¶ Ted Lasso and Taylor Swift Insights
Welcome to our Ted Lasso talk , the Tedcast . Welcome all Greyhound fans , welcome all you sinners from the dog track and all the AFC Richmond fans around the world . It's the lasso way around these parts with Coach , coach and Boss , without further ado . Coach Castleton , you know my enjoyment , but okay , it's not for me , it's fine .
It's not for me , and that's fine . Like she's not , I am not in her fan base and that's fine .
So tell me what's this other piece with the older ? Maybe your cohort ?
Well , definitely my cohort . I don't know Like . I'm sure there are plenty of Taylor Swift fans who are complete normal human beings and I don't want to denigrate anybody .
But I read something about how some Taylor Swift fans and I'm imagining that it's middle-aged white women such as myself , not me , but people I probably hang out with said something about how she was definitely going to re-release her 1989 album .
She was going to announce that she was re-releasing it on this specific day , because if you add up these numbers , it equals this number of years and months and days and hours and everything else . Yeah , I'm a sucker for that , and then she did announce it .
Oh , so now it's over for us , and .
I can't tell . So the thing I can't tell is was that always Taylor's plan and they picked up on it and they were like , yes , we've got it . Or did Taylor have somebody on the internet that was like hey people are saying this shit , do you want to do it ? Should we do this ? And then she did and people are like fucking , the Illuminati is running shit .
So those are all my thoughts . I like it , I'm into it . It has been kind of fascinating to watch . Truly , it seems like half the country loses its mind To some people . I get the sense they're not even aware there is a tour .
And then other people are like I flew here and we took out a second on the house and thank God and I would do it again and I'm like , wow , that is a really large excitement gap .
And you know what . Bless every single one of those people . If that like , I traveled across the Midwest for the national and I probably spent more than a lot of people spent on Taylor Swift or Beyonce Tickets . Like I understand both , I understand both . It's just I am not in my stadium era anymore .
That's a great way to frame that part of the conversation . I am not in my stadium .
I can't do it .
You know what I'm kind of with you . It's funny when Jay-Z came out with 444 and people were trying to decide , do we like it , do we not like it ? And I was like this is going to throw motherfuckers off for a long time . Here's why this is the first of like popular you know there's been people doing this shit Like .
This is the first like major artist , major release who put out a grown man rap album . I said this album doesn't even belong in a fucking . And I said just that I was like this album .
He doesn't belong in a fucking stadium , this album belongs in your local blue note and so , and I would have the time of my goddamn life , I would order a fucking double of something delicious and brown and tell everybody shut the fuck up .
So I could hear every note and word , like I don't want you motherfuckers chanting along , shut the fuck up , let's enjoy this performance . Like that's where I would be . You know what I mean . And I was like , yeah , so people are going to know what to do , so I get what you're saying there .
Yeah , no , like I want it at a club where , if you reach far enough , you could definitely touch both walls at some place , like maybe maybe it's just a bathroom hallway , but at some place I want it so small that you need to squeeze through .
I'm going to tell you this because I you know I have logged several more years than you . This may be in your future . This may be in your future . I have fully gotten to where . This is my first time admitting it . So welcome in Buttercups , when there's almost nothing , truly almost nothing . I wouldn't rather watch via the internet .
If you told me right now , pay us Sure Ticket price , Like I would literally be like you know what that's fair you to see this show . This is what it costs , but you're going to stream it to my house .
I don't have to move , I don't have to drive , I don't have to park , I don't have to deal with this dipshit behind me who keeps dropping his fucking drink . I don't have to deal with this one over here . I just sit in my house where everything is where I put it .
I would do that for almost I'm trying to think of this anything where I feel like , no , I've got like , maybe if , like Stevie Wonder , we're like you get backstage passes , Like you have to be that level of like . Okay , this is once in a lifetime shit , but otherwise I'm good . Sporting events too Hate to break into you ?
Oh God , no , I'm never going to . The only reason I continue seeing the national live is because there's a very good chance that Matt Burning or might scream slash , accidentally spit in my face , and that's the only reason I actually go to . That Like I just he comes out to the audience and he screams at us and I want to .
I want to be there for that , Otherwise , yes , I went so many places and it never happened . And at a certain point , like am I ready to be heard again ? Am I ready to go somewhere and not ?
be spit on .
I don't think I am . I don't think emotionally .
Right , what's even the point of going out ? Yeah , if I'm going to get dressed up and put on a real pants .
I'm going to get dressed up . Somebody better spit on me , god damn it .
Do you know what you didn't ? You didn't realize ? You were saying that I'm going to spit on you . That's what that is . Oh God , oh , my God .
Oh , that's fucking fantastic . My family cult of arms Wow .
Hey , hi everybody .
I just didn't want to interrupt . You guys had some good flow there . Welcome everybody . Welcome to our deep dive analysis of Ted Lasso , season three , episode 11 , mom sitting . This is part two . What you just heard was started with Taylor Swift sort of migrated into coaches . Racist attitudes around white food . He'll only eat brown food .
Put some brown food in me , I'm not sure why . And then and then , as you see , finished up with bosses family motto , if I got it correctly , quote , unquote somebody better spit on me .
If I'm going to put on pants , if I'm going to get dressed up , somebody better spit on me .
I am . Yeah , I watched a hysterical video the other day . I don't know if you guys know the Holderness family . It's , it's like they're fantastic and I just , I really appreciate them giving voice to certain things and one one thing . They're just so honest and so likable and just wonderful people . They do a great job , they're hyper talented .
But they did this one thing where they were begging their son to put on any pants that didn't have elastic . Is it possible to , can we please ? My son in college just just called me today and he is taking a course called social implications of technology . Oh yeah , and the kids in the class did not pick up . The students didn't pick up .
The professor came in sort of like a live wire type of guy . He's like hey , it's been a while . I used to work at this college and it took some time off .
I came back and he's like oh man , I went to sign up for this , this faculty program I used to be part of and you know , no one , no one does it anymore and I was trying to find other faculty was hard to like , get to know . Is that weird ? You guys like isn't that weird ? And it's like crickets .
You know what I mean , because you're right , they don't write . And he says you know , like , if you were going to go in there , like what would you guys do ? What , what , what you know what sort of like interaction . How would you kind of break the ice or whatever , like what's the easiest way for you to like in for you guys ?
He's like on the next tier , you know , my son is like . Luckily my son is on the spectrum and never picks up , so he doesn't know that he should . Well , he's not , doesn't have the thing where he goes . Oh yeah , no one's talking .
I probably shouldn't talk , so he is the first one to be like I guess I'd ask them their name or something and he's like great name . Yes , you know like one kid to speak . You know what I mean the professor but he's like obviously showing . You know obviously this thing about hey , listen , like you guys don't even know how to break the ice anymore .
You know , like this doesn't exist .
Yeah , exactly .
Not , not a small part of which is the concept of taking from believe . It's Jean-Paul Sartre who said Hell is other people . Why would you go to a football game and have some boar screaming profanity when you try to show your kids like you can't ?
You can't curate the experience for your family anymore because , exactly , society has waned to the point where it is untenable . And so , yeah , there are .
I think I was trying to think of what would I love that you say like I might get out if , if I get to meet Stevie Wonder in person , then I might go somewhere short of that , I was thinking of Obama for me .
I'm like yeah , this is the strata we're talking about , Like , if you're someone hit wonder from the 90s I don't know , buddy I think we're gonna have to tell me about that .
Those are fun though Like these , like washed up has been bands that are still doing it are kind of amazing to . Oh my God , I go to a couple like here in the . It depends you got to get a good one , but boss is doing ? What's this ? What's the term for this ? Come see come see . The great my mom .
It's a little bit everyone's got their own hand back , come see , come stop . But yeah , there are some that are like they get so excited when they have new faces . They kind of you know they've been doing it forever and they got to just kind of put their fucking kid through private school and they got a wife . Just get back on the road .
Doesn't want to hang out with them anymore when they were cool rock star .
You know what I mean . When they had the whole world ahead of them .
They just this washed up nightmare in denim . You know doesn't own it doesn't own a tie . Oh , they're gonna . It's . It's rock being a rock star man . It's not all balloons and rainbows , boss .
Well , that's why most of them had to I don't want to say die , by the time they were 40 , but all the best ones . It seems like what was it ?
the what's the opposite of the magical age is like the one where they yeah 27 is what I was thinking .
Yeah is when a bunch of like the legends have passed away Hendrix and Kurt Cobain and Janice Joplin .
It's like I thought he was .
But anyway , no , no , no , no , no , no , no , but I know it's 27 .
I know like 27 is a thing , but I know 27 is like a thing , yeah , what do you think you know about Tupac ?
Let me explain , let me explain what was our thing about that ? I don't think hello .
Thank you for having me . I don't think I can properly capture the impact of Tupac Shakur without talking about the the obvious connection with Sarah Michelle Geller . Wasn't that the yes ?
yes , yes , yes , yes yes .
It was the whitest three name actress you can think of at any given time , and great it's it Mm .
hmm . Yeah , you know , I think that what I actually said was biggie and Julia .
Oh , yes , that's exactly , but still , yes , that was very funny . Yes , ted Lester .
I am your , I am your host . Coach Castin the bigot , the food bigot , with me . Here is a coach . Bishop Can't find my wings ? Coach . I wish you could have seen his face as he started to think about it , oh yeah , and with us is all the way to the end of the video .
And I should say , even though I don't know nearly enough about rap and I'm not the rap expert on this podcast , I was just listening to a different podcast where somebody said something about how he wishes he had all future close .
But he said , like you know , the clothes in the future videos , and I immediately thought the rapper future , who had a child with what's her face to see her and blinking on right now , sierra , sierra . And then they were , like you know , like Blade Runner or blah , and I was like , oh , you mean in the future , you do .
You do not mean the music videos of the artist future and so . I felt like if I were going to confuse those two , I felt like I did In the cool way , as opposed to the opposite . My children have pretty proud of that . But
¶ Relatable Dynamics With Parents
now I'm kind of wishing .
I had one more to name them , blade Runner , which would be kind of a cool , kind of a cool name . Don't , don't , don't Blade Runner , get a pet for that .
No that's not a pet , I know .
You got to get a pet for that . You can't name a child Having named a dog , biggie .
Smalls , I've got to say it does add a level of fun to every single day of my life .
Like , just like , not a ton . It's not like where he's rolling around belly . Yeah , it just adds a little something to the day .
Yeah , I am God we're so all over the place , but this is the last thing before we start talking about Ted Lasso . I don't know if there's anybody out there that played the Witcher video game . The three , the Wild Hunt . Love that shit out of that game . One of my favorite played it twice . Love the TV show , love it .
When I was briefly watching my mom's cat when she was out of town , I said this cat's name is Linus and the boyfriend said that cat's name is Catacan and I said it's not , it's not . It's like I already named him Linus . He has a name , it's Linus .
And he said no , that cat's name is Catacan , it's the can do cat with it's the cat's name , cat with it's the vampire cat with a can do spirit . And I was like okay , fine . Fine , this cat's name is Catacan . Now , that's fine .
So vampire from Witcher catacan Now want your boyfriend to come on the show in place of you .
I'm really going to try that from putting that much airtime between come and the rest of you .
I'm going to gently nudge you More of a suggestion . There we go , that's All right . Bingo , ted Lasso . We left off with Nate sauntering back to the kitchen at Taste of Athens to retrieve 75 of the finest kebabs money can buy for a grinning Isaac , and we cut to a extreme .
Close up of this is this is Ted's phone and he is texting beard , and it seems they're planning excursions . Boss and beard . He texts a crown emoji and an anchor emoji . And what was your ? What did you make of that ?
