FULL SHOW: What did your toddler eat?

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This is the pick up, Hi, guys.

It's the pick up with Bread Hockey and Laura Ben. And it's so exciting.

Today.

Oh my god, today is a very very big day.

You may not have heard the news, and I will excuse you if you haven't.

I got married yesterday.

I am no longer a single woman. Actually I was a single woman before that.

Anyway, I was, in fact engaged and off the market.

We know, we know you're engaged. I got married.

I actually can't believe if I'm saying, Liz, I'm married, Briz Segrest, Britt.

Got married yesterday. Hey, are you going with secrets? Is that what we're changing to? It's the pickout with Britt Secrets and Laura Burn. No, that's weird. Yeah, it felt. Do you know what I'm gonna do?

I think I'm going to be missus secret like in the private world, and like if we have kids and stuff like that, but publicly I think Britt Hockley.

It's also like once you're established, once you've like got a I mean not to be like you've got.

A name for yourself. I feel like thirty seven thirty eight, you're like attached to your name. Yeah. I was too attached to my name to change.

I couldn't be bothered. I also hate paperwork, so I kept burn.

But it's weird. I got married on a Wednesday. It's the cheapest day of the week. Cost it's it's a budget of time.

No, it actually only had to do with what was available.

To be honest, Wednesday was the only day that was available for the venue that we wanted, so we locked that bad boy in.

We managed to sneak away and get it done.

So we actually are like we're here in your ears now, but we're not actually going to be here. I know.

This is like the first real trick of radio, isn't it. We are currently in Bali. We are celebrating BRIT's wedding and we're going to be back next week. So Monday's show, make sure you're listening because we're going to be unpacking every single detail all the best bits from the wedding.

Yes, unfortunately I do get a two day honeymoon, but then.

We will be back on Monday. We will be back.

Now it is Thursday, which means it is time for what we do every Thursday, and that is ask Guncut, where you guys give us a call and you tell us you're deep as dark as problems, and even though we have absolutely no qualifications or skills, necessarily we do our best to answer them and give the life advice to save you a bit of money.

We actually have qualifications. You say that every week or.

We do this on our podcast, Life Uncut podcast, and that's been going pretty good for us specific so we thought we'd.

Bring across an. We got Alisha on the phone.

Hi Alisha, Hi guys, Alisha, what is going on in your house?

My partner doesn't really like having my dog in our bed.

How long have you been with your partner for and is this a new problem or is it a problem that's always existed.

Well, we're reaching like a three year mark. It's been two and a half years. This is actually a new thing. We only moved in maybe like a year ago, so, but it's just happened and I'm kind of freaking out about it because like, whoa where did this come from?

So like they've cheated?

Hang on, where does this come from? So a few questions? Hang on, we need to set the scene. Are we talking Chihuahua or great Dane?

No, it's brutles.

So he's a little big.

Oh, goodles are big, okay?

And I don't even know what a goodle is. It's a groodle. They're big.

They're very big Golden Retriever poodles.

Sorry, sorry, I just did a quick google. There's three sizes, miniature, medium and standard.

Miniature is fifteen kilos, twenty two kilos or thirty kilos.

Fifteen kilo has been the smallest.

That's still big. It is a standard okay, right, so twenty two kilos.

So important question?

Was the groodle a part of your life before you met your partner or did you bring it in to your life together as a couple.

Well, here's my dog, so i've him for five years and he's just kind of getting on a bed.

I mean, the gle, the grudle has slept in your bed for five years, and now your partner's decided that it's just too much.

And the dog needs to go and sleep in a dog bed. I understand that to be do you know.

I had a very similar situation, so I have My dog is much bigger than this. He's forty kilos and he used to sleep in bed.

With me every single night.

And then I met my husband, and then also my husband would start sleeping in bed with us. And at one point we've been together for about eight months, Matt woke up in the middle of the night and he said, I've had enough. He's like, I can't do this anymore. And this is the first time we'd ever had a conversation about it. He was like, it's me or the dog. The dog has to sleep in a dog bed. I

And Buster's now in a dog bed next to Can you not get a dogbed next to the bed?

I feel like that's a good solution, so that the grudle's still in the room, but it's.

Not in or you know, in your room.

Yeah, I guess, so I guess it just feels funny because he moved into like my house.

Yeah, but.

Unless the bed is like one of those extra king beds, that's really really big. I understand because sleep is very important if you're getting broken sleep because you have a giant grudle licking you, moving around making noise. Grudles don't molt. But if there was another dog that like molten and hair was all through it, like for me, that's pretty gross. I think you need to move the groodle to the ground.

Where does the groodle go when you guys are being intimate with each.

Other, just looks at them.

He can go where he likes, you know, wherever he sits, he sits.

Okay, look, the grudle needs to go on a dog bed.

I don't think.

