¶ Fantasy Football Frustrations and Team Names
Welcome to our Ted Lasso talk , the Tedcast . Welcome all Greyhound fans , welcome all you sinners from the dog track and all the AFC Richmond fans around the world .
It's the lasso way around these parts with Coach , coach and Boss Without further ado . Coach Castleton , actually , before we start I was going to say hello and greetings and all that stuff , coach . I just want Boss to hear what it's like like to be a fly on the wall .
Not that she can't believe me I know she doesn't care about this , but we have not talked about your fantasy football weekend in our league and we just haven't had a chance to catch up . You were puking after the draft . Oh , you were embarrassing . You got drunk , took off your clothes in front of everybody .
Will you stop it ? That is not . I got legitimately sick , it was not a hand . He's such a jerk , he's such a jerk .
You rubbed your packer up against other guys . Right , right , right , right , right . No , I got she's like what I got ?
sick as a dog , I was so sick , I was so sick , I was so sick , I was so sick , I was so sick , I was so sick as a dog , I was so sick . And I still do not understand what happened . I was sick till Thursday . Like legitimately I don't feel okay . Walking biggie down the block and back up was like and we're done .
It sounded like COVID level or like a yeah I tested it .
It wasn't COVID , but I'm telling you like my legs were like it was like what the fuck ? Yeah , I got really sick and yeah . So , no , I'm , you know I'm better , but it was , it was wild , yeah , and it was . It was absolutely not a haggle . Okay , I was like I'm telling till Thursday . I was like seriously and yeah .
I just , I just , I want now , okay . So now we've had the NFL weekend NFL checkoff this past .
Thursday I was sick watching that .
And then we had okay , good , Now I just want boss to hear what it's like coming right out of the horse . Just talk to me like you would normally talk to me .
What did you ?
think what did you think this weekend ? You , everybody , your teams , I was disgusted .
So , okay , so the first . So I'm going to be , I'm going to be real about it Like , just truly what it's like . So you go , you , you spent all this this time , all these hours , and you ask oh boy , youth movement and values , and blah , blah , blah . And who's made changes ? And all this shit , and everybody's like we got it all fucking figured out now .
We are geniuses and anybody who thinks something the other thing about the fantasy world is anybody who thinks a different thing is an idiot , because obviously this is the only of all the millions of permutations we've all decided this is the only one that's going to happen .
And I promise you , after all those months and all that talk , it doesn't take through the first quarter of the first game for you to go . This is all fucking bedlam and nothing makes any goddamn sense . And what have we done with our lives ? But it's like the changing of the leaves on the tree .
So I'll give you an example Lamar Jackson , who's accepted like what are the you know great quarterbacks and leave blah , blah , blah , blah , blah , blah , a good quarterback score . What would you say , coach , between , at least between like 20 and 25 points , and a guy like him you expect to give you like 25 to 30 , right .
Yeah , oh yeah . You're hoping for 35 every week from him . Yeah , right around there .
And it could absolutely happen . No problem , he scored four points yesterday .
And wait . And who and whose team is he on ? Make it , make it make sense for boss ?
Oh , I'm sorry , I'm sorry for on my team . So I draft this guy . So you look at your team and you go all right , well , at least I've got . I've got X and Y and Z . So , come hell or high water , I should at least have this . And if some things break my way , great .
It's the equivalent of buying a Mercedes and having it break down as you pull off the line because , like what just happened , and I enjoy , I get so angry I have to find a way to get it out because I am I joke that I'm throw my chair angry and I can make jokes about that .
But part of it is because I actually do envision myself throwing that chair and I honestly was like I would throw a chair at Lamar's head right now , like this is why I like they'd be like what , what coach , what happened ? What do you mean ? He's dead and I'd be like I know I'm sorry , but you need to understand that he scored four points .
Like I feel like we're not totally understanding each other right now . Four points , really .
So I understand that feeling . That feeling actually sucks so hard when you're like this is it , this is it , this is I am , I am so in on this . There's no way it could go wrong . And then , of course , it immediately goes wrong .
What I was trying to find actually was so you talked about the research and you know the planning and everything else that went into this that you know , you have read , you have checked the statistics , you know all of that .
Um , I last season did a spreadsheet where I was like well , all of these team names are animals , so we're going to put them into one group , and so the bears and the colts and the birds , the animals , the mythical creatures , the teams that used to be jobs , aka the Steelers and the Packers and whatnot . It's amazing . I'm like wait we're just going .
I'm so excited right now .
That's all that it went to . I was just like , okay , well , I think that the steam would win , based entirely on the name . I think that the dolphins would get the shit kicked out of them every single game from now . And this is great , because who's going to get beat up ? A cardinal ? You're going to get beat up by a cardinal .
How are you going to get beat up by a cardinal ?
To pack your eyes up , boss , like in a video game .
You have to be strapped to something laying down for them to do that , because otherwise you just wave an arm or move .
Yeah , you're flapping it . Yeah , you'd have to be Promethean in order to .
Like otherwise , that's not scary . The bangles come on . I would fucking own a bangle . I mean as a pet , literally . I would own a bangle . If they would let me , I would keep one . This is so great .
So wait , so no , this is fantastic . I want to come back to this because , yes , but I , you just made me think of that this is that you talk about digging in the crates . This is a , this is a , this is a . I'm reaching way back on this . So you're both . Have you both seen what's happening ? Like that shows all this far ? Yes , actual show .
Have you watched it ? Okay , so , all right . So there's an episode where you know , because I'm sure it was like the fourth or fifth season , and we're like Jesus , fuck a Christ , what are we going to do with these kids that we haven't already done ? And they just somehow Dwayne ends up picking all these football winners and he's like , they're like savant now .
So , like , people are like gathering , like it's like building up and gathering around , and you know , oh my God , how's he doing this ? He's such a genius , right , like you know , they're like clearing the chair so he can sit and they're getting making sure as burgers , the way he likes it .
And so , finally , because it's sitcom , we know what happened , and so they're like oh , you know what went wrong and they were like so what ? You know what was the system ? And he had .
It was like , I want to say it was like the distance between this and that and whatever , and then he go , and then he goes , and then I would just pick the helmet I like the best .
Yes , no , that's a valid , that's an extremely valid way of predicting winners , absolutely .
And so when you said that about the animals , and like a dolphin girl , I was like , listen , let me tell you something . For all my spreadsheets I might as well just been like a car . No , can't be a bear . A car ?
no , can't beat up a bear . I don't know what a bill is . I think I looked it up one time and it turns out that it's like the first major winning coach was named Bill something . So they named the Buffalo Bills the Buffalo Bills .
And .
I think that that's it . I only looked it up because , it's so dumb , and also because they have the Buffalo as the mascot , but there haven't been Buffalo in New York in like a few hundred years .
So yeah .
I had a similar years ago . I did one March Madness bracket one time because they said here are all the names and you pick which one you think is going to win . And I thought Gonzaga sounded funny and I was like , yeah , so they won . And then they like made it to I don't know the quarter finals or something like they made it really far .
Yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah . I don't know if I won money , but people are like oh shit , I only knows what she's doing , how'd you do that .
Yeah , I don't . Yeah , that's so great .
I don't . That is so great , I don't care for Florida and I do like Gonzaga Valparaiso also fun to say . So they got in there too .
They got in . So they get you , get you advanced , you advanced the weekend too . I'm not done saying Valparaiso yet I like .
Valparaiso sounds good .
I fucking love it . You know what's funny too about that . Like professional gamblers , like the people little , no , no , I swear to God , the people who do this , like that is their actual job , that's how they eat . They don't break 60% on their bets . So , like actually in no bullshit , your system is not statistically that far .
Excuse me , pardon me , sorry , there you go .
I was going to say I'm only here celebrating , but no , that's fair .
But yeah , and they like you know so . Actually . Sure , Valparaiso is fun to say . We may all laugh , but at the end of the day I bet about a lot of brackets got busted that weekend , for people would watch every weekend , every big Tuesday of the season , and they didn't know what the fuck was going on .
Yeah , I put a lot of stock in this , though Weirdly I put a lot .
So Juliana has a thing where we go to when we're looking for a new house or when we moved around we're a little bit younger , you know we'd have to rent departments and things like that and we'd go in and whether I liked it or not , it became clear that like she was attuned to the energy of a place .
Like if you go to Sedona , you go to Sedona , right , and there are vortices they say vort magnetic fields , right , and some people can sense them and some people like does something to them , so a lot of well , sometimes people get it from the ocean .
They say they get some electricity off the sand or some kind of you know , like people can feel something from the ocean . And then you have like pieces of granite , like me who stand in the center of the forest and like I got nothing Right , right . Right , I do not know what you're referring to . I think you're putting me on .
But so we would go to these apartments and things and look for houses and she would just like kind of get a vibe from the place . And I learned to trust it so much that there was this we were looking to buy a house years ago , moving to Massachusetts from California , looking to buy a house . It was this unbelievable house . It was a deal we could afford .
It was sort of a 1920 . They said it was built by someone who was like a flapper in the 20s and they used to have big parties in it and you could see it . It was like just had this amazing vibe and I was like , oh my God . I started picturing my kids running around in the house .
You know that kind of thing . Oh , yeah , yeah , yeah , you're already like moving , you're already like deciding like which lamp goes over there .
Yeah , yeah , yeah , I was there , yeah , you know , talking to the real estate agent , and then I see Juliana on the front porch and I walk out . There's a huge , huge porch , like 20 foot wide porch , elevated . It was . The place was unbelievable . And I said what are you thinking ? Like , you like this place or you know what do you think ?
And she , she's like closed her eyes and then open and like to me she's like I sense like teen suicide and I was like okay thank you very much . I should have like just shook hands with the guy , like , okay , well , that'll be it for us . Before this fantasy football season , I did something I've never done before , which was you coach . Remember I had ?
We all have keepers . You can keep a player from your team last year . So I went through my keepers list with her and I said who do you like Whatever ? Just said the names and just try to get a read on them . And this is the truth . She said the one player that on my team that you know broke out this week , coach .
She said he is the key to everything . I don't know , I don't know what that is , but that's the key . His name is , too , at Tunga Vila , and she's like he's the glue , he's the key to everything . And then she said this other guy had a keeper . She's like , oh , I don't know , I really worry about him , so I don't think you should pick him .
And he got injured in the . Oh , it was Dobbins .
Oh shit , no , it was , it was . It was on Steelers John Johnson .
Oh , yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , he did get it .
He was a keeper . Oh my God , I did have Dobbins .
¶ The Existence of Unexplained Phenomena
See , here's my thing about shit like that and I you know it's actually similar . For me it's similar to like certain religious things People talk about . It is similar to when people talk about horoscopes or this or that whatever . Just because I can't explain some shit does not mean there's nothing to it .
Now , I don't think we should necessarily be like running the NIH based on , you know , juliana closing her eyes and going you know , but like just because we can't explain things doesn't mean there's nothing to it or it's bullshit . Like I that's , that's wild .
I mean you know you hear some story where it's like , oh yeah , I saw a little girl at the top of the stairs and then you do some history of the house . You know , you constantly hear stories like that and it's like oh yeah , there was a little girl who died here when blah , blah , blah .
You know , just because I can't explain it , it does not mean there's nothing to it , so that's , that's wild .
Yeah , there's something . There is something . So I have a favorite , a favorite inn in New England and I have a favorite hotel in Florida of all places . And the inn in New England is where I had my first marriage and the place in Florida is where I just like fell in love . I went to this place and I just loved .
I happened to be there driving through and I was on the street and I was like what is that huge , gorgeous hotel ? And it turns out . I say that I'm a piece of granite , but it turns out these are the two most haunted places in North America , oh shit . Which is why I was like , oh , that's interesting , like how , what are the odds ?
One is in Bennington .
Vermont yeah it's like yeah , it's like yeah .
Florida . Like yeah , like , where is it ? St Pete's Beach , florida . Like why would you ever ?
you know what I mean , what are the odds , so I don't know what it is , but I feel like I'm probably the skeptic on the show , more so than you two .
Since I'm a cynical asshole and don't believe in anything , I will say that I read an article years ago about how sometimes there are things that are outside of our perception that other instruments can prove are in fact real .
So , like there was a house with a basement , when you went down into the basement you were overwhelmed with sense of dread and like you would become cold to the touch and immediately want to run away .
And it wasn't just one person , like multiple people would go down there , so they were like oh , fucking basement has to be haunted , like there's an evil spirit down there that people are trying to get away from .
