Hi, and welcome to the Rise and Conquer Podcast. I'm your host, Georgie Stevenson. I am a lawyer, tend health coach, social media influencer, wife and dogmam. On the Rise and Conquer Podcast, we dive deep into all things mindset, habits, career, health, relationships and more. This is a podcast for women who want to rise up to be the best version of themselves, who have big dreams in who are willing to put
in the work to get there. I want to bring you the tools and actionable steps to feel confident in yourself, inspired to take bold action, and motivated to conquer your goals. Are you with me, your friends, Let's rise and conquer.
Hi, guys, welcome back to the Rise and Conquer Podcast. It is your host, Georgie Stevenson. So today we are getting into the whole self comparison and I want to talk to you guys just some tools that I use personally to stop comparing myself to others and to flex that self love muscle that I know we all have.
And the reason why this has come up and I wanted to talk to you guys about this is I at the start of the week have experienced some mad feelings of comparing myself to others, which made me feel really uncomfortable because I thought this was something I already dealt with, and obviously, not comparing your others and self love and self acceptance is not a final destination. It is something that we have to constantly work on. So
let's back it up a little bit. I am currently in Sydney, which is in our flight from my hometown Brisbane. I'm down here on a business slash work trip. I'm here with a brand called jym Shark, which I collaborate with. I suppose you would call me an ambassador or athlete or that sort of thing, and they're an amazing brand.
They are an online.
Active way company if you don't know who they are, and they put on these pop up stores where you can come and you can shop, and they also fly in certain athletes that they have under the brand and people get a chance to meet them. So I'm doing that this weekend. It is currently Friday, and I've actually been in Sydney all week because it's pretty cool. They fly you in the week before and we've actually just been doing a lot of team stuff. So we did
a team photo shoot with the other Aussie athletes. I met all the American and the UK, and there's even athletes here from Canada. So it's been a really cool week. But and this is me just being totally real and raw and honest with you guys. So I'll paint a little picture for you. At the start of the week. The first day was a photo shoot day, and this was with the other Bussy athletes, and I was with this other girl. Her name's Morgan, shout out to Morgan,
and she is an amazing handstander and gymnastic girl. She does handstands and gymnastic and she can bend and flip and do these really cool things. And she's obviously beautiful, has an amazing body. She's really cool. Also, she's one of those girls who can hang with the guys, and she has so much confidence and she's just really cool.
I was like straight away attracted to her personality. So she was there and she was lovely, and then all the guys were there, and a lot of the guys can do cool stuff like flips and handstands and all that sort of stuff, so it was really cool. So the first day we did the lifestyle shoot and then we also went clar diving. So because these guys are like extroverted and adrenaline junkies, I swear, and so they're like, let's go cliff diving, and I was.
Like sure, and so I did it.
And I totally went cliff diving because I honestly felt like I had to prove myself because I just have no mad skills like they did.
And so we did that and it was a really amazing day.
But something I did notice, and it's really weird, because I have done a lot of work on myself and I feel like I'm really confident and I'm really secure in the way that I feel about myself and who I am.
But it's really weird.
I kept having these feelings of comparing myself to these amazing people and basically feeling like they were better than me, and I was less because I couldn't do these amazing handstands or stuff like that. Something I did notice I was comparing myself a lot with is I'm actually, at heart a bit of an introvert. So even though I can get on you Tube and Instagram and I have a really bubbly personality, I definitely get my energy from
not necessarily being alone. But I'm just not extroverted. So I can definitely bring a presence and have a bubbly personality. I'm just not overly extroverted, and I'm.
A little bit shy. I'm not gonna lie. These people. They're all either really big.
On Instagram or YouTube or just have really big presence and you could really tell it in their personalities. So I was feeling like I kept comparing myself to these amazing people, and I kept telling myself because I couldn't do these cool skills, I.
Wasn't a real athlete.
