FULL SHOW: Why couples are more likely to split after Baby No. 2?

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Good Pickup with Britt Hockley and Laura Burn.

Brady, your work, our windows down, that's my worldris in the dust, only good zabs all down.

I've done much, but yeah I'm not. I'll big get and what I want.

It don't matter where.

This is the pickup. Happy hum day afternoon everyone. It is the pick Up with Britt Hockley and Laura Burn.

Are you feeling this fine Wednesday?

Laura, I mean I'm feeling good now. We had a little bit of a setback this week.

We had. I say we because I do.

Think that when your kids are in kindergarten and they have assignments, Jew, that it also kind of falls on the parent as well.

Like it's like we had an assignment, Jew.

No kindergartener is doing assignments on their own. Everything is the parent.

But also like, I don't know how a lot of parents have time for the homework part of school. And I say this because if your kids are going to after school care and they don't finish school until five o'clock, my kids are in bed at six thirty. Yeah, they got to come home, they got to eat dinner, and then they're in bed. We were a little bit late for Marley's first school project.

What is a little bit late?

We were a week late, oh, getting the first project in.

It's okay. We got an extension. It was extension on.

Your first project when you're in kidd That is wild.

And it was on her favorite number, which is number six. Okay, yeah, is that because she's six?

Well, she turned six tomorrow.

It's her birthday, so she wanted to maybe she wanted to delay it so it was within her birthday week, so it made a bit more sense.

Do you know what. I don't have children, but I think school are two lax these days.

Back in my day, if you had just signed MAC children, No, we don't recommend it used to tie.

Us up to the chairs. If you had an assignment juke. It was juke like you would lose points every day. It wasn't du because it taught you like discipline and structure and that you know, you can't just run your own race.

No, but also it's our fault. I'm not going to blame a six year old for that. It is our fault that it hasn't been submitted. But also we were away for your wedding. That's my fault, it's your fault, your wedding, and so she was overseas and that's why it got delayed. But she's just when it comes to homework. She's really smart, she's doing so well, but she is not motivated to get the homework side.

Of things done.

I remember being in kindergarten and going to my first interview with our school principal and.

He had this big wooden desk.

I don't think he ever used it, but he just had a cane on display, like in a holder on.

His desk to subtle flex just I don't have to use it, but you know it's there and I don't have to say anything about it.

School has definitely changed and it's definitely not a bad thing.

All right, Well, everyone put your books out for Marley May.

Now recently we traveled over to Bali for your wedding. We did, we did, and wonderful it really was.

Do you know what was in a highlight though, Matt trying to out my wedding before I had it.

That was away a light for you.

While speaking of my husband, No, the hardest part of traveling international when you have kids is the travel part, right, It's the booking the flights, it's getting them to the airport. But one thing that I think we don't consider enough is the seat orientation, Like what is the best seat selection when you were either traveling as a solo parent with your kids and like Matt had to come over by himself. So my husband, Matt, he flew over with

Now, keep in mind, we've got a five year old and a four year old.

They're still really young and they're at an age where they need to be supervised on a flight.

But what Matt wanted.

To book and what he ended up booking, was the girls sitting completely by themselves on the window seat and him sitting completely by himself on the aisle seat.

Now I thought that this sounded like absolute madness.

I'm like, if you're traveling with kids, and I've done a few international flights with our kids by myself, and I've always sat next to them in the middle, like contain them, sit between them and they're fighting, you can pass out the snacks like you're there and you're ready to supervise.

Why would you have not sat with them? Was only two seats in the aisle, not three?

I don't know none of those options for three as well. You could have sat it could have sat in the middle of the kids.

Now, we had a bit of a debate about this, and I have him on the line because I'm still confused as to how he thought or maybe still thinks that this is the way to go and that this is what parents should be doing for the.

Solution of how to travel with kids.

All right, how long? Jerry Springer mat Hello, my darling.

Hello lady? How are we.

Were very well, probably better than you after flying Soli by yourself.

What was your reasoning behind this?

Firstly, well, I like to think of this trip as a scientific experiment. I'm trying to make breakthroughs to the industry of parenting. It's a selfless act for me.

What I do want to say, though, is I was shocked by how many people on your socials were saying that it was a good idea, that they tried this, and they actually thought it was.

But it was the secret source.

You could have all sat together, though that's the question.

Yes, very good question, Brutin. I'm glad you asked it. I thought what I was trying to achieve here is the fact that we have two kids, Miley and Lala. They are now four and five, for reference, old enough to talk after themselves, all right, and so I, yes, old.

Enough to look after themselves.

