Ep 158: Cultivating a New Perspective for a New Year

It's about having the clarity , self-confidence and unstoppable belief to go after and get everything you want . If you'll come with me , I'll show you how Well . Hello , friends . I hope you had an amazing week .

Today is Christmas Eve , so before I dive into today's episode , I wanted to wish everyone a wonderful holiday , and I hope that you're doing something amazing to celebrate with friends , family , people that are important to you , or if you're by yourself this season . I wanted to wish you the happiest of holidays .

You don't have to spend it with others to have a wonderful holiday season . I know this because I have spent a few by myself and I did not find them sad .

I found them to be kind of indulgent , if the truth be told , but I did want to use the potential angstful side of the holidays as a jumping off point for today's episode , and it was also shaped by a DM that I got this week from a listener who's struggling and that actually brought up some things of my own and it inspired me to create this episode , to

try to find a different way in to some things we've talked about on the podcast before , and I'm just going to call it perspective , a new perspective . And so let me just kind of talk about what the DM was first , because that was kind of the first little data point , and then it made me think about gosh .

It's the holidays , and the holidays are joyful but they can also be , depending on your life situation , sad . You know , I've talked about what my family is going through for the past couple years with my parents , and this is the first holiday without one of them .

You know we lost my dad in March of this year , so last holiday season was sad because we knew we didn't have long , and then this holiday is part of it is Part of it is I have a little melancholy , honestly , just being without them and I can't pick up the phone and call them . I can't go there . There's no big family gathering , right .

So it's just a season that we go through and it just made me think about people who might be going through stuff , and so I hope this episode helps you and if you have a friend that's going through maybe not so fun a season of life .

I would like you to share this episode with them because it might , might , change their perspective and it might inspire them to start working on the things they can control around their perspective . So I talk about , you know , on this podcast a lot , as you know if you're a regular listener .

We talk about how it's important to be very intentional , about you know what we're thinking and that we're in charge of that , and it doesn't always feel that way , right , it feels like , you know , our brain is in charge and it feels like the things that we think are just true .

But I want to talk about it through a different lens and I'm going to start with a couple of quotes from one of my favorite American lit authors . So it's a classic author and just think , ever since I was young , it took American literature in high school I just thought , wow , like this person was dropped in from the future .

To have the perspectives that he had in the era that he lived is insane . I think it's Henry David Thoreau who wrote beautifully but also with amazing depth about perspective . So the first quote I want to share from him is it's not what you look at that matters . It's what you see . I thought that was very true and very poignant .

But this one in particular blew me away because really he's getting into the science of neuroscience back in whatever era he lived in I think it was the 1700s . I mean it's like insane . So the quote is from one of his books as a single footstep will not make a path on the earth , so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind .

To make a deep physical path , we must walk the path again and again . And to make a deep mental path , we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives . I mean , how's that for some wisdom ? Right , and it's true . And I think sometimes when we talk about the power of our thoughts , some people can really dismiss it .

It feels really woo-woo , it feels not true . And that's kind of what I want to talk about on the episode today is why does it feel not true ? And it just feels like we're regurgitating platitudes from new age things or thought leaders or whatever . And I'm just saying it is not true .

There's a whole genre of science around how it's not true and that our thoughts really do shape our world and you know it . I'm going to read you a quote from a book called the Brain the Story of you , and it was written by a gentleman named Dan Eagleman , and I'll just read a paragraph from it , because it's also very important food for thought .

And he says here's the key the brain has no access to the world outside . It's sealed within the dark , silent chamber of your skull , and so your brain has never directly experienced the external world , and it never will .

Instead , there's only one way that the information comes from outside to get into the brain , and that is that everything that you experience every sight , every sound , every smell , every experience , everything that's said to you , everything , rather than being a direct experience of your brain , is an electrochemical rendition that takes place in a dark theater .

Right , this is an important distinction . Your brain isn't really experiencing your life , it is interpreting your life right Through what they're calling the electrochemical rendition that takes place in the dark theater .

