful with you to , and then when , and then after that , when did you know that you wanted to do that kind of thing ? So how , how did that coach get you to get back focused again and do your exercise every day and do your scripture reading every day ? What was it ?

So , whether I did an assessment of like a , say , a SWAT , or we do four strategic questions , or you know some of the pieces , but I'm sure I had an answer that says I feel kind of just like fat and sluggish , I need to get the gym , kind of thing .

I mean , I had some other items that I would have written , you know , written down , and I'm sure my coach did this . But this is like what I do with my clients as you do is like , all right , you feel sluggish , you need to get to the gym , let's get to the gym . What would make sense ? Can you , you know ? Can you do three times a week ?

Can you do five times ? What can you do ? You can do three , all right , Between now and the next time we talk , get to the gym three times a week , and so you just start to basically bring out whatever those kind of felt needs are that you've got to improve on as a coach and then you hold them accountable .

And so , for you know , you hit on the physical capital one on the gym , and so that would have been one to start . All right , I got to start getting the gym because when my biology is right then I show up better . If I've got energy to go through the whole day , I don't feel sluggish , I feel energized . That's good , you know .

On the spiritual one , where I know a big part , even you know back then with my coach , but even you know , present day , I mean , if I'm not spending time journaling , reflecting stillness , like I can just have this sense of wandering , I can have this anxiousness of the business , of a family , of just kind of everything .

And so for me , I like to make sure that I'm getting my quiet time and so I work a lot without all leaders . I mean , I had a client who actually was not a believer they're an atheist . However , I still worked with his name's , peter , and it's not , you know , confidential , because I actually include the story in my first book .

I went home first and it's just like but reflect , why did you lose your , why did you get frustrated in the board meeting the other day , why did you get you know , aggravated the way somebody said something to you . But for all of us just to reflect on the good , on the bad , why do we feel this way ? Why do we react this way ?

Man , it just helps us become better leaders , and so those are some of the things my coach was helping me with was basically zooming out , zooming out and then , along the way , just providing new perspectives , new content , new tool .

If you've been inspired by our conversation and are seeking a catalyst for change in your own life or within your team , I invite you to visit coachjohngallaghercom forward slash free call to sign up for a free coaching call with me .

It's an opportunity for us to connect , discuss your unique challenges and explore how coaching or consulting can benefit you and your team . Okay , let's get back to the show . Love that , the tools that keep you going and going forward . I got my first coach in 2003 .

I had a 10 year working relationship with that coach and still have a friendship with him today and it was life changing . I didn't know what it meant to have an executive coach before , but similar what you're talking about was after a performance review . For me , that was sub par . I no doubt about it and I made a choice I needed to get better .

I said I need help and we went down this executive coach path .

So I think you talked about the assessment side , when folks can make the choice that they want to get better , improving themselves on a regular basis , and realize that they'll invest their money somewhere , whether it's in their golf membership or whether it's in developing themselves inside executive coaching .

That it's relatively I don't wanna say inexpensive it's probably not the right word but a great investment in themselves to go forward and make that happen . You wrote rise and go and it's got on the front of the book and we don't do this via video . It's got on the front of the book a picture in the mountains , this guy climbing up a ladder .

Let's talk about the book first , like who did you write this book for and why ?

And I believe the book Rise and Go is a resource guide to help leaders get back up , and I know , in fact , it's become a resource guide for me . Now , who did I write the book for ? Well , to be completely honest , john , I wasn't writing a book . I was putting content together to help me get up .

And so March 1st 2020 , my family and I made a decision we're going all into this executive coaching , corporate speaking , we're leaving corporate America and the salary and equity and other people's paying for our insurance or just any of those things , and we're saying we're going all in .

And then on March 13th which was a Friday I'm not superstitious , but Friday the 13th is a little odd that that's shut down , especially , you know , the US and stay at home mandates and mask , and that day I got a couple emails that cancel speaking engagements .

And in that day , march 13th , I lost 35% of my revenue like that , and I know there's listeners who were impacted way worse than my family at losing the 35% that day . You know there were deaths and there was unemployment and all that , and I get it and sorry for that .

