MINI: Listener Teddy shares his experience finding his dad in his 30s

Listen, ladies. Last week on the show, Laura, you were telling us a story that has divided your household. Really, you've got a friend in your life that has had a baby, only if she is the baby's daddy is a backpacker. He had a one night stand and thought it was a good night of fun. But I know he got this girl pregnant. She has not told him. Mary.

It's very scandalous, so she doesn't want to tell him. She's in her forties, he's in his twenties. But we've been having like lots of moral conversations in our household as to whether she has an obligation to tell him.

Yeah, if you missed it, this is what happens.

So the baby is now four months old.

Now.

The dad was a man who is in his very early twenties. He was in Australia as a backpacker. They're friends on Facebook and their friends on Instagram. But they had a one night stand while he was traveling through Sydney and he has no idea that he has fathered a baby.

Now, the big.

Moral question of this is is can she keep this a secret or does she morally have to tell him because at this rate, there's no way that this kid's ever going to find out who their father is.

It's you're a real sticky moral conundrum, right.

I just questioned, like, growing up this whole time not knowing who your dad is, but then maybe one day finding out that your mum always knew and she kept that secret from you.

Well, listen, it sounds like something that's you hear in movies, you hear on the radio. We had a pickup listener. His name is Teddy. Teddy is a listener of the show. He sent us a DM last week when we put this to air, and Teddy's story truly left me with my draw on thefore Teddy, welcome to the show. Why don't you tell us your amazing story?

Uh? Yeah, I was listening last week and I resonated with the story. I recently two months ago just met my biological father. Wow, and I'm thirty four, almost thirty five, and my mum chose not to tell my dad, Like I found out that she could have told him and she didn't, and she has now passed, so like I kind of answered that question. But yeah, Wow, it's been really good meeting.

Him so quickly set the scene. So did you did you ever ask about your dad growing up to your mother? Did you say, I want to meet him? Do you know who he is?

Well? Constantly, I was raised technically by my grandma, but my biological mum was in my life and I had asked and she just didn't give me an answer ever, like it was kind of just like I don't know, and so like that's kind of how I've lived with it, even like other members of my family were a bit weird about it.

Teddy, how did you find out?

Well, I did an ancestry dot com Yes, sponsor mem just kidding up they might now, But my mom, my mom was a bit of a bike around that at the time.

She had a good time in her twenties.

She had a few people at like around that time, but she always was stuck on my dad's name. And she had said that she was like, I think it's this guy. He's a cop, but I'm not sure. Literally all the information I had, and years later, maybe two years ago, I think I did an ancestry dot com thing and that last name was linked distantly and I

Wait, wait, okay, so your mom had mentioned a name in passing growing up. She's like, I could have been this guy. To be honest, I had a couple. So you find him on Facebook? And do you call him? Do you DM him? What's the first.

I just sent him a message being like, hey, did you know like and then serided my mom's name there, and then he left me on red for a while, and then a few months went by and then I was like, oh, you would have known her in like nineteen eighty eight, and then he was like, oh, yes I did. And I just I must feel been feeling really brazy that day because I just replied being like, oh, I think kill my dad. And then he called me and then we spoke on the phone for a bit and then yeah.

Can I ask what was it like when you met him for the first time, because you said you guys have a bit of a relationship.

Now was well, it's insane because I grew up not looking like anyone in my family, so I always stood out like I've got brown eyes. They all had blue eyes, so I never fitted in. And then as soon as I saw him, I literally everyone who's seen a picture of us says like he looks like me with like the the age filter on snapshirt and like.

It's just you have other kids.

Yes, I have now got by blood. I now have two more brothers and a sister. But he's also married now and so and she also has two sons and a daughter, so whole new family.

How do you think your mom would feel, teddy? Would your um be happy that you're connected? Do you think?

Or? Yeah, I think she actually would, Like she was she doesn't want to just didn't really care much like like, but I think she would now be very happy with it seeing how it has turned out.

I am.

I mean, obviously this has all come up because there's someone in our life who's going through this and knowing that you've had such an incredibly positive experience, what would be your advice or what would you have to say around like this kind of decision making as to whether she should or shouldn't tell him about the fact that he's fathered this baby.

Well, when it comes to my kids, I think you should always know get like, leave the option up to him at the end of the day, do you know what I mean. Make sure everyone's aware and then go from there. Yeah, in my opinion, because like he may not want or be able to like everyone's circumstance of the different Yeah, but like I just think he should know.

Imagine getting a Facebook message in the middle.

Seeing I've thought about it from his point of view, like so much, and I'm just being like, yeah, sorry about that, Teddy.

So great to meet you. Thank you for messaging and coming on the happy Teddy. Yeah we really are anytime. Hey, guys, a little bit of a different take.

After the break, I'm going to give you, guys a quiz, not just any quiz, a vending machine quiz.

Oh the quiz I've always been waiting for. You didn't know you needed it.