Doing What's Hard In Life

So this is the episode that we stumbled upon , but I was looking forward to doing this . You know , I'm learning . A lot of people struggle with doing things that are quote unquote hard . Right , we struggle with doing the hard stuff .

You know , doing what's difficult , doing what's challenging , and I want to talk to you , I want to speak life into you real quick . I want to get you to understand that this is just a part of the journey , and maybe if we reshift or reframe the way we look at doing hard things , we'll have a better relationship with it .

Right To me , I don't look at anything as hard . I just say it's going to require more energy and it's going to require more focus . I'm going to have to be more intentional with my energy now along this journey , with whatever it is . So if I say something is hard , whether it's building a business , whether it's having a successful marriage , whatever it is .

It's just going to require a little bit more intentionality , a little bit more focus . I'm going to have to be aware of where I'm putting my energy . So now I don't view it as hard . It's actually just me making sure that I put my mind where I need to put it in order for me to achieve this .

So I'm going to give you a real life example , because you all love when I do this right . I love sharing the journey . I've told you this before .

I love sharing the journey with my son right now and where he's at , because I can remember when I was 12 years old and I remember where I was and what , how I would think , and you know friends and you know all that stuff . So I enjoy seeing where he's at in relation to where I was at that age .

So you know , we went and worked out and we went and worked out and we were going to the park , right , and we're going to the park and he knows when we get started , he's got to go through his stuff , right . He's got to go through something that we call Mike and drill make 20 left hand , 20 right hand , right .

And he realized what I told him is like , hey , during the summer you had to make 20 . Now we're in sixth grade , you got to make 20 in a row . And he kind of looked at me he's like , okay , 20 in a row , cool . Well , he got started . He didn't make 20 in a row , he made nine , and then he missed one and he had to start over .

And he looked at me he's like are you heard what I said ? You knew it was going to be 20 in a row . It wasn't until there was conflict , it wasn't until there was adversity , it wasn't until there was resistance . That now he started to stop focusing on what he had to do and he wanted to question are you sure that I have to do this ?

So , anyway , he started to go through it . I could see it was a sunny day that day and I could see him kind of looking at the sun . And back during the summer he

would do the same thing . And I told him during the summer I'm like , look , the sun ain't going anywhere . The sun's not going anywhere , but we got a job we need to do right , we got something that we're going to accomplish .

We need to make sure we centralize our energy and focus on what we have to do , instead of giving energy to things that we really , quite frankly , don't have control over . I don't know if the sun's going well , we can't control the sun . So , anyway , we start going through this whole thing , right , and he keeps missing .

And every time he missed , he'd always like , squint his eyes and act like it was the sun . So I told him , I said , hey , that sun ain't going anywhere . We've already gone through this one . That sun ain't going anywhere . Focus on what you got to do . Right now .

You're giving just a little bit too much energy , a little bit too much attention to the sun , instead of focus on what you had to do . And he said , yeah , but it's hard . I said , of course it's hard . It's hard because of look at where you're putting your energy . So , me and him , he keeps trying . I can see him starting to get frustrated .

And he kept using the sun as an excuse . And I told him , I said , hey , look , if you use the sun as excuse , you're going to have to run . You're going to have to run . And the running wasn't a consequence . The running was to get him to realize that when I keep giving my attention to things outside of myself , right .

So he misses , blames on the sun , misses again , blames on the sun , misses again . I told him . I said , look , you got one more chance . Like , stop blaming on the son . Sure enough , he does it . I said , all right , we're on the line . We got to run .

Before he ran , I told him hey , you will run however many times it takes you to run as hard as you can . When you run as hard as you can and you know you're running as hard as you can , you're done and we'll go right back and we'll try it again . He ran 14 times and here's why I have to tell you he ran 14 times .

It took him 14 times and he still wouldn't run as hard as he could . He wouldn't do it . So I said all right , we're done , we're out of here . We got to go . So I get the ball and said all right , we're going , we're going back to the car , get in the car . We start driving home .

