Laura and come on.
Hi, bye bye.
It's the pickup. It's Brittany jumping in first for once, because I'm always left a last.
It's true, you do you do wait your time, don't you wait? I can't get it a wording edge wise with you to Mitch and Laura, it's mostly Mitch. I blame her.
It's my job to set the scene. I'm the anchor of the show. So the Titanic gets I don't want to.
We know how well that went, don't we? Are you referring to yourself as a Titanic that went?
Now, guys, this is very unrelated, but it's something that I have a lot of feelings about tell Us. So I have just discovered it's a parenting thing. My daughter, Mully May, she's five. She's really into this thing called an l O L doll. Yeah lo O L Right, it says loll and then it says omg underneath.
Anyway, she's got a few of them.
The other day she was sitting at the kitchen table and she was taking off its little jacket and stuff. The doll is wearing lingerie blue row yellow g string. And now I'm having to go through all her toys and find out what things are and aren't age appropriate for a five year old. Doll's yellow string look at it, but is a G string classified as lingerie is.
Also a staple.
It is a staple, and I do wear G strings, but the G strings like really high.
It's not okay. This is a woman of the Nights. She's a night walker. My google lool doll. That thing has a she looks good.
This isn't a yellow No, that's an old doll.
Yeah, but this isn't what you when you said a yellow G string, I was like, oh, not too bad.
This doll is. It's like a BDSM doll.
It has fish nets, knee high boots on and a high waisted under Like that is too sexy.
Yes, I know. I bought this for my daughter. She's been playing with them four months. Well that's on you, Laura, that's whyfe for bookwek oh my god, look at this elol doll.
What oh my goodness me you wanted to go with coyote Ugly for book week?
All right? Next on the show, we have a pickup put down.
All the big stories of the day and the last twenty four hours Britain. Laura you need to tell me whether or not we pick him up or we put him down. We got some big topics today, including James Bond.
Pick up.
Let's just say his pick me up.
I don't think matter which one it is.
Well, he might be picking either of you up. He will be picking me up after today's news. Oh James Bond has not not on the team. We thought he was put it that way?
Which one I'll next day? There on the pickup. We do this every Wednesday. Everyone pick up.
Yes, I have collated the biggest news stories of the last twenty four hours from every leading newspaper and publication on Earth.
How big they have a readership of anywhere from a million to.
Three The scope.
Is broad, probably two b I bring them to you girls Britain.
Laura, you decide do we pick it up, carry on the conversation or do we put it down?
Never speak on it again.
Yes, and you've been drip feeding something that I really need the answer to you about James Bond.
Oh yeah, that's coming out very soon. Wink wink. All right, pick up, put down?
Reserving public park benches, pick up or put down?
Put it down? Put it down? But I need context.
Yeah, okay social media use.
It taped a four piece of paper that he printed at home that said reserved for the thirty first of the eighth from one pm. He then sticky taped it to a public table at a park, and the Internet obviously is saying, no.
You can't do that.
If you don't want to pay for a venue higher, you can't go sticking a reserve sign on a park bench. You have to get there in advance and make sure you can sit your booty on it.
To deserve it.
This is a big thing though, when it comes to like kids' birthday parties, because a lot of people had their kids' birthday parties at like local parks and stuff. And I was down visiting my mom and we took the kids to a park and somebody had glad wrapped an entire like little Deembo. They'd wrapped all the way
around this gazebo because they were reserving it. Maybe it was a crime scene, No, it looks like that, but no, I think they just had an eleven am birthday party and the kids were getting down there all be late.
He might be a witness, then the police might be put down. James Bond today coming out as gay.
Why, I mean, obviously pick it up.
But James Bond, who one of the characters, the actual character in the movie, is going to be gay or one of the actors has come out as gay.
Daniel Craig is gay. Daniel Craig is gay, No, it's not.
Daniel Craig, who played James Bond, right, was doing press for a new film he was in.
But of course the press were like, well, we want to ask about James Bond.
So out of nowhere they asked Daniel Craig and the director, is it possible that James Bond could ever be gay?
This is what he said. The Internet's loving this right now.
Do you think there could be a gay James Bond.
Daniel Craig shakes his head.
Guys, let's be adult in the room for a second. There is no way around the fuck that nobody would ever know James Bond desires period. Having said that, the important thing is that he does his missions properly.
Having said that, he said, Darling, I adore you, and he rubs the nape of Daniel Craig's neck.
