Ted Lasso | S3 Ep12 Part1 "So Long, Farewell"

So , like there's nothing about this that I didn't want to do , it is only that I can only take care of plants and having any sort of responsibility on me . For the 10 days that it was , I didn't realize until the very end that I was like , oh shit , I am drained , like I need , I need a break . I had to watch cats for 10 days .

I had to be there to make sure they were fed and here comes the ambulance . And then this weekend I spent time with four children and I was responsible for them also .

And then tonight I got home , or last night I got home and I was like , oh shit , I have a friend coming to spend the night on Wednesday and I need to clean my entire apartment and there were so many things that I was like I don't know how actual people exist , because I just sit in my filthy small apartment by myself , not talking to anybody and watering

plants once a week and that's the only thing I have to do in my life , like sometimes I do my job , I guess , but I do that so well that it doesn't matter .

Anyway , I'm bringing all this up because being able to talk to the two of you where I don't have to do any preparation and I don't have to think at all , I just need to spout whatever bullshit comes out the top of my head , is such a welcome relief from having to remember oh wow , keep yourself alive , because two living things are depending on you right now

, and then you have to go entertain children . So you guys are a welcome break from being a responsible adult for me . Also , my place smells like disinfectant right now , so hard that I think I need to open all the windows . I don't , I'm doing it wrong , I'm being an adult , so hard rock .

I want people to get an insight into the , the unicorn that is boss . That's awesome , just a picture of loveliness and I love that . I love that you're . You're like oh , why would anyone like ? How could people like four children ? Why would you ever do that ? Why , how could you manage that ?

Then you can't sit in your dirty apartment by yourself and eat edibles and watch whatever you want to watch . And yeah , there is a thing , there is a dynamic where and I don't know if they , I think they do a very bad job in this world . And this is just me .

This is just me one man's opinion of preparing people like okay , you'll go to a home economics class and that's like a , that's like a . Okay , you know , sometimes they'll say , okay , here's a good checkbook .

Okay , I understand those sorts of things , but there's the , there are these elements of what your , what , these life milestones that we have that were not , that were prepared in the sort of a wrong ? I'll give an example . I'm not , I'm not saying this properly .

A lot of people , a lot of a lot of women , specifically , but girls , are raised to look forward to their wedding , right the big day where they're celebrated , right as the one day where everybody comes up and celebrates you . And so many girls , many young girls , and many is boys too . I was the same way .

I was really excited for my wedding day , and so so many people are hyper prepared for the wedding they really are and completely unprepared for the marriage . Coaches , coaches just is like his chin is going 11 miles up and down .

And the first rule of like mistake of entrepreneurs is thinking of yourself as an entrepreneur Other than they were like this is rule one . It was like Fight Club , like , uh-huh , like , because you don't know what that means . I promise you , like you know , everyone's like I'm an entrepreneur , I'm wild and free and they don't realize .

Realize it means like literally indenturing yourself to slavery of a kind , and you know , of your , of your own making . Yes , I , I , who was talking ? The other day I heard this great thing . Oh God , who was it ? Guys , it was somebody talking and they were saying you have to . Someone's asking them do you have to love what you do to make it ?

And they're like no , you don't have to love , love it , you have to be obsessed with it . It's a different thing . Like love is like nurturing Love is like like we're trying to build with this podcast and this community . It has to be upset If it's just love , love , this and all was love can sometimes be unrequited . You know it has to be an obsession .

You have to say like this is important and I'm in for the long haul . My name is Coach Castleton . By the way , with me , as always , is Coach Bishop Howdy , neighbor . Oh God , okay , good . And then and then with us is our boss , emily Chambers .

Not being together doesn't make any sense to me , and we might touch on that the levels to which , when you have two straight white people of opposite genders , tv shows immediately assume they should probably be banging .

Oh God , I read something . Oh , my God , my brain is mush today because I keep thinking of all these great things . I'm hearing , like I heard somebody specifically talking about the or I read , or I read it somewhere , about Ted and Rebecca , and why . Oh , maybe it was one . Actually , maybe it was an email from a buttercup . I have to look at that .

But the concept was why is romantic love the the peak of the mountain , rather than like absolute , like divine human connection and like in certain cases , yes , you might add physicality to the mix , but like it's not necessary to have , like , like you know , you think about the relationships in your own life where you just have someone that's utterly irreplaceable and

it could be apparent , it could be a you know , it doesn't always have to be you know , like it could be a best friend , it could be someone from your childhood , it could be .

You know , sometimes you have these people and then , and then they go out of your life and you live , you know , for a long period of time without that person and then that whole becomes something in your that , because that's its own identity , of the missing piece that you could not replace .

So it's interesting when we look at Ted and Rebecca and we're going to start there . We are exploring Ted Lasso , season three , episode 12 . We are finally here . So long farewell . It has been a long time for us to get here many years of work and we're so excited to finally be here with with all of our listening community and with all of our buttercups .

This episode is written by Brendan Hunt and Joe Kelly and Jason Suneikis and directed by Declan Lone . It's funny thinking about the things in your life that can make you cry just knowing that they existed . Coach .

I'm glad you started us there because I found now that I braced myself for the finale when it , you know , was happening in the flow of the show , you know through Apple TV , and then I've braced myself for this us sort of talking about it and all the things that you know have gone into this conversation . I mean , boston is hard to for me to process .

We did not know each other when this began . We're like , oh hi , we're going to talk about Ted Lasso , which is just unfathomable to me . But even in my rewatch to prepare for this , I found myself bracing and about 10 to 15 minutes left in the episode , finding a long list of things that I absolutely had to do right now .

It was like I just I couldn't get to the end in a in a straight line . I had to sort of force myself to , you know , be a grown up and watch the rest of the episode so that we could talk about it . But yeah , this has been a special place and phase and part of my life and has impacted me far beyond .

Oh , that was a cool story or that show was hilarious or any of that . I feel like I've had a personal relationship with the end that has impacted my personal growth , which is not something I know I can say about many . Certainly , if any shows like , I feel it has impacted who I am after having gone through this time with it .

I've got a buddy and I was like , well , if he's friends with you he can't be great . But yes , I will be happy to .

I just thought I'd go ahead and use up some of your data , so take care now , what the hell's going on here , yeah , no , it's part of it's total podcasting coach and you know we're going to start with , we're going to start .

It was like it's a series of tiny , you know , micro , trans , micro transaction . What do you say ?

A series of tiny in a micro interactions , interactions that lead to this , this whole practical inevitability , and it's going to work and that that is a huge draw of the show and it's a huge draw of this podcast , which is which is modeled after the tiny steps you take , and hopefully we're going to continue to be analytical about this and sort of try to , as

we finish up here , see how how the finale , how it landed for each one of us I know it was different for all of us Coach has a tremendous amount of love and praise and joy . I know this is a pure nostalgia piece for me at this point , which is interesting because it wasn't that long ago that it ended .

But when I started doing the rewatch to analyze this episode , I just was overwhelmed with like gratitude and joy and thankfulness and and I and a lot of the my inner critic sort of washed away because it was like , oh , like this was a beautiful thing that we , that we all had together . It brought all of us , our listener community , here .

