Welcome to the solid Verbo.
I'll that for me.
I'm a man, I'm for I've heard so many players say, well, I want to be happy. You want to be happy for Dake Edith State. Is that whoo whoom and Dan and.
Tie welcome back to the Solid Burbo boys and girls. My name is Ty Hill, and Grant joining me is always over there in stormy New York City, the one, the only Dan Rubinstein, Sir, how are you Ty?
I'm not one for signs from above now, I'm not one for omens. I'm not one for good luck. But I was walking back from the office space at which I work back to the cloth is here where I record the show and do all the the audio recording I do, and I faintly hear something and it's getting louder as I'm walking closer and closer too in the direction I'm walking, it's getting louder and louder and louder, and then all of a sudden I can make out what it is, and it's that boom boom boom boom
ba boom boom bao super bass. And I was like, okay, if I am walking to do the show, and tis selection for what he would quote sing on a nationally televised singing competition show comes on. I'm feeling good.
Had some commentary on that on the old Twitter sphere.
Yeah, people not feeling it.
One gentleman in particular said it totally makes sense. I'm not sure if I should take that as a compliment. I'm guessing it wasn't. But what happened with the spirit with which it was intended? Whatever? Gotta be honest. This is a show about honesty. Welcome to the saliverbal I'm Tie, He's Dan. You could find us at soliverble dot com. There is also a newsletter which I would strongly suggest.
If you like the show and if you might be interested in some upcoming announcements, of which there are several, please do sign up for that newsletter.
It's free. We won't in you. We promised.
We got clothing, we got shows, we got we got stuff to talk about over the next couple months. Sign up for the newsletter if you like it, and if not, you know, if you don't want to sign up for the newsletter, that's fine. You can still subscribe to the show Wherever you get your podcasts, be it Apple, be at Google, be at Spotify. Ah, do they got podcasts over on title yet?
Maybe?
If so, you can subscribe there. Anywhere you could find a podcast, you can find our show, and of course find us on social media Facebook, Twitter, Instagram. The subreddit had an incredible AMA with our good friend Oh yeah at Goalie Junior earlier this week.
Did you see that? I did? It covered a range of topics, a lot of South Bend food talk, which I don't know how applicable it is to me, but it's applicable to somebody. And he talked about preparing for Navy, he talked about body arts, a lot of food stuff, coffee, mapps. He really touched on a good variety of things. So I was very pleased with how that turned out. And we're gonna have more of these. We know a lot of people that have interesting things to say, like MGJ.
Somebody asked if anybody had called him Mike Garlic, Yeah, which I think is great, terrific, It's delicious. Get that alice in any way you can. It's the chemical compound in there. And so very excited for the future of the AMA.
Absolutely so all sorts of ways that you can get in touch with the show of course, solidrable agmail dot com if you want to email in you've got something to get off your chest. We did a lot of that. So here's what we've been doing the last couple of weeks. As we made the turn into May, which by the way, it was the one hundred day mark not so long ago. That's right until the college football season starts. But typically the way this show works, you and I we've been
doing this for a while. When we make the turn into May, there's always that brief moment of panic, like, oh hell, what are we talking about in May? Yes, and even into the early part of June, I think we have that sentiment. But then as we get into July, all of a sudden, August gets a little bit bigger in the window. And once we get to August, it's time to actually start talking about college football in the season. So it'll be here before you know it. What we
did the last two weeks. Last week, I did the really weird role playing thing that I thought that was wonderful. I appreciate everyone in indulging me. Yeah, Journal, thank you. It seems like it went over well, so I'm okay with it. The week before that, you had twelve questions eight college football for non college football that you wanted
to pose to me. And now, because we've been putting this off, and because we've promised our lawyer for loyal overbawl ers, not lawyer over ballers, those two both both that we're going to be doing Q and a's once a month. We wanted to cast a wide net and see what kind of questions we could gather to do on h to answer on this show.
So that's where we're at tonight. I wonder how many lawyer overbawlers there actually are probably exists. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, but we do have We have a number of questions about We have a number of questions about just random things in college football and outside of college football. In the way of news, there's not much, although there's like a weird committee in the NCAA trying to figure out, if you know, we can do a likeness thing with players and making some money off of
their faces and brands. So that'll take forever and ever, but it probably gets us into our first question pretty easy. Congratulations, Skippy, you've got mail. You've got mail. On the solid verbal.
As often as we can we like to pay homage to those of you who ride into the solid verbal Let's start first and foremost. You dovetailed quite nicely, thank for our first question or first series of questions.
Really? Yes, Northwestern Chad. Yeah, I'm giving him that nick dame. I was not a self imposed nickname. But he's a Northwestern fan. His name is Chad, and he's been asking us enough questions. It's like when you ascend to a certain boy scout Eagle scout out and you get enough badges. Chad has enough ver balling badges. We're like, we give them a nickname.
Does EA Sports have a secret team of programmers working on an updated to the minute version of the NCAA football game? You know, just in case they suddenly get the all clear from the nc DOUBLEA and the courts and the players to launch a new title. Dan I, okay, yeah, I have do intel. I have a very high.
Level of confidence.
Let's say, oh my gosh, that EA is ready to move the millisecond they get the green light. I think they're prepared for it. I think they're working towards it. If you've read any of the press releases around Madden twenty, you know that they're going to be ten schools featured in Madden twenty Clemson, USC, Oregon, I think, is going to be in Florida, an Texas Tech.
Got in there somehow.
But there are there are a grouping of schools that are going to be prominently featured in the game, which I think is cool.
I would imagine those schools and players playing for those schools in the game. They will go out of their way to make it seem like there is no clear connection between current college players. We go Oregon, Justin Herbert, tall, thin quarterback for Oregon that game, short fat, possibly Korean. Yeah, I'm not sure how.
I'm not sure exactly the manner in which those teams will be represented, but they will have a presence in the game.
Do you think it'll be like remember the Mario hockey game or it was just like skinny medium.
I was just thinking that when you were talking about Justin Herbert.
Yeah, that's what they're doing. Skinny medium, medium, medium fat, skinny medium. Great.
There was a mode last year too where you could work a player through the college ranks and get him to the NFL. I think this represents some of Yea's on going efforts to rebuild the relationship with the NC double A. They're doing what they need to do to mend those fences and just trying to get a sense for what will work what won't work in the future when they decide to launch this game. There's still obviously
a very big following. We are in our thirties at this point, Dan, you still have an interest in it. You have a child. My guess is that your desire to have this game back in your life has not diminished as much as perhaps it should, despite being a new father.
What was what was your ideal setup for playing NC DOUBLEA, Like, how would you carve out your space physically? Like would you have a drink by your side? Would you be playing music? Would you be like where would you sitting? What TV were you playing? I had okay with whom were you playing? If anybody?
When I was still in my old apartment before meeting before the old crash pad marrying solid life Kate, the apartment that you could move out of forty five minutes, that's right. We had robust dynasty going a robust online dynasty. Yeah, and we had the TV mounted on the wall. We had those old couches and that was that was the ideal set up.
You were playing with your buddy Feldman.
I was playing with him a lot, Yeah, and along with other friends who weren't located in the same space, but that was that was sort of the dream man.
I played on Brown Beauty, my old couch that unfortunately Jody with and I was like, I think, what's something to retire brown Beauty. I was like, but She's like, no, I think it's time.
Uh.
