Unlocking Motivation to Overcome OCD

The OCD and Anxiety Podcast by Robert James Coaching. Music.

Hello and welcome to The OCD and Anxiety Podcast where we explore how to have a more positive relationship with anxiety disorders disorders taking back control so that you can start living the life you choose and not the one chosen by your fears. Music.

Hello and welcome to episode 369. I hope that wherever you are and there does does seem to be a lot of different countries represented in in terms of the listeners of this podcast so wherever you are this morning I hope that you are having a great morning and if you are though struggling with OCD or anxiety as you might know you can get a free session with me to get that you can head over to my website robertjamescoaching.com

there you can book in for that free session directly or if you prefer you can send me a message to let me know about what you're struggling with. In today's podcast I'm going to be talking about the the importance of motivation and finding motivation when it comes to overcoming OCD.

Obviously sometimes it can get very frustrating and we can feel like you know we can't find that energy to do the exposure activities or to practice the new kind of diffusion techniques or whatever it is that we're doing to try to manage the OCD so finding motivation and it may surprise you actually how I'm going to talk about the kind of ways in which we can do that but you know it's a really important area to to discuss as always if you find the podcast

helpful it'd be great if you could follow and like on Instagram the podcast is also now on YouTube there is Patreon as well so if you're interested in signing up for Patreon you can ask me direct questions there you can ask me you know about podcast episodes that you would like to hear about and i will do them.

Personally for you on the patreon so if you're interested in signing up for that you can follow the link in the show notes and that's about it guys i really hope that you enjoy if you have any questions do please let me know many thanks.

So today's episode is obviously all about motivation. And I think the frustrating thing with OCD and motivation is, you know, it's not that you haven't been trying hard to solve the problem of OCD. It's normally quite the opposite. People are actually expending an enormous amount of energy to try to fix it. And this was certainly the case for me when I was really struggling with it.

I was problem solving all day long I was trying to reassure myself and trying to have certainty about things because you know before I really knew that I had OCD and before I knew how to manage it I thought that that was the kind of best strategy even when I did you know know that I had OCD of course it was still very tempting and and very often I would still go down the rabbit hole of of ruminating, of problem solving, of performing compulsions, because that is the very nature of OCD.

This is what it does. We know it doesn't make sense, but we can't quite help the fact that we really want to have certainty, to kind of feel safe, to feel that we've figured these things out and that things are going to be okay, that the anxiety isn't going to come up and ruin things for us or make things too uncomfortable and so we keep performing the compulsions and you know we we're actually working really hard we're working over time because we're doing all of the things in our lives that

we need to do and at the same time we're actually kind of you know performing all these compulsions and doing all the stuff that you know most people in our lives are completely unaware of. So often OCD is this kind of silent problem that we're experiencing. Nobody else really knows what we're going through internally. There's a huge battle going on and actually we're having to kind of motivate ourselves in a way to kind of do that.

So it's not that you're unmotivated, it's not that you're not working hard if you have OCD. Most probably it's the opposite. You are working hard, but you're putting your energy and your kind of resources into the wrong kind of thing. So I wanted to share a quote actually today by the American, the famous American salesman Zig Ziglar. Bit of a random quote, but you know, why not? So here's the quote. People often say that motivation doesn't last.

Well, neither does bathing. that's why we recommend it daily and you know i think it's quite a funny and and uh and helpful quote because it just reminds us of the importance of actually regularly paying attention to to motivation and you know recognizing that it's not something that you can just do for one or two days but as i was just talking about we might actually need to be paying attention to it with a certain some kind of quality in the long term

to make sure that our motivation is actually being put into the right kind of things as i was just talking about it's very easy you know even if you are feeling motivated to put that energy.

Into unhelpful stuff when it comes to OCD to trying to problem solve it to trying to out think it or out maneuver it to outsmart the OCD to just keep on performing compulsions because that feels like it's kind of keeping the anxiety at bay but we know if we're doing that then actually you know that's that's wasted motivation so actually we need to pay attention to motivation we need to build motivation but we also need to be smart in how we are applying it

and recognizing the kind of pitfalls that OCD creates for us all day long you know it's so easy to put that energy into unhelpful things you know so first of all it's just important to recognize that now secondly secondly you might actually just be struggling with with motivation you know full stop that you're just feeling a bit down because you know OCD has been going on and you feel that it's just really difficult and you're not making progress and

you're frustrated and you're stuck in that cycle and if that's you then of course my heart goes out to you it's a really difficult place to be in you know so I think when when we're in this kind of place it's so important that we reach out for for help. From trusted people that are close to us that we don't keep that burden to ourselves sometimes you just need to try to you know speak with somebody else and see if you can find some inner strength from somewhere.

You know to to be able to speak up to somebody because often just reaching out and and opening up can help us to find some new reserves or some new inner strength that maybe we didn't realize was was there you know sharing is so important when it comes to to this kind of stuff but also you know we need to find ways to get inspired and i think you know other things that that are important are to you know to kind of explore.

Perhaps other people who have struggled with OCD, who are, you know, doing much better with it. You know, I really don't like to talk about myself in those kind of terms in a way because I really don't like to big myself up. Of course, I've struggled a lot with OCD in the past. My 20s were an absolute disaster because of OCD. You know, it was really difficult. I felt like This is a time where I should be enjoying myself and having a great time.

And there I was, I was just really struggling with OCD all day long. And, you know, it wasn't really a fun time at all. It was just a struggle.