It brought the three of us together for this podcast . It brought us the Butter Cups . We've just launched our Buttercup community and it is full of wonderful , wonderful people and it's such a thrill to just be . I've had the luck of interacting with all of these people , mostly via email , but it is so rewarding to see that out of this show .

It's a show , it's just a show . Some , some randos , made a show that ended up having people like just be completely , you know , completely reevaluate their outlook on things and and , in some ways , feel validated by how they viewed the world .

I know like that's what brought coach and I in from the start was seeing the male avatar , that , or a series of male avatars who were trying to do what we were trying to do . It's like okay , finally , like somebody is putting this on television unabashedly , without like snark , to be like oh yeah , sorry , I'm a little bit of a wuss .

Like you don't have to qualify , you should be like no , I . I believe in these things and I'm cool that I don't have to have the strongest handshake . I don't have to . I can pretend with my best friends . I can be vulnerable with other men . I can be honest about mistakes I made .

I can take responsibility for my actions and be held accountable and hold myself accountable to become a better person in the in an effort to grow and get better , right , coach ?

I was glad she saw that and shared that as soon as she did and you were able to share it with the rest of us , because it helped me to sort of really lean into why I was enjoying it the way I was , not just as much as I was , not just as much as I was .

And I feel like there's so much around like , oh , we should be good to each other at work , but that's not the way the world really works . And there are times where that is absolutely the way the world really works .

I'm not saying it's the only way it works or it always works that way , but there was something like you said , something refreshing and I found it inspiring to saying but we could make it work more that way , and we could make it work that way sometimes if we committed to it , and here I come , the dark cloud . That's fine .

She's the most wonderful lady and her ringtone is the Imperial March . So it's for all kinds and , yes , you should play it now . I think that you guys are right . I do think that you're right .

I think that there are plenty of ways in which the last couple of seasons maybe didn't work quite as well for me as the first one did , and that the ending , as much as it was wrapped up and I understand it was excellent from a production standpoint it didn't hit exactly the right points for me . I think you guys it was .

This was a show built more for you because it says we , the world , could be lighter , and what I really loved about the first season was it saying the world can be dark , and that doesn't mean that it's bad , and so I think that all three of us got different things out of it .

I like that they said you could still be happy and joyful and kind even in dark times , and I think that they went more towards the . This is how we continue to make it lighter and that didn't always connect with me the same way I did with you guys , but I understand that . That is not for me . That is a different vein .

So you have like your fantasy existence or your fantasy fantasy experience where you're , you know , watching these , these shows , and then the gaming term is IRL , which is in real life , and you go like I have this IRL experience . I was so , like I said , we have this buttercup site .

It's a community , community site with all of our buttercups , and I shared the other day that I had this moment where I actually in my and I do this regularly I say like oh , what would Ted do in this moment ? There was this thing I called coach about it .

I was so called both of you , but of course , boss , I think she has me blocked , coach , I'm not really sure . I thank you at least for answering coach , but boss , no , am I blocked , like actively , or ?

And I have this salt of the earth wonderful mechanic named Chris and he's got the like a super super , had co-op Boston accent Like this guy is like full on what you think , except he's not the dirt bag that you think of when you know a lot of people say , oh , but there's these really really like hearty wonderful .

All this guy lives for is to fix everybody's car and give him a discount because he gets pissed off at what other people charge . So people come in and be like Chris . I got a quote for like 685 for me to do like this one rotor or something . He's like he'll get physically angry . What are you serious when you want me to call him ?

You know , you know much . That pack costs that much . That pack costs $35 . Okay , you're telling me he's doing $600 with the labor . You know like like that's how he'll get crazy , but but in the best way , because he wants to protect people . He's a , he's a good egg .

So I dropped my car off there and I've known him for a few years not like a long time , you know . I would say maybe a few , a few years . But I get this call the car's ready . And he says , oh , oh God , guy , kaz ready , you can pick it up .

But like I really need a favor from you , guy , and I said , boss , you're hearing this for the first time , right ? Yeah , boss is smiling , she hasn't heard this , yet I didn't have this yet . Because I need a favor . I'm just like , literally during the day , pick up the phone , this is any of your favorite .

He says my daughter's here and she can't find her keys . Like she has a car there and she pulled in and her keys are . They cannot find her keys . They're like in the shop somewhere and she's freaking out . She's got to go do some stuff . And then so he says Is there any way like she can borrow your car ?

And I was so moved Because this is not , this is atypical , right . This is not a thing . You bring your car for service and they want to use it . Like that's not the thing . But I'm like this is so atypical that I felt honored to be asked . I was like , great , yes , like , of course , right .

And then , as he's hanging out , there's other guy , colin , that he works with , and I hear hang up and he gets a call and I told you , I see , I fucking love that guy , like . And I hear him hang up about me . I'm like , yeah , that's , I'm , this is all . This is total , total , automotive , automotive thing , or when a total , total car .

And so I'm like , great , yeah , have your daughter , whatever . I don't , you know , I don't know what the thing is . But he says it'll be done by five . And it's funny because I know he's got ADHD .

He doesn't know he's got ADHD , but I know , just talking to him like he's all over , you know , I don't know how he gets anything done , especially I should share the pictures of it . Oh , that's what I'm going to do and the in the buttercup site . I'm going to share the pictures of his .

I went around when I first kind of got to know the guy because , unlike other garages , they he'll let you just walk , like you know , like everyone's worried about insurance . No , he's just like he's got under a car , he's got it up , you know he's kind of muttering to himself and there's nobody in the office .

So like if you want to talk to him about your car , you're like you go and he wants you to walk in and just kind of sit next to him . So you're in the garage and I was like this is fascinating , right , yeah . And so I went around and took pictures .

I think I shared some with our friend group there , coach , but it's just amazing and I'm like how does this guy find anything ? But he says , oh , I'll call you , I'll call you when she's back , I'll call you at some between you know , between five and six . Of course I don't get a call , so because I know like he's going to forget .

So I just go there , like 545 ish and and Colin is there and says thank you , thank you , and charges me less for the for you know than what , what they quoted me and I go , and I was just so proud of all this and I go to get in the car and it just reeks of cigarette smoke and I went through this , like this swoosh of emotions where I was like the

first thing was anger because we talk about how coach and I are programmed that way . We're just like like , are you fucking ? Like , are you serious ? Right , like happening right now , like we don't know what happened here . We know what happened here is I'm the best person in the world and this is how you fucking think .

And then I'm like , oh , that's a terrible , terrible thing , right . And then right , it's terrible . And then it's like this is like a real , like what would Ted do ? Kind of moment , because I'm like , oh , this is going to hurt my relationship with Chris . Now I'm gonna have to be like , hey , man , you know , like your car stunk , whatever the whole thing .

I was like this is going to be whatever . And then , in thinking about Ted Lasso and thinking about I was also had shame . I don't want to skip over that . Because I was .