Played on Brown Beauty, beautifully soft microfiber, chocolate brown couch.
I had a black leather couch, Black Beauty that the solid wife Kate immediately relegated to our basement.
I would throw on a podcast, either just out loud on my phone or on my headphones or something like that, because and I would have I would still have the EA sounds, you know, I'd still have Kirk karb Street saying like, I don't know why they went for there, very low. I had a good mix going, cold beverage going, and I would generally because I didn't sometimes i'd play with my brother who lives near me, but a lot of the time I was just playing online and it felt great.
It was the best. It was the best. All right, Ray says, Let's say EA scopes out the landscape of college football and they decide that you two the solid verbal whoa. Yeah, you guys are influential enough to have input on the relaunch. What new features would you want? What previous features would you want to return? And why is the college rock playlist from NC DOUBLEA Football two thousand and six not on that list even though it absolutely should be.
So much da la soul in my brain because of NC DOUBLEA two thousand and six, I think bad religion, lag wagon bands like that. Oh, it was wonderful, it was good, really good. What features would would I want to return? I was always just big on playing online and getting my record up. I liked playing with friends. I like playing with my brother. I did really do. I did one Dynasty and it was fun. I created players,
I liked recruiting all that kind of stuff. But it was really the essence of it was the competition, getting better, figuring out audibles that would work for me on either side of the ball, you know, the just sort of the tweaks and figuring out who I was as a player, as my playing brand, if you will. So, I don't
think there's specific features. My curious thing though, is when he says, if we're influential enough to have input on the relaunch, what I would want to do is I would want to somehow have EA leak the game to us well in advance and through our show. We're dropping nugs tie and you are listening to the show for
Easter eggs. Some of it is very direct, like, oh, this is in a game we're playing, and some of it you have to listen back, maybe play our voices in reverse to hear about new features and maybe release dates. It's an Easter egg hunt, is how we're involved with this. Remember when Twitter was new and the first really big athlete was Shack Right and he was like, Hey, everybody, I'm gonna go get some tay food at this place. Anybody want to come hang and hit some some crab
rangoon And it was just like a crazy thing. That's what I would do with this game. I'm like, all right, we're at Target, we're in Columbus, Ohio. We set it up on one of the TV's, it's gonna be here for an hour. Let's rock. We could do that.
We could make that word what that was rocks give us the word.
Yea, we would do happenings. I think that's the word happenings.
Yeah, we could do if we were influential enough to have some say over the relaunch. Hopefully they would deem us influential enough to give Locks of the Week during Dynasty Mode or Home Dogs. I don't know if Yako's could afford that sponsorship for Home Dog of the Week, but maybe like Hatfield could.
I would definitely be in favor. I would be in favored. You remember, I'm sure you do because we talked about this on our nineties video games episode Bill barn Well. The fake sponsors, Oh yeah, where it would be like Ed's House of Lobster and body shopping.
Back in the old Triple Play baseball.
There's like Triple Play ninety seven somewhere somewhere in there where they'd have fake sponsors. That would be wonderful and it dovetails nicely.
Ty.
This is a pro move here. This is a pro move with the hype, with the type of Yeah, with the hype of a potential NCAAVO game return, it's time to pay the players for their likeness. According to Dan, what random endorsements can you think of that would make sense.
So what I'm saying is if everybody's likeness is getting involved in this game, and perhaps you know this is an example, this is nothing I'd like if Trevor Lawrence, yeah, wanted to make has to be like panteen pro v right, Well, whatever it is, I would even say, EA can pay
him more to do a fake sponsor. You see what I'm saying here within the show, like maybe it's between core and like there's a little pop up square and just like Trevor Lawrence here and I'm here to tell you, and it's just more just super likenessy, it's just him in the game in the way that when you would play some basketball game from the nineties, like Charles Barkley would pop up and say something crazy, that's what I want within the game. That's how they're really taking advantage.
So it's a super personal way to do things. So he's asking, though, what what random endorsements would actually make sense for college football players outside of appearing in this video game. Oh god, I've got a bunch. Well go ahead, give them what.
I still got to go through all my modes and how I would improve the game.
But continue, so it's a weird College football is a weird mix fandom wise of older you know, richer or just fans who are nostalgic about the time they were in school fifties, sixties, seventies, right, So you want to appeal to them, but you also want to appeal to college students who are going to the game. So it's a good mix. So something like ride hailing, like at an uber Lyft sponsorship, I imagine ride hailing in college town's enormous.
Everybody's going out, you want to get home. You're not driving. So whether it's uber Lyft or whoever, I think that makes that's an actually serious answer, right sure. Oh yeah. Barbecue accessories, it's related to college football. You get your rubs, some tongs, a cutting board, whatever. You get some offensive
linemen in there. I actually think offensive and defensive linemen stand to gain the most because they can leverage their size in way like a water park sponsorship, like come out to Dean's Dean's House of Slides and we'll have a cannonball contest with the Georgia offensive line. I think you get stuff like that. Anything Japanese, anything, anything involving I don't know, kickers, punters whoever. Where they're doing, like
pickle juice soda for a Japanese brand, be wonderful. And I imagine they've got some cash they're willing to pay for their their spokespeople. Cereal makes a good deal of sense. You got a lot of young fans back in the box, snack food, hot tubs, mattresses. There's a product. They're definitely not a sponsor, but it's applicable to large men's sweating. If you heard of dude wipes, I have not do you can you guess what they are? I can take
a pretty educated guess as to it. They're odor free wipes, Okay, that you can use anywhere on your body that you see fit. I think that would make it.
I think EA can shoot a little higher than dude wipes. But it is a random endorsement.
I'm not talking about EA. I'm just talking in general in general likeness. Yes, these are just general likenesses. Yes, okay, fair enough general likeness sponsorships. But man, I really want to do happenings with whatever. NCAA twenty twenty one just all like we are just going to random, random places, probably in college towns, you know, we're probably going on tour. We're doing Madison, we're doing Colge. Do it both Missouri and South Carolina. I'm just saying I would do it.
I'm obviously we're one of the Bronx.
If they're making a new version of the game, they got to steer into recruiting because presumably when it happens, it happens quick. If they've got to spin it up quickly. I would take the old recruiting system and just put it in the new game. The old recruiting system was pretty good, even if you kept it intact in twenty twenty or twenty twenty two. The old system was was
pretty perfect moving forward. If you're going to build anything new, you find ways to enhance that recruiting mode with like new pitches and new ways maybe to negatively recruit, but steer into signing day or both signing days. Now, a transfer portal, all that stuff is very nuanced in very college football.
So oh, I could imagine a great like graphical motion graphical intro into the transfer portal.
Oh yeah, shoo shoo, shooooohoo, it'd be cool, it would be excellent. So you steer into that, you steer into the Playoff Committee. Like maybe you're inside the room with RC Slow Company God when he's making his old man case for the top four. That's that's something you can look at.
I would only be on board with that happening if if you remember the nes Games where I mean this ties into last week, Well, you'd be going through an RPG. You'd be going through a land and you'd like go into a sword and Spear emporium to buy something, and you start talking to the proprietor of the Sword and Spear emporium, and all that comes up is text on the screen and ruver and that comes up underneath whoever
it is, Rob Mullins. You know that kind of stuff where it's just like wow, Ohio standards, but everything that you actually hear is and just the text appears underneath that. I'd be on board with. I don't want actual speech at that point.