For us and our family , though , where I was in that moment , 35% not only sucked , but what about the other 65% ? What else is going to happen ? I mean , am I going to get more emails canceling ? And I have three kids , and at the time , my oldest was a sophomore in high school . What about college ? Is that going to happen ?

Or you know , we just got to do something different , and so what happened is so I get knocked down . I'm frustrated . I mentioned quiet time and I mentioned journaling . So I actually was journaling just my raw emotions , my raw feelings of like God , I'm frustrated , like I did my part of the deal .

My part of the deal was to leave corporate , be bold , step out of the boat , like go for it . You didn't hold up your end of the bargain , like here . I am kind of like sinking . This is awful . So I was frustrated . That's all like in my journals .

I was kind of just , you know , thinking this through , and I remember April 1st 2020 , I have circled in my journal . What am I supposed to do ? Just aggressively circled , I didn't know . Over the course of those coming weeks and coming months , I just got pointed at different content that helped me get up . One one is the actual word rise and go .

I , in the book of Acts , which is a book in the New Testament Acts 8 , 9 and 10 , three different individuals were told to rise and go . And so I'm reading this story and in each of these scenarios , each of these different three scenarios , they were challenging .

It was to get up and go , talk to royalty about something , and I just was like man if they were told to rise , I need to get out of my pity party and rise and go .

I heard stories of inspiration off podcast or just people I was bumping into and hearing cool stories of resilience , and so I was putting together this content kind of writing some blogs or writing some devotional thoughts , if you will to help me .

Well then , over that course of the year I ended up having about 60 different clients throughout that year and they would have a problem . They would have that they're frustrated or they're losing hope on something , or they're usually have a positive mindset , but now it's shifting into negative , kind of whatever it was .

I just was like , hey , I wrote this blog , read this , or I was kind of thinking about this wheel Cycle of Awesome or Cycle of Awful which I talk about in the book . Hey , why don't you take a look at this ? And so what happened is it got battle tested , they liked it , it helped them .

And I was like , ok , well , maybe this is a book and it'll help others . So I actually put it into a book to go help others . It's 20 chapters . The first 10 chapters give you the courage to get up , and then next 10 chapters give you the confidence to move forward .

So that became what the book was , and at the end of the book , I put together what's called a rise and go manifesto Obviously , rise and go because that's the name of the book so I thought I'd do something catchy Manifesto I'm not the one to create a manifesto . They've been around forever but I never really used one .

And so , starting 2020 , I started to have some different things in my manifesto that I would both proactively and reactively look at . John , proactively , I would . A couple of times a week I would look at this document . It has grown to be a 14 page Google Doc .

I do not look at all the words at all , but on there it's kind of got a vision board element to it . I got a bunch of I am statements to offset lies that I will hear in my mind and that head trash I've got .

I got a section there like God has a night shift , because so often we think it's all on us , but yet I got cool stories , that of success or encounters or meetups that I had nothing to do with , if I'm being honest . And so , anyway , I have that document .

So I proactively look at it a few times a week not all of it , I'll just skim through it and then reactively is if I get my teeth kicked in , if I lose a client or prospect or speaking engagement , or just those days you just feel down in the dumps .

I'll go look at that document and start to see truths of one either what God is telling me but , also just where I've had success in my life in the past , like they're all truths of a I had these many book sales , or I've had these are how many clients I've had , or other cool stories have happened and I start to read them like , all right , that's right .

That's right , let's go , I'm ready to get back in the game .

You put an action plan , which is pretty standard inside of a book to go forward in terms of you know the actions that you can take . You also have the QR codes in there that refer back to podcasts that you've done that have specific gifts to talk about that topic . How did you come up with that framework in terms of that ?

How did you think of putting it together like that , or was was there just something ? You're mind says I'm gonna do it differently , because you don't see many books that are written like that .

. I mean , there's other things I like . I like short chapters . I like short chapters that have some content and I want action out of them , Cause I'll read some chapters of a book and I'm like I don't know what to do with this , Like , how's this apply to me ? So you know , that's the reason for the , the chapters being somewhat short .

Tying into scripture is cause to me . That whole rise and go experience was a real spiritual experience , and so those were verses that meant something to me at the time and so that I want to include those for the reader . Some readers may not be as spiritual , some readers will be more spiritual , and so , but for me those verses meant something .