I felt my second thing after rage was shame , because I thought , yeah , of course , this is why they are boundaries , this is and I knew I was going to say that , yeah , there we go Now boss is the one nodding yes , yep .

Yep , and I was like , of course , they , they , they asked me because I'm the one boob that would , would allow this , and you know , get kicked while you know , while they and you know , whatever . Like you know , thank you , sir , may I have another kind of thing ? And so , anyway , then I went past that and I said like what would Ted do ?

And I just was like , all right , I'm gonna , I'm gonna , I'm gonna make lemonade out of lemons . And I drove home , like there's another way to get to my house from this place . That takes the highway .

I opened up all the windows , I put out some music and then I aired it out and then by the time I went to , they basically just drove with the windows open the rest of the day , and the next morning I went to take my kids to school . I couldn't smell anything . So , you know , no harm , no foul , but it's a thing where you go . All right , I'm

. I am including the ethos of this television show into my daily existence and I just don't know how many shows are able to have that sort of impact on people .

You might even understand the characters code , but this show brought to the surface like there's a way we're going to do things . The way I see it . We're a team , teams got a bond right , like whatever the moment , in that moment it's very clear that we're not just sort of , in some vague way , exploring interaction .

It's like no , no , no , no , no , there's a way to do this best . Whether we all agree that that's best is a different conversation . But the show definitely has an attitude that like there's a way to do this , that's best .

And if it means this feels it's not one to one , but it feels like it has a relationship to having Jamie come back to Richmond and where it's like I'm going to make a lot of fucking trouble for myself , right , but you know what ?

He didn't have A good dad , and I need to , you know , lend him the metaphorical car to , to , to , to sort of see if I can help him out .

I actually got a lovely message from Lauren this morning listener Buttercup , I believe saying that she read David Rakoff's last book because I had mentioned that in the previous . Oh yeah , right , and so she and I were just messaging and I'm thrilled about that , very happy , more people who read him better for me , because I love them .

But somebody else not a Buttercup or anybody related to this show , just somebody I follow said essentially always try to be nice to people , because you're never sure if they've just had to put down their cat that they've had for 20 years and they're having a bad weekend referring to herself because she had to , unfortunately , put down her cat and she needed some

tenderness .

What I'm saying is that being endlessly kind to other people is being cruel to yourself , and so a boundary is usually not about I'm going to say no because I don't feel like it , even though I do that all the fucking time . I'm like no , I don't want to do that thing , I'm not going to go to it , it's more so .

You know , like what you actually did was decide yes , I'm going to let his daughter use the car , that's no problem . And then a problem came up because of that , and you decided how much is this a problem ? How do I need to address it ? What can I do to solve it in other ways ?

How much can I extend myself in order to resolve this without bringing in other people ? And maybe , what are you going to do in the future , Like , if his daughter needs to borrow your car again for some reason , are you going to say yes without thinking about it twice ?

Or are you going to say oh yeah , sure , but just you know , like , try not to smoke , blah , blah , blah . I don't want to make an issue , but if you could do this for me , how was this best handled ?

So I think that there is a big difference between saying of course you could use my car anytime you want to , and if you want , your dog could shit in the backseat and that's no problem , don't worry about cleaning it up , you don't have to do that , I'll take like there are methods in which you could deal with all these things where you're still being kind .

You just aren't being cruel to yourself about it .

There's a very heartfelt scene that we'll go through in detail , where Rebecca , I think , in some ways makes some really strong arguments for , hey , just because you want to be with your family doesn't mean you can't be here . But Ted knows what he needs to do for his family and specifically his son and for himself .

And he does that , and he's clear about it , and he's resolute , even if it means it's going to make Rebecca cry , which he doesn't want to be doing .

I think saying I have to go back to Kansas , I can't stay here , to Rebecca . I think that there are different instances of him doing that .

I just don't know if the message from the show is you can do things in this way , or if the message of the show is always extend yourself as much as you can and then frame it as Ted extending himself to Jamie , to Nate , to his family , instead of other people Like . I think the overall point is still do everything you can for other people .

It just is identifying which different people to do it for .

You know one of these soccer shows , you know the Premier League round up , and so we get this sort of you know it's supposed to be like an overview and and and of course you know Gary says it's a rare treat when the Premier League title comes down to the last match of the season and Terry , as the Greyhounds win on Sunday and Manchester City loses and or

draws , fc Richmond will actually win the league . Ok , because they need to set up the exposition . But it's like , like I would say I've made this point before where the exposition season one was so good because they had 41 years to write it . And listen , we got to .

We got to just be honest about when you make a show , you make a hit show that you don't think will ever see the light of day , and then it does . You're like , oh my God , you've been sculpting the language for literally . It was eight years that they , that it took them to get this where it was .

And then everybody wants you to come back and make miracles with you know . A six month hiatus for season two it , like what they did despite any criticism , is astounding . And then to do it again in season

three . Whatever you might think of the trajectory of quality , you , they're , they're hamstrung , no matter what . They're fighting against time and money . And what are the ? What do they say ?

You know , we've been on a , we've been on a path here like the fact that we're at the final episode and that might actually happen . That's a story book ending . That's a . They were really yes .

And Gary says , hey , so did you , which , as we remember , there wasn't a lot of hope for this for this squad . And this is pre Zava days , boss . This is like I don't remember what happened before Zava .

Just I don't understand why they showed us these important things before they happen , why they showed us these things before , explained to us why they are important in that they were building to something bigger . I actually was listening to a podcast yesterday . It's love it or leave it . John Love it , who used to be a speech writer for president Obama .

God , I love him . Yes , he was talking to Jen Psaki , the former press secretary , and saying she was saying anybody who tells you right now that there is an important speech , that this speech is what's going to make the election a year from now , is out of their goddamn mind .

Because after Obama got the nomination in 2008 , people said , oh , what's this speech ? Or it's this , or it's him doing this . And six weeks before the election , there was a huge financial collapse and that's what won him the election is that we were like oh well , we need a .

Democrat in charge , because shit is getting wild on the financial front and Republicans can't be trusted with that . So there is a part of me that thinks right now Zava was whatever speech it is that's happening right now in the American political system that we don't understand why it is important or why it's irrelevant .

But they knew back then was they had a team that got relegated two years ago and got promoted but still is at the bottom . So I do understand it . I didn't understand it at the time . It makes more sense now , at least .

It made me think of Howard Dean going in 2004 and that somehow made one sound made him instantly not presidential to the electorate . You know you would talk about how . You know pivotal one thing and now you look at today's political climate .

The last time I should have played was 10 , though . Things got ugly . You guys remember that . What happened at half time of that match ? Boss , to make things ugly refreshing , that's when .

make might make us feel both feel better . So , yeah , they came out , west Ham , things got ugly . That wasn't a football . That wasn't football , it was a crime scene . Speaking of which ? Okay , speaking of which boss ? What are we speaking of ? We know what happened at the very end of Coach .

Refresh everyone's memory about who showed up at Rebecca's door at the very end of the last episode , please .

I just I , yeah , I really appreciated that moment . I thought that was a great choice to show me .

