The Nicky Glizer Podcast Nick Glaser post.
Here's Niki.
Hello, here, I am welcome to the show. It's Nicki Glazer podcast. Fun show for you Today. We have as always Brian and Noah, Hey guys, hello, and then via Zoom, who you know and hasn't been on the show for about three weeks but favorite of the show Sean O'Connor hi excited to be here.
Over zoom my favorite way to perform.
It's the worst.
Did you guys do any shows in COVID over zoom? What did you do?
I mean, I think I.
I initially was like, yes, the world shut down, like everyone's gonna be as bad at stand up as I am because we're all not doing shows. And then shows started popping up and I was seeing footage of people doing them, so I said yes to one, and then it just felt so unlike a stand up show that I was like, oh, people are getting better from doing these I can just not do these'.
That's kind of how it felt. Did you guys do some?
I played Quiplash on like for an audience with like we have guests on and like it was very fun, but it was not stand up I mean you could just do stand up in your mirror and it would be the same thing.
Yeah, and I don't think that there's anything wrong with doing that. I think it would be good sometimes to practice stand up more. I think we convince ourselves like you have to do it in front of the audience. No, it doesn't count. I mean, yeah, you don't know if something's funny or not doing it in the mirror. But I think it would help to practice to nobody.
Oh yeah, when I write new jokes, I like just pace around my living room like talking to myself, and that's kind of like just performing it. It's just like you can kind of sense when something has at least the cadence of a bit, and then it helped. Yeah, sitting down and just like writing a stand up bit is like nearly impossible. I think, walk around and talk it out.
I've tried to do that. I've tried to like or I'm like, I'm gonna sit down on my computer and write stand but it just feels like you're writing a memoir that sucks.
Oh my god, it so does. That's what I did yesterday. I like went and wrote a memoir and it did feel like a chapter. I was like this could just be a chapter of a book I'm writing, and it's like it's not the same, You're right and it, but it did feel like I accomplished something just by doing it.
I yeah, I had a pretty productive yesterday. Yesterday it didn't work out, but I realized the only reason I really need to work out is so that I can do something that feels like really hard and get past it, and then I have self esteem for the rest of the day because I did something that like I wanted to quit, but I went past it. So as long as I do anything that is something I don't want to do and persevere, I could have that euphoric I worked out feeling the whole day. I don't need to
always do a workout class. I think the workout class is just the easiest way to get that feeling done. But yesterday I just went to Starbucks and like forced myself to write out this that I've been.
That actually told on the podcast.
And then someone wrote to me and was like, you should make that a stand up bit, and I was like, oh, I never even.
Thought about that.
So I just wrote that out yesterday and I felt so accomplished after doing it. I was like I don't need to go hold a plank now, Like that was the equivalent for my brain. You just need to do one thing a day that you hate it so much.
And that book that I'm reading about breaking through blocks or what, I forget what it's called, that just sounds like I think that, but it's just yes, it's telling me that, like when you yeah, when even and then we all know this, like even just the little like every single thing needs to start with someone typing one word. Like every movie you've watched was a guy sitting down and it was one word at one point.
It was like it period, like living room.
Dash, like everything started with one step, and I think that we I it's the most dumb, this non profound thing I've ever said in my life. But of course, like it's just a nice reminder of like I can't I can't look at like, oh my god, I've got to write twenty more new minutes of stand up. It's like, why don't you write twenty seconds? Try that, and that will then lead to the next Like everything has to
be about the it's all or nothing for me. So if I can't write twenty new minutes in one sitting, I just don't even want to do it.
The difference between that and like working out, though, is like you can't fuck up working out, like if you worked out at all, even if it was bad, you're always going in the positive direction. You could sit there and try to write for like two hours and get nothing done and then feel shitty, but you can't go to the gym for two hours.
No, no, I disagree. I think it's this.
I think it literally is the exact same, because even if you're writing complete trash and it's just words that you'll never use, you are you're doing the artist's way, which is like they always in the artist way. She says, to wake up every morning and write three pages of just none sense, like just get your dirt out of your brain, like get it out, release anything that's not
like anything you would say. And that is sometimes when I go to a class, I'm my hips aren't up, I'm not going all the way down on my squat like it's it's trash. It is like it feels like I accomplished. I almost went backwards in terms of what.
So wild, because I feel the exact opposite. I feel like when I write, if I write trash, I feel like I didn't get my hips up during the time.
It's the same. It is the same thing, but you did something getting your hips, like doing it holding a plank at all. Without your hips ups, it's still something you're like you're getting You're dusting off the shelf in order to then take the books off and rearrange it, like you're not you. At least you dusted something off. You got trash out that needed to get out for that good idea to come through.
Ultimately, do you agree.
Shot, I completely agree. I feel like with writing especialty, like everything could be fixed, Like like even if you did something that was completely shitty and you did it for like two hours and you hate it when you reread it, you can fix anything. Like their delete button exists for a reason. And I'm I love rewriting. It's my favorite thing in the world.
But you have to go back and read the thing that you wrote. Then see that's the problem for me.
I want to know.
I want to just send you guys this story and go like what do you think, and then like let's talk, Like I don't want to look at it again. I want to just I don't I'm not good at reviewing ever anything.
I don't you want to be an old Irish woman who throws it into the ocean.
Yeah, jurn and burn like you. That's what my friend Kirsten used to do. She's journal and then she burns it, and so it's like yeah, but I mean, I don't, I don't know it.
Just I would love is it. I would love AI to be in my pocket and to just be recording every single thing I said, especially when I'm hanging with my friends and I'm feeling real comfortable, and then just to take note of everything I ever said in my life, and take note of the times when it's like that could be a bit here's what it was written out.
You just need friends to tell you to fucking write shit down.
Nobody tells me to write shit down.
That's the problem. We all need to do that more for each other. Like Sean, I think I've done it to you a bunch on the road where I'm like no, I go like, write that down, and then we both laugh like we're not really actually good, and I go, no, literally, take.
Out your phone right now.
I want to watch you write it down, because it's it feels so stupid to just completely derail a conversation where you're like just comfortable and relax like you were saying, and then like get out your phone and like jot it down. But it's you gotta do it, and you gotta have friends that are going to force you to do it in the same way, like even if you're listening and you're not a writer or something like, in the same way that like, if your friend looks cute, take a fucking picture of them.
Take a picture of your friend.
They need it for their socials, they need it for their online profile, especially if they're a single guy. Take pictures of your single guy friends when they look handsome. If you have any kind of photography skill whatsoever, they desperately need it.
It will help them so much. Men don't have pictures of themselves.
So we all need like to encourage each other like hey, wait, no, I'm serious, Like you need to do that.
You should make that into something you know.
Uh, it's because it just takes a little push. I mean, none of us would be doing what we're doing today. I think if it was just all reliant on our own selves to be like I think I'm good at this, I should do this, Like didn't it take someone going like, yeah, you're you're like just a little nudge.