Making a D mode where you can upgrade facility God iron Fire, that'd be cool.
I would do. I would I would play on strength coach mode. I would choose probably the Northwestern Dude, maybe Oregon's Aaronfeld, where he's just like you have to hit certain benchmarks between seasons and Dynasty mode in the locker room. It's like it's the NCAA version of in Street Fighter when you're beating the crap out of the car, right, just mashing buttons. Yeah, you're just mashing buttons. So you're just doing squats and lunches and you're doing like the
box jumps. That's that's a mandatory thing between seasons.
Essentially the same thing as my favorite Nintendo game of all time, Capcom's Gold Medal Challenge.
Yes, just slamming buttons?
Okay, Yeah, Can Neil Brown take West Virginia Good above the eight win level consistently?
That's from Frank. Yes.
Now, Neil Brown is your boy, so I don't don't want to steal your thunder here, but I will say I think the answer is absolutely yes. What I find interesting about Neil Brown and correct me if I'm wrong, since you are the Neil Brown aficionado of the program, He's got all sorts of offensive experience before becoming a head football coach, but he's not running any kind of pass happy system. This isn't going to be the Holgerson offense.
He's really good at.
Winning in the trenches, and he's really good at finding an offensive system that fits personnel. And most interesting of all is that despite being an offensive minded guy, his defenses have been baller.
Yeah, they've been very very good.
And he's bringing his DC over from Troy with him to West Virginia.
So Troy these last few years sixteen, seventeen, eighteen after they go four and eight, ten, eleven and ten wins, but that includes bulls, so nine, ten and nine by my math, so yes, that's above eight. And if you look back to where West Virginia was during their best year in the Big Twelve, which I believe is twenty sixteen, they ran the ball very very well, they defended the run very very well. And West Virginia's recently scheduled pretty well in the non conference portion of their schedule. So
coming up, they do have some significant opponents. They I mean, the backyard brawl is back starting. I want to say twenty twenty two. They're playing three or four times. They have Alabama in six or seven years, but they have Virginia Tech. They have Florida State on a neutral site. I think it's in Atlanta. They have Missouri, so they have I think a home and home with Penn State.
So if you throw in a loss probably most years in the non conference, or not most years, but every so often, and then a couple losses in Big twelve time. I think it's doable. It's all about going to be about the defense. I don't think it's going to be a great year one because of what they have to replace. Quarterback is a big question mark. Offensive line does not look great right now, receiver does not look great. Defense may be okay at spots. It's all going to be
for him. It's going to be defense in the in the Big twelve. And if they're going to get to that point, they're going to need to recruit Florida very well. He's going to need to develop diamonds in the rough. I'm confident that he'll be able to do that. Nine every year, nine plus every year is a lot. I'd say eight plus. I think they'd be in a good place there. He says consistently eight nine plus. I thought he said more than eight. Okay, eight win level. Consistently
he said above an eight win level. My math tells me nine is above eight. I think he can get to eight consistently. I'm curious about this offense, curious about whoever ends up starting Jack Allison or Austin Kendall. Yeah. I like Neil Brown. I like that higher.
I think is a really really good higher, and I think defense can be a competitive advantage in the.
Don't I'm not in love with King. I believe it's konig. Is that how you pronounce it? I looked up the pronunciation guide? Okay, wow, look at you. I'm not in love with vic. He has been like a poor man's Jim Cheney defensive consultant type to me, and I generally don't trust them as for like consistent high level play. But he was great for Troy and that defense. They've been absolutely terrific against the run. I hope it keeps up.
But there, I think they're gonna be doing some adjusting scheme wise.
Yeah, can it scale up, especially in the Big twelve a little bit more wide open?
Okay? So I would say there to get to nine wins a year on average regular season wins, not nine including a bowl, I would give it a forty eight percent chance of happening.
All right, I'll go a little higher than that, but I see where you're coming from. Abbit what Big ten team will have the biggest upset? Alert during the season. This is an excellent question. I don't know about upset alert, but I'm going to harken back something I said a couple of weeks ago. The biggest letdown look ahead sandwich is Michigan going to Indiana November twenty third. It's one week after hosting Michigan State and one week before hosting
Ohio State. That, my friends, is the letdown look ahead sandwich of the big season.
That's the obvious one. Yes, I've got an open faced let down look ahead sandwich. Remember the definition of an open facer I do, of course, bye week after the situation. So I have Michigan at Maryland, which I'm not super keen on Maryland this year. A lot of questions all over the place. I don't know if I love them. On defense with I think it's Brady Hoake's older brother, That's who was there, John Hoak. John Hoak, oh I looked it up. He was with Tampa Bay last year.
He was long time I think Chicago Bears defensive backs coach. Defensive backs coach for Tampa Bay last year. Not a good past. Defense turns out thirty two out of thirty two. Not a good place to be not all on them, but.
Two syllable names are very unfulfilling.
I have So Michigan is playing Notre Dame. I believe in the Big House this year. Right then they have Maryland on the road, then they have a bye and then they have Michigan State. Okay, So I think there's an open face quality to that. I think there's only three teams that could qualify as right now being on upset alert. I don't think there is a true Wisconsin upset alert. I don't think there's a true Michigan State upset alert. After last year. I think it's just Michigan,
Ohio State, and Penn State right now. Is that reasonable? Those three teams are the true If we're talking upsets in May, I think it's after last year. It's not a big upset of Michigan State loses to a lesser team ORF Wisconsin right now loses to a lesser team Ohio State at Northwestern on that weird Friday. Yeah, it's before Wisconsin and after a bye week, so scheduleized that could be a little bit strange for them going to
Kyle Field and then Penn State at Minnesota. Penn State will not have played at home in three weeks with a buy in there, and that would be after three good defenses. I think it's the Michigan schools and Iowa, so presumably just being away from home and strange beds good defenses. I'd watch out for that one, especially with how Minnesota finished last year.
We'll see Chris with some random rapid fire what's more likely questions? I like it? Yes, first one, a team other than Georgia wins the SEC East or a team other than Alabama wins the SEC West. I think I would rather have a team other than Georgia winning the SEC.
I think Florida's closer to Georgia than the team is in the West to Alabama right now. And I wish it were LSU. But if you could remind me, it's been years since they've scored a point against Alabama. Years.
Kansas wins three games or Kansas wins any other number of games, right.
I'm gonna take other, I'm gonna go other, I'm gonna go under. I'm gonna go under.
With that a non Power five team, and he says in parentheses, Notre Dame is eligible finish is in the top eight in a final pre Bowl ranking, or one of Alabama or Clemson misses the playoff.
I boy, I don't.
Think Alabama or Clemson are missing the playoffs, So by default, I'm going a non Power five team finishing in the top eight.
Oh, I'm gonna take either Alabama or Clemson missing the playoff. Alabama most likely has to go through Georgia. Clemson loses Trevor Lawrence. I hope it doesn't happen, but that's that's sort of a razor with thin margin at that point. We saw what happened last year, so I think there are too many variables, and Alabama still has a tough schedule in the SEC WES. Clemson most certainly does not and will not have to go through anybody all that
good in their conference championship game. But yeah, Alabama going through Georgia once again with Jake From might be the first quarterback taken in the draft next year, right, it might be. I don't want to have a discussion about this.
Well, I'm just saying Jake From in his if Daniel year, if Daniel freaking Jones can go top two, Okay, so forget the NFL draft.