I'm gonna talk about women and what they , what they need . Yeah , just a little . Yes , sir .

Okay , no , boss , talk about how we've , we've , we've actually talked about how , when you get into , I'm just , I'm gonna , I'm gonna tee you up that sometimes when you go to a company as a woman , the first person that'll undercut you at the company is another woman and you go .

Wait what the hell , like and like , hopefully , this little tiny , you know microcosm of the various bexes and cakes is . You know , it's an indicator of , of , of a , you know paradigm shift that women don't always have to play into the patriarchy and play by rules that don't favor them in any way .

One of the things that I talked about years ago is after it came out that Matt Lauer was a sex pest and had the automatically closing and locking door in his office and had had it done all kinds of horrible things that we don't need to get into here . But right when that news broke , I'd remember that he had done an interview .

I , I maybe I don't want to say I bury my head , but sometimes it gets so dark I go oh God , like I don't want to know that , seep in .

That definitely was Matt Lauer that they were alluding to , that he had the door and this is the .

But I remember at the time when the stuff about Matt Lauer came out , he had , just a little bit before then , done this interview with Hillary Clinton while she was running for president , where he had been applauded essentially for holding her feet to the fire and asking her the tough questions and making sure that they weren't just going to give her a pass to

the presidency , that even if she was running against somebody's ludicrous as Donald Trump , they were going to make sure that they vetted her because she needed to earn the presidency . And I remember thinking afterwards like she was being interviewed by a man who treats women like objects and we applauded him for treating her poorly .

This is how we grade women in this society that , even though you will have a sex past who was accused , I believe , fairly credibly , of actual rape charges , you have that dude . You have that dude being the one who is responsible for deciding if a woman is good enough to be president . It's like what in the absolute fuck ?

So , given all of that , there are times where even the biggest feminists will fall prey to patriarchal issues and will do cutthroat things to each other . We are not bigger than the system that we live in , and we shouldn't have to hold women to a higher standard than we hold anybody else to .

There's actually a scene on Mythic Quest which , if you obviously have Apple TV , please watch it . It's amazing where a woman talks about how , as a game developer , there are only so many spots for women .

So women in tech hate each other because they are your biggest competition , and she's saying this to a group of young girls who want to become women in tech . Yes , it's hilarious .

I would like also to mention that part of that was Rebecca extending courtesy and kindness and being polite to Becks and also watching out for Becks .

I don't know if Becks I don't think there's any way for Becks to know that Rebecca called Rupert out for that but Rebecca was putting that out there and getting back from Becks that she could be a trusted source .

It's not just it's not right or you , dirty dog , they deserve better . She really was looking out for Becks , kind of purely . Yeah , I think that's cool . You're right that Rebecca opened the door to a new way of being and it's not basically like fuck that young bitch and her baby . You know what I mean . It wasn't that at all .

So the new partner then is indoctrinated to hate the old partner , even though the old partner was wrong .

They have different relationships with sort of , I would say , marital transgressions or , in some places where it's actively fine to have a mistress or a suitor , a man who's outside of the relationship . Whatever I think , in this country at least , we tend to be very sort of old fashioned about cheating , the concept of cheating , and we have never .

At least the show Ted Lasso doesn't . In one way it's very honest about how Rebecca got into it with Rupert . She talks about it . She was a bartender , she says he was married and then she had it in six weeks . He had her eating out of his hand . You know that's just what he does . It makes her feel like the most important person in the world .

Everybody remember this , nods are hard to hear , but yeah , thanks , boss . Thank you Appreciate that . Okay , good Now . By the same token , it didn't cast her position in a negative somehow . It was like she said it without the specter of shame about it .

We didn't ever address the fact that another woman , pre-rebecca , was injured , right , or was sort of somehow , I don't know , I don't want to say the word is not the right word but she was a hard-witting .

It's a semantics thing and I have a whole rant on people say semantics because I'm like , yeah , it's called language . So yeah , I just have to say things . What the hell . But I think it's important that actually Cakes didn't cheat on Bex . Rupert cheated on Bex with Cakes and I think sometimes when we talk about it , it's a transgression .

It becomes a beef between the , let's say , the mistress and the person in the present relationship , whether it's this other man and the guy in the relationship and it's like but they never promised you anything . There's a decent chance . They don't even know you . They never promised you anything . The person you're in the relationship promised you something .

They're the person who did the betraying . They're the person who did the cheating .

She's hilarious , she's incredible .

Like I remember , like , and now now , like I did and we didn't know at the time about Matt Lauer , that was later , right . So now I'm like processing like we we let like a sexual predator , like interview , Like .

.

He says it weird , right .

I want to throw it to you , since I'm guessing you spent a lot of time looking at this in a particular sense .

But in addition to it being a great callback to beard after hours from the second season , I think that there's also something about how quickly the media will change on a person , a woman in particular .

One of my least favorite examples is how Britney Spears was the hottest thing in pop music for a number of years and then crazy and horrible bitch who cheated on Justin Timberlake . And then crazy again , and then back . And then , oh , now she . Everybody wants to free Britney because of her conservatorship .

And now , just a couple of years after that , we are back to the point where we're like , oh well , should we put her back under the conservatorship ? Like , are we sure that she ? We can't make up our minds about women in the press ever , and so I do like that .

They were showing Rebecca being pissed off that I'm sure a couple of years ago all these shows were saying well , rupert Manion having his team stolen by that bitch of an ex-wife just because he cheated on her with every person they've ever met . And now they're back to oh , they were such a great couple .

Can you imagine if you had something and then , just because you treated somebody really poorly and they went to court and were able to battle enough that they got it from you ? They could just take it . Yeah , Come on , the world is nuts , she was a bartender before he made her .

I did that specifically because I was seeing the little mermaid ballet that night and I thought that that would be ironic and mean for me to eat a lot of fish and then go watch about a mermaid . That's so funny .

So whatever bartending she was doing , this was not a . This is her career . This is her coming out . This was more like a probably just got out of a fancy private school where she and Sassy were friends and now she is taking a bartending job before she starts at an executive office someplace .

I don't know what the heck that is , but it's great . She's got a version of this here where she's got a mug of coffee and she's kind of chewing . I just like what people are themselves Like . You know what I mean . If , whenever you show me someone say , oh , look at this , like knockout this .

Whatever celebrity or athlete or somebody that I think is great , I envision that they're necessarily always like them in a t-shirt or something more than I like them dressed up to the mind .

I don't know what that is , but this version of Rebecca it almost feels like a glimpse into , like you're peeking I don't know you're peeking into her private life or something and she's obviously stunning just hanging out first thing in the morning .

And so we have this moment of calm , just her calmly sitting alone or so we think in her kitchen , and then Coach walk us through what happens next .

morning . Morning , ted Hi . Kind of awkward saunter chuckle moment . She's gazing up over her cup . I will say that in real time . I did wonder oh , did these two do the like ? I'm going to miss you , I'm going to miss you fell into each other's arms . Oh boy , that just happened at this moment . So I was definitely going . Oh boy .