That's the crown and anchor of the pub . I didn't know if it was excursions , I thought he was just saying , like are we meeting at the pub , as we always do ? And then Ted jokingly said or a museum , maybe a library ? Got it Like , got it ?
Sure , we could go to the place we always go , but then informing him , sorry I'm going to be late , yeah , what came up us ?
His mom , from the bench where she was sitting outside of his apartment waiting for him to hanging out , stalking the area where she believes he might be , as if she were me in real life , stalking the Ted Lasso actors , when I was in that same area .
Did you catch any ?
boss ? Oh , definitely not . Apparently , the night after I was there there was a private party for the cast because they were going to begin filming shortly after that , but they would have closed down the pub . I wouldn't have been able to get in . Plus , I think the following night was when I was seeing the play , so it was fine .
I had my own stuff going on .
I'd be cool if you went now , because you could just let them know like , oh no , it's me boss from the Ted cast .
And then obviously , right , it's me boss . And then also could be like you're not that I'm not that impressed by the way .
You're not even bringing this time . I didn't .
Yeah , like I only brought three shirts to sign , that's it .
I don't know if this is a universal feeling , but I've mentioned how my mom is a daddy lasso in many ways and I cannot explain to you . I just want you to look when you get a chance . Look at the first shot of Ted when he looks up from his phone . What he's watching is what he's got his chin down .
He's looking up over the top of his eyes , sort of eyebrows up , kind of making a face . He is exasperated . She has been around for how many seconds at this point , coach ?
Not very many Seconds . You can measure in seconds . Yeah , like we just got there , like we just got to this place yeah .
He is dying .
He's ready to launch her back across the Atlantic .
This is my life . I just want to point this out . This is my existence . It is so relatable and I wonder how many of our listeners , how many of our of our butter cups have this dynamic with parents . I always wonder what brings listeners to the show , what brings butter cups into the wonderful world of butter cups ?
And I know we're all looking for something and I'm just happy that we're all on the journey together and I think it's more of the journey than the destination , with us and with the listeners . But I got to wonder if there's these through lines , you know , the connectivity of , you know , maybe , a narcissistic parent , or how many people have ADHD ?
Or how many people have , you know , I think everybody's got trauma . So we got that covered . Check , check , check . Welcome to the trauma trauma patrol .
But yeah , I just think it's funny because I look at this and I go wow , wow , I as a just an independent viewer of the show , it's so fun to see something that you completely relate to in the second to the penultimate episode of an entire series , right , and I'm looking and I'm like I don't know if I've ever been Ted or related to Ted more than just one
. As mommy shows up , you know , and I go Jesus Christ , like oh , that is hysterical .
And maybe it was the look that he gave , maybe it was just this general . I mean we've gone over Sudeikis . I mean he truly uses every , every cell of his body to act . It's quite impressive . But it is amazing of all the things that are amazing about this , ted , if nothing else , says not just what's on his mind but what comes to mind .
Right , so you talk to God ? Right , like he's like this . No , he is biting his tongue till it might bleed as this goes through his kitchen cabinets , and it's sort of fascinating to watch him in this mode . Like he's . I don't even know if he knows what he wants to say . He just can't take this anymore . And it's .
He communicates a lot in a little bit of space .
It's a weird . I'm glad you picked that up because it's a weird . I would Okay , this is going to sound crazy . You ready for this ? I would offer that . The butter cups know me better than my mother . Wow , I'm not exaggerating , because because he , I don't think he can say what he wants to say .
Similarly to me , because my mom doesn't want to know the real me , she has not , she has . She has decided that . You know , she wanted a different version of me . She wanted a version of me that is in another multiverse , and so she doesn't hate me . I don't think she , you know , hates my guts or anything but she .
But if I started being me , if I started making the jokes I make on the podcast , if I started being who I am with my friends , she wouldn't understand it . She'd be like well , I don't , I didn't raise you to be this . You know she's not interested in the give and take of what I might be . You know what I mean .
And so I just see that a lot here with Ted it's like he's just biting . She starts out and says pretty sparse . What does that mean ? Pretty sparse , boss ? What do you take from that opening salvo ?
So here's the thing , because I understand the Midwestern mother so well and also because I am lucky enough that I do get to be my full self in front of my mom I believe I've mentioned before about the time I called her the C word at- brunch on Thursday .
How can we forget Tough ? It's not an easy word to forget Charming family .
And she laughed and thought it was hilarious . But this is a weird sort of cutting way of showing concern , in that what she wants to actually convey to him is it seems like you don't have a lot of comfort items and your house is not yours , and that is concerning to me .
But she can't say it in that way , so she wraps it in this sort of barbed wire version of there's not a lot here which can feel insulting , even though she doesn't mean it to be . But she also can't figure out why he would think that it would be insulting .
So piggybacking , that's actually really interesting . You uncork several things there , but one of them is she's charming , but she's quite judgmental , right , because pretty sparse at the gentlest , at the nicest at the . This has no whatever suggests there's a right amount of shit to have in your cabinets and you don't have enough .
It's like well , I live here , I eat what's going to come out of those cabinets . Like how could you possibly judge whether that's enough shit to have in my cabinet ? Like what are we discussing right now ? But she's got an idea in her head like I'm looking and I don't see paprika . So you're living like an animal .
That is true Without paprika . Why go on ? I make enough home fries at home , homemade home fry . I make a mean breakfast here , boss . I'm not going to lie to you , I can make some breakfast up in this , mamma Gemma . But here's the one thing less this become like sort of a portrayal of victimization .
I want to own my side of it and I want to own Ted's side of it , which is you start at some point in your life when you're not meeting up to this type of person's standards . You then get so exasperated with them that you also lock them in to .
All they can say is pretty smart If she came out and said hey , I'm really concerned about you , because everything my mother says to me it doesn't matter . She'll come over , she'll pop in , she'll say oh , the kids are looking good . And I hear it as a criticism . I go compared to what Like , what the ? You didn't like them last time .
It doesn't matter , whatever she says , I will hear it as a criticism and I will react accordingly . Right , so it takes two to tango and specifically in a dynamic like this , she feels trapped as well , and this is where it gets really difficult .
The one thing that I think I'm my son's daddy .
I want you to finish . Oh , is that right ?
Oh my God , I honestly feel like I couldn't say good morning without , in three months , finding out that I made him feel that his love of the night time made him a bad person . I'm like Jesus H Christ . All I said was oh , good morning . So yeah , I hear what you're saying . It's interesting to hear . It cannot be repaired .
Right , but it cannot be repaired by one side . I'm telling you that it can't Right and this is the thing , because I'm not a person who isn't trying to do the work or trying to get better . I don't want to go to the have something . I think my mom's going to live me , but I think she's going to live to 300 years old .
She's so fit and trim , she's in her 70s , she hikes the Appalachian Trail . She's a force of nature , she's like unbelievable , but let's say , god forbid something happens to her .
I've spoken about my father's passing on the show and how , when he died , like he and I were good we're good right now I miss him like crazy , but like he never had a second of his life right up until the end , where he didn't know exactly how I felt about it , you know , and vice versa , there was nothing left unsaid .
If my mom were to go , if you call tomorrow we say , oh , something happened to your mom , there would be a tremendous amount and I try to broach that . I know where that demilitarized zone is and I try to make forays into it , but I get rebuffed because she can't do it . She can't do the other side of it .
So if I come at it from like true , generative , a place of like , trying to connect . She's not , she is just like completely foreign to her and she is again . You think it gets set in your ways when you're our age . You know I'm not add another generation of that .
So I see this here , this dynamic with Ted and Dottie , and it can , it's , it's a kind of it makes me so , it almost makes me itchy , like I'm like God damn like but . But I fully get it and I like , I really like them both . And so as we continue here , you see Dottie start to the three . Actually I love this .
Before you move , yeah , I did this one thing here , as you were describing the dynamic and man , you make me think about a lot of different relationships .
¶ Family Dynamics and Cultural Differences
I'm like , oh yeah , but I think , as you say , that you know both sides and all that Dottie can't Like she actually can't , and I think , like he's probably found some version of what you're describing which is like if I say something , she's going to do this . So that's like what we do . We don't say shit , right , kind of our thing , and so I'm not .
You know , I understand that I'd be ruining it Also , this is torture . But you then have the comparison .
You know , by comparison , you have Jamie's dad , you have Nate's dad , right , people who very much they are happy to , you know , broach all the things and let you see just how you know terribly you've made them feel about you and themselves for making you and all that kind of stuff .
So it's interesting to see how intent plays into both how the child in the story reacts to them , but also how we as an audience react to them , because I got why she was annoying . I mean , I got it , I got it , but I still liked her and I still was like , oh , ted , you know she's your mom .
And I was like that was not at all my reaction to those other stories . Coach , what does that make you think of when you say that ?
Oh yeah , oh no . When I met your mom , I was like she is a delight . That's what everyone says . Seriously , I was like what is like if you say so ? Like I'm not calling you a liar , you know better than I do , but she is a delight , yeah , she's great .
Yep .
So so coach was the beard in this situation .
Yes , I was yes .
I was , I was beard .
Yeah getting told like this sink , you have to do this and make sure you tell them that . And did I tell you this funny story about this time ? Blah , blah , blah blah while we're like bringing stuff in the house and I'm entertained as can be . Yeah , I was 100% , I was beard . Yeah , weirdo beard .
And I should say I absolutely understand why that dynamic exists . I'm not sure if it's because I am a woman and I'm dealing with my mom or if it's something about my personality in particular .
If anybody is looking for advice out there , what I found in my late teens was the best way through that demilitarized zone was to bulldoze as quickly and as forcefully as possible , and not necessarily like saying , hey , I love you , mom , and we should be on better terms , but just like I no longer give a fuck about the uncomfortableness between us and so I'm
going to be wild and eventually , at one point in our good relationship , refer to you as a skeezy hoe , which is another thing that I said about her , and somehow we're still incredibly good friends .
I'm trying to picture what sequence of events could possibly have transpired in life that would have led me to think , then say then survive .
having said , Survival is a legitimate . It's a legitimate concern If I tried that with my mom I would get stabbed . I'm real danger . I am not smiling when I say that's not a punchline . That's what would happen . She would get scissors and put them in my eye . There's no , she is a . She is from the mountains of Greece . Man , this is Spartan woman .
You're not like like a nurse , a true like textbook narcissist who you will not talk that way to or the heavens fall .
Oh , we'll see . Then this is a different situation . Did I have I told about the circumstances leading to me calling my mom , I was aware of the C word store .
Give me a second to pop some popcorn here . No , no , no .
Sure , it's very . This one is actually very quick . I can't remember we were going to Chicago . We lived in Aurora . We were visiting family in Chicago .
It was me , my mom , I believe , maybe a cousin , I can't remember exactly , but my younger brother was there for sure , and I can't remember what it was that my mom said , but as a joke , I said oh well , come on , that's because you're a skeezy hoe . Like , maybe it was because she had children when she was younger , whatever it was . But I was teasing .
I was like oh , you're a skeezy hoe , come on , give me your break . And she said Well , that is just your opinion . And my younger brother from the back seat said no , kathy , you're a skeezy hoe . And she said hey , don't call me Kathy .
And I swear to God that was it , you guys are . There is something wildly misaligned in your genetic code .
All of you . I feel like this is a series Like . I feel like we should be deep diving this series . Yeah , no , we really should .
We get Ellen on the show and just peel the onion a little bit I trust her judgment I just don't understand your skeezy .
hoe , don't call me Kathy .
Hey , don't call me Kathy , that's what she was like .
Well , okay , so this is perfect , the perfect segue , figuring out the encoding of your family . We have Ted saying sorry . We have Dottie saying what are all these crazy symbols in your oven dial ? And we've talked about this many times .