It is about electrical signals that your brain receives , and I think it's just really important to know that each of us , because of who we were innately born , as coupled with our family of origin , we were born into our socioeconomic factors , our ethnic factors , our religious factors , the perspectives of our parents and their what the world they were born into .

It's like we are a product , in many ways by default , of our environment . That was programmed in . That doesn't mean it has to stay that way , but that is the first filter that gets put on our life .

Everything you experienced in your family of origin , in your world of origin , from zero to 18 , let's just take those first 18 years through school , the teachers you had , the community you were around , the activities you participated in , the family of origin , you had your birth order even . Right , I'm the third child of four .

I feel like that has had a profound impact . I'm a classic middle child . We can go one of two ways . We can either be up to mischief all the time and blowing our life up all the time , or we can become kind of a hyperachiever , and I chose the latter .

Right , very much a product of my birth order , the second daughter of three and the third child of four . Right , it's like I am right , squarely in the middle , but my brother is also in the middle , but he's the only boy , so his experience of being a middle child is very different , right ? Yeah , it's very true .

All of that stuff gets in our mind and it interprets how we look at our life , and so we think that you know the things that are happening in the world . We think they're just true . We think the political views we hold are the right political views and the political views that other people hold are evil .

I will not talk about the social posts that I just saw yesterday on Facebook , but I will say I did rethink how often I want that person to show up in my Facebook feed .

I am , as I said many times , I am right down the middle politically , and I think most of people are , but it's like the ones on the fringes really want the other ones on the fringes at least in America . They want them to be locked up .

It doesn't matter which fringe , by the way , it doesn't matter if you're on the right or the left , if you're very far on the side . You think the other one should all go to jail and then the world would be fine , which , of course , isn't a helpful thought , right ?

And it definitely is a triggering thought for me , because it takes me back to January 6th and all the crazy stuff that went on in America that still , to some extent , is going on in America that we could all live without , and I would say we're on the world right .

We look at the Ukraine , we look at the things going on in the Middle East , like we're all fighting with each other over our unique perspectives politically . And if we could just find a way to come to a happy medium . And that sounds like utopia and I know it will never happen .

But it's a shame because at the end of the day , at the end of the day , we are all entitled to our beliefs and there is a way for us to all find a way to live peacefully together . But probably will never happen as long as humans are involved , because we just we can't kind of get over it .

And it's really because we have this wiring and so we think that all of these experiences and sights and sounds and stuff that were wired in from the thing , they were not even conscious of them anymore . So it's kind of like what the quote from Henry David Thoreau was .

It's like in order to form a belief , we have to have , we have to think that thought so many times that it just becomes . It's like the path that a river follows . It's what I always talk to my clients about . It's like the river runs this way right now . Right , because that's the way it's always run .

That's the path that got carved in , and so that's the path the river of your thoughts follow . But what happens is that there is something in our brain called neuroplasticity . This is from the discipline of neuroscience , meaning that the human brain can flex and change and that we , as adults at midlife , have an ability to just decide new things .

We want to think honestly about anything , whether it be our beliefs on aging , or our beliefs on money , or our beliefs on old age , or beliefs on relationships or our beliefs on political views .

Like we can change our mind about anything , it requires us to decide on purpose what we want to think and to practice that thought again and again and again , through repetition , by catching yourself , by becoming aware of thoughts that you have , and that is where coaching is so helpful .

It has changed my life , like I teach my clients how to self-coach , because whether you're in my membership and we do group coaching once a week or whether you're working with me one-on-one I have a very small group of one-on-one clients . They're still only working with me a couple times a month , right , and yet we're living with ourselves every day .

So it's really important to learn the practices or a practice and , I think , a set of practices that can help you get the mindfulness you need to actually become aware of what's actually been programmed into that filter , because we just think it's true .

And the DM that I got this week was from a listener , a podcast listener , who is at midlife Whaley , centered in midlife . She is 54 and she lost her job earlier this year , so she described it as late spring , so let's just say April .

So it's been a while , and she's still , despite having applied for her she says hundreds of jobs and getting pretty far into the process with a number of them , she has not landed a job offer . And so her DM to me was full , as you might imagine , full of fear , full of resignation , uncertainty , lots of fear about .

