#298: Super Israel

Welcome to the snarts Egg.

You're about to teach your buddy's glazed by the great Chris ray God, Derek black Belt and Tom Sweety.

Sit back and prepare for some shop.

Sit back and prepare for some blazing glory.

But no, hello, everybody, Welcome to the Snark Tank Podcast. It's me Chris, it's him Derek, it's I don't know, one of.

The fucking hooded creatures from fucking North.

Yes, that was that was way too early.

Not a minute has passed.

We'd even get into the hype of it. We just just said something. You just set a slur.

Okay, I absolutely.

From the beginnings I have the forefront of of that will happen.

But I couldn't resist, you know, because I'm just like, look at this guy.

You got like one of those what are those.

Hooded creatures called the Star Wars sand people?

The Java?

Oh, the those guys, those the Tuscan Raiders thought they are sand people.

Also also pole but the Jawas.

Okay, the little guys with they they walk around and and they steal.

Yeah, and then they steal and they feel.

I hate that they steal. It's like, oh man, what doesn't they that is their whole m though, is that they steal?

How do you know they do they steal? Or do or does their culture just not acknowledge this the concept of ownership?

They still still from the get upset. Oh, I guess that there goes that.

I guess.

I guess to us, it would obviously still be stealing, right, like say, of a culture didn't recognize killing someone as murder, you know, like you're like, oh, you murdered that guy, that that was homicide.

Like but it would just be like there just be life is not sacred.

Yeah, exactly who cares?

I don't care this guy, this fucking just something. Just want to slap them.

You know, you should take a gun and put it in your penis and then don't turn it on.

You're like the type of person that would turn on the turn on the gun. That's like it's turn on the gun is like turn on the dark, sid turn off the dark. Now, that's like one of those things where it's like, you know, what is it glorious bases where he does the wrong three Yeah, like if you if you said turn on the gun in like a like like that's what.

Yeah, you'd be fucking destroyed.

Yeah, you're an alien, like, oh you're a bitch. You're a lip dard in disguise. Yeah, you're lip harden disguise. Yeah, it's like I forget for a forget Patroon of Compass the star tank over there, send us money and then we'll reward you with like a little special we'll send.

It's a it's a raffle.

So if you, if you, if you donate to this show right now today, you enter into a raffle and one of you will be visited by all three of us. We're all gonna fly out to meet you. We're gonna pick one lucky winner every single day, mm hmm, and we're gonna we're gonna fly out.

We're gonna fly asp me.

This is a promise. And if you don't win, and you keep playing and you don't win, just rest assured somebody is winning. Don't talk amongst yourselves to corroborate this. We are going out there and visiting each and every one of you.

Yeah, and there will be uh picture proof and it will definitely not be a I or anything.

Right, it won't be a I. It will be like it will pass every single possible doctor sEH.

This is like insanely.

Were there entered a chance to beat us, to storm your house, like the capital. You should do a crypto coin. We should do a coin. We should do mean like why not? Yeah, at this point scams are legal, I guess.

I mean, at this point, I'm actually down because I know the vast majority of our listeners are not that like grossly stupid.

Yeah, I feel like our listeners would would pimp our our coin out to other people from outside.

They'll get a part of the of the of the dump.

Yeah, we'll cut you all in. We'll cut you all in. Yeah, not much.

You'll get something in return, but like we'll get you'll get Sweeney's entire share.

He's always fucking late to.

The you'll get like you'll get like an underwear sulked and piss. Well, let's send you that.

Yeah, yeah it does.

He looks like some like like a ninja that would be late to his assassination. He does.

He does look like a late untimely like like he looks like an impunctual ninja.

Yeah, let's think if I kill you when you're not expecting it, if I don't expect when I kill you, then you're really fucked.

So let me send this out. Let me send this message rafts to the audience. I'm curious as to what people will think about this. Yeah.

So we typically try to do the show.

Around eleven o'clock in the morning, right, Typically it never is that. It's usually like eleven thirty. This time it was twelve because Kickson was Kingson was late. He had to stay late to help set up a what a bed frame?

Yeah yeah, not even like a dungeon or something cool, like, what the fuck am I gonna do set up a dungeon in my two by two outs? Fucking you can always have that kitchen in your dungeon that you've always wanted. Stop, Bro, I cannot believe you brought that back. I escaped that. I am sad.

I'm sorry. It lives within me.

I don't even know what you're talking about it.

That's to make it. He was like, I can't believe you showed me.

I'm not gonna say it. I don't want to roo, I don't I want the melody to creep back into your mind.

I'm not going to remember, I promise you know how. I know I'm not going to remember.

I didn't sleep at all last night.

Oh okay, I'm wired in a weird way and I had coffee. I'm fucked up right now.

Kitchen in a dungeon. I swear, I swear I'm gonna bang Paul.

Fool I'm not touching it.

Come on, man, I can't say the beginning because then they'll give it away immediately.

Doesn't give it away a while, he wasn't really the orbit.

You can't touch me at all. Kitchen and a dungeon.

I swear I'm gonna bang Paul.

Are you as Are you as less as I am?

No, there's a bunch of dumb idiots that are, like, I think so hard.

Their teeth are going through their notes, they're like laughing through the.

Old I'll give you. I'll give you a massive hint.

China. That's the best. That's a kitchen and a dungeon. China.

China is the best hit, the best hint I could give you.

Whatever. Nothing happened since we recorded last apparently not much. Anyway.

You said you wanted to say you want a little special message.

Dude, I just wanted like, I'm I'm so fucking proud, I'm so I'm so proud of those people that so so Trump is uh hanging out with you know, the ultimate war criminal bb Ne Yahoo.

Right, they're both war you know, they're.

You mean and you who he was hanging with? What that I remember that I absorbed that is I'm.

Gonna take the talk reminds me of him at that moment, and I'm gonna know that is that is that I wonder what it's so bright?

Yea. I saw him of the Grammys and I was like, as a fashion, I was like, I literally look like that every day.

Oh yeah, just like in a black and like black pants.

I don't understand. I don't understand high fashion. I'm never gonna understand it. It's always been like eluded me. Like there's times where I see like very ornate things. Yeah, but I think that's the ornate. So I think that's the point of them being so.

Like I think for them. But I also I'm like, I think that's I think that will never.

Not be stupid, like the idea between of it, because like some ornate ship, like like the fucking Vatican looks cool the way they dress, and that's objectively show you ornate, you know.

So there's like there's a medical dress. That is, it's supposed to look a certain way.

I think that, yeah, and it's like it's I love it, but say, if you're gonna practical me, like a really deep down me, It's like, well, of course that's stupid and wasteful and all that shit. But the part of me that wants to live in a like whimsical fantasy world, that shit's the awesome and a fashionist I want them to keep up that ship, right, the performative stupid bullshit, And when he does that normal fucking I'm just gonna be in a black pants that you can get from Ross and a black shirt.

So I'm like, dude, get the fuck out of here at that show.

I don't understand the difference in those things. I just I don't know, man. I've never been a fashion person. I have cousins who no way really just even like suits.

I just don't.

I just don't care about like adornment. I've never been that kind of person. I like suits, but I like a good suit.

I'm just like out of shape, so I don't like wearing suits because I like how I like how fitted suits look, and then if you're not in shape, they look terrible.

I simply refuse to be out of shape.

I mean, do you have any choice? I huh, do you have any choice to be out of shape?

I think I could have.

I could get out of shape. I think you think so.

Yeah, I would kill yourself where you truly out of shape? I think you would probably die.

What do you mean you'd probably get like extreme, like have some sort of cardiac pile before you truly Oh, probably, I just don't.

I just don't I can actually get fat, though.

I don't think I can get fat.

Yeah, I don't think.

I think I can get a gut maybe, yeah, you know, like your gut.

I think you'd have to.

But I think it's still like you would end up there's really bad, Like you'd end up in prison, like prison probably, but like end up at a hospital before you even develop any sort of gut.

Be difficult for me to a man like I might get like a little bit pudgy in my sixties based on my parents, because their parents are not really they're not fat people at all.

Yeah, I'm small with a small small person in general.

My I's very small.

Your dad is like not not big definitely, like I wouldn't see.

I understand he's like slowed down, like you know age, and then he's not killing as many vcs.

Yeah, you know, he's like like, oh my god.

He lives.

No, No, there's no VC new. I forgot. I forgot to intro the show. Welcome to the stark Type podcast. Over to patreon dot com. Did I do that already?

Ye?

Holy shit, I forgot the skits.

I forgot the stark Tank podcast.

Go over to Patreon.

Complast the snark Tank, send a dollar to him.

I don't know what what's that about.

Let's just let the Restless podcast be a continuous loop of introing.

All right, guys, welcome to the start.

I feel really.

Bad of it, like, oh my god, I'm watching someone get dementia.

That would be terrifying. Oh yeah, but funny too quick shout out.

It was all. It was just a little quick shot.

I didn't go on and on about that. I just there's there's a lot of good people in this country that are very practical and smart and really understand the.

You know, yeah, the complicated and intricate web of geopolitics.

Yeah, vote because I don't feel like either already's dealing with the Green Party.

Yeah, there's like, oh, this guy is doing a bunch of horrible times. Well, yeah, there's that, but it's just I think at this point, it's just it's just shout out to those guys, you know, like we're at a point where none of that ship matters anymore, with the oh lesser or two evil, this, this and that and all this ship. I'm just like, brother, I love you guys. You guys make very good decisions. The guy that you some of you supported, and some of you just abstained

So you know, choot huld.

They should be raped and then thrown to the wine.

I mean, look, you said it, and I'll be honest, I won't. I won't do anything about it. If that happened, I'm gonna do anything.

I won't even say anything. Yeah, because he said what is it? There were people who were like, uh, well, Kama was really bad on the the Israel Palestine issue, She's really bad about the Palestinians, and then uh so it's.

Like fuck you.

I think I think it was like I remember seeing a tweet it was like gods, I had spoken Kamala or something I remember, and now like Trump's like, we're gonna take over Guz and we're gonna take if we have to, We're gonna make it. We're gonna we're gonna drop a fat man on it, and so Cyanara.

But a bunch of people there here from all over all over ambassadors history doesn't work, and I'm like, it doesn't change.

I'm like, bro, what I am seeing?

So I do like that the people that were speaking like that are now not taking any responsibility at all, but also being like why.

You blame me? Why are you blaming voters?

You blame why the voter blame I'm like, well, because the voters are the ones that choose the people.

What are you talking about?

So even though there's a bunch of snakes and Charlatan's in there, it's our job to keep them out.

It would be like it would be like if an exten you call an exterminator, right, and they came to your house and they unleashed forty rats, right yeah, And then you're like you're pissed off at the exterminator for doing that.

You're like, why are you mad at me? Should you be mad at the rats.

There are rats in here, you know that, right.

There are rats in here that deserve way more immediate attention than mere rats.

I think I would turn into the joker if that happened.

Oh yeah, and that scenario, I would laugh. I love that this has become I would laugh. Fah did this happen? When did the terminology of like, I will become the joker? Like?

When did that become part of the like just the joker's idea of the maximum descent?

I guess that really is it's your one bad day. Yeah, yeah, that just sends you over the edge.

It used to be going postal, but that's not there's that's not good enough.

Cause well it doesn't happen anymore. People don't people don't shoot up. Uh.

They graduated from the post office to the.

Schools, to the schools.

You know, It's like it went from adults being fed up with work and life going postal to yeah, kids young being edgy, not even fed up with life, just like I mean, I guess that blots he was kind of fed up. He said he was tired of being bullied, and then he was like, Nazis are cool. He shout out Candis OANs and blah blah blah whatever shadow canvass but blah blah subscribe to canzones at least off.

Yeah, that was funny.

I mean I got like, in hindsight that because clearly Beautie Pie didn't inspire.

It's just like, how unfortunate he just has it. He just obvious to be the most popular person in the world. How fucking unfortunate is That does suck?

That's why he left. I'm pretty sure that's why I was, like, I'm gonna go to Japan.

I told if I would do I would have actually did that a long time ago. I don't need I feel like there is a uh, like, there's a YouTuber who's said that he was grifting in like the metal community. He was making like metal content about bands and shit like that, and then he he allegedly said he hit his like threshold and he met his financial goals. He went on a podcast and said, yeah, I don't care about music at all, Like I don't listen to any of this ship like I just did my thing.

And the thing that's weird because I'm like, I want to believe you.