So he's walking up to the car with me and I get in first and I take the ball and I put it in the trunk . I go , he goes to get in the car . I'm like well , I said you got to run home , you got to run home and we probably live like three quarters of a mile . It's one other way for him to get his conditioning the way I was looking at it Right .

So he was like all right , whatever . So he goes in and starts running home . So he's running home , right , and I'm behind him in the car and I'm just following him and I told him . I said , hey , his little buddies , and he's running home . And then he gets home and my son is like he's like , he's tired , right , he thinks he's about to go in the house .

I said , uh-uh , get back in the car . He's like what I said we're going back , we're going back to go finish the job . You haven't finished the job yet . You haven't finished what you set out to do . You had the intention you don't stop . You don't stop until it's done . We're not done here . So we go back to the park .

I said , all right , get back at it . I said the sun's still here . You still got to get 20 mates in a row on mic and drill . You still got to do it . Right hand , left hand , right hand . Go , go ahead and get started . So he gets started . But before he gets started , I told him . I said life's going to be challenging .

Sometimes you're going to feel like life is against you . You can't get right . It's going to feel like what am I supposed to do ? How am I supposed to do it ? Life's going to do that . You feel like the sun is working against you . The sun's not working against you , the sun is just trying to make you stronger , but you keep giving attention to the weakness .

When you keep giving attention to the weakness , or you keep giving attention to the things that seem like they're working against you , you're not able to use them for what they were actually intended for . So I told him . I said here's what you do . You got to be aware of where you put your energy .

You're focusing more of your energy on missing , which is around the sun , than you are on making the layups . So he looks at me . He says Dad , I don't know how to do that . I said fair enough . I said here's how you do it . You buckle down . Sometimes you got to grit those teeth . You know you know when you're really doing something .

You got to grit those teeth . Right , when you focus , you bite that lip . You say I got to get it . Sometimes you're going to have to do this in life . And I told him . I said , look , there's going to be a lot of distractions , especially the age that you're growing up in . You say you want to get to this goal , you want to achieve this .

There's going to be a lot of distractions , but sometimes you got to bite those teeth . You got to buckle down and be intentional with your energy . So we get back to the park and he starts going after it . Boom , boom , boom , miss . It Gets up to 16 . Misses Remember , he's got to make 20 in a row . Starts going after misses , gets to 19 , misses .

I'm like , oh boy , he's going to be deflated , sure enough . I start to see his body language and I look at him and said what did we talk about ? What happens when life gets hard ? What do we do ? He said I buckle down . I said okay then . So he buckles down , right , and I'm over here counting right , 15 , 16 .

And I started to notice that every time that I counted out , it would start to create this pressure , meaning I'm over here counting on the outside , but it's really affecting him on the inside .

So I said let me throw him a little bone , I'm not going to count anymore , I'm just going to let him lock in because , as I'm counting , he's actually focusing more on the outside than he is on the inside . So I stopped counting , I just let him keep going , and then I saw a switch . I saw a switch . I saw a switch in his mind go off .

I saw him buckle down . I saw him start to get for a lack of better words . He looked like he was mad , but he wasn't actually mad . He was just locked in . He was just centralizing his focus . He was making sure that he was more intentional with his energy .

He wasn't giving his attention anymore to the sun , meaning he wasn't giving attention to things that were outside of him . He wasn't worried about things that he didn't have control over . You see , this is what happens in life A lot of times .

We give so much attention to people and places and things on the outside that this is why it's actually hard for us on the inside . If you were to take that energy and siphon it off from all those things on the outside and use that same energy for you on the inside , guess what would end up happening ? You would start to see that you were capable .

You were capable of overcoming that hard thing . You were capable of pushing through it because now you have enough energy to do so . So he hopped back up on that horse and he did it . Not only did he get 20 , not only did he get 20 , because all he had to do was get 20 .

Good God , almighty , y'all stay with me , because y'all ain't trying to hear nothing . I'm saying he did it , he only had to get 20 , but I didn't count out loud , he just kept going and kept going and kept going and I said I will stop when he misses . And he finally missed . No-transcript . What is my point ?

