G’s hotline ☎️ Where do you cross the line?

The Rising Conquer Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of the land which this episode is being recorded, the yugen Bear region. We further acknowledge country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and terrest Raid Islander peoples today. Hello and welcome back to the Rise and Conquer Podcasts.

This is the podcast for ordinary.

People who want to do extraordinary things. Hello and welcome back to the Rise and Conquer Podcast. It is your host, Georgie Stephenson and guys. Back to our regular programming. I do want to apologize for the quality of this intro clip. She has not yet mastered Mum and Business Life and I rushed home for Ivy Girl and I was yet to record this intro, So poor Jamie has to deal with a voice note and she's just got to make it sound good.

So the rest of the episode is higher quality. Do not stress.

But I am back with another geez hotline. So today we are answering some saucy qs. We have the question of how to make a decision when you're at a crossroads, should you tell your friend if you find out their boyfriend cheated on them? And also we hear about a very wild divorce toory situation as always a tear and I provide our unqualified but very enthusiastic opinion on these questions. You guys know Fridays, it's a bit of fun. But before we get into the episode, I did want to

But it's just basically about.

A family of family lawyers, so that all women. As you guys know, I used to work in family law. So I don't know, I'm just like so attracted to this TV show. I think the reason why I like it is because all the characters are just real people.

They're just I don't know, they're just real.

People and very entertaining a lot of drama, but it just it feels very real. Yeah, I don't know, I love it. It took a little bit to get into it, but I'm really into it now. And I just I love anything with like a lot of drama. There's cheating and just a lot happening, and I I just love drama that's not in my life. So that is a new show that we have been watching. I'm also reading

But guys, I hope you enjoy this.

Potty and I will chat to you in our next episode.

Let's get into it.

My friend is getting a divorce. Nothing bad happened and they haven't been married too long. It just seems they got married very quickly. So she's planned this entire divorce party weekend where she expects us to pay more than we did for her hands to go away for the weekend and party to celebrate the halfway mark of her divorce. It wouldn't even be completed yet. She's also doing things like printing shirts with his face and the rude finger.

The next thing. What do I do what? That's why I didn't want you to read.

That's fucking crazy.

I love this question so much. It's just a mess. Oh my god. So first of all, I think your friend's going through a lot.

I think, yeah, to you know, to.

Get divorced and just to have a child, and it's like a lot is happening there, and there's just like two sides to the story.

So I'm going to just say my first kind.

Of react, yeah, is I think it's inappropriate how she's acting, especially if nothing you know, quote unquote bad has gone on and she's like printing his face on t shirt. It's just a bit disrespectful when it's like that's the father of your child and you know there could be mutual friends and that sort of side of it and almost I don't know, I just get like immature vibes. Yeah, absolutely, like just super immature. This is like something a thirteen

Like this and lends you like just a bit crazy? Yeah, which she could be, That's what I thought.

I'm like, she's like a little bit Yeah, that's like I think you just need to go. Hey, look, I just don't really feel comfortable, you know, paying all this money. I would just be in front when they're and just be like, you know, I've got stuff and stuff going on. This money needs to go elsewhere. Also, it just makes me feel a bit uncomfortable, like how hard you're going with this? You know, like it just it feels uncomfortable.

Would you go?

Look, it depends if it was like my very best friend, I'd probably still go. If it was just like a girlfriend, I'd be like, oh, look, sweety. But in saying that, if it was my very very best friend, I'd also be like, you're being fucking crazy, Like.

You'd have the argument prior to the ape, and I'd be.

Like, we're not having a doors And then first of all, I'd be like, let's wait till it's fully over.

Why are we doing this halfway?

Because don't get me wrong, I would be happy to have a divorce party with a girlfriend if she has been through a lot and it's finished and it's like.

Yeah, but even if like there hasn't been bad things happen and there's still a divorce involved, that is something that not celebrate, but like go out for drinks with the girls, have a nice night, have a girl's night.

Yeah, I honestly think a divorce party is fine. Yeah, I don't have any issues with that, but I think it's, yeah, the way she's going about it, and it just seems.

It seems to be a little bit toxic. Yeah, to get that toxic vibes. Yeah, very toxic. But I feel a bit.

Judgy saying this because even though this friend is like he was fine, you know, blah blah blah, it's like, do we really know what happened in the relationship.

Yeah, but like it says he that she lied to him about being on birth control and that's why they had a kid.

Ye.

Crazy vibes.

But also yeah, look, and then also I just want to make a comment this person being like she's on Tinder and sleeping around, good honor.

I have no she's with that.

It's like she's single, she's allowed to do that. I don't know, I'm getting kind of vibes of this person being like a bit judgy about that.

Yeah, since they've been separated, she's been going on tender and sleeping around, which is fine, But he hasn't done any of that. So I'm not sure what to do about.

