FBI

I can only look forward literally and spiritually. I am only looking forward from now on, and I'm not going to move until the muscle relaxant has kicked in and the pain has completely gone away. So you're going to have to tell me your facial expressions so I know how you're feeling. Do you do you understand? Are you? Are you nodding right now? Nodding? Yes? Understand? What kind of muscle relaxing did you take? You know? It's a little bottle of muscle relaxans I've had for a while.

The name is is actually rubbed off from the bottle. My mom passed the bottle down to me years ago when I was a little boy, and she said, take this if your neck hurts. I also have a bottle of aged codeine syrup. It's about seven years old. Do you want something? It's in that the brown bag in my purse. You know, you know what I mean? Yeah, I'll take some. Wait's what kind of muscle relaxing did you take? It doesn't have a full name on it. It's it's only only has one syllable. It's it's a

it's a finished name. It was a drug that was banned from Finland in the fifties after the Prince of Finland took it. What happened to him? Well, he, uh, he has a bad back. He takes a then some people in his pal us take it. It gets around, you know, then rumor has it, all of the servants in his palace turned into pieces of furniture, candlesticks and footstools. Wait, did he turn into a beast? Who told you that?

I think it's from Beauty and the Beast. I think you're What you're saying is that the prince and the beauty and the beast in his entire castle had a bad reaction to a muscle reaccent. So people know about that. Yeah, it's actually a children's story. Are you frowning? You think I shouldn't have taken it? No, I'm smiling. I'm glad you're okay, and I hope you feel better. I can

tell you're rolling your eyes. I'm not. On today's episode, we're talking about the rule of law, those who vow to serve and protect, and who better to talk to than a dog who has saved twelve lives. That's right, Freda, the world famous rescue dog, is in the studio. Okay, I wait, I didn't get Frieda. I can't. I can't see you, so I can't tell if you're joking. Are you joking? Run? She's busy, So Frieda is busy. This is just for the people at home. This is a

real dog. Frieda a beautiful blonde lab. I encourage everyone to look her up. She has spent her life helping to rescue survivors from natural disasters around the world. She's maybe the most real in the World's a hero, and she's worked since she was a puppy. She's ten years old. Now she's saved twelve I know that. Why Why do you think I wanted to book her? Yeah? But what was she going to say, roun? What was she gonna tell us she's a dog? You did this despite me?

You can hear it in your voice. You're upset. I don't know why, but you are. No, I'm still smiling anyway. I booked a human who can speak a former FBI agent. Former FBI agent. So, an FBI agent who got fired by someone more important. Did Freda the rescue dog fire him? No, he's happily retired. He was actually in the bureau for like twenty five years. Hey, no, do not take another muscle ride that Ron. Please don't handle that Ron. That's not yours. Oh my god, the floor. Okay, it's fine,

I know how many there are. No, I didn't you trust. I didn't mean to. Yeah, is there a coffee stir? I can snort that? That's really ill it? No, No, that's what I'll dorading in my guns. That one I saved. All right, all right, why did you do? Hey? Ow ow ow I mean that owl. I broke the skin. I probably broke the skin. We'll be right back with an FBI agent Christ. Welcome back to the Ron Burgundy Podcast. I'm Ron Burgundy, and I Heart Radio technically has me

on medical leave. I just want to say that upfront. Um. Today we are joined by a former FBI agent Joe Navarro. Joe, how are you. I'm good, Ron, good to be here. This is Carolina. Nice to meet you. I'm good, Joe. How how long were you with the FBI the bureau as they say, twenty five years? Twenty five years? Was it always a dream of yours? Um? It was the only job offer I had. It was not a bad no, no, no,

it wasn't a dream. I was very fortunate to have been at tendered an offered to to join the bureau. And did you did you work all over the country or were you based specifically in one one region? Um? I was all over. I was in Arizona, New York. Uh, Keepsie, No, no, no, do you know some No, I just like to say pokeepsie. Um, Joe, let me ask you this. In in the field, did you ever get a chance to work with any dogs and if so, what were they like to work with? Well?

As a matter of fact, I did, Um. Some of them protected us from you know, bomb sniffing dogs, and some had a tendency to just use us in the absence of fire hydrants. But yes, I know what that means, Joe. Any lazy dogs, any dogs, we just weren't. We are sharing a laugh. Well, I do, I do. I do remember one that was supposed to be a bomb sniffing dog. But honestly, I thought it was high most of the time because his his work ethic um needs to be questioned.