That's why I'm saying it could be AI. All we need is an AI assistant to do it doesn't need to be We need.
To just support our friends more. I feel like, I mean, I'm like watching like, uh, I completely am done with Twitter. I'm never going back on it. Hell yeah, because it's way too good. Whoa, it sucks so much. I hate it, but everyone is so negative about every little thing. Uh. And I feel like through reading that this weekend, I was just like, I need to be more supportive of all my friends. Like, if they have like a good idea, I'm going to push them. I'm not going to take
a picture of them if they're single. That will That's a weird thing for me to introduce to my friend group.
Yeah, okay, but I think it would help them honestly, Like, if you're like, you look cool, man, I know you. You probably can't do that. I can't expect you to do that. I mean it would be great if you did, because then your friend could find love and like happiness in this world.
But that's okay.
I want them to. I want them to. It's just it's what I've known most of the people I've known for like more than fifteen years, and.
That would be a Drassic shift for you.
It would. It would make it seem like I just got word that I'm getting canceled, and now I'm trying to show that up.
That these people are friends with you. Yeah, you're trying to get alibis that's.
Really good You're getting off Twitter because I'm starting to feel like social media is starting to die. I feel like, like, for example, Nikki, you have two million followers on Instagram right now, a huge compece obviously huge.
Brian predicted it back in May May.
I did this. If you did the same exact things, like the same exact series of events occurred in twenty fourteen, you would have ten m right now, real, without a doubt, Yes, without a doubt. Is that ooh, something's going on where it's just like people aren't following anymore. I think it's probably cause of the algorithm, where you just get served things that you want, like there'll be.
You don't really need to follow anymore.
You don't need to follow anymore.
Yeah, although I do because I make it. You know that thing you can check where sometimes you're like, why am I getting this video? And you press on the little three dots and it goes for thirty days only give me things I'm following. I mean, he doesn't say that, but it's some version of that. Yeah, I click on that, and I'm in that right now where I'm not getting
served any suggestions. I got to go to a explore plage page if I want it, and that makes me go, Okay, I need to unfollow the things I'm following that I don't like, and I need to follow stuff I do want. So it should be about curating it to what you like. But you're right, like, if you're just going off of what they give you, they already know you, they know what you want.
You don't need to follow anyone anymore.
Here's what happened. This is this is a tragedy beyond comprehension. When social media began, it's beyond comprehension.
Well, try to make us comprehending if it's beyond That's.
What I tried. When social media began, you would friend people and they would friend you back. It was a mutual agreement.
It was friendster, right, it was well, we.
Have that in Facebook. It was Hey, I'm in your social circle, let's be friends. There wasn't followers, and then Twitter came along created followers, but still there was a lot of follow follow back. It all came to an end when social media became less about being social and more about being a creator and being followed. And then once you were a creator and being followed, then it was all about what can I make? And it took away the social aspect. And now what's happening that we
have because we have AI? Mark Zuckerberg just went and had this big conference or whatever he was doing where he announced that Instagram and Facebook is going to start generating more and more AI creators that create content that specifically catered towards people, so that people aren't following people anymore, they're just following AI.
Why would you tell us that you're going to do that? Who wants that? Who is looking at.
Because he doesn't know what? So he has no social good?
But what but he knows what people want? They do their focus groups. They know what people want more than anything. That's why they're so popular. So why would they think people? Do people want AI content?
You? I think people will want it? What are you gonna say Sean.
Yeah, they're begging for people to want it, but I don't think they want it. What is happening right now? Or there's these like four companies who are going on a tour of every company in Silicon Valley telling them about how this is the next big thing, and like at this point, Mark Zuckerberg and like, uh, they're all kind of so detached from reality that they're just believe the salesman that is selling it. And I do think I'm I'm hoping this all blows up in their face.
I really think everyone needs to take a gigantic L.
I don't mind AI when it's like makes Trump, like making out with Putin or something, you know, like kind of like you know, like, I don't mind clear AI things that that's intriguing to me. I also, oh my god, I loved the SNL sketch this week about the AI podcast Yeah, which was so on point and so good. If you've heard any of these AI podcasts, which I did, hear mine Spotify this year Spotify Rapped did a uh customized podcast for you based on your listening habits. That
was a girl and guy talking about man Nikki. What a year It's been for you. Well, it seems like in May you really started listening to a lot of pop punk girl like Pilates Princess Beats, and then they go and they have like.
The hmm, I don't know about that. Wow, Well this song really resonated.
It was and Chris and I listened to it and we were like, whoa this is It's uncanny, you know, like it sounds like two people having a conversation, but there's something a little off about it, suspicio.
It always feels like I don't know if you've ever watched like a foreign language thing with the English like dub over dubbed.
Yes, yeah, that's what it sounds like.
It always feels that way, where like they're taking away the emotion from the seed. So you think every Japanese actor is just like super serious at every moment.
Yeah, oh my god, I just found out that they're not.
But they've really parody that paradised a parody that perfectly. I thought on SML and I was like, I wonder if people haven't heard these like fake podcasts, if they would think this is funny. But I thought that was it was timide And and Bowen doing the podcast no, but I am.
I just like it, and I thought it was so good.
The best catch of the night.
I think, oh, really, that's funny because I was the.
Last twenty minutes. So if there's a better one at the end that there.
Was a Bangers was a good episode.
I loved it.
I thought Timothy really delivered. I'm like, I'm like you, Brian, I will die.
He's so amazing. He's such a great guy and he's so charming.
I loved his musical performances. I thought cool, Yeah, his second one, especially where it was just like him talking about three men walking down the street, stepping over the cracks in the side walk, and then they walk through a dust bowl and then they see a girl with an umbrella. Like he's like, he was like, it's it's you know, he was acting, he's but he was Also I won an album from him.
I was.
I was totally sold on it. He did a really good job. I loved the podcast, the one where they were doing men are are scared to go to the doctor now and they're getting all their medical information from podcasts. So now it's like they're they trick men into like thinking they're on a podcast just to go.
See a doctor.
It's so funny.
It's called med Cast. I really recommend you watch it.
Know that was the best one. But there's another one about podcasts that I'm not thinking of.
No, it was Bowen and Timothy.
And they were AI, Oh, that's not the one I was thinking of. I was thinking of med Cast Cast was hilarious. That was my favorite, so good. It was the whole SNL evening was kind of like Golden Globes codd Like, there was that one joke about Amelia Perez and then there was Adam Sandler introduced Timothy.
So that was so exciting when I babe, Babe because Chris was like on his computer and I'm like, because it was like I just saw Adam standing there, I'm like, I know what's gonna happen.
He's introducing Timothy Timothy, I think so.
I think I had heard a rumor that Timothy was like at his daughter's bar mid so maybe that was another celebrity. But I think they're I think they were already butts, I think they already were aware of each other. There's no way that Timothy wasn't already an Adam Sandler fan.
And I can't he loves comedy. Why was Sandler there at all?
He's probably in town And someone at SML was like, who you know? I don't know.