It turns out they figured out there's a factory some distance away and that the vibration was low enough that you couldn't hear it , but it was at the same frequency as large predators from back in the caveman days .
That's amazing .
So there was something biological that humans were picking up on like a vibration or frequency or something , and you immediately responded to oh shit , a tiger is about to eat my ass .
I need to get the fuck out of here .
And you couldn't explain it because it wasn't actually happening , but it was . So what I will say is like I'm not going to say it must be ghosts , but there's probably some shit that we're going to find out something in a little bit . That's like when you look at something at this wavelength . It's right , I'm 100% with you .
So like I tend to be very much
¶ Emotional Attachment to Fantasy Football
with you . In general , I tend to be a skeptic about these things , but I also have learned over the years like , okay , I guess I just exactly what coach said . Just because I can't explain it doesn't mean it's not real . And I and I always ask like basic things why , why does ? Why ?
Can you feel when someone's looking at you Like how is what is that even ? How do you identify that ? Come on , why do ? Why do all kids feel like there's a monster under the bed ? You know like little , like why is it universal things that we've learned and I'm guessing it's in the genetic code , from being a you know prey for 150 million years .
You know , I'm guessing that's what it is , some version of that . But but yeah , I don't know . It's fascinating and I think it's something and I don't think we know what it is and therefore it lends itself to all sorts of explanations .
But I was going to , I was asking when I started this coach , I just wanted you to get , I wanted people to hear what it's like , like it's almost like religion . It's almost like religion , like people start during the anti fantasy season . People spend so much time wrapping their emotions into things they cannot control .
It's almost like if you had a religion but you could pit your God against somebody else's God and then like there'd be results . And then you would think like , oh damn crap , I'm mad for a week now because my God lost that . It's similar to that . There's no like influence over the outcome in any way , but yet people will be emotional about the results .
I forget who sent out the you know artists , formerly known as a tweet whatever , and . But they said , like , prepare to spend the next four months . Oh no , when you , when something goes wrong with your team today , just know that you're right and it's totally a reflection of who you are .
I laughed so hard because , I'm telling you , daphne used to know whether or not , as I would walk up the stairs even when we were back , like before we even moved in here just 20 years ago , so we were back when we were living Culver City she could tell from my walk up the stairs whether or not it was a winning Sunday or a losing Sunday .
But she just knew like it was that . And you do , like I can make jokes again , I can make jokes about it now , but you do take it personally . Actually , coach and I , a while back I don't know how many years ago it was now , but we with another guy from a League friend of ours , used to do a fantasy football podcast and actually got pretty far along .
Like I was doing , like Sunday morning , start sit questions for people and would coach was doing all these articles and all that shit . So anyway , he but I made a jingle , like in one of our segments , for the one of the segments for the show was introduced by . I was dependent on him and I hope he dies . Fuck that guy .
In like four part harmony and I took the time to record it and it really was like because you have to get back in touch with how insane it is . But you take it personally . You're like I only needed seven more yards . You fucking asshole For guy is his actual livelihood is writing on this . But the issue is not that .
The issue is I only needed seven more points . What's wrong with you ?
I had a player last year who was coming back from injury and I was just , I just think he's a really good running back and I drafted him last year . I put him on my team and everybody made fun of me because they're like he's going to get hurt and I was like no , in my mind , like it'll be fine . He's a really good player .
He ran the ball in college , never got hurt in college , it's just a fluky thing . So I drafted him this is last season drafted him . I probably got two starts out of him before he got hurt and was out for the season . Everybody said told you , so made fun of me . It was great .
He had more time to recover this off season and I still liked him and I still thought it was going to be good . And so I drafted him again . And then he was starting for me this this past week in the opening weekend and looked fantastic . And then and then , just on a fluke , little nothing .
Tori is Tori's Achilles tendon and it was out for the season again and my first thought was , well , I'm not going to fucking draft this guy . And then I caught myself and I said , oh my God did you just hear what ? Yeah , no , you just hear your insensitivity and this poor man , this poor man .
His career might have just ended Like it might be done legitimately .
Yeah , he might never be able to play again . Yeah , yeah , yeah .
Yeah .
In fact , in his friend he got a touchdown and in his first touchdown he kind of jumped into the end zone , jumped over the line and he looked so happy that for a moment I was like , oh , this is so nice that he gets to be back doing what he loves , that he's great at , something he's done his whole life and now , like , it might be over .
But it doesn't change the fact that the first thought that went through my mind was how it affected me , and I was like , oh my God , this is a terrific .
No , it's great , but I mean we talked about this in another context . Well , let me say this first about it . It's also , though , an interesting way . It's almost like . It's almost like emotional scrimmaging Because I'm not sure , like I didn't know that happened yesterday .
I knew that happened yesterday and I actually actively didn't contact coach , like I was like he needs a moment , that's like .
When I saw that the injury , like I even held on to hope , like I was like , well , you know , they say they're gonna get the MRI now , like these guys know , like they know , but you know , I was like , oh , but they're not sure they're getting the MRI .
So I was like holding out , like let's wait till we get the results , because I was like coach is going to die , like he's going to be so devastated . So it was like but we really have our people .
And I also knew there was like another player who coach loves , who made a really great play yesterday , and I literally wrote in our Slack channel I know it was a rough day , but I hope you got to see so and so's Juke on that pattern down the sideline , because any real practice like , yeah , I did see it , that did help .
It's beautiful . I couldn't afford this one player . I always have him . He's one of my guys . I love him . His name is DK Metcalf . He is just a like in the future when you get to choose your own sleeve boss . And you just choose DK Metcalf over and over again , like if I could have one minute in DK Metcalf .
He's amazing .
Physique , like his frame . He is such a specimen it is unbelievable . And he did this move that was just like like a guy . That big coach should not be able to do a move like that , like it's .
You know it's unfair , it was one of those like OK , that's a professional athlete who just made look like a four year old .
You made him look like a four year old . Did you see someone just rain on my parade ? Did you see what boss just did ? She just looked him up and then was like and she did one of these .
No , no , no , no , that was my OK . Yeah , all right .
I got it , oh , ok .
I got it All right If it was that that would have been a hand , a handshake .
That was a hand .
I was like yeah .
He's just , he's just a he's so big and so strong he's . He's not on my team for the first time in a long time .
Right now he's in the commercial and I won't take us too far down the road , but right now he's in the commercial . That but with all the players doing the TV , the the table read for the next season of the NFL . Yeah , and someone says they're supposed to a no hand catch and the person's like how do I do that ?
And he goes I can do no hand catch , I just catch you and you kind of go , you kind of like you're like that's a joke . Also , I'm not 100 percent ruling out that he can do that . Like I'm not saying you can't do that , DK , I'm just saying it's funny .
You might need a thigh in there , but you could do it . He's , he's , he's good .
That's amazing , so anyway , but yeah . But yes , it's all very personal and you take it all very personally . Now you also have because there always has to be this elevate . You have coach and I living in our rooms and me writing out little sketches about you know , throwing things across the locker room and and amusing the guys with them .
But you have people who do legit , like , tweet or whatever at these guys , like they'll act them in it and be like you lost me , my game , you go and like so then it goes off the deep end and it's no longer charming or funny or any of that . But it is .
It is hilarious to really feel like you're going to pull Lamar Jackson , who makes 50 million dollars , a side and go look it . I like you , but this can't keep up , or this . This cannot Happen again , lamar , under any circumstances .
I actually , because I had jail in her slash I wrote another sketch where I treated him like a kid and I was like I'm not comparing you to jail and but , and then , and then , and then . The more I just goes , the more I just goes . I got it coach . So , yeah , it's , it's completely unhealthy . There you go , you do have favorite children you do ?
I mean I mean in your fantasy team , not right ?
No , no for sure .
All right , boss , do you have a sense now of the lunacy and and crazy ? I mean ? I don't know , it's just , it's just a weird thing that happens to to men who have not like still reliving their adolescence , apparently full bore .
I don't know , yeah , I love it .
I love it yeah .
No , women talk about their feelings and men talk about football . I get it , I'm there with you . I got you . Yeah , what's ?
a what's the feeling .
Feeling which is feeling man .
How is that ? When somebody like dives and breaks the plane of the end zone ? How I kind of figure out . What are you talking about ?
How fucked up would this podcast be if I actually were the one most in touch with my feelings ? What would that say ?
Yeah , that's not . Yeah , that's not yeah . That is not something I would want people to be subjected to view .
I really there are a couple of relationships in my life where I am quote , unquote , the emotional one , so you can imagine what those are like , where they're like .
It's like killing Eve . It's like it's like villain A little bit .
It's not . I haven't killed that many people yet , but kind of yes .
I need to finish that show . I loved what I watched and life , and you guys know how I am , but I need to finish that . I did not expect to like that show . I was watching it very much as like part of a kind of research project for something I was working on , as one does , and I was blown away Like I did not .
I like actively thought , like OK , this one's going to be homework . I don't think I'm going to like this , and it was .
Johnny Comer only hits home runs . So she does not matter what Johnny Comer does , she just loves to hit boss . Think about it , think about it .
I haven't , I haven't seen her in that much . I did like Free Guy , although I would have done it differently , I would have edited that differently . I'm just saying , whenever she is great , whatever she can do she will max out the role and and she's delightful .
And , coach , there's that , there's , that's one of those shows . By the way , I'll tell you when to stop , don't you ? Don't go the whole way .
Got it . It's one of those ones Really .
And the Game of Thrones way it ran off .
The Grandin of the Rails Got it . Oh my God .
To the point where , like collectively , people who love the show I list myself among those people are like no , didn't end that way , nope .
Like , just like . Yeah , no , even the actors are like no , you're basically Rebecca sitting in the kitchen . Like , are you ready to talk about this ?
Nope , Not yet . That's kind of like that . Right , Exactly Because you go , because you're like I have a , OK , we're going to actually get . We have one of those on this episode . What a great segue , Boss
¶ Discussion on Characters and Cultural References
. I was going to say , come on , man , you get so invest . Yeah , great great job , Coach . We get so invested in a certain character and you and you go . I fundamentally understand every atom of their being .
This character speaks to me and then some Asshole Usually me , who has created the character and writes them right decides to do something that doesn't align with your . Yeah and you go ? I don't think so , but but it's funny when , collectively , millions of people say , yeah , you go , you go . Oh , that's where did it go off ?
Like you built something and then did you just like . You know , it's like a fight club kind of I just wanted to destroy something , beautiful thing . It's like . Are you doing that , or do you have you lost the tether ? I don't , you know whatever . Before we talk about yes , welcome everybody .
Yes , yeah , well , I wanted , I really wanted to drop everyone into the conversation . We took a half hour to do so , but I wanted everyone to get a sense of what is happening behind the scenes . I'm your host , coach Castleton . With me , as always , is coach Bishop .
I was slow to the mute button and that hurt my feeling .
That's good coach , thank you . And then , obviously , we have our boss , Emily Chambers .
Yeah , and I remembered having something to say here , and then a couple of men talked over me for like 30 solid minutes . So now it's gone , I'll think of it for next time and then I'll rub it in their faces . At that point also , we'll see how it goes .
Let's not get emotional here , boss .
Whoa Take it easy Take it easy .
there You're getting a little hysterical .
You better find your uterus and staple it in place , because you don't want to just float around your body . All weird like .
I literally never thought that . Oh wait , do you staple ?
Wait , but that's why they called it hysteria . Back in the ancient Greek days , your people , your people came up with that .
They thought that the uterus oh yeah , no , I know the reference .
Yeah , floats around the body and that's what would make women upset . Like they had to come up with an idea that there was an actual physical ailment for women having feelings about things and that was that our uterus , ease , eye , whatever would float around your body and fuck shit up . That's where hysterical comes from .
That's so fucking amazing .
Wow , true , they found out later . It was true , so fucking weird . You know Exactly .
And low and behold , and turns out .
Fucking .
I want to To quote my big fat Greek wedding and every real Greek American and every Greek Orthodox church everywhere . When my people were inventing philosophy , your people were still swinging in the trees .
Yes , yes , that's great .
Jokes on you . Ireland doesn't have any trees , we just have bogs . We were just laying out of the sun as much as possible .
Just uteruses floating around willy nilly . That is fascinating .
I have to say , my big fat Greek wedding I mean I'm not alone in the universe Loved it . I went to high school . I know people like where the fuck did this guy go to high school ? Like he's always saying the weirdest shit about where he was high school .
