FULL SHOW: Wag Days & Matt's Jungle Beard needs to GO

Are you ready?

Good pickup with Britt Hockley and Laura Ben?

Ready your worth? Our windows done?

My world risen the dust only good Babs all down.

I don't march, but you I'm not. I'll beget and what I want. It don't matter where.

This is the pickup, Hi, guys, it's the pickup with Britt Hackley and Laura Ben.

And there's been some terrible breakup news that's been sweeping the comic.

You're devastated, Britt, so sad. You were very excited about this.

I got sucked down a stupid rabbit hole on the internet, like deep deep into this rabbit hole. There is a couple who have set the Guinness World Record for the longest kiss. Imagine kissing someone continuously for fifty eight hours and thirty five minutes and fifty eight seconds.

What are the rules? Can you, like not have any breaking skin to skin?

To be fair, I don't know the exact rules, but I'm going to say it's got to be a continuous kiss.

Imagine that's been recorded. They've been together.

Since twin thirteen, that's when they set the record, and they just broke up. Devastating. No, because they're still kissing. No, they probably never want to kiss again. That's probably what it really was.

How would you physically?

I could think of nothing worse than being attached by the lips for what's nearly sixty hours?

Wait, they set the record twice. First off, they set it in twenty eleven with a forty six hour kiss. Then they broke their own record. Why go for it twice?

I had a hobby. I think that was their hobby. That's the point.

Do you have to practice for that? Like?

How many times do they do that privately before they did it publicly?

We should all take.

A collective moment because they look quite devastated.

They've broken up. Rip Is love even real anymore?

That doesn't seem like it.

Not?

Well, not if married at First Site has anything to say for it, that's for sure.

Well, we're actually not talking about married at First Site today, Laura. For the first time, I've taken a break. I've said no married at First Site today. But we do have a really great show coming up. There is a man that has operated on himself and you are not going to believe what he has done.

I'm going to tell you all about it after the break Grit.

There is a news article that is going viral at the moment. Well, actually it's a it's a surgeon who's created content put it out on Instagram. It's currently had four million views and it is accruing more rapidly. The reason for this is because he has taken diy or doing surgery on himself to all new heights.

I don't think you can take doing surgery on yourself to all new heights. I think that is the height people don't do surgery.

I mean, for example, you could do a minor surgery, like you could close your own elb up if you had stretched elobes.

Think of what else you could think.

There's a difference between stitching a cut rather than giving yourself open heart surgery.

Right like the or built the same he did stitch a cut of sorts to me.

So this man, he is a doctor, he's a surgeon. He's from Taiwan, and he streamed this online. Basically, he had three children and as a gift to his wife, he decided it was time for him to have a vasectomy. But not only did he go and get a vasectomy, he gave himself a vseectomy on camera.

Normally actually insane.

Normally a aseectomy takes like around half an hour to forty minutes.

He came out and said.

It took him twice as long because it was a little bit more complicated having to do.

It to himself.

He said, like, there was only one point in the operation where it seemed as though he was.

Visibly in pain.

He had to like put the tools down, He laid back, had a moment afore like processing what he was doing, and then he just got straight back to work down there, snip and cutting, tying up stuff.

That is next level, isn't it. He did say he could feel it even though he had a local. He's like, it still feels weird to be able to feel in your penis what you're sewing up. I actually don't understand the purpose of it. Just get put under You've got a doctor.

Friends, you know what.

He did say this one thing which I agree with, but it was particularly funny.

He said, I am really brave, and yes you are, Yes you are.

But also if your wife has to give birth to three children, this should become the normal men should be giving themselves vseectomy.

We've got to all have childbirth and kind of go through that.

I didn't do this to myself.

Don't try I don't mean that. Don't try that at home.

Everyone, No one listening to you is gonna go and try and dissect me at home or no, in.

Case I could get myself in trouble with compliance on radio or something. If somebody turns around and says Laura Burns said, and then they do it, I'm gonna lose my job.

Well, then we're gonna lose that job over a lot of stuff.

I remember, I didn't do it to myself, but my boyfriend at the time did.

I just got him.

He was a doctor, and I got him to bring some equipment home and I sewed up my ear holes on my bed like we just laid down at home and he sewed my ears up. It like a little operate We set up a little operating table in my room and he just sowed them all. That's like as close as I do it yourself operation at.