It's the NFL Draft. And by the way, I think LSU in my head, LSU did score a touchdown. They've scored a touchdown in the last three years against Alabama, so I regret the error. I think Jake from having that experience playing on a big stage looking as good as Georgia did for a good chunk of last year's game and for the National championship game the year before.
I'm going to go with that, all right, okay, us next rapid fire non quarterback wins the Heisman, or a player from a note on playoff team wins the Heisman, I'll take non playoff. I'll take a non playoff team because I can still get a quarterback. That way, I could still get you know, Dwayne Haskins was a finalist last year as a non playoff player.
A coach not named Sabin or Sweeney wins a playoff game, or a player not named Tua or Lawrence wins the Heisman, that's a really good one.
Yeah, I'll take the first one because they could be playing each other in the first round. I was thinking that as well.
I don't think it's likely, and I think it's far less likely that Tua or Lawrence won't win the Heisman. So I'm going to go I agree with you, but even like Soart, Yeah, finishing one and two means they both are either undefeated or have a terrific loss.
To stay at one or two. And I think they could randomly lose a game and still make the playoff like Alabama did without winning their division a couple of years ago. Sure, absolutely, and just sneaking as like a three or four and end up playing each other. I'm going to allow you.
To rant on part F here in Chris's rapid fire what's more likely questions the PAC twelve champion has fewer than two losses, or the PAC twelve champion comes from the South Division. I think we are in agreement on this one, but I would like you to just go ahead and rant.
I don't even know the PAC twelve champion having fewer than two losses, So you're talking about an eleven and one I guess twelve and one champion, that's what he's saying. I don't see it. I don't see it.
So by default, then it's got to be from the South Division, could be could be USC maybe.
Thanks take Utah Utah the South.
Yeah, okay, there will be a five overtime plus game this year, or there will not be a five overtime plus game this year.
I say no. I say no.
And finally, Illinois will make a bowl game or Colorado will make a bowl game. So he's saying ill versus Colorado. I would most definitely go with Colorado on that one.
I think so too. I'm pulling up their schedule right now. They have an experienced quarterback, they have maybe the best wide receiver in the country, so a game changer. Not a lot of schools can claim that. Colorado State Nebraska both at home, air Force at home, so they're not leaving Boulder until they travel to Asu. Who's going through some changes, new quarterback there, possibly a freshman. So if we're counting winnable games, Colorado State and Nebraska, air Force,
Arizona State Arizona, that's five. UCLA is six. I don't think either one of them is making a bowl game.
This might be my favorite question we've ever gotten.
I'm ready.
Jason says, if you had to pick a college stadium to occupy to defend yourself against roving hordes, he has zombies, fans, et cetera. Which stadium do you pick to give you the best chance of survival. You got to consider all sorts of things.
Here.
He has sight lines, points of entry, food offerings and the like.
Dan, do you have an answer for this?
I thought long and hard and probably put too much energy into it, but I feel like I have a good answer.
I'm taking dope Campbell, Okay, while I'm going to Tallahassee. You have a mascot with a flaming spear. That helps. It does help that. I don't know if there is a better you're talking if you talk about like the West Virginia musket. If you're shooting blanks, you're talking cannons at various schools. You're shooting blanks. That's a flaming spear. Is a flaming spear? Is a flaming spear? That's right.
So I'm presumably getting access to that, getting a weapon. Yeah, I'm getting a nice weapon there, or an armory of flaming spirits.
And a horse and a horse which, provided you can ride the horse, gives you a way to get around.
And also the surrounding area in Leon County and the Panhandle. If we're talking about an apocalypse, we're also talking about weapons everywhere, illegal pets on the loose, like it's an area where I feel like there is going to be some backup if they're willing to be on my side. Okay, so I'm going to Campbell. I am harnessing the energy of FSU Twitter.
What I like about it is that it's in the shape of a bowl mm hmm. And it's a major college football stadium where in crowd control is something they've clearly figured out.
But it's old enough that there's not it's not intricate, no, like there's not that hat walks. That's the place to hide.
I don't want Beaver Stadium because then I got to worry about the zombies getting onto the upper deck and what the hell you're going to do. Then conversely, I don't want something like a Sam Boyd Stadium comes to mind for UNLV, where you've basically got one whole side of the stadium. I don't know how well you know Sam Boyd. I don't know why I thought I was
the back of my hand. Yeah, but there's a whole area behind a scoreboard where there's just it's like a hill and they could just stream in and then your toast you've got nowhere to go. I don't want that either. I don't want zombies coming in unabated. I like the cut of your jib with Dope Campbell. I think the answer is Michigan Stadium.
Here's why. So you have your bowl, you've got the bull.
It's obviously a huge stadium, but it's built a little bit like Fenway Park in that it's built down into the ground, right, so you've got really good sight lines from the top of the stadium. You can always fight from an elevated position, which I like, which is helpful. You've got consistent terrain to fight on because it's in the shape of a bull. It bows out a lot, and you've got consistent points of entry. So I like that about Michigan Stadium. Plus, they're used to having a
large capacity crowd there. There used to crowd control, presumably, tons of places to eat. If you've got to go and raid a concession stand, you know you can. You can make do with Michigan Stadium. I think that's the correct answer.
Counterpoint, if this is your new home stadium, there's just too much history there of the home team losing when the stakes are oh damn, and when when everything's on the line with zombies and here's the other thing about Michigan Stadium. There's a certain quiet to it that can be come on, I'm sorry, I apologize. I'm married into a mazing blue family.
The answer is Michigan Stadium.
That's pretty good. I'm sticking with dok.
Okay, let's go to Josh, what's your preferred college football preview mag and why.
Oh, I've really grown to like Fawn a lot. Okay. They've incorporated people that we've had on this show a lot. They're incorporated some analytics angles. It's sort of no nonsense. But it's all in English. It's not like there aren't seventy three different abbreviations that I suddenly have to like turn to a legend to remember what I'm looking at. There's nothing that's referencing, like looking at a Notre Dame preview that's talking about Tommy Reese. Excuse me, Tom.
Reese, Tom it's tom. There's just too.
Much context in some other some other magazines. And I just there's a depth chart, there's a schedule, they're position group breakdowns. It's a great pooper guide. I love it.
They're all they're all very good, the delights, they're all very if I'm picking though I probably go athlon as well. Yeah, I buy them all for what it's worth.
But how do you feel? How do you feel about the anonymous scouting reports.
I'm a huge sucker for the not like the the blind item.
They are ethically hazy, ethically in a very strange place.
You're talking like page six kind of well it's out, okay.
So if you don't know what we're talking about in athlon for each team, say they're talking about I don't know Texas A and M, they'll be like a rival assistance take It will be like the offensive line was super overrated last year. I don't think they've got the bodies up front on defense, and while I like their defensive coordinator, I don't think their quarterback has that highest ceiling.
They're much more beatable than people realize. Now you're hiding behind anonymity to say mean things, which again ethically not wonderful. As you know, somebody interested in media and journalism, but somebody interested in like the sweet sweet juice that that nectary gossip.
I love it all right, Yeah, Kevin in Washington, do you think it's possible ed Orgeron could be on the path to building LSU in the same way that Davos this is the good stuff built Clemson over the last few years. He goes the reasoning for my question. LSU was trended better over the last couple of years overall, including a Big Bowl win last year with a horrifically tough schedule, and there seems to be a lot of similarity between Dabo and Orgeron in terms of the strengths
and weaknesses they bring to the head coach position. Dan, this is an excellent question, Thank you, Kevin.
