I'd like to acknowledge the traditional owners on which this episode is being recorded, the combo marry people. We pay our respects to elders past, present and emerging and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples. Today I'm your host, Georgie Stevenson, and this is the
Rise and Conquer Podcast. This is the podcast where which have mindset, self development and becoming your higher self mix soon with a lot of laughs, plus behind the scenes of my life running two businesses and being among Think of us as the perfect combo of brunch with your besties mixed with self development. No matter where you are in your journey, We're here to help you be curious, pull yourself out, and embrace radical self awareness.
If you're ready to get into.
The driver's seat of your own life and stop letting life past you by, then you're in the right place. Hello and welcome back to the ron C Potty. On today's episode, we are unpacking the concept of being too much, what it actually means about you, about the person saying it, and how you can move forward. We also chat about do you actually need to change your behavior or is
this something you can brush off. So if you've ever been told that you're too much of anything, too much, too excited, too loud, too dramatic, too selfish, then you're gonna love this episode. I also, I do a bit of a spin because I think the people who click on this episode and then listen, you're probably not going to expect what I say. So true, but it's a goodie. Keep listening. But before we get into the episode of tea,
I just want to remind the ron C community. Our limited edition Life Happens for Me journaling boxes launch tomorrow at five pm. Set your alarms if you're listening in real time? Yeah, which is the nineteenth?
Is it nineteenth?
The nineteenth of April? Tomorrow, the nineteenth of April, five pm. They are limited edition. They include our beautiful journal, our beautiful Life Happens for Me glass that's secure little pink bubble mug that you've seen around I've been showing you guys. It includes a beautiful butterfly diffuser, a signature RNC sent Oh my god, it's incredible. It's grounding but also activating.
So guys, set your alarm.
It's limited edition, and ten dollars from every single box does go to Pink Elephants Support Network, who support women going through early miscarriages. Such a beautiful charity to partner with on this and we are so proud and yeah, so we're so excited. Georgie, what's your weekly recommendation? Well, okay, so how do I explain this? Well, I'm dabbling with the idea. I'm not fully there, but I was telling
the girls. We had a team lunch a couple of weeks ago, and I was telling the girls that I've really been playing with this idea to fully stop consuming content that scares me.
So just in the way of I just.
Noticed how much, you know, social media, Netflix was consuming my time.
And I don't think I'm gonna go.
Cold turkey, but I'm just, I guess taking it up a notch with how intentional I'm being. No Netflix during the week. I can watch Netflix on the weekend with Tim as like a me and him thing, But no Netflix during the week unless it's a documentary.
That's the rule. You would to shut your mouth.
You guys can see my face. His mouth's open so wide. He shocked Wow and off social media media by seven seven point thirty, even though that's more because Ivy goes to bed at six. We have dinner and then I check my social media. But then once I get in bed, it's like off social media. Tim's actually deleted all his social media apps. I know he's currently going through a bit of a self development journey, and he's like, I love that, I just need to delete them because he
just finds he wastes so much shine on them. So just more this idea of being so intentionable. And as you guys know, I do have a coach at the moment, and it's it's a one on one vibe. But also as a byproductor of that, I get a lot of you know, her course content. And so what I'm doing is like just like immersing myself completely in when I'm not working, It's like I'm doing self development, or I'm
reading a book, or I'm in the sauna. I'm not scrolling, I'm not just watching random things to like, you know, I'm just being very intentional. Yeah, and so I will update this is a new thing. But I'm also just like I'm speaking it because it also gives me a bit of an accountability of And I said to the girls, I wonder what could shift and change if I stuck to this. So that's all I'm saying. Who knows, I
love that. I'm just being very honest with you. So my weekly recommendation is, can you check in maybe do a bit of an audit of where you're currently not being intentional with what you consume? I love that. What's your weekly good solid watch?
Your Netflix recommendation? A tear? I have two.
One recommendation is Netflix. One is not because I felt like I needed to bring something else to the table. So my first recommendation, which is Netflix, is the Night Agent series.
I started watching this.
You didn't like it, no, when it first came out a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, I just thought it was really bored.
Oh I loved it.
I'm in polar opposite. It's like the first TV series I've watched in such a long time that I was like, no, I'm gonna watch this an episode at a time over a few days because I needed to give my attention to it, Like I couldn't cook and watch.
Yeah kind of thing.
I just I'm not vibe in the whole like White House. Oh okay, I love them. I love those. If you've like if you like White House, down or like Olympus's Fallen, those kind of movies.