Yeah , you just make up everything . Yeah , yeah , yeah , you could fly .
I was in high school back in Paris , but no , in Brooklyn it's a real place , I promise you . And there were a lot of , as they say , ethnic whites . I think that's the phrase that people use when they're trying to figure out how to say but , but .
But it was super cool to me because it was a lot of the parents , like you're talking about , people who like still had the thick accent and were like so I felt like you really got a sense of these different cultures .
So , anyway , opa , like yelling it , like that was a thing that would happen on my football team , like jokingly , like it was like whatever , but still like I was fully aware . When they said Opa , I was part of the point oh , three , five percent of black people who fucking lost it In my big fat Greek wedding .
I laughed so goddamn loud and I know people were like what the fuck's happening ? But to me I was like oh , I was like being home again , anyway . But yeah , the third one's coming out . I'm not hopeful for it , but might go see it just for the moment .
Where he says I'm a vegetarian and the woman looks up at him without hesitation and says no , that is fucking funny , that is very . She just says no . Like what do you mean ?
No , we're not going to do it Exactly .
That's exactly right it was . It is the cultural equivalent of here's what we're not going to . Do the vegetarians like ? That's crazy ? Absolutely not , and I laugh so hard at the trailer for that I'm like . I am 85 percent confident this movie is going to be trash and I may still go see it , just so that I could just bask in .
I'm vegetarian , no , but it's just so goddamn funny to me .
Or you could just flat and spend 20 minutes with my mom .
Coach I you know it's funny . When we met I was like oh , yeah , yeah , yeah , this is . Yeah , I get the prop back some stuff .
Yeah , yeah , I felt comfortable , I felt totally comfortable .
I was like oh , I love this .
I , so I'm a big fan of yours . Lantimos , who is a Greek director , did the lobster , and you guys .
Oh , ok , oh , if you don't know . Oh , lobster , yeah , I know .
Boss , you saw the lobster right .
It does .
It has collin ferrule , so yes , OK , yeah , I'm a huge fan and I think he's fascinating and it's so nice to have a fascinating Greek director and . But I also wanted to make my real big fat Greek wedding . Ok , because this is like when I watch that , I'm like boss .
Watching the end of Ted Lasso , I'm like oh , so this is the Disney version of what actually , I want to see what really happens , like you want to know how it really looks like Really . Yeah , yeah .
Yeah , oh , that's funny . I'm like , oh god , this is so , it feels so vanilla . And it's funny because it's basically , they do a great job of pulling out all these crystal moments of like oh , that's so cute . Whatever You're like mm-hmm , you know what's behind that . You know , like the brother saying like I'll kill you , or something like that .
I'm like you know what he's actually thinking . Like you know what I mean .
Like ah , it's funny , yeah , yeah .
Yeah , or what happens when you actually my mom married a . My dad is not Greek , he was Swedish and Polish and American born . She was born in Greece and when she married him , they excommunicated her . She was excommunicated , she was kicked out .
Oh shit , like it's that the cutesy . Nobody listen to me . It's none of that , it's just like , seriously , you're out of here .
It was like you are not , you are going to hell . Yeah , Like that's as much . They're like oh , no , no , no , no , you're not , Couldn't get married in a Greek Orthodox Church . Then it took her a while to get , like you know , re-communicated , which is cool because , yeah , I don't know , it's nice , it's nice to hold that over people .
Wow , I missed my call . I missed my calling because I would love for my job to be deciding who goes to hell . I would love and then get paid for it . I'd be like that would be so good at that . Like no , no , you're going to hell . No , I believe me , I got to . I got to lie into the main guy and , trust me , you are you're back in .
Yeah , now you're You'd be like I'm Jade , going to talk to Derek about whether they can have the window table .
Or you'd be like I need to .
I got to go talk to . I got to go talk to God , I'll be right back .
That's it . I love Derek as God . Ok , so shall we , shall we ? Ted Lasso ? Yeah , you , yes , let's do it . We leave anything out and anyone have any .
Yeah , exactly , exactly . Actually , no bullshit . I'm going to throw this in . I don't want to actually discuss it now , we can discuss it sometime . But there's a documentary series I think it's about four episodes and we just started last night because we were hanging out and just like , oh , that looks interesting about chimps on Netflix .
It's like Chimp Kingdom or Chimp . This shit is like the dopest fucking HBO series ever . Like the central chimps got beef with the fucking West chimps . This shit is bananas . And like I'm really in it .
Like like one of the central chimps got caught by himself and got killed and I was telling my sister and my wife before we went to bed I was like they got to go get one of them . Like this is , you know , these are the rules . Like I was really on it or like some street level shit of . Like it was hilarious , but it was .
I was like , yes , see , I was like that chimp right there . That chimp is like stringer bell and that chimp is like fat pussy .
Remember when , in fact , oh , it's like really , it's excellently done and also narrated by Mahersha Ali , and I don't know like how many times you have the swoon at the sound of another man's voice before you got to throw that old cue into your introduction places . But I'm getting pretty close to either .
We're doing Orlando Bishop LBGTQ because Mahersha La say something else . That voice of his is something special . I would not let him within 3000 miles of my wife . Like if I found out he's coming to LA , I would fly her to New York and if he comes to New York , I just get her on a plane and fly back to LA because I wouldn't blame her .
Like if somehow I fucked that up and we found ourselves all in LAX , I'd be like babe , we had some great kids , we've had a great run , I get it . I love you . All right , take care , because he is just fucking drippy . Anyway , that's my version of not saying anything about something .
Yeah , it's good . I love that , but this is the thing we were welcoming people back from . They had a little sort of foray into Wayne .
We took a little detour .
And this is the type of thing , coach . We put this on the list and then let's just deep dive it and let's just go through it and add it to it , because it'll be excellent .
I got my kid . I'm serious . That's the thing we put .
There's so many , there's so many awesome things out there and I one of my favorite things is , you know , I love team building and I love talking things out , and coach called me before that we started recording . He's like , oh , I caught up with my cousin and , my God , this guy is so much fun to talk to .
It's so exciting when you talk to people with different , you know interesting views and can tell you something you haven't thought about or , you know , really open your eyes about something , and so part of what we really want to do here is , in deep diving to Atlassos , we try to shed some light on things they may or may not have thought about , and if you
may have thought of it , maybe we're giving you a different perspective and or maybe you can agree to disagree , and that's that's also part of the fun . But we have so many interesting things that we talk about , we just want to go and share them with everybody . On that note , ted Lassow , this is season three , episode 11 , part five Mom City .
¶ Video Games and Ted Lasso Discussion
I wonder if we'll get to the part where Boss is going to annihilate us , coach , but not today .
Not today . Yeah , thanks , I mean we're going to need a whole conversation on that . There are three scenes at the end of this episode that we are going to need to get into , because there's a lot , so a lot to be said .
I'll speak directly to the buttercups , because they're not privy to our text threads , and I will tell . I will be honest and open and tell you that I've already shared with Boss that I'm afraid I have neither the ammunition nor the skill to prevent her from gutting me . I'm so , I'm like I'm living in fear . So I just I'm like no , but I loved it .
You're going to ruin it , aren't you ? So we see , we'll see , we shall see .
I'm just going to pretend to be neutral and then watch you get gutted and slowly back away and not come to your , as you should .
I mean I get a certain point , Save yourself . I mean like is that right ?
No , what are we talking about ? Yeah , she's got a blood guy .
Yeah , I haven't needed him for a while for a lot of reasons . It doesn't matter why , but no , that is true .
How is not needing him more fucking ominous than needing him ? I don't know , but right now I am as scared of this woman as I've ever fucking been , because she has it because that means that she sits around and very calmly goes . Should I call them Well ? I don't need him for this one .
There's a thing in her mind where she ascertains whether or not that she needs a blood guy , right ?
this ? Because here's the thing Either it means I have no need for blood , and that's great , because that can only mean good things , or it means that my need was filled elsewhere .
That part .
Yeah , yeah .
There you go . All right , coach . I'm sorry , I'm going to behave for at least the next 30 seconds .
Last one , last thing I want to ask is not on topic , boss you ever play a video game where you have to romance somebody ? Have you ever done that ? Have you ever had that experience in a video game ?
I know you played the Witcher , yes , and you are , and they make it a little bit easier in some cases than in others . There is a case where you can try to romance two ladies at the same time and if you are successful in that , they get you naked , tie you to a bed and leave with all of your clothes .
So the fact that I'm not great at seduction is probably better for me in a lot of situations , because I would end up under a bridge , someplace like alive and moving , but just not in a great situation .
Yeah , yeah , I'm playing a game with one of my friends and I'm striking out trying to romance this awesome game . It's like so well written and I'm like , hey , you know , like whatever in the interactions and like so , what are you like , what are you up to , or whatever , and she's like I'm good .
And so in the back of my mind I'm carrying around this sense of shame that I can't romance this amazing fake digital .
No , that makes sense , because I was playing a game and I thought for sure that there was going to be a lot of seduction and romance involved , and portal had none of that and I didn't understand it whatsoever that they wouldn't go for that .
There's a little that's hysterical . That's if anyone who knows portal , that is a , did you play portal to by the ?
way , yeah , no , no , no . Portal two was the one that I did play .
I don't know if I remember one , but yeah , no , it was great . Stephen Merchant's really phenomenal . I wrote an article about it . It's so it's . It's literally phenomenal .
It's so great .
It's so good . You know what it's so good . What we might do is is it is like spectacular . It's great , it is hysteric . So we might do a watch at some point of the cut scenes . Oh sure , yeah , yeah , yeah , just so people go . Oh my God , this is really hilarious .
I also need to mention you can play two player , and so I was playing with the boyfriend and he was trying to map out .
For those unfamiliar with the game , you have a portal gun and you could use it to jump through a hole to move you someplace else , and the puzzles get more and more difficult over time , and so he was trying to game out how to do one move and he couldn't quite figure it out . So he's talking to himself , real quite .
He's like if I put this there and then I you move that there , and then I put it okay , yeah , I've got it All right , get in the bottomless pit . And I was like , well , I'm gonna do that , but I need everyone who is in this room right now to hear that you said get in the bottomless pit .
Wow , not even a please .
Right right .
She likes it Get in the bottomless pit . She says she likes getting kicked around . I think it's great . I think it would end my relationship with Juliana if we tried to play portal together .
It was the way we just like functionally understand space is so different , especially like when you have to like jump through a portal and then , on a freefall , shoot another portal for them to be launched into .
Like it's all a timing thing and I get , I get test , I get a little testy , I'll get I'll be , right , it's a weird thing , yeah , it's a weird thing that comes and also I do my strategy in my head .
So I've been playing with our , with our good friend coach , you know , you know we play with and he likes to talk out all his moves Okay , it will run a turn based game and he goes , Okay . So I was thinking like this might be a dexterity role , but maybe it's charisma . What do you ? I'm like oh , Mike , just hit the . I'm aging .
I am , oh my God , like there's so much wrong with us . What is going on I am aging you guys is trying to figure out like , hey , you know , like , let's make sure we've communicated .
I mean he's trying to be a good communicator .
I don't .
Whatever you do , I'm just gonna launch a fireball and blow up everything inside , so I don't do your worst . Okay , ted Lasso , let's jump in . We picked where we left .
Last time was this you know easily , the best actor on Ted Lasso , derek trying to push fish , talking about Nate's trajectory , which is , you know , the way everybody wants to do it in a capitalist society . And we open with a knock on Jamie Tarstor .
He is , he is at the Hacienda Hotel in Manchester and he's got his suitcase on the bed , which is a no , no , according to Donnie Lasso . And then , yeah , he's just transferring bacteria from the floor right onto his comforter , but if you've watched any of those 2020 documentaries on what really is on your hotel comforter ?
yes , just in case you should be worried about it .
Yeah , it's like holy crap , it's , it's , it's pretty gross . So , yeah , boss , when you pick it up here , he opens the door . And who is ? Who is Stanley ?
Of course it's keely , recently drafted into making Jamie better by Roy Keely . And she says can I come in ? And he says yeah , sure , of course said I wanted to come and see how you're doing . And he immediately says Roy told you , like , just without skipping a beat , he knows exactly what's going on . She says well , he's worried about you , is that okay ?
He's like yeah , yeah , it's fine , I'm fine , I'm good , I'm great . In fact I'm the best I've ever been , you know .