I don't know if he'd be gay, he'd be bisexual with anyone.
Or anything that was hot enough Jamess Bye.
Yeah. I just think he would do what needs to be done to get mission done. I think that really is a pendulum that swings all.
Right, picking up putting down the last one today, girls, this is a pretty light one to went on a pickup put down committing fraud.
Legally we should say put it down.
But I think, as we established last week, I've committed fraud and you know, very sorry for it.
I think he.
Probably should put some contact in it.
Okay, I've broke into my ex boyfriend's house and I, you know, slowly signature and I went on a lovely holiday without him.
It wasn't that bad.
No, no, no, you might like this, Laura, because a trend is emerging from the United States. People are discovering there's a hack that allows you to get free money. Essentially wherein you write a physical check, say for one hundred thousand dollars, You then run to the bank, you deposit it, and before the bank have time to clear it, there is a brief window of two to three minutes where that money is available in your account before it's legally cleared.
So you run to an ATM between it being deposited and being cleared, and you take that money out and people are revealing, oh my god, free money.
It's like hack, it's back.
It's fraud.
That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
And people are going to go to prison. Don't listen to everything that you see on TikTok, is.
What I have to say. People are dumb.
Yeah, but it is a hack.
Though it's not a hack because you go to prison, they can see what you have done.
But I could argue it in a court of war that it is a fault in the system of the bank.
No, I don't think that will find you intentionally deceived the bank to take money out.
Mitch, don't try that at home.
I need a good lawyer.
Then, all right, Well, coming up, I want to talk to you about why Laura's my friendship has ended. That's not true, Laura, Laura tried. Don't dispute this, Laura, Laura tried to kill me on the weekend. I will if you keep this up.
James Bond Gay and the Life un Cut girls falling out of the same day.
Life un Cut is over that headline, but our friendship's over the business.
I still need that I got bills to pay. But the friendship, Yeah.
All right, cart wait that's next tomorrow.
They might not be a pickup because the girls are fighting Laura and attention in the room.
Yes, the relationship's over. We're not fighting. It's gone down the gurgler. Something did happen? It made me question Brittany, Laura is Brittany.
Let me ask you, this is the host of this sixty minutes so moment. How long have you been friends with Laura Burn?
Five point five years? We have been the best of friends for five point five years, and we see each other every day. Something that comes up every so often is just how dramatic Britney actually is.
Might be something that you don't know about her. So now she's gaslighting me. Laura tried to kill me on the weekend. She tried. You know what happened. I'm just gonna I'm just gonna call Spader Spade. We were out for dinner, having a lovely time, enjoying each other's company.
Open court.
You guys just kind of frized his best friends.
I never thought I would say this sentence.
Laura glassed me. Oh my, Laura glassed me.
She smashed a glass that cut me to the point I was bleeding, And then how much blood, brit but so much that it was flowing that the kitchen stuff had to come out and with band aids and bandages and stuff to stop the flow of blood because it.
Was going all over my clothes.
What happened?
Okay, so we were at dinner.
Firstly, it more was ironic because we were at dinner together, having a lovely time, enjoying each other's company, and Brittany was waving her arms around like an insane person, as she does when she speaks. So as she was speaking, she flung her arm back and smacked it straight into the belly of the poor waitress that was walking carrying some plates of food. It was a big story. It was a big story. And this port winded she was hunched over, almost almost through the dublings onto the ground.
So of course I gave brittle bit of stick about that. I thought that was very funny. I'll take over from here, so then hold on, hold it up, britt So then I was also talking with my hands. Very shortly after, and as karma would have it, I knocked my glass over and in a bid to try and catch my glass, I punched BRIT's glass.
And it exploded all over her. So what happened was Laura is giving it to me.
For almost almost smashing this glass, almost like knocking over plates. Yeah, and all of a sudden, now I've punched a waitress in the stomach. Into Laura's story if you listened to Laura's version, but the glass Laura's.
Knocked his glasses over that have like you couldn't write this.
The glass smashed, ricocheted, bounced up my blazer sleeve.
So all this glass has gone up my sleeve. And then of course it.
Was trapped and there was friction and I was panicking trying to get her off, and as I was panicking, the glass shards but like going up and down my arms and they sliced my arms open. I have not heard the end of this. It happened a couple of nights ago, and the end it's been carrying on, like absolutely carrying on. It was like you know, if you have diabetes and you have to go and do a prick test the end of your finger, or like a
blood test, a little prick test. At the end, she was basically squeezing the blood out of it to try and prove that there was blood on her anyway, So that's where we're at.
