FULL SHOW: How HARD did you go for Halloween? 🎃

Come on in, Hi girls, Hi everyone, Hello, everybody so down in dumps on.

I just got kicked out of a subway a restaurant. I got a subway before the show, and you know, I don't know if you know this, but they say, don't lean on my glass.

Like you wait, how much were you leaning on the glass? Like your hands up face against it?

I was not like orphan Annie.

That also wasn't Annie.

I also got a foot log, so I can't possibly have any more. I order the biggest sandwich and she goes, do you want to toast it? I said, chuck that thing in, So she turns out to toast it, and I'm looking at the oven. So I lean on the glass and the glass collapses and falls into the meat.

No, it did, so then she can.

Fill its flap everywhere and little boiled eggs.

Wipe everywhere, you know, oak subway And she asked me to leave. Did you get your posted sandwich? I paid for it, of course she asked you to leave. You just smashed the counter.

Why would they make the glass fold inwards? That is ridiculous. People lean on glass. It's an Aussie rite of passage to lean so it.

Didn't break like shatter. The whole piece just fell in.

Yeah, it's on hydraulic arms, that's how they are. But it's like a boot of a car.

It just swim years laid on the side into the hand.

Wait, you thought it shattered like that shark movie where the shark head butts the piece of glass.

Yes, when you said that it fell, my impression was that it shattered everywhere. And I was like, well, firstly, she's asking to leave because it's a safety hazard, and secondly I was like, that's really embarrassing, and you've come in to tell this story just way too casually.

Did you get to leave with your with your sandwich?

Question?

The sandwich? And I paid? But she was pissed off.

Yeah, I get it. She was like a guy from radio.

Hey, you speaking of being pissed off. I'm getting married next year. So a lot of my online what's it called where all my lovers?

No, my algorithm is all very heavily wedding content.

But imagine you paid an absolute Moza for your wedding photographer and videographer and a woman with an iPhone turned up.

Because that has happened to someone mate, you would be so irate. You would be right.

Interesting, I don't even furious. What which wants to turn up to my wedding with an iPhone?

He will, He's like, I'm here dress, but I will, and I'll be sending the day of the mail all right next so I'm shu, welcome to the pickup.

So if you're new and you don't know who I am, I am Brittany. But I am also getting married next year. I talk about getting married a lot because it is consuming my entire life right now.

What an intro? It also means thank you.

It also means my algorithm online is wedding everything I see. You know when you're hyper aware of something, so like everything I notice it's all like wedding based content.

No, but that does happen. It's not just you being aware of it.

It's like when I when I first got pregnant with Maley, it went from being just normal content to literally babies.

Everything was babies. Yeah.

Yeah, I get a lot of food content all the time. So the algorithm knows is.

That's another story anyway, This lady this got me like thinking what I would have done in this situation. There's a lady online. She's not Australian overseas. But she hired a wedding photographer slash videographer as you do expensive, they're expensive, drop some bank on them. And then the photographer turned up with none other than an iPhone, an iPhone to shoot wedding content.

That is it.

I don't think it had like an attachable lens on it. I think it was literally just like here we are ready. She didn't bring a gimbal nothing, just the iPhone. I don't even know if it was the latest model. You put an iPhone into a gimbal and it means that it stays nice and steady you're running.

I don't see a problem with this. You know how many content creators exist that shoot wedding's pure with iPhones. I reckon it's their fault. I think they accidentally booked an iPhone only content creation.

No, No, it's different to have. No I agree with that, Mitch.

There's it's a whole industry to hire accessory people just to get that extra background content on iPhones.

That's the whole thing. I don't have a problem with that.

But if my photographer turns up, I mean, it's only got zero point five zoom.

What if I want you to get back and zoom in on me on something. There is no way.

That someone is booking a professional photographer their wedding and then they're okay with a person with an iPhone rocking up.

It is.

It's my sister's business. She does it for a living. She shoots weddings for iPhones.

Yeah, but she's not the main photographer. She's the accessory contact creator.

I want you to do your research. How much did they pay for this? Because Laura, how much did you pay for the professional photographer at your wedding?

I don't want to say, because it was a lot of money and Laura wasn't happy with her. No, I was really okay. I had a situation that happened to us. So I was really, really, really happy with our photos. Our photos were beautiful. But you only get one chance at all the important moments at a wedding, right.

You only get one walking down the aisle.

You only get one chance of doing your vows unless you get married a few times. You only get one chance at a first dance, at a kiss, all those things. My husband and I, we had put in a lot of effort into learning a first dance, so at.

That year, he was on Dancing with the Stars.

We've gotten one of the teachers from Dancing with the Stars to teach us this whole routine. The kind of turned into a bit of a flash dance, right, And so we had the videographer set up her camera on a tripod so that she could capture the dance from start to finish, real camera, not my phone. Yeah, and you guys were there, like you saw our first dance.

It was cute, right, it was. It was it was fun it was funny. There's a lot of bread left over, your cousins are.

It was funny?