You know what I mean Because this sort of disheveled appearance is not typically something we see from them . And then when Ted says you want to talk about it , rebecca says I'm not ready to talk about it yet and he says OK , and so , yes , you would not be wrong to think something may have happened with them . And then boss what happens .

Where I was employed as my full-time job , there were , like some catering supervisors way back in college days that I'd go out and get shit-faced with . But as a professional adult Like party done . Yeah , as a professional adult I have never been close enough with a boss that I would say is it OK if I crash at your place because of whatever ?

But I cannot possibly fathom Beard , with his relationship with Rebecca , saying is it OK if I come spend the night at your house and bring my girlfriend Bitch ? Beard , you are a professional , Go get a hotel room . You and your girlfriend live together and you could split the cost . There is no reason for you to be in Rebecca's kitchen right now .

Absolutely not .

I wish somebody had said like Beard , brendan , beard is a character and not a caricature , and I think I mentioned this in the rapid reaction that we get to a point where it's like especially we haven't gotten to talk about it yet , but Beard after hours .

his relationship with Jane was character defining for me , like I think that it legitimized a lot of his viewpoints and made him a more deeply drawn character . And so now , having that like fucking beard you're , why are you wearing that thong in front of your boss , not just in front of Ted , but why are you doing that in front of Rebecca , like ?

I know that this is supposed to be funny , but it makes it so that it's . He is less of a person , more of a fool or a jester , and I would prefer to keep him as a person .

But essentially I think of beard as being a weirdo loner and I know people like that in real life and I don't not identify with people like that in real life , like I've definitely had moments where I'm like , well , nobody understands me , and so having somebody that is a fully formed character , that is expressing that sort of feeling distant , distant from all of

humanity , and feeling like people don't understand you , like your bed and deers from community or your Sherlock Holmes is like these kinds of characters that don't feel like they fit in . And then having him become a fully fleshed out person on the show but that made me like him more .

I was already attracted to him this makes me feel like they are reversing a lot of that and turning him back into just a guy who was around to say things to Ted .

Correct me if I'm wrong , because beard after hours is episode nine of season two , and then is it eight or nine ? No , I think it's nine . And then yeah , and then you were kind of okay with beard throughout season three .

You hadn't like his caricature status was not something I remember you commenting or remarking about , and until it was like sort of like when he was like we had a nine shot and Friday thing , but then he was ready to throw axes at Nate and I don't remember you I think you were like okay , like you didn't harp on it .

Then it was really the backup tickers heroin , john Valjean thing , that kind of set you the wrong way . And then this emphasized that . I know there's a beat with Roy where he does something where I go like huh , like just leave him alone , and I'm like why ? Why , we didn't need this , we were good . And so I don't think coach has a similar thing to coach .

Did you ever get to a point where there's one character like they wouldn't do that ?

Sure , but I do think sometimes you can go for the joke and lose some other things and I and I think boss is on target that even if , like , let's say for a second that they that Ted said well , you know , beard is , you know , stuck to .

All right , we're all heading over and let's just accept that that could happen and let's accept that these two got carried away last night , I do find it hard to believe that he would go down to the kitchen for his morning coffee all relaxed in a thong , that is . I mean you know , throw on your pants , you're somebody , I mean it is .

It probably does cross the line into you know , caricatures you described which I thought was on target .

He was so comfortable that if we take this as canon which we have to because it is then we have to say , well , he's a vibrate on a nice damn kind of a guy , right , I mean the crazy of his mother which has been established , and then you understand people better .

all gotten carried away from time to time and done something a little bit wild , but I am now a 42 year old woman , so I haven't done anything this wild since at least 2019 . Like , let's get real , I'm fucking grown up . I've been on this for like a month .

Thank you , but I just it feels like I think , actually , what bothers me about it the most is does Beard have such a full understanding of Ted and Rebecca that he would know that they would not be upset by this and therefore this is all okay ?

Or is Beard again being obtuse to what's happening around him , which is that Ted and Rebecca are both thinking like the fuck , are you down here in a red thong ? Is this again him not understanding that his friends think Jane is a fucking crazy person and he needs to flee from her ?

Or is this Beard being so tapped in that he knows that they won't mind , and I don't know if they ever established which one that it's this is ? They play it for laughs , which makes me believe that they are going with . He doesn't know or doesn't care . It is ignorant of what they're trying to tell him and I . That's the part that I dislike the most .

But I , I also will say there was a line where Roy and Keely were talking about sex and he I recognize as my , as the resident crew on the show I I will often be , I don't know , I don't know how to describe it , but there was this moment where Roy was saying and correct me if I , if I'm butchering the what he said , but he was basically like , oh , I

I'm amazed by people who can do one certain sex , like people have sex in the woods or something , because I could never be that free , right , yes , and I was Roy in this scene .

I was looking at them going , holy shit , like they're just unabashedly like sexuality is is painted on them , you know , like a , like , a marker , like , and they're completely comfortable with it . So , beard walking down in this speedo and then you guys talking about how there's that he is transgressing in some way .

Presupposes he would think of it as a transgression , whereas , like I'm , like he is so wildly in it as far as , whatever this is with Jane that I'm like maybe , maybe he doesn't even occur to him that this would be , and the look that that . So I'm like I'm looking for markers as the Greek chorus . What are they ?

What is the show telling us to think about this ? And it was Ted and Rebecca sharing like a inside laugh of like pleasure . They weren't disgusted , they weren't . There was no eye rolls , right ? You know what I'm talking about . Was there an eye roll ?

And also when Ted , when Beard comes in , ted looks at him , looks at Beard , looks him up and down and gives a look like oh , this was not just a , I guess you guys had a good time last night . This was for both of them a . We sort of can't believe that you're in a thong in the kitchen right now .

You know you can't literally polite company is not you know you're the conversational version . Well , if we had saying you're the conversational version of the beard thong . But when you look at Rebecca's reaction to this , and I give you that she definitely like , turns away , but then but there is laughter .

So anyway , we don't have to dwell on this , it doesn't matter in the whole scheme of things , but I thought it was an interesting position . Well , the show made me feel like I was Roy in that thing . Oh , I could never be this free and I admired it , and especially now you have . You have Jane come in right and she says I went through the boss .

You say I came , as is the straight face , because I was like , oh my God , like what kind of person this is .

I have mentioned before that I have a friend who made a sex joke to my grandmother and my older sister's birth baby shower .

So I think that the skill when you were that kind of person is that you need to know exactly where the line is and exactly how to trespass it , and then it works for you . And I think having Beard and Jane do these things shows that they are wildly unsure of where the line is they're not that person , right , they're not that person . Oh , there's a line .

What they are telling us about these characters is that they are unaware of other people's feelings to the point where they will bulldoze them over regardless of what the other people think , and I do not like that for either one of them .

And now the two of you are emerging in states of undress in the kitchen which I just have to think about anyway . I'm like listen , listen , you know there needs to be a place in the house where we're all agreeing that we're going to act right . And the kitchen strikes me as that place .

So , yeah , it does feel , yes , there's a freedom to it , but I do think there's an imposition because there's not the awareness of the line .

