Sandy's Latest Perpetual Diary of Disappointments Entry

All right, this is a great question.

Everybody's got something to Even if you're a lazy bum, you probably do something in your life right now so your future me in this case, doesn't suffer a little bit. Again, don't get too hung up on future. Future could be tomorrow right or the next day, or it could be ten years from now. So try to give everyone example of that one you do with the coffee maker.

I do this religiously.

The night before, I fill up the coffee maker and I get everything ready, so all I have to do in the morning is get up, walk to the coffee maker and make my coffee.

If there's no water in it, or.

If I have to go get a new creamer out in the garage because there's not one on the end.

It literally I feel like it ruins my day.

Yeah, but you do it every day.

I do it every single day. It's one of my nighttime chores.

Two things that I do. One, when I get gas, I clean my car out. That's our trash away. When I get gas it's filling up, you might as well fill the time by picking.

Up the trash in your car.

Oh, I feel very attracted to you.

The other thing that I just read I simply started doing, probably in the last month or so. I get my gym bag ready to go before, you know, the night before.

Yeah, that's the equivalent to laying at your clothes for the next morning.

Yeah yeah, yeah.

I get my gym bag ready to go, and I actually fill my water bottle, do all that stuff, so I've got it ready to go for the next day.

Mm hmm.

It just makes easier in the morning, right, you know, the afternoon whenever you're ready to go, You've got your stuff and you're ready.

Right.

One of the things that I do that I don't understand why people make this a two step process when it can clearly be a one step process is if I'm standing at the kitchen sink rinsing off dishes, I then to my left, six inches from where I'm standing, I put the dishes in the dishwasher instead of rinsing the dishes and then sitting them in the left side of the sink and then leaving and going doing something else, so then I have to remember to come back and do it later.

I don't understand that one.

I don't understand. It's literally right there.

Something that I do too. It's good for me. It's good for everybody, but Tricia loves. Every Thursday, I get a chlorox wipe or two and clean the entire commode, the entire thing. Every Thursday. I get a reminder on my phone, uh huh.

And I get it.

I clean it every single Thursday. That's just to avoid any future problem with me. Yes, with you, I guess correct. Uh do you have any more?

I will tell myself all right now, I'm too tired tonight on the way home.

I'll just get gas in the morning on the way to work.

I know I not one time have I actually waited to do that, that it has been okay, and that I have not been late. So I always if I need gas, no matter how tired I am, we'll get it the day before or after work, because I know I'm.

Not going to be able to do it in the morning. And it's always where.

There's nothing more stressful than thinking you're going to run out of gas right, and the zero never means zero.

The near I know I've pushed it to a couple of miles past the zero. I won't do it past.

I mean, I feel like you one time drove around as long as you could on zero gas, just as it was like fifty miles.

Yes, it was like forty two miles. Yeah, last, thank god.

Right, Well, I'm glad they do that though, yes, because if it was really zero mint zero, we had a lot of stranded vehicles, lots, lots and lots and lots, and then you know, you run out of gas. It used to be no one had a gas can to buy. Now every comedian store in the world has one to get one. Used to be more exciting. Couldn't call anybos more on the edge. Yeah, you couldn't call somebody, you know. It's just you were on your own when you ran out of gas. So it's always good to look at it.

Stay with us.

We've got more coming up on Austin's Eighties Station one oh three point one. The trailer for the new Bruce Springsteen bio pic is out. We've got it for you in just a Moment, and the story we Love text Us Anytime seven three seven three zero one ninety six.

His story is welahaw and.

Now Live from the Lesser Whole studio. Here's Christia Delicia.

So Jeremy Allen White is in all his glory as Bruce Springsteen in the first trailer for the movie Deliver Me from Nowhere.

Here's what I want you to understand. This is not about the charts.

This is about Bruce Springsteen, what he's doing with this album.

Jeremy Allen White, everybody knows him from the hit Emmy winning role on The Bear.