But also he has like so many shirts and he talks about anecdotal things, and so it's like it's the anecdotale thing true. He's he's either like like he's like perfect cell grift, like he's like so perfect at it.

He's look at his hand, it is perfect.

And Kril's bunching the funk out of him.

He's like, I look, poor krillon Crillon's cool man. People shouldn't kill hi way too much.

Even in like I finally played the story of UH Fighters Fighters, so even you know, a million year old game, and the first thing, like, so you start running into those clone people and Krilling is getting dog walked clothes like everybody else is kind of like.

They're holding their own. Crillon's clones were powerful.

He's fucking loan out fighting him, and it's like, how does this make sense?

Weaker than my.

Clone because his clone doesn't have any doubt.

That's the only thing is that he's not even the weakest human. It's Yama weaker than the weakest human's histo, he's the well, I guess out of.

The then why is he in Dragon Ball z idiot?

He's not a Z fighter.

He can't.

What makes somebody a fighter?

They have to be able to use key and stuff that have to be after use his key and ship he used key.

I can't.

He just can't like shoot a blast, just.

Can't fly or sense energy.

I feel like his bomb and smarking zero is a kind it must be.

It's a kid to a bob. It's not a key bass, it's a bomb. Now it's kind of make bombs.

The fact that he has so many of them, and it kind of indicates that he might actually have the strongest key of anybody. He's gonna use his key to turn things into technology.

Piccolo, Well, yeah, but you can make things.

He can. Yeah, he can make clothes and he can make things coetic. I'm sorry I didn't say things. I said clothes, Yeah, because of limits it he can make anything. Yeah, that's what we said, things that we elaborated, clothes and we were gonna keep going, and he went back to things.

He can make clothes, make rocks.

Don't forget things things he makes. Definitely forget about the things that he makes.

They recently made him tell kinetic. It was like, Piccolo can't, Oh, we can move things in his mind?

Why not? Though?

I think the Meccans can just conveniently do whatever they can do. It's always been sort of like that, but I guess they don't need to, like why would It's like, it's like they're like slow vampires still eat food.

Why do they have tongues? Foodsucking delicious?

Why do they have tongues if they don't eat food.

That's a good They like to taste the water.

It's a good point.

They don't need the water the ground.

They don't need to speak because otherwise when they just.

I mean, like, couldn't they they insane? Actually, it's quite literally the most wild shit ever. They can also grant wishes to the means are terrifle.

How would you say piccolo without a tongue?

I think I would just say piccolo with my mind.

Out loud, and then it works out loud, and it would work because it's because he's in a.

Meccan they can do whatever they can. Hear about I want you to try to pronounce piccolo without a tongue, pickle.

Kind of well, fucking nerd.

He didn't even say his name. They're like, what, get out of here?

I think I think they're the coolest part of dragon balls must a means are cool? I like when the arms get all stretchy.

Yeah, isn't that canonically not one of their abilities?

Stretching?

Yeah, I remember, I feel like I remember being in like it was in the Lord's Slug movie.

Could do that.

It never happened in the show.

I think No, I think Piccolo Piccolo arms definitely.

King Piccolo yea, but a little Piccolo didn't, Ye Junior did? Yeah, I have to.

I'm gonna he's too busy. He's too busy boxing like a human. That's because King Piccolo, like Piccolo Jr. Is like Piccolo, he totally said.

But younger Piccolo like, he's just kind of he's just on earth, chilling with people, being like a man. I like humans, but I don't want to be around him and ship always are a farming it's in saying how pretty much every time he shows up, he shows up in hemos badass fashion.

You are clearly Toama's favorite character.

Bro.

A lot of characters do that and then they get immediately washed. That happens a lot who shows often mostly Piccolo shows up, and then he gets washed.

Everyone supposed been get to beat other than go yeah, vegeta, vegeta, vegeta all the time.

He explodes out of the ice.

It's just like and then he gets his ass whipped and he gets immediately it's so odd for him. Expect it sucks because a lot of times he trains so fucking hard. Except for the margin thing, right, that was the only one where he got like I'm gonna cheat then and then he's still I still feel so bad for him where he's like, all right, I'm done with you, and then Goku just like comes like long hair and then like he's like a super saying three.

I feel so I feel so bad for Vegeta so much. I'm like, Vegeta just gets shipped on so bad.

He just wants to be really powerful, and he's he's watching different shows from us. Yeah he's not. He's the main character his show.

Before I forget to patre on a com slash the Snart tank Bug before the So before the show, I made the mistake. I'm so sad I didn't. I didn't catch Derrick's reaction on camera because I was so sure he'd seen this already.

But like I showed him the Amelia Perez.

And if those of you who are not familiar, look up Amelia Perez and clicking on like one of the first videos usually because it is going to be this song about like it's called vaginal vagino plasty or whatever that ship uh and he I watched him die. It was it just didn't it didn't sound real.

So first I was confused for the first like good ten seconds so that I heard, and then it hits that one line like penis and vage I know, and I'm just like, in no scenario, what I what the fuck is this?

Pull out his hand?

He doesn't have time to eat in your hour being late?

This package this packed? No, it wasn't I have losing the life. When did you?

When did you do it?

A few days ago? I like, I pre made him a few.

Them, so the lettuce is just in there pre oh my, did you freeze it? Yeah?

Okay, I guess that's better.

But it takes no time to make a sandwich.

It is a weird thing to do.

It's like meal prep your milk prepping sandwich.

Yeah I did.

It takes a long time and making bad time.

Sandwich last night and it took me twenty seconds.

I usually meal prep like Mondays, the meal prep most of the food in our house.

I kind of like, I kind of want to expect. Gordon Ramsey had the signature. It's usually with salmon, like if it was undercooked or whatever, he would.

Just smashing it. Just everywhere it is exploded as salmon shrapnel.

Yeah, essentially, and I I adore that. And that's I'm so tempted. I've never heard of anyone meal prepping a sandwich before.

It is interesting. I've never I've ever seen even do that.

You mean you prep like like dinners or like meals.

Like something that actually takes a long time like that, Like, yeah, my beans takes a long time.

So I'm like a huge batch, right, put.

Them a little zip box. I put him on a freezer. There, meet this lady.

Does it get worse?

I feel like probably bothered. See that's the thing where it's like, it takes so little time to make a sandwich.

You might fresh.

You might as well do the fresh, the.

Fresh you'll get it because everything will be much better, like the crispiness of the Uh.

I don't care.

I don't put I don't put any My sandwich is basic.

Meat, cheese and bread.

Yeah, yeah, I'm not I do I do tomato and let Yeah it's not I guess it's not that much more effort to just slap it on, right.

It's like watching what do they call him, the Sandwich.

Artists or whatever.

You watch the Sandwich Yeah, that's the that's.

Then the sandwich Sandwichers.

Wild.

That's fucking that's crazy.

That Postrami and he's like fighting Astrami.

But what is it?

Astami?

It's what It's like a vinegar. It's like a vinegar cured b for something, vinegar something like that. What do you say, viniggured? It's vinegar, vineyard, vinegard. I'm getting like your body vinegar, vin vin nigger, vinegar vinegar.

That's what it is, vin vin nigger. What do you say?

I think I said it like ten times.

Yeah, there's no there's no inn in your what you're saying. Stop saying that vinegar vinegar. I guess there isn't.

In subtle, it's a vinegar.

It's a subtle is like like the you and like it's like I can't even hear.

Yeah, yeah whatever there, move on's get the hell out of here.

I want to explode yourself with so badly. Actually, I would be down for a twenty four hour, twenty four minute hour, twenty four hour fucking podcast.

I would say so much.

Wow, I'm obsessed with I love how that sounds.

It's so good.

Yeah. Anyway, let's go on the questions. Since there's not really anything going on in the news, we covered everything. We recorded kind of we recorded. Oh Trump's dead.

Oh shit, that'd be crazy, That'd be insane.

I would laugh. I would laugh myself into a coma. I think i'd follow him. That's how much i'd laugh.

That would be yeah, amazing one day, one day it will happen. One day, it will I think it's gonna answer one day, and it needs to be brought up back casually too.

Yeah, Trumps dead, Trump's dead.

Okay, want of questions question, Let's go over to Mike Sapien. Mike Shapion wrote in this is our February question thread.

Before you, I just want to ask you one question before. Are you getting any more bots more than usual on Twitter?

I'm not on Twitter anymore. Actually I got bands. I was like, all right, fucking you see any I actually straight up have not checked it, like I'll go on to like see like what a friend pose, I'll like something, but I don't post there anymore.

And I and my DMS.

I shut those off ages ago because it was just like it was all bots and I was like, this is actually like completely purposeless.

The bert but it has got a funny just to see them pile up though it's the it's getting repetitive though it's the same ones.

It's it's it's always like the same lady with the business profile and they're like, we want to work together with you. We love your content. Yeah, like you don't. I don't make anything. Yeah, yeah, I'm getting more.

Yeah, that's so I'm not alive.

You're talking too.

Sorry, I killed myself. Reminders like when it's some guy, some guy was, uh that was day for three months, some guy in New York City.

I'm gonna ignore that. Some guy in New York City was trying to sell me a CD.

He's like, you know, it's one of the CD people walk up to you like the and they hand you a CD and then you pick it up and then they like, that'll be fifty dollars.

I was walking by him, He's like, AYOCD.

I was like and I I said, I'm sorry, I can't im retarded and I just walked by him and you completely ignored it. The best we go to handle those things. I think if you say sorry, I'm retarded, I can't do it. Yeah, that's good.

I like that, h because they're not they're either.

The thing about that is like they're not gonna question you, and if they do, they're gonna be like impressed that you're self aware enough for having, you know, for being in that situation and understanding what's happening to you. I like that, And they're not gonna want to bother you. They're not gonna want to rip you on.

It's way better than me just saying I'm gay.

Gay's pretty good as well.

It sometimes it works. Sometimes they actually more Sometimes they're gay yeah, and then they're like oh cool, oh yeah and they're gay yeah. So that means we're automatically to have sex because that's what gay people do exactly.

That's I've been led to believe that this is how gay people function in society.

Yeah, you know, you know, like straight people could do that. Stupid damn, it's like will they won't they? Yeah? Gay people are like, oh, we're gay, and then we immediately drop our past driving sex.

If you lock eyes with a gay person, as another gay person, you're you've committed to sex?

Yeah, yeah, what do you think so you would know about this?

Yeah? You would? Yeah.

How do you like it?

Is?

It is?

It is that you like that better?

You like being gay?

Yeah? It's a job anyway. Mike Saviian roadies the salutations, Messrs, Messrs Mom Than Jameson and pilot Uh. In his twenty twenty four campaign, Trump took the YMCA, formerly a promotional song for the actual IMCA and then an LGBTQ anthem, and turned it into the unofficial MAGA theme song. Yeah, if you were running for president, what would your YMCA be? What unrelated and undeserving song would you ruin for everybody else?

I love this idea.

I never even thought about the possible possibility of like picking a song for me and my campaign that would retroactively ruin it for people that I don't like.

Interesting, but like the Journey if people like you. Small Time Boy, the Journey soft is a small time.

A small time boy was just a small time boy growing up in South.

The tree I would take I would take that ship. I would take that and I would co opt it from White America and it'd be so mad.

Bro.

Small time Boy is amazing, hey train, because he's.

A boy, just a city, small town boy, just a swimmer in the city.

Small town, a city small.

It goes a small town boy.

I'm trying.

I'm trying to think of I'm trying to think of like a song that.

Because that would be I would be fall boy, a small town, small town boy. All right, I'm trying to think of like a conservative anthem.

I think I would.

I would actually, I think I would pick uh the I would I think I might do uh the what is it the the lead Greenwood song?

Yeah, I would.

I would hijack that from them, and I would be like, I'm proud to be an American where socialism can run free. I like it.

Rerite it and I would or something would Who else do they hate?

Who's like? Uh?

And it's been a while since they've had like actual individual enemies, because now it's just like.

Yeah, thats just everybody, Yeah, everybody on the view?

Yeah, the views. I think there's fun. That's like, I know, Megan, Wait McCain, Megan.

McCain, what is this like Frankenstein?

Well, yeah, actually so John McCain couldn't lifted John McCain dog so savagely in a POW's that he can't lift his arms past this height, and so it's you.

Know, we clowned him back in the day.

It's because look, he was a pow, but also he's a piece of ship, so I don't care.