You know , she's got one child in college , one child getting ready to go into college . In her mind she wanted to retire at 65 with a certain amount of money in the bank . She was needing to save aggressively to hit that thing . And now , of course , she's been unemployed for whatever eight months , and so she's moving in the opposite direction .

She's actually not saving because no money's coming in but she's tapping into those reserves and so , listen , that is scary for anyone who's been through a layoff

. It is not for the faint of heart and it happens . That old stereotype that it only happens to non performers is 100% false . I just learned of a team where the entire team lost their job . So mergers happen , redundancies happen , people get laid off and sometimes it's about your level . Sometimes the bigger your income , the bigger the target on your back .

Sometimes in some company cultures , some companies are , I think , a little agist and try to hide that . But if you just looked at the stats and their layoffs you'd see it's a lot of the high income earners they target . And sometimes they do that for reasons because maybe they got bloated and they need to thin out layers of management .

It's just , a business is just , it's just tough .

And I had a lot of empathy for this woman and I did encourage her to set up some time with me , free 30 minute session , just because I know I could give her some methods and some thoughts that would , you know , if she practiced those over and over again , would change her perspective on where she's at , because what I'm about to say you may or may not

agree with , and I very much hope that my response to her . I've not heard back from her yet , but I'm hoping that my response back to her did not feel like a platitude , because I know it can feel like a platitude when I say that you know how you're looking at it as a choice .

It can actually really piss people off when you're in a season of life that is not great . When people tell you that your perspective on that as a choice , it can feel like really . I'd like to tell you a few choice things . Right , it's just very it can be really really upsetting .

And I just want to say , though , that it is 100% true that , while I do and this is a my belief , so I could be wrong about this I do think that in general , at least in America , it is a youth biased society . I do believe that . However , I will also say that , as someone who is squarely centered I'm that , you know , close to that woman's age .

It's like it's , I believe it's changing . I mean , I kind of feel like it has to like . The ratio of youth to older people in our society is shifting , you know . There are more and more people , you know , approaching retirement age , which is sort of dangerous for some of our social government programs . But anyway , I'm not going to digress into that .

I will just say that I do think it's becoming a society where , because of the advances in healthcare , the advances in just the science of how we care for ourselves , like our skin care , the science of how we care for our bodies , even like our knowledge of nutrition and how we care for our bodies as we age , like it's it's all shifting and so , while I do

believe that there are some folks who can get hung up on age or overly fixated on age which , by the way , is illegal in the United States but during the hiring process , I think many people are not . And I know I don't think a thing about it , I just don't .

I don't think of a thing about it as it relates to people that I interview who are more experienced , or even the ones who are really just getting out of school . I am not a person who believes that .

I do think some things you learn through time and experience , but I do think it's the fresh perspectives of even the recent graduates who don't have any zero business experience , can be incredibly helpful . It's like a fresh perspective entirely can introduce questions and challenges to the way things are done in a business that can transform it .

So I just feel like it's shifting . But it's important for that person to believe that . Because if you believe that it's been eight months and I'm never going to get another job like the one I had , or I'm never going to get hired , I'm going to have to now work two or three jobs and it still won't add up to what I used to make .

And now I'm never going to be able to retire . All of the scary thoughts that this woman had that she needs to stop in their tracks and intentionally decide she wants to think something new . She has to do that because if you take that energy of what's the point , no one's ever going to hire me . They think I'm too old , I'll never get another good job .

All of that shows up in the way you tell your stories , the energy you bring to a meeting , just all of it , and that is the way that energy and the other person picks up on that vibe and it can start to make you seem tired , not passionate , not enthusiastic , and that , more than just your chronological age , will count you out .

People want to hire people who are going to bring energy into the business . So you have to adjust your energy . So it's not helpful to think a thought like no one's ever going to hire me which , by the way , is not true .

You know I have said many times this podcast , this business , is a business of passion for me and right now it's a side hustle and will continue to be for walks . I am not ready to give up on my brand path . It's been the brand strategy thing , has been a passion for me throughout my life . It's a vocation for me a bit .