We've started seeing this a lot in a lot of different places with new coaches and strategies that like they're going to do for their new program what Dabo did for Clemson, and that is they're just gonna worry about big picture stuff and recruiting and infrastructure and operations, and they're going to be hands off with offense and defense.
They're going to not take as much money and spend all their money on the assistance and coordinators and do everything they can't make the environment great sech assistance and coordinators will want to stay. All of that under sells an incredibly important point. What if you just can't dabboise your program what if, and stay with me here, what if Dabo Sweeney is uniquely excellence? What if he's just an incredible football coach and not a template? Is that?
Does that make sense? What if he's really good? And I think the fact that like he portrays this at times sort of aw shucks kind of thing, like he's not actually that good, He's just tapped into a strategy. And I think that's so misleading.
It does go against the Beyonce principle of finding another Dabbo in a minute.
It does. And I mean I remember hearing about this when Willie Taggert was hired at Orgon, that he's going to do for Orgon what you know, he's a great recruiter and he's very likable blah blah blah. And you know he hired Jim Levitch and he's paying all this money on coordinators ya Mark Crystabal, these big splash hires. Doing what Dabo did at Clemson has to be nearly impossible, because if it weren't, everyone everybody would be doing it.
They have this thing with baseball players, and I forget who came up with the stat, but once they get to fifteen hundred at bats, you sort of know what they are, and I think both Dabo and Coach O at this point have reached their proverbial fifteen hundred at bats. We know what they are. I feel a lot more confident in saying that Coach O isn't going to get to Dabbo heights than otherwise, So I'd love to be wrong about that. I love LSU football. I'm rooting for
Coach O. I think it's a great story. I don't think I agree with the premise here that he's going to build it Dabo style and turn LSU into the next Alabama of the West.
Right, it's not a prefab situation now, you are not. It's unlikely that anybody will ever be able to do what Dabo did for Clemson. And LSU is a national champmanship winning program recently, recruits have been alive. I believe you know they won in what two thousand and seven? Yep, So you're talking about recruits having vague recollections of LSU as a top tier team and they were in the national championship what twenty twelve, twenty eleven. So LSU is
in a good place brand wise. The big difference right now between Clemson and LSU is. LSU's quarterback is fine. Clemson's quarterback is amazing.
Trevor is Trevor want by the way, Trevor Lawrence, by the way. I don't mean to paint coach O in any kind of negative light too late.
He could at Origron's a really good coach. I really like LSU.
He could never even sniff Dabo Sweeney and still be very good at LSU and build LSU into something more than they've been the previous fifteen years. It's not to say that coach O is doing a bad job or is going to do a bad job. It's just Dabo is clearly at a place now in college football that puts him in rarefied air.
There's something else. There's something else that should also is relevance to the discussion of whether or not at Origeron can do for LSU what Dablosweeney has done for Clemson. And this is what Dablosweeney also has going for him that LSU never ever, will you ready Georgia Tech at Syracuse now at North Carolina, Florida State, at Louisville, Boston College, at NC State, Wake Forest, Yeah, it's pretty good, not bad. It is not pretty good?
All right, let's move on. This one comes from Matt. I don't know if we address this. I think I intended on addressing it.
Mm hmm.
We might not have had time on one of our previous Q and A shows, but I thank Matt for posting this again. I think on Facebook, at what point is a team's past accomplishments irrelevant or not worth mentioning? For example, Illinois has five national championships?
Wow? Five, Yeah, the.
Last of which in nineteen fifty one. Does that even matter? Michigan has eleven, with the last in nineteen ninety seven, but nothing since the early nineteen hundreds. Do those other ten count? A coworker and I have the debate. It's written in a very McSweeney's esque way.
I love it.
I said thirty years is relevant. He says they are always relevant. What are your thoughts?
Ty? If you go to my childhood bedroom, you're going to see a lot of soccer trophies. Don't think I'm getting the call up to the men's national team. I mean we're talking littered with soccer trophe not going to be starting it right back? Eh? Not me?
Not me?
And Christian Pulisic whatever, it's not not likely. Here's what I would say. Our friend Bud Elliott did a really nice job, and I just referenced it. He pointed out the ages of recruits when school's last won national chamceampionships. I don't have it in front of me. I need
to get my laptop is where it was. But if you if a recruit is not alive the last time you won a national championship, it's not that it doesn't count, but I don't think you can really talk about your program as national championship caliber right appearing or winning the other thing. I would say if your team won a national championship when technologically the broadcast was extremely different. So
here's what I'll say. If your team won an last one a national championship when it was four x three HD was not available, you're not really a national championship contending program right now. You're not. You shouldn't be thought of in that way. If we're talking about a graphics package on ABC or CBS or whoever was broadcasting the game that you're just like, oh my god, I totally
forgot about that weird loop D loopy rainbow scoreboard. You're probably this is very much like you might be a redneck if but you're on a national championship contending program or not a national championship owning program. In any sort of relevant way, it has.
To be within your peripheral view right in order for it to actually carry any weight. It doesn't mean that because it happened in nineteen fifty one, it doesn't count for Illinois.
Of course, it counts for Ille or if the best player on that team has been working in a non football job long enough to have tenure or to have had a party celebrating how long he's been working at this nont it's gone pro in something other than football, like I think it's timed, like for Illinois specifically, they went to the rose Ball with Juice Williams. Jews Williams has probably been working somewhere for a long time, not in football. Can't really talk about Illinois as like, y, yeah,
we're Rose Bowl. Yeah, it's a you know Jews Williams huh sear Bendenhall. Yeah.
Of course the nineteen sixty one Yankees matter because the Yankees have won multiple times since eighteen sixty one, Right, nineteen fifty one has been a long time. It does not carry weight with it, but it certainly carries the banner and all the pomp and circumstance that came along with winning a championship. However many years ago, I can't even count that high. Yeah yeah, Red Grange, you got Rayniski.
I'm looking at a list right now. You can drop all stick Bud guess you can drop all sorts of names here. Do we want to go one more college football and then close to one more college football?
Maybe we got.
Fifteen to twenty minutes of none?
I'm ready.
You can change one rule. This is from Ryan Oh.
It's a good question. One rule for.
The twenty nineteen season. What would it be?
I've got two because that's how I roll. I'm going to ban punting. Okay, who gets excited about You get more football plays? You get twenty five percent more plays in a game like football plays. Not that punting is not a football players, but you know what I'm talking about. Somebody under center as so. End zone PI is a touchdown in the same way that end zone holding in your own end zone or some sort of penalty committed in your own end zone is a safety. End zone
PI touchdown. Boom. Okay, and obviously you're gonna have terrible calls and it's gonna swing things. But I like that idea because I don't want intentional jersey grabbing. I don't. I don't feel like that's that does much for me from a football perspective.
I am getting rid of targeting.
Okay.
I care about player safety, but maybe.
Not as much as I should so, so if you're gonna ban targeting, then I think you should probably also ban kickoff returns.
No, I'm gonna just kick offs in general. I didn't think that deep that balances it out. It does balance it out, but I'm banning targeting in part because I don't think the rule has been applied correctly and I think it gets in the way, especially since we have replay and there's still bad targeting calls. But that's a separate discussion for another podcast. Getting rid of targeting first and foremost. And I'm also allowing holding. Actually I'm allowing
it on offense. I'm allowing it on defense. I just want to see how much these guys want it. If you're a defensive lineman and you're being held, you got to earn your keep to make it through that three hundred and twenty pound offensive lineman to get to the quarterback.