He didn't he didn't get like Mussolini. Yeah, you know, he didn't get like beats his ship like he that photo of him, by the way I looked it up, it's it's instant. He looks like Sander Cohen from fucking BioShock. It's crazy.

I feel like he looks like not a person, Nora, he's a splicer, he doesn't.

He looks he looks like what a kid would I imagine, Like have you seen Spike Kids?

Of course I've seen Spike kids.

Like there was a depid question when they were molding that guy's face.

I'm pretty sure there was a frame mid mold where that was that guy's face, it was Mussolini's face, and the like, let's just make it a little more.

Those those I don't even know what they're called. They're like it's almost like a rage room, but they make like clay statues of people. Have you yeah, yah, yeah, where you get to slap them across the face and like the storts the face.

That looks so satisfying that that.

Would be Actually, did you do an Olympic game like that where they can see whose dick could do the most damage to a face?

You mean the Paralympics, But is that what they do is, yeah, you all get a person and I'm just saying, well, they got a jagged dick on account of my disability, jagged dick serrated Christmas, My god, it looks like it looks like a little Debbie Christmas tree cake. You know those those really you know those Christmas tree cakes that were always that were always stale.

I hate those things. I hated small Debies. Hated them a little Debra, little.

Small time Little Debbie. Those in cosmic brownies were disgusting. Man, Cosmic brownies are so great. I don't think I've ever had.

I've heard of them, but I never had one.

You should have one, because I guarantee you you're not prepared for how that takes.

Yeah, I don't want one. I think it's all coming back to me.

You guys vividly described yeah, or in detail you described how terrible they are. They're not good and I ever ate them, Like what the fuck if one?

Uh?

I think even I think it's coming back to me because I can you even still get them from around here.

And you probably can.

I think you can.

I feel like Hostess has I haven't had anything.

So I a while ding dongs the other day.

Oh really they the not expired, but they tasted expired.

So I was like cool, and then I pulled a fast one.

I was like a jojo you know, I'm well, it was actually true that I'm not eating like pastries and stuff like that anymore. It's like I need to start getting back in shape. And so I was just like, hey, you want the rest of these? And she fucking had a good time, and I'm.

Like she's she's eating gray meat for so like everything's a blessing. It was like it was gray meat gruel.

I think just I don't even think because they're not expired. I just think they make with chemicals. I think, yeah, they just by default taste inspired.

Well some of them.

Some of them are like I've had I've had them where they're like, oh this is clearly old, you know.

So maybe that's what it is. Maybe it's like, oh the box it says they're new, but these years old, I feel like host experience has been pretty good.

Actually I used to.

So that's that was my ideas. I was in Smart and Final and while I'm gonna get a box, they're like it's like a giant box.

It was like four bucks.

And I was like, oh, man, I used to kill these when I was a kid, and I ate some of them. And I'm like the ding dong, yeah, the ding dogs because I used to love ding dongs.

Yeah, they especially.

They used to come in these.

Foil they had like a little the peanut butter or no.

No, they're just like they're like chocolate covered cupcakes almost like like like a fudge covered cupcake essentially with a little cream in the middle.

Like I like.

The ones with where they got a little they got a little swirl.

Oh yeah, that's just like straight up cupcakes.

I would always eat the frosting off first and then just eat the cake after. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know why.

I like the orange cupcake one even I was like one of the people that I liked it, but I liked it.

I like citrus flavored things.

I remember having I remember having the orange one, and I remember vomiting into a bush, and then there was a kitten in the bush, and so I threw up all over a fucking straight head. He's a real story. Good cat, good cat, all right. So you got proud to be an American? To be an American? You want a small time boy? Yeah, your journeys small time boy.

Which actually I do like the idea of having a version of that and pissing people off. Like the lyrics are just slightly off.

It's it's just it's just very like fucking very leftist, left leaning, very inclusive, mad trans people.

I was a small town girl that I traded a small tempo.

You can't stop me. It's gonna happen, And God's not really cramming every they canna do it.

That tracks done it.

You're right, small town boy, small town boy.

So somebody edited that.

Somebody edited the credits just to find the credits for some random movie. Throw it.

Find an obscure eighties song that sounds like it would be like the Karate Kids, You're the best around, but.

It's not because you know, there's a bunch of songs.

Yeah, there's a bunch of songs that like have that beat, but it's clearly you're the.

Small time small that's the third question.

I like it. I wish, I like, I feel like there are better answers, but like I'm just trying to figure out, like what is it, Like, what is the song that they love.

Specifically that they can't stop. They don't they don't really have do.

See that guy fell off so hard all over Anthony? I think it is his name.

Oh yeah, yeah, I love that.

There's like screenshot of him that he's like like he's it looks like he's like like it's it's he's doing everything. He's coming, he's shitting, he's pissing, he's being stabbed, he's being shot, like it's everything all at once. He's bleeding everything everywhere, all at once. And I love that shot. But yeah, that guy died or something. And but yeah, I don't think.

I think.

I think people the good old boys don't have they don't have like real songs.

They're they're all these fleeting like what would.

You do that? You know it's like it's like it's like yeah, it's it's like ship like that that doesn't it's not timeless.

Well after nine eleven, well, I've.

Got to say that have you forgotten, and a lot of we had failed there. Maybe to see your homeland underfilure, inner people blowing away you forget?

That would be my fucking so I would. I would come after that and be like nine Evan was Earned featuring Hassan. Yeah, that's so funny, Chris.

Would I be so funny if people actually more people were killed in nine to eleven?

How many more sons like bro people are mad? Or he like?

He?

Uh, that's funny. I like those answers. I don't think there's anything.

I think those are the best ones because my answer would be very similar to your guys.

This would be some stupid but they don't.

They got to have one. Somebody let us know what is the like every boy?

Oh, it would be like a Toom McDonald's song or something like that. You know what I mean?

Well, see, but that's I feel like that's even more to the point of they don't give a funk about that. None of those one Tom McDonald's neither can I The name of Tom McDonald's song sing singles a lyric from one to even make fun of.

It, Tom McDonald made us song?

Is that not.

Trans people? None exist?

Oh? My god? Good old tomic Donald, God bless him anyway before I forget going over to patreon com slash of snark tagg So yeah, so specifically dumb got a piece of ships A man.

I want not bad to happen to him, but Donald, He's.

Not worth wishing a bad things, you know what I mean?

I want to I want to put negative energy in his life. I don't think he needs. I want like I want like.

I want his braves to give him cancer or something like that, like some than just not good.

He's gonna, like I don't even know, he's gonna be drunk on his zamboni and fall off in front of it and it's gonna run over him.

Probably he is some Canadian asshole, so he wouldn't be is a Canadian?

Yeah them, Yeah Canadian.

The person that like talks about all this American ships have the worst take about American like they are so terrible understanding American politics is crazy.

Because they drive zamboni's and eat Moose or whatever it is.

It like, I think it's stop to stop.

It's me.

It's me, not Mooses.

It's MEAs I think it's I didn't say Mooses, I said Moose.

You think said it's not Mooses.

I said moose. I'm pretty sure it's meat. He keeps saying mooses, and patential is not saying, yeah, it's weird. It's not me either, it's MEAs for sure. Look at the dictionary right now. I'll bet you two thousand.

Dollarsary right there, it says, me, what if you try to do what are you actually genuinely like?

What if you reach into your pocket? Right now?

Pulled out a genuine Webster's dictionary that you always carry, of course, and it did say, indeed that mease was was the proper term.

The capital of me was the capital.

The capitol of MEAs is capital.

He gross, Yeah, I don't know what you're not by man, it's goose and geese.

So it's moose and mease.

All right, So the sharp pain behind my right eye rown and he says, hey, rock O Heifer.

And Philbert was the last one.

Philbert, Philbert, Philbert.

Philbert, gotcha, I am the chase.

I love that it was weird.

He was literally just a Jewish guy. Yeah, yeah, he literally was.

So there's eight seasons on Amazon, but there's that can't be real, it's not. There's only four. I know very that's my favorite Nick show. There was four seasons, and I'm like, why does it say eight seasons? You go to season five and there's.

I think it.

I think that there's eight seasons in the show, as in like eight different types of climate. Climate.

Doesn't mean if they're were four morezens, what the fun would they even down the middle? They have to half to eat like a half slice of pizza.

It'd be sminter, warmer, sprawl, spring swing.

Ring.

Gave you, you just gave you eight seasons, perfect, perfect, all right, this is this is gonna be minded under my regime.

This is what it's going to be.

For no fucking reason. It's gonna be like the what is it? The Julius and August the Caesar? How they added their fucking names into the months and completely fucked it.

Up, ruined it was literally it was literally a ten totem and they fucking ruined it. Because of course, of course.

I wouldn't even mind it if if they if they just put it at the end, it should be ten, shouldn't be no, But listen, they put it at the end was the problem.

What do you mean? What do you mean?

What do I mean? Fool.

They put it at the end of what of the months?

You know that? Okay, so you know what I'm saying.

No, how October if you would have put it, if you would have put those new months at the end, then October would still mean eight and December would still mean ten. But they.

I guess, yeah, but it would still fun. The system would still.

Be fucked up though.

That's I have no problem with the fact that it's twelve. My issue is the fact that twelve doesn't mean twelve, and ten doesn't mean ten, and eight doesn't mean eight.

Yeah, but like that's my issue. Okay, so you have autism, then so.

You know about that.

You're mad about the like the part where it's like, oh, I don't like where it's located, not the fact that it throws out of balance everything that exists prior to it.

I think it's double what's I think it's dorble like double jeopardy. Well, I'm bothered.

I'm bothered by things pretending to mean something and then not meaning them.

Yes, absolutely crazy.

Of course, I'm bothered by the fact that it was a ten based system and it was fine.

Added the ruined it. We still had leap years because of that. No, we had the leaders before that, I don't think. I don't.

Yeah, we did.

There's no there's no perfect way. That's the paradox of it. You can't perfectly measure a day anyway.

I'm pretty it's it's yeah, it's not perfect twenty four obviously, it's.

Like twenty three something.

Yeah. Yeah, So you're always gonna have that that that that has them to do with the amount of months there are.

There was more days and months prior like February forty what No, what happened Maybe I don't know, there was only that happened later. I don't know when. I don't know when they clocked it, because when when they started actually like really paying in the time and stuff. I know it was probably pretty obvious after a few years that they're like, Okay, I understand it's this dad on the calendar. It should be freezing. But I'm burning up,

I know that. I know that's why they started to exist. Know that at all, Yes, I do. It's you're assuming I'm assuming.

I know you're assuming. Do you know? I know what? Do you know?

What?

Do you know what? One hundred percent sure?

Are you certain?

I am one hundred percent sure? I don't know. Actually I don't know. There you thank you're shaking me. Thank you were shaking my results.

You're welcome. I lose my lantern ring because of you right now, just fall off and I'd be like, no, Trumpuary.

It's February and trarch and tread trum try and trumpel and trump.

Trumpeling and tray Trumpuli true Trumpuli.

Just hoarding it. I love it. It just it doesn't matter Trump Trember trumpus Trumptober remember Trump Trump remember Trump member Trump Novemberary. And that's it.

I love it.

You'll get used to it. It's not you'll get used to it.

You're all game if you don't.

I love it.

This ain't gonna fuck up my business nothing, no how my calendar business.

Nothing now, my calendar business is gonna be.

Fun looking at anything fun?

Oh yeah, I like this fucking mutant man. It's like, you know, I I'm just not interested in my job at all.

So listen, my job may Rocco, Heiper and Filbert.

Oh yeah, we.

Didn't do the question. We never Yeah, that's very true. Uh A long time listener. Second type of question ask her here, I recently graduated college with a bachelor's degree in broadcasting. Do you have any advice, not about jobs, but about life after college?

No, no, thanks for your question.

Oh no, they still had thirty days, three days, even number of months.

So was there just like so it was no, it was no real difference. I guess what the are you talking about the months? Yeah?

I don't. I don't know.

I guess they just add more days, yes, they like I don't, I don't know how it was divvied up where my brain's not understanding.

What do you what do you mean? Like, what do you trying to think?

As they would they it was apparently there were still like the same days of the year, but they would just added two months now, And I'm like, well how because they're not saying that they were more days than each month. So my brain's like what to your question? Like what did they change?

Uh? Season?

Okay? He said, like, Okay, they added two months, so I guess the rotation would just come quicker.

I guess then, well they just and sometimes they just winter would be later.

I think they just slowed the earth down a little bit.