Four their self contained. And I just thought it would be nice on a six and a half hour flight by myself as a solo parent. May I add, Laura, I hope you're enjoying your mocktails by the pool. I just it it'd be nice to have some reprieve from the kids. Like I can watch my movie, they can watch their movie. They're happy, I'm happy, everybody has a great time.

I do have a question here, then, So I know that Laura was enjoying her cocktail mockshow mockow she's pregnant. But what about how just a couple of months ago she traveled twenty seven hours alone with the kids to South Africa while you'd been away in the jungle for a month.

You know what, we made that trip a lot better if she had separated herself from the children.

I think, Look, maybe you're onto something. I feel like this is genius for the parent and terrible for everyone who's sitting around. The children want it that way.

Did it work?

Look, I'll be honest, it didn't work as well as I thought it would have because the kids didn't sleep. If they would have slept, it would have been a lot better. But I just think it's really important to say that at the first hurdle you shouldn't give up. Like, for example, Oppenheimer, right, he was trying to make a nuclear bomb. If he'd given up after the first mistake, we never would have had it. Driving the barriers are parenting to make sure that we have these breakthrough it

All right.

Well, speaking of pushing the boundaries and pushing the hurdles. On the flat home, which Matt also booked, he booked three seats together and one of them solo.

And let's all have a guess which parents sat solo.

Not a shock, Matt, Thank you for l heroes where Cape, thank.

You for do you can't just wrap me up?

I just did well, Laura.

It is that time of year again where Australia has the version of the Oscars. It is Gold Logi nomination time. The nominations have come out and do you know what, the women are absolutely cleaning up.

There's only one bloke.

I think Hamish Blake is not surprising.

I know, I mean he's going to be literally dying.

There's going to be one male who makes it into the Logi nomination who direct.

It's going to be Hamish Blake.

But there's so many incredible women that have been nominated, but one I'm very excited about TV Legend, TV veteran.

I was in the jungle with her.

She has hosted I'm a Celebrity to Get Me out of Here eleven times. She has been nominated for a Gold Logi four times.

And for some reason, is yet to win. We're going to try and change that. Julia Morris, Welcome.

To the show.

Well.

I couldn't be more thrilled to be here with you, glorious humans.

Julia.

We are hard on the campaign trail for you this year. We are so behind you. I thought you were a shoeing last year that this year. It is twenty twenty five, it is the year of Julia Morris.

Surely it's the year of the old male. Oh my god. Everyone's saying, what's the campaigning going to be? Like, I'm like, I can barely like feed compass for the pick up and drop off. I do not know that I'm up campaigning. You feel like a knucklehead campaigning. So I'm like, oh, a friend of mine and I just as a coincidentally, we're sort of whinging about how can we don't you know? I was whinging she's not in television. I was like, hey, com I keep sort of missing out on bits and pieces.

Talk in my language?

Now?

I do sporadic park or two? Julia?

Sorry, do we think that this is going to shift the dial on the votes? Are you just having a good time in between? Like what, we've got to get the.

Votes as weidental? Well, the thing is, I thought, well, what will end up happening is if my audience that followed me on all my bits and pieces are chill with me, not ramming the logos down their throats. And so I'm hoping just the fact that I have put some effort into making something while a massive life is swirling around us all at all times.

Do you reckon it's going to be the biggest competition this year? I mean, do you look at that and figure sit there going, oh, they did this and they'd.

Yeah, absolutely, absolutely deep down because you're like, you know, you would love to take it. I would love to be in history as one of those names. It is a tremendous honor. I was talking to someone recently who was in House Husbands with me, one of the ladies, and we're saying, did you think we'd still be hustling at this age?

It doesn't.

He's like no, seeing as of other industries have moved on to either be CEO or CFO or special you know whatever FO and so, you know, but in the entertainment industry, everybody hustling. We're still hustling.

Do you know what I think. I think you've got a I think you've got a little secret.

Weapon right at your disposal. We've seen Robert Irwin take his shirt off with seeing him.

Everyone loves him. He's your partner in crime. Get him amongst it, Like, I don't think it's I.

Think ed borrow and plead, and if that means stealing your shirt to get him on your campaign trail again, I think you've got to do it.

I had to start processing at the beginning of his sentence because I was just like, oh, do I need to get out of the Andies hang on ed the snake. I thought I'd seen enough snake, so I've got no business with them. And yeah, maybe I'm in the Andies in the front yard on the astro tour.

You could do it together. We don't discriminate.

You guys are having a very parallel experience at the moment because he's about to start shooting Dancing with the Stars in the US.

And actually Sonya, Sonya's up for a LOGI as well.

It's you're up against absolutely.