And because I wasn't extroverted and really out there and bobbly and loud, I wasn't good enough. And it's really weird because I would feel these feelings and I was just kind of pushing them down and ignoring them because I kept saying to myself, like, when are you doing your job? You're confident, you're secure, you love yourself, it's all good. Why are you even thinking like this? So I just push the feelings down because you know, when you feel feelings and you maybe act a different way.
I didn't want that to happen because this is my bonding time with these amazing people, So I pushed the feelings aside when I got back to my room later on, and just a couple of days later, I think the next day I had a free day, I sort of just sat with them. And at first I was really annoyed at myself. Like I said, I would consider myself very confident and someone who doesn't compare themselves to others and feel less or anything like that.
So I was.
Annoyed that I was even feeling these feelings. But I decided to sort of just sit with them, and I have a couple of tools that I do use when I feel like I'm comparing myself to others and it's affecting me, And so I went through a couple of these tools, and after that, I felt so much better and I was just like, oh, almost like a relief went through me and I was like, oh, it's all good.
And then the next couple days, I didn't think once about comparing myself to someone else or feeling less than because someone had this amazing skill or something different to what I have. So I just wanted to go through some of the tools I use when I'm feeling that self comparison creeping in because I know you guys may feel this feeling too, and it's really easy.
Oh my god, guys. On a side note, this is so funny.
Obviously I'm a podcast so you can't see me, but I'm sitting here at the protail desk in my room and I'm like, my hands are going everywhere because I just like to speak.
My hands and anyway, so hard to note.
And yeah, so I just wanted to go through some stuff that I went through to make myself feel better. I know that self comparison it can just sort of creep in, even if you are a very confident and self aware person. It is so easy. It's especially easy on these days with social media and all you see is mostlyeople's highlight wheels and these perfect lives, so it's very easy to fall in this comparison trap. So I don't think I'm even going to go too much into
the social media side of things. I have dealt a lot with that, and I don't compare myself to anyone on social media these days anymore because I worked through a lot of that previously. It was so shocking to me because I have done a lot of work on that, and then to feel these feelings in person with other people.
I just haven't really.
Felt like that before, so I was just a bit blown away, and it was actually good because it did make me realize that we have to be constantly working on ourselves and constantly practing self love and self compassion on ourselves. So anyway, let's get into it. I did want to say that don't be upset or annoyed if you are comparing yourself to others. I think it's great to sort of be self aware and apply these tools
that I'm about to tell you. But something you do need to realize is comparing ourselves to others is a natural instinct. If you think about it, back in prehistoric times, it would be our natural instinct to analyze others and identify possible threats and that sort of thing. So we would be constantly comparing ourselves to others back in prehistoric times.
But I guess it's super.
Hard in this day and time because we do have things like social media and these highlight reels, and it's very easy to fall in the self comparison trap. Okay, so one of the first tools I use I think about, instead of comparing myself to this person, that I'm comparing myself to I compare myself to who I am today to who I was yesterday.
Or in the past.
And I think this is a really great mind shift because if you think about it, we are forever growing, forever learning and for other achieving different things. So instead of focusing on something that we are not because we're comparing ourself to someone else, I try and shift the mindset and I think, to myself, am I the same person that I was a year ago or even a week ago? And the answer is no, because I constantly am growing and learning and achieving, and we all are.
And I think it's very easy to fall into this track where we think we're moving too slow or we're not achieving enough, because we're surrounded by a social media and these highlight reels where everyone seems like they're just
killing it a life. So I think it's really important to do a bit of a mind shift and focus on yourself, block out those outside ideals that we should constantly be achieving sort of thing, and so I will look at myself and go, hey, I am learning and I am achieving things, And so I will look and celebrate my own successes rather than looking at someone else because let's be honest, you don't know how they got there, what they did to get there, You don't know any
of the backstory, so you cannot compare yourself. But you do know your own backstory. You do know yourself. So if you're going to compare yourself to anyone, it should be yourself. So I like to do that. It's just a small mind shift. You think about it, and obviously, you know, sometimes we may not be in the place we want to be or progression wise, but this is where self compassion comes in. And think about the challenges that you have faced and you're still here, you're still fighting,
and often we overlook those little things. So that's my first little tip. I basically went through and I was like, hey, yeah, these people are amazing, they can do amazing stuff. But also I am amazing. I've done amazing stuff, I've gone through crazy challenges and I am super proud of myself. The next thing I love to use, and this is realizing that the people that you're comparing yourself are not flawless.