Yeah, they all like last owed the earth and pulled the other They all gathered on one side and jumped and then to keep it to move it back.

A little bit. Yeah, and give himself another month. Definitely, you would have known this if you would have paid attention in retard class. Yeah. Uh, anyway, paid attention to retard class. So I was top of the class anyway, I was the retard. No, you were your top of that class. Maybe getting hold you back in retard class.

Are you well?

Are you that's crazy?

Is that succeeding if you're a if you're Vaali class, retar class, so you fail.

If you are validatorian and retarded class, what is that you are the best reason you're the most retarded, the most retarded?

Are you the least retarded?

So? I think in I think in this scenario, clearly, I don't think there's a clearly the biggest If you're top of the class in retard class, you are the apex retard.

I feel like we're saying the heart are a lot today.

I like it. I just I just don't feel any It's not like saying Okay, when I said darth f slur, I still feel like, Okay, there's impact there.

It's not a hard doesn't feel like.

And here's the thing.

It's offensive and I can admit that I don't that's a.

Word offensive term, but it's not like as an offensive term.

The thing for me, I can also be defining negroes that's cattle, like it's.

An offensive term like that way, but we're just not using it that way.

I know we're not se it that way, but it's like, I don't know.

The thing for me is that like the it's it's a word for something for other things too, and that kind of like to me, that diminishes, that diminishes the slur value of the word.

So quite literally like faggot.

Right, But that's it. This is what I'm saying. You just said that and I've said it and had no problem. See this is what I'm saying.

Well, no, I'm I'm no right now, So right now I'm in conversation right now, now.

You're not listening to me, I'm not, but right now.

Right now I'm in conversation right when I'm when I define words I have no problem using Like if I'm if I'm reading a book that has the word nigger in it, right, and I'm reading through it, no, I'm saying, like I remember moving through it, then I think it's a complete different context you're reading right, because.

What I'm saying is so the n word only means that there's no liked my way over to the story.

It is quite different from other words in anosition there.

But but but so right, So that's the only meaning. The f slur has two meanings. It is it is the slur, and it is like the I don't know what, it's.

A few things. It's it's it's food. It's some people say it's a bundle of sticks. I've never heard anybody say that, but it's still a food. Like people over there they're like, it's just like some gravy and goat or whatever. It's the entire it's really it's there's a meal called fagots and gravy like legitimately, and it's a commercial and it's awesome.

There's a commercial like you played it on the show I did. I did a long time ago.

But so that's a couple of things.

But then retard is the most of all of it, because that is there's it's it's it's repellent.

There's so much a musical term.

It's there's a lot to like flame, retardant, retardant, to retard, like there.

It actually I mean, but I feel like the word just means so you're applying the real word to people. And people are like, that's offensive, and I'm like, well it is. It can be, absolutely, But at the same time, I'm like, it's kind of just I'm really just spitting facts. A lot of times, I don't just call it someone I think you are fucking slow, you're retarded. Like I

They're not doing anything.

Of course, they're not doing anything. It's the people I'm a it's like, say, uh.

But that could be that lot can be used for literally all of them. Like I like, I'm like, I am not. I am not absolved and abstained of using these fucking words. Look, I use these words, and I think they're funny. I think they're worse meanings.

I so that could be used for everything. But like I think, like the point that I'm making is like when I said the people that can't help it, that's the same thing will say, like the N word, the F slur, those people can't help it. So using that against them like they didn't, you're you're mad at them. So why would you attack who just who they are? But what I mean is retarded sense. I'm saying that I wouldn't go after those people who were just that's

Yeah, like I'd be I'd be upset.

So on your right, I was let me cook, and then you were like his ball flop and I'm like, I'm out, let me cook.

I just like he's not cooking his microwaven.

Let me microw that is a form of cooking.

Last of the microwave. I was going through this was at my house and I was asking people.

That's right.

We had this conversation on the show. I'm pretty sure.

Yeah, how long? Yeah? How long did you last? Like the last ten and then solid ten before, but we did because he said you probably pass out. I was thinking you probably pass out, like in like ten seconds, you would.

Your brain would be so hot, listen, it would be so warm.

I just feel like I'll believe I'll leave it at this.

I just I've seen people like retroactively call things slurs with it, like like cunt, it's not slow, Sorry, it's just not It never felt like.

There's a reasoning derogatory phrases and slurs, and I think we have to, like very much so distinguish that as well too.

Yeah.

I think all of those words are funny words, and I think they can be used comedically, and it depends on a context with they're used. I think that is ultimately what it is. I think people have the right to be offended by certain words that hurt them, that have been used to alienate. Sure, I think that is there's fair. I think all of that right.

It doesn't mean I'm gonna respect it though, I mean I'm just being honest, like, it doesn't mean that I'm going to respect. If somebody came up to me and they're like, hey, I really wish you wouldn't say, like say if they're like cunt, Like I really wish you wouldn't say cunt. I'd be like, I'm sorry, like I because they're not in my friend group first, because they know none of my friends. Whatever do is a stranger and I'm yeah, I'm like, I'm I'm sorry.

It just like I apologize. I didn't aim it towards you and not to keep it moving on, that's it.

But what I mean, And I wouldn't stop, so I'd be like anyway, so I'll just cunt. Like I would turn and start continue doing what I'm doing. I'm like, but I don't know you. I'm it's not aimed towards you or anyone you know. I'm not like you're just getting my fuck.

This stranger came up to me and like, uh, Eve dropped, eves dropped on me and like to police my language.

That would bother me.

Yeah, now here's the thing again.

When we're talking about I say derogatory like slurs like someone's dropping a bunch of hard rs.

In your thing.

If somebody was getting visibly upset up, I wouldn't do it personally. I wouldn't go up to someone and be like, hey, watch your fucking mouth, because I'm not sure it's probably gonna turn to a fight, and I'm not actively unless the guy was Unless the guy look like a fucking you know, slack jawed, like red neck, then maybe I would pick a fight because I just there's a part of me curiosity.

Yeah, you you.

Deserve a beat down. Let's that's the head.

What's your advice?

Bris Bryce Ritchell Mitchell? Sorry, that's literally that. Bryce Mitchell is a fucking dumb redneck that could beat the absolute piss out of you. He's gotten the UFC that believes every conspiracy theory imaginable.

He was the guy that's trembling. You think him trembling one?

Yeah?

Guy?

Uh? This guy uh, I think his name is josh Emmett Uh fucking knocked him out so bad that he started seizaring in the cats.

Everyone thought he died.

I'll tell you first of all, when he hit him, it sounds like a baseball bat hit him, Like, that's crazy, It's not like a metal I was.

Like, I was like, and then he was, well fucking on that note, and that guy's.

Giggling like a piglet when I saw him. Yeah, it was, but in retrospective people were scared at first. But then in hindsight, remember that guy was spouting some good old Nazis ships saying Hitler is a good guy, and he'd go fishing with him, and he was gonna get rid of all the gay Jews. And uh So, now everybody's been replaying that and saying, like, man, this was great, it was great that he that's so funny.

Well then, how do you know that's not what made him that way.

Anymore.

That knocked it out of him clean, the knocked it into him.

So some people were speculing because that's it's a new hidden power level, and that's I'll be true that he got knocked into him because he was just only flat earth and other dumb nine to eleven and all that stuff. He had enough sense to be like, Elon Musk is a piece of shit. Fuck him. He's consolidating all this money and not helping out any He can solve all the world's problems mostly if he wanted to.

I was like, oh, there's't enough sense for that. But then he's like, Hill was a good guy, and I was.

Like, dude, you know that reminds me of you know what's crazy about?

What is it?

Uh, Kingdom Become Deliverance? You know that game?

Yeah? Yeah, So they came up with a second one recently, The Family. It's very good, but it's making a lot of people back because there's like, there's a.

Black person in there too, is there?

Yeah?

And again I didn't know about the gay there was a gay guy in there. God, that's so funny.

But so like now those people are mad. And I remember the first Kingdom Home Deliverance being like a big fucking culture war thing, or at least like like an early example. I missed that the first one. I if I'm not missaing, I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure the first one there was a big deal about, like because it was supposed to be like a historically accurate like literally like it's committed to the mundanity of like the historical accuracy of that of that time period

It was right, Yeah, you had to go dig for the one person had an op ed or whatever.

Yeah, yeah, I understand. It wasn't really that huge and it was like very successful obviously, and this one is too. But it's it's so funny because it's just like, dude, this this one series just seems to piss.

Off everybody by doing nothing wrong.

I feel like people, I feel like people get so manimal history and genuinely don't know history.

What are you talking about?

I think they don't care. That's the biggest thing they care. But it's like, dude, there were black people in the Roman Empire. They exist, that's not the that's not the Roman, understand. But like these period.

Pieces, well you mean like there have been black people people were taking things. Yeah, like there there's they're notable. If you look into history, you'll be like, oh, particularly this black guy was written about because there was like four of them in the general vicinities are like, oh, this guy is particular. I mean, let's write a story

Blah blah blah blah. They just probably never even considered it.

But like there's plenty of pictures of like black kids being there and having obviously a rough time.

They chose to be a part of it.

Not exactly, but they were present by proxy.

Right, You're just in there, like there's there's plenty of anyway, it is a Nazi by proxy, Nazi proxy Barunfortunately, you're just like you go on a vacation. You're like, shit, man, what is it is this poland.

Anyway?

Advice, hey man, I would say master gooning, Like I think you should master it. And what I mean by that it sets up to you.

What I mean, what I mean by that, it's up to your.

Big big advice, big advice of someone that just finished college. Uh, take your time and understand that you may not find a job immediately, but it does not diminish your worth. That is the biggest thing I could tell you about someone finishing college. I hate niggas I think that I've been.

I've been.

I've been around several people that have finished college. I of portunately, when I finished my second time, of my associates, I didn't go into that field, but I understand that it is a rough gambit trying to find a job, and you will find one.

Don't let your self devou yourself. Also, don't not let your parents or people around you tell you that you're not looking hard like if you take your time and apply yourself and look into things. Also, final certifications.

I don't really think it works exactly for journalism, but I think having a obviously, I'm assuming you already have like a blog or something to show your categorty. So just you know, just go step by step. You're not you're not You're not a failure. You not find a job.

No, he's a failure and such a glorious time. One thing I do want to pick it back on the people. If anyone says you're not looking hard enough, punch them

Yeah, all right, that's we got another question, really hard whipper, we got another question.

It's a follow up. It's a follow up.

Oh what's up?

So ju Judah Wong loves you wrote and he says, greetings to LA's firestarters. Uh, just give you guys an update about the girlfriend meeting my friends. Do you remember this.

Kind of Oh oh yeah, yeah, like yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

So he said, well, Derek, you were right, we didn't work out. I'm not sad or anything. You just thought it'd be funny to write an update.

Yeah, man, Well, could you give a little further for the view the people who may not understand.

See, here's the issue with the names is that I don't remember who said this, and.

It's not I don't mean like who said it, just the premise to like, so this person their original question. Yeah, like I was trying to talk about inviting your like having her friends meet their girlfriend. Yeah, but it's also about like having the sense of humor, right, right, And yeah, I don't remember you said I said, I was right.

It just it just.

This guy is a psycho. It's like the one copy. I feel like every almost everything else, Like even if you're like, oh, you meet someone.

I think fundamental values have to be like what do you mean the same? Like you have to have the same relative fundamental I think a lot of that believe the same. I think that stuff can be I think that stuff can be compromising. People give me reason and that stuff. I just feel like the humor. I guess that's kind of the same thing that's happened with Lily. So maybe I'm kind of a female argument that she didn't start out particularly that way and then she kind of.

Grew to like your dark skill he does beat her.

There is that you kind of forced her into it, right whatever, that's right.

So yeah, I'm.

Just gonna have you sniped.

I will edit that out. I will edit out that.

You can't let anybody know that.

He visus girl daddy beats his girlfriend the absolutely Jamie, thank you.

Uh did she have.

Any did she have any darkness in her or did you completely introduce they had people?

No one, no one. People don't find that shit funny. They're not going to find that funny. You have to be able to laugh at freaking horrible ship.

Okay, so she just like she doesn't Okay, Okay, No, she's not a.

Person I would really talk about stuff like that, but she might see something like that and give a snicker. But insane. But what happens when I told her, when I told her the most comedic versions of people fucking perishing? Yeah, she also doesn't watch people die. That's when she's like, I don't like this, and she like walks off, and I'm like, literally, look at this guy fly off his motorcycle into a into a ceiling fan and he's like,

There is a magic to it of just like how is it doing that?