Maybe Timothy asked, I have no I guess I could ask a meal and.
Then he said all he did that night was introduced.
Yeah.
I think he just hangs out of SNL when he's probably in town and goes to the taping, especially if he knows the host.
And then I think they were probably like everyone was like, Nikki Glazer made this happen.
I don't think. I think it would have happened regardless of my thing, but it was still very cool.
Yeah, yeah, it was super cool.
Like that always happens when it's the dual performer. They always have like a cameo to introduce them, like Juliet Fox introduced Charlie X.
Okay, I didn't know that because the host isn't there to introduce the musical guest, so they need a cameo host. I see. Yeah, it's also cool. D Lynn Manuel as a cameo.
And he had just to stand and be frozen for like four minutes and then they kept calling it out. That was so funny. I'm obsessed with SNL right now, Like, I love this season. I love watching it. Andrew does dysmutes. I always feel like I'm saying his name wrong.
I was.
I loved his weekend update where he has a he's doing a stand up act. He's like, I've incorporated a puppet into it that plays my dad, and the dad is like doing dad jokes, and then the dad it gets really somber, and the dad just starts telling Andrew how proud he is of him and like saying all the things that like a male comedian would want to
hear from their father. And then he like turns it on Colin Jos and has started he's being proud of Colin, and it's just it's it's so layered and vulnerable and strange, and it.
Was just it. I loved it so much. I'm trying to think of there was something.
There were like a couple of things this weekend that I was like, whoa, there was a lot of vulnerability behind that that was like almost masquerading as like comedy, but it.
Was almost too.
It was like even like the Oedipal Arrangements commercial was like wild.
Wow, sexually charged.
It was so wild to the point where like we watch Esenella Nolan on like Sunday morning, and I was like.
Y yeah, yeah luckily.
Like yeah, my wife was jerking them off like.
They got it.
They were distracted, living out the sketch. Okay, we got to go to break a wool talk more after this. So would you guys do any this weekend show me?
Okay, so look at this video of I mean, look at this video. Can you see it in my.
Yeah, it's an Ai woman I'm guessing and sitting with a selfie.
She's not real.
She's not real, But I mean doesn't she look real?
Yeah? I mean we've all seen this.
Okay, But like the thing about it is that in all the comments everything.
The hot girl just kind of posing it taking a selfie, you guys.
Yeah, but in all the comments, everyone is like acting like she is real. Like there's tons and and I go and investigate the accounts of the people who are commenting on this, being like you're so beautiful and there they seem like real people. They're mostly over forty or older.
And they have pictures of like off road vehicles in a ditch.
They have pictures of them well, like.
They're just all they have, like you go to their main page and it's just lots of CAMO.
I'm gonna be honest with you. Most of them are pictures of them with their wife and kid. What and they're going, what's up, big, You're so beautiful to these AI girls? Way, yes, yes, I did a full fledged journalistic investigation of the commenters on the AI influencers.
Do they think comments aren't like publics?
I don't even understand why you would do that if you had a wife and that you're publicly open with on your I.
Don't get it.
I don't get it either, and not know that the.
Girl is AI is it's not saying the thing I.
Don't think they know. And also two hundred and thirty seven thousand followers for this AI bot.
I just don't think the world is smart enough for social media, Like I just don't like my little brother follows every hot celebrity and likes their things as if they're going to like suck his dick because he threw at like Cyddy Sweeney or Brianna chicken Fry.
It's embarrassing when you see like your male friends liking posts of hot girls that they don't.
Yeah, it's really embarrassing.
You see, like I've never seen your guys' names underneath stuff that's embarrassing.
I mean, if.
You've gotta support Rihanna, you gotta throw Rihanna alike like I'm liking is one thing. But I do picture you double tapping it with one hand in your dixon the other like I do picture her mouth is slightly agape, and I know what you look like when you're double tapping it as you're either shitting or or touching yourself.
But it is, uh, it's mindless.
But I feel like most of that box uh followers are probably bots.
It's like bot body everybody says. And that's why I because that's what Ali was saying. She's like, but it's just other bots following these accounts. And then I dug in, I want to like DM these people because I really you can't tell anymore because they might be AI just answering back to what you're saying. But right, I don't think they're bots. I don't think they're but I think they are actual people who just think or don't care.
I think people are very lonely too, Like I was thinking if I was a lonely person, that didn't have much going on, and there was a way to simulate someone being my boyfriend and texting me, I'd fucking do it, you guys.
I would do it.
And if I heard that people were like convinced that it's their boyfriend, I wouldn't go what idiots. I'd be like, I want to be convinced that's my boyfriend. I want to feel the feelings Like if I can manufacture that feeling, I drink you feel happy. I smoke weed to feel happy, I'll fucking do Yeah. With the girl, the brad.
Pitt, Yeah, the brad pit Ai sure.
I mean she said the worst photoshops too.
I think this woman has a she macular degeneration. She should get her eyes fixed if she thought that those were real. That just makes me concern that people that don't have good eyesight are more susceptible.
Send him like thirty thousand dollars like wild.
Well, that's the other thing is it's not just that they're following them and that they're convinced that they're they're real. Yeah, I forgot what I was gonna say, but.
Well, I know here's what I'll say is that I know there are men and women out there who are talking to someone that they think is me and they're having a personal, private conversation that they think I sought them out because they seemed they were in a fan group that I thought, you're a real good fan, and they are probably sending money to a person they think
is me because I my manager has all my money. Yes, I have lots of money, but I just don't have access to it right now because my manager's like he his house burned down and the phone that he sends me money on was in the like some lie, because I know someone that is a normal, intelligent person who thinks they're in a relationship online with a celebrity that is not a celebrity that would ever seek his such a huge celebrity, they would never seek out a relationship
with someone they found in a Facebook fan group. But this is like, this happens, and it's it's definitely, you know gear I think these people also do know it's not real, but they just let themselves kind of let go and believe it because what else they got, you know. It's kind of one of those things. But I think that's why I had to crack down on not doing
meet and greets. Anymore, just the idea of someone coming up to me and they have had tons of sex with me in cyber sex world with whoever's playing me. Like there's someone that's sending footpicks to someone and jerking them off virtually as me, without question, I would put
all of my money on it. There's that that's happening, because if you go to Matt Rife's Instagram, there are people in his comments constantly going like, my friend thinks she's talking to you, my friend think my best friend is in love with you and is coming to see you, like you're sending her nudes, and like there's there's so.
Many Matt Rife ones.
I mean, it's these people.
But there's no amount of posting, hey, I will never reach out to you.
That's not me.
There's no amount of posting that, even bring it in your bio that will make people convince.
That it's not you.
I want to hear they want to believe that. If you want to believe it, you'll believe it.
I can't be meeting people that think that they've had a relationship with me. It's two it's two strange, too crazy.
Yeah, And I remember what I was gonna say the thing if you believe that the person's real and you're interacting with them. These guys that are interacting with these AI influencer girls, they don't realize that the person that is creating this AI girl is probably some weird guy. So you're jerking off to like the creation of some weird guy who's making these oration of some weird guy.