And then he says oh wait , you know what , boss ? I want to jump in really quickly . It was this moment where he sorry , I just thought about this , I have it in the notes where he opens the door to his hotel room . They have been intimate together . The two of them are for a real thing .
And we get the sense of real good . I thought about this too , I think real hot yeah .
And then he opens the door and he's she's like can I come in ? And like no part of him because of where it is like hotel is Pavlovian Nope . Yeah , yeah , no , like nothing like he's almost like unreachable on an attraction level , and so I just want to chart that . Okay , go ahead boss .
No , that's actually an excellent point . I feel like there are only so many people that you could have in a hotel room with you alone , where it wouldn't at least be a hint of a weird thing Like family members , anything after that you're like you're strolling into weird , like oh , the pizza delivery guys here territory .
Oh , wow , wow , that's really funny . That's really fucking weird and funny . You scare me .
So when I go , for it .
I yeah , no , I would invite everyone . I love making things awkward , so I would love to invite all of you to visit me in hotel room and I'll just like , I'll just stand there and make it a super awkward . This is why this is a thing . Remember when Ola said like he made he intentionally made it awkward with .
Yes .
Yes , yeah , yeah With with record , and it's not funny to some people , but if you're the person and you're a student of humans and you're like yeah , come , come here , Like yeah .
¶ Humor, Anxiety, Basketball - Hilarious Conversation
Oh my God , no , I get that humor , but it is torture to me . Yeah , Like I . I right now am stuck and definitely so frustrated with me because platonic is just cringe . I'm like the cringe has cringe in that fucking show . And it is it's a , it's a torture device for me , Like I'm like I can't do this , Like this is too much cringe .
I like the whole time I'm like , oh God , no , you did do that . Oh God , oh God , oh , it's like so anyway , I yes , I 100% hear you .
And coach , when I was , when I started out and stand up , coach and I worked on , because everything either one of us does so we were working together and coach encouraged me this one maybe still makes me laugh to this day because I was like I'll never do this , Although I understand why . It was very funny .
He was like you should just do things and see how people react . You should go into a coffee shop and just like have a bunch of change in your hand and then just like when people can't like no one would notice , like just throw it out on the floor and just let it like , make all the like and then just see what people do .
What I was like . I'm a student of nature . Yeah , human nature . What happens ?
Yeah , I'm going to go home and learn how to craft the joke . I don't know what's happening right now , but I do it . So he was like God in the world to make chaos .
Let's see what happened so yeah , yeah , yeah , I love it , I love it .
That's hysterical yeah .
Go ahead , keep going .
Yeah . So as soon as Jamie says , oh , he's fine , he's totally fine , he's better than he's ever been , it's just there's something so sad about a suitcase . You know what I mean . It's like a drawer without a home .
Oh , my God .
Obviously the words of somebody that's doing very well . I would like to point out that this is slightly different from me categorizing a slug as an unhoused snail . I feel like some analogies make sense , even if they're a little sad , and this one is just a gateway into his soul . So she says Jamie , look at me , you've got a lot going on right now .
There's a lot going on . This is the first time you've played back since you left . It's played back home since you left . So , wanting to address the fact that he is back at his old team and that there's going to be some apprehension about that , because sometimes there's a former player comes back and the crowd fucking loves it .
And sometimes they come back and they're like you have never been alive to us . It's not that you're dead now it's that we have erased everything you ever meant to us , and it's better when it's that first one . It's way , way easier for everybody involved .
Yeah , this is Kyrie in Boston , kyrie Irving . Sorry I was going to make a very everybody knows my joke reference , but Kyrie Irving is an American basketball player who is a walking nightmare and we realize welcome everywhere he goes .
And the people of Boston hate him so much that there was a chant at a Boston Red Sox game and for those of you are confused , that's a different sport . That's how much this is . There's a different fucking sport where they broke out in a chant of fuck Kyrie .
So that's the level of hatred that that James did about roundabout that Jamie is walking into in this game .
Our hate does travel . Yeah , it'll migrate sport to sport . It's one thing we're good at in Boston . Yeah , boss , I wanted to call out Jamie's face after the , the very sort of when he talks about how the drawer is by itself and he just sits there with his mouth open like thinking about it . I was like watching like a robot go on tilt .
We're like , is he , did he just break , is that ? And then you know it's , uh , kili's . Of course , coach always talks about what a great coach she is . She's got her soft voice and Jamie , like you know it's , you know she's sort of trying to redirect , but it's Phil Dunster man , oh my God , so good .
He does , in fact it's . It's a hard move to pull off , where you are learning the thing that somebody already wrote in the script that you've practiced and read before , and he does do a very good job of conveying that . So , as always , jamie Tart , somehow wonderful . I don't know how they did it .
Amazing , amazing . And also you brightly point out Kili , saying it's the first time that you're playing at home since you left . Yeah .
And the next part . I have to admit , when I first watched it I couldn't figure out . Is this reverse psychology or what's happening here ? What Kili says is uh the crowd's going to hate you and the person who's going to be booing the loudest in the crowd is your dad . And he says oh yeah , I didn't think of that .
And she said and I know a lot of people are shit talking your hair online .
If they're what ?
No , no , no , think about it . If you guys win tomorrow , then you'll be on the precipice of achieving everything you've ever dreamed of . And he goes oh my God , oh shit , oh sorry , jamie , oh , it's like just making it worse . I think that maybe she was trying to acknowledge the situation .
And he's like exactly .
My dad's going to be there yelling at me . Like shit .
I don't even think I don't like my hair . Yeah , yeah , he just falls , literally falls over under the bed .
Yeah , but I also thought it was amazing . Like the only thing worse than how bad this could go is that it might go right . Like like he's he's done . He's in that space of life where you hear that you might win the lottery and your first thought is I'm going to get killed on the taxes . Like he's just done , Like he is finished . So yeah , this was .
But the fact that the hair , his relationship to his hair , continues to give us , as funny as it is , a legitimate sense of where he is . Like he says I wash my hair but I don't even use conditioner . Yeah , we may all laugh , but there was part of me was like , oh , this motherfucker is falling apart . Like this is not good .
Yep , yep . Then there's those of us who don't have that much hair , and we go haha . That's funny .
Would I could trade my legs for your scalp , sir . I feel like that would be the solution to everybody's problem .
Yeah , wouldn't that be great , listen , if I could just look at my face and just switch it over . Yeah , I got a great . My personality is like 86% beard , so I don't know why it wants to migrate onto my . Yeah , I mean , it's all .
I got Although I have to fully admit on the L the way home the other day from work . Just a guy , regular guy , on the train with a beard and a forearm tattoo reading Nick Hornby , and I thought to myself I don't want to hit on him , I don't want to , but I am compelled that I need to do something . I can't not .
It is the uniform of the man I find attractive . I don't know what to do with myself .
Wait , it was a Nick Hornby quote book he had a book oh he had a book . Oh , I'm sorry , I thought that . I thought that was a .
Nick , so he was reading Nick Hornby he had a beard .
He looked like maybe hadn't showered in a few days and maybe ruined your car .
That's what I was going to say . It's like , sir Perchance , do you spend it responsibly ? Yeah , like .
are you taking the L because you're concerned with the environment or because you cannot drive legally anymore ? Which one are we talking about ? Wow ?
That's great , that's so great Hi .
I'm sorry , I'm Emily Hep A , b or C , just curious .
That's the multiple tourist quiz you did not know you were going to take today . Yeah , you're not aware . Yeah , yeah , so that the scene does end with him falling over and her saying , oh shit , I've made it worse .
And then we got yeah , which is what Roy did . Yeah , right , I mean , this is like it's really hard to sort of interject yourself into somebody else's dread or somebody else's
¶ Parenting Kids With Anxiety and Relationships
especially . Anxiety Is a real tough one for me because I feel like I've I think I probably grew up with a lot of anxiety . I turned it into other things , I turned it into certain types of preparation , I turned it into humor , I turned it whatever to cope without , because I had no help .
So I just figured out how to make it be other things maybe , which is probably very unhealthy . But with four children , all of whom have different levels of anxiety , some of them are just debilitating , crippling anxiety .
And I know I'm speaking to all of our listeners because when we sent out that questionnaire about anxiety , it was like , oh , I put in a category like brother , you don't even want to know , like that was like I said like what level of anxiety do you feel ? And it was like a preposterous amount of people picked like the fake one .
I was like it's just , I can't even you know . So I know that trying to parent kids with anxiety and try to like you know , you try to rationalize it , oh , there's no reason for that . You know you're talking about instincts . You're talking about flight instincts that are , you know , hardwired into the system .
Or you know fight , flight freeze , and so you go okay , yeah , but you don't need to worry about that , you're gonna get math and even if you do poorly on the test , I don't care , like nope , doesn't . Yeah , it's amazing .
Remember that coach where I said the funniest thing , my little boy saying that helicopter , you know , I'm sure it's going to crash and hit us . And then , when I didn't , I said to him he was like six years old , we're on a beach in in in LA . And I said , now that it didn't hit us , do you feel better ? He's like nope .
And coach like yeah , fuck , no , of course you don't feel better , yeah , no it's either doesn't work like that's going to crash somewhere else and that's something else is going to crash into us . So yeah , just just when we all relax and think we're safe from the helicopters , that's when the shit's really going to go down . Yeah , there's no .
When you're where JB is now , like there's no , like you need a major interrupt , like there's no , you can't just talk yourself out of that . But he's in , he is all the way in there .
Did I when we talked about that earlier , about the helicopter in your son ? Did I mention the Jonathan Saffron four line about suffering ? Do you guys remember this ? It's from extremely loud and incredibly close , which is the book about 9 11 . Interestingly enough , because we're recording on 9 11 .
And the line is I might be butchering this a little bit , but essentially the end of the suffering doesn't justify the suffering , so the suffering never ends . So it's like just removing the bad part doesn't mean that it wasn't bad at some point , so you actually need to like rectify the bad part in order to get rid of it .
And that's what a lot of anxiety like it was anxiety provoking . So it's there . It doesn't matter if it's done now , it's . No , I'm anxious . Like what do you want me to ?
do .
Yeah , there's stuff out there . Do you guys know about how there's stuff out there ? Yeah , so it's hard .
Right , the human mind is so crazy , so I had to take my son to a physical this morning . Went to physical and I said hey , you want to grab a vagal at this local place he's never been there before , just as a little treat before taking back to school . And so get this bagel . And there's , there's a little poster on the bulletin board there and it's .
This guy took it , was , he had a QR code and it said Okay , it's a one man show and it's called grief . And it says Okay , and I don't know how to justify what this does in my mind . My number one fear is losing a child . That is my number one .
That is horrific .
Yeah , that is my every single day . The motor inside me , everything that makes me go , it worries about that in every possible way , and so on this poster it says foundation is proud to host the exclusive Boston area performance of grief , the award winning emotional show played in New York and Los Angeles .
Blah blah After a drunk driver killed both his teenage children . This channel shot anguish and rage into this tragic comic exploration of our culture's inability to talk about grief . Comedic and heartbreaking , profound and profane . This is a feel bad show of the year , and so in a QR code on it and I was like . I was like , okay , I took a picture .
I was like Do ?
you say profan and profane . Was that that ? Was that the combination of words ? Profound and profane ? Just . Yes , that's what it says Finish , finish your point , and then I I'll bring us back to that . I kind of that kind of yeah , anyway , that stuck out for me . So then I kind of lost a little bit of what you were .
Yeah , comedic and heartbreaking , profound and profane . This is the feel bad show of the year .
And .
I was like I think , now that I've seen it like I have to go attend this or something about it's gonna happen , like it's like wait what , what is it ?
I'm like no , no no , no , right , right , no . Oh , believe me , I know it's like I'm like Eli Manning I'm a little stishes . I'm not superstitious , but I'm a little stishes , I get it .
I love Eli . Yeah , that's great . So anyway , it was weird . I don't know why we're thinking about that . Where did this come up ? I don't know what I was referring to .
Anxiety change , anxiety that he hadn't thought of it before .
And yeah , yeah , and I just , I guess it's like you know what , the what ? I don't know , I don't know where the origin of these types of thoughts are . I don't know . It doesn't feel like that . It feels like almost like sports betting , like we were talking about , or it's like you have no the universe , you know whatever .
And then I have a son who's a philosopher and he'll talk about , you know , predestination and you know whether we have any influence whatsoever on it . You know the way things go and , yeah , the whole thing is just , oh God , it's overwhelming , which is why we take solace in watching it happen to Jamie and then talking about it in the podcast .