Where did that come from? That's great to me, Like I said, like, that's obviously I'm being you know, I'm generalizing quite a bit, but I really do feel like safe you must build a foundation on something.

It's got to be that.

It's it's the one thing.

And I remember if somebody was even asked me for advice or ask me for dating advice about like I was saying, even if you're yourself, aren't funny, Like you're not a fucking comedian.

I'm like, well, just watch media.

That's funny that y'all could bond over, right, Like let the let the art do the work for you. Instead of you being like, oh, I'm a funny guy and like, oh you're so funny, I want to fuck you. Just be like, oh, let's I'm gonna pull up a Seinfeld and and uh Stephen Crowder and yeah, damn it, I could.

I didn't want. I wanted to stay.

Uh Seinfield Stephen Crowder And that's the Delie Peterson.

How I spend my entire day just watching Peterson?

No, No, I watched Seinfeld TV and then I have my iPad playing Stephen K. Crowder stand up? Yeah, stand His stand up is dude, you guys have not lived to you've seen Dave Ruben's stand up. This is an iconic for performer. And I gotta tell you, man, I think he's going places. Did you see Lauren No, sorry, yeah, Lauren Shinn's stand up? Did you see it?

What?

No? What do you mean? So there's why would she do that?

So I don't know the context.

All I know is she funny? I don't remember her being funny.

I can't believe you were even asking that questions. No, like I would, I would have see I would have led with that that like, do you know who's surprisingly funny? Because like, no, no, no, it's it's it's it's it's Dave Ruben levels, but worse because it's a woman. I wasn't gonna outright say it, but do you.

Guys really think women are less funny? Not specific funny.

I know funny women. I think I think women have to be less funny. I don't think women. I don't think men have women. I think it's that's funny. Christoph Hitchin said it already.

I'm saying that.

There's like a like men have to be funny more than women have.

It's more of that.

I think. I think female comedians are less funny than male comedians. But I think generally I've met more funny women, like normal than funny guys.

I hate to say this, I feel like a jerk. I have not met many. I've met like genuine, like maybe six hilarious women that like they've made me laugh to like cry.

And I know I know point and I know too many. I think I probably I.

Know more men and women I think I have obviously probably Yeah, but I've met like a ton of funny fucking men, like a ton of men that have made me almost throw up.

I think it might be for.

The same for the same reason though it's but we're also just the same.

So so I think, yeah, that's true.

We're just gonna laugh at the same stuff.

So interesting enough.

One thing that I noticed for sure, just from observation of even in the dating field, the funniest girls that I dated were fat at a point, like at a point, at a point they they had to turn on their personality because they were all fat and to not be completely ridiculed and made fun of their personality skyrocketed past like so many women. So there's a couple of goes that I dated.

If you're fat and worthless, it's gonna make your it's gonna make you Very's.

Someone who I didn't date. You remember Casara? You remember Casar? Yeah, I didn't dated, but we were we partnered for a while. Fat it's good, that's good. And a twig well, she was completely in shape by that point.

But you know, I guess feel like shooting you.

But she had. Does that mean I will say your BMI is none.

I'm not like a Auschwitz.

Child if you go on if you go on one like solid dietary week, you would be I don't think.

So I've got muscle if you.

Went on water, yea, like everything has muscle, but.

Like you know, oh yeah, Cooney has muscle.

She technically does haules. I mean she has like like what is that ship called like breshudo, you know, like she's dude, like that level of muscle.

It's like it's there. Yeah, I'm still around.

I imagine she's around, but like I'm sure she just catering to her niche audience and that's it.

I imagine pray for her.

Yeah, there's a Russian drummer that looks like her, not as skinny, but it's on the verge that it grosses me out. Like she's a really good drummer too, but when I see her, she looks like Miranda Costgrove her face but sunk it in and she's just a fucking amazing drummer. And I'm like, oh my god, she's she's she's working her way, and I was like this like grosses me out.

I actually had I had an unfollower, Miranda Cosgrove.

Miranda Krosky carros Grovoski cro cost Grove, cost Costco cost cross v.

Who's that?

So I'm just she's Russian to this chick I'm talking about that looks like Miranda costgro.

Miranda. There's so much misunderstanding anyway, I don't even know how he got here.

But yeah, yeah, ye know they say like fat chicks, uh they gotta be they gotta put they gotta turn it on, and they're funny like uh, I remember my ruegian X.

I guess she was like fatish it when she was a kid too.

It's funny, funny, hilarious actually, Like there's things that I'm like, oh, that's that's actually a really good joke, Like what you should do? You should probably think about getting in that field, do I do?

I know? I know more funny women?

Well when and women also just have different sences of My wife's pretty funny too, I think, yeah, of course, like women are like you know, it's like the whole like women go into these fields like yeah, because socially they're kind of geared towards doing that. Like it's not because they just they're just incapable of understanding going in

You know, the fuck is a monster truck? The fuck is a fuck.

It's just like a regular truck and you just put a monster in.

Yeah, it was like a scary truck. Yeah, okay, Yeah, they're bigger.

And more monsters. No, like like you know the bombs snowman in the truck.

A bother snowman in truck in former inside of a truck. You ever, you never got on one of those truck derby things where there's monsters in the trucks.

You've never seen that before? Wolf and like the Mega Jew What you said, No, what is that you never heard of?

The classic universal monsters is the Invisible Man, the Wolfman, the Mega Jew, right, the Mega Jew, Right, he's like one Jesus that you know. What's crazy about that is that that seems like something that that could have been true at a certain.

Dude like take it got cut off the draft.

Yeah, and then you made no Wolfman, the Invisible Man, Mega Jew, Frankenstein, and then these all got ported later and then they were analyzing like what to bring forward, and they were like, we should probably leave megage behind.

That's what we can't bring by it. Fucking Walt Disney made that one.

So which one?

So, guys, I know it's a hard call, but which one are we gonna leave behind?

And it's a it's a it's a closi.

It's close.

It's forty nine, forty nine. One guy last well and he's.

Like, which, what what's the time between? It's between Mega Jew and.

Who Mega Jew?

And clearly of Dracula, they would leave behind Dracula.

They're like, regular is kind of cool.

I feel that it would be the Invisible Man. I feel like the Invisible Man is on the cutting room floor.

That's a good point.

Man is so much scarier than most of the all the ones though.

As a concept, but as an actual monster to say, he's just a freak guy.

I can't see who because if it's because the wolf Man is not a were wolf, he's a wolf man. So he looks unbelievably stupid.

I mean, wolf man, I don't.

I won't any fucking with the wolf man, dude, But like he just looks he looks like a bald muscular guy with some like a balding muscular man.

Isn't that scary?

A werewolf is obviously terrified but kind of cool.

But I feel like.

I would be frozen the wolf thing.

I think.

I think it's just it's like the uncanny. It just really that's just gonna make me.

Look it looks more gross to me, the idea of like I don't want that thing because my brain imagines a werewolf cool. You know, I can't imagine it's like probably a werewolf. It's probably so horrifying.

I was just imagining it as a digi mind or something.

Yeah, like frames of reference though, you know, like a frames reference all. Like I've only seen where it was in like fucking underworld. They look kind of cool there, and like in video.

Games, in real life, it's probably under mortifying looking. It's like.

A wolf ape that's probably terrifying. Vampire that is, like this is some fucking skinny guy. I might funk on a bender.

Yeah, yeah, vampires are hot, dude, yeah.

I would suck a vampire on purpose, But fucking was that Kate Beckett to Who's the Bitch that was in a dude?

And uh?

Underworld All Star run Bro?

You never watch? Yeah, of course, what I say? What do I think?

Just watching Spider Man three for the some time, trying to climb on the wall.

Underworld's fun, this morning? Underworld's fun. Actually, I feel like we should watch.

Those movies Mannld especially Underworld.

Two evolution is Actually there's this guy that's in it that clearly I feel like, Oh, get a good looking version of the Creed singer. Yeah, and that's the actor plays Michael. Yeah. Yeah, he just looks like he just was like, what the is this? He has the hair and he's like this kid And I was like, yeah, I've only seen he.

Just dies in the third one. It makes me they make the most. Yes, they're not gonna watch it. You're not gonna you're gonna turn on. It's gonna be like, well how this turn the Spider Man two again?

Is uh?

Is it?

Who? Uh? The the main that that chick's dad isn't he in Game of Thrones? Or I think?

Am I tripping?

I can't remember talking about I've never seen either.

Wait you haven't that is interesting.

I don't think so, that might be interesting. She's a British actor.

That guy fuck Britch actors, an't there?

Yeah?

Oh no, it's it Harry Potter that had that role. I think Harry Potter had the role.

They didn't want to.

A lot of wop Harry Potter are in Game of Thrones.

Right, But I'm saying like there was there was no like stepfast rule about Game of Thrones where like you couldn't hire Americans.

The only actor I know that's American, it's Peter Dinklage Game of Thrones.

Actually, that's so crazy to me when I when yeah he was he's such a Condisden British exactly.

I figured he was British because he was a little person.

Yeah, it seems like I just want to hear his his accent in Game of Thrones. It was so convincing that it wasn't even like it feels effortless. It feels more really some of the other people that are British his accent.

He had a little person accent and nailed it.

Yeah, that's it because the thing about like John Snow, like John actually has that bit of Scottish accent like he does sound.

Like it's from like the north. Yeah, and it's.

Like, but Peter sounds better than you, like this voice, Like what's going He's also like an actor actor exactly.

He's like like he's.

Taking some crazy ass roles, but he's a good actor. Man. Well Peter did.

Yeah, he's made some stupid fu but here's the thing that he.

Has some great ones too though, of course, But is it is it cheating? What?

Because what do you mean?

Because like, let's say you're you're studying to be a good actor, right, yeah, that's going to take you. Let's say that it takes you like a year to get uh into a role or something. For Peter Diglas, because there's less of him, he takes less time. It would take less time.

Because his depiction of time is.

Filling up like.

A smaller like a half gallon tank. It's easier to fill up than a gallon exactly. That is the crazy.

That is the that is that is Maga Tar Devils. I think I think that makes perfect sense.

I think I'm onto something.

I think I just figures. I know they didn't want me to if I cut off half my wife's body took me better at cook it typeh.

That's crazy, alright, Gargo Doggo rode its iss Hello father figures. I really, I really enjoy it when you all talk about dragon Ball, especially the video games. I got a simple question, very simple, what are your top dragon Ball games?

And why this is easily boudakai for me?

Like, I don't think that anything even comes fucking close.

My Kai three, bud Kai two ten Kaichi two, Sorry, Boudakai three ten Kaiichi two, it's parking.

Zero z is great though coming zero those are probably the best one. I mean, there, I feel like there is a there's a right answer to this. I don't think there's really much room for like opinion really because like no one's gonna be like, you know what, I really loved dragon Ball GT. Final Bout or fucking Raging Blast or yeah, ragiela m in.

Operation twenty twenty one something.

Like that, oh, Ultimate Battle twenty two, and.

Then it just like it turns to twenty three, right if you do no, no, you do like this twenty one.

There's a special code where it goes uh it's Ultimate Battle twenty two, and then it becomes Ultimate Battle twenty twenty eight or twenty seven, because there's like five extra characters. Uh side note.

I just wanted to because this was all right, you moving on. I thought you were gonna I I was hoping you're gonna hit the black screen. The dad from uh oh my god, Vampire mo. We were literally talking about Underworld, Underworld, Holy Ship. That's crazy. He was the dad in. He was the step dad in Uh oh my god, no, no, no, the zombie, the British furious. No, the day that made me so mad. Oh my god, dude.

My brainscause I'm not remembering it.

You guys do that so often. Co ops my mind. We literally just saw he played a clip of that.

He said, douchebag it right.

Yeah, he just played a clip of that before you came doing that again.

What was it, I don't remember. It was Billybob Thornton, Yeah, yeah, yeah, Thornington.

William just saying everything blood born Thornton, bloodborn Thornton, bloodborn Thornberry.

Is that am I am? I am I stupid? Or is that a thing that happens to people? It happens all because yeah, because that scares me. Just I just got co opted.

Just yeah, yeah, because you're immediately thinking of that name, and then it pushes it completely. It pushes now, it pushes the right word out as it's about to hit the forefight.

It's like boot.

It's like a black Hawk hitting a plane.

Yeah twice.

No, I didn't happen twice. You sure no to black hawks. I'm one hundred percent sure. I don't know.