No, I mean, but you're one hundred percent right, Brian. And I think that's why I'm not susceptible to it is because when I got AOL in nineteen ninety five, me and my friends would constantly pretend to be lesbians and other boys pretending to be lesbians.
That's all it was.
It was so exciting age sex location, talking about penises asl pretend. Oh my god, it was. It was amazing. Man sl Sean, you though, you you won't eat white sauces because it reminds you of semen like so you're so not only will you not takes of your male friends or converse with a bot that might be made by a man, you are so.
Terrified of any you won't You.
Do not like white sauces. You don't like an alfredo, you won't do a cheese dip. You won't like a white cheese dip.
Milk red I don't like milk do we won't drink a glass of milk.
I won't drink a glass of milk.
Tahi.
You've never had a falaffel in Tahini?
No?
Not even?
What about toothpaste?
Yeah, what do you do with that? You gotta go Crest blue.
You have to stripe through it. Real, dude, that's so funny. Oh my god.
And I'm guessing you don't like use lotions. I don't really even need lotions.
I feel like at this and I need them, then I'm gonna start doing them. I thing.
It's so funny.
Men start doing like I think I need an under ie cream around forty is when, and women start around seventeen months.
It's crazy we start so young.
Like Chris for the first time was like, I think, like my under eyes might need Like what would I do? And I'm like, there's literally six million products that could address that.
I love a good under eye cream. I love when it tingles. What's that?
I don't know?
I mean I know what. I used to have this under eye cream that you put on the bags of your eyes and it tingled, and I don't think think. I don't think it's probably.
Good for you putting it in your eye or just under because.
Under your eye er to make your bags go away, and it didn't take my bag exactly.
It doesn't know makes makes of surgery. Can we get on board with that?
Girls?
Nothing and maybe lymphatic drainage. But no one wants to rub your face for thirty minutes in the morning. I've saved a million videos teaching me how to do it. You rub behind your ears first to least the drains to a sweeping guash emotion. It does work if you want to deepuff your face, but it takes way too long. There's no cream that will deep uff your eyes. They just is the way they ish.
Last night, I like had a.
I like almost started. I was like, had a you know, I was just in moody. I guess I don't know. I had just eaten a whole bag of skinny pop by myself, and like that's not a huge deal, but it's not great, Like, you know, I just half a bag is usually what I like to do per sitting. It's like I think two and a half three servings, you know, and then I do polish off the bag the next sitting, but one sitting for one bag, it's
not great. I didn't feel good. I already it was not I just felt disgusting, and I was like I just was like crumpled it up and like told Chris like, well, I'm just gonna be fat tomorrow, and like just was like trying kind of to taunt him to say that I'm not, you know, but he didn't like take the bait, and and then I like kind of and we were also watching Celebrity Jeopardy, and I think that's why I ate the whole bag, because I was imagining being on
Celebrity Jeopardy because I do want to do it at some point. And I was playing along and Chris was getting them all so much faster than me, and I was also like I got to say, what is who is?
When?
You know, like I have to do the right way because I need to get start practicing right. So he's beating He's not even doing those things, but he's also beating me to it anyway, and so I'm like, I'm so dumb.
And then a question came up that was, you know, essentially, the question was.
What is the most populous city in Brazil And what would you guys have said, Priscilia. Yeah, that's a great guest, Sean, it's not right, Brian.
What would you guess?
I don't know what that city, has never even heard of it in my life. It's San Paulo salpa Is it San Paulo sal Polo? Okay, I would accountable. Well, that's that's amazing. I'm I'm I was saying I've never even heard of that to insult me, not you, by the way, I knew you knew what you were talking about. I said Buenos Aires because I'm an idiot, and I just figured that's in Brazil.
I just picked a you know, a city in South America.
Yeah, And man, I just was like, what if I said that on TV? And Chris is like okay, and I go like, that is so dumb, Like that's Argentina, right, And he's like yeah, I'm like, oh my god, Like I can't be on the show, Like what if I say something so dumb you know where You're just like and that's not like And then all I wanted him to say, do you ever like, are you ever trying to get an answer out of your significant other that's gonna make you feel better, but they just like won't
give it to you. All I really wanted him to say was like, that's not that dumb nikki, Like it's a South American city, like it's you know, you know, it's if you haven't been there or whatever, it's fine. But instead he was just like, that question is not gonna come up. And he's like and he's like, people won't remember Seth Green lost. He was just out, as long as you're having fun, it's gonna be great. I'm like, this is not what I want to hear. So I like,
I'm in bed just like I'm just so stupid. I can't go on that show and I'm not gonna embarrass myself in front of everyone. And he's like, you haven't even been asked, and I'm like pouting in bed. Do you ever have those moments where you just become overly I guess you guys aren't women, so you probably don't. But you're gonna start getting more estrogen, so you might start like where you get emotional about a thing that's not even happening, and like, I just I have this.
And then I was actually talking to Taylor at lunch the other day about fears and her fear because she's a I forget what nyagram she is, but she has a fear of being stupid, of someone like seeing that she's not as intelligent as she is. And Chris's fear is being incompetent and not being able to help, like breaking his legs or something, and like not being able to be the person that can get you something and help.
And I was talking to Taylor about my fear and I'm like, my fear is like not being like not reaching my potential is my fear because I'm a three. But I don't really fear being stupid. So I even said this at lunch on Friday. I was like, Ah, I don't care if people know I'm not intelligent, So then why did I freak out about this Buenos Aires thing? I don't even know, So maybe my fear is being unintelligent.
Well, if you're if you're basing it off of the enneagram, then it's because you're the being on Celebrity Jeopardy in and of itself as a performance, and if you get an answer wrong, you're performing poorly, and.
The yeah, you're not reaching your potential of winning Celebrity Jeopardy.
Yeah, and I do. Yeah, yes, okay, that's a good point.
But I also I do feel like some there are certain things where if you don't know them, people just go what yeah, and then they question everything about you, like you didn't know that. Like I have that kind of idea in my head where it's like.
You didn't know eggs came from tens. You feel I came from.
Chicken kind of Yeah, yeah, I think, yeah, I mean it is a type of chicken, so it's still technically true.
Yeah. I think in my way, I'm like, I think I'm technically right that I feel right now.
Yeah, I I feel I feel like you know, like I just but but here's what Chris said to me. He was like the oh, this was the the thing that I was like, that's not what I want to hear you. He goes listen going on Celebrity Jeopardy, it's incredibly brave. Most celebrities don't do it because they don't
want to look stupid. They're so obsessed with their image and and and accidentally saying saying buenos aires instead of sal paul that Paulo, sal Paulo, Yeah, thank you that they that they fear looking dumb, Like I know that one of the smartest people I think that exists wouldn't be a lifeline for me when I did Who wants to be a millionaire celebrity wouldn't even a lifeline that I call right, because he said that he prides himself so much on that that it would be too embarrassing.