And now to able to do that in the entertainment industry , yeah , I'm not ready , I can't give it up yet . So it's for me . My business is a careful balance of what do I have time for and how do I do this ?

Because it's really important for me to take all the experiences I've had , plus the coaching , training , and try to help people who are at midlife or even earlier on , if they do have some younger ones who are listening .

You know that is a passion for me , but I have to balance that with the very you know the realities of what time do I have to invest in it .

But I will say like it's not true , because this job that I got I just got a year and a half ago and I'm exactly that woman's age and it's the by far the highest paying job I've ever had , and I've been highly paid executive for a number of years , so and I still get calls from headhunters all the time .

So it is a belief system that she has and I get it . I understand where it comes from , but what she's thinking is a choice and I will say , like I have had . It made me think about some of my own things , and this is I'm going to share something funny and personal .

I think it's funny , but maybe it's not funny to others who might be listening , but it shows my own biases on age right . So , not too long ago , I had a don't don't judge me for this I had a , a I don't even know what you call it .

Um , I guess a matchmaker reach out to me and she did it in two areas not only on LinkedIn , but she also stalked me on Instagram and she wanted me to set up time with her because she had . I guess , I don't know . Guess she has a paid client who's paying to meet someone , and you know people do that . I blame them .

It's really hard out there to meet people and so I guess they were looking for a certain who knows . I never responded to her . Well , I , yeah , I never responded to her , but I will say , and I'll tell you more in a minute about why . Um , I will say that I was curious . I thought , oh , wow , the hackers are getting very creative .

So that shows an age bias . Because I thought no one , no matchmaker , in their right mind , is going to reach out to a woman my age or to me . You know what I mean .

I thought , maybe if I was 20 years younger , because I thought , well , if somebody's paying , however much they pay to a private matchmaker , they're perfectly capable of meeting any number of women .

They don't need to go find a woman in their mid fifties , because the ratios of women in their mid fifties who are single , like me , I thought you know it's like we're a dime , it doesn't mean so I don't know , like all of that they've said is full of my own biases about relationships and age and being a woman of a certain age , right .

So I went out and I researched them and her and she is legit . So that is a legitimate firm and they charge exorbitant fees for people to um find their match . So I don't know what she was looking for , why she felt so strongly that I was the person or even who her client is .

I just know that's not a place where I'm at right now in my life , but I will say it like when I was responding to the DM of the listener , it was so easy for me in the career realm to to believe and to see how the points of view of that you know listener were incorrect , because my own beliefs and experience of career are very different .

I could understand and empathize with why she would believe that , but I know it's not true . So it was very easy for me to sincerely encourage her on you know how to think about something differently . But what was interesting for me is that as I was doing that , I was thinking about gosh .

I hope , you know , when she gets this message she doesn't think that it's just a platitude or she doesn't get offended . I hope that she really considers it because it's just true . It instantly made me think about that first message from that hen heart , because when I got it I started laughing Like that was how deeply held my belief was that ?

What in the world , what in the world , you know ? And then , when I got it on Instagram too , I thought that doesn't even make sense to me and and it took a while for me to see , oh gosh , I really have some baggage around what it means to be a woman at midlife and finding relationships .

That's 100% my own biases and my own beliefs , and that's it's not something that I want to believe , right ? So I'm just I'm telling you all of that because those things that that are hardwired in our observations that we've made throughout our life , there are things we've experienced , their interpretations we've made and we have stored those away .

And then , when something happens , they get trotted out and we just believe that they're truths , they're just the way that the world works and they aren't . But it does take work and perspective for you to decide that you don't want to believe that anymore , like if it was for someone else , one of my clients .

I don't coach on relationships , but if one of my clients said to me , oh , I don't feel like I'll ever be able to meet a partner because I'm whatever 54 , 55 , I would be like , well , that's not true , you know . But it's funny because , while I can see that for someone else for myself . When I got that those messages I put .

This is ridiculous , like who is this hacker that is trying to collect my personal information to you know scam me ? And actually it was not . It was true , and so you know .