That's him singing.

He was also before that and Shameless and he was great.

Uh huh, I mean really though, shot to fame with The Bear. I can't believe that's him singing.

When I first saw the trailer, I was like, how do they dub Bruce Springsteen's voice so well? Jeremy Allen White is doing the singing. It's amazing. It focuses on Springsteen's nineteen eighty two album Nebraska. Yeah, one of the most acclaimed albums of all time, and it looks like it is going to be amazing.

The movie is going to be in theaters October twenty four.

You normally don't like musical biopics, but you recently fell in love with Bruce Springsteen having watched a documentary so Will that get you to the movie theater?

Yes, I watched the documentary about his He's on tour, the tour he was on, they had behind the scenes documentary filmed called road Something, Road Stories something like that, and I re fell in love with Bruce Springsteen all over again. So I think that's why I'm very interested in this, but also amazed how much he sounds like Springsteen.

Really does, which is incredible. Bruce recorded that record as like solo demos on a little four track recorder in his bedroom at his home in New Jersey.

Yeah, which is pretty incrediblezing.

To think that Bruce Springsteen even in nineteen eighty two, he was a big star already, so to be doing that at home pretty revolutionary back then.

Right.

I'll definitely go see that movie, did you? If you said it? I missed it? When does it come out?

October twenty fourth?

Long and they're already pumping the trailer.

I know, they're really dragging us along for this, getting us pumped up for it.

Yeah, that is the story we love.

If you missed the JB and Sandy Show between seven and eight this morning, here's something you missed, all right, Thanks for being with us. It's the JB and Sandy Show. My name is Sandy. This is JB. Trisha's here too.

Hi everybody, and away we go.

Give us a follow on TikTok at JB Sandy at X same thing on Instagram. Tricia, You're about to be horrified with what I'm about to tell you.

Yeah, okay, it's not it's not here yet.

But up in North Texas, sty had a bunch of heavy rain and it flushed out the foot long hammerhead flatworms longo.

Yeah.

They are an invasive specie that sneaks into gardens and long lawns. Their hammerhead shape makes them pretty easy to spot, but they ooze a neurotoxin that can irritate human skin and sickened pets. Anything that oozes something gross. If you do see someone in Sea one in Austin, Central Texas, they say, wear gloves. Never cut them all right, Instead drop them into a salt and vinegar mix, or freeze them for two days before tossing them out.

Oh that Sandy, that's right, a nine year old Sandy's alley and freezing them.

Dude's torture them for a while. The things we did to insects as a child. I mean, I'm surprised they didn't ship me off somewhere to make sure I wasn't a future Cereal coll We did some man like I think everybody did.

You guys, jabe, this is a dude thing. I don't think girls did this.

Maybe I know where you're gonna say, magnifying.

Glass, magnify salt on sluge.

Oh yeah, absolutely. How about this one airplane glue on ants?

You guys know I didn't do that. You guys didn't do that one?

No, No, that was that was fun You just airplane blued ants.

Oh yeah, I mean and I oh yeah.

It's funny because now, as an adult, I will take the time to free and most insects into the wild and give them another chance.

I don't squish anymore. Like if I see something out on my walk, I just let them go. I don't care.

You squished and smeared lightning bugs.

An adult, you're still a killer.

No, as a kid, I'll kill it.

I'll kill a nasty spider.

We used to do that too, catch lightning bugs, and you pulled a little light off their tail and you could put it on your body like glowing jewelries.

Happy about it?

A tea on my shirt and lightning bud guts. I was disgusting.

So we we did all these weird things with insects and my cousins. It was a my cousin's three or four years older than I am.

I was young.

I was like ten, and he had a neighbor. This was in Tucson, Arizona, in the middle of summer.

It was kind of.

Hot, and we didn't have a water bottle like every other kid does today. And so he had this other kid and his name was Marty, and Marty was like fifteen, and we did some weird stuff.