Okay, So we really wanted to have our first dance captured from start to finish. We received our video back that had been edited down and it was all weird angles and close ups and it wasn't our dance.

It was like a hand here afoot there.

And anyway, we messaged the videographer and we were like, hey, can you send us the whole video from start to finish.

We'll cut it ourselves. We'll make our own we're content creators. We can do this. Just give me the raw data.

She sends it, and there it is Matt and I front and center in the frame for all of about five seconds. We come together to start our dance, and then a figure, a black figure, just moves into frame. The other photographer stood in front of the camera for the entirety.

Of our dance.

They did not get our first dance on film, would you be period? And we paid so much money for those and that's what we got.

See.

I mean, I don't want sorry, miss I'm interrupting. I don't want anyone to shoot my first dance because if you've seen ben dance, we don't need to in front of the camera.

Stand in front of the camera.

Absolutely. Well, eight hundred dollars I checked, so I think they are that's not much money. That's I actually think. I'm here.

Dollars is a lot of money.

Eight hundred dollars is a lot, but it's not professional photographer for a wedding. It's it's not unfortunately, because it's great as expensive.

Well, if you want, I find only your romance content creation plug for my sister. They got her to google everyone.

Yeah, look up, Becky, she's brilliant.

She's great.

Get a proper I like that. That was good.

You really got that in there, organic plug natural. It's almost like I do it for a leading cabis wway House. Thanks again.

Hey guys, it is Halloween coming off.

We want to know how hard have you committed to a Halloween clash shoe because we have one of our very own in this room that committed way too hard.

I had dinner last night. I guess what I ordered?

What did you order? That was terrible? That's a nice dad joke to add to your little repertoire.

I'm not a dad, all right, let's guest bomb a pickup.

It's Halloween in only two days everybody, and I know that some people get more excited than others when it comes to Halloween. Like some people really lean into the costumes, they lean into the decorations, they lean into the trick or treat I.

Don't lean in personally. Yeah, you're not a trick or treater Halloween person. I don't have kids. Imagine if I go knock on someone's house and I'm.

Like, trick or treat, No, guys, you would be surprised by how much chocolate you get.

Like it's actually insane.

The kids will come home with a full, like plastic bucket full. Could I take one of your kids just of the day, just so that I can get the treat Yeah, absolutely have one, but do it more frequently like the uther Enjoy art. Well, look what we're talking about is, you know, sometimes people take it a little

You know what, I stand by the fact that it was a fantastic idea. It went off without a hitch.

Who Yeah, what were you? Okay?

So I was Lady Gaga in the music video for her recent single with Bruno Mars died with a smile.

That is such a spacific cat.

Well, no, I get it because your wife, Diana is Filipino yep, and he's kind of short, looks like Bruno Mars.

Well, I don't know that she bland.

Short and Filipino. Bruno Mars Okay, Brunomus is short and Filipino and from a far away could be a lesbian.

I'm sorry. Basically, your wife didn't have to dress up.

No, you're beautiful like Gaga, that's a comped thank.

You, I'll take it.

But in the music video she has like blonde eyebrows, and I was like, I'll be honest, I didn't have a glue stick to block them out and put them put the concealer over them.

So I went, I've got to die. I'll just bleach them. You could have just painted them white. No anything, you could have done anything.

Any opportunity to dress up, and I take it very seriously.

You just get some white pain, like bleaching your eyebrows. Halloween is only one night, you know that, right, and this is a decision that lasts a lot longer.

You did do a good cover up job.

Thank you.

Have we died that?

I would say that most people would not know the noble ones died and then redied.

I think it's a gay thing. I think no, it is because we commit to the part. We're so dramatic. We're camp you are also and Grace and I we identify with that life choice and we I feel like we commit to the rock.

I do half fast anything.

But did you Okay, here's the question, because only in maybe a year ago, these bleached eyebrow was actually a trend people were doing it like Paris Fashion Week.

Was there any part of you that were like, this is a vibe, Maybe I'll keep it.

My wife really wanted me to, but I couldn't look at myself in the mirror.

See I committed. On the weekend, me and my boyfriend Stephen went to a Halloween party and we dressed up as Sunny Angels, which is little dolls that are a nude in a box naked babies. Anyway, you didn't get me that hardh I wore underpants. But what no one told me was that when I would lean over to get a drink, or i'd lean over to get some chips and popcorn, which I was doing every ten minutes or so, out my butt my ass cheeks would just flap out of the box.

I means, your quads look massive in this photo.

I know that that's really not the point of this, but no, I'm impressed.

And that's the most thing I think I've ever seen of yours.

Oh yeah, that's the absolute best thing you possibly could have said to me.

It's the only reason he wore that out. It was so people cold see his squad.

It was also meant to be a nude baby, so real jack nude baby? How did you over commit to the bit? Is what we want to George's called us. Hey, what happened to you on Halloween?

Well, as a former kid, I obviously had to do at Alpha bar. Yes I didn't just yeah, I didn't see the face.

Yeah, I did the whole thing.

Alphabet from Wicked Wei goed.