How does this person know he hasn't done that? Point? Do you mean I don't know this question's weird.

I completely get this question how she's feeling, and it's all just feeling like.

Probably just like she wants to protect her friend. Yeah, because there's probably a lot of mutual people involved, if they've been married and had a child.

I think you need to have a serious conversation with her, face to face and sit her down and just say this is feeling like a bit toxic. Like, I understand you've got a lot of feelings about this, and I'm so happy to celebrate with you once the divorce is over if that makes you feel better, but also I feel like this is kind of.

The wrong way of celebrating.

Yeah, I think, well, just at the moment, the divorce isn't even final. You know, you're going to the extent of doing T shirts and just you know, it's a lot like, let's have a serious conversation because you're obviously going through a lot right now.

I love that. Okay, here's a work one. Okay, a job one.

I'm at a bit of a crossroads with work. I love my job, my team and the work we do, but I've applied for another job that's at a dream organization because I thought why not and have moved to the next round of interviews. In this same week, I found out from my current work that this same organization has hired me and my team to do a dream project for them. I'm feeling quite stuck between the two places. On the one hand, I love my job, but on

Oh? My god? Yeah? Like, I'm like, is that complict of interest? Well, I'm almost a bit confused here.

So she's saying where she currently works is doing a job for that dream place she applied for.

Yeah, that's what I got. So she randomly applied for this dream organization. She's now made it to the next round of interviews, and in that same week she's found out from the current organized job.

I get it.

Yeah, but why they hired her team to do something?

But why can't she do that project while she's still going through I think she could? Ah?

Is she saying she's saying, do I just stay I don't want this job anymore? Or like okay, I It sounds like she's pretty confident she'll get the job.

Yep, so she needs to make a decision. Let's just go off that. Okay. When I'm making a decision, a tiya, you know, I asked my journal.

I have this like joke guys that in the project, when I need an answer for something, I literally like right in my journal the question and I like meditate on it until the answer comes. But that's that's a very personal process. But when I'm making a decision, I honestly go what was the very first gut instinct? So like, don't go and poll everyone, don't go and ask a million people. I almost am just like what was the

Eat your live? Yeah?

And I think with stuff like this, I look at it as there's a reason you saw that ad wait, did you maybe see it on Instagram?

Or were you on seek? Why were you on seek? If you love your job, that much. Yeah, why did you even apply?

Like, yeah, what pulled you to apply for this job? If you love your job? Why did you go to the interview if you love your job so much? Because it's like, if you truly knew you were in the right place, you never even would have been in the position to look at that ad. And if you looked at it, you would have sort of scoffed at it and been like, I don't need that.

I'm in the right place.

One hundred percent. I feel like she's already made the decision, Yeah, don't you absolutely Otherwise, why would you even go for the interview?

Yeah? And why would you put effort into the resume? And also it's kind.

Of the vibes of how I was saying the other day at TEO of like, my previous life was fine. There was nothing bad about it. It was fine. But now you know me seven years ago it was fine. But now me actually making those hard decisions and making taking risks and whatnot, I'm like, holy shit, life is like better than I could have imagined exactly. And I think think she.

Kind of has that niggling feeling.

Yeah, And I think as well, is you might just have some I call them graduation goggles.

Or like rose colored glasses on.

Where when you know something's coming to an end, you just all the bad floats out of your mind. Yeah, and you just think it's the best place to be time. Yeah.

I will never go back to UNI.

Literally, right, Like, when you graduate UNI or you graduate high school, you like, I've had the best time.

I never want to be so bad. Yeah, and then you leave and you're like, god, that was terrible. Yeah, thank god, I'm out of that place exactly.

Love.

So I think there might just be some of that going on too.

Yeah, And I think it's okay, Like you can mourn what you currently have and you can still like it and still want more for yourself.

Absolutely, And I wouldn't stay at this current job just because you've now got a project to do for the dream organization when you literally could just that could be every single day for you, not just a period of time.

Yeah, amazing, quit your job, do it. Girl.

I can't tell you how, but I found out through a trusted source that my friend's boyfriend cheated on her.

What do I do? Oh my god, you fucking tell her? Okay. My first initial reaction is mine's like, what did you? And people say what a doll?

Do?

Men are trash? This is my thoughts on this.

Tell us how close of a friend because my my opinion when it comes to stuff like this is interesting because no one ever wants to be the person to tell them, but everyone would want someone to tell them.

And how does that work?

Yeah, because like if I found out and I didn't see it first, point a doubt? Yeah, because did that actually happen? Is this person being over dramatic? Is it misinterpreted? Yeah, but you've also said trusted source, So I assume that you know that it's happened, But then it's the message. Is always a person that gets yeah.

Sure.