I am saying, the guy who shouldn't have been in the PAC twelve review booth for I think it was Washington State USC. He is the only one reviewing calls for all.
Only glasses ref. Can we have glasses ref? Oh no, let's not do that. But yeah, some lawyer for the PAC twelve. All right, you want to talk non football? If you've exhausted yourself, let's ridiculous football time.
Let's let's pick out some non college football. So again, if you're.
Listening at home, if you tuned in for the football, you're more than welcome to stay for the fun. But if you made it this far, we do appreciate it. We'll be back next week's same time, same place. We got ten or fifteen minutes. Here, let's say of non college football. Dan, I'll let you pick from the hat.
Go ahead. What is the most unlikely product? Again, this is Northwestern Chad's keen Signiara, this is coming out party. What is the most unlikely product that you'd go out of your way to write a five star review for on Amazon? And he says his is a mole killing trap.
A mole killing trap.
Okay, yeah, he's got he's got moles apparently destroying his yard. What is a five star review that you will go out of your way to leave for something you ordered. It doesn't have to be an Amazon but something online.
I ordered a very cheap plastic trophy for a golf outing more of a gag gift. Yeah, that I would give a five star review. There's really nothing to review other than the fact that it didn't break when it got to That's true, So that's one I think the more practical answer, though, gag gift. The side is one of two things. Okay, I ordered the smoke detectors, remember the ones that I said I went above and beyond to make sure that they were of the safest and.
The Catillac Go smoke detectors.
Yeah, I would probably write a review. I don't know what the review would say, but I feel like they're really good quality, and I would write a review for a smoke detector. I would also write a review. I bought many more than I should have, like a dozen and a half of those like solar powered pathlights that you put out in front of the house.
Have you seen these things? You know what I mean, yeah, are they like the airport lights kind of things? Sort of?
They're made of they're made of what I would describe as the cheapest quality plastic known to man. But because they've got the solar panel, the wee solar panel at the top, the size of like a square of duct tape on the very top, and because they light up at the same time every night reliably, I feel like they deserve a five star review.
Great.
So, yeah, that's very unlikely the review would not be helpful, But off the top of my head, that's the direction I'm going.
My wife loses her keys pretty consistently. She's a very bright person. She's just sometimes scatterbrained. And I ordered her one of those alarms that you put on your keychain that you can set off a beeping, a loud beeping from your phone. Does it actually work? It works so well, really, and it makes my day. She's probably lost her keys since we got one of these things. That was like
fifteen twenty bucks, probably three four times. One, it's incredibly helpful and it works and it helps her to find her keys. But two, it's great because she forgets how to use the app, and so she has to come to me and be like, so I need to find my keys, and I know there's an app and I know you know how to use it, so and it's wonderful every time it works perfectly. And I get that situation every time. Where are we going next? We're gonna go too. Let's go to Ben.
Now.
Ben had a pretty good question. I guess people are asking about beach verus lakes or lakes versus salt question before, haven't we? I think we've done that question. I prefer the saltwater. I like waves, but I appreciate a good lake because it's easier to get a house on a lake and grill and go on pontoon boats. It's a good time. It doesn't have to be one better than the other. We can all be secure in our preferences. Bugs at the lake, don't you? There are bugs at
the lake? Yeah? I go. There are bugs and sometimes humidity because of said bugs. Yeah. What was your favorite jersey to wear growing up? Tis to know? Oh, buddy, what was yours?
Well, okay, I'm not going to say favorite, but I had a hodgepodge of really random jerseys. In the NBA, I was the proud owner of a Mahmud abdul Rahuf Nuggets jersey.
Right, shout out to Chris Jackson slash Mahmud abd rahoof.
In the NHL. I had, Yeah, that's right, I had one. I had one of those Phoenix Coyote jerseys. Oh my gosh, who was it? I don't remember. I believe it was the goal whoever the goalie was at the time. Either that or it didn't have a name on the back, but I had one of those. I also had a Boston Bruins jersey. It was a big Ray Bork fan back in the day.
Have to be yeah.
On the baseball side, I don't know if I had a jersey John Wetlands. No John Wetland jersey, thankfully David Kohane now didn't have any Yankees jerseys, okay, and I don't think I had any Giants jerseys. Chris Sabo I may have had. I know I had a number three Notre Dame jersey. But the good part about Notre Dame jerseys is because there's no name on the back, it's transferable from season to season.
It was a Rick Meyer jersey.
It may still be in my closet back at Mammy H's house. There was also a Penny Hardaway era for me.
Mm hmm.
I feel like every kid but I had. I had the light blue Orlando Magic version.
That's a good one. Yeah one I had. I don't even know how many jerseys I had because I didn't really wasn't really a jersey person. But I loved my original Toronto Raptors Damon Stoudemier. Oh yeah, okay, purple not white, went with the purple. I loved him at Arizona. My mom went to Arizona. So I rocked that for a good chunk of time. I like it. Ty, What is your go to meal? For those? Quote? Bring something to share? Social gatherings, pot, lux, tailgates, et cetera. Ryan wants to know, Oh,
go to meal? Mm hmm. I got two really good options for you. Bring something to share?
Well?
Yeah, yeah, what do you What do you bring in to share? Bringing a casse role, bringing a dip? Are we assuming that I'm cooking it or are we doing something to it or arranging it? Yeah?
Or is it something that I could buy it like you could if you.
Could have sound like fruit salad would count. Okay, So I'm gonna throw together a fruit salad, something that you are not just bringing from the grocery store to the gap.
Why don't you go first. I need to think this one over a little bit.
All right. I make a terrific charred corn salad. You throw the corn current, throw the corn cobs on the grill, and there's like a honey, seracha garlic dressing. It's charred corn, black beans, avocado, serrano chilis clanch. It's great, It's really really good. That's a recipe from a barbecue place in Atlanta called bees Crackling. And then just some homemade cookies. People are always very impressed when I've shown up, be like, yeah,
I made some cookies like you made these? Like yeah, I just mixed together a couple ingredients and threw together some golf balls on a pan and in the oven, and then brought them over like wow, that is incredible. So people have low expectations of most of us, So thrown together some cookies. I think it's a great call.
I make a really good roasted vegetable concoction. And what I like about it is, first off, it's simple to make. You cut up vegetable. It's very vague, I know, but that's that's sort of the hidden secret. It's not so much the vegetables, because you look at them and think, oh, well, what's so special about that?
What's the vehicle you're bringing it in? But there is.
It Usually just a pan, standardish your pan, you cook it on a cookie sheet. But there is a honey dijon sauce that I've learned to make that is very secretly delicious.
That's great.
So there's more to it than meets the eye, which is one of the reasons why I like bringing it.
This goes into Matt's question of could you please give a ranking of things that should be grilled? That's a who it says, maybe a top five. Okay, that's more limiting, and one underrated thing that I should try on the grill. So okay, I've got good. I've got some answers here. Do you ever grill a banana? No? I haven't. I don't really love bananas. I's good.
It's it's tough to grill, but it's actually pretty.