I'm just using this 12-year-old right now as a metaphor for you and your life . And when he got done , he had this smile , he had this pride about him , he had this look and I looked at him . I said you see , you see , this is why I couldn't give up on you .

This is why I didn't stop , because a lot of times , what's going to end up happening is because we're going to give up on ourselves . We'll stop , we'll quit on ourselves in a heartbeat . How many times you go through something ? You'll be the first one to quit on yourself .

But if it was for your kids , it was for your spouse , it was for somebody else , you wouldn't give up . You'd keep going . You'd take a bullet for somebody else , but as soon as it gets hard , you would give up yourself . When it came for you , no-transcript up . It was chores for me . My mom and dad were teaching me through chores , the metaphor of life .

So I looked at him . I said you see now we didn't use the sun as an excuse , because the sun wasn't actually an excuse . You were capable . You were capable from the beginning , and here's what it did for him . Here's what it did for him . I don't care who you are , I don't care what you know , I don't care where you're from .

If you're 12 years old and you see yourself accomplish something that you didn't think maybe at the beginning , you were capable of accomplishing it , you're going to look a little bit differently at yourself . You're going to feel a little bit differently about yourself . You're going to have a new sense of self-achievement and what you're capable of .

You're going to say to yourself I can do anything . And sure enough , he looked at me and he said dad , I can do anything . I said , son , you ain't got to tell me twice . I already know you can . I already know you can . You just need to know that you can . So this is why we got to do what's hard sometimes . This is why we got to do what's hard .

We got to do what's hard and it's not necessarily the difficulty of it . The reason why we got to do what's hard is because of the refinement of the growth , of the evolution , of the development that's going to take place through us doing that hard thing . When you do what's hard , you got to understand alchemically what's happening .

You start the journey , you start the task , you start the project and then , through that time , you're going to have to become somebody that you've never been to be able to accomplish it . And when we do this , that thing will have served its purpose to get you to the next point , to the next part of life . So here's what I started doing in my own life .

I started to create these things that we call daily standards . Daily standards right , non-negotiables , things that I got to do every day . Every day , I got to do these . I got to do them , and some days it's harder than others . Some days it requires more focus and more intentionality than others . So I started setting my alarm for 4.44 am .

There's a class that I go work out at 5.30 am . I got to be there at 5.30, . We're ready to go . So I had two things . I had to get up at 4.44 . That's tough , that's challenging , that's hard , and I got to get my body moving at 5.30 in the morning . Why I have to do that ? Why , for what ? Because it's hard .

That's why you know what's easy Sleeping in wait till I get up and then going to go work out at 9.30 . But here's what I do know If I can do what's hard consciously meaning , I don't run away from it , I walk right up to it and I step through it If I can do that , I'm going to create a new version of myself .

And when I create a new version of myself , I'm going to have a new self-concept , I'm going to have a new level of self-awareness , I'm going to have a new level of self-acceptance .

And now I'm going to use this next version to get me to the next level , to the next iteration , and this is how we start moving up , up , up , up , up to higher planes of awareness .

So here's my point of this story , and I may have told you all this story before , but I'm using this as just another metaphor to get you all to understand that you're going to be met with things that's going to be hard , but they're not really hard . They just require a little bit more focus , a little bit more intentionality , a little bit more willpower .

It doesn't matter what it is Could be a divorce you're going through , it could be you healing wounds . It doesn't matter what it is . It does not matter . The reason why it's here is so you can become a newer version of yourself , which is a positive , because the next version of yourself will always be at a higher frequency . So you know I'm here to help .

However I can Maybe it's just a little bit of encouragement Know that whatever's hard , it ain't gonna hurt you . It may bend you , but it ain't gonna break you . All it's gonna do is Refine you . It's gonna make another version of you that's just as fine as the one before . Maybe the one that you had before . It don't serve the purpose anymore .

So life's got to throw you a couple of hard things so we can get you to evolve . When you start looking at it from this perspective , when you start looking at it with this mindset , now you'll move into the energy of . Nothing can hurt you , nothing can harm you . Everything is for you .