So Marty Marty two stories about him.

He dared me to see if I could shove ten roly pulleys up my notes.

And as a it was like a double dog there.

Oh, well, then you had to do There was no way I had to do it.

Was there a prize involved if you pulled this off? Probably not just a double dog here.

I think he was gonna let me look at his playboy. I think I can't remember. So we gathered up ten. Here's the problem with the roly pulley. They roll up right there, need to go up the nose. The problem is when they got the nose and the right so we.

Were very cautious.

I got them all up there, and then we got and then count made sure we counted all of them that came that we had that came out. Yeah, yeah, that might be some kind of world record. I'm not sure, but it might be. Another story about Marty which is pretty funny. So Marty was like fifteen and he his parents for some reason, boughtom a car before he had a driver's license. Right, he couldn't even drive the car,

Again for the thousandth time. Thank God that God gave me a daughter and not his son.

Oh those were great times.

I have a feeling Marty's still in his car he was playing.

With, probably still there in Tucson, or that he's telling stories to his buddies about this dumb kid that he tricked him a shoving rolls up his nose. Oh, how fun I had thought, Old Marty in a long time.

What's his name?

I don't remember his last name.

I was going to look him up.

No, I do not remember Marty's last name.

But now that I can, maybe I think Marty got sent off to a boy's home somewhere.

Yeah, maybe things haven't changed that much. I remember when my daughter was like maybe middle school, and we were at a restaurant, a patio restaurant, and this acquaintance of hers, this young kid that somebody said, I'll give you ten bucks if you lick all those hands off the table.

And he did it. So, you know, yeah, we haven't changed much. Hey, dudes are dudes. Man.

We do dumb stuff for the dumbest creature on earth between the age of like twelve and thirty, for.

No reward, no anything, for the poly noosed trick.

No, I got to say I did it, you know. Then I got to sit in his car.

Part.

It was funny because Marty'd be like, oh, I got one, and we could be three doors down and we'd run run to the car as fast as because they're disgusting. We'd get in the car and just wait and it happened. I won several times. That was from earlier this morning. On the JB and Sandy Show. Stream the podcast whenever you want. Search JB and Sandy on the iHeartRadio app three Austin's Well, it's June in Central Texas. Time to be outside, and you know it's going to be hot.

You got way too much going on to worry about your roof.

That's why I am really thankful for my friends Scott and Stacy Feller and their team at Kingaroof.

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Right.

So we've heard about zebra's getting loose. We've heard of elephants, you name it, any creature that's gotten loose.

I'm like, hey, they're free.

They earned it, they did it. They outsmarted their captors.

Right, and we got another case. And it's not very often that you hear about a mongoose on the loose.

Right in Britain, a mongoose he escaped one of the wildlife parks. He ended up in a very unusual place. He ended up at a pub down the street about fifteen miles from the zoo.

His name is Gef.

Gef So he escaped, went to the bar, hang around at the bar for a while. Then they said he was gone for a few days and then returned later, and they're like, we think we went back to the to the zoo for a little He had her check in ready, had to check in.

It's kind of like the prisoner that escapes a prison and goes back because they got hungry, right, That's.

Probably what happened. By the way.

The mongoose is described as a weasel like animal totally in about twenty six inches in length, with a long, brownish body, short legs, and a tail as long as its body.

Yep, carnivores.

I feel like they're a distant cousin of the honey badger. Perhaps definitely looked like they might be related to a ferret. But I feel like I've heard ma, mongooses are the ones who can fight the cobras.

Yes, I just yeah, I just they can handle snakes. Yeah, they've got a special spidy sense about them that they are snake killers.

Yeah.

Yeah, I like that.

I like it that he went to the bar.

Look at all these videos I can watch today of mongoose versus cobra.

Wow, is that what you're gonna do?

Yeah? Cobra versus mongoose.