Yeah , we open on the team watching a movie . It's movie night for the team . Once you have a pillow fight , you'll never have a movie night again , but yet but yet , oh you're right , Right . I mean it's not realistic to have pillow fights all the time . Sometimes you just got to got to chill out coach . Yeah , keely Keely reports that she made it worse .
Daniel Rojas turns around Hello Roy and Keely , good to see you both next to each other , like before . And Keely Keely is the one who leans forward and corrects him . And what does she say , boss ?
No , we're just sitting together as friends , but Roy mentions yeah , and she just looks very nice .
Yeah , I mean , they're misaligned right now and then you know . So , like the whole , the whole repair Jamie thing is misaligned . It's a real mess , which I will say as a as someone who enjoys this show . I'm like unnecessary . I want to yell just like no , like everybody alone , like we already got them where they needed to be .
I don't think I needed this beat . But okay , coach , you're going to say something ? Yeah .
I well , sort of in what they did decide to do . What just struck me is you can't always decide what a relationship is , which seems like well , that's ridiculous . You have to make the but like sometimes you can't .
Like sometimes a relationship has a certain tenor , or there is or isn't a certain attraction , or there is like whatever elements of it , and we can try to decide like as friends , right , as friends , yeah , of course , as friends , and like you , just you watch enough of the as friends back and forth and go , oh my God , like one of them may get hurt in the
ripping of the clothing . I mean , like are you kidding ? And I'm not saying that's where we are right here , but just both of them Keely having this real commitment that she's going to take this relationship . There's a piece of it that she likes because he's a great guy and she's going to hold on to just that piece and he still wants to bed her down .
And so just insisting that , like if we say it enough times or if we decide that's how it is , that's not always how that works , like I'm not saying men and women can't be friends , but I am saying if one of them can't wait to get the other one in bed . That's going to be tough .
Right , yeah , it's not that men and women can't be friends , it's that it's more difficult to be friends with somebody you want to sleep with .
I'm not saying that can happen either .
There are actually plenty . I have known couples who are friends and attracted to each other and they worked out just fine . But if one of you wants something more and the other one doesn't , that's when it's going to be a problem , regardless of what that something more is .
If you want somebody to be a closer friend and they're like well , actually I'm okay with once every six months , we're being honest , like that's going to be an issue also .
A question
¶ Conversation About Relationships
. On our internal message boards for the antagonist , I noticed that , boss , you invited the entire staff to hang out at your apartment and do drugs . Yeah , except for me , wait wait , wait , wait , wait wait . You said that they called out .
You were like so is that because I'm always trying to hang more and you're trying to put up a boundary like , oh no , I don't want to hang out with you any more than I have to on this terrible , terrible podcast .
Oh God , no sorry . Was that what you thought ? Oh no , I'm so sorry . No , no , no , no , no , no , no .
I was like oh , why can't I leave my four kids and go do drugs ?
I'm so glad I feel like . I really feel your feelings , and it's not , it's been haunting me , no , it's not that I don't want to hang out with you . It's that nobody wants to hang out with you , and if I invite you , I love you .
Oh , okay , that's better .
Nobody else will show up .
Okay , for a second there . You know what it's like . It's like I'm Nikolai , I'm like Russia . Yeah , from the Akufo meeting .
Actually sorry , we can't do this , if we're here . It's going to be weird . You're the boss , come on .
Okay , fine , I get it . Yeah , no , do drugs with you then yeah , no , no , no , no . All right , it's fine . Okay , all right .
Oh , thanks for clarifying that I appreciate it , of course , any time .
Okay . So we have this moment where , yeah , she looks , and she just looks very nice . They shush everybody . Beard says Nora Efron , I'm saying my apology . Who Keely says , and he says Carl Bernstein's ex . I was like wait , what that's how people think of Nora Efron . Do you think of her as Carl Bernstein ?
I was like that's reductive . I've never thought that way , but I'm like Nora .
Efron is .
Nora Efron . Oh , yeah , no .
She has a statue . She doesn't need to be buried next to that , especially because Carl Bernstein didn't even buried like three times .
Yeah , he cheated on her , and that's when she wrote what was it ? Hartburn or Antony Afterburn ? Something burn .
I did not know . I did not know that .
God , you're great with gossip , sure am man and drugs , drugs , yeah . But I'm like Nora Efron has a statue , like she doesn't have to . You know what I mean ? You don't ? Anyway , she stands alone . The cheese stands alone . Isn't that the thing ? The cheese stands alone , yeah , the cheese . Isn't that a poem ?
Yeah , it's the nursery rhyme .
The nursery rhyme or a little kids book . The nursery rhyme yeah , nora Efron stands alone . Anyway , don't cry , shop girl , don't cry . We pan across the guys crying . I wanted it to be you . Meg Ryan says God , meg Ryan , she can sell that .
Yeah , no , no , like what it was like to grow up with Meg Ryan Like no other .
Yeah , amazing , we get through this beautiful beat , we get young Tom Hanks and then , you know , we get a nice sort of dolly move across the front of the whole team and then sort of shot from the back and silhouette and everybody's like , everybody's into it . Isaac is like a little crazy . I'm like does he have like some kind of like anger or whatever ?
You know , I'm like why is Isaac so fired up during this one beat ?
And then what did you guys make of Sam ? Hold on , I want to go back to Isaac for a second . Yeah , what I maybe , and this , this could be me imposing it .
I'm recognizing , as you ask the question , I took it as emotions are uncomfortable and I'm feeling things , and I know that it's okay that I'm feeling things , but that doesn't mean I'm comfortable and I think , and I think I'm the kind of person who generally , before this moment in my life , if I felt uncomfortable enough , I stood up and threw a chair and so
like , but you guys are making me sit in the chair and in the feelings and it's a lot Like that's . That was my experience of that moment . Now , whether that is any of what was intended and as they were doing this , I don't know , but that was the way I took .
It is like Isaac learning what it's like to feel overwhelmed by sadness or the beauty of something or the you know , the awesome power of love or like . These are just not things that come up a lot when you're hanging out playing FIFA .
Yeah , no , that is true , I mean , they do when you , when you get there , they do sometimes well , really win it when a tight one on FIFA or lose the title . I make a beautiful play .
I think that that's how like , like an extension of that Travis Kelsey SNL skit . That should be like when you know you have a , you have a couple , and maybe they're not man , woman , but maybe the man . But at any rate , to explain it to the darkheads like us , it'd be like no , no , no , you're not understanding .
When you didn't do the dishes , it was like JK Dobbins tearing as Achilles , and you're like did I do that to you ?
Oh , yeah , yeah , how to speak ? Yeah , yeah , you're gonna understand . Like , yeah , like and .
I'm like totally not getting something . And you come running in and you're like it's like Georgetown losing the Villanova in 85 . And I'm like , oh my God , you feel that , yeah . So , but yeah , he was having a hard time .
Yeah , I think he's a . He's a character , but I was gonna ask you guys what you made of Sam turning around to Rebecca in that moment . I wanted it to be you and they share like a really sweet . I like that a lot .
Like , if there's something .
Really . I'm like what other show do you have , like a resolution of a really hot and heavy relationship , and then it , and then they end up like being this sort of lovely to each other , what , what ?
Where have we seen that boss , boss , boss , who has seen most shows , trying to think of a show where Um , that is a good question , one that I would need a second to think about .
So I'm trying to think of the , the relationships that I have been very invested in . This might shock you guys . They tend not to end very well . There's usually at least one death . I'm thinking , um , yeah , no .
Actually , now that I'm thinking about my favorite ones , either they just break up and it's not great , or although maybe my favorite literary romance of all time is the TV show version of Laura Moon and Matt Sweeney , and she started it dead , so I don't know if that's really going to count .
That doesn't make I'm sorry I asked , boss . I know I was thinking .
I was like thinking that what you usually see is like Sam and Diane on Cheers , like you see , like these things where it's like the guy gets immature and sophomoric and kind of pokes fun at the X or whatever and like brings up fights they had in context or she alludes to his failed machismo or something .
You know , suddenly don't .
It's like it's all , it's like a little bit . It's a little bit like like not aggressive , but a little bit sort of poking fun at the other shortcomings from that person's perspective . But like when do we see ? Yeah , no , we're cool , we brought , we had our thing , and like we really fucking dig each other , like we really want each other to be happy .
That's , that seems it's . Maybe . Maybe it's not utterly unique if we really put our minds to it , but it is rare .
Well , I am sure at some point in these conversations I've shared that I was . I was taught at one point that relationships go how they start , which is one of those like probably not 100% , but definitely true enough for us to proceed with the conversation kind of a deal and , I think , in an interesting way because of how their relationship start .
Their relationship started with the element that remains . The relationship started with you like Ratatouille , you're a grown man who's willing to say you , like Ratatouille , you get my references , you're that are right , like I can't wait to see what witty thing you'll say next . Oh , I'm a spy , like that , all that stuff that like usually it's .
I thought you had a cute butt and so then I started talking to you so I could get to touch it and then I found out there was like a whole personality connected to that cute but that I liked .
But they didn't do it that way and I wonder if , in a storytelling way , but maybe also in a human way , that allows for this landing spot , because what first brought me to you wasn't that anyway , that was like a I don't say like a cherry on top . I mean , they want a dating app . I don't get carried away here .
But I think it was like I think that's part of it is that they know they are still the two people who had that dinner and just laughed and laughed and smiled and hadn't neither of them had as good a time as that since God knows when .
Yeah , actually . So I probably will need to think about it a little bit more , but I like that aspect to the relationships I did think about
¶ Ending Relationships, Maintaining Affection
. That ended with a similar feeling of affection , at least , if nothing else , on community . Jeff and Britta end up not dating , but they do hook up for a little bit their friends and then they have sex and then their friends again . By the end . There the group is so close that they really want the best for everyone and there's a shared affection there .
And then you're the worst .
Two of the worst people , edgar and Lindsay , do the same thing where they're friends and then they hook up and then at the end they actually like , have a conversation where they're like oh well , we need to move on because other things need to happen to us , but we're still friends and we still would like to be in each other's lives .
So I think that there is something about like not that meeting somebody and immediately wanting to bone down is bad . I will never say that . That it goes against my core beliefs . But there is something that when the affection is developed , it usually stays , unless something really bad happens during the relationship .
You can fall back into that place where you're nice to each other .
Yeah , I feel like I've seen versions of this on shows , but it always feels unsatisfying to me .
Now , like and I can go through this like the whole , like I would say I'd categorize it like a whole , maybe it's because the shows feel like they have more of a millennial mindset , which can sometimes feel like oh , not exactly like , like aligned with my experiences of dating or you know , like it's definitely a different sort of take on it , much more cynical
and much more jaded and much more realistic , I think , probably , and so you know , probably much more mature than the way I did when I was at that , at that age .
And so sometimes , when they have these things , it almost feels like like a resolution to a relationship , can feel like , I don't know , I guess , very real , but also , yeah , I guess , unsatisfying . I look at it and they go , oh God , something feels missing from this .
Maybe it's like , I don't know , maybe it's drama , maybe it's like a big sense of closure rather than a declared closure , I don't know , I don't know what it is , but sometimes , like when I watch those some of the you know sort of shows that will address this in the modern era , I go , oh God , this , what am I missing ?
Why does it feel so not like relatable ?
Yeah , no , actually , so I can't remember where I read this , but basically the idea was older , more elder millennials , of which I am one , are , in a lot of cases , the first generation that saw their parents actively divorcing in ways that could either be horrible although not as horrible as a previous generation because of the you know legal status around getting
divorced like it would have to be really fucking bad to branch a divorce just a few years before I was born , and once that became more common , we saw different versions of . This is how you end a relationship , even when it's a long , dedicated , important relationship .
You could sort of figure out how to do it in a way that is not toxic to everybody involved , and so I mean sorry good . No , just so that it like not me , I'm so kind of fucked up and all my exes had to move to another continent . But a lot of people my age do have better coping skills with . We loved each other .
We can break up and still not have to hate each other in order to move past that relationship .
One of the things I and I think I share this , but one of the things that I love most we develop the line relationships to talk to you about , and one of the things that I loved most is that , naturally , like it wasn't trying to you know this as we were talking through the development of this engagement , us , just us saying but what if they decide not to
be together ?