Home that I've ever done.

I wonder, like how much this kind of like breaches heaps, Like yeah, like breaches like legislation stuff around like codes of being a doctor.

They did it was in another country, so no one in Australia come for me, and that was a lie.

I made the whole story out.

Well, this did happen in Taiwan, so maybe they have different rules than what is in Australia. But apparently they did an investigation and he didn't actually break any rules by creating this content. Had a urologists on hand in case anything went wrong, so he had someone in the.

Room to take that. I mean, if you've got someone in the room, just let him do it in the first place. Lay back. You don't need to be working this hard.

Even now, he's probably the first person to have vseected me in himself.

Like, there's probably a Guinness World record in that or something.

I don't know if there is.

I think like, if we have another kid, Matt will then get a vasectomy. I'm pretty like Matt, no, I'm going to give him one. We're going to diy in our house as well. No, I think he would. I think he would be keen to. I actually don't. I think that if we had a third child, the fear of a fourth child would probably propel him to want to do so. His podcast partner, like my husband does a podcast Two Doting Dads with a guy named Ash Wigs.

Well that's pretty excessive, is it. Yeah, because the day after, like your feelings aren't well.

I normally know if it was the day after. It's very short.

Laura Burn's spinning those lines on radio. There is a mum being absolutely slammed online. She's causing quite the debate about if it's okay to have a four day school week for your child.

Now, let's set the facts.

Her child's five years old and she's only just started school, so it's like a kindy it's like that new transition. Have listened to what she said that has sparked so much anger For the first four weeks.

They have one day off on a Wednesdays, and I kind of want to keep that a thing because I love not rushing anywhere. I love the extra time I get to spend with my daughter. I love the time she gets to spend with her siblings. Like the rush every single day and her being gone for so long every single day at school, five days a week for the rest of her life, it just feels unnatural.

This mom's called it a wag day, so she wants her kid, her kindergartener to take well she I mean, she hasn't said that she absolutely wants to be back, but she was kind of a hypothesis, wouldn't it be nice if you could just send your kids to school four days a week.

I want to come to this mum's defense. I'm not a mum, but the fact that this has caused so much outrage and anger that like news dot com is writing articles about it. She's literally just given a throwaway comment being like, oh, it's been so nice to have a home for a day with her siblings spend more time with her.

I would love it if that could continue, and the Internet has like jumped down her throat.

Yeah.

I mean, there's nothing that we love more than getting angry about a mum who's not parenting the.

Way that we expect it to be parenting. But I think it's an interesting one.

Because we're all for the four day work week, Why are we so against a four day school week?

Well, I to learn, I'm against it. I need my kids in school.

I like a five days school week, don't get me wrong, But I think it also comes into this idea that like school and having a break because like, for example, like my little one Lola, she goes to daycare only three days a week, and it's really really hard for her to get into the momentum of when it's a daycare day and when it's a day at home, because the four day break in between means it makes it difficult for her and her friends. It makes her difficult to pick up from where she left off and she

Gets it done.

I think, to be fair, most parents love the fact that five days a week their kids are at school and they can get about their own life. But I also understand that there are people that think, hey, two days a week is not enough for me to spend with my kid. But you can't just I understand that, but you can't just have them to hang out like you still.

Need to homeschool them or teach them in some way.

You can't just be like I want you all to myself and delay their learning. And I understand that learning comes in so many different ways.

Like I have some friends that live.

Up north, like near Barron Bay and Queenslandy area, And I say that because I think it'll check out their homeschool. They don't homeschool, but they go to I forget what it's called stories, one of those schools that like they have classes as all outdoors in the forests and stuff, like they learn to count when they're young by like finding twigs and branches and discovering things. So they're still learning, but in a different way. They're not in the classroom.

Yeah, I mean, like a kindergarten doesn't need to no taxes. I mean, I'm bought thirty seven. I sn't know how to do my taxes very well. I mean, I think it's pretty harsh for her to be slammed for having these thoughts. The reason for that is is because as a new mom, she's got three kids, two of them are at home. This is her first year of having

It's really hard.

And so I can understand why she's saying maybe that this isn't the best solution. It's not like she's saying, Okay, she's going to keep a kid on from school and then neglect it and be a terrible mum.