I like scandals. I didn't like Scandal.
Okay, what'll she next? My second recommendation is an episode of the Life on Cut podcast that I listened to. It's called Matthew Hussey does Not Give a F Word about Your Relationship, and it's an interview with a man named Matthew Hussey, and he's like a very very well known relationship expert, and I just loved hearing his perspective on stuff. I'd seen videos of him for years, like he's been on YouTube for years. If you look at
his face, you'll probably know him. And what I really loved that they spoke about was the concept of needing to be your whole self fixed and ready for a relationship before you get into one, and how he doesn't.
Agree with that.
So it's a really, really great interview and I'd highly recommend that to pretty much everyone. I love that.
That's actually so interesting.
I was reading a quote.
I will literally take.
A photo it because Kay I thought of this exact thing, and it was kind of this quote about yeah, not agreeing that you know how it's like to love some I've got it. It's like to love someone how to love yourself first before someone can love you. Yes, and it was saying, we don't agree with that quote because you need someone to show like you need to be shown how to love first. Yeah?
Is that him? And we think about that.
Maybe that is from him because he he was sort of along this a similar line. But he also like brought up that sometimes you'll have insecurities, but that'll be someone's favorite thing. Their favorite thing about you is the thing you're insecure about, and they will show you like a different way to love yourself almost. Yeah, if that makes sense. Yeah, I love that.
Yeah, and so cool.
Also about how in relationships it's not necessarily about doing everything together, but it's about supporting your partner in whatever they want to do. And he spoke about how he has some ritual he does in the morning that his partner would never do, but he does it like in a different room in the house and one time he woke up and she'd set up the room perfectly for him to do it, and it just meant so much to him that even though she didn't do it, she
respected that he did. But yeah, really get an interviews. I'm pulling the most random bits from it. It probably not being too convinced.
No, we love it. Yeah, but I loved it.
I highly recommend.
Yeah, awesome.
All right, let's get into the episode.
Yeah, well, let's bloody get straight into it.
So today we're talking of the concept of being too much.
I love this so much.
Why because I've had this said to me so many times throughout my life, and I feel like most listeners would too, one hundred percent. If you're an R and C listener, you've probably been told you too much. I like, and you know this can be you have been told you're too much like in regards to you're too energetically, you're too like hyped up, you're too emotional, you're too loud, you're too unpredictable, you're too difficult.
I was the difficult one.
I was, And I also like, you're too spicy or too direct, too dramatic, Oh, so dramatic. It was like, my whole childhood is mean getting called dramatic and difficult, and also me getting called like selfish. You know, I felt like as a child, I held my boundaries really strong, and so like I was called like, oh, you're being selfish, you're not thinking about the others, but I'm like, no, no.
I just know my boundaries. Wow, yeah, don't you think I was?
No? I agree in like that definition, but I was like a doormat as a kid and through high school. Yeah, no boundaries none, a tr I know, But I know better now. Yeah, good, I do know better now. And like one thing that someone said to me that stuck with me. They're like people are dormats and dinosaurs, and then then it's like a good in between when it comes to like holding your boundaries. But some people who are dormats all the time, you'll come out and be
a dinosaur about the most random thing. And that would happen to me, Like I'd have little random almost explosions, super super silly things. Yeah, And I couldn't understand why until I actually learned that, like, oh, it's because I'm letting people push me over for so long and then I explode and it balances, but I could just maintain balance instead. That self awareness is amazing that you can even register that of like I'm not strong enough my boundaries.
That it's like I let it get to a limit and then there's this limit and then I explode rather than bringing the boundary back here and it's like this actually just gets to be it and.
Then it doesn't have to come out in a toxic way.
Yeah, because I used to do that too, like it would like build and build and build, and then it would come out in this like toxic way because they didn't know how to express myself.
Yes, but going back to it, so I have an interesting take on this.
I feel like this is a conversation we probably had on this podcast of being called too much, too much of whatever, and I feel like so many people can resonate with it, and I think there's two parts to this, so I want to speak to both. Yeah, so the first part is very much what you probably thought this episode was going to be about, where when someone's calling you too much, it's very much their responsibility of what they define and what's a thing for them, rather than like, actually,
what's wrong with you kind of thing. There is, though, a second part to this conversation where I feel like we haven't had this on the podcast, and I want to unpack this a little bit today of realizing that you also have a responsibility of if you're getting if you're feeling the feelings of shame because you feel too much, or guilt because you feel too much in whatever angle, or getting the feelings of your upset that someone called you too much, of taking some responsibility in regards to
not letting outside opinions sway you.