Yeah, I'm one hundred percent sure. I'm not one hundred percent sure.

Uh. The Zelda of Legends, Kings of the tearedom that was just wrote in. He says, My conservative friend said Trump solved the federal censorship. I asked how, and they said, Trump signed an executive order putting it into federal censorship. So I asked, but what does the order actually do though, And they just repeated it puts an end dividen's federal censorship.

My question is do you know people this dumb and is there any way of reasoning with them?

No?

No, I don't really know anyone's that dumb. I don't personal interactions.

I don't know anyone in person.

But I'm not very close with them anymore. I was close with their brother.

Lily's not that so Lily I would put it.

As Lily's pretty ignorant because she's a California and I grew up in like a pretty decent like life. She's on the level i've seen her. She's not stupid.

I've seen her like retweet and post many of things that I've.

Seen her put, even to boil in the microwave though. Also so yeah, there is that.

No, No, I think I think she's academically very intelligent.

That she is. She's very but she's also not.

Like she can't wrestle cocaine off of a little person.

She like, how do I explain it? She doesn't. She doesn't have that like some people have the natural yearn to like if they hear about things or like if there's something like going on, they have like year like this out. Yeah, she doesn't have that exactly. But her thing is that she will if she finds, you know, about something, she'll go what she learned about that, which is better than the vast majority of people. Because I'm not even exactly like that. Yeah, I understand what you're

People there's she's not exactly why Well it's like it's it's well, why is this just really just written information just retained over the years, Right, you just have like like experience and wisdom is like a kin. I just feel like it's a thing where people just don't want to exercise their critical thinking skills. Like they hear something and then they just kind of like and then that it doesn't go any further than that.

Yeah, some people, Like some people are like I think I'm a kind of person where I hear something that's like interesting sounding, I'm like, oh, that's sparks, and I want to look that up. I want to figure it out. Some people are just not like that. She when she figures out that there's something going on that she's ill informed about, she will look into it to become informed.

Yeah, I've watched her to do the exact opposite. Yeah, how so I've watched her.

I've watched I've watched her actively lose information.

That's impressive.

It's crazy, that's wild.

Hell yeah, dude, I don't want to know this.

I know one person, a guy that I grew up with. I saw him like a couple of months ago when I went to my hometown and u jojo like she she was.

It was hilarious of her witnessing.

In real time of someone who is just like a low information voter essentially. Now, my friend is is he has a green card, he hasn't naturalized, so I think he just he's just lazy.

He doesn't want to.

But he told me he was like if a guy immigrant from Mexico, And he told me he's like, yeah, you know, if I was a citizen, I definitely would have voted for Trump. And like it's crazy because he's like my my friend, and I've known him since I was like thirteen, and a lot of the stuff that he was saying is so like I didn't ask him who he watches, but it's one of those things that's like I can I could guess I have an ID.

It'd be very easy to guess, like what his reach, if he has a Twitter, what is who he like?

The people that he retweets, you.

Know who they are exactly immediately, because it's never not those people. It's never the same.

I don't I only know one person that's that that level of stupid. No one guy that's it.

Yeah, exactly, that's my saying the same as that guy.

It's like one of my friends is just but like I think I don't know, I feel like that person is like I hate to say the studients there, they are a kind person, but they are fucking dumb.

They are like a dumb person.

I'm like, oh my god, you shouldn't be able to vote, like actually you are.

You are.

It's dangerous to give you authority over anything. And you're just gonna raise a recard as well too. You know, it's scary.

It's hard dealing with like nice dumb, nice people because you don't want to be mean to them, you know, Yeah, you don't want to tell them anything. You don't want to Like that guy that the person that asked the question, I imagine they're like they're homies and so he's kind of trying to pick hum maybe put a kernel instead of just being like Biden's federal censorship, Like what the fuck does That's nothing?

You read like you know, like you wanna.

Yeah, you want it hard to engage?

Yeah, like you how could you be?

That's what is that?

That's so stupid?

Like just hearing that my head, I'm.

Trying to figure out what it's sentially on a federal level, like what are they not? Are they not allowed to say?

What?

There was?

He took the.

First Amendment, and you just shadow he got the original. He found the original copy and started shipping all over and he was like, who did this?

He just like it's hard lines his own ship.

That's cruzy, that's that's next level.

I just kind of uh, and look, I understand that it's smug liberal behavior. I get it, right, But at the same time, I really feel it where it's you just have to you have to treat it like it's I don't know, like it's like it's a cat that jumps up on the fucking wall in it and knocks over something, and it's like it doesn't really understand. Like I understand that it sounds smug, and it's like, oh, you're not doing any favors for your side by being that smug about it. But it's like, I mean, I'm

You know, well, the thing is that the dog could have uses. You know, you could train a dog to be useful.

Well, those people are used a degree ofhip the dog population.

If the dog, if the dog gets me tickets to like a like a crazy show, I'll go. You know, you know, I'll go to the show.

The dumb people are extremely useful to uh, the people that are in charge right now, that's the thing. So like they are very useful. I just feel like those people. It's kind of like, you know how people we have like ages were our bones like kind of sealless in and we've grown as much as we can grow.

Like I feel like with intelligence.

You should really understand that people talk about like say the early twenties.

I mean, I feel like that's everybody, though.

It happened to him sooner.

Probably it's just like you didn't we did, we didn't.

Yeah, I mean myself, I was not blessed with a growth spurt like so on my home.

You didn't go through your whole like no.

I stopped growing when I was sixteen, damn.

Yeah. I was just like, I wonder if I would have grown more if, like I didn't have multiple injuries in football. Yeah, particularly in your back as I'm as I'm talking right now.

My yeah, yeah for football that's.

Just played football one time crumpled and he was like, thanks, guys, much appreciated. You got a cordion like in a fucking cartoon.

You're just like, you.

Know, the snakes from I'm pretty that can lengthen themselves. Yeah, I wish I could do that.

I'd be long and I'm pretty tall considering.

What I had to work with.

To be honest with you, that's true. I feel pretty alright about it.

That's true.

Are you referring to your penis?

No, I mean literally, like my mom's like four nine or something.

Oh my grandma, My grandma is so short, it's crazy. I remember when I went back to New York and I saw her and I was like, what the fuck, dude.

You're mad tiny? And I was like, oh, I forgot you know one of them.

You had no chance. Your dad's like what eight eight eight seven?

No, my mom's actually mad tall. My mom was like five ten, five to ten, almost.

Eleven was.

Or they just been to chopped her legs off.

She's not around when she.

Was alive, they chopp her legs off, and then she wasn't mean.

Your mom's not around, Okay, never mind.

And then my dad's like six seven, so like he's fucking huge. That six seven, that's huge. Yeah.

Yeah, my mom's mad because you're fucking sure. I'm short, heard to him. Yeah, it's insane. I'm one and shorter than my dad.

I guess you're like Lebron James's son, because like he's fucking like six we Lebron James, like six eight er son is his son's like six to two James. Yeah.

The son weird is that he was he was growing a lot. Then he kind of just stopped and I was like, this is weird. Bronni listen, listen.

His name is Bronni Yeah, Bronnie James Junior. He's he's Lebron Yeah, Ronnie.

Yeah, he's not.

Yeah, he's not greatly, especially when you're six too and not built like Lebron James.

He's Lebron James twig. Yeah.

Lebron James is like fucking freak.

If I had a dad who was famous for something, I would never go do that thing.

He's not even bad at basketball, but he is not he is. He's collegiate level at best. He's so far from being a Lebron James. That's the whole that's the problem. And young Lebron he's only in the NBA right now because it's Lebron. Bron the son is obviously potential.

He has potential to get like decent, but he's not gonna be a fucking All Star. No way, He's not gonna be an All Star. And it's really unfortunate because of the fact that he didn't get there. He's talented, he's talented. If he would have went to college and like probably fundamentally changed his game, maybe grew a little maybe grew a little bit, he could have really like done something.

But it's like coming to a game name, let's suck, let's throat. Yeah, let's just throw like got.

Strogu throw his fucking awesome While.

I hope, I hope he don't have.

Any problem with him.

I hope he like really like improved his game because he's I.

Mean, he's like, I gotta you know, I I I'm rather back for Lakers.

So he's only eighteen seventeen actually seventeen. No, no, no, no, he went to college.

You sure he went to college.

You can't do that?

No more.

Yeah, I forgot.

Yeah.

And he also he was not good enough to skip anyway. They'd be like, nigga, no, we don't want you, like right now he should. He's the d.

There's no he went. He's back on the Lakers right now. He's back.

He played a little bit last night.

I think did he do anything?

I don't remember last the other night he did, oh, really did some work. Yeah.

So people were cheering from wherever the fuck they played last night. They were so.

I mean, he's people are excited, but I don't know the fun about it. Nigga, look dungeons on Lakers now, little Vinnie and motherfucker shot shout shouted Barbara. Man shouted Barbara, Dude, they got they got some good people over there.

I mean they have one. They have one that's here.

Oh yeah, yeah, they got Barber, shouted Barbara. Luca and not uh Ivanka the I guess.

The wait wait, Barbara, the person.

Is?

You thought Barbara the place like Santa Barb.

I was like, what's going on? I'm tired.

I've never I've never said that. Do people call it that?

No, to be if anything, Santa Barbara, I don't call it that. But then I was ordering, like do people call it that?

I was like, I was trying to shout out some wondering had him wondering, wonder.

There's three villas only Sylvinian person I've ever met.

Yeah, I met Barbara, isn't Jo best friends with Luke and Chic and I have Millennia's number, So but yeah, but I think those are only three young Millennia was very easy.

Kevin Newsome definitely does.

Yeah, she was.

She was staring. She was staring. It's weird, she was staring. It was like before I forgot go over to Patreon Concess Snart tank, you can ask your questions. He's gone, hold on, this is actually because I never mentioned that that's where you can go ask questions.

Five dollars cheer, right, I don't know, yeah, five dollars cheer.

Don't say I don't know. One of the tears like reis five dollars, Yeah, I get what a dude whatever, go on over to the patio. I started, ask a question.

You sick. I love having love having a podcast with former president Joe Biden.

They want to put him in.

It's just constantly be a free welcome, Like what was it like to be a president? Welcome is coherent, Tim Walls.

And just like I like him, stop making.

Fun I like him too. We can make we can make fun of people.

I can't hit people.

I like. I like him that I love. I think that He tweeted like you unless he's a terrible president. Yeah, it's like like like a million likes or whatever. The dude and then responded it's like remember your name and it's like, yes, it's literally right.

It doesn't work on Twitter.

You get reading.

He's stupid.

You cut what the this guy?

Did you see amazing? Did you amazing?

Did you see a Crowder get blasted when he when he quotes tweeted that, Oh no it isn't. So right wing quote quote cope, right wing cote blast him. So Crowder quote sweet, who are you to that? And then right wing quote cope put someone who notably has not beaten his wife, unlike Stephen Crowder and look at the ratio.

Oh shit, damn, that's a that's a decisive victory for not Stephen Crowder.

Yeah, dude, he got fucking toasted. Stephen Crowd got three thousand likes on the who Are You? And then right wing quote got fifteen thousand. That is a slaughter.

Want fling him into the sun.

It would be I feel like he's one of the few, like so Matt Walsh more Matt Walsh, but like there's certain there's only a handful of people in this world.

When I openly attack them, you know, someone should tell Steven Crowder that random Twitter users are not his wife and he can't hope to beat them.

Yeah.

Yeah, I would openly attack them.

Failed yet bro, people like him exist like dog.

It's okay, it would be nice.

Whatever, Where's God when you need them? Someone just golfed on his head to be great? Someone off on his skull. Happy Gilmore two is coming out. You're serious?

That really serious? Serious? Wait? What do you mean?

What do why?

I mean? I mean it shouldn't be never mind, I don't mean that question. It's called did you ever what my happiest Gilmar? Have seen Heavy Gilmore? Of course not heavy? Watch it. It's good. What is it about? It's this guy.

It's about a hockey player that ended up a sports movie.

Great, he fucks I haven't seen Rocky because it's a sports movie.

He fights, yeah, technically, yeah, yeah, it's a uh.

He fights Bob Barker.

I've only ever seen Spider Man Shrek, and it's a.

Mad, mad, mad mad world. M hm Inherit the Wind. It's either from the sixties or spider Man. That's awful.

You are your perception of like film media must be horror rent. I would love to see you make a film.