This is just a quick aside , but I love the difference between you know , like when you call up European things to Americans and oh , this is so foreign and goes back to Royale with cheese and pulp fiction all these all these . so it's so fascinating , the wild differences in Europe .
¶ Family Dynamics and Personal Vulnerabilities
But I really love the delivery of this line Because , like I said , we always try to stay protected with a dangerous parent . But he , he says , yeah , well , the one with the line under the nuclear power symbol , that's for making cookies and chicken . Like he had to go figure this out right .
I love the thought of him staring at the nuclear power symbol goes All right , I'm gonna try some . I'm gonna try some pancakes , or you know whatever . Obviously you're not gonna bake pancakes , but whatever , he's gonna try something .
You know what he , you know how he learned that one . Yes , we know how he learned that one . Right , that was the first one he learned , that's right , that's right .
This gets the boss right . The three squiggly lines let you , let you burn a frozen pizza . That's what they let you do , which is , I think , incredibly good writing . I really love the writing on this and the key symbol there that makes the whole thing beep until beard comes over and fixes it . For me Is everything okay , mom . It is so well .
The cadence of this is is is outstanding because you can see he's distracted , so it's almost like he lets his guard down to tell you the truth about the dials and gives some it's a real glimpse into his personal life . You know , because , like how many , how many pizzas do you have to burn before you , before you establish ? You know what ?
That's what that is . The three squiggly lines that you burn burn a frozen . They don't cook it , they burn it .
Burn it . That's how that works .
One thing I'll toss in here and I didn't think of it this way , like I thought about the , like the commenting on the sparse and all that , but I will say this is a thing of mine , like the idea that people I remember when I first found out like it might have been truly like the gotta get away commercial , where the lady like opens the medicine cabinet and
everything crashes down , and maybe it was before that . But when I found out that there are people who go to other people's houses and look in the fucking medicine ca , I was like they do what ? Like it wasn't like I was offended so much as I was like I don't , I don't get it . Like I could have lived 200 years and it would never have occurred to me .
Well , I'm in here , let's just see what they've got behind this little mirror here .
Wonder what they're trying to hide from me .
Right . And so there's something like about yes , he's giving her this glimpse , but she's she's making him vulnerable , like when we share , right , when I tell my story , you tell your story . We're choosing to be vulnerable , we're accepting each other that way . She's like hey , let me see , hey , you really should be washing your underwear better .
Like , god damn , like .
Well , no , no , no , no , no . There's no mutuality . You make an amazing point , coach . There is no mutuality . And and , furthermore , we're going to get to the point where we see very clearly what a hypocrite daddy is , because she will lament her son's ability to help everyone around him .
I know not take anything for herself , right .
Or not take anything for himself . And she , that's all she does too . Listen , let's let's pivot really fast while we say this she comes in , she comes in . Let's put ourselves in daddy's shoes and let's pretend daddy's daddy's a good people , right ? Not that she isn't , but let's like let's just exonerate her off the bat , right ? She comes in .
She's worried about her son . She looks around . There's nothing in the cabinets . He's living like a , like a , not a vagabond . He's living like a , like a transient , like like this is a . This is a hotel room . It's not gonna feel like a home . Doesn't have that home ? Feel right ? She asks him one simple . He's obviously distracted .
I don't know why he's acting like a weirdo right now because I'm not saying anything , okay .
He's just really like .
What's he so nervous about ? Like , yeah , settle down , right , I just got here . He's already acting weird , like he did when he was a little boy , right , and then right . And then she says a simple question I don't know what your European stove does .
And the thing I get from that is that all the dude makes is cookies , chicken , and he burns pizzas , and he's not capable enough to figure out what another button does . He has to call his buddy to come over and fix it for him . Can you stop the beeping here ? Yeah , what ?
This boy is a person in trouble right now , right From daddy's perspective , is everything okay , mom ? Oh , sure , I'm just looking around .
You know it's funny as you're describing this . It reminds me and there's a divergence I think matters it reminds me of when Ted had to take Dr Sharon back to her place after the accident and he starts talking around and it's like yikes , like it was like a yikes one . But what he said was well , why don't we just call it comfortable ?
Or maybe I'll double check a little bit . There's something like why don't we just call it comfortable and leave it at that ? And he left it at that . He didn't go . He noticed the bottles but he didn't say God damn , you've been doing some drinking huh , but he did by saying something .
He did say that he let her off the hook , but he didn't not notice it . Let's just call it comfortable . We could call it you're a drunk , but we'll call it comfortable .
I mean , I see what you said , and not that he had a better option .
I'm not doing nothing for it , but I don't think Dr Sharon was ready to have him in her place . In her what do you call it ? Like her sacrum ? No , not sacrum . Sanktum , sanktum .
Not sacrum , that's a whole other .
I'm pretty sure she was not . She was not is not and will not .
That's a real boss level comment right there .
You must think you'd trade with Dr Jake .
It's not funny , coach . God , that's malpractice , all right , so we go . Here we go . So everything came up . Sure , just looking around , the innocence can be . No , no , I mean you've been here in London , is everything okay ? Oh yeah , everything's fine . I just always want to see England .
So I booked this trip as a Little Mother's Day gift to myself , because no other . On Mother's Day , you tend to get presents from your children , and I ain't gonna get one from any of my , I got that too .
I was like , oh my God , like okay , passive , aggressive , yeah , yeah , yeah , I definitely got that .
That's my mother's gift . She did it with a Greek accent , though she's like . I spent Mother's Day thanking Jesus for my wonderful children . Oh , you did . You're thanking Jesus , huh , for your kids , who never called you on . I do call her . It's not like I'm not gonna call her . I do all the normal stuff , but she doesn't like it .
If I send her flowers , she goes why do you spend so much money on something that would die ? Okay , great . So now I have a little trick , which she likes little things Like boss . Boss likes little things too , like little tiny things . Right , boss Like miniature . Yeah , yes , mini-chirps . So if I see a little tiny , like I've got her .
There was like a Somewhere in my travels there was a screwdriver like this , big like the size of your knuckle , and I got her that and a little . There was a little tiny vase with a little cap thing that went in it and she was thrilled , absolutely thrilled . So it's like , okay , I'll just get her a little tiny , but that's it .
But she's like I hope you didn't spend much money on this because it's not worth it . I'm like , okay , great , thank you , like you're welcome . But , um , right , book this trip as a little Mother's Day gift to myself . Okay , well , I mean how long you've been here . She says what , coach ? Just a week , just a week , a week ? Where the heck are you staying ?
Where's she staying , coach ?
It's a adorable little hostel Mom . Now I met so many Australians . They are backpacking through Europe . So much sex Mom .
God so much . No , not me . I'm like oh , not me . The Australians , no , no , I get it Okay . So this is like , um , this is like if Boss is your mom , maybe , or something like that , where , like , she's just open about certain things .
Right , Like she's no Maybe .
Yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , Because he's the one that's uncomfortable . Boss , you're just saying you just plow right through the boundary , you don't care . It's amazing because you make amazing boundaries for everybody else . I feel like I live in a fucking cage working with you and and you feel more just super comfortable plowing through everybody else's boundaries .
I'm sure there's a word for that , Boss . I just don't want to say it on the air .
You know . So I literally was just thinking that Ted does the same thing to other people that his mom does to him . He knows that he gets annoyed by his mom doing that , but he still does that .
So I definitely do have significant boundaries about what I expect from people , but in terms of like asking questions , interactions , conversations I'm my mom does that too .
Kathy is just like that , like she will be the one that I think one time when I was in high school younger , young in high school I think my sister was maybe a senior , but I might have been younger than that , so I would have been like 13 , 14 .
A bunch of us , including some of my older sister's friends , went to watch the fireworks on 4th of July and they have like the big ones that explode and then they turn shimmery and start like sort of shaking on the way down and my mom shouts like literally shouts over the sound of the fireworks . Oh , it looks like sperm .
Wait , what , what ?
Yeah , yeah , she had her five children with her . And her children had some friends and we were teenagers . Some of us were teenagers . The guys that were with us were teenage boys and she shouted oh , it looks like sperm .
Yeah , I'm speechless . That's amazing Wow .
Episode three is going to be hilarious . That's going to be . That's what we . That's what like from here is just straight from here to the Emmys .
Yes , yeah , no . So like I think , in a way , that I do that with other people , where , like , whatever boundaries I have , I'm just going to like make the sex joke I think I got from my mom . Well , I think I got the sex joke from my mom .
I think she realized I want to get to a point where there's a very clear moment where Ted looks at his mom like she's got three heads , when she's talking exactly the way that he talks . Yeah .
And you go . What the f that looks foreign to you dumbass .
Yeah , yeah , it's amazing , it's amazing Because I'm telling we talked about this on the rapid response I felt and I'd be very curious . There's so many things I really would just want to ask them directly if we could do that , and one of them is did you just write Ted lines and then write and put Dottie's character name over them ?
I think that would be the actual assignment . It was ex , I mean , it was Ted , it was astound even the way she's interacting with him and I love it . But here's a question I have around Dottie and the so much sex and whatever . Is this her hopping over his fences ? I'm asking , I really don't , I'm really asking that question .
I didn't see that . Whatever it could be , it could be , but I didn't see it .
No , it wasn't my initial reaction .
¶ Manipulation and Inconvenience Through Language
She's like I'm a firebrand and I just say it like it is and that's my identity and I don't care who's listening . So like , so much sex . Like , oh wait , sex is taboo subject . You can see you're saying that about religion or politics or whatever . Like I don't even know why you vote Democrat . That's crazy , you know like . You know like that's just who .
I . I just call it .
I think that's her personal brand , and so Ted is like mom , like he knows it's coming , he could have like sniffed it in the air . Here she goes , but now here's the thing I want . Oh wait , boss , are you going to say something about that ? Okay , all right . So , thank God , no , I wasn't . I wasn't all that interested . But yeah , okay , good .
You're not prepared for whatever my next Kathy story is , I don't have one off hand right now .
I just know . All I was going to say was the next little segment in this is we talk about ? I don't know what it means in this day and age , in this , the version of the world that we're in . I've spent yesterday writing about the depravity of the president of the Spanish soccer federation over on Pagiba . Yeah , you should .
I do the whole thing so you can follow it , so you know the whole thing and you can catch as you read it . It's an explainer that gets you from A to all the way to Z or wherever we are . We're not quite in Z yet . I talk a lot about Coach and I trying to be quote unquote good boys .
We try to be good boys and boss smiles at that because she's not interested in hanging out with good boys . She likes people that are shitty and talk down to her and have an edge . But she picked the two wrong podcast partners because Coach and I really really do try to do that , and I see that in Ted right here because it kind of kills him .
I would do the exact same . There's no , I will tell you my mom , I've said it she drives me absolutely crazy . But if I'm in Europe , in a city , and I hear she's in a hospital . That shit would not fly with me Because she's raised me better than that , like even though she's totally destroyed 96% of how she raised me , at least on one level .
I would be like , no , you're not . Like my mother is not staying . This is like a core value thing I would never . So he says , look , how about you just stay here for the rest of your trip , all right , like he almost doesn't have a choice because , right , coach , can you imagine not ?
like it's a foregone conclusion what are we even discussing ? Like I have felt self-conscious about there being too many people coming for whatever event and some people having to stay at hotels . Like I have apologized profusely that we just , you know , don't have enough space .
Oh , if I end up , you know , like , so , yeah , the idea that like , oh , you're staying in some hostel , cool , I don't have to make a bed .
Great , like that would be insane , Plus doesn't affect you , right ? I'm guessing that you'd be like okay , if you want to be there , that's okay .