So my opinion is similar in regards to if it is a close friend, someone you value, I think you have to tell them because if they were ever to find out that you knew and they didn't, that would be a deal breaker for me as a friend. Oh absolutely, that would be a complete deal breaker. I'd be like, I don't care if you weren't. For sure, you should have told me.

Yeah.

I would expect that from my closest friends, and I would one hundred percent do that for all of my closest friends.

Yeah, but it is kind of hard because if it's just kind of like a friend of a friend, I actually have a confession, Oh my god, I've actually been in a situation where I know someone I am not close friends. But it's like, if I saw them out, I would say hi and have a chat with them, and I know about their life and I do know for a fact that you know their partner did cheat on them.

That's so hard.

But for me, I did not feel like it was my place and also all my business, do you know what I mean?

Like it felt to me like it was a.

Bit almost like immature to be inserting myself in someone else's business when I really do not have any ties with them, Like this is a person. If I never saw them for the rest of my life, it wouldn't matter. I'm not close with them like someone from high school kind of thing. Yeah, like more of like friend of a friend vibe. But oh okay, yeah yeah, And so

Person's then going to go to that person? Are you then just creating gossip? Yeah, that's what I was just gonna say, Like, I think it needs to go directly to that.

I would go directly to them, and I would say, Like for all my close friends, I would go to them, whether I was one hundred percent sure or not, I'd be like, oh, this is what i've heard, let's work through it.

One hundred and ten percent.

But if it's someone I'm kind of close with that I've had a personal relationship with at any point in time, I would never I don't think i'd go to their best friend and say it, because if I was going to go to their best friend and say it, I might as well go to them and say it, because you know their best friend's going to be like a tear told me that this person told her this.

Yeah, I get what you mean, true, And I.

Would just go one if and with people like that might sound a bit rude to me to say, but if they decide to cut me out, because I'm the messenger who Can'm fine with it because at least I've helped them.

So if it was someone that's like not a close friend, but it's just like a friend.

Would you do it if it's a friend of a friend, Yeah, definitely not Ye, not my business.

That's how I felt.

Yeah, because if it's someone i've met through someone at their birthday party, Yeah, thing I use the vibe.

Yeah, I just feel like it's too far. Yeah, not my business. Yeah. But then it's also like it's ekey, it's eky, because I would feel I would be so upset if someone did that to me. Yeah, like if I'd be like someone.

You spoke to my face exactly, I didn't tell me. Yeah, maybe I wouldn't go out of my way to tell them. Oh no, See, this is what I mean.

It's hard because it's like how do we even initiate that conversation?

And I'd hate to do it like over the gram or something.

I'd just message them and be like, hey, I've just heard something from.

Actually I'm going to take my answer back, and I'm going to say if I was a hundred percent certain, like I saw it myself with my own eyes, one hundred percent, I would go to that person.

Yeah, no matter what if you saw it. But if I just heard it on the grapevine. I wouldn't you.

Just disregard it as a roomy I just like, oh, yeah, then i'd tell my best friend.

In that. This is actually another question here, Yeah, I actually do you ever like if someone comes to you and goes, I have a secret, do not tell anyone?

And this person's just whatever? Do you just like a random person? No? No, no, so like not your best friend.

Well, just anyone comes to you they have a secret or whatnot. So let's just say it to me. Let's say I come to you and I have this like secret, and I'm like, do not tell anyone? Do you then go and tell either like who are you close to in your family? Your mom's do or like are you really close with your best friend? Very Do you then go and tell your mom or best friend knowing it will never get back to me and they will never say anything.

It depends who it is and what it is. Usually, well just says the example me, Yeah, well.

Probably not because it'd be to do with work.

No, it's just something in my life, and it's like what your Mom'm gonna do?

I feel like if I feel the need to get it off my chest, yes, I'd tell my mom. Yeah, my mom's are pretty my mom's a vault. Yeah, Sollen, Yeah, I'm kind of the same. If like, there's certain people who I know if I told a secret, they would never tell anyone, and so I feel safe confiding in them, and I'm that person.

I'm like, I just got to tell you, and you know what.

Would my best friends, I'll tell them a secret of mine. I'm like, don't tell anyone, and then their mom's message.

Me about it.

Love, You're like, you sneaky bitch.

Oh my god, it's hilarious.

But that's fine because I'm like, my mum knows all your secrets.

Oh, that's really cute. You guys are sweet? All right? That was random? In conclusion, is what's your thoughts on the cheating?

To be honest, I'm at the point now where I'm like, if I saw it myself, I one hundred percent would tell no matter how close or far they are. If I knew them and I saw them, I'd tell them. Yea, if I've heard it through the grapevine. Close friends absolutely would tell. If I considered that i'd tell their best friend, I'd tell them straight. But if it's someone who I don't know that well, I'd actually probably tell the person

Couldn't couldn't have said it better myself. Yeah done.

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