But that it doesn't have like the mature or the correct decision for everyone involved could be , yeah , no , we're not going to the same place , and so we have a whole element of the work that's about like this is the fork in the road moment in our process , and then there's a whole conscious , uncoupling path that we created and it's one of the things that
we've not ever delivered it yet . And we'll see how it all goes in real life .
And you know , for all I know , somebody tries to run to my over car and I'm good , yeah , well , all right , but I think that there's something cool about going into the world with that in mind , that we could do this a way that leaves us both feeling , you know , whole and able to appreciate that was fun , right , like whatever it was , if it was three weeks
, or it was six months or it's a few years . Whatever it was , that was fun . I never would have learned about , you know , kung Fu Theater if we hadn't met . That was sweet and yeah , I'll never , whatever , I'll never hear such and such a song without thinking of you Doesn't mean I want to marry you . Doesn't mean I even want you around my house anymore .
But take care , yeah , I always think it's weird that people , anybody who's like all their exes , are the worst people like the
¶ Discussion on Relationships and Movie Preferences
. That is the list of the worst people who've ever lived . I find them scary . Like what is it about you and relationships ? That means like that's how it's got , that's how it's got to go , and I thought it could go that way . Yeah , boss , it could go that way . But you know you listen , the blood guy wasn't alone in scaring me .
When you started talking to people with other continents , I was like do not cross this woman .
Yeah , no , you think I'm worried about being scary . Come on , it's my whole thing . It's my whole thing . And also , again to clarify , I did not have a lot of boyfriends when I was younger . This is like I had one serious boyfriend before my other serious relationship .
These are just dudes that , like I hooked up with for a few months and then they decided they loved Japan . I don't know , that's on them . Maybe I had a weird thing for a little bit .
I feel I do . I will say , and I don't know where the movie goes from there , but I feel like if I were sort of stumbling through you know Netflix previews or whatever , and I saw a conversation , I was like the last six guys I dated moved to Japan . This is a non-zero chance . I'm pressing play and I'm just going .
This Saturday is fucked because I gotta understand what's going on . Like what All ? The boyfriend moved to Japan . Like that's very specific . It's not moved out of the state , it's not even moved to different continents . It's not like this one moved to Brazil . Like everyone to Japan .
Yeah , I did . Slash do have a thing for engineers , and I'm not sure what the correlation between Japan and engineering is , but there's got to be something there , okay . Okay , I don't know , can't explain it .
Yeah , I don't know . I was curious about what you know . When you I always say one of the big kiss of death when you're making a show or movie or you know some stage play , whatever , when you're producing a piece of entertainment and you're , you have your actors laugh but it's not funny and so the audience doesn't laugh .
It's like the kiss of death and so I had a beat in this moment I don't care about . You've got mail and I seem to remember it . I'm wondering , oh God , what is that phenomenon , boss , where you remember like a collective , shared delusion ? Do you remember this whole thing about ?
You've got mail , like I remember it ending a certain way , oh and , and then I guess it didn't end that way . But , like me and thousands of other people remember this one scene and then people do research about it and they go yeah , no , it didn't end that way .
But I swear to .
God , like I would put my hand on a Bible and swear that it feels like we're like that feels like days , the deja vu and the matrix where , like someone has changed the program because I swear to God and I'm not alone . Yeah , it's all these crazy groups that do these things and what you know . When do they turn up ?
But when Harry Met Sally is my Noura Afron sort of sort of thing . I really enjoyed that . But you got Mail and Signal saddle were not my , my jam .
So when everyone was tearing , up to it . I was like oh really , I , really , I it's well . I thought it was funny . I don't know if we did this line before we started the conversation . This part of the conversation I mean sleep is in Seattle is still a far superior film , ted says , and that made me laugh because it is , it is , it is .
I feel like people feel compelled . You can talk about when Harry Met Sally and not discuss other Noura Afron films . And you can talk about sleep is in Seattle and not discuss other Noura Afron films .
And I feel like if you bring up you've got mail , like it is contractually , it's like if you're a DJ and you're in a neutral kind of place and you play biggie , you got to play some two-part . Them's the rules . So if you're going to play one , you're going to play the other . That's how it goes .
And it feels like if you discuss you've got mail , you must address your feelings about where it belongs in the Noura Afron Canon , do not pass go , do not collect it . So that it
¶ Analysis of "You've Got Mail" and Rom-Coms
made me laugh . On that kind of like cultural whatever I will say of them , you've got mail is my least favorite . It doesn't mean it's bad , it's just like I . For me , when Harry Met Sally is just like otherworldly , like that's , just like don't even bother , don't even bother trying to write anything like that . And sleep is in Seattle was great .
And then you got mail . Kind of felt like it felt . You know , it felt like a little bit . To me was like watching a great athlete like a year or two past their prime , whether you still sort of see like what was so awesome but it's not what was like breathtaking version .
Yeah , I get that . I thought I thought some part of it was like I got to go watch . You got mail again . I was like oh , is this ? Like it felt like sort of based in the AOL type of like you've got mail , was like a big yeah , yeah , yeah , and I didn't like that at all .
Yeah , that was .
And then I didn't like , and then I was like it's like didn't the corporate guy when , cool , cool when , and I'm like yeah , oh yeah , humanized , like like I was like , okay , all right , that's actually worth it .
I'll just reach it . There's a hmm I'll say this out loud , since we're sort of been playing with ideas of like what are these conversations we're going to have ? I think there's a version of the world where we actually do watch one or more nor are fun movies and and and have some pretty interesting conversations .
But I I thought I thought it was an interesting choice .
I wouldn't say that it ultimately hit me in my gut , but everything I liked about that choice of the corporate guy not just being the bad guy , which is usually what we do , right , it's the corporate guy like in the you know you would do , you know her , her , her old high school friend from the town in Iowa , comes through you know it says like why don't
you come back home and be on a back mottractor ? And she's like you're right , that's where the real living happens . I kind of liked that they went the other way , but it didn't . But you still got it in the end . You got to hit me in the gut and you didn't , and so it just became like .
It became like an interesting exercise as opposed to like the kind of film choice that makes you want to watch something over and over again , like I would never be flipping through channels , see that you've got mail is on and be like , well , the next hour shot .
Whereas , like when Harry Met Sally , like I hope I hope you are not waiting for me when I bump into when Harry Met Sally because you are going to be disappointed .
But you don't like as a real question of boss . You have good , you asked your question first . What are you going ?
to say about oh , I was going to say you're referring to the Mandela effect where you remember , collectively we remember
something that didn't happen . That's right . Yes , that's it .
Apparently it was . The movie ends with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan being in love and walking off out of the park or whatever it is . Apparently , a lot of people remembered a follow up scene in her bookshop where she's reading to children . Never happened , yes , didn't happen Not a director's , I remember it . No , it didn't happen .
It might have happened earlier in the movie , but didn't happen . Also , yeah , no , you've got mail . Feels like a weird one , especially it's a remake of Shopper on the Corner , which was , I believe , from the 40s ish . Right right and I think it would be really interesting . This was like the heyday of people finding out how the internet works .
So this was , after Sandra Bullock's , the Net , where everyone was afraid that they would erase your entire life and murder you if they got your email address when people were still figuring out what this was .
There's an element where the corporate bookstore owner who was intentionally trying to put the smaller bookshop out of business catfish is the owner of said business into being into a in a relationship with him and doesn't reveal until the end who he is . And we are supposed to root for this guy .
We're like great , yeah , wonderful , and you're going to get your bookshop and New York is going to be a little bit blander . Congratulations , everett .
Yeah , yes . What are we root ? What is the lesson from this ? Yeah , no , I . Whatever . It does not surprise me , it's not lost . First of all , coach , I was going to react to the fact that you said if I'm flipping through channels and then I come across this , blah , blah , blah . I never flipped .
I never flipped through a channel .
No channels Like you mean those things ? They ?
list on Hulu like to make us all .
Yeah .
Misty All right .
Good , no , no , no , no , no , no . I literally never flipped . I was running with it . How many years has it been since ?
you flipped through channels . Oh my God , ten , I would think .
I would have to really sit and think about it . But yeah it's been , yeah it's been .
I mean yeah , I'd go into different apps .
I was going to say because of the rom comedy and all the rom communism and everything , is it lost on me that they feature ? You've got mail in a writing room where they talk about how hallmark movies are kind of great but also kind of suck .
But also kind of great but also like I don't have that gene whatever , like I've seen those and I think they just suck . I don't think they're kind of great . I don't love like . I love when you say like , oh , come back to the farm and , you know , go dating on farmers only . I'm like okay , whatever .
In my mind there's beauty all over the place and it doesn't have to be like city girl goes to the farm . There doesn't have to be a fish out of water story to make it awesome . Someone on the farm can follow someone on the farm and they can have a great fucking time on the farm and someone in the city can stay in the city and also a great time .
It doesn't have to be like these wild sort of parabolic shifts . But yeah , you know , it makes sense in the course of Ted Lasso to have this be the show that apparently makes Higgins like loses fucking , my like sobbing , sobbing , like he's at a funeral . I'm like , okay , maybe All right . Ted gets up and says all right , now listen up , you big softies .
10 pm , lights out and get some beauty sleep for tomorrow's big meat . Cute with my and Sid here and they all say whoo , this is all right . Efron on three . One , two , three , oh , efron , I'm all for that . Oh , yeah , and I was a woman writer's name .
Yeah , let's do more of that .
Yeah , I like that . They highlighted her and she's super talented and deserves all the credit she gets . So this is wonderful for that kind of call out . Then there's a bunch of people we over here talking about different things . You got to see sleepers in Seattle . That's what people are saying and what happens ?
I mean Keely , and Roy has a tear down his face , which I'm like okay , like all right . I mean like okay , he's like . Yeah , I guess . I mean this is the guy . Could I have some more Rosé please , janet , you know . So I'm like okay , he's not . It's not like he's not in touch with this .
I was like , but he doesn't usually let himself be in touch with it here .
I think that's significant , though I think that's deeply significant , Like he had like . Okay , I'm going to pause before I do even worse than comparing being gay to being a .
Denver Broncos .
Denver Broncos yeah , I started to launch into it and I was like whoa , whoa , pump the brakes , brother . So let me first say , yeah , I get it perspective , but in an interesting way . He too was not .
I mean not in a way , he too was living a double life Like he was , and he too is experiencing his two , I would more so say selves and lives Like I don't necessarily think like Janice is going to be hanging out at that , you know , at a barbecue with him and Keely I read anytime soon . But like I like that , he's like no , you can be that here .
You don't have to have a space off in the distance hidden where people don't even know you're Rory Kent , where you get to have feelings . So , yeah , I was into that moment .
Okay , yeah , all right , I mean , if that's what works .
¶ Following Jamie in a Sketchy Neighborhood
And then you see Jamie , everyone is bawling and Jamie looks like what I imagine I would look like if I was in that room . Which like emotionless and I'm like God , I must be as broken inside . If this is a universal thing , I'm like , all right , well , I'm kind of Jamie in this .
And then he ducks out the side and he is like looking sketchy heads out of the hotel , hoodie on At any time someone puts a . You know again , I can't say someone At any time a white boy puts a hoodie on , that's fine , you know he's not up to no good .
I remember coach alluded to telling his son like here's a rule of what you're not going to do , because it is literally dangerous living in LA , you will not do this , yeah .
I had to be like , yeah , I get it , but no .
Right , and when Jamie does it , you're like what ? Okay ? Like it's almost like putting on his invisibility cloak or something like you're like what are you up to , boy ? So you know , jamie , jamie heads out . Like you know , there's this little I'm sure this is a no-modge to something . Boss this like chase , walk , chase . Is there no more to something ?
Am I missing something ? Sure it might .
I couldn't figure it out . There's nothing specific springing to mind other than any time that you are following somebody Like Akili is more of the , we are on the hunt . I'm going to crouch and like , do a side step so nobody sees what I'm doing . And Roy is like can we fucking , can we walk ? Can we go ? Can we follow him ?
Right . Also , what better way to draw attention to yourself than to try to look like you're not wanting anyone to see you ? Yes , Like you immediately go . What's going on over there ? So I thought that was part of Roy's thing too .
Like if we don't want to see him , like we're following him , let's just walk like a couple who are walking down the street , right , yeah ?
I think that's true , and then I'll point out that it was a number of very , very beautifully framed shots Excellent lighting the shot with the moon , I thought yeah .
Shot with the moon centered down the like the row houses , and you get a shot of the stairs from up above , really totally pivoting you know , looking down the stairs with very cool light and shadow , and that's why I'm like , oh , this is like borderline hitch cocky , but I couldn't , I just couldn't place it .
