While there is much talk today about the importance of self esteem and its effect on a person's attitudes and accomplishments, there is a corollary benefit of understanding the greatness of man -- If I am obligated to respect myself because I was created in the image of HASHEM, then so too, I must respect you, because you also were created in that same image. In fact, Ben Azzai teaches us that if a person wants to improve his interpersonal relationships, a concept that will help him even more th...
Mar 09, 2019•55 min
We are creatures of habit -- we act by habit, we react by habit and, to a large extent, we even think by habit. And, in truth, it has to be that way. If we didn't act based on previously established patterns of behavior, life would be unmanageable. If every time we turned a corner we would have to think through the actions involved, our entire mind's focus would be on navigating the basics of living, with no upper brain room left for thinking. For that reason, HASHEM gave us this ability to put ...
Mar 09, 2019•49 min
In 1996 Gordon and Horowitz published a study entitled Will your grandchildren be Jewish? Their conclusion: if one were to view the Jewish Nation as a totality, based on ever decreasing birth rates and skyrocketing intermarriage rates, the odds of any Jews being left by the end of the 21 st century are slim to none. However, one category stands out in stark relief -- the Orthodox. Based on their average birth rate of between 4-6 children per family, and their intermarriage rate of less than 3%, ...
Mar 09, 2019•58 min
Shmuz INfo Coming Soon.... See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information. This podcast has been graciously sponsored by JewishPodcasts.fm. There is much overhead to maintain this service so please help us continue our goal of helping Jewish lecturers become podcasters and support us with a donation: https://thechesedfund.com/jewishpodcasts/donate
Mar 09, 2019•53 min
We know that everything is from HASHEM. We also know that we must do our part-- our Hishtadlus. In theory it is easy to find the balance-- I must act in the way of the world, yet knowing all the while that HASHEM runs everything. One of the great challenges of life is actually personifying that tightrope walk between Bitachon and proper Hishtadlus. How hard should I be working? How seriously should I take the medical reports and new findings? When is it appropriate for me to say, "I have done my...
Mar 09, 2019•44 min
We know that we were put on this planet for a few short years, to shape ourselves into who we will be for eternity. HASHEM has created this world specifically to give us the chance to mold our inner essence. We also know that the Torah and its mitzvahs are the greatest vehicles of self perfection. If so, one of the questions that a thinking person must ask themselves is, why do we need work? HASHEM is quite capable of creating a world where all of man's needs are met. Yet, not only do we labor, ...
Mar 09, 2019•45 min
One of the most difficult character traits to work on is humility. Not only is it considered the most pervasive of the all of the middos, it is the most misunderstood. On one hand, we are obligated to appreciate the greatness of the human, yet on the other, we must remain humble. One technique to help identify the trait and its pathology is to see it in its extreme. Using the story of Megillas Esther as a backdrop, and particularly some of foibles of Haman, we are able to witness arrogance in it...
Mar 09, 2019•54 min
One of the tools of highly successful people is the ability to stay focused and motivated over long periods of time. Whether in sports, academics, or business, the effort and consistency needed to accomplish long term goalsrequires a high level of motivation and the ability to renew excitement and enthusiasm. Often the difference between a person who reaches great heights and a person who doesn't is the persons self awareness and ability to marshal the inner resources to stay on top of the game....
Mar 09, 2019•50 min
If you were to poll our community, the average parent would admit we probably give our children too much. And while this sentiment may not be clearly spoken out by young parents, once children hit the teen age years, most parents upon reflection would say : I wish we had been more firm with them when they were younger; Weve probably spoiled them; They would have been better off, had they not be given quite so much We live in permissive times, and parents seem almost afraid to say the word no to ...
Mar 09, 2019•48 min
Eleanor Roosevelt has been credited with saying, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." The reality is that most of the battles that we fight are based on complex constructions -- created by us. Whether they be issues of misunderstanding other's motives, or our fight with passions and desire, or understanding our place in the universe - our fights and battles are very real to us. Yet, when you try to explain them to others we often find, many people can't even identify with th...