Yes, so true, don't you think?
It's kind of a two part And I think sometimes usually the conversation, especially I've been guilty of this of like we're like, oh, well, the other person's just they can't handle you know, even the quotes of like you know, if you think I'm too much, you don't get me at my or if you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my bed.
Yeah.
But the other one I was thinking of where it was. I saw it on TikTok and it was if you say I'm too much, go and find less. Yes, yes, like I think, like like I like, I do agree with it, but it's like also, I think a big part of self development too is realizing where the other person has responsibility. But also we're realizing you can have
responsibility and clean some stuff up. Because, for example, if you clicked into this episode that I'm you know, a tea is probably gonna call it something about being too much. It's because that provokes you, It upsets you, it triggers you. So you need to look into that trigger. Because truly, if if you were so clear on who you are, and you were so clear on like who you are at your heart and what you bring to the table, and that wasn't rocked, you wouldn't even be.
Worried about this.
Yeah, you wouldn't be clicking into an episode like this because you're like, I don't give a fuck.
Yeah, So that's why I just I.
Think we need to speak on kind of the both sides of like, you know, taking responsibility for yourself and then also realizing how much this is a representation of what the other person is going through. Yeah, so true. I actually have a cool quote that I wrote when I was getting my brows done.
Oh my gosh, I loved that.
I was not that I wrote, but it's like I had this thought on my head and I was like, I've got to write this down before I forget. So what I want to bring to this episode is like realizing that it doesn't matter externally what is seen, but it matters internally how you feel.
Let that simmer, Let that sink in.
So, for example, if someone telling you you're too much upsets you, dysregulates you, triggers you. It's because your identity of yourself you half believe them. Otherwise, why would it upset you?
Usually because you know who you are. Yeah, so that's what I'm saying.
I think there's two parts to this conversation, which is really cool because it's not just people like, of course there are just like jerks out there, there's people who are just like they're just their asshole, stupid assets. But also realizing when you know people are adding you and it's triggering you of like, oh, whereas actually my identity of self not solid here, I have a question.
Talk to me.
Do you feel like you've worked through the too much wound?
I do? Yeah.
I feel like I wasn't like really bad for you at any point huge in my early twenties, and I it was a I'm too much, I need to conform or I'm too much. Let me have a song and dance about it, like let me fucking tell you how you thinking I'm too much is all about you, and like let's make it dramatic. Oh my god, because truly it triggered me. Yeah, and I think like I think that's also fine. I think it's so normal.
We're all on our journey.
But that's I do feel like I have kind of transcended this wound, and that's kind of what I want to bring into it. If it does trigger you, I think you need to do some identity work around how
you see yourself and getting solid in how you see yourself. Yeah, and I think the biggest part here is realizing that you know someone's too much is another person's Holy shit, she's magnetic, you know, Like so many people would see my content and think, fuck, she is way too much, and then the exact same piece of content someone else is like, fuck, she's inspiring.
She just expanded me.
So do you see how like I can be Like if someone thinks I'm too much, or I'm too emotional, I'm too dramatic, or a big thing I'm actually.
Leaning into right now, I can be why I am.
I'm so direct, and I think some people can really see that as I'm not a heartfelt person, or I'm not a caring person, or I'm a mean person or whatever, And sometimes that can upset me or just regulate me because I am like, oh, but I am a caring person.
Yeah, like that's something I haven't fully like worked.
Through and I can fully see that, but it's like just kind of figuring out where you feel solid in who you are and where it's like, oh, I actually i'd want to feel solid in this aspect because I truly love how direct I am.
Yeah, because that's how I get points across.
That's how i am quickly, easily and quickly.
Because I've got no time.
And also that's what I love. And if someone's talking to me and they've just taken fucking twenty minutes to get to one point, I'm like, dude, I don't have dime in this. And also like stop with the context, stop with like the fluff. Yeah, tell me exactly how you feel, tell me your deepest, darkest secrets right now.
And let's just go straight in.
Do you mean like that's my vibe? Yeah, So that's the vibe I give out.
Yeah.
Because also I'm trying to attract people. Yeah, like that, So that's why I'm like, you know, you can battle with those sorts of things. So I think a big thing of like if you're told you're too much, and it does just regulate you a little bit of being like, oh, that's so interesting because I I, you know, my concept of self is I'm a confident person. But am I actually that confident if that comment upsets me? So true?