Well , if it were a hostel . So I should also say I did pick up on a lot of Midwestern .
Her saying so much sex was a way of pushing the taboo that she's not supposed to talk about sex , while also letting Ted know the situation is not ideal because there are people having sex in the room with her , while also then saying to him like oh well , come on , it's not me , like don't , don't get all crude on me now .
So she's playing a lot of angles by saying this like it's totally fine , except of course it's not fine , but you shouldn't be upset that I didn't find it totally fine .
I think that's exactly right .
Yeah , that's great , and there's so many layers to this , so I don't want us to get stuck here . But I'm curious and truly like maybe one of you has insight on this what , when we do things , we get something out of the thing we're doing , right ? This is all like basic therapy , right ?
So what is what is accomplished by inconveniencing yourself in the name of not imposing on the other person , then making them acutely aware of your discomfort , Like , in a way , if I'm Ted now , I feel like somehow I didn't even know you were in fucking London and I'm the guy who had his mom staying at a goddamn hospital for a week , like I'd be annoyed about
that . But I'm trying to process , like , but on the other side of that , what is it they are either trying to accomplish or don't realize , like , what's the hit you're getting , what's the ? Yeah ?
I think it is a way of removing the vulnerability from asking somebody for something . So she gets to come to London and do things the way that she wants to , and she's going to stay in the hostel if she feels like it .
And then when he finds out about it because she is sitting outside of his apartment , he gets to then insist that she has to say at his place because he couldn't not , and then she gets to be able to enjoy staying at her son's place without having to ask him for it Right ?
Well , only if it's no trouble .
Language plays out with different people . I mean , I have friends . I grew up . I don't have that many people in my life like this anymore , but I had a couple of friends in college who viewed every interaction as a battle , like a Sun-Zoo level battle . It was really exhausting to be around , but that's how they were raised .
In my family I know I like there are certain people who are . I just think it's amazing how quickly the human mind can think and process . So it's like Dottie doesn't even know necessarily that she's doing this , but it's like a version of narcissism where there's a word for it too .
There's actually like a textbook version of this type of like a covert narcissist . That's what it is when the presentation is I'm doing everything for everybody else , but really you're doing it to get them to do what you want . It's just using different levers to manipulate for the outcome that you desire . So that is exactly bosses picked up on .
Okay , I'm just going to say this because it's really uncomfortable . I'd rather stay here , and she knows that that's the mechanism that's going to get him to do that
¶ Managing Manipulative Relationships
, but it's . It can be exhausting to be around someone where every single thing they say has a hidden meaning or has a , you can feel the strength right when they're , like every , it doesn't matter , they can't help it . Everything they say is designed to get you to do something or feel something or move you in a direction .
And some of the most abusive domestic partners , whatever the worst gas slaters in the world , they don't . I'm not saying it's not , they're not aware of it , but they will . The long con is on with them from the beginning , from the get go . You know what I mean .
It's all designed to get you , almost in a predatory fashion , into a place where you are prey and they can manipulate you in a certain way and the level of danger varies . But in this case , dottie is going to basically get to stay here , and so it's like well , look , how about you stay for the ship ?
All right , she says only if I'm not a hassle , like she is a . It was a hassle seeing you on the bench . It was a hassle seeing you look at my , like you have not been anything but a hassle since you got here and now this is a right Now , this is a hassle .
You stay here .
Yes , that's a triple . It's the biggest possible hassle , because we have certain people in our lives that just ruffle our feathers , and fathers and mothers in , specifically , if they're not aligned with who you are , or they're not aligned with the result of their rearing , if it didn't shake out the way that they tried to manipulate it to shake out .
It's that much more uncomfortable because now you're around that disjointed sort of you know , disconnection that you have between their expectation and the reality of your situation . So he has to say you're not a hassle , mom . Okay , like , oh , it's such a drag to lie . What's he gonna do ?
If he says you're a hassle , she's not going to stay there , she's going to go back to the hostel , he's going to feel terrible about it . It's going to be a thing he knows this , he's done this his whole life If he tells her the truth and doesn't just gloss over it , right ? So , okay , please stay here . Okay , okay , good , all right , no , look .
I have to get to work . Alrighty , have fun . And then he pauses . Pause . Is shaking her head .
She's literally shaking her head because yes , yeah , I need the thought bubble on that one . Sorry , that was good .
I mean there's nothing to it other than okay , have fun . Like that is such a . It's such a way of still talking to your little kid Like all right , mom , I'm going out to play , she's like okay have fun . He's like well , no , I'm going to do my job .
It's work .
Like you might say like have a good day to your spouse , or to a grownup or somebody else , or like okay , well , I'll see you tonight . But you don't say , okay , have fun . Like that's , that is what you say to a child .
That's how she sees them so well . I don't want to be in your he says okay you want to tag along . Why don't I be in your hair , mom ? I want you in my hair . Okay , again , again . What choice does he have , coach ? None , he has . No , no , no choice here . I want you and my friends and co-workers here Now . Please come with you . Don't have a timeline .
It doesn't want to be late . Okay , good , thank you . I would like that . Of course you would , because you engineered this outcome . We both know it .
Right , you show up on my way to work . You show up .
Yeah , you don't have to bring your suitcase , mom . Okay , that's great , that was great .
Get my bag with her orange suitcase and her green jacket . Oh really coach .
I don't think we've seen that before , coach , so I'll get my bag . Leave my worries on the doorstep . Yeah , just direct your feet that way , mom . Okay .
Okay , this was like there . Yes , throughout this we're doing the . Oh my God , ted's mom , is Ted Like that whole thing when she starts with the sing songy and rather than join in which , for a split second , was what I expected . I expected some sort of weird oh , this is what they do , right , right , right .
And that he was I mean he , almost he was like Roy level annoyed by this behavior and I thought it was like I don't know , I thought it was fascinating . I would offer he like gives it , he like does a little prayer thing Like he's like . Please help me get through this .
Yes , yes , Amen , I don't think there is . I think that what happens when you get to this point ? There is no thing that we do . I actually think that really , if you had a thing that you do . You would default to it and you could build from it , but you're so you have diverged completely .
That that , where you can't even find where the fork in the road is , you can't find the last common ancestor in the family tree because there's no . It is , it is . It is so triggering to watch . I'm telling you this is like literally , why not just follow me around with the camera ? This is what it looks like . It's amazing , it's so crazy .
Yeah .
And I go . Please , god help me . I sit and I'm a pretty upbeat dude . I think I would qualify as a happy person . I try to try to bring joy to people . I try to always be in a good place and make things better wherever I go . It's only only when my mom comes around where I get like Ted , I get quiet .
My kids are like what is going on with dad , like I get real guarded .
It's like you know , because it's it's trauma , it's a trauma response and you have learned the hard way and I mean in my case , the really hard way that you are not safe around this person and no matter how much you on one side want to change it , because the dynamic can't change , because it's not a two way street .
You've also learned it's better to choose that than but you also can . You want to be a good boy and you want to try to be kind and thoughtful and hope things get better and you're an optimist . It's exactly what Ted is doing and the whole thing . And yeah , he can't join in on the sing songy stuff because for him it's like a fork on a chalkboard .
It is , it is torture . But yeah , I love that you point that out , coach . So direct your feet . Yeah , when he does the prayer thing and he covers his face , like , oh , like , help me Jesus . How seriously .
I've been with her for a minute .
No , he yeah yeah , he .
there's no way I make it to the end of this day . I'm going to die , oh my God .
And also you can anticipate exactly what's going to happen . I've had to coach my mom . I would say like , hey , this is a funeral of my whatever . Please don't go in and scream hello to everybody and make joke like I've had to like . And then she of course , you're getting insulted . Why would you think I would do that ? It's disgusting that you think that .
Don't talk to me about that . I know better than you about the rules . You know you're like . Oh , okay , all right , like , but you experienced it , you know I mean . So you're like that's the whole thing . He's like like he can , he can project forward and and he knows how this day is going to go . So who we ?
We get out , we get a little establishing shot of Nelson Road and now we are in a press conference . Boss , can you walk us through this press conference please ?
Yeah , absolutely so . It is Sam , roy and Jamie . I'm a little talking to the press . I don't know if we have seen the three of them interact a lot since season one . I was trying to think when I was rewatching it the other night , right Like I know that there's been a lot of Sam and Jamie and Jamie and Roy .
I haven't seen a lot of Roy and Sam . Yeah , that's right .
Well , I mean , it's just . It occurred to me especially , I think , last podcast we discussed how Jamie and Rebecca don't have a lot of interaction either , and trying to think of which who is hanging out and who is not , and what that means about the show or what we just noticed , because we want everybody hanging out Anyway .
So we cut in and they're saying that Sam Ritzman have won 15 matches in a row . With two games left , you're just four points off Manchester City for the Premier League . So trying to establish where we are in the season , since we haven't touched base with the touch base , I shouldn't have said that that's a different sport .
You really fumbled that one boss .
Sports metaphor . There we go from from deep in the deep .
Yes , One more and you get a free stick .
It's right . That's right From where .
Because , I'm not going after just any steak .
That place across the street the bougie place it is .
Well , it's not really bougie and it's closed on Monday nights , but steak is brown food , so that would fit with us .
Do you have a question ? That I now only eat brown food ? Okay ?
I'm going to just whisper to the audibly so you can hear he only eats brown food .
Oh Lord . So Sam replies . Do you have a question echoing back to first press conference ? Ted and Trent , I'm going to say only this time it is yeah , am I dreaming ? So apparently even the press corps in this situation has been . I really like that .
And he's so handsome , dear God , like if . Sam is your jam at all like I like if you , if you're like , oh , I'm kind of in love with Sam Joey Jimmo , like if you , if you're kind of in love with him . Every time he smiles it kind of lights up the room . And like if Ted Lasso has ended for you and there's not not enough of him out there .
I know he did some other role where he played like a hard ass or something like a . Yeah , then there's some other movie that he was in I just saw and I wasn't interested in it because I'm like , no , I want Sam Obisanya . But yeah , I feel for you because he's a man , he's a beautiful , he's a beautiful man .
It really is like he's got , he's got many , many facets to him that I could see people being like I love that , I love that , I love that , you know . So he's kind of tremendous .
It's true . I would recommend following his Instagram in that case , but Sam's response is well , if you are , please don't wake up , and if this is the matrix , don't unplug me . Which felt again like a Ted beat , like adding pop culture reference . After that , yep , exactly , roy again signals yeah , better , trent , and he says Marco Sadavio At a bio ?
Yeah , no , at a bio , but also at a bio , wasn't , thankfully ? Like not everybody said the independent together .
Yeah .
Thank God , we're done with that . Yes , thank you .
¶ Jamie's Changing Demeanor and Roy's Defense
All you have to do is just throw her back to season two a little bit . Look at her mood . Look at her Her shoulders dropped , she's everything , everything changed . Everything changed . She's so salty Salty person . Look at her Terrible .
Yeah , it's true , it's really , it's really true . I am somebody reminded me of the other day that during season two I tweeted something about how I said in one of the episodes my demeanor is miserable but my actual mood is not , and sometimes season two it just gets me , gets me right in , right in the miserableness .
Anyway , marcus says , jamie , on the heels of making your England debut , how does it feel to be named Premier League player of the month ?
And he says , yeah , it feels good , I guess , but it's really really the team making me look good so I should be doing a better job of making them look good and makes me feel , makes me feel bad , which is not the Jamie that we know , that was like not just not first season Jamie , but not the Jamie .
Also like the eye lines like his , where his sight is going , his cadence of his speech . There's like some introspection , where he's actually trying to figure out how he feels . It's not like a canned response which is like yeah .