But fortunately, I did get through that. that and you know although I would like to point out that you know it is an ongoing process to manage that OCD to kind of keep it in its place fortunately today you know I'm in a much better place with it and that's me and my kind of story with it but of course you know there's so many people out there who have overcome OCD if you go online onto Instagram there's there's lots of you you know, therapists who've,

you know, maybe they've struggled with OCD themselves and they've become therapists. There's all sorts of different books out there, you know, people who are talking about their experiences of overcoming OCD. There's a guy called Jeff Bell. He has a really good book about that. There's all sorts of different books out there that are really worth kind of reading.

Kind of, you know, people kind of giving a bit of an autobiography of their experiences with OCD and then there's also kind of more you know books that are kind of more autobiographical but from a wider sense they're not really focusing on maybe OCD and anxiety but they're you know they're talking about struggle in general the struggle that they maybe had in their lives of having to overcome obstacles and you know finding the inner strength to be able to do that personally for me one book

that I found really moving and really helpful was Nelson Mandela's long walk to freedom you know where he you know obviously a really inspirational person somebody who had an an incredible life but had to really struggle and and get through very difficult times in order to achieve all these things in his life and you know for me somebody like that is very inspiring and motivating you know and these kinds of people and stories stories stories in particular can really help us you know to to kind

of find meaning and purpose and motivation so if you're looking for some motivation it might be be worth you know seeking out some interesting autobiographies real life stories of people overcoming difficulties you know it can be it can be a really helpful way to kind of find that motivation.

Another thing that I want to talk about then when it comes to this topic is recognizing that motivation can only take us so far, that it is a kind of finite resource. And although, you know, we need to check in with ourselves and keep recognizing, you know, am I pushing myself today? Am I taking steps towards my values and my goals and all that kind of stuff?

We also need to recognize that it it is limited there is you can't just keep pushing and pushing and pushing yourself all day long you're going to get tired you're going to run out of energy and you know if you're pushing yourself too hard you're going to end up getting exhausted you're going to end up getting stressed and when that happens it's more likely that OCD is going to creep back in you know we need to have those

inner reserves to manage the OCD and to be living our lives well and so you You know, it's also very, very important to point this out that motivation can only take us so far.

And something that has been really, really helpful for me is actually building in over time different habits that actually support me, my mental health, you know, my physical health. In order to have the energy and the focus and the motivation to kind of be there more automatically. You know, so when we create a habit, effectively, you know, we just do things more easily. For example, this podcast, I do it twice a week. It's just something that I habitually do now. And, you know.

When I first started doing that, well, it was a real effort for the first six weeks to two months.

It was something that I had to really force myself to do because I was still developing that habit so I had to keep motivating myself each day to do it but over time after a few months of doing that it really just becomes something that you just do and so it isn't so hard anymore you don't have to motivate yourself so much you don't need to use up so much energy to do it and I think gets the same when it comes to you know to managing OCD when we get into the habit

of you know of not avoiding things of taking on real life exposures when they come up in our lives and actually allowing the flood of difficult emotions to come in you know with with that strength and resolve to know that those difficult emotions will move on again if we just allow them to be there in the the background you know of practicing refocusing our attention like we do in acceptance commitment therapy putting our attention back onto our values and the things that we

care about when you start making habits out of those types of things then of course OCD over time becomes easier to manage because those kinds of behaviors become your new habitual way of being and this is really kind of of what it's all about.

If we just kind of apply you know exposure for you know a few weeks and then. Kind of uh give up on it and say oh thank you bruno thanks for that sorry it's just my dog bruno being a pain. So, yeah, you might give up on it and just say, well, you know, I'm feeling better now. I've done the hard work, so I don't need to do that anymore. You know, I can go back to just kind of playing it easy and not leaning into my discomfort anymore. Just going back to avoiding difficult emotions again.

Unfortunately, you know, that's not going to be very beneficial in the long term. And you haven't quite got into the habit of, you know, of just kind of dealing with difficult emotions and, you know, and things that come up in our day to day lives, you know, in a positive way. And really, you know, that doesn't mean that you have to do, you know, specific kind of contrived exposure activities like every day for the rest of your life.

Really what i'm talking about is more of this general approach or general way of being in life where we recognize the things that we don't like the things that we fear the things that make us uncomfortable but we make a habit of saying well i'm not going to avoid those things anymore you know as an ongoing process of exposure in a way i'm going to be living my life doing the things that are important to me living by my values despite my fears being there

in the background and when we can do that and we really lean into that then of course that's the kind of insurance policy that will keep us on the right path with OCD and you know and we don't need to have quite so much motivation when we have made a habit out of those things so whether it's habits that are are, you know, to do with your goals and your values.

You know, things that are very interesting to you, your hobbies, or whether it's more specifically about, you know, actual OCD techniques and things that you apply that you really want to kind of cement into your daily practice. Or even it can be things like meditation that inadvertently really help us when it comes to OCD and anxiety.

All of these things we can develop into kind of habitual activities activities that really keep us on the right path that keep our focus where it needs to be that that help us to kind of keep moving in the in the right direction you know OCD just wants to take us off that path it wants us to play it safe it wants us to kind of you know to be to be stuck to to be not living our lives by our values and that's why it's so important that we just recognize that and that we take positive action

to get us moving in the right direction so there we go guys i really hope that you uh enjoyed that one today about motivation if you have any questions at all about anything i've spoken about do please let me know and i will see you next time.

Just a quick reminder that if you want to get a free session all you need to do to get that is to head over to my website www.robertjamescoaching.com and there you can leave me a message and we can arrange the free session and now just a quick reminder of my disclaimer any information that you view on my website instagram page facebook group or anywhere else or any information that you listen to on the podcast is for informational purposes

only and is not intended to be a substitute for actual medical or mental health advice from a doctor, psychologist or any other medical or mental health professional. Music.