And even if he had come in , instead of sort of being unaware that he was in the thong , he came in and it was actually kind of like for shock value or to make them laugh Somehow it might have played differently yeah .

You guys are both identifying boundaries and also maybe it's because of the camera perspective , but we're defaulting to the imposition of the host rather than the experiential excitement of the guest , which maybe is naturally I don't know . We talk about that a lot , about where , about how we tend to default to certain things without even knowing it .

I would argue that we tend to default to the wealthiest person . We have this sort of text thread and I will sometimes notice that even evolved people is like a personal thing . Even some of my more evolved friends will default to deference around the friend of ours who is the wealthiest and I go . Isn't that interesting ?

Instead of just like if one of the other people would say something , they might say it might let them have it , or something like that . So I think we naturally are sort of conditioned by late stage capitalism to sort of look from Rebecca's point of view on this one .

But , coach , you make a great point that yeah , it's , maybe it's just over the top , Maybe it's just a bit too much . So anyway , yeah , it's a blazer , but help yourself . Hey , thanks for letting us all crash here last night . You know when I got Beards text saying that , when I got Beards text , by the way , not Ted's text- oh no , that's that's two .

I mean they addressed it immediately comedically , but I laughed at the time .

Like look at her face , as you know , as she's absorbing his closeness .

it into the scene . That doesn't quite work for the characters , but they were having so much fun that they couldn't not do it .

This is the last time we come up like this , I mean , you know last and first time , but still , you know Rebecca's like no , no , no . And Ted says yeah , boss , don't want to talk about it . Yet it's not that I refuse to talk about you going home , ted , it's that I refuse to accept that you're not coming back . Ok , boss , nothing .

The , the hysterical Hulu vampire , I'm sure that was the hysterical Hulu vampire vampire show the , the , it's like what we do in the shadows . Yes , thank you , jesus Christ . Well , I feel like I didn't get it after that , hulu vampire show . Well , I don't know , wasn't that a , or is it FX Technically ? I don't think it was . Yeah , fx . Yeah , but it was .

Yeah , I think there was like a beard dying , cool . But yeah , ok , it's not that I refuse to talk about you going home to it , so I refuse to accept that you're not coming back . And you know this thing we get we get a beat here , boss , I'm right there with you , and then we get a little button . And when this button happened , ok .

So first of all , my mindset when I'm watching this is this is borderline cruelty to the Ted Becker truthers .

We call it out on the rapid reaction , like yeah , this was like this is like , like emotional violence , which you do not expect from the like wow , man , you're going to really , because people were really I don't know what , what , what percentage of our listener community was really invested in this .

But we felt badly when we watched it and we talked about it offline . The three of us were like , oh man , these poor people .

Because , whether or not it's like when you , when you know , people just think differently than you , whatever the case may be , there are sometimes where people have different political things or , or let's say , religious things or whatever , they just think that it's very , very ingrained in there , in their , in their belief system .

And then you see whatever , sometimes evidence of it , of it sort of not being the case . Sometimes people refuse to accept it . So , for example , a smaller case of microcosm is boss saying like no , he wouldn't have , I don't believe , I don't buy the heroin thing . Like , I just don't like whatever . I know it , I know what I think about the character .

Boss is nodding along , I'm not putting words in her mouth . She's like , no , I just don't like fucking buy it and we're good , we'll just .

We can live on different planes of existence , but in my ideal , ted Lasso experience this , this sort of foray into Beards wackiness that is misaligned with the true , like the depth of weirdness of his character that has been presented throughout the whole show . We can agree to disagree that that doesn't exist .

So to this day , you have Ted Beckett truth or like , trust me they , they got to get like I don't . I'm sorry that you know . The same way , people will talk about stolen elections and the people will talk about whatever it does .

Once we have and again , I'm not , I'm not , I'm not throwing rocks , I'm not saying Ted Beckett truth , there's our election deniers . I'm saying it doesn't matter what it is . You can say I believe in , in in an all powerful God , or I believe in a and no God whatever .

Whatever the case may be , we get these sort of things into our system and then it can be very difficult to to pivot from them . But in this way it was , it was . They did this in Game of Thrones too . I know that the showrunners messed with book readers on a number of things . Luckily I was not a book reader , so I didn't have to absorb any of that .

Boss , do you remember any of that stuff ? Lady Stoneheart and some of the other like I just remember certain things where I am not a book reader either .

There's a couple that and they know who they are , who who love to stir things up and I'm wondering if we ever did . I don't think we consciously do things , it's . I just think it's a weird choice . I think it's a very strange choice because what they do is they make you , if you're a 10 back of truth .

You go oh my God , oh my God , oh my God , oh my God , like you have this moment where you're like this is for me , and then they pull , they really pull the rug out and they and sort of identify and know that . And in his AMA , brendan Hunt was like you know , somebody asked him oh , did you ever talk about Ted Derove again together ?

And he's like of course , out of professional responsibility was talked about , but never with . What was the term boss ? Never with any ?

And by doing this here , it's like let that go so that you can actually experience the story that is happening , as opposed to waiting for the will . There won't be a moment . Didn't they do a version of this before ? When ?

It's for whatever reason . It isn't for me . I can't . There's nothing wrong with it . What I've seen has been fine . It's just not for me . Somebody reviewed whatever most recent episode .

It is saying that it was done entirely for fan service and this in a weird way , feels like the opposite of fan service that by doing it in this way it did almost tease the Ted Becka truthers into believing for a second it could happen and then immediately ripping it away from them , knowing what they wanted and not giving it to them .

And I also think in the rapid reaction we said that we genuinely felt for the Ted Becka truthers who had seen this and hoped and then had that hope ripped away . Yeah , it's just like . I think it's just like . I think it's just like . Yeah , it felt similar to me . When were the Dodgers good the last time ?

I can't remember when , but I have a body who lives out in LA , he's a Dodgers fan and they made it to the playoffs and they almost made it to the World Series or something . I think it was the Dodgers One of those buddies that loves a team that sucks and I can't pay attention to .

I know the red socks like the Bruins , the fucking Eagles one of those assholes . But anyway , I did need to text in and say like I'm sorry about your team , I don't care about your team , I don't care if they win . They could fall into the fucking Pacific for all I care , but maybe it was the Giants Shit . I used to have more friends back in the day .

But anyway , my point of all this is all of this rambling is to say I think that the show runners genuinely did want to acknowledge that people out there felt like Ted and Rebecca should get together and saying we heard you , we don't agree . We are going to give you this moment where you could imagine whatever you want to , but it's not going to happen .

I don't know this whole opening for me . It's not my favorite .

It was just just sort of well , in deference to the excellence of the writing staff and the team that made this amazing show , I'm going to choose to look at it as a inside baseball sort of wink . So I'm saying I know we're all in this together . I know you guys wanted this , but like wink , we can't do it .

see Ted and Rebecca together right now and then the show and one hour later . So maybe it was in a weird way a sort of kindness , and that they didn't .

rather than an outright rejection of a certain perspective . We have the housekeeper come in and gasp which is what ? Which is a sort of a button , a callback to the time Hunky Luca was in there . She says I'll start in the guest rooms , which is another , another sort of a beat .