Yeah, I don't think it's worth it, the divorce or the split. I think, moves it to the bed.

I get it.

I get why this is hard, but I reckon for the sake of your relationship, it's time to pop.

You know.

The pooch in the dog bed right next to the bed, he's very close, he's not going to feel too like he's been shafted.

I think that that's your best solution. Okay, thanks for calling if you want.

If you want some advice like that and also feel defeated, give us a call at the pickup.

That was a great call.

I don't even know how I'm going to say this out loud, it is so mortifying, but I do want to put a call out to you guys, what did you find your kid eating?

Because there is a woman in the UK that.

Ducked upstairs for a couple of seconds just to put some washing away, and when she came downstairs, she saw her two year old making quite the mess in the lounge room. And she looked at his shirt and he had something all over his shirt. Then she looked at the table and she saw something all over the table. And you're not going to believe what he was eating.

Oh my god, when.

Your son eat? She died as ushers my song Huzzy.

And my Dad's lush years Briet. I saw this and I think I even I can't remember. I feel like I sent it to every single group chat that I'm in your.

Son when your son is your dad?

That was her radiocaption.

I mean obviously, like from the audio, you can't visualize this. The ash is everywhere, It's all over the house. If anyone who's ever scattered an ash of a loved one knows just how like it is a very specific thing, like it's a white, ashy substance, and it just kind of plumes everywhere. It is all over her house, all over her chair, and all down her todd lune not straight now.

The worst part is it's all over his face, It's all over his cheeks. He's literally been eating it.

Anyway. The comments is Dad, I'll live on forever in that toddler.

Everyone's like, I'm pretty sure this isn't how reincarnation works.

Well, at least he's going to be part of your son forever, which he's not. He's going to be pooed out. Your son will pooh out your dad.

The fact that she has had a laugh about this is I think is brilliant because this could go two ways, like your dad has been consumed.

Also, I'm impressed that the todder was able to open it. If anyone who's ever had an urn, usually the hardest part is trying to crack the lid.

Open the earth.

Well, this looks more like this could be on the mom It does look tea pottish.

You just take the lid off a little bit, so that to me looks like they've already cracked the urn before and they've separated it, so they just put part of it in that teapot. That needs to have a stad's legs. Yeah, that needs to be a lockable lid. I mean, I saw this when we were talking about in the car and my daughter was in the back seat.

Marley, she's five.

Last year, we spread my grandfather's ashes like her papa.

He was a really, really big part of my life.

But spreading ashes never really goes to plan, is what I've realized, especially if it's a slightly windy day.

We like tipped him off a mountain.

And the wind picked up, and I sorry, even though he said that we tipped him off.

She just scattered him off, scattered him. We scattered Papa off a mountain.

He would laugh about this, But the wind came and at the same time the bag flipped back over and it went in my mouth, down my shirt, into my pants. But as we were talking about this in the car, Marley, it was like it clicked for her and she was like, wait, that was actually Papa, and I was like, yeah, she grows.

She thought it was.

She goes, but how did he become dirt? And I was like, oh, we're not going into that right now. That is a conversation. Why did you eat him?

Why we've had Sophie call up Sophie high what did you find your kid eating? Well, it was a friend's toddler and they came out a staying at a cabin and they just arrived and their toddler crawled out with the toilet brush in their mouth.

O my god.

For some reason, there's something worse about like a toilet brush from home, like your own poop.

It's far worse when it's from a rental.

Maybe they thought it was a chop top.

You know, he can't be the level.

It was not a chop top.

If anything was a crumble, I can't, I can't, all right, So that is actually.

Discussing kids aren't disgusting brit though.

That's the thing, Phoebe, What did your kid put in their mouth?

My kids?

He was disappearing us to the side, and all of a sudden I saw this little thing in his hand.

With its eyes shut. He licked a lizard, a dead lizard.

Oh, I don't know.

I think that's that bad.

My mom when my mum was a kid, she got known for licking the bottom of snails and she would bail her at like my uncle and Arnie up and make them lick the bottom of snails too.

But to be fair, at least it was dead.

I will say.

We had some people on the.

Text line just writing in saying that they found the kid with like live animals like snails and.

Stuff that were still.

Yeah, it's yeah, it's because they Is it like that? Were you talking about like a tiny little gecko? Is this like a big blue toe?

It was a little skung.

And it looks so peaceful, And I'm like, oh, I get it out.

Of your mouth.

Do you think it was alive before he licked it?

No? I was definitely it was well dead. Oh thank you.

Isn't it disgusting? Kids are rain But you only know half of it.

I'm sure my kids have done way worse, but I just don't I don't even commit it to memory anymore.

Don't care a lot of text lines about the kids eating poop. Yeah, I mean, like they've all accidentally at some point that's a choice.

It just no.

I don't think a two year old two us.