This universe , this life is literally doing all it can to see that you win

. You look at the Bible . If you look at , what was that ? James 1 ? I think James 1 too . It said consider pure joys , my brothers and sisters , whenever you face trials of many kind , because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance .

And let perseverance finish his work so that you may of your faith produces perseverance , and let perseverance finishes work so that you may be mature , complete and not lacking anything .

Good , god Almighty , y'all stay with me when I break this down that you may have joy when you face tough times , because you know that when you face tough times , all it's going to do is strengthen your muscle of faith , your strength in your muscle of self-belief , meaning knowing that you can do it . You just have to have a little bit of perseverance .

But through this hard trial it's going to strengthen your muscle of perseverance and then , once we get the muscle of perseverance to a certain level , now perseverance is going to finish the job for us , meaning it's going to extract and get everything out of it that we needed for the next iteration , for the next leveling up , for the next year .

So then when everybody sees you , they're going to say golly , what did you do ? How did you blow up ? Where did the glow up came from ? Oh , there was nothing . I just changed my mindset when things got hard . I just started to step towards it instead of step away from it .

I started to tell myself that if I can keep pushing through this , it's going to produce and develop my muscle of perseverance . And , before you know it , I'm stepping into 2025 and I got veins popping out of my muscle of perseverance .

I'm walking into 2025 with a little bit more swag , just a little bit , a little different energy , because I know that this muscle of perseverance is built , it's equipped , it's ready and now that's what's going to ensure that I don't lack anything . But you got to start the journey .

You are the one who has to step forward , who has to step into it consciously . So this is why we do the hard stuff . This is why we do the hard stuff . I tell my son all the time , and my daughter . I tell them the same thing , because I do it my own life . I'm going to consciously put you in positions that are going to be challenging you .

They're going to be challenging , they're going to be hard for you , and I'm going to tell you why I'm doing this . It's so you can start getting in the habit of when you see something challenging , you don't run from it . You buckle down and turn inward and say , ok , I'm centralizing my energy .

Good God , almighty , I'm centralizing my energy , I'm doubling down on me , I'm going to focus and this thing on the outside , it's going to be the thing that I use to catapult me to the next level . So now you start learning this , at 12 , nine years old , you're going to have a little different perspective around adversity .

I got a different relationship with adversity . I got a little different relationship with hardship . I don't look at it probably the way most people do . I don't think that it's hard . I don't think that it's bad . I know that it's necessary . So whatever you're going through in life , it doesn't matter what it is . We're all going through something , all of us .

If you're going through something , sometimes you got to remind yourself yeah , it's hard right now , but that just means I need to develop this muscle of perseverance . I needed to be a little bit more intentional .

I needed to be a little bit more focused with my energy and stop giving my energy to things that are not putting me closer to what I'm trying to accomplish . I use that analogy with my son .

His job , the goal , was to make 20 makes in a row , but every time that he gave energy to the sun , every time that he said it was hot , every time that he said it was in his eyes , he was taking that energy and splitting it and putting it in the complete opposite direction of where he wanted to go . We do this all the time in life .

I asked somebody the other day . I said do you know what you want to do in life ? Kind of . I said do you know what you don't want to do ? They said yeah , yeah , yeah , I know what I don't want to do . I said okay , then look what you're doing . You're giving more energy to what you don't want to do than what you do want to do .

Both of them are a choice . We both have that option . Ask yourself am I giving more energy to what's possible or am I giving more energy to what's not possible ? And that's a choice that we make . But you got to make the choice . But you got to make the choice .

You know , I'm realizing , along this journey of entrepreneurship , of self-development , personal development , whatever it is , I'm realizing how entrepreneurship really is . Just , I mean , it's the manifestation of personal development . And if you're an entrepreneur , if you want to be an entrepreneur , if you've been on your journey , you might as well be an entrepreneur .

You might as well . Because I'm realizing that through entrepreneurship , through being an entrepreneur , it's forcing me to do hard stuff . Well , isn't that the same thing with this personal development journey that we're on ? And then I started to realize the two go hand in hand . So this is what I'm doing , I'm creating .