She got one single band aid and has not gotten off it for the last four days. All I want is an apology.
Really, Brittany, I'm so sorry that I glassed you. I really hope that we can remain being best friends.
And there was admit there was the admittle. She just admitted it. I'm sorry.
I did you get what you wanted?
Can we move now to the court of the pickup page.
The waitress that Brick wounded joins us. Now, Amanda, how are you welcome.
To the show?
She can't, of course speak, because she's just washed all vocal skills.
She just doesn't care enough to speak. It's nice to hear from you again.
She's there, she's crying because she's wounded.
Well, Mitch, yesterday you were claiming that you could walk into any cafe.
Are you just coming for all of us? Listen to Britta today? Hey, Laura, glass me mit your fat we'll talk about it.
Mate. You said you could walk into any cafe that you wanted and throw away the Hey just the usual please, and you reckon you could nail it, so we made you do it.
Guys, this is so awkward. Yes, I went to a cafe and just presumed that they knew who I was.
I don't understand why, neither know why Laura you made me do it?
Give me a glass.
We need to give you an update on the discussion we were having yesterday. So I brought to the table the idea that one of you two girls, Brittle Laura, should walk into a local cafe and proudly ask for the usual. Walk in as if they know who you are, and say, give me the usual. But it's a cafe you've never been to before, Mitch.
Why The question is why did you want us to do this? And where did this? I do you even come from? It's radio, Laura, there's no why, we just do it.
Yeah, I don't remember.
I think it came from TikTok, which is pretty much where all your good ideas come from.
Come from.
TikTok?
What day is it?
Who am I?
What shows this?
The thing is I can't do these. This is one thing about radio most you know how the people do like pranks and like tricks someone. It makes me so viscerally uncomfortable to try and prank someone, which meant that you had to do it, Mitch, and he was so confident.
I went to a cafe that didn't know me, and I walked in with confidence, and I asked for my usual.
Do you want to hear how it went?
I'm so embarrassed. I feel awkward already, but.
Yes, here we go.
Now, just so you know, I tried to go in hot with confidence. Here it is, Hey, how are you good.
To see you? Yeah? How have you been?
Yeah?
Good? Yeah?
Good, thank you good. I'll just get my regular please what I normally get.
I'm sorry so many people.
Oh that's all right, you don't know my coffee. I'm oh, I come every day.
She was not new there. I already feel awkward. Of course you feel awkward.
But she actually handled that really well like she She didn't really hesitate.
She was like, man, there's a lot of people here. You're not special. How long do you reckon? She's been working there.
For I asked her, do you want to hear?
Yeah?
Here we go? This is the follow on. Nice to meet you.
What's your name?
Robert? Robert? Yeah, with an R. Okay, I'll get my usual.
So my usual is a strong oat, flat white.
Yeah, oh, you.
Don't have to try and remember it's okay, Oh, it's all right.
How long have you worked here? A couple of weeks? Okay, yeah, okay, well now you know me.
One and a half months is not that new if you're going to a cafe every day.
But fair that she didn't know who you are because you've never been there.
Also, the poor thing she's going to write that down and wait for you to come back. You're never coming back.
That's the bad part.
No, can you go back tomorrow and just see if she remembers? Yeah, follow up, follow.
Up, because she thinks my name is Robert.
That's okay, go and commit. You need to go and see if she's remembered. Put it to her test. Wait too, maybe next week, let's do it next week. It's more upsetting for you that she had no idea who you are.
I know, that's a real coffee that knew.
He's got a pseudonym so that people don't know who he is.
All right. See, I'm dedicated to the show girls. That's what dedication to the cause sounds like.
No doing preparation and actually, you know, reading the articles and stuff.
Its dedication to the show. But I'm glad you did that though.
I know what you noticed, Laura, that that wasn't my normal coffee. No, that was for our producer.
Oh you're a good man. That wasn't your orders, my order because I got it for the team. Anyway, guys, we've got to go for the day.
I was going to go home and give her kids more naked dolls. If you missed that part of the show, you want to hear it. Laura is indoctrinating her kids step by step into what Mitch into what Knighthood well?
And what are up next? To drive you Home?
Podcast The Show by Brittany Bye Mitchell, Bye guys,