Like he's been asked to do.
Every single like smart person celebrity thing and he will do none of them because it is.
Too too terrifying.
I'll tell you guys who later, But it's literally one of the smartest people that's probably ever existed in our industry, and he won't do anything. It's the same way that Anya won't sing karaoke, even though she's the best singer in the room. She doesn't want to do the thing on a stage that could potentially in front of novices make her look just like everyone else.
I maybe that's why I don't want on.
Top of that, like where Honestly, whenever I've been in a karaoke and somebody really fucking goes for it and like crushes it, like and they clearly are a professional singer. Yeah, everyone I'm with is kind of like, oh, so they just come here to feel better about themselves, Like.
Yeah, you do ride that line of like being a show off because you are a professional.
But I'm sorry, if you're.
A professional, get up there and be professor. I want to see a good performance. We've heard rap all night. Like, I will never begrudge someone that, but I think that people do fear like having if you're getting up there for every other song.
Yeah, but if you're going against your will, like oh, I guess and then you nail it. Come on, honey, you gotta show off your skills.
It's I'm always like, God, if I had Anya's voice, I would be doing karaoke every fucking night, just for myself, you know, like just to hear what I'm capable of. It's it's wild to me that Noah sits there and like knows how to play guitar really really well and just like doesn't like it's it's crazy to me when people have like a talent that they work so hard to get and then they just let it.
They don't do you do it for you.
That's because you're a three. You don't get it, you just do it for you. It's like it's like meditative and calming, and it's you get that self satisfaction.
Yeah, exactly, but even for yourself.
But I guess I guess you're right. Like I was practicing guitar yesterday and I was just really struggling with it because I'm like, I can't go live because I have it's it's too my. If someone will screen record it, it'll end up on something. It's too embarrassing. So I can't go live anymore. So there's my old my old way practicing just like Bestie's watching is just done.
And then I was like, this sucks. I don't even one way doing this for the dogs. Don't give a shit.
And then I heard Chris like kind of like he was cleaning the apartment and I was just in my room with the door shut, and I was like, I'm just gonna perform for Chris.
He doesn't even know it, but he's just gonna have to. I want. My goal is to have him go like, Wow, she's getting better.
And I like imagined him in the next room being like, wait, Nikki's actually really improving at this. Yeah, Like that's the only way I got through the practice session. If he wouldn't have been there, I would have just put on my guitar and taken a nap. Are you the same way, Sean? Do you you have your three? You have to like do some in front of people.
Always, Like, honestly, being alone is just not working.
You're never alone though, right.
You wake up your son sometimes just to have an audience.
Yeah, a little bit like reaction I need, Yeah, like I need a reaction. Like my therapist told me that I equate positive validation with and negative validation the same exact way. And I have had to overcome the negative validation part because I would be like I would love to like shit on people, because I was getting the same feeling as I was.
Wait, good, Wait, so you gossiping or like being mean or like talking shit about people gives you the same feeling as because it's like because it's connective. It's like it makes people go yeah and interested in what you're gonna say next. You have some great gossip, Like it's currency for connection.
Yeah, and like she she correctly identified the fact that I will needle my mom to get her to freak out, and that is just as good as a law.
Oh wow, that's interesting. I do relate to that of like if just.
Needed I don't know, not with my family as much, but definitely and not I don't know. I'm that's why I sent you the I sent you both, I think, uh separately. The Sam Harris podcast that was the most recent one, Yeah, I got.
I think it's a second most I'm imagining you sent it to Sean and I both for different reasons.
You know.
I won't let me think about that for a second, because it was really just about It was pretty much a pitch for his meditation app, which he does he makes money off of, but he's really just doing it for.
The betterment of the world. I do believe that.
And so it was a podcast about why it's important to meditate, especially in this time kind of given what's going on and the fires and politics and everything. And then it uh it then he played a kind of meditation kind of just talk that I thought was like really interesting and just reminded me of why I need to start medicating again. And I thought, oh, you know what like these Yeah, I think Brian, I pitched it to you because I feel like it's the one modality I haven't heard you.
Try yet, like meditating.
Yeah, Like in terms of like all of your kind of psychosomatic stuff like I did. I've never I'm sure you have, but I hadn't heard you try a meditation practice.
I've tried it, but not with like the exclusive, uh goal of solving my problems. I used to do it just like because I thought it was supposed to be good for you.
Yeah, well I think it solve your problem.
Isn't there another Harris?
Dan Harris, Dan Harris, he does, he's like the fifteen percent happier.
Yeah, I fifteen percent happier back I don't know if it's ten years ago. And I used his app and I started doing that back in the day. And then Sam Harris came along and confused the hell out of me, and then I got so upset that I stopped meditating all together.
Yeah, this is why you need to meditate. It like you have to separate the Harrises.
And I think I said it to Sean because I thought that Sean just is I think it would wake up something.
And Sean said that he didn't. I don't even know that Sean has.
Even gotten like I think for my my version of what Sean, you probably have never even attempted meditation.
If I would guess and it's something that you're like, I want to, but I wouldn't, and then I thought it might sell it on you.
I want to so bad and every time I've tried, I've just talked shit about it in my head. And then listening to Sam Harris break that down and be like he basically was telling me that I'm not special and we all do this when we're meditating, yes, And that was like a really I needed to hear that, because every time I've ever talked to somebody about meditation, they're always just like, you just got to like quiet the voice in your head, and I'm like, no, I like it better when.
The guy shit, We all yeah, and that your voice is that's meditating is like being like, this is dumb what am I doing? And then you go, oh wait, I'm meditating and then you go to the breath for literally two seconds, and then you go, oh, this is dumb again, and then it's just like that I always remember from my TM class and I won't share anything else because it's super secret. But the part that really makes your brain go to like this deeper level is
the moment you go, I'm meditating. Let me go back to the breath and that can literally last two seconds. But they used to do draw an example of like a diver, you know, like when you would squeeze those two leaders. Remember we made those in like fourth grade. You squeeze a two liter bottle of soda and there's like little diver that goes down.
Can you remember that.
I can imagine when you squeeze it, the pressure would make it go down.
I never one, but you know what I'm saying, Yeah, you painted a great picture.
When you squeeze it, the diver goes down automatically. And that's what they gave an example of, is like that's your mind going down, like when you when you go, oh, I'm meditating back to the breath, it goes down and then you get into the subconscious and it just gets the grime out of your brain. And I'm anyway, I'm like back on the track. I meditated today, and I would say out of the twenty minutes, I sat there in silence trying to say my mantra because I'm doing
TM right now instead of breath meditation. But but it's the same thing, like you're just focusing on something that's repetitive. I probably was focused on the mantra for like thirty seconds of the twenty minutes. But that is still meditating. That is what meditating is. Don't get it in your head that meditating is like sitting there with no thoughts. It is constant thoughts. And I was able to just like think about some stuff for the day and like kind of go over my life and like you just
when do you ever sit alone with your thoughts? And and aren't looking at us? Like when do you just sit what alone with your thoughts and nothing else? Literally at the dentist.