I'm just telling you all this because you have those things too and you might be aware of them , but you might be blind to them and you don't want to go through life , the rest of your life , thinking about things in a way that I guess we're programmed in by default , which is actually how the brain works .

It's like a I've said before , it's like a supercomputer and it's just running constantly . It's like not turning your computer off at night or whatever . It's like a . It's just always processing information and we're not aware of it .

And I , how I would describe it , is that that filter that goes all the way back to your family of origin when you were just a baby , and and actually goes to your parents' family of origin when they were babies and then their parents , like it's , we are all products of really all of the ancestors that came before us , unless , unless our parents really

consciously reshaped how they want to view the world , and I feel like very few people do that right , but I . What I want you to know is you can do it . It doesn't matter how old you are , it doesn't matter what area you're hung up on , whether it's money , beliefs . You know age and career , age and relationship or any of that . You can reshape it .

I'll tell you another story . So this one is from a woman in a social group that I'm in and she's also , you know , midlife and she's 54 . And she I just read this post yesterday . I thought it was amazing .

So she was talking about how , as she celebrated her 54th birthday in the past year , she was thinking about oh gosh , this is my last year before I'm my mid 50s she's like I'm not quite there yet and it made her think about how she used to think about what it would be like to be in her mid 50s , how she would look physically , you know , whether or not

she would still be fashionable , whether or not she would still look attractive in the way that she interprets being attractive . And she said that she had this realization that the way she used to look at the , the 50s , when she was in her 20s and 30s , was that it was all going to come to an end at 50 . And I can kind of relate to that .

I sort of thought so too and you know she's like . But what I've realized is that with the advances in in everything , really like she's like in science and prescriptions and you know our knowledge of , you know taking care of our bodies , like all of it . You know even the science of skincare and stuff .

She said we women in their 50s really can look quite youthful , you know , and like she , I don't know her . I've interacted with her a couple of times in the group but I don't know her personally . She looks quite youthful , like I would have not .

If she had not said her age I would have thought , oh she's , you know , probably you know 15 or 18 years younger , like I never would have guessed that she was mid 50s

. And she said she's got two daughters that are in their mid to late 20s and that what she started to do on her 50th , fourth birthday this year was she started to make go back to all of her pictures she's taken of herself and her life and her experiences from 50 plus and she's doing a scrapbook for her daughters by year .

And the entire purpose of the scrapbook , she said , is she wants to make sure that they don't get those thoughts wired in about , oh , it's all over by the time I'm 50 .

She wants them to take care of themselves , their bodies , their money , the every part , their relationships , every part of their life , knowing that there is no hard stop to it until you take your last breath , whether that last breath occurs at 50 or whether that last breath occurs at 100 .

Right , and we're all lucky to be living in this time period where they've unlocked the genomic sequence like they can I can't remember , but I think they can sequence , you know someone's DNA and like I don't know if it's a day or it's like not much , and you know it's all the super computing and equipment that's available to them now and what that opens is

that opens , I think , that whole thing . I'm not 100% sure , but I think that whole thing is what made the quick pivot into the COVID vaccine possible . Is that whole you know genomic sequencing and all of the learnings that have come out of that .

They were able to kind of center in on that part of they were to unlock the virus , I guess , and like figure out exactly what they needed to do in order to minimize the impact of the virus on the human body , and so you think about that as it relates to diseases that up till now have been without a cure .

Every day they're coming up with cures for those right . So not to go down a rabbit hole , but it's like , it's pretty amazing , and I think , when you think about the perspective of the rest of our life , can be the best of our life if we allow ourselves to believe it .

When you've , when you learn that everything that you think up till now has probably been by default , unless you've been very intentional about it , and that there is something in the human brain called neuroplasticity , meaning that we can choose new things to think , and if we're disciplined about practicing those thoughts and practicing believing those thoughts , those

thoughts can eventually become new beliefs and that new neural pathway that you intentionally formed by choosing that thought , you can enlarge and strengthen and that can become your new default way of thinking .