I think it will be an interesting one.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's the word.

That's the word.

It'll be interesting, for sure, it'll it'll be now I've seen, Oh, I don't remember it, so, to be honest with you, I saw it like fucking ages ago, and that bleeds like a lot of his movies kind of bleed together for me, Like, to be honest, I mean they have the exact same comedy. Yeah, Like he plays different characters, but they're the same character in all all those parts.

His best movie, I think is Big Daddy. It's his most grounded one of the nineties. Sure, I love that movie.

In the nineties he is clearly Click Click is also.

A good movie.

Actually, I really like Click.

I can't finish that movie without masturbating.

To which part.

Just the remote looks really curving?

Cool?

Remote?

Fucking choking it? Dude, You ever like trying to fight your wrection? You ever like hold your dick while it's soft as hard as you can and then get a bowl room.

Like try to fight.

That's like one of those chamber things.

Yeah, it's like a chastity thing.

For your dick.

I don't that looks really uncomfortable?

I don't. I think that the idea of the why would you want that?

Is my question.

Accept accepting that, Like your girls like put this ring on? It's like, what the kind of person that would put that on? Is such a fucking what don't I would put on the chastity ring?

Bell? Bell?

I would talk about a conquering you're thinking about.

I mean if there was if I ran into a girl with a chastity belt. Ill, Yeah, like what what? This is a useless thing? This thing is You want me to not become Hord? Why should I not become Hord?

You can't control me?

I can't control me. Yeah, Yeah, I don't know. That's weird.

It's an experience and I'm like the worst.

It's like, no, just I would my dick wouldn't fit in one of those because for like the tiniest of pepies.

Yeah, I guess so, yeah, I don't what are they called the dick cage? What do you call it?

If I put a dick.

Cage on Amazon?

Prison?

I think it's just some old person's name prison prison.

All right, let's see one thousand hornets, right, and it says dear snart tank operators. You're going on a cross country road trip with three other people. You pick one, you pick on each co host picks one. They're actually called cages, are they seriously?

So? Metal penis cock cage, fixed protection cage, pink with silicone stuff, yeah, silicon yeah, yeah, so chastity cover.

You're called cockage. Look at this thing because it's just the links. Look at this one.

It's like all sensual.

Yeah.

There's sex toys.

It's like lazy. Yeah yeah that's crazy.

Yeah, there's you can buy sex toys on Amazon. Yeah, that's how you get online.

I mean that's where I get like I've gotten like lube and ship yeah orom there.

I'm not really looping it up, you know. Well, it's sometimes you you know, backdoor stuff, you.

Know, I mean every now and again it's like filthy nigga kind of hurt a little bit. I was like, oh my brother, no, all black. I started reading somebody's questions by the last interest, I'm gonna skip you.

Oh my god, what is it not right?

That is so not you know, he says, dear snark tag operators. Yeah, no, I'm gonna give.

You nice all right, Biden, Let's go have like not be the best podcast for real, though.

I would absolutely watched Joe Biden slowly dive dementia on air.

We got to convince him. We gotta write him letters because you know he only reads.

We have to storm his apartment or wherever the hell he lives. Apartment, where does he live? Now?

He has just like a like a one bedroom.

He's a studio. He has a studio, and soho, why can't get me too far away from because if there's if there's multiple rooms, he'll forget where things are. So he has to be in one room that's constantly always around him. He doesn't even have a separate bathroom. No, he's got a fucking hole in the floor. He's got the quarterings drain.

Oh my god, he just.

Sits flush on the drain and ships his hard as he possibly can.

I was watching the quartering, and I was like, that's a good idea. That's a good idea.

Quartering. You're a genius. That's a great idea, Germany, I said, German Hamblee. I said, what a brilliant feller. I shed on the ground. I stomped it down the dreams. Nobody could take that away from me.

Shut the fuck up, please, someone's laughing at their You think Biden's gonna run again, of course?

Like ever, yeah, yeah, Biden will ever ever jog even twenty eight. You think he's just gonna look like a litch.

He's just gonna be like fucking just.

Like, he's gonna look like a wire frame animation of himself. I'm dude, it's he's gonna look like his own nervous system.

He's gonna be.

Like you see the X rays of characters and like random things, and it's the nervous and with eyeballs.

And yeah, yeah, oh my god. Uh no, cheersly, do you think he's gonna run again?

No, No, I think he's I think he's.

I think he's gonna die before this terms over.

You think I think he's dead already. I mean technically yeah, yeah, I feel like we're gonna be surprised. He's gonna fuck us again.

He's like, I'm back to fuck you. He does, he's like he operates, he's fifty years younger, somehow races again.

Oh and he's all he's like, whoa, that'll be crazy. Crime Bill two, Crime Bill two. And we're gonna make super there's no super palastline's gone. We're gonna make super Israel.

We're gonna make super kitchens illegal super Do.

You want to go?

You want soup milk a supercow like we all do, like everybody else. I get my soup from the super cow, just like every one of you. Did you think I'm an average American? Did you say to Reel?

They lift they live Hawaii and then they tilted, so all the Polynesians fall off.

Wise to too is Reel because israel I thought it was gonna be Israel and was Reel.

Well, no, it's it's Reel. It's probably when's Reel gonna.

Reel one, Israel's gone it it will have been post Reel.

Well, it's gonna be to Israel too, is Reel.

That's gonna be and the super israel I just want they wanted, So they're gonna take They're gonna take like land, right, just lift air airlifted with a bunch of helicopters. Two thousand helicopters are gonna pick up Maui. Yeah, they're gonna like airlift. They tilted, make sure the Polynesians fall off, stay with me, and then they just drop it directly on Palestine, right.

And then too is reel.

That would be an extinction event, by the way.

Yeah, they woul under they would understand.

I not doubting that it wouldn't be majorly dist.

To the I think I think they don't understand. Think they would do that, not understanding how problematic exactly.

And it'd be like every sign to like, please don't do that.

There's volcanoes on there.

If you let those volcanoes out, bad things gonna happen.

Imagine they had enough the helicopters they actually lived.

We're going for today, guys island and people are doing it.

Everybody's like yeah, and gods, I're.

Just like it'd be like the end of Missus Stapfire where they left the island, and they left the island at.

The end of missus stuff are Yeah, what are you doing with my island?

Oh, dear, dear, that's an island. We're going to drop it on the Palestinian.

What are you doing here?

Hold on? That's fucking crazy.

Oh man, I actually love this. I love Israel all the way I love Jews.

Three Palestine. I don't know Palestine. They're all evil.

This is it's actually just Robert Williams, no no costume, doing this.

Sitting at the dinner table with his family, the waste of a fucking movie.

To make a sequel to Miss Stuffire and.

Make it fat.

They can't even they can't even act through it. They're just like, what the fuck is this?

Dude?

Did you say a sequel to Miss Doubt fire like they dig up his bones?

Did think he's a skeleton? Now?

Yes?

I imagine he would have to be. How long? Yes?

How long does it take to in skeleton?

Probably like less than a year or two? Actually way probably.

It will take like fucking fifteen years.

With fifteen years, yeah, because you're covering like formalda, if you're embalmed. I wonder how long it does take. I literally have no id.

Look up how long to in skeleton?

Yeah?

How long to in skeleton Robin Williams.

Specific specifically, how long? I want to know his specific to look it.

Up and see what fucking googles?

Yeah, ask chat GPT.

Wait where's my phone?

I do have chat GVT on my phone.

Let me see.

Range rage range from weeks to a decade, depending on many factors. Massive amount of time that's way because of death and where that the body is buried.

I guess Oh that's too vague.

I want that very specific question asked.

All right, hello, chatch ebt how long does it take? How long would it take? Hold on, ignore what I just said? How long would it take for Robin Williams to become a skeleton? You're dumb and gay. If Robin Williams was buried in a typical casket, it could take decades for his body to fully decompose it to a skeleton. Wow, depending on the factors like moisture, temperature and soil composition. If he were in a more exposed environment or a

However, if he was cremated, there wouldn't be a skeleton.

Left at all.

It covered fucking everything.

Hey man, tagbt is useful for my stupid, fucking questions.

I never used it. I think that just kind of sold me. I mean, I've already seen great examples.

Well, the thing is, tragbt is what Siri pretends to be.

Yeah, you know what I mean.

It's worth it from that perspective, but like, I don't know, outside of that, I don't really find.

It is that like a specific app or it just it's literally just I mean just you just go like it's a tragt app but like see anyway, interesting anyway, So one thousand hornets, Sorry, we can get to your question. You said that so stupid and answered it perfectly, if you know what I mean, the tragy your question.

I know, yeah, I don't know, I know, I stuttered, I interrupted myself. I said forget everything, and it understood what I was saying.

I want you to type that question, copy and pastient into Google.

Oh my god, it's a great idea. That is such.

That is a fantastic idea. I have a feeling how long does it take it?

Rats that rod? Because how long does it take how long would it take? Hold on ignore? Alright, let me see paste.

This ain't no result.

The first result is Spark of Rebellion, a Star Wars podcast.

U K.

Then it's House of Fincher. Then it's books.

People think they know why nine year olds stop reading for fun? Brother, Google is.

Cooked.

There's nothing that has to do with literally.

Robin Williams is the fourth result, and it's just his wiki. It's just fiery. It's literally just fucking up.

It's just a bunch of podcast pot the Podcast on Haunted Hill Episode one. Uh are you worried about AI replacing you? Jeff Seibert says, the Watson wire archives, human robot interactions, stem resources in the library, print books.

It's just taking a shot in the dark, not even giving you just exclusively. I would at least accept exclusively Robin Williams stuff.

Yeah, here's the.

One notable thing in that tire mess of It's pretty good.

It's it's pretty good for it.

Said nothing about bodies, nothing, no, no, nothing at all.

Like it's that's you're asking, asking and asking a question.

Chat GBT. Why is Chris Maldelotto such a stupid bitch?

Let's see, I'm here for positive and meaningful conversations. If you're frustrated with Chris Baldonado, I'm happy to listen and help you work through it.

What's going on?

That's funny.

I was hoping it'd have some fucking.

Wait, ask a.

Specifically ca confidence question like stutter as much as you possibly can, but end with something.

I was chat GBT, I was wondering, I was I was confused about something and I need I need help. Why why are there so few black people, like like in Star Wars in general, Like where are they at?

And why am I gay?

And why am I gay?

Yeah, that's a good question. Oh whoa, it's a fucking actual whoa. It's keeps writing. It's like giving you detailed The Star Wars universe is massive, with countless plants and species, but when it comes to human characters, especially in the original trilogy, there were very few black actors. Orlando Coyris and blah blah blah. It was pretty much the only major black character in the original films. There are other

Knew their place. I think we're getting a little bit.

This might just be my chat GPT. Yeah, it might be.

It's like it's actually a really long explanation of.

Like all the good thing. It's a good thing really.

So while there are Black Star Wars franchises as oh no, okay, no, I just.

Sorry, I was, I was, I swiped up and then I hit like it's basically what I was trying to reset my screen but it didn't work.

It stayed on here. And then I added one of these things to my cart.

Oh this sex time.

Yeah, I pressed add the cart and I was like, oh no, dude. I have like three hundred dollars of fucking stuff on Amazon. I haven't spent it yet, and I don't know why. I think I'm scared of not having it. I like the cushion of having that much free election on Amazon.

What are you talking about?

Free stuff?

And I have like a bunch of like coupons and stuff like that. Oh really like coupons and like rewards. I just haven't used it and use it.

Using What are you doing? Don't they like expire? I pretty sure they expired. I don't think they do they do.

Rewards always expire.

That's the point. Okay, all right? Whatever one thousand hornets wrote and he says, dear snark at tank operators, you're going across by the way, this guy must have been so frustrated.

I read his name like an hour ago.

Oh c whatever is You're going on across county road cross country? Who was want to say cross county because it's the ma all that I cunt across country road trip with three other people? You pick one each co host pick one. Co host picks one. Who are you taking on this coast to coast adventure? So I guess there's three people. This is a confusing question. I think. So there's three people, but we get to pick who they are. We get one pick each. I guess is how I'm interpreting this what?

So listen to this question again. Yeah, it's a little confusing.

You're going on a cross country road trip.

With three other people, so four people until in total?

Yeah, you pick one and each co host picks one. But that right, so.

Including you and other people?

I I get. So basically the premises you're gonna have one sane person and then two insane other.

People with you. Yeah, I guess gotcha. All right, So Chris, who who you want.