And then figuring out and it's all about reframing, so first of all, you know, like going straight into it of like not going into shame and guilt that that's still upset you or you know, I think also like I'm just gonna randomly bring this in. A big thing
that has helped me is like just not taking things personally. Yeah, how much does like one comment and you just fucking take it to heart and it's like the only thing you think of for years, for years, it can be for years, and it's like some on set of fleeting comment, like the amount of shit that comes out of my mouth that probably is just like me talking shit, And it's.
Not in a like no, I know what you mean.
It's like I would never want someone told onto that hold onto something. And I think that's also a big thing too, is like stepping back a little bit and being like, oh am I taking this too personally because also like how are you gonna get through life? Hard?
And like I want to live in the vibe of life happens for me.
So it's like, oh, nah, I'm just not gonna take that personally because also I know it's such a reflection of what that person is going through and they're level of emotional intelligence and their level of their self development. So true. So I'm like, oh, just not, I'm not here for this conversation. Yeah. I had to work through the wound quite young. Yeah, from like literally as long as I can remember, all through school, my friends, teachers, family, everyone.
Oh she talks so much. Oh she's so intense. Oh she's so dramatic. And then into high school a lot like often it was like intense, intimidating, just like non stop talking, Like if I try to talk to someone about a topic, I'm passionate about it, just like my speech never ends. Yeah, and and you know what, it's sorry, just quickly interect here. Oh she's so political, Like she's so opinionated. I always got the opinionating. Oh yeah, I was like, what would you rather me.
Not have opinion? Would you rather me not speak? Because that's kind of where you're leading with it, literally.
And that's what I got told. And even when it came to things like I think it must have been like fifteen, But this was a comment that I really had to work through, which is why I still remember. It was when my friends are talking about boys and all that sort of stuff, and I was like, oh, like, I've never had a boyfriend. And then someone made a comment about me being a bit of a handful, and then someone else was like, oh, just one, and I was like oh, and I'm like, but you know what
that's like, as in, like I'm a lot to handle. Yeah, Like I get it, and then someone okay, yeah.
But like what the like, I know.
Was such a random thing to happen, I know, And then that obviously stung. But obviously when I worked through that, I got to the point of if I'm two fucking handfuls, someone will love it, yes, And why would you not want so much of a person? I actually, I'm gonna quickly say something. So it's really funny because that's the comment that I get most in like me and Tim's relationship of like he's so easy going, he's so nice and blah blah blah, and she so spicy and such
a handful. Yeah, and but I like reflect them. I'm like, if he secretly didn't fucking love it. Do you think he'd still.
Be with me?
Mean, yeah, it's a choice he's made. He's clearly fucking getting off on it. Do you mean like he loves that energy? Otherwise he wouldn't be with me exactly?
And it's like there are.
People out there that, Yeah, he loves how spicy I am? Do you mean like that's and I think anyone that's a handful of the quote unquote handful.
Of course, they're like the best people ever so far. Why would you not want to be around them? Yeah, Like we don't do boring here.
No, But also that's such a and let's even reframe this conversation of if someone kind of says something that you almost thought was a strength of yours and.
They turn it into a negative.
Is such a reflection that I still take it as a compliment because I'm like, oh, I'm actually probably triggering them because I express myself so truly to who I am, and they probably aren't at the point where they maybe can yeah, or they maybe feel like they can be so direct, yeah, or they feel like they can, you know, because you will only shame or guilt someone if.
That triggers you.
Yeah, because if like I said, if you have like transcended that wound or whatever, then you're like, cool, I'm not too worried that she's off expressing herself, Like.
That's great, yeah for her exactly.
But it's if you don't express yourself how you would actually like ll that feels authentic to you, then you're gonna have a problem with other people doing it. M I love that. It's like almost remembering that whatever they say to you or call you too much of is a reflection of their triggers, but taking the responsibility of if it's triggering you, then there's something you have to work through. Because people should be able to say whatever
they want and it shouldn't affect you. Yeah, because now when people tell me I'm intense, I'm like, thanks, thank you, put the summer remind yeah, put this on my report literally, And that's even that's such a great point to you. Is also there is also a conversation to be had.
For example, if it is someone I love and care about, I will have that conversation with them that like, for example, me and Cooper have conversations all the time where I express to him, you know when you say this about me, it reflects to me that you actually mean this or you see me as this, and that can be helpful
to me. And then he can be like, oh, I actually, you know, I didn't realize I was doing it, or you know, he brings in his piece and we have a really clean conversation about it about hey, that's actually like I actually don't appreciate when you say that to me, or I think you can have that conversation, it's actually like, oh no, you actually don't get to say that to me.