In that that same situation like my , my listener , who believes that she's never you know , at 54 , you know can't find another great job she can just decide , way before it even happens , to think something different , to believe that the best things are in front of her and that , even if it hasn't happened yet . She can practice believing that thought .

That is the energy she's going to take into it right and eventually that energy , that positive energy , is going to meet the right opportunity and it's going to happen for her , hopefully sooner rather than later . Same thing with my acquaintance in my , my private membership group . You know . She was talking about being 54 and creating this graphic for her daughters .

It's like she's trying very intentionally to set a new pathway for her daughters so that they don't have to undo the biases she had against aging . She doesn't want them to look at their 50s that way . She wants them to look at their 50s as when they'll be at their most powerful to date , which is very true , right ?

It's like everything you've learned your 50s can be in 60s , and even 70s , 80s can become your most powerful time of life . And I think we don't think about it that way . We think , oh , we hit some magic age of 45 , and then it's all . Now we're starting on the downhill slide . It's like , no , not unless you want it to be that way , you know .

And it goes back to the quotes from Henry David Thoreau . It goes back to the excerpt I read from you from Dan Eagleman , the Brain , the Story of you , that book , our life and our experience of it is our choice , and I think what I want you to know today is to bring it back to the holiday season .

You might be in a place where life is fantastic and that you're preparing to have an amazing celebration with the people that are important to you , or even if you're by yourself , you may be in a place where you're great with that .

You may also be in a place where your life doesn't really look so great in terms of what you're wanting or hoping for your life to be , and that is why I wanted to talk to you guys about the things I talked about today some perspectives on perspectives , because it is a choice and that is not a platitude .

And the thoughts you think every day create those electrochemical happenings in your brain and the energy of your thought if it's a positive thought , can , it can and will impact how you feel . The whether you know you feel optimistic or Sad , you know , is going to be Driven by what you're thinking .

So it's important to know what those thoughts are and to get in touch with them and I will say like , just like I told you that discovered I had when I responded to my listeners , dm and I , then it instantly took me to that outreach from them , that matchmaker , and like I thought , oh my gosh , like I really have some thoughts wired in , you know , about

Aging and relationships and women and and men , and I don't know those are not thoughts that are helpful . I don't even know where they came from and I just decided , okay , that's something I have to work on and I will just say you will , I believe , never stop having to do that .

There's never going to be a place , I Don't think that you get to in your life where you're not having to square up with some old Belief that got stored away . You don't even know when or where , where it came from .

Because if you , if a friend , were to ask you or , in my case , if a client were to ask me , I would be like , well , of course , that's not true .

You're , you can find a relationship at any age , because I believe that for someone else , but for whatever reason , I had that instant reaction when I got that , that message and so I'm just telling you they're there .

You may feel differently if you're encouraging a friend or a family member about the thing , but if you really Think about it as it relates to yourself , you may think well , that's true for them , but it's not true for me . Like we are always going to have to challenge old patterns of belief and thought , old perspectives .

And it gets back to what Henry David Thoreau said , as a single footstep will not make a path on the earth , so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind . To make a deep physical path , we must walk that path again and again . To make a deep mental path , we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives .

So catching that pattern of thought once and saying why don't want to think that ? I'm going to try to think this instead , isn't enough . That belief came from somewhere and it came from being hardwired in a long time ago .

So you're going to have to and the words of Henry David Thoreau To make a deep mental path , you're gonna have to think that new Thought that you want to be true over and over and over again , so that it becomes the dominant experience in your life . It is a choice and it doesn't feel like it . It feels like the thoughts that come up by default .

We just think are true . Like I said at the beginning , it's about people's you know , political biases . It's about people's age biases it's , but it's about . It's about the things that got wired in but then we weren't even aware Was a wiring was taking place .

You know , it was just an interpretation that we had of the world and then that got stored away and and now it's in there and you can rebuild a new pathway , but you have to be very intentional about it . So that is the perspective I wanted to give you today .

It's less of a Coaching session and more of a just some perspectives I wanted to share and some thoughts that I hope will challenge your own thoughts on what beliefs actually are and what the filter is that you have of your world , because If you are in a place today , that isn't great .