I'm on me . Why would I want ?
to be anyone else . He's completely transported into another sort of sort of type of demeanor , which is , yeah , it makes me feel bad and there's a lot of murmuring on that , or I feel like , wait , wait , huh . Like did I hear that right To which ? Who comes into defending ? Us His best friend in the whole world .
I'm talking Roy Kent , his best friend , who needs to show up for Uncle's Day . Roy says very emphatically Jamie also led the league and assists this month , so he's done plenty to make his teammates look good , but yeah , they're the ones who all look like the shit .
Took all shots .
Yeah , our program that does the close captioning , wants to make sure that shots has a asterisks in there . Over the , over the oh .
Yeah .
As one does .
Only , of course , that makes me think shit , because this is , this is like how my Siri on my phone knows me so well that when I tried to write the word duck the other day , it auto corrected to fuck . It was like you can't possibly mean that . You definitely , definitely .
I do like that . That's good , that's machine learning . I want to point out this is a complete nothing . We're not going to talk about this , but I really hate Midas shits . I really hate it .
You hate that . That's what was . Yeah , like that . Oh the Midas .
Yeah , yeah , I hate it . Like I was driving and I'm like get them . What's the opposite of Midas touch ? We do too much Ted Lasso , so it's on my mind all the time and it's like oh what's the ? Opposite of Midas touch Midas shits , and I was like I I hate it .
So , anyway , the fact that you said I , I , I , we're not going to , we're not going to .
I'm just . You just had a reaction .
Yeah , I'm just putting a , putting a little pen in it .
Like I just , I just hate it . I hate it , the Midas shits , I hate it . Anyway , when everything bad happens to you , go to boss .
Sure , absolutely . So he says Jamie says yeah , but they're the ones who took all the shots . And he says he , he scored a goal and that was meant to be a pass . You shouldn't count that . That goal is a lie . It should be retracted from the record .
So this is all that goal is a lie , something , something , no , professional footballer has ever said in since the dawn of time . No , no like it is so hard to get a goal , is so impossible to score , you'll never , ever find any professional footballer , man or woman , trying to take a goal off their , off their tally . Never , ever , ever so funny .
I apologize , yeah .
And then , after he gets yeah , he leans forward into the mic in order to make sure they pick up every single word and says I apologize to everyone , especially the kids .
I'm not sure what it says about me . I know that generally my role around here is to , you know , bring a little sunshine . I know I laughed really hard , like like I was cracking up watching him spit out and I was like I'm not 100% clear why I find this so hysterically funny . But like I know the feeling of when you're like everything sucks .
You could not possibly show me something that would make me go oh , but that's sweet , though Like you show me all puppies , I'm like they're all going to grow old and die and then your eyes are going to be broken anyway . And to watch Jamie , you know , icon on the cap , do that ?
You're a real sucker for clinical depression . Humor coach , this is my jam , I am telling you , I want to see you sad and funny . That's really good I was .
I had the same reaction and again I'll say , when we came back to this episode and I knew boss was going to tee off on it , I watched it , just just watched it all the way through , and I was so delighted , I was so charmed . It's amazing that bosses she got that face again . It's terrifying .
But I just laughed out , I kind of forgot about this scene a little bit and so when I went back to watch it again I was like , oh yeah , this was , that was right . He sort of you know , this is Jamie , totally like the opposite of the Jamie tart , you know , like it's like there's no . I remember I used to say icon .
Like right , it's just zips and no snaps , no zips . What did he say ? Graffiti ? Yeah , all that arrogance , misplaced , whatever . It's completely inverted . So he's just eating himself alive from the inside . I apologize to everyone , especially the kids , to which who shuts it down , boss ?
Yeah , roy , that's like that is pretty good damage control from a guy that doesn't have a problem , kind of kicking doors in . That was great . Thanks very much . I mean he just shuts it like what ? Oh , it's so funny , so good . All right , so we cut to the next scene we have . This is this is Ted walking into biscuits with the boss , right ?
And coach , can you walk us through what's going on here ?
Absolutely so . He walks in as one , as he would always do . Hey , boss , oh , hello Ted . She's not surprised to see him , obviously . So this morning I don't just bring biscuits , I also have a very special surprise guest , which , by the way , has layers of meaning in itself , because it ain't just a surprise to you , friend Right . And so , oh how exciting .
To whom do I owe the pleasure ? I'm coach Lasso's new bodyguard . Please keep your hands where I can see them . Ted could just die , which is the floor , would open up and swallow him . He sighs , and then she says I'm just kidding , you can keep them well manicured mits of yours wherever you like
¶ Rebecca's Transformation and Ted's Awkward Encounter
. Now the illiteration in there , yeah , as just a little cherry on top of this assault on poor Ted .
Yeah .
Was just delicious . And then this is the moment that took this episode to a new level for me . I remember the first time oh my God , your Ted's mother , yeah , yeah , so much was accomplished . Yes , right there , yeah , winner , winner , bf Skinner . Like at this point I'm like all right , now you're just fucking showing off .
Now you are just showing off , like that was really excellent , I love you .
You said winner winner BF Skinner . We say winner winner chicken dinner . What do you say , boss ?
You shouldn't , that's what we do when I went on chicken dinner Okay .
Well , I guess I got that's , okay .
I mean I oh , is that where that comes from ?
That's what I was saying , boss , let me tell you something ? Don't talk back to me . When we were talking , I got chicken dinner , all right , all right , sweet , I thought .
I thought I thought Boston was only where Italians in Irish come from , but apparently it's also terrible things .
Yeah , you know , it's really notes . We got a lot . We contained multitudes . Boss , I want to point out that , in addition to all of the exceptional narration that coach just did , you also saw Ted dying with every time Dottie opened her mouth , he put his head back in pain .
He didn't get , he was not able to get a fucking word in edge wise , because she took over the conversation immediately . I also want to say that I just love this version of Rebecca , who is the . To whom do I owe the pleasure ? She's very . She's like a ray of sunlight , like it's unfair , how obviously attractive and beautiful and sort of like .
You know , it's like I think she breaks cameras with with like how much she eats the screen . You know she's like that's . I'm just looking at the framing on this shot right now and I'm like God , she is a knockout , like he just straight up knockout and she smiles and she's kind .
But Old Rebecca first , the first season one , rebecca would not have been , would not have gotten to have this gear where , like if you surprised her in her personal sanctum with somebody that she didn't know was coming , I could see her being a little bit persnickety about it . You know what I mean . But now she's just like this very open book .
Ted is such a safe space for her . She's like she's sort of game in a way that I think she's grown into .
And .
I just really like it .
She has her graces and they've always been there , right but ? But I feel like they've shifted from niceness to kindness .
Yes , yes , performative to authenticity , you're absolutely right . Yes , coach , that's exactly right . She had the social graces .
You're a godsend , Ted Lezard .
Yes , yes , but now she means it and you can , and you can feel it .
Well , so one of the things I want to say is calling back to what Sassy said about Rebecca in episode in season one is that what we were seeing was not her . So it's not that I'm not trying to give Ted credit for pulling her out of whatever that was , but she was in something and had to come out .
Not that she has changed who she is as a person fundamentally . She's become who she was before Rupert Buster .
Yes , 100 percent Right . And then some , and then some . So she didn't just go back , she also , she didn't just fight back , boss . What did she do ?
No , I'm not picking this one up , this is incomplete .
What happened ? Don't fight my son , please stand to me . Don't fight back , fight Forward , boss . Don't you watch this show , boss ?
I mean Jesus age , I've got listen . I had to defragment something . No , no , it's okay , I really get it .
I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , I know , you didn't , you didn't , you didn't react to Olo Misanya the same way I did , the same way coach did .
I know it's okay , it's like I was playing Dungeons and Dragons online the other day with some friends and I saw like a undead , like necromancer kind of thing like , and I was like oh , there's always yeah , yeah , there she is no , no , no , no , no , no , no , no .
That makes sense . I don't really believe in the like girl dad , boy mom type thing . You know that's on the internet a lot . They're like oh , she's such a boy mom , whatever that means . I do think there's something about men that respond to Ola that I haven't heard any woman and buttercups listeners , everybody else , oh buttercups is simple .
Please feel free to leave me . Oh , let's pray , no .
I did find this interesting .
That's wrong , that's interesting .
Yeah , I'm not saying that I didn't like him or he didn't think he was great , but there was no . It's like field of dreams Like I . You guys love it . It touches something deep inside you that just either I don't have or it doesn't get there , or whatever . It is Like . I think he's great , but I don't need him to snuggle me until .
I go to sleep . I can't believe , coach , if I said touch something deep inside me , you would never let me get away with that . And yet you , just you just gloss over it . You just , this is a very unfair podcast . That's all I'm saying .
Well , somebody has to be the racist and somebody has to be the sexist . That's true , somebody has to be the crude . I get it . We have our roles . We have our roles .
I want to point out that again , pointing out Ted's physicality in this , the choices , the physical acting choices Sudeikis makes . He's got his hands in his pocket . He shakes his head when Dottie says you can put those , those myths everywhere , like he just cannot take it . Because he goes to answer the question .
He actually gestures with his thumb like hey , and Dottie just takes over . Which is what this ? It's so perfect , it's exactly what she would do , exactly what she did . He's actually what he knew and right away his hands go right into his pocket .
He was making a gesture which is like an overt , open sort of posture and closes right up , hands go directly into pockets , arms are pressed against his sides , chin goes down and he starts shaking his head , like immediately , he's like humiliating , and I'm like this is a riot .
And of course , oh my God , your Ted's mother , like there's no doubt in Rebecca's mother she's not like , oh , you're his aunt , oh yeah , no , right , no , no , no , no , yeah , no , no , no .
This is like apple tree got it , oh my .
God .
That's it .
That's so great . Yeah , keep going , coach , please .
So . So Rebecca comes around the desk very excited . Mom , this is my boss , rebecca Welton . Rebecca , this is Dottie Lasso . Rebecca , because she's got all the graces goes for the handshake to begin and Dottie Lasso's oh honey , bring that in . So even you're already extending past what you would normally do , which is just to say hello to me .
You're extending your hand and I'm like nope , nope , nope , nope , nope , we're going to take it way past there . I'm hopping over all the fences , yeah .
We're hugging . This is a trick that they do . This is not a . This is not . This is like really . I'm actually really keying into this right now because this is Ted's boss , this is his place of business . She does not know her intent , are not close enough for her to have any understanding of the dynamic between him .
Right and like and this has happened like where my mom would come visit me at college and hug my professors or something like , oh my God , like , but they would . They would again like you coach , they'd go what a firecracker . Wow , she's a spitfire . You know she's a real and I'm like dying , like dying .
I haven't , of course , I don't eat , it's not what I would you know what I mean .
Like I hang out with them three times a week or whatever .
You know I'm like I don't . It is a real breach of etiquette in my mind and it makes me angry to see it . But that's again . That's just the trauma . I think the headline folks go ahead , boss , what were you going to ?
say Well , just that . It's actually funny to me how uncomfortable Ted is in this scene , because anybody watching the scene would know Rebecca is fine and charmed and thinks daddy is great . In the same way when they're down in the locker room I don't want a time travel .
But in the next scene everybody's charmed by her , everybody thinks it's great , like Ted is wanting to peel his skin off , but everybody else is like oh , your mom seems really wonderful . Like this is not that daddy is out of place .
This is that Ted and daddy are too close to fit together , like they're too much the same and they can't figure out how to line those pieces up so that they don't parade at each other .
Okay , yeah , I want to explore . I want to explore . Yes , okay , I'll take that . Okay , yes , yes and no , no , no , yes and poor , poor coach .
Coach is going to be like I'm going to need five sessions .
Yeah , yeah , no , really I'm going to need some time with that .