The reason why I don't, I think I don't meditate it because I do my DNRS rounds, which is like you are. You are sitting in a dark room and you do wind up thinking about things and that's like you're supposed to go to a different, like more positive place. But so that's why I haven't really engaged in it. But I mean it's something that I could try. One thing I really liked about what you sent me was this concept of the voice in your head that's with you and that talks to you all day.
That's following you around like an incessant toddler.
Like like a maine. It's like this main act. Yeah, me, like a maniac is following you into every room of your house and telling you how shitty you are twenty four to seven. What would you do if that was happening?
That's that was such a great way of describing your inner monologue. Yeah, like the shit talking that goes on, Like you would just be like shut the fack, like you want to get away from it, but like we don't. We don't detach that voice from ourselves. That's essentially what meditating is is like finding a way to take the thoughts and not make them who you are. Yeah, Like they're just these things that are thrust on you, like the rain falling. Like the rain isn't you because it
hits your head. The rain is just something coming from another place.
WHOA.
If you are able to look at your thoughts like rain droplets and just be like ah, like kind of block them or just see them and go, ha, that's not me.
I'm not the rain. It's just a thing that's all me, then you were.
Able to navigate all of like all of the bullshit and focus on things that matter more.
That's the problem, because when it rains on my head, I do think I'm the rain.
Yeah, okay, why do I do that?
There?
We gotta go to break. We'll be back up with this.
Did you guys watch anything cool or do anything fun this weekend?
We went to the We went to see The Wizard of Oz in theaters.
Oh yeah, I saw you post about this.
It was so cool. It was so great. It was packed. It was at the Egyptian Theater in Hollywood.
Oh, that's it's huge, right, The egypt Theater is a huge one.
Yeah, it's it's gigantic. It's like very old. And it was like in celebration because it was David Lynch's favorite movie and we took no one to see it and it was like it was amazing, and it honestly unlocked so much in my head in terms of storytelling. It really The Wizard of Oz is a perfect movie. There's no fat there's no tension. It is just a sprint
the entire time. Every scene is iconic to the point where like you know exactly what's gonna happen, but they've never they're like the big build up to, Like the battle between Drothy and the Wicked Witch is twenty five seconds long. There's no like marveling it up of like eight minutes of like picking sides. It just happens and you're okay with it, and it moves on to the next thing. It's just always sprinting, and it's just there's no fat. It's incredible.
I think I really have an aversion to it for some reason, because I think I saw at a young age and I was scared of those monkeys, and I just was scared of any kind of scariness in a movie, or any kind of like darkness in a movie. I Pinocchio, I was screaming, crying when the whale showed up.
I don't even know.
I will not very visit Pinocchio too for that Pinocchio. Pinocchio for the same reason. But I guess I gotta the Wizard of Oz again. It's if if it's like a lesson in movie making and storytelling. I'm trying to you know, it's you're not wasting your time watching things. If you are someone that wants to create things, consuming the things you want to create is actually work. And I remember when I was watching some video about writing a song, when I was like, God, I just want to write one song.
This guy was like, you don't need to feel like a novice.
If you've listened to music your whole life, you've been like preparing for this moment. You don't need to be like I don't know what I'm doing, so like when I'm watching things, man, So it's so inspiring to consume TV shows that are good. That's why I'm like trying to watch good stuff and not just like crap, because man, I love Gordon Ramsey. I love Hell's Kitchen, I fucking or kitchen Nightmares. I love watching a business struggling. A
guy comes in, yells at some people. There's a brother and a son, and the families is strange, and then they hug and cry over a grill. It's like, I fuck love it. But I realized that we went back and I was like, Chris, let's go back and watch last season. I don't think we've finished it. And I pick a one that we haven't seen and we're watching it and Chris is like, we saw this, and I'm like we did, and I'm like, I'm it's all completely new to me and I go, oh my.
God, it does. It's trash. It goes in one ear and out the other.
I've seen this already, kind of recently, and I can't keep watching these things that aren't giving me sustenance. It's like eating a blow pop for lunch, Like that's not going to fill me up. It's delicious and I get to chew on it a little bit and I get this little stick and I get to non but essentially it's not giving me anything good. So I have to force myself to watch things that are maybe a little bit more tedious, not as exciting. But I I I'm now Chris and I are like, because we want to
write a movie and make a movie. We're like doing every night we watch a movie, and that's like our new thing, which sounds like.
It's it's it's honestly work. I have to be honest because this is the life.
For agrees with you, because you could write off all those movies he purchases that you're if you're renting it.
Yeah, you're right.
I always think about this because like, oh, when it was in my early thirties, I was like, what if I just like go back to school and go to like film school. And then I listened to this interview or read this interview with Paul Thomas Anderson, who's like one of my favorite directors, and he said he went to film school for two weeks and he realized that
they weren't. They were focusing so much on stuff that he did not care about that he was like, I've seen most of this and I could just watch every movie and just learn what to do from them. And that's what he did, and he's become like the greatest director of his entire generation.
And with YouTube, now you don't you really don't need to go to school for almost any reason. No anything you want from the experts.
Yeah, the master class. Martin Scorsese teaches a master class and it tells you everything you need to know about directing, and then Ron Howard teaches one and to teach you everything.
You need to know about the master classes. Are they fun?
They're fun. They're fun. It's great. Get a subscription, it's it's great.
Yeah.
I want to add Okay, I want to do those, but this weekend, but I'm just going back and watching things that I've already seen. I watch Friends with Money, which is on Netflix. I think it's Jennifer Aniston and Francis McDormand and Joan Cusack and they're all friends and they're all rich. And then Jennifer Aniston is the poor one, and it's just a good movie with good dialogue, good relationships. I just I think I love seeing Jennifer Aniston as like a poor person. I love the good girl. I
think that's fun. I think that's what I want to do for a movie. I want to play like someone not poor, but like someone who's just like works so the cash register, like I think like imagining, because for a while I was like, I gotta play me, so it's gotta be someone that's like doing a like moving and shaking and like doing a job that is like requires a lot of energy and skill and talent and all this. And it's like, but I could have just not done those things and I'd still be the same person.
What if I was the person that didn't discover stand up comedy, I wouldn't become an actress. I wasn't good enough, I wouldn't have found some other path. I would have just gone the corporate route. Like what happens if my best person, who I am, ends up in those places? And I think that's kind of what I see Jennifer Aniston do. It's like she is herself, but she's just it's like as if she was living a different life, and that to me is really interesting.
It's so much more interesting. I mean, I feel like everything about Hollywood, Like obviously, when you're sitting down to write, you're like, what do I know about you? Always kind of go to that, But like when you watch like those romantic comedies, very sparticularly from like the nineties and early two thousands, everyone's job is like so it's like I'm an editor of a magazine, Like I'm a high powered PR person, Like I'm a corporate lawyer. Like it's
so weird. Like it's just like they went through a list of jobs and they're like, oh, I could have done that, Like that's what it to school for.
