Here we go the pickup.
Guys.
It's a bit of a somber mood because our very own Matildas were knocked out of the FIFA World Cup last night, which is not the outcome they wanted, not the outcome we all wanted.
But we could not be prouder of our girls. I mean, it's sad that.
They didn't make it through, but also still history making incredible to watch, an incredible how much this has changed women's sport forever.
I'm not gonna lie. I cried. I feel like I have a cry now reliving it. And I am just a spectator.
I can't imagine the emotions that they are going through, and they're mixed emotions. Obviously they're so disappointed, but they must be so proud of themselves and each other as well. So it's yeah, you know what, I'm sad because we may not get a public holliday anymore.
That's what's gonna happen.
We're not getting the public holidays. It's not happening.
I was hardly on hope for that one.
We may not be. No, no, it's not all right to break it to you, but that ship is sad.
I'm calling it sick anyway.
But truthfully, how many people can say they watched a game of women's soccer before this year? It has changed it for everyone. It's incredible.
It's changed history one hundreds and we're so proud of them. We're very, very very proud of them.
Anyway, Moving right along, we have a really interesting predicament today. We have an ask gun cut where you guys, a listener calls in or writes in with their problem.
And today's one is so tricky.
It's a co parenting, stepmom, blended families question. And I think a lot of OSSI's will relate to this or have been in a similar situation. Yeah, I mean we have the stepmom calling in. They always get painted. It's a bad guy, don't they.
Yeah, evil stepmom and all the Disney movies it's always the evil step mom.
Yeah, well maybe not that evil after all.
All right, we'll get around here at the pick up. Let's start Thursday dedicated to the Tillies. What a run, girls, girls. All right, we're here thanks to Chemists ware househead in today, great savings every day. It's the Pickup with Britt, Laura and Mitch. Here rush into Chemists Warehouse this Father's Day for big brand fragrances at the lowest prices, chemists warehouse great savings. Every day, it is time, guys for this.
Ask our pat.
So askun Kat is a show favorite.
We do it every Thursday and it's where you, guys, you call in with your deep, your dark, your biggest problems and we do our best to answer them.
Now we have a really, really hard one today.
We have Tanya on the phone and she is having some parents, some problems co parenting with her partner's X.
Oh my god, Hi Tanya, welcome to the pickup.
Hey guys, Hi, Hi Danielle Danye, what's happening.
I'm just kind of co parent with the narcissist luck and I'm on the other end and it's my partner's ex wife. So I'm seeing it as the female watching the male get completely screwed, and you know, his children are being taken away from him and used as financial pawns. And I'm realizing how powerless I am. But like men in these co parenting situations, I got them at a very young age, extremely close. So this has only kind
of happened over the last year or so. Were so actively involved and we had them for so long and regularly, and then all of a sudden when they I guess became of age. It was just they were manipulated and they believe that they were only financially benefited for us, and we don't have them anymore.
So how old were they? And then what happened a year ago? Like what changed?
Yeah?
So their preteens kids test both parties. We get that we were acknowledged like one of the kids were lying. We thought we would address it. The other party had basically shared that information and manipulated this situation to go, Well, they've gone through your personal devices, they've caught you out, and now they're like, well, I don't want to come home.
So when you say the kids are being used as financial pawns and against you in what capacity do you mean there is the ex trying to get more money from you.
Yeah? Yeah, so obviously through your child support you the kids have to stay a certain amount with the dad for them to I guess be considered as a contributor. Is not the dads have to pay more child support.
Well, how do you think that she's trying to manipulate the kids to want to stay with her more to get more money.
It's not think it's one hundred percent.
I think that all you can really do in this situation is the kids are going to look back and remember how they were treated by whom at this point. But if you are constantly not showing these kids that they are loved and supported and you know you will do anything for them, and they feel safe, then that
is going to be powerful enough. When the time comes and the other mum is telling them these stories against you trying to manipulate them, they're like, well, we actually have an amazing time when we're with them that we feel so loved and so safe. I know that they're preteens and maybe it's changed, but from my understanding, I grew up in a separated household. We had to do shared parenting with my dad. Even at preteens, you don't
really have a choice around where you are at. It's still too young to make that decision for yourself, and so there should be some If you're not able to be able to get parenting access because that's being denied to you, there should be some other ways in which that can be.
I don't want to go so far as say man data, but there are rules.