But but he was. But he was arched to be desired. Yes, he was an older dog and there wasn't a foreign posting. So yeah, when you retire an FBI dog, I'm sure you have to give him a fake name and set him up in housing, give him a fake identity, things like that so they don't squeal. Right. I've never been to the witness production program for dogs. Yeah, I haven't been to the dog farewell, but I know they're well taken care of. That's uh, that's moment we get it, okay,

wink wink uh. Joe, let me ask you this. Were you always against crime and are you still against crime or now that you've retired, to you a little more pro crime? I have to say I've always been against crime. Yeah, good, thank you. I'm glad you answered it that way. Yeah, no, no issue there, good, no issue there. What do you think of that? Blowhard? James co me M glad we got that bumb out of there. Geez Louise, what mocking

up the works? Right, Jim Bocomy grabbing the headlines. I shouldn't be laughing, but you know I I knew him when when he was the U S attorney in the No, not in Pockkeepsie, he wasn't. He was in Virginia, I believe. And um, he had a very good reputation then, but never really associated with him. So I got you. Um, this is random, Joe, because we were talking about Frieda. Carolina was bringing up this dog Frieda who rescues people? Were you fired from the FBI? Did in fact no

dog fire? You know? I somehow managed to survive the twenty five years? Yeah? Great? Yeah, And and so you're a former FBI agent because you just you had done your time and you retired game sick of the game. Well it was time. I guess. You can only do it for so long before you get burnt out. Right while you start to slow down. You can't run as fast, you can't jump as high, and fast twitch muscle fibers go once they go forget it. Yeah yeah, you me and Lebron right. Yeah, although I was in a group.

Yeah group, it's Joe, You and Lebron. That's our mini rat pack. You know, there's a there's a time for everything, and there was a time to move on and years is enough. No years, I mean you you you should be proud of that service. I've never, god, have I ever committed to anything for twenty five years. That's a really good question. Well, of course, the faithful reporting of the news, that's one thing. And there were those two

years you said you were going off the grid. I've collected rare Saki's for twenty five years, so my socke collection, that's something I can feel proud about. So, Joe, I am a in Carolina. I think I can speak on your behalf. Two. We are true crime junkies and uh and we we would love to if you're up for it, take your you get your professional opinion on on some famous interrogations. And you've probably studied these when you're at

the academy. But um so maybe it might be redundant, but if you wouldn't mind looking over some of these clips with us, Okay, great, Yeah, that's okay, And we're gonna play this first one. Um, this is an interrogation. This is something Ron pulled up. It's one of his favorite programs, but he says because of the accuracy, it's a powerful interrogation from the show. Colombo telling me where you were last night Sunday night at the movies alone? No,

with Irving? And where did you go after the movie? Back to Herb's place? Did you have your Yes? But on weekends I usually like to sleep over at Herb's. At what time did you get back to my part? About ten thirty? And then what you do? We watched TV and what did you do with if you watch TV? We made love? Okay, then we went to sleep and neither you left the apartment between eleven thirty and three am. No, I told you first we watched TV and then we

made love. And Mr Crutch never left the apartment. If you were asleep, I would you know, left the apartment or not? Well, we didn't actually go to sleep till maybe about two thirty. These things take time, now, and that's the crunch. Never left the upon No, the letable room now? Oh well, once to get me fresh orange juice. Very suggestive. She keeps talking about making love. It's a little explicit, little crass and and those of you guys are listening at home, can't see the clip. But she

is beautiful. Oh my god. I don't know if that helps. She is gorgeous, Joe, I'm sure you had. Did you have to hear language like this at work? M hmm yeah, but not from the suspects? Um, did that suspect talk way too much? Well? You know what was interesting is the methodology. You know, you have to account for all the behavior and all the time. So m. Colombo was impeccable. There. Colombo's very thorough. You want to get that time that time frame down. But did you notice the guy never

said a word. Yeah, she's there with her boyfriend. He's not saying a word. But that's women for you. Talk talk talk talk zip it up, but not now, no, not not then back then Yeah, now, women can talk all you want. Yeah. Thanks. Um. I've heard that there's a technique that a lot of cops use where they just repeat a lot of questions to try to catch if your story, to see how consistent your story? Would you use that, Joe, I would use a form of that. I would uh, you know, I just dig down deeper.

I just say could I have more details? So if they said yeah, if they say I entered the house, I want to know, well, which door was it and was the light on or not? Right? Yeah, well let's take a look and see. But I like that clip. Oh well we have, we've We've got a couple more.

This next one is from the show Chicago p D. Y and uh, I know most guys in the forest must love coming home relaxing after work and watching Chicago p D. It must be so relaxing to go watch a show and where you're fighting the same bad guys and you you're having the same love triangles. Yeah, that's true, you guys are Is there a favorite show in the fields besides Chicago p D? Well, I mean, now, the big one is mind Hunter. Oh yes, I've read the

book and watched the show. Very big fan. Yeah, very popular. I get more questions about that, like how how close to the real thing isn't But but the second most questions you get is from Chicago p D. Though, right, uh Ron no, uh okay, No, that's good for me too. It's good for me too because I've been telling people that mo FBI former FBI guys love and talk about and get questions about Chicago p D. There's also Chicago Fire.