And then I include stories of my own life or of clients or podcast guests that's when you end up getting the QR code because during that time , like John , as I mentioned , I was , I was learning from others I mean , I always am learning from others but just some cool things that were happening and I was like man , and so I include that part into the podcast

and or into the book I was like hey , just give the . QR code if someone wants to go hear more , because there's some pretty cool things . And then at the end , I mean the reason I include that prayer is because after each of those chapters like that was my feeling as I was writing it like hey , god , I just have been struggling with lack of hope .

That's why I've put together some of this content in this chapter . Man , help me have hope for the future , help me believe , like what I'm saying here in writing . And so for me , I mean writing .

Well , both books are personal , but this book was really just a personal journey for me as I went from hitting bottom to then up into the right , which became kind of . You know , you even mentioned that graph of up into the right , and anytime we go up into the right , there's peaks . Well , actually I take that back .

Every time we go up into the right , people forget that there's peaks and valleys . They think it's a straight line , straight line , yeah . And so for me , you know , when I wrote the book , when I home first , I actually drew in the book a graph up into the right , hey , there's peaks and valleys .

And you probably have something very similar with your clients , john , that is , there's those days where clients are talking to us and they're just in a funk An employee quit , they missed their numbers for the quarter , or just something's happening . They're just in a low spot and it's almost doom and gloom .

It's always going to be bad and I'll draw out this graph and I'll circle one of those valleys that's there and say , hey , this is where you're at , but you haven't always been here and nor will you be here forever . You're in this low spot .

The devil's going to try to say that's how it always is and , like John , that's not only in business , but also even personally , like if you're , you know , for those listeners that are trying to get their marriage back , going in the right direction and you're making progress . Well , all of a sudden you have an argument .

You're like , oh man , it's over , it's over , it's always going to be bad now .

Or you're trying to work on your temper with your kids and you lose your temper because they won't brush their teeth or make their bed , or you know whatever it is to be on their age and you're like , oh man , I'll always be a bad parent because the devil , the head trash , wants us to think that we're always in that valley and so I will work with clients

and even myself of being like , hey , I'm in the valley , we've got to acknowledge that it's a funk . But man , look back how far you've come , how you've grown in your marriage or how in your parenting or in your business or in your leadership , look how far you've came .

And so I have them write out gratitude or things , they how they've grown in certain areas . But then I'll say but we're not done , we have places to go . So write out some of the dreams , rewrite what your vision is and it really did try to give some hope of what's to come .

Love that , so that became the rise and go kind of graph if you will , or image .

You know , as I listened through some of your about how you wrote it and you almost were like helping yourself as well . There's a quote that gets thrown around by Roy Abaden and it's pretty powerful . No pun intended , but you are the most powerfully positioned to help the person that you used to be .

And when you write that book , like if you were to follow some of your own guidance , would that have helped you get back up ? And it did , because you lived that story . So I appreciate you sharing it and I appreciate you sharing how the again prayer and the verse became important to you . Do you have a favorite client success story that you liked ?

There are many in your book and there are many that I liked and that I highlighted . I'm just curious if you had one that was kind of your favorite .

. You know we were talking about Went Home First at the beginning and there's a story actually in that book . It's really the root of the title Went Home First , because I didn't come up with that title on my own , like it wasn't like , oh , I'm gonna name the book Went Home First .

I got hired by this particular client who was a president of a company , and I got hired to help with culture , to help with vision and values , and at the time it was my largest engagement and I just was like , oh , this is awesome .

And so we have our first call , like it's official , we signed up and we're moving forward , and so we talk about some of the things we wanna do and the vision and values and those pieces . But just getting to know them more is like , hey , what did you do this past weekend ?

And he explained how him and his kids went to the farm or you know , they had some property and I was like and I just was kind of curious . I was like I asked a couple of the personal stories . I didn't hear anything about his wife . But I remember when we had the discovery call and we started kind of talking about working together .

He had mentioned that he'd been married for 25 years and so I just was like in my mind I'm like , oh boy , I'm asking about the personal life , I've yet to hear anything really about his wife and I , just to be honest , I just kind of had this , you know , prompting that I needed to ask the question about his wife and so I said , okay , you know you

mentioned your kids and going to the property . Tell me about your wife and what do you guys like to do for fun ? And you've been on any dates lately and it just kind of got , we kind of got quiet . His enthusiasm , you know , when he talked about work , his enthusiasm was super high . When I asked about family , it went down .