We don't have to normalize this conversation, especially if it is with someone that you care about or you want to see again, because it's like, oh no, that's all you want to see, you know, if you have to see them, yeah you're cut off.
Sorry, I'm actually not seeing you again.
But one hundred percent, like if it is just like a fleeting comment or it's like you know, I do go into the oh, I'm not going to take this personally.
And also I'm going to.
Use this as awareness, like if someone does call me too much or direct, I'm like, oh, I do really get my point across quite quickly. And then I use this as self awareness for my identity and my concept of self and I'm able to have discernment on not letting their quote unquote negative like reflection or trigger taint me. Yeah, but also one hundred percent if it is something that triggers me, it's like, oh, there's actually something here I probably need to just look into a bit more, you know.
I have a question. Yeah, So, say someone is working through this too much wound and someone around them triggers it, or maybe they've recently worked through it, someone makes the comment it doesn't trigger them, But say it's their boss that makes that comment, would you or would you not tone that aspect of yourself down around that person? Because for me, I'm sort of in two minds on you should never especially if you've worked through the wound, you
should just let the comments go. But also it's like a professional environment, does it sort of come into that, you know what I mean? Yeah, that's actually such a great point. I think it is a little bit different around a professional environment because you know, there's having that self awareness piece of not everyone works the way you do. And that's even that's a conversation that I have for myself constantly because I come from two parents who.
Are really sensitive.
Yeah, and I'm like not, So we do have to sometimes be conscious of the way I speak to them or how I bring things up, and it's my delivery. Yeah, and I do because I love them and I do know they are sensitive and I love that about them. Yeah, so I am going to make sure my deliver free is a certain way because I can be quite direct and sometimes a bit hostile and that that is me.
But also having the self awareness of I guess that's emotional intelligence, yeah, of being like, you know, there are certain people it's just even like me a tier of how I speak to you and the R and C team like pretty fucking direct, but also like that's such like a mutual I would hope that and if anything ever, you know, was not okay, that you would have the conversation with me. Yeah, but it's like my conversation does
change with other employees. And I think that's about me having discernment and self awareness of their communications and what they need and what, you know, even where they're at in their journey. Yeah, And I think that comes with mistakes and learning and realizing and also having that like emotional intelligence, And I don't think it's about toning it down, but Also it is a good way to be like, oh did I maybe deliver that in a could I
delivered that in a different way for this person? But again, it's having that conversation with yourself and running through and having discernmented and being like, you know, you can still
be true to yourself. And this is actually I'm gonna bring my what I wrote down back in because this is a good thing of like, I actually went through something recently where I had to make a hard decision in between two different things and I don't really want to go into details, and there was kind of the result that making this hard decision, which felt really integral to my goals, my priorities and who I want to be, would maybe quote unquote look not so great to other people, right,
and even going into that you know that direct or whatever that concept is. But it's like I had to lock into the feeling and also like how it feels for me? So rather than how do I look to the people, it's like, how does this.
Feel for me? Yeah? Because I think sometimes.
Like ex certainly it doesn't matter if you think I'm too much or I'm to this or I'm to that. Yeah, as long as I'm okay internally, I can hold that, And I think that's what you have to lock into, Yeah, of like, am I actually okay with myself? You have to have the self trust, yeah, And having that self trust of even going through that process that I just did, and then also holding if someone does think I'm too much or I'm too direct, is that gonna like fuck up my whole day?
Is that gonna just regulate me?
Is that gonna like you know, And then being like I probably can't get through life if that did, because it would just happened all the time, do you know what I mean? So true, It's also like it's realizing but also taking into account obviously I'm not here fucking yelling at everyone and being a horrible person. Yeah no, but this is I swear, I'm really nice. She literally is the nicest person. Everyone speaks like, oh my god, pour a tear. But it's like, I'm okay to hold
how some people might see me externally because I'm okay internally. Yeah, and prioritizing that, Yeah, And I think I would rather be okay internally rather than it look a certain way externally to someone but secretly be fucking crumbling inside. Oh. So true.
Do you know what I mean? Did you see that difference?
Yeah? And that's what you guys need to lock into.
I love it. And on that note, we're done. Love you guys for much.
With the directed and I swear I'm nice and I love you.
Please please like mere.
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