So you painted your whole body?

Yeah?

Basically because I just didn't know how to stop. But I think you know, after you like powder it and your your body is green and you get home and you you don't wash it off properly because you know you've had a big night. I had green. I had gritten my cuticles for months. Let me tell you that much like I was. I was tinted like Jaun.

You just look like a little bit green all over for weeks.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, it looks amazing. I looked amazing.

I think I'd commit to the green over the bleached eyebrows if I had to pick one. I think you could pull off bleached eyebrows, Brit drag Ye, I'll do it. That took no convincing whatsoever.

None.

I'm dressing up as a giant dinosaur inflatable dinosaur on Thursday.

What do you mean dressing up? I'm sorry that didn't really makes sense. Next on the show, what does me, a side alley and a leader of piss have to do with this next story?

I don't know, but it sounds inappropriate.

Again, I had a medical a medical mishap in the streets of Australia, and I'm actually not that embarrassed by it. I'm trying to empower myself back by telling you you should be Yeah, I wet myself. That's next on the pick up. What I'm about to tell you Britain, Laura and Australia should be embarrassing, but I am trying to push through.

There is absolutely no need for you to embrace this bitch. You don't have to share the story.

If there's ever been, you know and more more welcoming group of people, it's you two. No cynicism.

I don't know the story and I am all for you embracing your embarrassment. Thank you.

As you know I'm undergoing some medical tests. You know it's going on in my life.

And you do have a twenty four hour blood pressure monitor on as we speak.

It could go any second if you hear what sounds like an elephant farting, it's my arm. My doctor wanted a twenty four hour yeurin test. Didn't even think that was the thing people could do.

What's a twenty four hour year every.

Week I take for a whole day must be put into a milk jug every week? Yeah, there was no need for that either. It's our two leaders and it's a giant milk jug. It looks like a dairy milk milk jug.

So did you have to walk around for twenty four hours with that in your backpack?

No? I don't carry you backpack. I'm not a toddler. It was in the boot of my car like a sane human. Oh so my partner Steven, said, well, we still need to spend the day how we normally would. The doctor said, don't change your schedule. So I thought, okay, she gave me a little funnel. She gave me the three liter of milk carton. So off I went with my day.

You had a funnel. Don't you just put you Willy in the milk carton?

Well, no, it's disgusting. Also, it's a very small opening boy directly into it. Well, you've got to aim for it now. I don't want to do that. I got the funnel. I want to do it and do it the right way. Twenty four, I wake up, do my big morning weeks we all often do. I go out. I go god, I'm not having to Wii. I go I much to drink some water. I haven't had a week, so I drunk like a whole bunch of water. Anyway, my boyfriend goes, let's go for a shop. Let's go

This is more information than I ever wanted about. You missed. It's also where a backpack would have come in handy.

So what I do is I go, well, I can't wait into a toilet. So I go into a chemist and I grab a bottle of water. I drink that water, and then I go, all right, I don't need to now find a bathroom to urinate in. I then walk from business to business to business to find somewhere to urinate, and I could not find anywhere with a toilet. Then I see this one business with a doorbell and the back alley. Keep in mind, so I'm pressing this doorbell like crazy. I see your photo. I look at this photo, guys,

Says Tony may Or. I didn't even see it, Like you went to my office to.

We Why don't you just go in, you know, Laura.

I didn't want to embarrass Laura, so I actually pete in the street outside your office.

Why wouldn't you just go inside, which we have toilets inside the building, come into my work and use my bathroom. I would have let you, but instead you chose to do this in a Mount.

Franklin bottom and at the front of my office.

I'm just called it was in the back alley.

It's not even really a back alley, it's just a street.

Yeah, there were families there.

I'm so confused as to why you took this photo.

And I know it's because we have a radio show.

But I'm just gonna tell you that there's some things that happen in life that you don't have to share.

So you had a bathroom in Tony may.

There's also a bathroom in that building that you're standing out the front of. It's a communal bathroom and anyone can walk in and use it.

I knocked on that door, no one answered.

You just staying there this was the weekend. Oh it's shut. It's an office building.

Oh.

Because I was knocking, knock and knocking anyway, I had to go into the corner and peek into this friend bottle.

I am revolted that you did that. You could have gone to my shop, which is fifty meters down the street.

I also had to go back to the chemistry at a second because I needed to fill it.

It's actually discussing and you're unhealthy. Literally from the color of that whey, wow, you're unhealthy and it's got to do with your brain.

Great saleor it? Tony May? Though I did see through the window. What's happening in their great jewelry?

What's happening in there? Buggy plan another regatting place.

I love you, but next time, can I just call you and be like, hey, the owner said, I can.

Use the loo.

Just the next time you need to go to the toilet, go to Tony May and use the loo. It's just fain name the shop. That doesn't count for everyone else. Please don't all go into my shop and ask to use the toilet.

And speaking of burn, it did burn coming out this. Let's go home. Thank you for listening. Everyone will and what are up next? We'll see tomorrow see Unfortunately, yes, I delete that photo. Please