Future Tripping - S1E7

You're listening to the Paul Young Podcast. So shortly after our first podcast. the introduction podcast, I get a text and it's from Elle, who is a 16-year-old grandchild. And she drops me a text and she says, Grandpa, you know what you should talk about on your podcast? And I said, what? And she said, future tripping. And I said, oh, trust me, I will. And it's because future tripping is a major conversation piece for me.

And for my friends and for almost anybody that I talk with. When people are in crisis, future tripping is always a part of it. I can't remember a situation where it wasn't. And so we're going to talk about future tripping. It's a word, I'm sure I didn't coin it as I've said before, but it has to do with creating imaginations, fear-based imaginations, that actually don't exist.

that is outside the present moment. And usually there is some sense that we want an outcome and so we're desperate to get there. But in order to... future trip in order to create that imagination, we in some sense have to leave the present and go into a place that doesn't exist. I'll give you some examples. My granddaughter

who sent me that text. She wrote me a little note about future tripping and reminded me about a conversation that I'd had with her. And this is how it goes. This is what she texted me.

When I had to get ankle surgery, they thought I had cancer and it was a tumor. So you took me out to coffee at St. Arbucks. It's my favorite name for Starbucks. It's the patron saint of staying awake in church. But you took me out to coffee at Starbucks and just talked to me about future tripping and the fear of the unknown. And I kept saying stuff like, what if this, what if that? And you helped.

calm me down a lot and mentally prepare me for my surgery and it ended up being a cyst. But you know me and I'm a major future tripper and I'm always worried about what's going to happen. You really helped me to focus on the present and not the future or the past. And I feel like that message is something a lot of people need to hear. And frankly, I couldn't agree with her more. But that gives you sort of an example. I'll give you a couple more.

I have a friend who her and her husband know us quite well, know our children. And one day the husband gives me a call and says, Paul, you really need to talk to Em. I use M and B. You really need to talk to M. I said, what's going on? And he said, well, she's freaking out. I'm like, why? He says, well...

She had these symptoms and she went to the doctor and the doctor said, you know, it might be one of these four maladies, four diseases, four something, and all of them are potentially life-taking. So she's freaking out. And I said, yeah, I'll give her a call. So I call Em and, you know, for a while we talk about our kids and catching up. And finally she says,

Paul, why are you calling me? I mean, it's the middle of the week, the middle of the day, kind of unusual. Why are you calling me? And I said, oh. I should have told you right off the start but I'm calling you to help you plan your funeral. She listens for a second. And then she starts laughing and she goes, B called you, right? And I went, yeah. I figured that you want me to know who to invite, who you don't want there, what kind of music, what songs.

And she just laughed and laughed. She says, you know what I've been doing the last couple days? I said, I can imagine. She goes, I've been reading and reading and I haven't gotten any sleep. I've been scouring the internet. searching for what these four maladies are. And you know what? I am more confused now than ever. And I said, well...

We think often that information is what's going to calm our hearts because it gives us a sense of control. But oftentimes, it does confuse us even more or gives us other imaginations, you know, where... She's already at her own funeral. Now, I don't know about you, but I've been to my own funeral. And it really ticked me off that nobody else came. You know, it was in my imagination. Something had happened. I got a call from the doctor or...

whatever, and I ended up in my imagination at my own funeral. I have, in my imagination, lost all of our money and ended up by myself under the... Burnside Bridge in Portland in a cardboard box. I don't know if you've had those imaginations. If you want to know a gateway drug to future tripping, buy a lottery ticket.

It's unbelievable the imaginations that you have to deal with. It's like, so if I win this, and we always think that it's going to solve all our problems, right? Money is, that's the temptation of money. And if I win this, oh, what am I going to do? Who will I get for a lawyer? Am I going to use the lawyer to accept it? Am I going to give...

what parts of it to my kids? How am I going to do that? How am I going to figure out how this works? What friends am I going to let know? What people I don't want to know? Is it going to be a public thing? I mean... Just you go on and on and on, and I have a lottery ticket. I mean, the chances of winning are almost zero. So all of this came from purchasing something that...