Around it where you know the kids are going to be co parented between the two houses, and I think in order to have that opportunity to have face time with them so that when they are with you, they know that they're not in trouble, because that seems like that's a big thing, is that they're so worried that they're going to get in trouble if they're at your house, but having them there to exactly as it's said, like reinforce that they're not in trouble, reinforce that the love
is consistent and that it's not conditional based on the way that they're behaving or what they're doing.
And I guess the other.
Big thing is is you can go through these periods where you think that this is going to be a static but in a year's time they will be older. The situation will continually change as they get a little bit older and as their understanding of everything changes too, And I think the only thing you can be is consistent with your love and your your adoration of them.
And also last thing, kids, even if they're yours or their step children, it doesn't matter at that preteen early teen age, they hate you regardless like every kid goes to that moment where they're going to hate their mum and they rebel and it does come back around, and it will because you sound like an amazing parent. So that's also I know you feel horrible, like you're the horrible step mum, but we've all literally, I feel like especially females but like girls, we all go through it.
It's hard on Alan because you know we have and obviously you have to go back to courts now.
Yes, yeah, the problem they do have their stay once they're past twelve, so it's hard because they miss them.
And yeah, like the dynamics of our family have changed, you know, the pressure on our marriage, trying to support that relationship when these beautiful minds are being manipulated and said, it's it's horrible to think that that's what they're growing up to believe.
Yeah, that's tough to keep us updated. Okay, our thoughts are with you and listen. If you want to get on the show like that, you can DMUs on the Pickup on the socials so you can write in the Pickup dot com dot au. But that is a tricky.
Situation, Yeah, it really isn't it.
Yeah, all right, guys, we're back after this. Here on the pick up, Sprit Laura and Mitch here on the pickup. Thanks to chemists warehouse heeading today, great savings every day. You guys have all heard a flubber right for.
The movie Yeah Green babylis with a.
Tummy so good? But have you heard of fubbing?
Sounds sexy? Fubber actually sounds quite un sexy. It's a new trend that is emerging, especially in relationships. A new study that has come out of the US has investigated the effects of fubbing, which is snubbing your partner by using he's the pH your phone.
Fu abbreviate everything. Yeah, no, here's what fubbing is. Okay, because I think you're both guilty of it. They enlisted seven hundred and twelve married couples with an average of thirty seven years old. That's how old they were, so similar ages to us in the room. They were then surveyed on their marriage satisfaction, fubbing tendencies, and communication skills.
The results came back grim couples who can't put their phone down and who fubb each other led to marital dissatisfaction and divorce.
I know that, yes, fubbing as a thing, but like, that's just ignoring your partner.
Okay, hold on, let me give you the signs that you're a fubber, because these have come out of the university. Now you all are ticking many of these boxes. Britain more whatever. Signs that you're a fubber. You always have your phone out when you're with your partner in your hands.
I have a partner that lives in the same hemisphere. She's on her phone because she's on the phone to her partner.
Oh yeah, most of your conversations with your partner are kept short because you're often scrolling your phone. Short conversations.
Oh I'm on my phone a lot, but I'm not on it for social media? Does that matter? I don't know what about this?
You fill in gaps in conversation by checking your phone.
No, so many people do it in everything, and people do it with everything.
Okay, what about this? When you're watching TV together, you go on your phone in the ad break instead of talking to each other.
I don't know how I can answer these because Benley's on the other side of the world. But what I do notice is that I can What would it be called inter fub inter fubbing, international fubbing. What international fubbing, it's the interfub I can fub on the phone to band. So sometimes this happened last night. Actually, I was on a FaceTime to him on the iPad, so my phone was free, and I was emailing because I had to
do some work emails at nighttime. And I was emailing and still trying to have a conversation with him, and he actually said after about forty minutes, he goes, I'm just gonna go call me back when you're free.
And I was like, I am free. He's like you're not. You're working.
He's like that's cool, but like call me back. And I was like no, I want to put the phone down to talk to him. And then every part of me wanted to press send on the email.
I was like trying and not letting me be like send. I could just see it sitting there.
You he fubbed him. Wow, guys, just stop fubbing your partner. Have a conversation. It's not that hard. I fubbed my partner. My partner fubbed me.
You have to have fed you.
I mean, you fugged him. I fubbed him.
Yet I think it's good if you're if you feel like this is something that you do in your relationship, it's too much, bitch. If it's something that you do in your relationship, You've got to have rules, so like, past a certain point of time, put your phone away, or if you're watching a movie together the phones go
into other rooms. I think you have to have especially if you're someone who's so easily distracted by social media or by scrolling, you just have to have time with your partner where your phone is not on you because you can't be you can't be expected.