So I have this rule where on social media I actually unfollow anyone who if their life looks like too perfect and they don't show anything real, I will literally unfollow that person because to me, I'm like, I don't need that shit in my life. I don't need that fakeness basically because to me, I want to be surrounded.
By real, inspiring people.
And don't get me wrong, I think it's amazing that, you know, people celebrate their achievements and they put it there highlight reel and their best movements and all that sort of thing. I think that's perfectly okay, but also make sure you're following accounts where they are also showing you their challenges, showing you the not so glamorous life.
And so basically I will literally unfollow or just not associate myself with anyone else who just doesn't show that sort of thing, because I did find at one stage that was really something that.
Would get to me personally.
So that's another thing is you also would realize a lot that you tell people, a lot that you put on social media, we all do it. We show a highlight reel, we show the good stuff. Basically, no matter how perfect someone else seems, we all know real life is messy.
Raw, and it's flawed. We all know this.
So I personally like I said, don't even follow people accounts that don't you anything like that. But it's just common knowledge that people are not perfect. You've just got to realize that. And that's actually another thing this week being with these amazing people throughout the week. Like I said, I've been here since Monday, and I got to know more of their life more in depth, and they have been through challenges. There's definitely non glamorous things about their lives.
And so when we see people initially and we first talked to them, or we first see them on Instagram or social media, you need to take that with a grain of salt and make sure you are refreshing your mind and telling yourself.
No one has the perfect life.
There's always going to be messiness behind closed doors, and that's okay, and we all know that. So basically realizing that what you may be comparing yourself to, they will have their own challenges and they will have their own issues, so it's okay, there's not even any point of comparing yourself to that person because they have challenges, they have
issues too. Okay, this is the last little tool I'm going to give you guys, and this is probably my favorite, So I probably listened to it on a podcast or I've read it somewhere, and it said, when you have a feeling, you only actually feel it for ninety seconds and then it passes.
And I just remember being like mind blown by that.
But then since I've been aware of it, I could not agree more So something that I like to do and something that I definitely did this week when I brought up these feelings, like I said, like push them down, and then I brought them up again in my room.
And I really love the practice of affirmations. So affirmations are basically just like sentences and words you say, I personally say them out loud and you just repeat and you probably don't believe them at the start, but you honestly just repeat them enough until you almost believe them. And basically, an affirmation is just like the action or the process of affirming something. So you are affirming something
to yourself. So basically what I do and will call this tool like basically you are loving and you're accepting yourself as you are right now. And if you think about it, this little voice in your head that tells you that you're not good enough to this person or anything like that, it's a natural instinct, and it's basically yourself identifying areas where you think you may be falling behind,
and it can be really cruel to yourself. So basically what I do is I just accept myself for who I am, and I do this amazing practice of affirmations. Something that I did at the start of the week is when I got back to my room. This is actually an affirmation that I say all the time, and I'm just in.
Love with it.
I think you need to find affirmations and words that really speak to you and you feel a motive when you say them or hear them, Otherwise it's not really going to work personally. This sentence really speaks to me, and so I've always used it, and so I use the affirmation no one is me and that is my power. So I will sit there, I make sure it's silent, I turn my phone on airplane mode, and I sit there kind of like I'm meditating, and I will say to myself, no one is me and that is my power.