I'm going to need some time with that this is what they do very well , because he doesn't get to be Ted Lasso when she's around and that's the heart she takes on his identity . That's right . That's right , she and him , because they have a similar right , he doesn't get to be Ted Lasso , and this is where he is , ted Lasso .
Richman doesn't function . He's the most Ted Lasso .
Right , exactly Him coaching . You know , here and the Wichita State Shockers are the two places he is peak , ted Lasso , and now she has taken his superpower and completely it just it obliviates it and so , yeah , that's a big part of it . Let's , let's .
I want to set coach up for a honey , bring that in and we get the line where I , where I felt one of the worst things I ever felt for the Ted Beckett truth . There's , comes up here , coach , what's the next line ?
I can't believe I'm finally getting to meet the woman who created one of the nicest human beings I've ever met . Now that I had an interesting reaction to that line because nice bothered me . But I thought about it and I was like I think that's me imposing my nice kind thing in a way that isn't true to who Rebecca is .
I don't think Rebecca is making a distinction of like oh , your son says the nice things but he's not truly kind , right , but like . So I think the line , I think the line is better than my reaction to it would have suggested because it did bother me . But I was like no , it works , it's right .
I feel like there's a difference between oh , she's nice and she is the nicest person I've ever met , and those two things are different also . It's not just nice and kind . Somebody is nice . That could also be fun .
Niceest is like yeah there's a type of woman type of person , but specifically I'm bringing up an example with women , both of which involve Kevin Costner in a strange way . So I'm this type of person . I don't boss , seem . She's like she knows what she's going
¶ Pop Culture and Personal Reactions
to do . I always talk about how this show is referential to bull Durham . There's a scene in bull Durham where Nuclele says to Annie that she is . He says no , I think you're real nice . And she goes nice . No , no , sorry . He says I think you're real cute . Yeah , I think you're real cute and she's a cute . She's like baby ducks are cute .
I want to be exotic and interesting and whatever . She's right . And that was a Kevin Costner movie . And then also there was a scene from so it was God , I don't remember what it's called the Madonna movie , where it was like behind the scenes when Madonna was at the top of her game and it was like you follow her on tour .
Oh the truth or dare .
There you go .
And Kevin Costner comes in and to like to say congratulations because he was in the audience and you have to do that .
If you're of a certain level , you can go to her show and not come in and say hello , and he tells her that a show is real neat and she like just eviscerates him behind like soon as she's like neat , like it was brutal , because , you know , made him look like a complete dildo .
You know whatever , but he was trying to be nice for him , that was a yeah , it was really neat , Like whatever .
But there are certain type of people who they value their edginess and they do not want to be categorized in the vast , in the center of whatever the human malaise is . They want to be on the edge , they want to be in the fringe . There's no one here on the show the name Emily Chambers .
And his name is yeah , yeah , really , oh no , go ahead and finish the point , but I'm going to share something in a moment because I think this is a really important point . But yeah , guitar guy .
No , no , that's all I was getting to . Was that that that is not something that would appeal to certain women or certain humans ? I know I would not like to be categorized as you know . Maybe not nice to be . Okay , it depends on where it was coming from .
But I just noticed here at this moment , coach , and this is a little bit of a distinction , but I'll say this is where I felt like oh you , poor Ted Beckertruthers , you don't say that about someone .
You want to , you want to jump in bed like Right , see , naked , right , yeah , I over several conversations , so setting up the conversation is really not worth it for the point .
But at one point that's like last weekend I guess , whatever Daphne and I were joking around about , whatever it was or whatever story , I told her and she said to me something like oh my God , you're so weird and kind of . Then I forget what she said after it , but it was clearly like I hope you don't mind me calling you weird .
Essentially I don't remember the exact words , but it was sort of like . I know I just called you weird and not only was I like that's fine , but I remembered another time when we were in a far less pleasant conversation and she said something to me about being normal .
I still can remember the visceral response I had where I was like normal , yeah , yes , like .
I would ever , despite to be .
I was like just slap my face , Like what are we doing here , Normal you ? Know , so it's interesting that like yeah , I do get that peace where . It's like like the last thing I want to be is like 50% grade . Forget that .
Yeah Right , it makes a lot of sense . Oh no , don't look at me . This one popped out and immediately keep going here , coach .
All I can do is thank you for allowing me to do this . This one popped out and immediately asked the doctor if he needed anything . Oh right , and then Ted is so like he is wound , so like a fricking spring at this point he goes . That doesn't make any sense . Babies can't talk , nor do they understand empathy .
And you know , and I would . I laughed so loud at the . Yeah , that was fantastic , fantastic .
All right . He's literally lost his sense of humor .
Right yeah .
And that is 100% . Again some shit . He would say oh yeah , it's like oh well , sorry , the logic of that doesn't work , so I'm not . I'm not going to participate in this .
He takes the time to disprove it , logically , yeah .
Yeah , yeah , like we like in the moment , like either Rebecca or his mother need an explanation of how babies function , or logic like what is happening . So , anyway , I just love this and then this is so painful , this is so painful , coach .
Daddy , I'm sorry may I call you Dottie ?
Sure , if you want me to respond .
Oh my God , I don't know how Ted doesn't spontaneously combust when she says that . Seriously , it is Seriously . I just can't , I can't .
I just love . You know the . You know the gift from um . The movie about the , about your feelings , bing Bong , god damn it . The movie about your feelings oh inside out , inside out , there you go , damn damn .
I knew that one , I knew it .
I knew it . I knew it . That's one of my . One of the things that are in our family . We always joke around about is when people say they knew it when they didn't know it , and we're like you didn't fucking know it . Like it happens the most when it's on Jeopardy . What is the country ? You know , whatever , right , what is what is ?
And the answer is like you know whatever . What is Spain ? Really Turkey ? Oh , I mean , no , spain . I didn't know that . I knew that . I knew it Shut up . You didn't know it .
Anyway , yes , the movie Keep going boss . But no , but it reminded me of the , the gift of the anger characters head like kind of basically like floating up into the air , like that's what I got from Ted . Yes , like this is unbridled . Like this he is a child , he's a six year old , standing next to his embarrassing mommy .
Yes , yes , I love that I'm sorry , I got it boss .
No , just that . I like that you said that I feel like I'm going to touch on that point later in the episode and what it means that Ted himself is so childlike and childish when his wife yes , well , where is he supposed to go ?
I'm sick of you guys judging me . Oh , I'm sorry . What's this ? Can you imagine this fucking thing ? You don't know what I bit to I'm so . This is the end of this fucking podcast . I am sick of it , but listen there's a great shot to that point . You guys both make an excellent point .
To that point , Rebecca you know , she says , um uh , keep going here , coach , and then I'll talk about the moment . I'm talking about Go ahead .
Sure , so , uh , sure , if you want me to respond , right , if you'd like , I'd love to show you around . Oh , I've heard great things about the Sherlock Holmes museum , which I believe we did in the rapid response . That is exactly the misunderstanding that Ted did . Exactly , exactly the same . He asked for Abby Road , like exactly .
I was like oh , my God , I mean around me . Even better , I can't wait to meet Danny Rojas . Oh , and he does not disappoint . I liked that moment . I was surprised that she knew who Danny Rojas was .
Yeah , I was surprised that she knew anything about it oh , okay . That was surprising to me yeah .
Yeah , I guess I didn't think about it . Yeah , it may be right , though , but at any rate I liked that she said it and I liked the way Rebecca said oh , and he does not disappoint , because at that point you may just see your mommy . I know she's a woman and I know she wants to see Danny Rojas up close . They're like yes .
Right .
The energy from Rebecca is not like oh , you're my friend's mom . To me it was like , oh yeah , you do .
I don't know where to look , oh yeah , you do want to see him .
That's weird , that's weird , weird . I really feel like .
Moms don't think that thing . Moms don't think about that . Hello , moms don't think about that . That's weird , this podcast is taking a very very disturbing turn in the last few minutes . Understand what your speed is . I feel like when Castlezen goes back to therapy , he just needs to bring this in and be like just listen .
Exhibit .
A doc .
And then we'll figure it out next week .
This will be the next few recessions . All they do is push my buttons . Yeah , when are you from ?
honey , I'm sorry , sorry , yeah , where are you from Right ? So oh , I thought you said sorry oh .
And now , okay , here's the beat I was talking about . They walk out , ted follows them , and do you see what he does ? Boss , describe his mannerism please , like his physicality , as he follows them . It's like it reminds me of like a tiny , like a , like a . It reminded me of a second grader on the way to school . What does he do with his hands ?
Oh , I will tell you exactly what he's done . Anyone who has watched or has developed knows the gift of George Michael being heartbroken after one of his girlfriends breaks up with him , or maybe , maybe he has a boyfriend whatever it is .
He's heartbroken and he's holding onto his backpack and his head is down and he's walking out and they play the Charlie Brown music in the background and I will post it on Twitter just so that everybody can see it .
But that is exactly what he looks like Hooks his thumbs and his backpack and yeah , it is a sad Charlie Brown . It's amazing we cut immediately to the bane of Ted's existence . His mother is in the Richmond locker room sitting on the very perch where Isaac once cut hair .
The entire team has searched , everybody has circled around her Coach just just sitting on the floor like this is a kindergarten class . Yeah , it's like crisscross . It's fucking circle time .
Yeah , and I'm like what is happening ? Yeah , yeah , no , it's amazing .
Amazing . There isn't a single place where there are not players or Trent in the background watching . And just real . Just from a little math here , coach , just a little statistical analysis when you look at the faces in the room , what percentage of the faces look like they're having the time of their lives ? Just ballpark it .
What percent that would be 100% one .
Everybody , if you freeze frame everybody has a huge smile , everyone's in .
They're all in . She can say literally anything at this moment . They're all like . He calls her Mama Lasso . How long could they possibly have known each other ?
What is happening ? Also , this is the moment that Ted built because of every micro interaction for all these years that there isn't a . It's almost like having a deity , it's almost like a goddess . Come in and what they know about Ted is if you're Danny Rojas , you think about where he came from .
You're Jamie Tartt , if you're Trent , if you , it doesn't matter who had these interactions . Where Ted was the ripple in the pool , where he was the stone that was tossed in , that was the prime mover , right ?
Is there a single better way to show your respect for this man , whom you respect more than anything , than to like give your unbroken attention to his mother , right you ?
just adoration , because it's not just like oh , she speaks , we should listen , that's polite , it's . We are enraptured . Please don't ever stop telling stories . Let this moment last forever . Like they are , you know just they're doting on Dottie , but yeah , like they're really like there .
All right , that one got me there , you go you didn't even see that cover in Concoach . You were busy watching the boss left and got hit with the coach . That's it , that's what happened .
I'm just swimming in what feels like a pool of trauma , like barely treading water .
Well , yeah , and I get some alliteration that I never wanted .
So thank you , coach .
You started the episode talking about the difficulties with your mother , so two of your closest friends in the world thought we ought to poke this bruise , just real , as hard as we can .
I really appreciate that . I really , I really , I think you guys are doing a great job . You're doing a great job .
Hey , thanks . I just want to point out that , going along with what coach just said about the people in Ted's life showing respect to Ted by being kind and paying attention to his mother , show that if things had broken slightly different at some point along the way , ted and Dottie could have been an unstoppable force to gather . Like they get along .
They have the same effect on people enough that they could have if they had been able to get along together . If the two of them didn't have to butt heads , they could have taken over the world .
I have . I have a question first and then something that I think just sort of pieced together for me . Ted was 15 when his dad right , Doesn't he say every son he played darts every Sunday till he was 15 years old . Yeah , Okay .
I thought it was 16 , but I could be , I might be . Maybe it was 60 , because those were the two .