I promised to solve my worry problems. People say to me, I'm just not a creative. And all I have to do is say, well, do you worry? And I haven't had anybody go like, no, I don't worry about anything. And I say, if you worry, you're a creative because in your imagination, you're not just writing out the future in some form that's traumatic and terrible, but you're also a screenplay writer.

And you're a movie director because those things aren't just flat as some book. You see them. You see them in all their power. Future tripping.

Future tripping will drive you out of the present and into an imagination that doesn't exist. All it takes is something like the boss wants to talk to you or you have a problem in a relationship. and you're going to run into that person. So you already have crafted how that conversation is going to go, what you're going to say, what they're going to say, how it's going to be a big mess. So why even talk to them?

Or you walk in a room and somebody like that takes a look at you. They might not have even seen you, but you've got the whole thing already in a movie inside your own head. Future tripping. The year I turned 50, I had this... crazy experience where joy became a constant companion. I was different. I mean, joy had never spent the night and I'm, I was just so.

overwhelmed by it and curious about it, but I didn't want to tell anybody about it. It was almost the sense of if I tell anybody, you know, Joy is going to realize that she had overstayed her welcome. And I didn't for like six months. And finally, I'm in a conversation with a friend of mine, Thad. And we're sitting at a restaurant. And it was almost palpably like it was Thad and I and Joy. And finally, I tell somebody.

I'm so, I so love being around people who are invested in the arts because they see things differently. And that asked the obvious question. So what happened six months ago? And I was thinking about it, and then I realized, oh my goodness, six months ago, I made a conscious decision to only stay present. to only stay inside the real world. In fact, joy had never left. It was me running into some imagination that didn't exist.

Recently, I received an email reminding me about a conversation that I had with this gal, and we were at a restaurant, and I was listening to her, and I said to her, she reminded me, so... is there anything that you can do about this situation right now? And she thought about it and she said, no. And I said, well then, pass the salt.

And she wrote about this and said, you know, every time that I start future tripping, I say pass the salt. Because passing the salt is actually real and future tripping is not. Future tripping is... fear wedded to imagination that pushes you out of the present and disempowers you. It is seductive. It gives you the temptation that... If you create all the possible imaginations, you can get control. You know what is opposed to future tripping? Trust.

And trust is one of the most difficult journeys that any of us go on, especially if you've got a damaged and traumatic and abused history like mine. I don't want to trust. And it also doesn't help if you've got a very ambivalent view of God, because then God is difficult to trust. When imagination is wedded to love, you get to stay present.

Because that's where joy is. That's where adventure is. That's where child likeness is. That's where creativity is. It's always present tense. But fear? It won't let you stay present. It will say, Come on with me. We can find a way to control this. Imagine this. Or what if this happens? Or what if that happens? We can even future trip with good things. People say, well, then what do you do about planning?

You plan in the present tense. If you've got an emergency also and somebody like a child is running toward the edge of a cliff, that's present tense. Compassion says, stop them. There's a verse. that says, if you're planning to go to this city or that and build a business, always say, if I'm alive, and God wills. If I'm alive, yeah, that's funny.

Because frankly, if you're dead, all of those plans won't happen. So when you plan, you hold it loosely because you don't know. You could be dead. You could have some major change in direction. We're going to talk about future tripping a lot. We're going to talk about how central it is to the issues of trust that we face and how much we are controlled by it. If you would...

Just keep a sort of tally of all the times you future trip today or tomorrow, all the times that you are not present, but you're in some imagination that is fear-based that doesn't exist. That imagination. does not exist. What exists is what's right in front of you. What exists is the question, what is the next right step in this moment? Who is in front of me in this moment? How do I want to respond in this moment? Or am I lost in some imagination that doesn't exist? Thank you for listening.

If you would like to connect with us with inquiries, comments, suggestions, stories, and more. please go to paulyoungpodcast.com. There you're going to find resources and any notes related to any particular podcast. Today, participate with love, do the next right thing. and trust the ripples.