There's Chicago, Chicago mad There's Chicago Daycare. There's Chicago Travel Agency. There's Chicago Airport, which they should just called O'Hare what they should call it, called Chicago Airport. But the list goes on and on. It's it's NBC's lineup, and they're doing a great job. They're knocking it out of the park. Okay, let's play this from Chicago. P d oh wan, lawyer, lawyer, He wants a lawyer. H get him a lawyer. This

is illegal that he needs a lawyer right now. Oh my god, if you one chance to tell me where the Brasils gets on? Oh my god, I'm scared of him. And give me the past words. Saw you twisted websites? Yeah? What's in it from me? Yeah? What's good? Okay? Reasonable? He also would like a lawyer. Yeah, your ability to live? Oh my god, excuse me? You heard him? Well, as they say in Poughkeepsie, whoa yeah, yeah, whoa right? Joe? Okay, so Joe is that cops voice? What what you guys

are supposed to sound like? Only if you smoke four packs a day? Only if you smoke four packs a day. He might just be sexy. He might just be inherently sexy. Well, that's that's true too, But Ron I, I gotta go with you. When when he said I want my attorney, that's it. You gotta walk out of that room. Joe. Can you give me your sexiest gravellist voice right now as if you were on Chicago p D? Yeah? Ron, where were you last night? Yeah? Can you give me a little more gravel D? I need to know. I

need to know what we're worried last night? Were you? Because you're not leaving this room until you tell me. God, Joe, that is good. Good, that's really good. Watch out Chicago p D. Joe Navarro, p D. Jetskmi. I'm James Komi and I'm seven ft doll. Punch you in the nuts. You don't give me the info? Is that a direct quote? No, I'm just riffing as jos and what I think James would say. Do I still do? I still have to gravel? Oh? No, No, you're good, You're good, Joe. I mean, unless you want

to know. I don't want to sound like what's his name on the Simpsons? So, Joe, are you married? Can I ask? I am? Indeed? Because you might want to try that voice out in the bedroom tonight. That was free. That was free. Okay, let's go to another Chicago p D. Is it right, Caroline, Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah it is um Okay, it's just a knock on the door the girls apartment. Girls that she opens the door. What are you doing here? This doesn't seem like an interrogation scene.

He brought her back up. That's where it went. I bumped into your desk and and accidentally fell in my pocket. I know you didn't parking that I didn't have time. You didn't. You took it so you could come and show up at her apartment. Come on, I didn't just fall off the apple truck. I like this writing though a guy has ever used to try to get into my apartment, I was expecting it. Thank you. You know that actor actually dated Lady Gaga. Fun fact, you're missing

the best part kissing smooth your rooney kissing? Now? Is this what you're watching here, Joe? Pretty common in the FBI world amongst colleagues. Only only with our spouses. That is not common. That's by the way. Did you did you notice her body her body language? Immediately you had that head tilt, and of course head tilt means uh kind of. I'm I'm interested. I'm curious. I'm curious, I'm interested. Yeah, we only know what Joe. We forgot that you. You

are a expert on body language? Is that is that true? Yes? Yeah, I've been studying it for about forty years. How does that affect your marriage? Do you? Sometimes you say I can tell you're full of it to your wife. Well, head tilt, honey, arms, arms folded, I can tell you're a set. Yeah. The the your lips are compressed and the glabella, the little area between your eyes is furrowed. So keep it clean, keep it clean. Sorry, and uh, so I know you're stressed, and she'll say knock it off,

and uh and I will pliantly abide. Um. But you know, it's it's funny. You have to sometimes you have to turn it off at home because when you can see everything, it can be annoying. So you just have to pretend you're just seeing somebody stressed. You have to turn that part of your brain off. Yeah, I understand that. Yeah, Caroline, you had to go to your oh B to have your gloat checked out. Yeah, well wait, wait, what about your fil trum tum? Is that um? What connects your

teeth to your mouth because your gum. No, it's a little area just below the nose that and and connects to your upper lip pilum. That's called the fill trumen. That's also an erogenous zone, isn't it. Well, it could be. But what's interesting is during interviews when people are stressed, how this little area sort of fills up with moisture. Okay, so and you can tell that during interrogations that helps you. It's yeah, it just tells you, well, whatever the questions