A lot of people always ask me when can I work with you one on one ? Can I work with you one on one ? I'm like , ah , my schedule is wild , I can't . But here's what I can do . I want to start something a group coaching , a group support system .

If you're an entrepreneur , if you are a founder , this is going to be elite level mindset coaching , stuff that I do with my one-on-one clients . I'm just going to do this with a group . I'm going to do this with a group . I'm going to make it accessible , affordable for a group . I'm going to walk them through , because this is man I'm learning .

I am learning Mindset , spirituality , entrepreneurship , personal development , self-development , healing they're all interconnected . They're all interconnected . So here's what I'm going to do . Okay , I'm going to make this accessible and I'm taking people on a year-long journey . I'm taking people on a year-long journey and it's going to be an investment .

Please believe it's going to be an investment on your end , because I'm going to walk you through and every single week we're going to hop on a call and here's what's going to end up happening . You're going to end up building a community . You're going to have a support system , just like I did with the DG Mindset community .

But this is going to be tailor-made for individuals who've been on this journey , who want to start businesses or have a business . And this is the other thing . People don't realize .

When you're an entrepreneur and you're over here trying to start your own stuff , people don't realize how hard it is on you psychologically , because it literally is just you versus you , especially when you got to make your own prices and you got to do this , especially if you're on the founding , the ground level of everything .

So this is why I'm developing the elite level mindset group coaching for founders , entrepreneurs , those self-starters . It doesn't matter what industry you're in either , and here's the thing about me . I'm going to keep it simple . I'm going to give you frameworks . I'm going to give you processes .

I'm going to let you know oh , here's why you struggle with this in business . You'll see that it's actually linked to this part of you . You will see . And , more than anything , it's going to be coaching . So it isn't just me who's going to be doing all the talking . You're going to have access to ask me questions . You have access to my team resources .

All of that . This is my way of , I think , helping along this journey . All I've been doing is learning and teaching myself and learning more about myself , and going out to the world and doing this , the next phase of it . Just because you woke doesn't mean you got to be broke . I'm going to go ahead and say that . Go ahead and say that .

A lot of times in the self-development community , the spiritual community , we think , oh well , I'm working on myself . For some reason , they think that you ain't allowed to be financially free and financially prosperous . I'm done with that notion . I'm done . I'm finished with it . So , if you're ready , we're going to go ahead and get started in December .

If you're ready , go ahead and click the link in your podcast . You'll get a hold of it and I'm going to tell you exactly what you can expect , right , every week . We're going to have a live group coaching call Every week .

Right , I'm going to give you weekly , non-negotiable tasks so that way , you will stay accountable and move in the direction of where you want to go . We're going to have a small group mastermind . It's going to be a community of like-minded individuals . Right , you're going to have collaboration . You're going to have support . You're going to have inspiration .

We're going to share our successes . You're going to have implementation and support meaning , get hands-on support from me , the strategy

,

the

insight

from my team . I'm going to give you exclusive access to my mindset creation systems , too . So I'm going to give you my systems that I use to cultivate a powerful , success-driven mindset of how to deal with adversity . I'm going to show you how to take this mindset and personal development and then transfer it to business and development .

You guys are going to have so much information , so many . There's recorded courses there , pdfs , ebooks , all of that . It's all going to be in there . So this is the next iteration . I'm like you know , for 2025 , I told my team . I'm like this is really what I want to do .

I just want to coach these people who want to be entrepreneurs or who are entrepreneurs , and then I want to do retreats and that's really about it , and let's just go ahead and do this thing . They were like , all right , cool .

So this is my formal invitation to you If you're looking to get started , go to the next level in business and in personal development . Think of it as just one-on-one coaching in a group setting . That's all it is . So you know , I'm here for you . Keep going , don't stop . Don't stop If it's hard , keep on going . If it's challenging , keep on going .

If you feel like it's getting harder , keep on going , because through that , it's going to develop you in ways that you could have never imagined . And please know that I'm here . I'm here to support you , I'm here to help you and I'm here to watch you get to the top . As always , I wish you nothing but the best on the pathway to your results .