And when I asked about his wife . We went further down . I was like , oh my goodness , we got some challenges . So I could tell that home was just was not great . And so I just followed my prompting because I truly believe that , you know , if we're going to have success at work , we've got to have success at home . I mean , especially nowadays .

I mean I think it's always been the case , but now there is no . Leave your personal life at the front door . I mean , we're walking in , we've got our smartwatches on , we've got our smart phones . Matter of fact , some of us work from home and you just can't really break them apart .

So I asked I basically went for it with the client and I said , listen , I know you hired me to talk about vision and values . We're going to improve culture and some other items , but is it okay if we also talk about your personal life and your home life ? Because you have to win at home first in order for the changes at work to be sustainable ?

Is that okay ? And he gets quiet and I was like , oh my gosh , I just got fired from my biggest client yet . And he says , yeah , it's okay , because every day I drive home I get a pit in my stomach to walk in my front door . I said yeah , it's okay . Or he said yeah , it's okay . I said all right .

So over the course of some months we talked about the vision and values of the company , but we also talked about being intentional at home . And I challenged him go on a date . And the first date that he went on with his spouse after this drought , and I said it could not be very good . Well , the first date he got canceled on . She said no .

So I said you got to try again . So he went again and this time it was . They did go on a date , it was a little short . I was like you got to try again . And then they started dating again and his family improved . We also got the vision and values and everything else done with the company . We said we were going to do , but now we got both then .

And I remember one time where we'd both kind of been we missed each other for a couple of weeks .

We just weren't able to have really long connections out of some texts back and forth , when we got on one of those coaching calls after numerous weeks and he shared with me that they went on a date and just how powerful it was and that they held hands while they were walking and I was like , oh my goodness , like I've got a president of a company .

One of his greatest excitements is holding hands with his wife again . So wherever that listener is , no matter where they're at , what I always want to remind , I got to remind myself , but to remind listeners or just the audience , of wherever you're at , you don't have to stay there .

So if the marriage is not where it's at your parenting , your working out your business culture , your purpose , you feel burned out . You don't have to stay there . With some intentionality we can improve all areas of our life . It just takes intentionality .

So if you go to queryoncarlsoncom , forward slash free book , you go there , you pick Went Home First . That's the first book where we talk obviously about home , how to put together a personal vision statement , a key framework called the Five Capitals , or the second book , which is Rise and Go , which we were unpacking already .

So pick a book , our team will mail it to you . And , as they hate , thanks for listening this long in the podcast . That's awesome .

I may go do that myself for Went Home First and see how that goes to read that one too . Corey , I wanna thank you first for your time to invest with our listeners . I think we could carry on this conversation for another couple of hours . It just kind of goes pretty well , but I wanna honor your time .

But the same question for my first-time listeners , and I've had three-time guests too . So if you wanna come back , we're going for the five-timers , are gonna get the robe , the Uncommon Leader Podcast robe . We're gonna see who gets it first .

What are you gonna put on the billboard and why would you put that message on there ?

But something I learned years ago is by knowing that we are beloved sons or beloved daughters , we can then work from a place of approval as opposed to for approval , because when we're working for approval , we're always striving , we're always trying to scratch and claw and position ourselves because if I get that for approval from my spouse or from my kids or from

my job or whatever it is , then I will have arrived and that's just . It's fleeting , that's all there is to it . It's fleeting .

But , however , if we can know that we are loved and we are beloved sons or daughters , then we operate from that place of approval and from there and we can forget ourselves and therefore show up as our whole selves to love , to serve and to just give ourselves to others .

You can do that on Apple Podcasts or you can rate the podcast on Spotify or any other platform you listen . Did you know that many of the things that I discussed on the Uncommon Leader podcast are subjects that I coach other leaders and organizations on ?

If you would be interested in having me discuss one-on-one or group coaching with you , or know someone who is looking to move from underperforming to uncommon in their business or life , I would love to chat with you . Click the link in the show notes to set up a free call to discuss how coaching might benefit you and your team .

Until next time , go and grow champions .