That was the other great pleasure about it yesterday. And when you're saying like you do, do you eye up the competition? I mean we're all laughy you what six women nominated? One man takes its stop that also, HAMI like, please please nobody vote for me, And I was like, mate, you know, get your game on. None of us want to handed it to us. And let me tell you, every single person on that stage, if they talk it you go worthy winner though, Yeah, worthy winner.

Yes, Julia, we are and so so have your back on this.

We can't wait to see you up there on stage.

Oh my goodness. Well, let me tell you the speech would be unbridled because I've got a feeling the vibe as would have worn off like hours before, so I would be and so the h I gets very scared of you know, around that five to eleven at night, you're like, oh, that's Mummy's witching hour.

That and that's when you're that's when you're well around There is to vote just for that to see it, I'll be like, level, yeah, I've even told my haters, am I.

From what I've observed with the Gold Logi, you sort of then down disappeared not long after that. So you're like, well, his thing. If you hate me, you can make me go away by giving me this goal LOGI.

There's both sides. You can vote. Now, go and vote for Julia Morris to.

Win the Gold Logi at the TV week logos. Everyone, it's a TV Week logis dot com.

Dot at you.

I was something the other day now, and I say this because my Instagram social media algorithm is one one hundred percent pregnancy and baby related.

At the moment, I thought even they served something like you had a restaurant, like someone served divorce papers.

Actually I did not get served divorce papers, but it is what we're talking about.

It's a new theory.

And there was an article around it, and it's called second child divorce syndrome. Now it's all around when as a couple you go from having one kids to two kids and the additional stress that that puts on your relationship with your partner. I mean, when I reflect back on when we brought Lola into the world, and yes it was COVID and she was like we had our kids really close together, I was so deeply unprepared for how much going from one to two that transition was

She was an easy child.

Yeah, what I realized now is that we had like a unicorn baby.

She slept well, she ate well, she was a relatively easy baby, and it made us feel so cocky and secure that we were like.

Oh my god, we've got this thing down, cake, Let's have a second one. And so we had Lola really shortly afterwards.

They're only about nineteen twenty months apart, and going from one to two was by far the hardest transition that I've ever made in my adult life in any way and any capacity. I mean, when I think about work transitions or starting new jobs, or starting new relationships or going through breakups. One to two kids absolutely knocked me sideways. And it was trying to juggle two babies at two different schedules.

It was the sleep.

It's also the pressure it puts in your relationship because you no longer have time for the relationship and the same capacity that you did earlier.

And on top of that, Lola wasn't necessarily the easiest baby.

Yeah, she was a really tricky baby and didn't sleep well and there was a lot of crying, and I felt constantly touched out and exhausted because she would only sleep on me, so I had to have her in a carrier, sitting up in bed with two pillows prop behind me. And that's how I slept for six weeks,

You decide to have a third one, I we're in such a better space.

But I think because now I understand how short lived that time is, that absolute pressure cooker of having little kids, is that it makes me feel a little bit better about the fact that, like we're all on the same page, all right, eighteen months, it's going to be really really hard, and then we're going to slowly come out and like come up for air again, and we're just kind of I think we're a little bit more prepared for the impact it's going to have this time.

Yeah, yeah, rather than taking it and thinking, oh, it's doomsday.

But what's the theory.

Well, the theory is around how a lot of relationships break down in that period of going from one to two kids and how it has like some people feel as though it has this irreparable effect on their relationship that they can't get over.

To be fair, I mean, I remember talking to my parents about this. My mum and dad had been married nearly fifty years and they've had four kids, and we're all really close.

I remember them saying the same thing.

It's like, you feel like you're never going to get out of it, and you feel like you're never going to be able to afford things again, you're never going to have time for each other again, you never whatever, you're never going to sleep properly again. And all of a sudden, the light lifts and then you're like, oh, Okay, the best years of my life were actually going to come after this because we stuck it through together and didn't make those decisions when you're in the depths of despair.

Yeah.

And I think that maybe there's a bit of a misconception. And I know everyone's parenting experience is different, but I do think that there's a bit of a misconception that're going from nothing to one is the hardest transition, because you go from not knowing what it's like to having kids to having a baby that you've got to care for. But I think for a lot of people that's actually

So do you think about how hard it's going to be?

Would you think number three is going to be easier because you like, do you think it's the opposite, Like two's harder than trees? Easier because the kid's older, You've done it, you know it inside out.

I Am not going to allow myself to lull myself into the false like I'm not having any defenses, Laura, I will not have the security so I have.

I've if anything, I think I've over prepared myself for how hard it's going to be. That I'm hoping I'll be pleasantly surprised or at least it will meet my expectations.

That's it.

Have the bar so long on the ground. There's only one way.

So we make it sound terrible. Being a mom is amazing, It really is. That's why we all go back and do it again.

All right, let's get out of here. That is asked Don and Dust