Good if you do it correctly. My underrated answer is peaches. I will slice up some peaches, I will bathe them in honey water for a little bit. I will charm on the grill and then crank some sea salt on top of those suckers when they when they're ready and charred. Okat sweet and sour sweet and salt, not sour sweet and salty salty, because the honey gives you a nice caramelization on it. So it's wonderful, especially if you're into ice cream. It's sort of like a it's a peach
cobbler without any cobble. It's great. I would, you know, marinate some carne asada, anything that cooks quickly on a grill, So any thin steak that's marinated, like bulgogi, You want some Korean barbecue, Oh, it's wonderful. It is very rare that I will have a lot of people over and do some sort of big grill cookout style thing without just making a mount of onions and peppers on the grill.
I'll change the question around a little bit and say that I think chicken is overrated on the grill, and I think.
Chicken marinated chicken this can be really good on the grill.
Chicken thighs, yes, yeah, because there's that natural built in moisture to it. Yeah, But like chicken breast It's very easy to screw that. Oh yeah, yeah, very easy to screw that up. Now, if you lather enough barbecue sauce on it, you can make anything taste good.
I'm living in a PBW. It's I'm living in a post breast world. Yeah, okay. I would also say, if you can get a pizza steel, you throw the pan, the pizza pan essentially on the grill for like forty five minutes until it's like six hundred degrees. Then you put the pizza on that and absorbs the heat really well, and you get a great pie on them. You've been and called a kettle pizza. Yeah, you've been pumpingy.
You've been any for like months now because you know that we're putting the patio on the back here to try and buy. How much does this thing costs? This contraption? Like eight hundred Well a.
Really good one, yes, a really good tabletop pizza oven. We'll set you back seven eight hundred bucks. But I think you can do pretty well for two or three hundred bucks. That might be a little too rich for my blood. You like pizza, but maybe not that much. You know how there are dance moms that are living vicariously through their four or five six year old, and they're you know, stage moms. They're like pushing them too hard to fulfill their own dreams. I feel like I'm
a patio dad. Yeah, I feel like living in an apartment as you build a patio. I'm trying to live vicariously through you. All right? I love this question? Are you ready? Due to circumstances beyond my control? This comes to us from an anonymous verballer WHOA, my wedding is going to have to be somewhat limited time wise with an open dance floor about two hours. How do I make sure the dance floor stays full for the entirety of the two hours? Please don't use my name on air.
That comes to us from Oh wow, they're really famous. Okay, sorry, Ty, what's your answer?
Okay, my wedding is going to have a somewhat limited time with an open dance floor.
Yeah about.
I don't know what closed dance floors are, but I'm ready to figure it out. How do I make sure the dance floor stays full for the full keep the party going?
M hmm.
So what Anonymous has not specified here is the other circumstances surrounding the wedding. Is there an open bar that helps?
Believe me? That helps well. That does take people away from the dance floor, though if there takes people going to dance floor, yeah, but not if you have a good pre reception ceremony with an open bar, if you get people liquored up enough by the time they get to the dance floor, they're a little bit more likely to get out there. You ever go to a wedding with a bar on the dance floor, because I have
had that work out. In each corner of the dance floor there was a little tequila cart where you could either get shots of tequila or little margarita shots, and people loved it.
That'll help, right, That will help help. Yeah, So that's the first thing. Open bar, preferably before you get to the dance floor I think helps. Secondly, it might be obvious, but good music, good music, a live band, that'll help.
Mm hmm.
But good music first and foremost I think is is going to get people out there, and then if you can nudge them a little bit more out onto the dance floor with a good liquor situation, that's probably your best bet.
I would also say Cocktail Weenies, Cocktail Weenie Fountain in the middle of the dance floor. Music wise, lean heavy on like a middle ground era of songs. So you're not going uptown funk and you're not necessarily going my girl. You gotta find the happy medium where the older part of the crowd is familiar and the younger part of the crowd is familiar. So is in sync to modern I think that's too modern, too modern, Okay, I would say, okay,
everybody wants to dance to shout. That's facts only, right, Sure, I want to dance with somebody. You make my dreams sign sealed delivery. It's a little older, I don't know, you know, ain't no mountain high enough. Everybody still loves it. But like foot Loose Jackson five, I want you back. Yeah, that I think if you lean into oh yes, of course I've heard this song, and then like everybody younger
like hell yeah, I want you back. So I think that's the move where you're not alienating somebody with your music. What about electric Slide, it's a good time. I would do it a little bit later on, when the tequila card is really pumped in.
Yeah, Macarina, some popular ones like that will do the trick.
You're losing people. You're losing people. It's real stationary, which will appeal to the older crowd, but I think you're losing the younger crowd. There.
It's a good question, Anonymous. I hope your wedding goes well.
I hope it does too. This is from just some guy. Yeah it's too Dan, that's me and Ti, but mostly maybe then I went through it.
Let me read it then, Okay, if it's to you, My wife and I just found out we are expecting our first child in late December. Congratulations, just some guy. Two questions here? Question one here, Dan, what is the number one thing you did to make Jody with an Eyes life better during her pregnancy?
So I can speak very specifically to this because one, I'm a dad. The solid baby looks a little bit like me, so Ven firmed. Two he was born in late January, so winter baby, I would say. Jody with and I did not really have morning sickness. And part of that is just luck, but part of it is also right when she woke up, she started pumping carbs. Yeah, just I woke up and I made her toast, got some granola bars. You know, whatever whatever was she was
craving that. You hit that real early. It sets the tone. Drink a lot of water, make sure there's always water around. I don't know if you live in a big city or not. And so we're used taking public transportation places, but like after dinner, she'd be a little uncomfortable. So more cabs and ubers. I don't love doing that, but I said, sure, let's take more cabs and ubers, more ac than usual. It already feels freezing, but sure, uh huh, let's do it. So that's how I made her more comfortable.
I would say his number two.
Point, number two point help me choose a baby moon destination. He says, we live in Chicago, so really anywhere in the continental United States is fair game. I'm just going to say, if you're doing baby moon, and presumably your wife is mid pregnancy.
It'll be in the warmer time a year. Yeah, warmer time of year.
I don't think you want to lump on top of that a longer plane ride. Planes are uncomfortable enough, as is maybe something maybe a nice road trip somewhere you can drive to.
I would say that is spot on. Luckily they're in Chicago, so they're pretty central. Don't go anywhere humid if it's over the summer, so that probably eliminates most of the South, unless there's a part of the South that doesn't get humid over the summer that I don't know about. But because you are central, we consider two places that were opposite coasts. One would have been a very long flight, and I'm still kind of bummed we didn't go. But
that was Pacific Northwest, not super humid up there. Seattle, Portland, Vancouver. Great food on the water, it's you can hike, you can just chill, you can go to if you're into going to independent record stores. Come on. Nothing no better area than that. But we ended up going to Maine, which also ruled it was great. We went to Portland, Maine, which you can fly into from Chicago. I'm pretty sure
the food there is incredible. It's super walkable. If you feel like being on your feet a ton, you can be. If you don't, you can just chill and eat oysters and whatever. And two we drove up to bar Harbor, Acadia. My wife bah Bah Jody with and I was what five six months pregnant. We totally dominated Acadia a lot of easier hikes, but it's beautiful, beautiful, beautiful up there was not humid again, great food. I'd never been to Maine. I have zero regret about doing it. I had a wonderful time.