And generally you don't get into the minutia of the job anyways, Like you don't have to know like how to be a corporate lawyer in order to write it into a script, because they're not going to have like a corporate loss scenes.
Probably because of what women want.
When Helen Hunt, who I thought I kind of looked like and was like, maybe that's the woman I'm going to turn into. I wanted to be at an ad agency, and I wanted to wear nude power suits with like a pencil skirt and give presentations on boards and be carrying around a briefcase and have a walk up apartment like I you know, you just like, but you're right, So what is the deal now, Sean? So you don't need to pick a job that you know, you can just pick like anything.
You can pick anything. I feel like there's a whole new way of doing things, especially because everything is filled in the bulgaria that you could just kind of like, but I do think like, you know, like the the director Sean Baker with like he's exclusively focuses on like sex work and stuff like that has really opened up every job is just now you could do anything. Okay.
You can also.
Longer have to be a bakery owner, right.
A great way to do it is this is something you're already really good at. Is if there's a job that you're just like interested in portraying in a script, just go on Reddit and find those people on Reddit and just dig into the world for like a week, and then you'll have enough information to be able to write that really idea.
Yeah, yeah, that's.
Okay, that's that's I'll maybe do that. I also watched. Final thought I watched. I can't recommend enough Sidewalks of New York. It's amazing, that is. I think it's on Paramount Plus for a couple more days. You should really watch it.
What did we watched? Oh, last night was the football game?
Yeah, we've were amiss to not mention that the AFC and NFC championships happened and we are now facing in two weeks the probably two most hated teams in all of NFL facing off against each other in the Super Bowl.
How do you guys feel about those wins yesterday and what was your experience watching those games?
I was rooting so hard for the Bills, like I've.
Never rooted for anything more like.
When they when they lost, I genuinely I felt it as if I was like a lifelong Builts fan.
Yeah, yeah, which is not hard to imagine. It's like being a Mets fan.
Yeah, it's well, uh yeah, that was a good game, though, I mean it felt like things could have gone into a different direction till you know, the last couple of minutes.
Yeah, it was a good game. And then the refs. I feel like I just felt like the refs were wanted the Chiefs to win, even though I know that there's not some conspiracy theory there were, like the NFL wants wouldn't.
The NFL want the Chiefs to go to the super Bowl?
Yeah?
What if?
There it's there's there's nothing conspiratorial about this. You look at a business, it's a business, and one of the businesses is set to you know, it is set to set a record and make history.
And also Taylor Swift might be there.
Yeah.
You want they are actually a great team. Obviously that too, But like it's you can feel the pull of the universe that is the NFL wanting the Chiefs to go all the way? Why wouldn't you It's like they're on every fucking commercial.
You don't see any Eagles players on commercial.
You don't see any but you don't see one.
Okay, fine, possibly, but you don't see bills. I don't see Josh Allen on the single commercial.
Not unless you're in a local Buffalo area.
That's what I'm saying.
National commercials, I don't see any. Uh what challengers is that? The Commanders? I don't see them?
Do you? I'm really asking.
No, I think you will?
Daniel start in, Jayden, Dan, why wouldn't you want the star the biggest stars in the country and the world who are on every other commercial, to then go the next step and play.
And there were a couple of plays, like a couple of key plays that the refs get to decide, like where the ball is placed at the end of the play. And there was like, I would say, two or three plays wherever it felt like every single time the refs just placed the Bill's ball just short of the first down line, when it was like I think that was a first down and it's like, no, it's just short. And two of those times it resulted in a turnover.
I'm sorry, but aren't these things exact? Aren't these things you would think objective?
There were a couple of times even the announcers they're like, oh, yeah, the phantom flag that was picked up.
The flag and then it was gone.
The bill were talking about it and they were like, oh, actually, I don't think it was.
Throw Oh the announcers got were like, oh, let's talk. It was like when my my parents don't talk about our dog that we gave away. It's like like, let's just not mention this thing anymore. It's like we we alls knew that we had a flag, right, we all saw it, and then there's no mention.
Yeah, it was really.
There was the interception at the end that they didn't review that the ball clearly to me hit the ground and so it would have been like a non catch. They called it a catch.
So I'm sorry, why don't they go back and watch that.
They kind of did and then they said, oh, it's confirmed.
And no, but there was one where they did review the footage and I guess I was trying to understand it. So they the refs called the play and then there wasn't enough evidence to overturn the call. But had the one ref who had been on the other side of the line seen it, he would have said it was uh for the like it was like, because one ref called it, they couldn't overturn it. But if the other ref would have just called it, they would have not been able to overturn that y on the other way.
So that, yeah, that that exact thing happened, and that happens in games all the time. But it just felt like, man, it was happen.
Why isn't there a camera that can see centered right over the line and see why aren't there cameras in every.
Every single yard. I mean, I guess one day there will be, but for now, how could there not be?
Now about the little one that's always flying through the air, Why isn't that just like you always tracing the ball?
Why isn't it connected to get the shots of Taylor Swift in the box?
But literally, why don't they have a motion thing on a camera that one of the cameras that goes on the field and just goes, what are your all around on those little wires? Why isn't that motion censored to the ball and so it's always hovering.
Above the ball.
I don't think that's as easy as also.
Not help because sometimes I watch the replays literally six times, and I do not know where the ball is, and I cannot tell where it is. There's too many people on top of it, and you just don't know.
How do you know?
During the Super Bowl they do have almost that many cameras, so many cameras in fact, that you can do a full three sixty of any play without it seeming like there was a break. You'll see that in the Super Bowl. But they can only afford that for like the Super Bowl.
Well, I'm helping for the guy that was crying on the bench. I like that, Yeah, I like I like seeing tears, you know. I'm happy to see them go a third time and possibly get three in a row.
And it's fun.
I'm sad for my friend Sean. Thank you to the bestie who wrote me to check in on my friend Sean, whose happiness and livelihood depend on the bills progressing. He's all rights, Sean. Little did I know you were also as a dependent on this bill's win. But yeah, I think it's I'm going to the super Bowl. It's gonna be fun, you know. Obviously, I'm fucking excited that I get to go to a thing and Taylor is going to be in the stadium, and it's going to be
really fun. Like the energy is just exciting and I'm happy about it. And they all looked happy, you know.
Yeah. And I'm happy for.
Randy Mahomes, who you know, we're friends on Instagram. Uh So, I'm happy for Patrick Mahomes mom. I think she's a sweetheart, like a lot shout out.
I'm happy for Saquon I think. I mean, there's no like the fan base of the Eagles is one of the most notoriously hated fan bases in all of sports, and the Chiefs are hated because they just win all the time. So like it's like being the It's like being the Patriots in the early two thousand.
Not fair.
It's like, just because someone wins all the time, why do we got to take away things from people who were winning, Like because we.
Want we want someone else to have a shot at it.