And I will say it for around two minutes. I go off that ninety second and it's basically until I feel the feeling of comparing myself and jealousy and not feeling good enough to pass through me. And then I stop saying it. So I'll sit there and I'll say, no one is me and that is my power. No one is me and that is my power. No one is me and that is my power. And honestly, guys, after I feel that sort of feeling go through me, it's like this sense of relief and I always feel
so much better. And I just love that saying, like it is so true accepting yourself and realizing that your imperfections and what you are makes up you and that is your superpower. Like that is your power. And so even though I'm looking at what I am not and what I wish, maybe I could be taking it back and really talking to myself and being like, I am so special. Everyone is so different and how amazing is that? Like, honestly, imagine how boring life would be if we were all
the same. No one is you and that is your power. That is what makes you you. That is what makes you special, and you need to embrace it. And honestly, it's taking me years to embrace it, but I finally am and it feels good.
And when I.
Say that affirmation to myself. Like I said, it just honestly transforms the way I'm feeling and it just makes me feel so much better. And it's like I just I need to say it, and then I'm like, oh, okay, I'm all good now. And then basically I use some of those tools. Honestly, it was mostly the last one. I did want to include the other two tools just because I use them also, But after that I felt such a sense of relief. And then I noticed the whole entire week, I met way more athlete and new
people and I did not compare myself once. That's just to me, I'm like wow, because that's how I usually feel like. I usually feel like confident, and basically I've done the sort of self work where I have just loved and accepted myself and I.
Love being in that place.
And so it really upset me and I was annoyed at myself when I felt those feelings of I wouldn't say jealousy, but I just definitely was comparing myself and I was feeling less.
Because of it.
And it did make me realize that confidence and self acceptance and self love is definitely a muscle. As I say, like, it's something that you constantly have to be working on. It's not an end destination, and I think it's just really good to realize that. And I think it definitely does get easier. Like I said, I don't usually feel that way, but I don't think it ever just completely goes away. These feelings will creep back in every now
and again in situations. This is why you have these tools that I've just spoke about, and make sure you sort of seeing like it really depends what sort of makes you feel a certain emotion, So try them out, have a little play. What works for me won't necessarily work for you, but you will sort of realize as you are more aware of them and you have a feel for them and all that sort of stuff. So I think it definitely gets easier, but it definitely doesn't
go away. So make sure you are utilizing these sorts of tools. And I think another thing is I think it's great to be okay with these feelings. Like I said, I was almost like a bit annoyed at myself for feeling like this, but then I was like, you've got to practice self compassion and be like, oh, it's okay. I know you've done the work and I know you think you're really confident and you love yourself and you've practiced self love and all that sort of thing. And
it doesn't mean I'm going backwards. It means I'm only human. It means I'm only human for feeling these feelings and it's okay. So I am gonna wrap this up. This was just like a short and sweet episode. I love talking to you guys about stuff that I'm currently experiencing.
I just feel like it just feels better for me, and I feel like this is definitely something that you guys could probably resonate with, and I felt it could help you because, like I said previously, I've definitely dealt with a lot of feelings of feeling less and just
constantly comparing myself and it's a really crappy feeling. So I hope if you ever feel like this, or if you're currently feeling like this, make sure you are using these tools, seeing what works for you, and just putting an even into your daily practice and seeing how you go. I personally like to say affirmations every single day, not necessarily when.
I'm just feeling that emotion.
I like to say them every single day, even when I'm feeling like really good, and I don't necessarily need them, because I think it's really great your affirmations with affirming things. So I think it's really great to use them, not just necessarily when you need them or in negative or bad times, but just to be constantly using them even in the positive times, and I feel like it just gets easier and it just feels better. So I am going to wrap this episode up now, and I hope
this resonated with you. If this did, If you like this episode, make sure that you screenshot check it on your story, tag Rise and Conquer Dot podcast Instagram and tag me if you want at Georgie Stevenson and I love to repost anything that you put up. And also, if you think that like a friend, like a girlfriend, or any family maybe needs this little pep talk I'll call it, make sure you pass on this episode to them because that would be really lovely.
And sharing these sorts of.
Messages with people you love who may need it could literally change that day, so make sure you do that too. I hope you have a lovely day or night whenever you're listening to this, and I will talk to you guys soon.
Bye now.
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