It is time for us to do this.
Ask our Cut, So ask gun Cut is a segment we do on Life on Cut where you guys call in with your deep you're dark and your burning problems and we get you to call up on a Thursday and tell us what's going on in your lives.
Now.
This week we have a caller. Her name is Mandy, and she wants to know whether she should be friends with her ex. Oh classic, Mandy, Welcome to the pickout, amens.
Hi, how are you going guys?
Hime Manby set the scene for us. What a you got going on?
So? My partner and I were together for six years, very young, got together when we was seventeen sixteen, I think, and earlier this year we decided to part ways. He ended it, but it was very mutual. Unfortunately, these things we got very comfortable with each other kind of stopped trying in the relationship because we got very comfortable. Yeah yeah, and we're young, like, yeah, of course haven't experienced things.
But we did the breakup. It was very hard, you know, still very much in love with each other because nothing really happens. However, we've kind of just become friends again after like we mended our broken heart and now our friends again, and he still sees the future with me, which is really hard to hear. But he doesn't want it now, He wants it in the future.
So absolutely, do you want to be with him now? Like do you want to get back together or do you not want to be with him?
Yes? And no?
Just to get it clear, is he saying to you, you're the person for me and I want to be with you, just not now.
Yeah, So he's saying like he's not saying it in a proud way. He's saying it in like a hurt's heart kind of way. He's saying, like, I see you as being my wife and the mother of my kids. But because we're twenty two and twenty three, he just thinks that, and there is merit and what he's saying, but he just thinks that being separate for a little bit longer would work to our favor. But I'm like, no, why are we torturing ourselves?
This is essentially exactly the same as the breakup I've just been through. Five years, we've been together, we've been apart six months, and we toyed back and forth going should we or should we not? Get back together, and I was so close to and the best thing I ever did was not biting the bullet. You need more time to learn about yourself. Have you dated anyone else in your life? Man?
Sure, I haven't. I haven't yet because I thought that I'm not open to it. It just I've just enjoyed being single.
I also think Mandy at this point in time, I think that's really hard is when you're friends with an ex who you still have a lot of feelings for, who you're saying, oh, one day we're going to be back together. It means you're not in any way open to meeting someone new.
Yeah, so you're not really.
Doing single properly. You're kind of doing You've got one foot in one camp and one foot in the other camp. And I guess the issue is is where are his feet? Because if he's dating other people, if he's exploring other things, it just feels like an opportunity for you to get hurt all over again and for him to break your heart a second time.
I actually get what he's saying though, in all honesty, I remember I was in a relationship for like eight years with someone I loved so much, and exactly the same thing. We were just young because we were only like sixteen, Mandy and I remember saying, me saying, we both said it to each other. We know we're going to be together forever, but we need to go and explore and do our own thing. And I think that
your partner, your your ex boyfriend. Sorry, I think he genuinely believes that because he does love you, but he obviously really wants to have some life experiences and not in the process. So I don't think he's actually been a dickhead about it. I think he genuinely thinks you guys are going to come back full circle. Maybe you will, maybe you won't.
Don't put your life on hold waiting for something that might be, because all you're doing is wasting time that you could be investing in something else or someone else for It'll be TI Mandy.
Hope that helps all right, Thank you guys.
Thanks.
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