Overcoming OCD: Easing the Pressure

The OCD and Anxiety Podcast by Robert James Coaching. Music. Hello and welcome to The OCD and Anxiety Podcast where we explore how to have a more positive relationship with anxiety disorders disorders taking back control so that you can start living the life you choose and not the one chosen by your fears. Music.

Hello and welcome to episode 419. Summer is not coming to an end but it is the the end of August almost and time is moving on so if you are struggling with OCD or anxiety as we come to the end of the summer and you would like to get some support with that well you can by heading over to my website robertjamescoaching.com there you can book in for a free session or if you prefer you can send me a message and let me know about what you're struggling with.

In today's podcast I'm going to be talking about the pressure that we put on ourselves or other people can put on us to deal with OCD to get over it maybe to get over it quickly and this is an important topic to discuss if you find the podcast helpful it would be amazing if you could subscribe I would really appreciate that it's easy to do and it does make a big big difference also if you would like to follow on Instagram you can my Instagram handle is

at robertjamescoachinguk so many thanks guys and off we go.

Today's quote is by the former liverpool football club manager and that is jürgen klopp and this is the quote the challenge is to stay cool enough to handle the pressure in the moment so that you can succeed in the future and with with ocd well there's all sorts of pressures that that we can experience and really learning how to deal with those pressures in the moment will make as jürgen second clock points out, dealing with those difficult situations in the future,

a little bit easier then for us to handle. I think this is a really important message. The pressure that we experience with OCD to get better, to get better quickly. To feel a certain way, to not feel bad anymore, to not have intrusive thoughts anymore, to have it all figured out, to have certainty.

Hesitancy all of these things that we are looking for that really are kind of markers of success that we might have in our heads about you know when I'm better from OCD this is how I will this is how I will feel when I'm better from OCD I'll be able to do this I'll be able to do that I won't have this particular problem and the issue of thinking about thinking about it in this way is really it's it's creating pressure for us it's making us feel we have to feel a certain

way or we have to achieve certain things to to have success and if we don't achieve those things then you know OCD is still winning we're still struggling you know and we've we've failed trying to deal with OCD and of course what that does when we you know when we don't get the results we're looking for when we're still feeling anxiety for example when we're still feeling some uncertainty whatever it might be you know we start telling ourselves well

I've done all this work and I'm still feeling this way I'm still uncertain about certain things and you know this is so frustrating when's it ever going to stop why am I still dealing with this I've been working so hard on it And I can really understand that frustration that comes up. But I think what happens is that we are, you know, we're not thinking about the big picture here.

Unfortunately, with OCD, a lot of the time, it's that we are demanding a bit too much from ourselves, but in a very kind of specific way. When we think about the fact that when we are really getting stuck with OCD, it's almost like we're kind of scratching our skin and we're scratching and we're scratching and we're scratching so much up until the point where we might even begin to hurt ourselves a little bit.

That we're kind of creating a wound by, you know, repeatedly thinking about something again and again and again and performing compulsions around that thing. Effectively, that's what we're almost doing. We're kind of creating this wound again And in order for it to get better, well, we have to give it time and space to heal.

If we demand for that thing to just heal straight away, if we put too much pressure on that healing and, you know, say that we have to be ready in a certain time, well, that tends to backfire. And if we take another football or soccer analogy, for you American listeners.

You know, if you take a player that's been injured, you know, if they try to rush that player back too quickly, when they haven't really had, you know, a chance to kind of heal and to recover, to get better, then you're likely going to kind of make that injury worse.

You know and it's it's not going to be good maybe you'll get half a game out of them but you know in the long run that's really going to backfire and I think that's what we do sometimes when we put ourselves under too much pressure to feel a certain way you know or to kind of resolve the OCD quickly and actually learning to to recognize that this process has its own kind of rhyme and rhythm to it and that you know we really can learn how to uh how to let go of of certain thoughts

how to allow certain wounds to to heal so that we do begin to to feel over time a bit more certain about things but in order for us to kind of get that feeling of having a bit more certainty about things the paradox of OCD involves us first of all just recognizing that there is a little bit of uncertainty about some of the things that we might struggle with. That doesn't mean that you have to allow a huge amount of uncertainty. It can sometimes just be a little glimmer of uncertainty.

But when we do that, when we say it's okay, I'm allowed to feel this way. It's okay if I still have anxiety. It's okay if I still have uncertainty.

You know I can still create meaning I can still get out there and live my life anyway when we do that well actually we give ourselves the opportunity to kind of begin that healing process a bit more and to you know to kind of move past that thing and in the in the process well you know you you may find that actually that that thing that has been worrying you for so long or that you know that you have been looking for a little bit of

certainty around suddenly you do Do feel a bit more certain about it, but it's not because you've thought about it and you've figured out what the problem is or how to resolve it through, you know, your analytical thinking skills. You've managed to figure it out from not doing anything other than just leaving it alone and learning how to live a little bit more in the present to focus on other things. And in the process, that's allowed that thing to heal.

You've brought more acceptance to it. and then you begin to be able to see a bit more truth around those those those kinds of things so you know this is i think a really important part of the process with ocd you know not putting up trying not to put ourselves under pressure that doesn't mean that we shouldn't aim to get better of course we should but we also need to recognize that it's a process and sometimes you know it is going to take a bit of time and patience is is needed at times so there

we go guys I really hope that you enjoyed that one if you have any questions at all about anything I've spoken about today do please let me know and I will see you next time just a quick reminder that if you want to get a free session all you need to do to get that is to head over to my website www.robertjamescoaching.com and there you can leave me a message and we can arrange the free session.

And now just a quick reminder of my disclaimer any information that you view on my website Instagram page Facebook group or anywhere else online or any information that you listen to on the podcast is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for actual medical or mental health advice from a doctor psychologist or any other medical or mental health professional. Music.