So this is good, Okay, So I feel like maybe he should be on Ryan Reynolds's new animal series called Underdogs. Remember I told you about it. He's talking about like the top of the food chain. He's talking about all of like this. He calls them the zeros, not the heroes, the zeros of the animal world. And I watched the first episode the other night and they had a honey badger on it.

That's what made me think of it.

Do you know that the honey badger is virtually indestructible, Like a pack of dogs were holding him at all different ends, pulling him apart, and he was perfectly fine because his skin is indestructible.

He's like stretch armstrong.

He's like stretch armstrung. He's real baggy.

They got a hold of him, but they couldn't pull him apart. I feel like a mongoose might be a featured guest on Underdogs.

This is pretty funny because Ai says as it says, and he fights between a mongoose and a snake. The mongoose typically has the upper hand due to its agility, speed, and resistance to snake venom.

Yep, the honey badger also resistant to snake them.

There are some tough creatures out there. I know this monk.

I want to see mongoose versus honey badger.

Let's ride into Ryan Reynolds and say, let's find this pairing anyway.

GEF, I guess they could be calling him Jeff.

It's just a g e F. Let's call him Jeff. Yeah, Jeff went to the bar by the way. I think it's hilarious.

And a showdown between a mongoose and a honey badger. The honey badger would likely win due to its superior size, strength and powerful jaws.

Yeah, honey badger, don't play.

No, you've seen that video, right, Yes, I have hysterical yes, all right, Well that mongoose has arted its freedom.

Yeah, let the boy have a drink.

Yeah, you and go back to the zoo.

Go back to the zoo for a little irven.

Stay with us.

We've got more coming up the Diary of Perpetual Disappointments.

But first a quick backstory.

Yes, it's a book that I got for Sandy a few years ago as a joke. I had no idea that he would actually keep it and fill it out. It is the exact opposite of an inspiration journal.

Correct.

It is things that he writes down to remember to be angry about them, Like if his mine kind of lets it go and he moves on, he'll go back and read his Diary of Perpetual disappointments, remember that situation, and be angry all over again.

For example, here's some entries that I've made over the years of doing this. How I know I am not one of God's little soldiers people I know I will never speak to again. Things I know. I will be a failure at grudges. I'll always keep things. I'll never organize conversations. I've overheard games.

I'm not good at games. I'm not good at and best guess when I will die.

Texts I wish I hadn't sent. Yeah, oh, lots of that, lots of lots and lots of those.

This latest one is I don't know if it's really my fault or not, but my entry into my perpetual Diary of Perpetual disappointments is deodorants that eventually failed.

TDF is what you have there.

TDF is more of a moment, but overall, it's a deodorant that is totally failed.

TDF total deodorant failure.

You put your deodorant on.

It works perfectly for X amount of time, and then one day it goes on strike.

One day you put it on and you still stink.

Yes, and that happened to me yesterday, really, and that is terrible, terrible.

I couldn't believe you didn't say something to me.

Well, I don't think I was near your pits. I don't think I was around.

I didn't have to be that close really, especially after I worked out. Remember, and I need to get in the shower so bad. Yeah, yeah, and you you calculated when I would be home from the gym and got in the shower.

Let me say again what I said last night. I don't think about you that much.

Yes, you do.

I don't you do too, I absolutely don't. When I wanted to shower, the shower was open and I showered.

Yeah, you took your time.

It was in an out in less than ten minutes. You are ridiculous.

So now, but the thing my problem is is that I buy most of my toiletries in bulk.

Yep.

So I've got six more sticks of this perpetual of this deodor d that doesn't work. It doesn't work anymore again at Costco, I get it on Amazon, which, by the way, I know how they do it, but it still impresses me. They send me reminders of when I need things and I do, Like I need shaving cream. I got a reminder, Hey, you probably need shaving cream, and I looked. I was like, oh my god.

That creeps me out a little bit.

To see your buying patterns.