Those were the two numbers I was kind of bouncing back and forth this week , but at any rate , that ballpark right , Think about you're in high school and next to your mom in front of your friends
¶ Teddy's Relationship With His Parents
. I don't care how wonderful , you're like blue Ivy one day is going to turn around and be like , oh my God , they're so embarrassing . Like her parents are literally Jay-Z and Beyonce . And one day she's going to be like oh yeah , they had to come . Like hiding her face , right , Because that's just what it is .
Blue Ivy would be the child of Jay-Z and Beyonce .
Jay-z , beyonce .
I'm sorry she wanted to double check for those of us who I live in a world where , even knowing that , I'm regarded as an ignoramus when it comes to Beyonce , but I can't tell you you know everything about her . But so , yes , but for those who don't know this , blue Ivy is a , yes , child of Jay-Z and Beyonce . And we keep talking .
We have talked about trauma , how we will have a part of ourselves . We leave at the moment of the trauma , right , can that be true , for a relationship is part of what we're seeing here , cause I said six . But actually , what if ?
And it's funny , cause they say that teenagers and top like kids do the same thing again , like plus 10 years , which I think is fascinating and actually kind of true .
But on some level , were we actually watching a 16 year old stand next to his mother and having to bring her to school , right , and like , or she's going on the trip with the class , or whatever it is Like , oh my God , I could die .
Oh , absolutely . I think that that's exactly what's happening here .
I think that in a lot and I'm not going to pretend to be an expert on functional relationships with parents across the board I will say , though , I think that there is a part that gets stuck whenever there is trauma , and he was never able to reconcile his relationships with either of his parents .
Like when you're 16 , I double checked he was 16 . Right .
So when he was 16 , he lost his dad , has never processed his relationship with his dad , like has never worked through any of that , and also stopped developing a relationship with his mom at the same age , I think also like logistically he was 16 , probably pulling away , probably starting to rebel and differentiate himself from his parents because that's developmentally
appropriate , and then , two weeks , two years after that , went to college .
I'm assuming went away to college . So like he had , two years with his mom .
Right , yeah . So like I think that in a lot of relationships you have these milestones where you could get into a certain dynamic and I think they're fluid , I think they change over time where you could bounce back and forth across these different ages with your parents I don't think that he's ever gotten past 16 either of his parents .
Yeah , that feels right , and I was kind of like circling this , but this exchange kind of like brought it all together for me because it's very much that reaction , like it's very like .
Yeah , all right , like I get that your mom's like coach talks about his reaction and it's real and we talked about it then , but he didn't like stop functioning when his mom was like you know what I mean , like we were all setting up for that Right . Whatever , you know he talked to me about it later .
You know we talked , but you know , but Ted really is like out of sorts , like he's not okay , he's not Ted , yeah , and he's Teddy .
Right , yes , yep , he is Teddy here , yep , and I think that there's always things with your parents .
Teddy broke . Teddy broke . Yeah , he's Teddy , teddy broke .
I feel like your parents could always do this thing where they trigger you to where you feel like a certain age . If they do a weird thing , you're like oh my God , you that is , I am 18 . What are you doing ? Why is this happening ? But I don't think his is being triggered .
I think he just is that with her and can't , doesn't know how to break out of it .
Yeah , no , it's true . Yeah , I know as a father I try everything I can to recognize those moments and then destroy them immediately so they can't take root . You know like , if I feel like an awkward , I'll call it out . I'll say , oh my God , were you thinking this ? Because this , you know my kids , it drives them crazy in the exact moment .
And then they're relieved because then there's no awkwardness around it . But I'm going to zip through this quickly Because I know what the place I want to get to before we're done today , and so I'm going to blast us through and then we can talk about it as we go . So we cut to . Oh well , we say so . I say , officer , you must be mistaken .
You couldn't have arrested my son . I was sleeping in his own bed . They all laugh . Everyone's delighted by her . Are you sure you do not want to kebab , mama lasso ? I mean , oh no , thank you , danny , you are so polite . She just likes Danny for being a good person , not because she wants to sleep with him . Boss .
Hey , number one coach is the one that sent it originally .
I just agree . Now bear with me . Ok , now we cut into Rebecca and Ted . It must be so lovely having him .
I was feeling a little exposed . But you didn't mean I was the one who said they want to sleep with Danny , Because I've said that , I just hadn't said it on the podcast . You meant no ma , no ma .
I mean , come on , what is ? We should figure this out Because there is . Pansexual refers to being interested in every gender , every iteration of that . What is it when every single person in the world thinks that they would sleep with one person ? Because that is what Danny Rojas has going on .
We should think about that . I will , I will , I will think about it . A dany sexual yes .
Everybody loves Danny Rojas yeah .
I'm a good boss .
He takes him two at a time he's got to try to chip out , chip away those numbers . Boss , Now bear with me . Must be still lovely having your mother visiting Ted . Oh yeah , it's great Oklahoma , oh no , it's weird . I love that , but coach .
That was magnificent Coach . Let me , ok , go ahead , go , go , go , go Do it .
Do it , we'll come right back to it . Didn't even tell me she was coming to show it up on nowhere , you know , just like one of them weird eyebrow hairs I started getting the day after I turned 40 . That's what mothers do , ted . So it turns out . How old was he ? We don't have the number here 12 year old . What does it say , boss ?
I believe it was 14 , but I was not sleeping in his own room .
He'd taken our car out for a joy ride . Now he was arrested for driving on the wrong side of the road , so I guess he was destined to leave an anger . Ha , ha ha ha ha ha , kill me , kill me , kill me as I was listening to this .
Now see , you died Now see , I wasn't , and it was , and the whole reason we got pulled over Ronnie Fouch was throwing gang signs at a cop car . Stupid Ronnie Fouch . One if little . I learned two pretty big lessons of the rough and tumble of playgrounds a brook ridge elementary school . One if little . Ronnie Fouch offers you a candy bar .
You immediately say no when you get the hell out of there , because there's a good chance . That little son of a gun has just pooped inside a Butterfinger wrapper . No one ever saw him do it , but a couple people ate it .
Yeah , I guess who was one of those people . We'll talk about that in a minute , but I love .
¶ Rebecca's Relationship With Her Mother
Ok , there were a few things here no one knows . Ok , I shouldn't say it that way . No one in the Ted Lasso universe we're watching knows any better than Rebecca what it's like to just have mom show up to find Sam in his boxer briefs or some other dude naked in the kitchen .
You know what I mean . Well , especially a disruptive one , yeah , disruptive .
Well , right . So when she says you know this is what it is , one , she is now playing a role , she's doing some coaching for him , so they're doing the whole total Richmond thing . But also we're getting to see how far Rebecca has come .
Like she's like , listen , man , it's acceptance , baby , rest your mother , just give a lady a good memory center , that's all , it's all good . You know , like it's very , she's totally fine .
And remember you pointing out the eating of the kebab , and I think even that is like , just like it's just her being like yeah , I'm fucking hungry and this kebab is fucking delicious . I'm not going to wait till I get back up to my office . So no one pray God with CB two . Fuck y'all .
This is delicious and I you know as much as the chairs are up on the table because of the patriarchy are not being used to seeing the Rebecca's of the world just take a good bite out of some fucking meat is the patriarchy . And to me that was her saying not even fuck the patriarchy , I don't give a fuck about the patriarchy .
I'm eating a kebab right now , like it was in response to anything other than hunger and deliciousness .
I like so much that you said I don't give a fuck about the patriarchy , because Ted's stance with his mom is this is a fight I need to win . I need to make her behave differently or get her to leave me alone and Rebecca , where she is at with her relationship with her mom , is . I don't have to fight her .
I understand where she is coming from and who she is as a person and I can give her this annoying thing that she needs , and then we can be finished and still have a relationship later . Like this is side by side comparison between a teenager's relationship with their parent and an adult's relationship with their parent .
Oh wow , Jesus , they must pay you a lot to be on this show , boss .
Yeah , tons Jesus , you wouldn't believe it , I'm going to be the one to turn red in a second . Yeah , damn , take it easy there . Good lord , fanning myself over here . You know I love me a smart woman , my boy . It's so funny , you say fanning yourself .
I was just about to say we all are . We talk about how the listener community and the buttercups , we're all sort of collectively looking for something . And Ted , last I was in the conduit for that but I found like two very weird . I don't and I haven't figured them out yet , I probably never will .
But we talk about how the human brain is wired and there's only been a couple of times in Ted Lasso where I've like fanned myself , where I was like whoo , good lord and it's the weirdest shit . One of the first one was when they were and I think it was the episode where they were where we open with the .
It's like the romantic comedy episode where they're showing all the all the establishing shots of the little shops in Richmond , right , yes , you did , you remember this , and they showed the guy cleaning the window with the squeegee and I was like , oh my God , it wasn't sexual , but I was like it was so satisfying it's more order .
You said this in the last , in the last conversation .
I did oh OK .
And you said well , no , not about that .
Well , that you love .
But you loved About spreadsheets .
Oh , the order of the spread . Yeah , you're right , actually , yeah , you're right . Order you like the order and the cleanliness and the cleaning up ?
Power washing . Yes , the same thing as when power washing .
There's a connectivity right , so that's good . But then the one I really haven't figured out and I had forgotten about it . I talked about it during the rapid reaction .
Yeah .
And then I saw it again when I did the rewatches like whatever it is about Rebecca pulling me off that skewer with her teeth and just munching away . I'm like good , heavenly Lord , what Wow Something's . I don't know what it is , I can't place it . Like Jade later pulls the kebab up nothing , I got nothing .
But something about maybe it's the , maybe it's because she is the epitome of order and then she takes the street meat and pulls it . I don't know what it is , maybe it's something , maybe it still has to do with that , but I'm just like that is . I don't know why is it notable ? Why would I even notice it ? It's so crazy .
But I didn't get past it either time .
Yeah , either time we talked about it . I've watched this once , 12 times probably , and every single time I can't get past it without actively noticing it and I'm like that is so bizarre . Anyway , I'm sure I'm the only one Buttercups assemble , and let me know if anyone else is getting a spring in their step .
Generally speaking , like if you said would you like to watch Rebecca ? Yes , like I just can . Yes , like it doesn't matter what you're going to say next Skydive , swim , run , laugh sing .
Well , it doesn't matter . Read the phone book yes .
Eat a kebab . Ok , so yeah , I think there's that to it . So I want to run this , I want to share that . These words came into my head and then I'm going to set myself up to take my flogging from boss if I'm essentially calling somebody articulate , so I'm putting that on table .
I feel like we're accustomed in many ways to watching Rebecca have every idea of how to be a quote lady , like we've talked about this over the whole series . She's got , she knows what to say , she knows what to do , she knows who to shake hands not blah , blah , blah . Somehow the word that just hit me next to oh , not lady was woman .
And I'm wondering , coach , just other conversations do , and I have had our choices of partners blah , blah , blah . It seems like there's something about her putting lady down and being woman , because a woman eats . A lady might not that's a whole other conversation but a woman eats and I feel like that's part of watching her pull that meat off of theirs .
She's like I'm not going to play prissy and have my stomach growling , I'm fucking hungry .
Boss may tee off on you for this Coach , but I'll tell you that our the no , no , ok , no , ok .
I will tell you that you are making 100% sense to like 96% of our listener community , because it is that type of strong , independent , thoughtful woman who's like fuck this shit , like who knows better , yeah , and that's like what we attract , it's what it's the people that are looking for the same things we are in the show and so , yeah , it makes perfect sense
to me that that's who listens to us and the men who love people . Like that's it , that's our listener base , yeah .
Right .