So , yeah , then they continue and they lose Jamie and then , coach , you know , they go down like a subway stairs into like a tiled sort of subway tunnel where the lights are flickering like Jacob's ladder and Jamie was gone . And what happens here , coach ?
So it's the two of them sort of . You know that half bicker of like I didn't screw it up , he screwed it up , kind of a vibe , you know , oh the fuck is he ? I don't know , you've lost him , which I thought was funny . Like you've lost him , you said he went down there , so the figure port , he continues . I did not , you said that .
No , I said he's in a tunnel . I didn't say he was in this tunnel , which is fantastic , right , because , like , because it was you know the next line , like , well , there's no other tunnel , like , like , roy , really , that's your , that's your great defense of what you said . So , anyway , I don't believe it . You've lost Jamie Tart . You can't lose Jamie Tart .
Well , you have . And then they walk through what seems like it may be like a what's the word for that ? Almost like the hub , seems like a , like a hub , kind of a space that would lead you to walk in different directions .
Like an intersection kind of yeah .
Of other tunnels , whatever .
And then , as they step into that open space , we get the , you know , sort of the semi jump scare although we know what the monster is , so it's not quite that of Jamie stepping up behind them and they , they get Oi , and Keely screams fucking out , which there's no context in which me saying that wouldn't be so conscious , but God damn it , I wish there were .
I have , from the beginning of this show , every time someone went fucking hell , I've thought why don't we have that here ? I want that here .
I don't need bangers and mash .
I don't need a lot Like a lot of things I could go visit for , but I want , I don't need bangers and mash . You would if you tried to coach I'm sure . I , for some . Anyway , I love it when they say that why are you following me ? Just want to make sure you . Okay , you prick , which is just love in a line .
Yeah , yeah , right away , right , like we're back to it , right . What do you ? What's going on , jamie ? Are you buying drugs , which is so mom .
Oh my God . Yeah , I know , I know you jump right to drugs Really .
Keeley , I know , I know you've seen some shit you've got to think is like it's not the drugs , is it Like ? I just thought very like , oh my , what is happening ? So , all right , then you can see on Jamie's face , like you know , you two fucking idiots , and so he's come on and and they follow him . We then happen upon them going through a neighborhood .
You have some kids playing some version of soccer here , but it seems like it probably involves some sort of pain or getting hit with the ball or so . I guess they're not quite , but they're going , they're doing their thing . And are you Jamie taught ?
And yeah , and the other kid , because you would , I would think , think like , oh , they're seeing this famous footballer , like they're oh my God , stars in their eyes . Right , jamie fought . Screw you , dickhead prick . Oh my God , I was like I love this place . Also , I never want to be in that place . And then these are children .
Yeah , it's all or a twist , is like Dickensian street . You know what I mean . Like you're like . Oh my God Jesus . Like what else are these kids remind you .
What would you say , coach , like ? What else are these kids up to Like we ? I know I was in a group of kids who cursed at this age . I was not in a group of kids who under any circumstances , would have said dickhead or prick in the presence of adults . Yeah , yeah , no , no , no what . Yeah , I thought like oh my .
God . And if I said that growing up , where I grew up and it wasn't like I was in the hard streets or whatever , it was just the culture at the time If I had said that at that age to an adult , they would have , at the minimum , open hand slapped me . It was just Boston . What are you going ?
to like .
Like , whoa Like , go on , check out this little piss .
It'll be here with the mouth .
How good was that Was that any good at all ? I'm trying Piss off , no Well no , no , no , yeah , kind of , I guess it kind of could work in this little piss .
Yeah , kind of Okay . I'm climbing the ladder , coach , I'm trying to get there .
No , I appreciate it . You're getting there , coach , I love it . But yeah , no , this sort of weirdly . This is just me . I'm sure it felt like shades of Jamie Tartt Sr as the little shithead in the middle and Bug and the other dude , oh yeah .
Like it was like a version of that for me , yeah .
I mean I'm sure that was universal , but also Jamie and Colin and Isaac at the beginning of season one Also that yeah .
They've got a few three stooches things going on , not that we look at that triangles . So I guess it makes sense , but triangles coach .
PB and J . Yes , there's a there . I could see that accepted . Well , yeah , yeah , yes , I'm sure it could have been that . The only thing is okay , they were punching down in season one . Yes , I think these kids are clearly not like punching up . I'm like they're like . These kids are like , yeah , they're really bold for , for , for children .
In a way that you in a way that suggests that they haven't been acculturated to the norms of polite society by someone . You know that they're learning the rules of the street on their own and you know .
so the pessimist in me says that Jamie and bug and the other guy whose name I'm forgetting right now , the three of them . Yeah , a lot of that was directed towards Jamie and what we saw , which is technically punching down because Jamie is senior , as Jamie's dad Like even if Jamie was big enough to beat him up like that's your fucking dad .
So this is pessimistically . This is they are learning how to be bullies and eventually these three kids will bully whoever they feel like . The optimist says they are bullying and they will continue punching up that this generation , for whatever reason , has learned you only punch up , and so you're more than welcome .
Interesting .
When you see a professional footballer who has left your team to go to a different team , you are allowed to fuck with him as much as you want .
Yeah that's almost like like a lasting , a terrible lasting impact of the of the existence of trolls . I always you know I can't stand this . By the way , denbo Cullens is the other guy's name , which is why the bug is easier to remember than Denbo . Cullens . But yeah , no , this is a .
This is a thing where you know someone on social media starts getting ripped on and then you , then it becomes OK to rip on people . It reminds me of you have an actor who plays a character that you don't like . King Joffrey in Game of Thrones is one . Then , like people , tee off on the , on the .
The actor you know in real life , or coach , coach , was saying about all this fantasy football player fantasy , basketball fantasy baseball didn't do . Well , I'm going to go , you know , slide into his DMs and and and flame him . You know , you just go . Ok , like what if people have sort of lost the , lost the thread somewhere along the ?
way .
Well , there was something that I am and I am not always schooled on it , and it may have already been covered on the antagonist , because I've been out of loop , so I will just admit that , but somebody showed me that I guess somebody decided it was time to take down Martin Short , him being such a horrible human being and all , and I was like what the fuck ?
I was like we have reached end stage , internet , when the person who needs to get straightened out is Martin Short . Ok , sorry , go on .
Well , just in case anybody saw that , if anybody is as terminally online as I am and didn't read the actual article , the headline was extremely misleading , and so then a lot of people . The headline was essentially why do we keep putting up with Martin Short , an implication being he is not funny , he is annoying . Why do we keep celebrating him in these ways ?
The actual article itself was more about how his specific brand of comedy is intentionally irritating and annoying , which I believe is a fair thing to say , like the characters Martin Short does .
Yeah , no , they are annoying people . That is his stick .
That is what he does , like a Jiminy Glick is not supposed to be a person that you're excited to be interviewed by Jiminy Glick was so great , so that's a thing he also played Uncle . Jack on Arrested Development and was one of these low-hard , egotistical assholes who couldn't actually measure up , so it was not as harsh as I think people expected .
It to be based on the headline and then it became a celebration of Martin Short is actually great . Why are we going after Martin Short ? So there's just too many disconnections now between somebody saying something and somebody else responding and then it becoming a thing . Please , nobody go ridicule the poor slate writer .
I think that trying to write something and having it .
Oh no , is that happening ?
I haven't seen it yet .
I've just seen a lot of oh , I see .
Luckily it's been a lot of like . Here's a great clip of Martin Short being hilarious in that a this is the writer's home address .
Please go yell at him , so I don't know , no , doxing anybody is horrific , but also , like , I think there's irresponsible ways to frame conversations . I don't know , I actually don't know anything about this , so I'm not casting aspersions on Slade or whoever this , I don't know anything about this . I just saw it tangentially happen .
And then somebody said , oh , the only reason of Martin Short on what's the show ? Only murders , only murders in the building . Yeah , I'm just going to hide how painfully unfunny Steve Martin is and I'm like , okay , I go . I'm like okay , like it's fine . I remember the moment . I remember this . I'm not saying that Steve Martin is always funny .
No one is always funny . Okay , but this is a legend of comedy , a true legend .
Yeah , like yeah , a living legend . What comedy is in America ?
Absolutely change the face of civilization , right , right .
And I remember I remember going to see Dr no Sergeant Bilko , where I went in thinking I'm here because I'm a , I'm here because I'm a Steve Martin fan and I go to see comedies , and I remember that I , I reaffirmed for me , I'm completely over whatever Steve Martin is doing right now and I am a oh my God . I just forgot his name . I am a oh my God .
How do I Phil Hartman ?
Oh oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh , oh yeah , phil .
Hartman , yeah , I am a massive Phil Hartman , I will . I am so crazy about whatever Phil Hartman is doing .
¶ Opinions and Humor Preferences
This is a terrible movie . How long , you know ? You look , okay , we were talking about Rodney Dangerfield the other day , and Rodney Dangerfield is a legend or whatever , but like at some point , like , yeah , His humor was dated at some point . Of course , you know what did we talk . You know certain people . All they did was punch down who was it ?
Don Rickals , Don Rickals , his whole thing is just right . So so at some point and Steve Martin's like is not that , but I could see how it would be like okay , it's not Bo Burnham in appealing to this exact generation , but then , like I don't know why , you have to piss on it . It's see , I want to like , tell me your joke .
I always say like , okay , I once worked with this person who said Ben Stiller sucks , and I had met Ben . Stiller and and been , you know , sort of adjacent to things he was working on and met him and saw him working round the clock and was very like sort of in the , in this proximity of watching him go .
Like all I saw was him treating everybody with respect and being unbelievably decent and working his fucking ass off .
And I look at like all the things he's put on the screen and then you have like a 20 something writer being like he fucking sucks and I'm like okay , well , that's like , I'm like the , the sort of critical thing , the thing where you go , I'll be a critic , I don't wanna put up money at my stuff , like whatever , but I'll just sit back and throw rocks .
It really rose me the wrong way .
But you know it's funny it's . You know , be curious , not judgmental .
I think there's something that would be a corollary to that , where you are a coach and like , for , you know , there are all sorts of things that you know it's not for me , you know what I mean , it's just not for me and that's and I'm not saying everyone always has to say it's not for me .
I think sometimes I watch things and go that joke doesn't work , because that joke doesn't fucking work . Like a joke has a structure and that didn't do it and it's not funny . Okay , that's fine , that can be technical , that can be whatever . But , then there's like a whole battle of stuff that I'm like all right .
Like you know , I'm not mad and I think it's a part of the internet culture you were pointing to earlier and our culture more broad . Okay , here's an example . This is very silly , but I think it captures it . It started this year now and it comes every year , where people go fucking berserk with their hatred for candy corn .
Oh , just let me know if you like candy corn so I can know if you like eating crayons or whatever . And it's fine and it's good fun , and I'm pretty sure no one ever lost a life over the great candy corn debates . But I think it's weird .
I do personally think it's weird that nobody fucking asked you and that you feel the need to swerve all the way out of your fucking lane to make sure we all understand . You think this particular . I'm allergic to peanuts . I'm not like outlaw snickers . I just don't eat them . Don't bring them around me , you can make me sick , but that doesn't mean nobody else .
I think it's odd that everyone has to like the candy I like and no one should like that candy because I don't like it . And to me that's the Steve Martin thing . All right , it's not for you . But guess what , baby ? I will never stop saying when something arrives that I'm excited about . The new phone books are here , yeah , I meant the phone books .
That will be funny . That will be funny to me Until it is all over Always funny , and so you didn't like it , okay , or you never even seen it . You think this old guy who you're looking at is all there is to Steve Martin and we're like , no , this is a guy taking like his victory lap dickhead .
Yeah , there's a lot going on , and so I need to specify a few different things . Number one is even though I think the candy corn hate is overdone and ridiculous at this point , there is something about picking a very petty , unimportant fight and dying on that hill that I will always find hilarious .
That is more akin to like there is a Lake Superior Twitter account and it picks fights with things like the Pacific Ocean Twitter account about what qualifies as a beach , and I will laugh at that shit all the time , all the time . That's very funny . Actually . That's hilarious to me . It's really good .
Number two there is stuff that is not for you , and it doesn't matter if it's not for you . Nick Kroll happens to be a comedian that I don't love . Whatever it is that he's doing , it's not for me . I don't think that he's bad at it . I don't think that other people shouldn't laugh at it .