I use that nightguard in my sleep with the nightguard so I don't grib my teeth. Yeah. I literally was like, I need to get a new one of these, and I open up Amazon. There's a reminder, Hey, do you need one of these?

I can see the nightguard thing. But regarding this shaving cream, you have a bald head. You use twice as much shaving cream as average bear because you're not only shaving your face, you're shaving your head too.

So how do they know Because they've seen my buying patterns. They saw that it was three months.

I like it. It's great. I buy all my toilet trees on Amazon.

Yeah, but now, like, what happens you have you have a non functioning deodorant.

You got six of a non functioning deodorant has been.

Called yeah, so hot. Now what do we do.

Well, I guess I just order something else, keep that. When that one fails, go back.

To that one, switch it back.

I think.

So that's my entry into my diary of perpetual disappointments. Let's wrap it up with some of the things we learned.

All right, My first funny today I think is funny. Somebody share it with you guys. Again, I don't think it's fare when other people have banana bread and I do not have a banana bread.

Very simple, but very to the point.

Same could apply for a cinnamon roll.

Cinnamon roll, an iced sugar cookie, a donut. Yeah, it just isn't fair one way.

I get very mad when others have donuts.

You have a weird thing with donuts. I mean, I'm just putting it out there.

I haven't had one.

Like your eyes kind of get big, like you get it. You go into like frantic mode with donuts.

It'll be three o'clock in the afternoon, I'll go get donuts.

Yeah, you came in one day and you're like, would you like to go on a donut dat?

It was so romantic.

I had one, you had five.

Yep. Yeah, I'm doing it. I'm doing it big, Yep.

I guess.

So another thing we learned. Charlie Sheen, Tiger's Blood Winning. He's writing his autobiography. It's called the Book of Sheen, and he is talking about all the things in here.

You know what's funny is and I said it kind of earlier, But I've I had a wild life. I mean from my college years to my forties, pretty out of control.

Nothing compared to Charlie Sheen.

Oh, he laughed at you. If you told him some of your stories, you.

Would call me an amateur. And most of my stories will blow people away. But Charlie, she's a whole different level.

Yeah, he said, nothing's off limits, all the things. It's like a train wreck in book for him. I have to watch it, like to listen to it.

Remember the Wolf of Wall Street.

Remember in the Bachelor party they went on and they destroyed an entire floor of a hotel.

Stuff like that.

Charlie Sheen levels.

Yeah, that's professional.

I know. I really want him to do the audiobook version him reading it, because that's what I'm going to listen to it. I'd rather hear him talking about it. You're just reading the book too. And finally, Jeremy Allen White known from the hit TV show The Bear is portraying Bruce Springsteen in the movie called Deliver Me from Nowhere.

And just know that Jeremy Allen White does the singing himself.

It's pretty impressive. Here you go, here's the trailer.

Here's what I want you to understand. This is not about the charts. This is about Bruce Springsteen. What are you doing with this album?

Don't tell me that wasn't Bruce Springsteen singing that? Pretty cool, It's amazing. What's amazing about it?

Is?

It kind of focuses on the album Nebraska, which came out in nineteen eighty two and had.

No hits, right, none, no doubt.

All the music, yeah, all the music going to hear it as all the hits. But you know, Bruce never had a number one.

I feel like we just figured that out not too long ago.

That's shocking. And his worst song got to number two, Dancing in the Dark.

Oh, it was the first song I associate with Bruce Springsteen. First time I heard it and Courtney Cox getting pulled up on the stage.

It was the video is MTV video time?

You like songs that tell stories, right? Listen to Johnny ninety nine okay from Bruce Springsteen.

All right, great stuff anyway.

If you want to see that movie, Deliver Me from Nowhere, it doesn't come out till October.

Have a great day and a great weekend. Friends, Thanks for spending time with us. We do appreciate it. We'll do it again on Monday. Be here for it, Okay. Until then, don't take any crap from anybody.