No , I am not going to tee off on you on this one . I am going to , before I make my point about Rebecca , mention that in general . Like you can't pretend mouths aren't sexy . Sorry for my sisters who are maybe listening to this , but you know who I am as a person .
This is where I'd mention that on American Gods the TV show , the introduction to Matt Sweeney one of the loves of my life is that he does coin tricks and pulls them out of the air because he's a leprechaun .
He just has them and he ends it by slowly spitting a coin into a cup while he's looking sort of off to his right and I'm like well , everybody on that side of the room is pregnant now . They just are . I don't care if you have a uterus or your age knocked up , that's great . So there's something about it that's hot .
Also , I think so much of what we've seen about Rebecca think about when she used to eat the biscuits , even Like there is something related to the fact that she is willing to embrace wanting and needing and hungering for herself that now she's like yeah , fucking , I'm hungry .
And since she took us there , what does she say when she tastes those delicious biscuits ? Fuck me .
What does she say when she tastes ?
gazellex , fucking wonderful tea , fuck me .
Fuck me . Yes , no , there is something going on . I do think that she is embracing like enjoying eating , in the same way that , because it's a physical sensation it's sensual .
That's the word . That's exactly the word . We don't have sensual pleasure .
Do we have a ? Well , I know we're all in love with , oh no , two of the three of us are in love with the bear .
¶ Generational Differences and Personal Experiences
I was trying to think if we have a nine and a half weeks for our generation or for the millennial generation . Oh , you mean like there was a food section .
I don't think they get down like that anymore .
No , they don't .
There's a lot of cocaine involved . There's a lot of cocaine involved .
I mean , let's be honest .
Yeah , there's also something about millennials in particular that went through this weird sexless virginity pledge Don't enjoy sex Like I think , maybe a backlash to earlier generations , where my generation was like , well , we're not going to be sluts Not me , I did not participate in that shit but like other people fucking thank you .
Britney Spears Jessica Simpson .
I took a lot for this . God damn it .
I was too slow in the fucking mute box .
No .
No , I take so much pride in being quick with those . I am so angry right now . I was clicking , I was clicking , god damn it .
Damn it . You're going to have to tend to your resignation .
I feel totally undressed , oh man .
So was I oh .
Sticks the landing .
Sticks the landing .
Jesus Christ , I love it , I love it . Ok , we're going to speed through this last part . Look , sometimes the truth can ruin a perfectly good story . Yeah , you should work for the Daily Mail . A nice little rip on the Daily Mail , ted . If you can give your mom one lovely moment , a memory to take back home , then you've won . That's it Again .
Very , very , that is the advice for a seasoned veteran . Yeah , all right , all right , thanks , boss . I don't know if he is able to hear it , but seems like he's at least open to you know , or somewhat receptive . Nor should Go ahead by the way .
Nor could she hear him when she was sorting out how to deal with her nemesis Rupert , and he had to tell her no , no , no , you look at the wrong thing Like this is how you already won . And she couldn't hear that . So they really have flipped positions here . Oh , my god , I'm sorry . I didn't do that on purpose and that was not my way to get back .
Yeah , I didn't mean to do that .
He can't get his mind out of the gutter , boss .
That's all we're there now .
Dirty dirty . I don't know , maybe I'm the only good boy , I don't know .
Unless there's somebody we're unaware of .
Yes , Right , there we go . So , by the way , yeah , Ted's nemesis being his mom will have to come back to that . And also , you know , in the world we live in , our current modern civilization , boy , isn't it fair that Ted only has to deal with one nemesis , that a boss . I replaced boss with nemesis . I wonder why . That's funny , no idea .
Ted only has to deal with one nemesis and meanwhile Rebecca has what ? Like she's got Rupert , she's got her mom , she's got her dad , she's got whatever societal expectations , she's got every other owner , she's got every disgusting you know Premier League man . Like it just feels really fair that you know , I think we split right down the middle .
With the old challenges yeah .
I will only say that in honor of the most recent animated Spider-Man into the multiverse .
Yeah , Across the world . No wait , I think it's into ?
I think it's into .
Into the multiverse .
I think it's into . It was really great by the way .
They should have made it more . It doesn't matter . A lot of those are not her nemesis . They suck , they're not great , but a lot of them , the other co , the owners of the other teams not a nemesis . They do not rise to the level of nemesis ?
Yeah , we're turning her to nemesis , or true nemesis here .
Yes , that's a good point . That's a good point . So she says , OK , right , I got to go and see a man about a horse . Oh , I didn't know . Girls said that when they got a pee no , Ted , I'm buying a horse .
That joke really worked for me . I can't speak for anyone else on Earth , but that joke , because I know that phrase , I know guys to say that I thought , yes , also , she's richest could be , she probably is going to go buy a horse . That makes all sense to work . That joke that really landed for me .
I thought they nailed it . I thought they nailed , loved it too . Laughed , I thought it was really good , really smart . Hey , did Teddy ever tell you about the time he ate a candy bar made of poop ? Oh my god .
I mean why ?
would you Listen ? Yeah , that's my mom would say .
I remember when he stood there with his pants down looking at his pee , pee . Oh my god , I'm like , oh my god , like , are you fucking crazy ? Like that's a thing that she would say . I'm sure she has said it , which is why it came up so easily .
I'm just telling you that , like whatever the worst possible thing , she would just like just tap the microphone and start talking about it in the town square .
It's so fine , because neither of my parents they believe me . There's plenty of faults to go around in the world , but neither of my parents had anything close to that . So , like I was you know I'm sure this is shocking to everyone , but I was always the one who was like talent show . Yeah , how many acts am I allowed to do ? So ? Um ?
I have so many talents .
You know you're like ah , you know I don't want to have to choose here , so , but but they would like total silence . You wouldn't even necessarily know they were my parents . Like it was none of that , like yeah , we're land . Like they would just sit there like they'd never seen me before in their life , like my dad especially , just chilling , and it wasn't .
It wasn't mean , it was like I'm not going to make , like there's nothing to make a production about , like all right , go ahead , do your thing . I'm watching , okay , cool . And so the idea that you know , do your , I'm sorry , do your what ? Oh , yeah , we talked about that . Do your thing . I love when you say you don't have a thing .
I always think that is so funny . You don't have a thing , that's like white culture whatever , whatever white culture , you don't have a thing . But , yeah , you don't have a thing . You shut up and you go and you do what you're told . You follow the fucking rules and don't make a nuisance of yourself . And if you do something great , shut up about it .
And if you do something bad , shut up about it .
Yep , yep , yep , do your thing .
When coach told me that I was like wait what ? Yeah , you really .
It really was like it really like he needed a moment with that concept of do your thing , that it was a universally accepted concept that you had a thing you had .
You were entitled to have a thing . You were allowed to have anything that your parents didn't tell you to have , which I'm still . We got whatever .
You go , go , go , go , go sorry .
I think , oh okay , all right , I think that's enough story time with Mama La's . All right , fellas , All right . Oh boy , practice starts in 20 minutes . Up , you go , nice to meet you , mama , nice to meet you . Hey , mama , I'll be right back . I'm gonna go change and then take you out to the pitch . Okay , honey , I'll be here .
Miss Lasso , I just wanted to introduce myself on Trent . Oh , hello , trent , hello . I was wondering if I could just have a little chat with you about it , trent , your hair is fabulous . It really , it's just styling .
Why did .
I love this . She means it .
She means it . Well , that's what I'm saying .
She really yeah , it's not artificial .
Right , yeah , I remember too , when Ted first met and quote Trent he complimented his glasses and Trent took off his glasses .
That was his response . Don't you fucking try to butter be a right .
He was like do not even try it but he's now Because he thought it was a tactic Right .
But he thought it was a Sun Tzu tactic . It's not . It was like yeah , actually , really I noticed it was a tactic .
That's it . I noticed him so I said so . So I think by here he's able to recognize like oh , this isn't this woman trying to figure out how to like have me say nice things about her son or portray me well , like it's just nope , just notice that lustrous hair viewers .
Thank you You're right , that is such a good poll coach it really is , because he speaks . Ted Lasso now . Oh yeah , no , he's fully in and there's a moment . Well , anyway , he's fluent .
There's a moment , cause I feel like there's eight moments I could say like and here's where Trent is 100% in . But there's a moment coming that I'm like that is the create . You talk about a character going from A to Z with Trent and but yeah , he now speaks . I love that he now speaks , ted Lasso .
So to him it's like oh , thanks , okay , great , I'm still gonna ask you what I'm gonna ask you . You don't expect me to not ask you , like you just made that observation . It's very nice of you .
I love it . I love it , I love it . Coach , where do people find you if they wanna find you ?
So I'm gonna say something a little different today . I had mentioned this and now we have it up on the site and I want folks to reach out to me . You can reach me , even email me at Orlando at alignpcom , but you can definitely go to the site , alignpcom . I'm gonna be running Marathon October 29th and I want you to , I want folks to contact me .
We have cause or an organization that you wanna raise money for . You raise , I run , and so we'll get the . You get the pledges off my miles and we will have logos and links and everything on the site so that people can come and check out all these different organizations and then go to the sites where they're making the contributions and pledges .
And yeah , my goal is to raise $50,000 to make the world a better place . Before all I know , I'm gonna raise $50 . Holy shit , we shall see , but I'm going for it . So here we go .
I love that .
That's the much more ethical version of you fly all by , which is what people in college used to say when they wanted somebody to take out a beer .
Well , somebody , do what your ears is nicer , Get them beer . Essentially You'll pay for it if somebody else goes again , I'll pay for it . You fly all by , you white people . Show our clever , I'm not kidding .
I'm kidding , you're not . No Right , right , no Boss . Where do people find you boss ?
Still on Twitter . Still , you can reach me and message me there . But Blue Sky , same handle . It's Dumbly underscore chambers and one of these days , I promise , I swear to God , ought it be damned , writing at the antagonist , which is antagonistblogcom .
I need you to write something on the latest season of Star Trek . By the way , we'll talk about it offline . Okay , you got to talk about Captain Hansen a little bit , mm-mm . Oh no , spock , spock , spock , spock God damn , of course , come the fuck on , Spock , you're so yeah , no , no , it's fine , I'm sorry .
No , no , no , no , no , I'm not gonna fight with you .
I'm gonna let you team up with Lauren J Burns , managing editor , because Spock is her dude too , so I'm gonna he grew a beard .
I mean , come on , oh .
This is so , so I love it . I love it , thank you . Thank you everyone for listening . Support your local library , support the written board , support the actors and writers who are on strike . Thank you for everyone who watched the Women's World Cup . It was a stunning , broke every possible record .
And as we go forward I know I've been teasing this announcement , I just want it to be right before I make it but we're gonna have our next Buttercup meetup , so consider joining the Buttercups . We have a lot of fun things planned for that , and then we can sort of delve into coaches , marathon planning and things along . It's really noble .
I would love for people to donate 50 cents for me to sprint to the mailbox Without dying .
Oh , he made it , he made it , oh , he made it , oh he made it Woo , oh , wait , wait .
No , he made it . He made it . That was close ,
¶ Upcoming Episodes and Schedule Changes
all right . Well , thank you everybody . We love having you here . We love spending this time with you . Thanks for having us on in the background while you watch dishes and do your work for people who work at home . We have I've already contacted our next guest and we're just in the process of figuring out when that particular person can be here .
So it'll be another very special episode where we meet somebody wonderful in our community . And , yeah , there's so much coming down the pipe and we're so excited . And now that my kids are almost back in school , I have two kids in college . One starts school tomorrow and one is next week .
So I'm like getting to the point where my time might be my own during the day again , so all these things can take shape . Thank you to everyone , thanks for being part of this and until next time .
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to see to the front of other world , to to be able to see to the front of other world .