I'm asking, they're stressed. So the question is why it So, if you were into crime, it pay to have all the sweat pores removed from your fildrum. Yeah, or ever be caught. Yeah, and interrogation or botoxed. Botox gets rid of the the ability to sweat from there. Yeah. Smart poker players do it. Poker players get botox in their filter. They get botox and a lot of places because they give so much away with their faces called a tell A tell, Yeah, yeah, yeah, Should I go back to

that voice? Well please? The health Yeah, my filterm, my filter is sopping with What was the first body part you mentioned, Joe, the globella that was the first part. Beautiful name for a girl. Um, so, Joe, tell me about Quantico. And for for our listeners who don't know what Quantico is, what can you explain that? Yeah, Quantico is the the the famous Marine Corps base and they allowed us to on their property to build the FBI

Academy and uh and that's where all agents go. I will tell you this, and most people don't realize this. At Quantico, the dormitory doors never had a lock. And that's because the people were so honest that, um, you didn't need locks. And I have to say, I've never been in an institution where you didn't have to lock your door. Did anyone while you were there? To get kicked out of? Quantico isn't easy place to get kicked out of. Uh, very much, so very much drinking a

beer or staying out too late. No, it was it was usually either because of physical fitness or they didn't do well in the academics. Oh, because you're basically you're the dummies and the fatties they get the boot. Well, I wouldn't put it that way. It's I mean, we had we had some people that just could not for instance, the trigger test. They couldn't do the trigger poll test. What's the trigger pol test? It's, uh, you know, how much strength do you have in that that index finger

to pull the trigger? Uh, consistently as though you were in a firefight. And some people, believe it or not, could not pass that test, Caroline. I'm gonna put you through the trigger poll test every morning and if you don't pass it, what are you serious? We'll just have to find someone else. God. Yeah, Ron, it has to be job related. I think it has to be job related. Okay, all right, good to know. And what did you guys do for fun at Quantico? Uh? Was there a lot

to be had? Not? Really? It was you know, any pranks? Oh? Yes, can I lots of pranks? Can I? Can I tell you one? Please? Please? Okay, Joe we go. So one of the one of the one of the classes could be this is gonna be right out of a script of Chicago p D. I already feel it. Yeah. One of the class counselors was he was a little bit too uptight, so um so that everybody we had taken

a class on crime scene. So we staged that that somebody had jumped from the sixth story building and we called the class counselor over and said, look, look what just happened. And um, I didn't partake him this, I only heard about it. But apparently as a result of looking down the window and seeing what he thought was a somebody that had jumped the class counsel well, he developed a nervous tick in his face that three years

later was apparently still there. So, oh, you guys, you that this stunt, it looked, triggered a debilitating tick that will haunt him for the rest of his days. But now we call that. Now, we call that PTSD. So they framed yea yea very serious. Yeah, good stuff that was. That was in the seventies. Those things took place in the seventies. No, totally, yeah, no. So what is this last clip that you pulled up? This is a this is a clip We're gonna really it's important to you.

Here's a clip that I want you to watch. Jim Crocey. It's just Jim crowbarator. I'm gonna be honest. The muscle relaxing has fully kicked in. And I love this song. Anyway. Do I need to keep asking you questions? You don't care about that, right, I mean Joe, think about it. I've been interrogating you. You're probably like, all right, man, lay off, let's just all hang out. Yeah. Yeah, we're

all friends and we should just be hanging out. I love it when we all get to get it like this, and no, is there going to be a question, Joe, Joe quiet, I've learned to take it well, just not the way you rock roun. All right, Ron passed out. Nick, Let's just cut to the commercial. Let's cut commercial, and we're back with the Ron Burgundy Podcast. I have never been more awake, Ron, I'm not kidding. You were a stille three hours. Everyone else has had like a whole

day here. I ran to Errand's. Nick picked up his kids from school. Our intern renewed their passport really while I was here at work. Wow, welcome to the millennial workforce, ladies and gentlemen. They're really great employees. Is the FBI guys still here, by the way, Joe, No, he left right when you start playing Jim Crocey and then you asked him to hang out, got it? You know, I love Jim, but I've had a few people turn away when I put that record on. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah.

It makes people feel things up already, right, It gets vulnerable, emotional. Well, this was an episode where we laid down the law and I hope everyone at home feels a little safer after hearing what our community of law enforcement. Carolina, are you still here? I can't look around, so you need to. You need to walk me home. You can't leave, Okay, do not sneak out. I wouldn't do that. I'm just going to stand up now and please help me walk

out and wrap my scarf around me. Okay, sunglasses, sunglasses, hat, hat, purse first. Good night, folks. I'll catch you next time on The Ron Burgundy Podcast. Don't fix my hand? Okay, okay. The Ron Burgundy Podcast is a production of I Heart Radio. I'm Ron Burgundy. The host, writer and executive producer Carolina Barlow is my co host, writer and producer. Our producer is Nick Stump. Our talent coordinator is Anna Hosny. Writers

are Andrew Steele and Jake Vobleist. This episode was engineered, mixed, and edited by Nick step m