To have self but even our special time has to be on the phone. Here go to break.
The pickup. Welcome everyone, britt, Laura and Mitch. Here rush into chemist Warehouse. This Father's day for big brand fragrances at the lowest prices. Chemists Warehouse great savings every day.
All right, I have a confession and an admission to make.
You're rocking in your chair, can you hear brittain panther.
I'm liking this. She's going to make an admission.
Yeah, And it's upsetting to me because I know it's going to make you both very happy. Because it's something you have been hounding me on for a long time, and I've always denied it.
My dog Delilah has some very toxic traits.
My God, that takes such self reflection.
Thank you. She's been doing the work.
Dailah hasn't because she's a shit of a dog. But your Australian Terrier has beautiful blue eyes.
Who cares? She's naughty. She's very naughty. My dog Delilah is a beautiful dog.
But everyone in you too, mainly You've always got problems with her behavior, what she does, and I have always defended it and said she's not that bad.
She's great at home.
You know.
I have taken this on very seriously, like she's my child.
I've always been offended at your disdain, but I do admit her disdain. Delilah is the equivalent of a really attractive person in a supermodel, you can get away with being a bit of an asshole because they're so hot.
It is. She's that in a dog.
Guys. We went to your house on the weekend, Laura. I just got my ear pissed. It is one day from healing there. It is just about to close up and be a brilliant ring. And I'm sitting on the couch at your house eating some beautiful dip and Delilah comes up behind me and licks my ear lobe and sucks my open wound on my lobe. Now it's infected.
No, you should be thanking her, Mitchchuri, because dogs so Liva has anty biotics sit.
That's why. It's why they lick wounds. So what she did, it's going to eat meat.
There's not one dog in any hospital around the world licking I do.
I have trained her to sniff out a wound and she will lickically. Okay, That I think is very very vanilla in comparison to the fact that Lola, my two year old, is sitting there eating her sandwich. Her dog, our dog, Buster, is sitting there being very placid, just looking hoping for treats. Delilah has her heckls up and is going to attack Buster to get Lola's food. And anyway, you ended up dragging her through the house by the collar to get her away.
From the kid and the dog.
Okay, look, some of her toxic traits are. She no longer eats normal food. She will leave kibble, She'll starve.
Herself to day.
She'll starve herself out until I give her salmon, tuna, fish, a tea, bone steak.
Yeah.
She takes the ball at the park.
She runs, picks it up, she doesn't fetch it, brings it deep into the bushes she can go so I can never retrieve it, then walks out without it.
Least does it with other people's balls too, does it with other people. Very toxic.
She looks directly in the eye meat, directly when I'm telling you to do something, high five, sit, go on a bit, anything she knows.
She looks directly at me, looks through me. It completely ignores me.
Toxic.
It's very toxic, very troublesome. We've had some callers. We've had someone calling with their toxic traits. Make me feel better, Katrina.
Thirteen, Katrina, what's your dog's toxic trade?
So my Roody and I can say that any other rot wheeler parent an that would be listening would agree that.
He has to be attached to me by his butt.
So he even if he's like running, he's running out towards me for a hug, and then he'll like go turn around and then back into me and have his butt on me, and sometimes if I if it because he's trying to sit down, he ends up wiping his butt pole down my leg.
He's just trying to territory it does he means to Katrina toxic what he's doing?
Oh yeah, that's a yeah, toxic, toxic thanks Steph thirteen six five. What's your pet's toxic trait?
We don't have any children at home, and we have to have a baby gates throughout the house because Pervoodle runs off of the sox in any bit of clothing that might be loose. And if we drop one out of the washing machine before we've noticed, she'd already collected it.
What does she do with it?
We're trying to bitehole.
We have a lot of foxs from holes and them a lot of random box now none of them really match up. And if I tell her off, then she runs past my favorite house plan and bites down on one.
Leap you.
Know, delicate, Yeah, you don them to bite them? Oh my god, But have you thought maybe she's trying to put your clothes.
Away for you, Daniel who used to try and steal dirty undies out of the washing basket and but through those that's a whole other type of top.
My dog Hamish loves a tampon, but that's a conversation for another time.
Why don't you women sure?
I live with women.
For the reason. I think the conclusion of this is is that Delilah is canceled and Delila.
Is basic work.
If there's anyone out there, any dog trainers, literally slune my dam all right, let's get out of here.
My