I think they just don't have very good motor skills and hands go flying and things go fine.

Well, we have the man himself in the studio with us today. Sam, You've been a friend of us for so long. We've done many interviews with you. You even came on our Life on Cut podcast tour with us to every single show.

We couldn't love you more. Welcome to the pickup.

Ah, my girls, so good to be back together.

Yes, you have some big, exciting things happening in your life at the moment.

You've moved. You also have new head. But more importantly than that, you have a new single that is out now.

Yes, it's called love Life, which the lyrics of this very sentimental.

Why like, what was the reasoning behind it?

It's been a crazy year and I am trying to focus on the joy in my life because I have a tendency to get quite negative when I talk about my career because a lot of just bs has happened. But being independent, moving to a new country, finding myself there, and really trying to hold on to the joy in my life instead of focusing on everything that has gone wrong. Has a real struggle for me, and so I just thought of love life because I want to love life and I want to find a way to be able

Were having some big changes.

As you just mentioned though.

You've moved to London and you've gone independence. So it's a really big thing for an artist to go independent. How has that transition being what's it look like?

It was really scary at first, I think going from any kind of major label system with a full team with full budget. But I'm across everything now which I wasn't in the past, and that's what has kind of screwed me over.

But that is what it is, and focusing on the future.

Being able to be independent, to have total creative control is scarier than anything because every decision comes back on me and my team is amazing, But at the end of the day, the captain of the ship is the you know, the one that says in the boat to go down and that's.

The analogy, right, guys, that's the same.

Yeah, it is.

The cuptain goes down with the ship.

It does go down, ye yeah, yeah great?

Is this what I mean?

It's a positive or negative? Now I'm not quite.

Sure, you know, as in, like, I have so much pride in the boat.

That you're saying that I'm on you know what, I'm building this boat by myself and if it sinks, well with the villages exactly, if that's really what it is. If it sinks, I will be sinking it.

Oh yes.

Being on the label and having the pressure of like, you need to get five thousand pre saves on a song, and then once you get to five thousand, they're like, okay, let's push for twenty thousand, and then you get to twenty thousand, you push for fifty thousand, and if you don't get to fifty thousand, then the labels like, oh, maybe this isn't going to work, and you're like, well,

Some of the songs and the lyrics that you write, like, obviously, they're very personal, and even when you talk about them, it's kind of like it's a personal discovery or like a little bit of a diary entry. How does your wife feel, who's also a musician, when she hears some of the vulnerable parts of songs, like it does it bring you guys together?

Do you talk about it?

Like?

How does that conversation fold out?

Yeah? I mean, Aaron has been with me this whole journey, so she knows everything, and she's seen everything go down, and there's been a lot of stuff that the public doesn't know that's happened behind the scenes, which was devastating.

I mean, to be totally transparent.

The reason we left LA was because I discovered that I had no money and I was trying to figure out where that money had gone, and I realized that there was some bad faith actors messing about, and so we went through having to sell everything, pack up our little car and drive to Virginia and we were in her mum's place for a year and a half, living in Yeah, my mother in law's basement.

And so crazy when you look at from suspectively your success and what's happening online and what you've created, who you've collabbed with, you downloads, your streams, like it seems unfathomable.

I mean, even even I Love You, Please Don't Hate Me on Spotify alone has had nearly a billion streams. But you know, Sam, it doesn't sound like that is that uncommon, Like it seems like it's something that's sort of you have to be really careful about.

You absolutely do.

And I think I put too much faith in the people who I was supposed to.

And that's the thing.

As artists, as creatives, like we are as good as the people we the village we have around us. And it sucks that it's not a unique story and that it's happened to so many and you never think it's going to happen to you until it does, until you wake up and your credit card gets to claim you can't pay rent and move across country and live with your mother in law in Virginia for a year and a half.

Highlight.

Yeah, yes we did it. We made it.

Oh, I'm so sorry this happened.

It's okay, honestly character building, and I have an amazing team now and I've rebuilt and moved to London, and you know, I'm still building financially.

And it's funny.

The perception of me, I feel like, is that I'm well off because I've had this big hit and I've collabed with amazing, massive celebrities and whatever.

But it's just not the case.

And I think artists in general, we don't right now in this claimate with the way that Spotify and all that pay us, we don't really make that much money from our music unless you own your masters.

Well, Lily Allen just was recently saying she makes more money on a foot only fans she does from her music.

So yeah, that's what you need to do. No one wants to see my feet, but that way, they're great feet. But I'm not going to start.

Maybe if we go a bit further up, you'll do all right.

You know what I made? Okay, two or three inches will get me a long way.

But if you guys haven't heard Love Life, please go and listen to it, Go and download Sim's albums. Let's support these local industrytis. But I hope that we see you again on another life on Cut tour as well, and congratulations and everything.

I love you guys. I will come back every time. I love you.