Mar 09, 2019•50 min
There is much truth in the adage: There are three sides to every story, your side, my side and the truth. And, even though I fully understand that you might be making a valid point, as soon as we get into an argument, I can no longer even see your side because, of course, I'm right. Why is that? We all make mistakes. That is part of being human. And while I certainly can accept that you make mistakes, it becomes very difficult to accept that I may be wrong. In theory I accept that as a human I e...
Mar 09, 2019•1 hr 4 min
"Considering where I come from and what I've been through, I'm doing pretty well..." While this may be a comforting position to take, the question a person must ask themselves is: is this really all that I can be? What if I were to stop making excuses? What if I was to truly hold myself accountable to live up to my potential? What if I was to go full blast - how great could I be? This question is essential for growth, but it is also one of our greatest pitfalls. If we don't clearly see how much ...
Mar 09, 2019•57 min
Almost all of the people that we deal with are reasonable, well intentioned individuals. And so too, am I. Yet, in the course of life, there is conflict, hurtful words, vengeful acts And, in that rare moment of self honesty, I realize that everything that happens isn't the "other guys fault". I too, am to blame. There have been situations where I acted in a manner that was cold and callous. There have been times when I acted with cruelty and malice. The question is why? It's not that I am not a ...
Mar 09, 2019•45 min
We know that the Torah is very exacting in regards to Loshon Horah: there are 17 negative and 14 positive commandments concerning disparaging speech. In fact, the Rambam paskens like the Gemara, that the sin of Loshon Horah is worse than the sins of Idol worship; illicit relations, and bloodshed. The question is why? Of all of our activities why does the Torah see fit that this one should be dealt with so severely? What is so egregious, so horrific? After all its only words.. ..This Shmuz deals ...
Mar 09, 2019•52 min
Since the time of Kain and Hevel, it seems a given that brothers fight. Even in the most refined home, where individuals are polite and respectful, siblings take liberties with each other that they wouldn't dare take with outsiders- it is almost as if an unwritten law permits the torture of siblings. What is even more surprising is that individuals we know, good people, who outside the home are so courteous and caring, act very differently when they are amongst their closest family -- What is ev...
Mar 09, 2019•55 min
The Palestinians have aspirations of political freedom as do every people. Their requests are merely of sovereignty and political rights-- and of course, once they have been granted these, they will live in harmony with their neighbors, recognizing Israel's right to peaceful coexistence. Or will they? An opened minded view of the current situation brings grave doubts to the true desires of the Arabs in general and the Palestinians in particular. This Shmuz focuses on some of the underlying cause...
Mar 09, 2019•58 min
Recent studies show that in 2004, there were an estimated 44.5 million adult smokers in the United States, and 70% of them want to quit. Each year, 35% do attempt to stop, yet only 5% succeed -- clearly change isn't easy. Willpower alone isn't enough. A good program for change alone isn't enough. To make change permanent, we need outside help. Support groups are successful for this very reason. Weight Watchers reports that people who attend meetings lose three times as much weight as those who d...
Mar 09, 2019•43 min
There are certain life lessons that they don't teach you in school. One of them is the importance of maintaining a sense of humor. Not only is this one of the key elements for maintaining a sense of balance and joy as we travel through the trials of life, in terms of our relationships with others, a light touch often spells the difference between harmony and strife-love and hate. Focusing on the adage that "He who laughs, lasts.. .." this Shmuz underscores the power of laughter -- a force that i...
Mar 09, 2019•43 min
The Vilna Gaon tells us that the main reason for life is to change our middos -"If not" he says, "Why should a person have life?" The difficulty with this mandate is that it means: I have to change. While in theory I may be open to grow -- I may even recognize the many advantage to my life, in practice we humans find it very difficult to change. Ask a person who has smoked for 20 years, "How easy it is to change?" Ask a person who is 40 lbs overweight, "Don't you want to lose weight?" The realit...
Mar 09, 2019•58 min
When a person recognizes that he needs to lose weight, it isn't enough for him to read all the latest diet books and find a great plan - the person has to actually "do it." He has to go on that diet and stick to it. But "doing it" requires motivation, not just the initial motivation to begin, but long-lasting motivation that will withstand the tests of life, allowing changes in behavior to become permanent. Why is it that some people are able to maintain that positive focus and other aren't? Are...