All right, let's go to Aarin here. Question for a generation good one. What are your thoughts on groomsman gifts? Most are alcohol related? And after being in a bridal party for a dozen or so weddings, I have all the engraved flasks I will ever need. Follow up question, can you give a power ranking.
Of the different levels groom and gifts?
Okay, so just let's I mean, he's got a bunch here. Let's let's talk through our theories around groomsman gifts I gave. Yeah, I So we did two things. First Off, they everyone bought suits for our wedding and we were able to negotiate a pretty serious discount, so everyone ended up getting a decent suit at a very very reasonable price. But secondly, everyone got the tie as well, so we threw in the tie. I agree completely with Aaron. Don't go with
the engraved flask please, yeah, please? So I've never used mine once. What is the best gift that you've received as a groomsman, I received a toilet a tree bag.
Oh that actually I liked that a lot.
I received a toiletry bag with an engraved or I guess not engraved, an embroidered h on it that I use still to this day, probably ten years later. That was the best gift I've gotten. It's simple, it was probably very affordable, and it's got extreme utility.
If you were a groomsman for me, and I had gotten you that gift, which I think is a very good idea great a one percent, would have been beautifully embroidered whatever it was cloth or leather, it would have been beautifully and tastefully embroidered with ties potty bag. It would have really gone for that irony there.
But I thought that would have gone with Pinch Stripe Bowl champions But that's now that's it went up.
It would be lined with the Penn Stripe Bowl Championship shirt. I don't I mean, you get a portable charger, that's great. I just want I want something useful. I want people to get something useful out of it. Maybe it's embroidered, whatever it's engraved, I would probably go If I get married again, which I really hope I don't have to.
I would probably do what my friend Scott gave both Jody and myself as gifts for the Solid Baby, which were really just gifts for us premium sweatpants, m premium sweats, because I know they're just going to get a ton of use. They don't need to be personalized whatever. If I don't know what brand does the best and softest and most ridiculously comfortable sweatpants, that's what I'm doing. I'm not overthinking it. I'm just giving somebody a gift that they're going to get a ton of use out of.
Or fire extinguishers, yeah, okay, or just something that will save their life.
I've got two more questions here, and then we'll go all right, let's do it along the same lines of a wedding. Someone writes in going to a wedding this weekend an old coworker of mine. The entire table I will be at is former co workers and boss that don't exactly love each other.
Mm hmm.
I'm expecting several to be openly hostile with one another. Thoughts on how I should approach.
This, Oh gosh, hit on all of their daughters, Yeah, if they're of age, I don't know. I don't know if he's the only one that he knows there, Like outside of these uncomfortable coworkers, I can get hit the dance floor hard. I don't know, stay away, leave early. I think can have a great time. And he says it here I didn't read it. He says that he is the Switzerland of the group. Nobody really hates me, at least not that I know of. So that puts you in a situation. I guess you could. Yeah, I
guess you could find a common enemy. Like if nobody there is from accountant and they're like, oh, these idiots accounting couldn't even make it, and you find the common enemy. I think.
I think it's actually quite simple for him. If he is it's your lind Yeah. And if to his knowledge no one has beef with him, he should be able to go up to whoever he wants and chat with them. It doesn't have to be awkward for him. He says, there's an open bar. He literally will not know anyone else at the wedding, and he's wearing a light purple shirt with navy pants, so that that's friendly. That gives you a talking point you can break the eyes pretty easily.
And if no one hates you, you should have the latitude to go up to whoever you want, just chat him up at your take, shat him up.
But like, the only thing you have in common with them? Is this what it is? An ex coworker? He says, it's limited, the old limited ceiling of yeah, old coworker. Yeah. So you don't really have much talk about you just catching up about kids and stuff like that. So you make small talk. You go up to the bride and groom. You're like, listen, I'm so touched that you invited me.
At some point, I'm gonna leave, and you know, I'm probably not gonna say goodbye because you're saying go bye to all sorts of people, and then you usually fifteen minutes later.
Two other points here that I want to bring up before we get to our final question. Okay, yeah, two other ways that you could play it, sir, if you're interested. Depends how dangerous you feel. Oh god, he says. He's wearing the purple shirt and the navy pants, white purple shirt. You're colorful, he says, literally, he won't know anyone else at the wedding. There's a chancey single.
Yeah, colorful plus one yeah friendly.
That could be a nice recipe for you, just saying, or option B if you're really feeling saucy right before you're ready to leave. If these aren't people that you're particularly friendly with, maybe just throw a nice little grenade at the table and say, then you guys all used to hate each other, and then leave.
I mean, then you don't really get to see the fireworks, though.
Just get the party started. Leave on a high note. Assume that you're going to get the fireworks started.
Okay, that just seems evil. I like you. I like where your head is at, though I do final we have a final duo of questions final due all right, span the same topic.
This is the most random question we got from a long time listener. Okay, iuld you rather fight a silver backed gorilla or take a two year prison sentence? Uh?
To your prison. There's a chance that I can go to a nicer minimum security.
Also, if you fight a gorilla, it will kill you so that it will answer sentence.
Yeah, it's two questions about wedding speeches, key ingredients? Any tips for a speech.
Toast compliment the bride early? I always, always, always and don't try to be funny.
Don't try to be funny.
It's really hard to be funny under pressure unless your pros like Dan and I. Yeah, don't try to be funny under pressure. It usually isn't as funny as you think.
Usually you'll say something that isn't meant to be funny, but you sort of deliver it in an awkward fun way and it'll get laughs.
Compliment the bride early, the good Yeah, it's the best tip. Compliment her early. Get on the good side of the crowd, and then don't try to be funny. Something from the heart, something genuine, keep it short, get off the stage.
Nobody cares about your friendship with the bride or groom. Nobody cares about your friendship with the bride and groom and other friends there at table seventeen. Yeah, your speech should be about their relationship. Thank you, the two people getting married. Such a good point. It should be under three minutes. You introduce yourself, you introduce your the relationship to the bride and groomer whoever's getting married, and you talk about how you know whoever, and then you say
Ted has always been like this. Ted has always been pretty wild, but deep down, he's a big softy And that's when I knew when he met Alison that they were going to get along because and you're just you're honoring them as a couple. You're not talking about everybody knows you like your friend. Dig deep and find something likable about them as a couple, and then get off the stage. You're doing great because the odds are you
probably had a couple of drinks. Yep, So just edit, edit, keep it about the couple and why it's great that they're getting married.
Everyone wants to hit the home run with the speech. Yeah, how about you just try to make contact. How about you hit a single? How about you get on first base? How about you get the run in a sacrifice fly? Just don't strike out?
Yeah? Four yards of carry.
All right, Dan, We've covered some ground here, haven't.
We We have. I've been very happy with this, all right.
Soliverbal at gmail dot com as always, is the email address right in. We'll do more of these, we promise before the season starts. You've got plenty of time to kill. Yes, we don't forget to subscribe to the show. If you like the show. Anywhere where you can find a podcast, you can find the Solid Verbal if you'd like some old episodes going out to your website solid verbal dot com, and if you'd like to follow us on a day
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I will try my best for one out there.
If you're on the way to a picnic or a party, please do travel safely. We hope to hear from you and talk at you about a week from today.
Drink your Japanese pickle juice soda, Drip it down.
For that guy over there, my good friend Dan Rubenstein, form myself, Tie Hildebrandt. Enjoy the rest of your week, all of your holiday weekend, and in the meantime, stay solid peace.