It's not a thing that I'm like you're doing ill in the world and so I need to yell at you about it .
¶ Preferences and Experiences With Roy Kent
There are comedians who have done stuff .
Yeah , okay , I didn't know . You felt that way , did you watch ?
Big Mouth . So I like Big Mouth I do , but then the Kroll show and some of his other stuff I'm not into . I need him toned down .
I can't get into it . I actually like Nick Kroll and I think he's good and I don't laugh at it . I just go , eh , like I don't , For whatever reason .
it just doesn't , it misses my he's at a 12 and I need his style to be at like a seven , like it's not letting out for me , yeah but I like him .
I think he's whatever and yeah , I can't . He dated a Kroll or I don't know .
I can't like . So I'll say that there's stuff like how bad can he be for dating , like I don't know ? People are like I was dead as a billionaire , so that's why he's a successful comedian .
I'm like I don't know about that . I did not know that .
Maybe that definitely helps . Anytime , being a billionaire helps everything , but I don't know if that's I'm not gonna say that's why he's a comedian . I do think that there's some shit that and this is mostly past . When it comes up now , I'm like oh no , no , no , that's not that , it's not for me , that's that , it's actively bad .
And so I always think of Andrew Dice Clay's early 90s stuff where he's extremely misogynistic and the joke is not that he is misogynistic , it's just he's telling misogynistic jokes . There's a little bit of shit with Dave Chappelle and his turf shit and his most recent stand-ups where I'm like that's not that , it's not for me , that's that , it's actively bad .
It's a problem right .
And that I want to draw that distinction , because when I get angry later about this episode , it's going to be something that I don't think is just not for me or not the way that I liked it or what I would have done , but something that I do think is like pretty actively bad to put out into society .
It's something that I think , oh no , no , no , no , I don't want you teaching this , don't tell people this is good . So when we get there , I want everyone to know . I do know the difference between those two things . But lastly , I'll say everyone should go Google Steve Martin , beard and Banjo and listen . You don't have to like him , but I do .
Oh yeah , but I do , I do a lot .
Listen , he's one of the finest Banjo players on the planet .
And just like no bullshit , no bullshit . One of the best .
Shockingly hot in the 70s . Like no person should be that funny and that talented and that good looking . It's like I can't believe that Miss Piggy didn't leave Kermit for Steve Martin in the Muppets . Take Men Hand , or no , that might have been the caper , but either one . Yeah . You fucking leave your husband for Steve Martin when he looks like that .
Jesus Christ , of course you do .
Yeah , he's a rehearsaler .
Cool . Yes , yes , he is .
I want to point out the actual insults the boys say to Jamie Tarrant , more like Jamie Fart screw you , dickhead prick . Yeah , who are you ? City's gonna fuck you up tomorrow . City's gonna fuck you up tomorrow . A little kids , I cackled . Yeah , you spaz you little twat . Wow , yeah , it's not for you pussy . These are right from the no .
No , no , these are kids , yeah , no , these are kids , yeah .
Yeah , go on , walk by . I smell your bum from here .
What in the world ? I guess you have to make it right . They have to be beyond the pale for the joke . It has to leave no doubt that we are saying these kids , this is what we're talking about here . So anyway , but yeah , it was pretty intense .
So the person accompanying Jamie Fart turns to the kids and they realize , holy shit , who is it coach ? It's Roy Kent , yeah , and is he gonna fucking suffer fools ?
No , he is not . And we all wait to see what he's gonna tell them . And he says one of my favorite moments good lads . Now I'd like to point out that energy from Roy . He celebrates that like male , angry , bitter cervix is Nate breaking Ted's office window . Then he does it again , oh , when Isaac throws the chair . And he does it here .
So he may cry and he may come to love Meg Ryan , but he's not gonna abandon the part of him that thinks sometimes a chair's gotta be thrown . And I appreciated that about the development of the character . I don't need him at the end to be Niles Crane . There's another way for this to go .
And if you're talking about a new manhood , I do think it's gonna include a little bit of that kind of stuff . I think I told a story about the kid at school , I guess Mexican , american kiss . As to my son , use the N word referencing it to him , but not like hard R , not like we're gonna do it again , we're gonna kill you .
We're such a great , I'm so cool , I can version . And my son told me the story and he wasn't . He's not , none of you know him , so he's not one to like . Oh . And then I told him he's not a oh what's my man's name who Rebecca dated . He's not gonna tell the story .
Oh , John Wings Knight .
He's not John Wings Knight talking about the time , but he grabbed the kid by his hoodie and said don't you ever right . You know right , I went , he did , oh yeah , oh . I never told you the story , it was like a year or two ago . Yeah , yeah , and he kind of told me the story .
Thanks for sharing he kind of tells me a story , kind of off hand , like whatever he's telling the story , and he tells me he grabs the kid and he pulled him close and he goes . Don't you ever say that to me again . I was like yeah , no .
I'm good for him .
I was totally like yeah , hell yeah . But you know , like I think you know , if we're gonna send our kids out into this world , like they might have a moment or two where they've gotta grab somebody by a hoodie and go don't make me do it . Don't make me do it . I'm a nice guy , I come to school , don't bother nobody , don't make me do it .
And so , yeah , I'm okay with it . I'm okay that you have a gear . You know , unassuming kit man , that you have a gear somewhere there that allows you to be pissed off enough that just like a little residual anger for you like shatters a window , I'm okay . I am okay with Isaac throwing that chair .
If I'm on that team and he gets in trouble , I take up a collection to pay for the TV , like that is a thing I can promise you I would do .
Yes , I think what I like about your story is when it is justified . It is justified Like I don't like the idea that people should always be soft , because sometimes there is occasion where that is not what it's called for .
I also think that there is a piece of this that is , they were number one not impressed with Jamie's celebrity and I feel like Roy would appreciate that . And two , jamie left their team and so those kids are gonna give them shit and Roy is like that is what you do , that is how you were a fan when he leaves your team and he comes back .
You give him shit . So I think that this was like two parts of Roy's code where he is gonna say , yeah , no , you go ahead and call him a wanker .
Yes , you know , I'm glad you just said that . I'm really glad you said it , Cause it's like , well , what are you doing , Like encouraging kids to be you know ? And no , he's actually encouraging these kids to have a code .
And I think you're right , and I think each of the instances I just pointed out was a code right , Because Nate says I too am very livid , right , which was a funny way to say it . But we got why the anger was there and it was like yeah , yeah , fuck this shit . So anyway , I do love me some Roy .
Awesome . I'm still very torn on the good lads . I understand it , but I'm also like but that's your style too .
Like you're like this would be the like yeah , this is like there's a bridge too far , and then there's a tunnel pass there , and then there's an overpass , and then there's a freeway , and then there's these kids . For you Like , this is not , this is like what . Yeah , no way .
Yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , you know what I mean . It's fine , I'm just like man , it's strong , it's strong , it's strong . That's all
¶ Ted Lasso Analysis and Current Issues
right . It's a funny beat in the story . Oh my gosh . Oh , that was sick . Yes , yes , it's whatever . It's a nice little moment . And then we turn and the doorbell rings . We don't know where Jamie is leading them . Possibly to buy drugs . Could be boss right behind that door . We don't know . We don't know who's . I love it .
We're going to leave it there for today . If you have the sense that we're drawing out these episodes because we don't want it to end subconsciously , there may be something to that . I'm not going to pretend I have all the answers .
These are long episodes , so this has been part five and I don't know how many it's going to take us to get through this episode . But it could be just the existential dread of knowing that boss is waiting in the shadows or waiting in the bright light of day . Actually , it's not even shadows . She's declared her intention to smite .
It's Roy in the alley near the park when he's teaching Isaac how to be the captain , how to get back in touch . The phone is going to write up Perfect , that's me .
Yes .
That's what I'm doing right now .
Perfect . I mean , I know we're going to wrap it and let's please , but you see how boss was able to do that in that moment . I am telling you , and I'm going to say this now to the Butter Cups I could start an entire religion based on this text . It covers it all . It just fucking covers it all . But anything .
I totally unironically and I've told both of you this , but I want to share it with the audience real quick and then I'll shut up that I completely unironically in one week , two different people came to me with real life situations , like we were not goofing around , and I quoted Ted Lasso and we went forward in the conversation .
They totally got it Like that's where this show is with me . So , yes , I get it . You say to me the light brightening up , and I go you're right . Now I understand . Now I understand .
I love it . I love it , Coach . It's good to have a true believer on the show . It's good to have a fallen priestess on the show .
In every way .
And we're going to have yeah right , it's all . Listen , it's fine . And then it's good to have an absolute nitwit in the middle , never knowing where they're coming or going , and I hope I'm doing a bang up job as that . Coach , where do people find you if they want to find you ?
UnstuckAF is the podcast . Wherever you get your podcast , check us out . Hearing those stories , learning those lessons , let's live our best lives , boss . What about you ?
Still on Twitter .
Finally finding the picture of Steve Martin and also the grid lining up all the NFL football teams , so you could check out both of those .
It's at Twitter and at Blue Sky , both Dumbly Underscore Chambers and writing about the ways in which men are mean to me when they wear newsboy caps at the antagonist , which is antagonistblogcom , because I have been goaded into it by Laura Burns . Good , good , the inesimale .
Laura Burns , who's managing editor over at the blog . We thank you everybody for joining us for this very involved conversation and for putting up with all of our forays into fantasy football and TV show watching and you name it , Laura Burns , and we're so happy that you're joining us for this exploration of Ted Lasso .
Please support your local libraries and the written word . Please support the actors and writers who are still on strike , and I mean it's just too long . And yeah , Coach , you see Coach's face . He's just got this . He's just displeased with the way it's going . And yeah , Coach , you should be here , muted , right now .
Oh sorry , I was going to say I don't like bullies and that's where I am right now . That's like I . Just that's the space I'm in , like I'm in a . This is not nuanced . This is not . I have no analysis for you on numbers . I don't like bullies and I feel like I am watching bullying and it's really making me nuts .
It seems crazy to me , but I feel like there's . You know , I we really really try to be curious and not judgmental , but there are certain things where you go you don't want to be binary and you're thinking , but you go . I feel like I know who the good guy is in this one , Like the person asking for 1% of the income , what like less than 100 .
You just go , you know . It's like I see , I see this everywhere . But one of my this meme that I saw was like hey , guess what ? Like you , looking back on history , the people who burn books are never the good guys , never .
Yeah , you know there's a trend we could take a look at .
I'm like what you know ? You should go , oh my God , like why is this now so hard to anyway ? Yeah , so it's easy to weigh in on one side of that and obviously we're we're biased , but two of the three of us are members of the Writers Guild , so you know , it's good to point that out to the one person who , yeah , I think it's lesser than Thank you .
I was like where's he going with this ? I was like where , and of course that's where you chose to go .
This just naturally sets itself up for that right boss .
Oh , you were talking about me .
I'm sorry , that's great when you said that you were done .
I just started checking out . I was already finished .
I already said my thing , yeah , you and everyone else , yeah , yeah , you said your thing and then right started talking . Researching news boy cast .
Exactly Lot of pictures .
God , help us all . Ok , thank you everyone . We can't wait to explore part six with you next time . And then we have all these kind of so many cool things lined up . I can't wait for you to join us . It's going to be now . I got my kids back in school and we just survived our first bout with COVID in my house , so we never had code .
We missed it until right now . And then two of the two of the four of us in the house right now two of my kids are in college , so they're blissfully not getting it here in the house , but we had to divide the house in half and whatever .
So , but now we have the kids back to school and then we're going to have more time to record and get things done , and so a lot of fun things coming down the pike . Can't wait for you to join us for that . Thank you for being the best listener community for any podcast and thank you to all the buttercups for supporting us .
It really does mean the world and actually you doing that makes a literal difference . I cannot explain this enough . I know it seems like at some point I'm going to be . I want to be brutally transparent with our costs . So people go oh , does it help if I give three bucks ? Yes , it really helps . It really really helps .
This is not cheap to pull off and all of those little subscriptions they really add up . So thank you to everyone who's doing that . It really means the world to us . It helps us continue to do this podcast , which we love , and hopefully we're putting good vibes out into the world . Ok , that's it for today .
We will see you next time for part six , and until then , we are Richmond Till we die . That was really good . Actually , even when you try not to be good , you guys are some sumpotico . I love it . All right , thanks , everybody . See you next time .
