New Theme, Same Trap: Outsmarting OCD’s Shapeshifting

Music. Hello and welcome to the OCD and Anxiety Podcast, where we explore how to have a more positive relationship with anxiety disorders, taking back control so that you can start living the life you choose and not the one chosen by your fears. Music.

Hello and welcome to episode 482 i hope that you're doing very well today and before we jump into today's episode just a quick reminder if you're feeling stuck with ocd or anxiety and want some support i offer a free 30-minute discovery call it's a chance for us to chat about where you're at, what you're struggling with, and whether coaching might be a good fit for you. You can book now at robertjamescoaching.com. The link is in the show notes.

Now, on to today's episode. Just when you thought you were making progress and boom, a new OCD theme pops up out of nowhere and it really catches you out.

Of course, when this happens in OCD, and unfortunately it does happen, we find ourselves really caught off guard maybe we'd been managing the OCD much better but now this new theme has come along and we feel like suddenly we have to figure it out we have to have certainty about it and we find ourselves back in the in the OCD trap today's episode is really all about that and giving you some tools to be able to kind of let go of new themes before they actually become a problem.

When I was still really struggling with OCD, I would get so frustrated when new themes would come up. In fact, you know, I would spend a lot of time trying to avoid new themes. You know, I maybe wouldn't kind of read anything about OCD because, you know, I didn't want to kind of get triggered by something new or perhaps I would avoid podcasts or things like that. Yeah, and this is not a good place to be because, you know, we are going to get triggered sometimes.

Sometimes we're going to come across stuff that we really don't like.

And if our approach to managing OCD is actually one of avoidance where, you know, we're trying not to come into contact with anything that we find triggering at all. Well, you know, that's likely to keep us stuck. And we are going to come across those things sometimes in our everyday life, you know. And so acknowledging that and trying to bring acceptance to that is actually, of course, a much better thing to do than trying to constantly avoid all of those things.

And here's a story from my own life in regards to this. When I decided to become a coach, you know, it was a good number of years ago now, but, you know, at that time, I remember kind of putting it off. And part of the reason for doing that is because I was thinking, well, if I'm going to be working with people with OCD, you know, I don't necessarily want to kind of be triggered by all of these different themes that people are going to tell me about?

What happens if I get triggered by their themes? And what I realized is, and actually what I found out once I started working with people with OCD, is that it's not like that at all. That yes, of course, perhaps sometimes I might get triggered by somebody's theme and that can be quite difficult at times.

But the reality is that getting triggered is not the problem the problem is when we're actually performing those compulsions you know when we're kind of going down rabbit holes and we're trying to have certainty about things we're trying to kind of figure things out so you get triggered by something and then you're like oh no this could become a new theme that would be terrible and suddenly now you're creating anxiety you're creating fear about that theme and you're

trying to disprove it or you're trying to figure it out. And because you're now thinking about it so much, you know, you're performing compulsions effectively. You're trying to reassure yourself. Well, now you're turning it into potentially a new theme. But what I discovered in my situation, you know, what it was, is that actually I didn't have to do that at all. In this situation, you know, I could be triggered by something.

But actually, if I didn't allow myself to ruminate on it, if I practice acceptance commitment therapy and I came back to the present moment, I allow the uncertainty and the anxiety to be there in the background. Well, I could come into contact with all sorts of different potentially triggering ideas or themes, but they wouldn't trigger me because effectively I wouldn't allow them to trigger me.

And this is an incredibly empowering thing when you realize this that actually it doesn't matter what new themes are out there it doesn't matter uh if they if they trigger you because you know things will trigger you but as we talk about a lot on this podcast you know when you get triggered what what tends to happen is your your sympathetic nervous system is coming online there's an idea a thought.

An image, a sensation, something that you don't like, and you're experiencing it now, and then, you know, your thoughts start becoming catastrophic.

Like, oh no, what if this becomes a new theme for me? How will I deal with that? How will I cope with that? You've really been triggered by it.

And the reality is that, you know, in that moment, there's a kind of choice that you can make you know you don't have to go down that OCD rabbit hole I know it can feel like you have to in these situations but again that's just a trick of the OCD OCD loves to persuade us that you know we're about to lose control we're going to start ruminating and we're going to go down that rabbit hole but that's just a trick of the mind. The reality is that the ball is in your court.