I Want you to know that you can be in an entirely different place next year , completely . If you feel alone , if you feel Like your life looks nothing like you want it to look , if you feel hopeless , for whatever reason , holidays can be Really tough .

I want you to know that that is a filter you have on your , your situation , your situation and the the facts of that situation are what they are . If you don't have a job , you don't have a job . If you don't have a relationship , you don't have a relationship .

You know , if you don't have enough money in the , in the bank , you don't have enough money in the bank . I'm not saying those things aren't true . They are . Those are the facts of your life .

But what I am saying is that you can choose to think Something completely different about what's possible for you , even if it feels 100% false Because of where you are , because we think about our possibilities in the future Based on our interpretation of where we are today , and anything that's too far from that we can see is unrealistic .

And I'm here to tell you that's not true . You can go from zero To a million in the bank . You can go from no relationship to being married this time next year . You can go from no job to the best job of your life unexpectedly in the next 30 to 45 days , absolutely , and it doesn't matter how old . You are right .

So that's the perspective I wanted to give to you today and , if you are interested , if you are , let me just say this in a place where you're not happy with where you are and you feel stuck and you don't know who to talk to . I Just want to encourage you to go to my Instagram and click on the link in my bio .

This little link you can click and there'll be a button in there to set up a free 30 minute call . I know it can be really intimidating and I get it like you might listen to the podcast regularly , but you know you don't . We don't know each other , we don't have coffee together , we don't . You know we're not personal friends .

But I will say like I'm not going to give you a hard sell what I want more than anything and why I started this . What for me right now is the side house . I do want to help people . I have been stuck at times in my life in certain places , sometimes a little stuck in my career , a lot of times really stuck in my relationships .

That has been an area of challenge for me and I will say that it just doesn't have to continue to be your experience and it just is a decision that you make that you want to start believing something new and it will feel a hundred percent false Initially . It will feel like you are lying to yourself .

It will feel like this is not true , this is a bunch of BS . We all know the world works in a completely different way and I'm here to tell you . It is about repetition . It is about what Henry David Thoreau shared .

We must walk the path of that new thought again and again and again Before it becomes a belief , because the river of your thoughts Run a certain way , because that's the way that was hardwired in . You can change that hardwiring . So if you need someone to talk to Schedule some time , it doesn't , it can be a video call .

It doesn't have to be , we can do it on the phone . Whatever you want , I just want to hear , like , what's going on for you . I can very quickly , as an objective observer , identify some of the thoughts that you have that you think are just truths about your situation .

I can point out what part of those are not truths , what part of those are actually thoughts and the value of potentially choosing new thoughts and where that can lead you in the year that we're about to enter .

So With that , I want to wish all of you the happiest of holidays and if you are Alone the holiday season , I want to tell you you can still make it a moment .

Go to the store , get yourself some of your favorite foods maybe foods that your family used to have when you were a child at Christmas , you know watch some of your favorite Christmas movies and even spend the time journaling and thinking about the new future that Is really in your power to create in the year to come .

So that's my wish for all of you this Christmas season . I'm thinking about all the places in the world that are experiencing a less than ideal Holiday , the places where people are in danger or there's war going on in conflict , and I just want to wish those people solace and that a peaceful resolution Comes as quickly as possible .

And for all of you who listen on a regular basis , thank you so much . I'm so grateful for you , and you could give me a Christmas gift if you would be so kind as to go Into your podcasting platform and leave me a rating or review if you enjoy the podcast . A five-star review would be Very much appreciated .

That improves my algorithm and it means that more people are exposed to my podcast on a regular basis . So , with all of that , one last merry , merry Christmas , and Until next time , make it a great

week . My friends , do you have a life coach ? If not , I'd be so honored to be your coach . I've created a virtual coaching program and monthly membership called next level . Inside we take the material you hear on this podcast , study it and then apply it . Join me at the purposeful career comm backslash next level .

Don't forget the the purposeful career comm backslash next level . Join me and together we'll make your career and life Everything you dream of . We'll see you there .