I will say that , just having her come in and gasp , I was like oh yeah , yeah , this is the final voyage of the Starship Enterprise . Like , oh shit , right , I mean , it took a lot of . You know , you're already like , if you truly love the show and you're like I'm never going to have another Ted Lasso , a new Ted Lasso episode .

I remember being like very emotional anyway , and then when I saw something like this , I was like Jesus , like you know , this is here we are .

You know what I mean . Like in my heart . I'm like the , the , the four of them in the kitchen , one of them wearing a blazer , the other one got all the thongs sitting on the counter , I mean it was crazy . So I just kind of had a chuckle for that .

Anyone care to care to fill me in on this Like , because I got like sort of secretary vibes from that .

Getting tied up is a thing that people have heard of . The reason why they're dirty doesn't make any sense to me . They shouldn't be Just hygienically . They shouldn't be . You shouldn't have dirty ropes in those areas . It's not a good idea . This is like having sex on the beach . People think that it's a good idea . It never is .

Sand gets into places where sand doesn't belong . It's uncomfortable for everybody .

And Jane Payne , you know , we know what she's capable of .

She definitely has a perspective on the world that is not inside the norm , but that gets us out of the scene and we end to the theme music and now we are embarking on the SS finale it's actually the HMS finale because we're over in England and so we say thank you , boss nodded to me for the correction . Here you hear you .

This locker room is now in session .

Then we have the honorable Judge McAdoo walk in and he's got on what seems like a track suit , but then it's black with the gold and there's some frills sort of added to it along with essentially a castle-powdered wig , the lace fringes . I mean it's supposed to be sort of a modern take on that justice . Who would be in a court with the powdered wig on ?

Very funny to me that these guys have taken this stuff and embraced it . It's sort of like when Ted says you don't have to do the voices when he's first introducing them to play each other's roles and they all complain that they don't get to do the voices . Yes , yes , it's kind of in that spirit of like we're in . This is now what we do .

This is how our family does it .

Like Bontz just shook her head . She's like oh hell , no , danny as the judge . I'm like , oh my God , these guys all have their . But listen , this is a credit to the show . It's so amazing that we can say any of these guys . If I said , okay , colin is now the judge , both of you could ref on what his ruling would be and where it would come from .

If I said Jamie is . If I said Roy is . If I said Beard is . If I said Bumpercatchy , bumpercatch , sam , right , yeah , even Bumpercatch . Yeah , right , bumpercatch was a here to for ancillary type character , but who we've gotten to know through very specific interactions about the Hague and World Monetary Fund and certain things that we just go man .

So again , if we put Nate there , if we put Will there , these characters are so well drawn that they have surpassed their archetypal sort of flavor and become all sorts of different shades of subtlety , and we would be able to project what they might do . In this case , however , it is Isaac . He is the captain .

All rise for the honorable Judge McAlebe be seat Court Treasurer . He calls who's the Court Treasurer ? Coach .

That are your honor , and please remember that all fines will go towards funding our end of season party this Sunday night at the restaurant to which all the players cheer , so they're handing out some justice , but they're having a good time with it for sure .

And he says the assistant kit man has it . And did any of you get the reference here assistant to the kit man ?

If anybody had mentioned happy birthday , it would have been fine , but I didn't know that this was gonna get shot down , because these are like sharers . They enjoy each other's company and have feelings , so that's fine . They have a different standard than I do .

A blind porpoise , or he might be a seal , but he's blind , so they had to train him about actually hearing , food and everything else so that he would survive in the aquarium .

I'm sorry , maybe it's just called the Atlanta Aquarium , I forget Was down there for a wedding and took my kids and there was a beluga whale thing two like white beluga whales and it was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen in my life . So I was gonna direct the . I can . Only I was stuck at the . I was just like stuck .

I'm like I can't believe this exists in this world and like people are trying to pull me like okay , dad , can we like ? And I'm like leave me like , leave me alone .

It just doesn't make any sense .

to pay up . I do like also that he would assume everybody's sleeping .

I would be like sort of horrified . I don't know how to describe it , but I remember when I first got together with Juliana , there was this moment where I went over to her apartment and I don't know what happened , but she was reading . I remember she was reading on her bed and I lay down next to her and she was just reading , like casually reading .

She was a film executive at the time , so she had this , all these scripts she had to read , and so I didn't want to interrupt her but I just wanted to see her .

So I just was there , I was laying on her bed and it was a pretty new relationship and I remember her just like rubbing my hair as she was reading and I passed out like fully , and I was like when I woke up I was like , oh my God , this is a really serious relationship , like I have no idea , like how did I let myself off ?

You know , like , because it's just something that I'm conscious of . So you get this beat here with Jamie , where , okay , god , he has come so far and I can't even like we could do a whole episode on this one moment , but fall asleep during the thing . Bro , everyone was sleeping For the fun of it .

He complains , right , he's not actually completely care , but he's like you should , you're gonna like you should , you should like call out everybody . You know why am I getting penalized ? And then he's like oh , I was the one who was snoring , sticks his tongue out , has fun with it .

Now Nate is the one who comes over with the box , the same box that once upon a time . Coach , what did Jamie put in that box when they were all gonna chip in for Sam's birthday ? What did ?

He did so many jerky things that I don't know that I can say it was sort of the absolute apex of his jerkiness but in a way it was just because the power dynamic was what it was and he just could have done nothing , but he really had to , like , make a point of being an ass . So , yeah , this is where he put in the gum .

And you know , he had Ted have it come over and talked to him about me being a part of the team . And now here he is , wearing an Icon Icon .

She's like watching Cheers reruns while we're overdoing this .

That there is not a single person in this room who would run through fire , for Jamie Tart at this point is mind bogg , and there might not be a single person in the city of Manchester who would not , right . You know what I mean . Like . This is who he became , right before our very eyes , when he was an ass hat . When we first met him , he was .

He was toxic , he was cruel , he was mean spirited . The things he said to Sam were offensive , he was a bully . And now he has evolved to this point , to the point where not only does he not put gum into the box , to like sabotage it , what does he do , coach ?

Pretty far away from me , me , me pointing to the back of his jersey .

But , hopefully , where you're heading towards a place where it is less about every individual wanting to be the superstar , and the idea of being a cog in the machine , especially in terms of your work or your profession , for a very long time was a I am completely dispensable .

I am unimportant if I am a cog in the machine and the machine runs and I'm just here to do my silly little job and nobody cares about me and I need to stand out . I need to make myself , I need to individualize in order to make myself important within this and that the new framing is more of .

I am part of a larger , greater force that does more good than I could do on my own , and I don't actually have a problem with people being isolated or working on their own Like I'm a fucking accountant .

I don't reach out that often to team build or work with other people , but I understand that my role within my organization is only as important as anybody else's and that I don't need to make my work about me in order for it to be beneficial .