You do kind of get to decide, you know, what happens next. And, you know, when you realize that, it's incredibly empowering. And this is something, you know, that is, you know, has been very, very helpful for me, obviously, in my own life, that now I can coach people every day.

And, you know, I obviously, you know might get triggered sometimes but it never becomes OCD or very rarely because I'm able to kind.

Of keep myself on on the right path so here are some tips for things that you can do if you find that OCD is trying to catch you out with a new theme number one tell yourself of course it's changed this is exactly what OCD does OCD loves to try to find new things to kind of catch you out with perhaps you're feeling more certain about something and so now it tries to give you something else that you know you've not thought about before and of course then you're going to suddenly start

feeling much more uncertain but if you recognize that actually there's an underlying pattern here and that is uncertainty OCD is uh is kind of doing the same thing it's trying to create uncertainty it's trying to make you ruminate it's trying to get you to kind of look for reassurance it's just a different theme but the underlying pattern is the same and when you recognize that actually the underlying pattern is the same that nothing has really changed other

than you know the object of that i think that can can help you to kind of give yourself permission to say i don't need to worry about this this new thing i recognize that it's a new idea or it's a new thought but actually underneath that the pattern is the same it's still OCD so actually I don't need to go down this rabbit hole. Another tip is to not treat this new theme like it's special in some way. I think when a new theme pops up out of the blue, we can kind of put it on a pedestal.

We can feel like, well, this really does need my attention. This is bad or this is dangerous or this is threatening. So, you know, I really do need to kind of take care of it. But again, it's a trick of the OCD. It's not anything that needs your attention at all. It's exactly the same as the other theme. It's just about uncertainty. But because it's new, we tend to think that we need to kind of take care of it, that it's special in some way.

And it really isn't. And the only way of proving that to yourself, though, is actually kind of making sure that you step away from it.

Try postponing doing anything with that new thought for at least an hour or two and when you're able to do that when you're able to say okay i recognize that this is a new thing i'm really wanting to kind of get into it to figure it out but actually i'm going i'm going to do myself a favor here i'm going to postpone doing anything about it at all for at least two hours And during that time, you're going to do your best to focus on other things.

You know, helpful, positive things, fruitful things, things that are related to your values and your goals. And you might find that when you come back to it, you don't want to think about that thing so much anymore. Tip three is to kind of double down on what you were already doing that was working. So often, you know, we we've been listening to podcasts or you've been reading books or you've been learning about OCD.

Perhaps you've been practicing techniques or maybe you're working with somebody and you know you've been making some progress but now this new theme has come along you feel like you're kind of going back to square one and you're not at all it's really important to recognize that any progress that you've made it's still there it's locked into your nervous system and you're not at all You know, and perhaps now because this new theme has come along,

you've stopped doing some of those new techniques or new behaviors that you've been learning. You know, and so it's so important that we go back to what was actually working for us and apply it to this new thing. You know, and when we do that, well, you know, you may be surprised that actually. You know, things start working again. That, you know, this new shiny thing doesn't actually need to kind of be taken care of.

It's not something that you need to pay attention to and finally try to remind yourself that change isn't bad you know perhaps if your themes are changing it's a sign that you know some some of the things that you're doing to try to manage the OCD are working maybe you've had an old stubborn theme that you've had for a long time and and maybe you've been learning how to bring more acceptance to that it isn't bothering you as much anymore and so

perhaps you know you know because that's happened the OCD is now trying to find a new thing you know to catch you out with so it could be a sign that you know you're you're making a bit of progress with OCD but anyway you know whether it is that or or not having the kind of flexibility the mental and emotional flexibility to be able to deal with new themes you know whenever they come up is actually a positive thing because if you have that flexibility well

it doesn't matter what ocd throws at you moving forward you're going to be much better at dealing with it no matter what kind of themes come up and so if you can view it as a challenge rather than a threat i think that's something else that can be really really helpful so many thanks i really really hope that you enjoyed that please do remember i offer a free discovery call to get that you can head over to my website robertjamescoaching.com or you can follow the link in the show notes here.

Many thanks and I will see you next time. And now just a quick reminder of my disclaimer. Any information that you view on my website, Instagram page, Facebook group or anywhere else online or any information that you listen to on the podcast is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for actual medical or mental health advice from a doctor, psychologist or any other medical or mental health. Music.