To go in?

Uh?

I'll go on the road trip with Dave Ruben, but I won't be coming back with him.

All right, I'm gonna do for you. I'm gonna choose.

Thank you so much for inviting be. I'm a dumb gay bitch. It's gonna make it for a great ride, show tunes and stand up comedy.

Oh god, I'm also gay?

Just did I? Did I mention you that I have a gay husband. I can't, David, I can't help. But they're notice there are men in the audience. That's the level of comedy that he goes like. It's it's literally him making an observation and then forgetting that he made it. What did I say again? What did I say again?

I'm too gay to remember.

I'm just thinking about I'm only thinking about penis up here?

Is that love?

Men?

So damn much about wicked, so damn distracted, Wicked to remember my own social security though by deported me back to Gayistan and whatever the bab.

Gays. I'm from penn Island, U, so uh what I penn Island. That's amazing, that's awesome.

W me from pen Island. That makes perfect sense.

I would choose for you, I would choose, uh, who would annoy you really badly?

I would choose a hurry, we don't have much time. The emotion is rising, the emotion is rise.

Probably choose Drake.

Drake.

Yeah, oh my god, id media best? I would Uh. I would choose who is the most annoying person on this planet? Oh?

I got another one, but I remember. I think I would choose I think I would choose.

Which one is it?

Fit?

Fit people?

Yeah? The fit guy? Which one is that? Myron?

Myron?

Yeah? I wouldose Myron because I feel like he would not shut the fuck up the entire time. I would choose fit. I wouldose Fresh. So you get to become racist.

You're just gonna keep calling him horrible. Look at it and be like, you do look like an ape like you you do look like crazy, You do look like we explain this, Explain this man, Christians, explain this. He looks like he looks like Kertschak. I swear to god, he looks like Kurtchak. This child would just be a gorilla.

Oh my god, what relax?

Oh no, they might have damn it. They might have caught up.

They might have caught well, not sat worse than that, because I was looking up. We were talking about helicopters and somebody said like black, so I put in black cock down because I was like, it has to be real, right, it has black cock, dad has to be real. And this the corner of my phone might have caught some screenshot, probably cocked down.

Probably I'm not gonna remember this, leave it whatever, All right, let's see what time we're making.

Good time, Let's do one more.

Yeah, uh, Chris, oh, we didn't even we didn't even finish this question, and telling me he doesn't like, like, are you telling me? Like a fucking gorilla from a fucking He looks like the gorilla that was friends with my help the judges that the guy who was friends with Joe.

Shut the fuck up, dude, the Jungle's friend looking as which one? Which one?

Which one?

They're all the same to me.

The the one that looks more ape like.

So, go closer, I can't see.

That's just a black person. I was like, no, it's not a gorilla.

He looks like an ape bro. I'm sorry, I hate to say it isn't. Uh did you see that they put uh Freshen in a video game.

Game.

You didn't see this?

They added him game?

Is it? Is it?

The subway?

Is the Ozaru Vegeta is a subway game where you get to eat him? Yeah?

No, no, I just remember like the announcement, everyone's like, oh ship, like they they they put uh, they put him in the game.

Like, oh, it's Winston.

Yeah, I didn't know that was just that was his real name on accounting. He's a gorilla.

Yeah, isn't that guy's name actually something with the W.

I swear to god, it's windows.

He's some sort of African ass.

Yeah, it's Winchester Winch.

Like his name is Gore.

We did a little question that I think we answered your It was no. I think the idea just for you, I know. So it says, dear startank operators, you're you're going on a cross country road trip with three other people. You pick one, and each co host picked one. So I think we're doing the road trip and we're going with three other people and we each pick one of the three people.

Is what Walter?

So we have Dave Rubin fit and uh and what did you say?

Understood? Okay? Okay?

I misunderstaid. I was thinking it was like everybody. It was worded a little weird arrow. Okay, I get it, I get it, I get it.

I only just understood it. In fact, Damn I feel retarded. Yeah, I mean, you know, I am so, I'm not ashamed of it. What the fuck is this? My name is Gore Illo? Oh no, great four or five? Wrote in He says, salutations, boyos. What is it? Grape four five?

Great? Four five?

Great?

Yeah? Okay wo uh. He says, salutations, boyos. Have you all ever caught up with any of the weird kids from your childhood? There was a kid from my neighborhood who would have lightsaber battles in the street, and then years later I found him in a into cancer predator. That's fucking awesome. You all actually talked about him in an episode ages ago. That's fucking funny. I mean, don't I would.

I would love to recall it grade four to five.

Keep your name so I can remember who this is. Yeah, but I need to follow up on this, yeah, stat commented on the episode. Uh, on the episode, like proper absolutely, because I want to see I want to know what the who I need to know?

Yeah, that's fascinating.

That's cool to know.

Like, when I think about that a lot, I wonder like, well, most of the people that I had a problem with in high school are dead now because they're that's pretty nuts.

That is true though, actually had full of the the yeah problem they fell into like meth or something. Yeah, the one got shot in the stomach that I knew, and we're like, yeah, fo them, we're dead. This one guy that was a terrible person.

He yeah.

Actually, it's kind of kind of crazy that a few.

The ones that are so it's like two of them that became better people, they like grew up better people, but then was like a lot of them that were like really bad people end up debt or in jail.

Yeah, the bad ones.

Yeah, the weird ones end up usually normal, Like the ones that I remember, they just turned into like normal they found communities or they're like oh they or they you know, they found community with all the other kind of like geeks and ship and they're just like, yeah, we're harmless.

Yeah, yeah, nothing crazy like that.

I'd love that.

Yeah, I'd love to recognize somebody to capture prettor dude.

That'd be amazing.

I honestly.

That that is my that's like my secret wish every time I watch an episode of that show is that I'll recognize somebody like or like.

Somebody that I've found out about later, like say Ethan Ralph or something got on there. I think I would bust. That would be too much, it would be too entertaining for me.

I would bust.

Yeah. I never I never actively caught up with these people, Like, I've really only kept in touch with people that I liked, you know, or would want to keep in touch with. Like if there was anybody that like gave me like weird vibes, I was just like immediately like avoidant and I had I made no effort to rekindle what little there was anyway.

Yeah, I've uh, like I have people that don't really talk to that often that were Facebook friends. Yeah, and so I don't.

I didn't have Facebook Messenger. It's like, you know, it's a separate app from Facebook. Yeah now it is.

Yeah, it's been like that for a few years now, I guess, yeah, quite a while.

But I I think, like the last five years, I think some like I so.

I downloaded it because I needed to. It was the only way I could listen to this audio. Somebody sent me three minutes of audio as a song, and I could only listen to the messengers. I downloaded it and then out of fucking nowhere. This guy went to high school with first he face times. We had three in the morning or video if you know that through the messengers the fun I'm not answering this obviously, I haven't

I was just like, weird interaction because it's just like, I don't even have a problem with you. It's just like, why I don't I have no desire.

To Why wouldn't you text me for you don't have this relationship. I don't want to see your face.

I don't fucking I don't.

I grew up without I mean you guys did too. Honestly, we grew up without face time. That's a very way to do things, and I don't my my close friends. I don't FaceTime. Though.

We were poor. Actually we had we had to use carrier pigeons, how like in little pieces of paper. Yeah, we wrote little scrolls, but I almost feel like that's expensive to up keep the pigeons.

Noigeons are cheap?

Are they training them and stuff their free range pigeons? Oh okay, my my mistake. Yeah, I didn't know that's how it worked. Yeah, no, it's okay, surprisingly simple to that's cool. So then you got like the you got the little scrolls. Yeah, little tiny scrolls. You had like a little quill. That's that's fucking adorable.

Yeah, you're write a little note.

You would still you would still write as if you were texting on a on a number pad, though you would abbreviate everything. When are you? When are you getting here? Law? That is insane.

I remember what poor pigeons are doing overtime because your dumb mass can't send a full text.

Yeah, you guys trust technology.

That's what I think we should bring that back carrier pigeons. Yeah, I think I think Trump should sign an executive e MP order.

Trump would be my favorite president if he legalizes owning crows. I want to crow real bad.

They're really smart.

They're so smart.

I think you should just have one.

I don't think it's going to stop you.

I think people will stop me.

Who would stop you?

The crow?

I'm done, I'm doing the crow Master, the Crowman, the Crowman, the cro.

Croly. There it is there, it is got it.

Man, you show up with little mini crows like not narc crows, you know, pulls a gun out on you.

Ravens are the gross one, right, Crows are the cool ones. Well, technically it's the opposite. I would imagine they're both awesome. Ravens are bigger and the ones that I think ravens can mimic. You speak pretty well if you're saying, no, no, you're wrong. Crows can mimic you that what you're saying is ravens can't mimic, is what you're saying.

I don't.

I think the crows are the ones that mimic. They're the ones that are like famously intelligent right now, they are famously intelligent, but they can't mimic. Ravens can specifically remick mimic really Okay, Yeah, that's why that's the egg around po poem about the raven that that says, never him speak like.

There's a lot of you know, I mean the fact that.

Plenty of birds I can go, girl, yeah, a lot of birds can do that. I feel like it's I don't know if I don't know if crows can mimic though.

Look at them. I don't know. I think they can. I feel like not as well as the ravens. Ravens are crazy.

I have no idea.

There's probably like some subspecies.

That raven will come to you and say, like, I'm going to steal your tax documents crostic speech, so they both cans. What Oh. I was talking to a crow one time. Oh really. He was like, hey man, you got needles on you?

And I was like he said that the crow yeah, And.

I was like, ship man, I just ate them. He's like and he said, oh, you're fucking useless, and he flew away.

Exactly.

He had a crow do that exact same thing to me.

I saw a crow barter with one of those dudes that have stands in like New York or whatever. Mm hmm, Like like the crow had something and the guy was offering it like food, and the crow was like no, and he pulled like a bigger piece out and he's like all right, cool, and then they like exchanged.

I was like, what the fuck this happened? I saw a crown Washington Square Park.

One's real yeah, like a like a bar.

They actually it's sucking insane. I saw crowing one so bad.

I saw Crown Central Park, peck of guy's ears RUMs out and fly away.

I think the interesting, ever is to have a crow and a wolf and cel it's still not a crow, you fucking fucking six year old? What about a elementary school?

You're like, what about a whoa? Whoa? We gotta get the funk out of here?

Thanks for uh a wolf crow as a wolf? That is so blindingly dumb. Oh my god, dude, holy ship that is Oh my god, that's drip right there.

You can you can breathe again.

It was like, whoa.

That was like a Neti pot for he can breathe again.

And so my friend used one of those ones, like one of the things you put the water water in and it comes out. Dude, the amount of blood that came out of his fucking mouth was disgusting because he must have been congested like fun for a while.

His nose.

What the like? He did the thing?

He was like, what was to happen?

This right? And then he was sneezed. It was like get inky.

I was like, what the fuck are you using blood?

Okay?

Using a black talk so so hold on When you say blood, do you mean guys?

No, it was.

He doesn't know.

It was bright red. I'm pretty sure it's blood, but.

It's this fucking stale green blood that I'm stale green blood.

It was just alien blood your nose.

You should not look. You should not have blood pouring in your nose after an eddy pot. That's not normal, dude, that is that is incredibly abnormal. Actually I have like, so I don't use the nett one because there's not enough pressure. But it was like there's like a squirt you squeeze it. So it's the same concept, gentle squeeze and it clears me out. The netty one doesn't like I'm too backed, and it doesn't like actually work. It's uncomfortable to use.

This sailing thing once and it was fucking horrible.

Instead of using POT, I usually like walk up to a door and bang my head and spang my head on the door.

Up at least at least makes you feel like your sciences are losing.

Yeah, Like I don't feel the pressure I have.

With that mark in a bar.

I can't feel anything. Yeah, I highly do.

I feel like a new person. You ever, there is a perfect representation so Darrek Devil uses the netty pot when he's all fucked up in that one episode, Yeah, and blood comes out of his and I was like, everybody happens everybody.

Friend thought like, oh, I'm like Darvilds.

I'm like years lives. He lives.

He lives a completely docile life. He has no reason to be like, oh, man, Daredevil's going through this, It's normal that I'm going through. It's completely normal. He's never been in a fight, he's never even fallen down. He's got blood pouring out of his nostrils. And maybe that's what we think. Maybe that kid is blind.

He's color blind. Yeah, he just thinks he's bleeding, but he's just fucking snotting and girls.