Also, just relax. The Internet needs to relax. I truly believe that.

I think sometimes we'll get too angry about too many things.

You heard it here first, everyone just relaxed. From Brittany Hockley britt last week on our podcast Life on cart we answered a really important question that we were very aligned on, and that question was from a listener who asked whether or not she could tell her husband that he was going bald. She wanted to ask him whether he could go and get take balding medication because she was not loving the fact that he was thinning.

Yeah, and we did say that at the end of the day.

No, you can't go and point out your partner's insecurities and ask them to change it.

Yes, that's exactly what we unanimously landed on. But I have another question for you, and this one is a little bit more close to home. Do you think it is okay to tell your partner how you want their facial hair to be if they have decided to change it dramatically? I need more context, Okay, So imagine that you're used to your partner having a relatively can.

We just call a space babe, we're talking about your husband, Matt.

Yeah, we're talking about Matt. We're talking it. So this is very When I say close to home, I'm talking about inside my home. So my husband, Matt, he was recently on I'm a Celebrity to get me out of Here. On the show, he refused to shave his face. He grew quite the beard. Matt is not normally a facial hair hairy person. Like I lack a bit of stubble. I think it's manly and sexy. It's gone beyond stubble.

It's a beard.

It kind of still smells like the jungle. And I have asked him a few ways nicely if he would please shave it, because it's just it goes up my nose and I find it really hard to kiss. And I'm struggling with navigating around the facial hair and I've come up against a little.

Bit of resistance.

But maybe it's because I shouldn't be asking.

No, Okay, here we go suggest something.

You can say, Hey, I love you so much better, and it's more sexier when it's like shortaved or like my nose. But you can't hold the man down with a razor and try and shave his beard if he doesn't want to.

He can't.

But I do think maybe if you let him down the garden path and said, maybe it turns you on more when.

He's clean shaved, you like dangle that carroag I've done at all.

I was like, I was like, I will feel more excited about taking you down to Poundtown if you shave your face, and he goes, yeah, yeah, I'll do it tomorrow. It's been weeks, he's been home for weeks. It's getting longer by the day, and he will not shave it, and it kind of smells like jungle fire.

All right, let's give the man a second to defend himself. I actually have mad on the phone.

I'm sorry, honey, I love you and I find you so sexy, but the beid's got to go.

That's not what you said a minute ago.

This is absolute defamation. I I wash and condition this bed every other night and claim to your good listeners that it smells absolute don Also another thing. The one person who is your hall pass is Jason Momoa, who happens to be a very hairy man. Really mixed signals from me. On the one hand, you want someone very hairy, all of a sudden, there's a hairy man in front of you. You don't want him anymore? Which one is it?

Laura's Jason Momoa is my hall pass, and he is a particularly hairy man. But I think I think if I was to ever climb that man, I would discover that also his facial hair goes up my nose, and I don't like it's a sensory thing.

I actually think if Jason Momoa shaved his beer, he wouldn't be your Yeah, he wouldn't be a hall pass anymore. But what I will say is, Matt, you do you. I'm all for whatever you want to do, whatever makes you happy. But what I am going to say is been in Laura's defense. When I came out of the jungle last year, I showered, shaved, moisturized, washed, condition I did everything, and I thought that I was like cool the jungles left behind.

So many people told me how much I still stunk.

People like, the stench is still in your hair even though you've washed it, but I couldn't smell it because.

I was accustomed to.

You'd become one with the jungle.

So maybe maybe I know you're conditioning the beard, but maybe it's in there, and that's stench's in there and you don't know it.

Don't drag me into your your condition, Brittany, I don't. I don't know how you shall, but if don't, you dare compare me to yourself. Also, Laura, is it part of your body readion that you sometimes neglect in terms of shaving. I won't go into too much detail, but all I'm saying it's a little bit rich. Once you start shaving, I will as well.

All right, let's make a deal. If that's all it's going to take a deal, I'll do it tonight. Can you please shave your face as well. I'll report back on it tomorrow.

Everyone, Can someone send us some raisors. We need a lot. There's a lot to get through.

You guys gonna slide right off each other.

Send the hacks or everybody. Al Right, that's it from us, guys,