It feels a lot like I think I mentioned way back in the first season when we were talking about Maslow's hierarchy of needs and how his interpretation as a western white dude of an idea that I believe he took from indigenous people is this is how you self-actualize , this is how you become the best version of yourself .

But in the original version it was this is how you build community that you give everybody their physical , make sure everybody's physical needs are met , you give them the love and the attention and everything else that they need , and then they become part of the larger community that could feed back into other people , and that that is a much more sustainable version

than we just are going to build this one guy up to his highest point . We are going to fulfill what he needs in order for him to fulfill what everybody else in the community needs yeah .

I love the Pink Floyd reference and I love the fact that there's been a sort of a you know migration from the like Joe versus the volcano , nightmarish , automaton sort of version of a human worker to it's more like it takes a village style thing , like where , yes , you are part of the whole but the whole , but your part is important to the whole and the

whole matters in and of itself .

But , like , I am thankful . I am grateful for a show that has built this character in my lifetime . Well , I got to watch it in real time and saw this person change . Because I believe that's possible , I believe it . I believe it in a way that I can . But we've all taken our potshots at the Nate sort of trajectory and the and the arc of his redemption .

But God , this one was so well drawn , you just . It's almost like I would be hard pressed to think of other characters that showed this level of where the beats of the of the redemption arc were so universally sort of accepted .

Like I don't think anybody was ever off the Jamie arc , right , coach , if you're on that roller coaster , you kind of stayed on that roller coaster with James whatever they did , it didn't ever buck you or make you think like , oh yeah , I don't think this is the right way , so to have this final moment here with , with native all people who was the one that

saw what a prick he was about the gum ? You just say this is a , this is a beautiful moment . Is there anything else ? I'm quoting the show by some setting you up say is there anything else ?

Is that the number I'm remembering ?

In the same way they're talking about his dad or dealing with his mom , he's at the beginning of this . I am choosing to believe that Nate Shelley is not going from the head coach of a football club to the assistant to the kit man , and that that's going to be the end of his journey .

I am assuming that this is a temporary position Maybe contracts or something else that came into it where he can't be a head coach , and so he is going to rejoin the team and play this role that his contract will allow until next year , when they can figure some shit out .

It still seems slightly shitty that , for a man who just lost his job , you were going to make him give you five thousand pounds when you know he is not a head coach again yet .

I'm aware of that , but I'm not constantly aware of it , and there was something about five thousand pounds I made because this comes up in my head . I said to you regularly the dream team . I always think about them , that original 92 team .

They described that they played , they would play cards like pretty much every single night and at some point they start , like people start mentioning the stakes that they would play for like it was nothing , to have some hand .

It was 10 , 20 , 30 , you know , like whatever , a thousand dollars in the hand , and you know , for somebody like me who , like I'll do like a $20 , buy in maybe 40 if this is for charity , you know the idea of having that kind of money fly the rug , what in the world ? So to me , that coach between this group of people , so I got .

And they also talked about certain God I can't even say it because probably breach of privacy but some of the exactly we're saying they would do certain things where you go , oh my , oh , my God , like , like , I just like a hundred grand past , like right , right in front of my eyes , like , like in this round , yeah , and I'm like yeah .

Yeah , yeah , anyway , sorry .

What is it ? I think maybe it's one of the Freakonomics books . They talk about how a daycare center someplace was having trouble with parents picking up the kids up on time , and so when like 10 of them weren't doing it , they decided they were going to start charging a fee . And every hour that you relate , they're going to charge you an extra $25 .

And then the late pickups increased because it went from a . I owe this person my responsibility to show up on time to get my kids to . Oh well , it costs $25 for an extra hour .

Either he has so much money that $5,000 is nothing to him and he is making a contribution to the rest of the team to make up for not being there , or this is a significant amount of money for him , in which case you are screwing over this guy for coming back and trying to do what's right , like there's . I understand what they were going for .

It just didn't quite line up for me .

It was a you're part of this team and therefore this is how we do it , so you're going to do it . If we just add up like , oh , these guys are 200 for this little tiny infraction , how much would it be if we did infractions for the whole season ? Let's just say 5,000 , nice round number and Nate goes yeah , that's fair . I mean , I deserve it .

Like he's so happy to be back . And in the same way that Jamie didn't like that , he was the only one that didn't get to play like someone else . And remember that Nate would also not like being excluded . He wants to be included by the same rules that everybody else is , because that signifies that he is actually part of the continuum .

And that's much more important than any suffering Nate is doing right now and they all cheer and it's a beautiful moment for the team .

And as rough as I've been on Nate throughout the course of the not Nate in general , but the trajectory of his redemption arc I got so choked up when Isaac was listening all of his infractions and that he says , for missing every training session , every match and every team dinner and I think they have done a great job making us aware of just how impactful Nate

now realizes that absence was to his life . He had to go somewhere . Sometimes we all have to break out and try something new to appreciate what we have .

One of my friends told me this the guy that made fun of me , captain Steven guy , is like one of your superpowers is you always know when you're in the middle of a good thing and you make sure people know it . I remember like , wow , this is really insightful .

yeah . I remember I had this great team . I worked for this startup . I got a job repairing computers and then the company when I got hired was 200 people and then a couple years later it was 1200 . So I got promoted like crazy and in that time I had a team of like 30 people under me . It was like so , so quick . But my team was amazing .

The people were amazing . I had the luxury of hiring people that were like awesome , even if they didn't know anything , and I was like a lot of it was entry level so I could train them in the way with them . And then we ended up with this team of like just the best people , and I remember saying to them during the time I was like guys , look around .

Like I promise you , like you may never be on a team this good . I don't want to be , you know , like I don't want to like say the future portends terrible things , but this is like an amazing team and I want you guys to appreciate it . I feel that way about this podcast and about the listening community . I just am .

So if you're part of our Buttercup community , I urge people who are on the fence about joining support the podcast . All the subscription stuff is in the description of the episode . But these people are tremendous and sophisticated and deep thinkers and kind and the emails that they've been sending and the interactions we've had are just so stunning .

And it's all thanks to this brilliant show and what it opened up for people and the path that it all sort of put us on . So I want to sort of mark that here and and remain grateful .

And so at one point you know , you know , coach the kids I was coaching this eighth grade team they were fantastic . I was sure they were going to win this championship game . The only thing that could stop them was believing too firmly that they were going to win .

And then sleepwalking into this thing and blowing it Like we were ready and we would have been a lot of teams and we're at the last practice before this game , just sort of walking through some things .

We had like a hurry up that we would run , so we were sort of just walking that and they fall started and they've been kind of losing their concentration before they fall started on a play . I didn't say a word and the other coach and I just standing there looking at them and the quarterback goes all right , guys , let's go .

And they all ran down and back .

And I remember they came back They'd say another word they lined up , they ran what they were supposed to run next and that was it . But I still remember the feeling , and that's what I mean , when it becomes a standard . It's not that , oh , coach , will kill us if we don't get this right , it's like no , we , that's what we do we're ?

You couldn't be on this team and decide like , oh , I don't wish people happy birthday . Like , fuck you , you don't . You do now . Yeah boss , I will not .

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