But when they weren't winning, we loved them. It's like nothing chased.
When they first came back and they were and they were like facing off against Tom Brady and dethroning that dynasty, were all rooting for the chief.
He loved it. But nothing's changed since then. They're the same people.
What's interesting about the Super Bowl coming up is that Andy Reid is the coach of the Chiefs. Now he was the long term. He was the long term coach of the Eagles too. He brought the Eagles to the Super Bowl multiple times. And we've got the Kelsey brothers brothers connection. I'm sure Jason Kelsey's pissed off.
I just think it's so it's so retired. It's so crazy that Tom Brady did something that like no one else has ever done in the like the entire run of football, and then Pat Mahomes is like close, like right after he retired, is about to do.
Something that Tom never did.
I mean like there's like a real chance that like Pat Mahomes is going to have thrown him as like the greatest of all.
Time right after he gets crowned the greatest of all time.
Yeah.
Like and also while that happens, guess who is going to have to announce it because it's gonna be on Fox, the Super Bowls on Fox. Tom Brady's gonna be the announcer saying, Wow, I guess I'm not the best anymore.
Is this really?
Like is this what people think that, like you guys as football fans are like, this is seriously, if he wins this one, he's going to dethrone Brady.
I mean he'd have to win seven rings. That would be the and how many does you have?
No?
Four?
It'll be four, three, but he has three right now, but then before before.
Yeah, and he's still like so young, like all things.
Considered, Yeah, he has plenty of time.
It'll be. It's the equivalent was like if Michael Jordan retired and then the next year Lebron showed up right.
Yeah, there's always going to be someone that's next.
But the thing is people people say that Tom Brady, people say that Patrick Mahomes is young. But if you're called Tom Brady's career, he had success early with the two thous his first year being the starter, and then the next couple of years they won this like three times, and then there was a long like almost ten year gap where he didn't win another ring, and then he finally came back and won a couple and then again with the Bes.
What you gotta do, that's the business. You gotta be on top, and then you gotta go away. Then you got to reinvent yourself and come back, and then you got to be a legend. And then like it's this, This just shows me that, Like yeah, I was like, oh, we all just are not excited about chiefs because we're like tired of seeing them win. It's like, it's that's what makes me nervous about winning so much recently in my life, is like I'm gonna have to go away
and then people are gonna root against me. It's inevitable, there's no way to avoid it. It is the human condition that we don't like to see things on top for.
Too for too long. Yeah, that's why I gotta you gotta be laying the cut. You gotta go and stay in and see go on top for a while. I mean, like with the like with the Golden Globes for example. But as we've seen with Tina and Amy, you have several years. I think of.
Even my friend Kirsten this week was like, oh, Nikki, like I went to go visit Krison for a birthday. I just flew to Kansas City for one day and or like for five hours to visit, uh, surprise her.
For a birthday.
And we were talking to her mom about her mom was there at lunch and about her mom listens to the podcast and she's like people.
Always ask me, was Nikki funny growing up? And I just tell them no.
She was.
She was so serious.
She didn't impression of me and my arms are just crossed and I'm just like looking pissed off. She was like, this was Nikki all like as a child, just looking looking suspicious around, bored, suspicious and like glaring.
And I was collecting data, is what I was doing. But that is true.
And then she said that what was my point going to be about staying on top.
Nope, purepaced these years, you got to lay in the cut.
Kirsten said, no, God damn that mission of being on top and.
Your mom was saying, you're serious when you're young.
Yeah, I forget it now. I forgot what my whole fucking point was gonna be. But that yeah, I uh, but yeah, all I got was that she stood up to do impression on me, and I was like, no, I don't want to see this, and then she told me I wasn't funny, and I was just like, I
don't want to hear any of this. But then I was just like and then Kirsten knows that I get like really embarrassed and people do it impression on me, and she also knows that, like I don't want to hear that I wasn't funny, growing it doesn't matter what I am now, Like you don't want to hear like that. None of us saw this coming. No offense, mama flow, but it's you know, no one wants to hear that. But but I'm like used to it now because I'm realizing,
like I just wasn't I was studying people. I wasn't like acting I was the clown growing up. I was more like the observer.
The clown ever wins in the end. The class clown, whoever gets voted class clown or high school is not going to be a comedian. Really, Yes, I came.
In second place in the high school and I was so pissed at the time. And now he's just like he works at six Flags Great Adventure. I won. I'm the class.
Class That's right, I'm the same way. I didn't win class clown either. There was someone else who was class clown and said I got most changed since middle school, and someone else won class clown because he would fart in his hand and put in people's faces. And I'm like, well, class.
Clown in eighth grade, but then in high school I got most changed.
Whoa wow, who changed?
I don't even remember that superlative most changed since middle school.
It usually went to somebody who like lost a drastic amount of weight.
Oh God, I definitely that happened to me too. I had a huge growth I was in middle school. As to quote John Mulaney's joke, I looked like a little Asian boy and I would hold a trumpet and I had a mushroom cut in little round glasses. And then when I was in high school, I legitimately looked like I had a goatee in sideburns and I looked like I was in olymp biscuit or something. Wow.
Yeah, we got to see these pictures. I don't think I've ever seen you as a young boy.
Yeah, I was a young little boy.
Did you dress differently?
I there's just this picture of me in my dad's house where it was at a It was during a concert, like the Winter Concert. So I'm standing there with a white buttoned down shirt. I'm pretty tubby. I've got these a mushroom cut and round glasses, and I'm holding a trumpet case. And I do look like I just came from a different country, and I'm trying to figure out how America works.
Could you probably trumpet?
Now?
If I gave you one, would you be able to make a sound?
Trumpet is tough because you have to have like the aperture. It needs to be work. You have to your lips need to be strong in order to be able like even blow into it.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, it's like yeah exactly.
But I could probably blow into it and play like a scale.
Oh wow, all right, I'm impressed. Did you play an instrument, Sean, and then we'll go I.
Played bass, but yeah, I played like yeah, I played bass guitar and like the worst bands New Jersey's that we're seeing.
Wait how many years?
Uh? Junior and senior year?
So you could like to do it again? You you know some basslegs.
I know some bass legs that I could get back into it.
I think music level.
Like emo music. We were in a band called one One Morning After. You'll never guess how morning was spelled.
Oh my god.
All right, that's our show. Thank you guys for listening. Thanks for listening to this football podcast. Sorry, we just had to h It'll be over soon.
Thank you, Brian. Think you know what? Think you Sean. We'll be here tomorrow. We'll see you.
Then it'll be cold. Bye bye. The Nikki Glazer Podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeart Podcasts. Created and hosted by me Nicki Glazer, co hosted by Brian Frangie. Executive produced by Will Ferrell, Hans Sonny and Noah Avior. Edited it engineered by Lean and Loaf, Video production Mark Canton, and music by Anya Marina You can now watch full episodes of the Nicki Glazer Podcast on YouTube, follow at Nicki Glazer Pod and subscribe to our channel