Mar 09, 2019•52 min
I do daven with a minyan. I don't. I do a chesed -- I don't. Does it really matter? Does it really make a difference? Very often we find ourselves thinking what is the big deal? Will my actions really change my life? Will they change my world? Yet every once in a while, we come across a single action that does change the world-- a shot heard around the world. Our natural assumption is that these types of acts are relegated to singular people, living in highly unusual times and circumstance. Yet,...
Mar 09, 2019•47 min
Hot, hotter, hottest. Fast, faster, fastest. In the English language we distinguish between the adjective, a descriptive word, and the superlative, an adjective taken to its extreme. Yet when we think about wealth, that distinction somehow gets lost. If I am not as rich as Bill Gates, then I am not rich. While the Torah does not guarantee that any individual will be wealthy, it does offer a tried and true formula for a person to enjoy riches in this world. This Shmuz focuses on the concept of we...
Mar 09, 2019•55 min
On 12 April 1961, Soviet cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin became the first man in space. Upon his return, he made the famous statement, I have proven that G-d doesnt exist I was in heaven, and I didn't see any God up there." While we may find his logic simple minded, in reality, he makes a valid point. How can the Torah expect us to believe in something that all of our senses deny? We relate to the world through our five senses, yet none of them can perceive the presence of HASHEM. How can a person be exp...
Mar 09, 2019•50 min
We know that Tshuvah works. The Nivim told us it does, Chazal repeat it many, many times, and we even have Yom Kippur, a day created specifically for tshuvah. The question isn't whether Tshuvah works, but why I don't make use of it? Why is it that I don't stand there on Yom Kippur with tears flowing down my face, repenting, improving, ridding myself of a year's worth of iniquities? It isn't that I don't want to. It isn't even that I don't believe in it. It just seems that I don't feel a need to ...
Mar 09, 2019•52 min
An atheist is someone who doesnt believe in G-d. A religious person is someone who practices a lifestyle that serves G-d. It would therefore seem obvious that being a religious atheist would be a contradiction in terms. Yet not only isnt this correct, the phenomenon of religious atheists is far more prevalent than we realize. This Shmuz focuses us on some of the bedrock foundations of our religion and some of the strange experiences that result from living a life unexamined. See acast.com/privac...
Mar 09, 2019•46 min
All the great leaders and teachers of the Jewish Nation had faults and flaws. The Torah tells us the shortcomings of Avrohom, Dovid, and Shlomo. More amazingly, the Gemarah tells us that the four men who never sinned aren't counted amongst the greatest of our nation. Why? The reason is simple. HASHEM didn't put us on the planet not to sin. HASHEM created us to act - to accomplish, to change ourselves, to change our world. To do this, we need to stand up for what is right, despite the odds, despi...
Mar 09, 2019•48 min
Shmuz Info Coming Soon... See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information. This podcast has been graciously sponsored by JewishPodcasts.fm. There is much overhead to maintain this service so please help us continue our goal of helping Jewish lecturers become podcasters and support us with a donation: https://thechesedfund.com/jewishpodcasts/donate
Mar 09, 2019•45 min
Each one of us stands under the chuppah starry-eyed, knowing full well that we have found eternal love and bliss.Yet, something happens between that moment and real life. The reality is that getting married is easy, but staying married isn't . This Shmuz is Part I of a Marriage series that deals with the essential of creating long lasting Shalom Bayis. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information. This podcast has been graciously sponsored by JewishPodcasts.fm. There is much overhea...
Mar 09, 2019•1 hr 2 min
Sorry, Shmuz info coming soon. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information. This podcast has been graciously sponsored by JewishPodcasts.fm. There is much overhead to maintain this service so please help us continue our goal of helping Jewish lecturers become podcasters and support us with a donation: https://thechesedfund.com/jewishpodcasts/donate
Mar 09, 2019•51 min
Each one of us stands under the chuppah starry-eyed, knowing full well that we have found eternal love and bliss.Yet, something happens between that moment and real life. The reality is that getting married is easy, but staying married isn't . This Shmuz is Part II of a Marriage series that deals with the essential of creating long lasting Shalom Bayis. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information. This podcast has been graciously sponsored by JewishPodcasts.fm. There is much overhe...
Mar 09, 2019•58 min
