#495 Jimmy Kimmel LIVE, A Wild News Cycle & Nikki at The Last ERAS

Then Glazer podcast.

Here's Nikki. Hello here, I am welcome to the show.

It's a Nicky Glazer podcast. I'm in Los Angeles. Joined with me here, of course, is Brian Frangie Hello, Sean O'Connor, and Andrew Collins.

Yeah, I don't remember. That's like an airline.

I had a bit for a while that whatever the song save Tonight, Fight the Break of whenever that would be playing, and like at a restaurant or you know, bar or whatever, I just go like, what is this song? And just see what people do around you when you claim to have never heard of it. Wouldn't work as well now because I'm sure gen z M like hasn't heard that song before.

Nobody eighty years ago.

That song, Like, no, there's no one that existed in the adult world that wouldn't have recognized that song.

But it's so funny.

There is something in your knowledge that hasn't gotten to you that you just coincidentally have missed every single time.

Yeah, and someone eventually will go, you've never heard of that?

And it's like, yeah, because it wasn't my fault. It's not like I'm like trying not to. I just it didn't get to me like I didn't know what a SEPEP was.

I was twenty four a CPA.

Yeah, I had no idea. It never just never got to me.

It was no reason for you to need to knowice you would have.

I would have loved for you to be there when people found out that I had not known what a CBA was.

That's the machine you put on your face when you're sleeping.

Yeah, yeah, the sepe machine.

I remember. I have A pivotal growth moment for me was when I was I interned at UCB Chelsea in like two thousand and four or five or something, and I was the interns there just get treated like shit.

You know.

They make you literally clean like bloody tampons out of the toilets, Oh my god. And in return you get into classes like oh god, unbelievable.

Revisors always have a really heavy flow.

But I remember I was sitting in the box office and I said something like scientology I've never seen like some ridiculous movie like Back to the Future, and they ridiculed me for like the rest of the summer for not having seen.

Yeah.

It's like I'm like ten years younger than everybody in here.

Yeah, that's the that's the I have a joke about it. It's like, that's what old people do to young people to make ourselves feel better about the fact that we're not young, as we just make them feel bad about things they weren't alive to experience.

Like, yeah, there's a million movies that gen ZM hasn't seen that I'm like, I want to go. You haven't seen Clueless, you haven't seen what was shank Redems.

I don't even know if that was one of them, but there was one recently where I was like, you have to see it and she was like, okay, just added to the list I get. And I'm like, no, no, this one came out three years ago. This one like, I can't recommend. But the others, I'm like, no, I haven't seen Raiders of the Lost Arc, I haven't seen Back to the Future. I haven't seen Star Wars. I

Etraspect.

You got to go full grit. You can't go half grid.

Yeah, too glossy.

No, that's like when you put on makeup as a girl.

You're like you're getting ready and you're like, I should put on mascare and then you're like, well, if I'm doing masscare, I should do an eyeliner. If I'm doing an eyeliner, I should probably do a liplighter, and then you just are full like drag queen makeup eventually, because it's either all or nothing.

But I do kind of love that current art being made, like TV and movie movies all kind of looks so shitty now, like everything is just like it's like you're in the room with them where that's what they want you to feel. And it used to be like come on, like it's like a play happening in front of your eyes.

Yeah.

I like when things look real.

Yeah, you want it to all be reality too.

If you watch anything on Netflix in the last five years, they're all like perfectly shot. They're not it looks unless it's Amelia Paris, it looks so it looks so fake. Well any every I feel like everything on Netflix has this particular aesthetic where it's meant to look perfect.

Yeah, it looks, but it's like cheap. They're just using like the best camera they could possibly do. But like if you I don't want to be like I'm the seventies movie guy, but like when you like watch that, it's like everything is like a real house and like, yeah, there's like so much care put into everything that's in the back.

I see a clip of Jamie Lee Curtis looking young, she's in a real house or share and like, I don't watch old movies, but whenever you see clip of one, it's like in a real set. It's not it's perfectly aesthetically everything's curated. I just things should look sloppy. Yes, I want sloppiness. Now looks too manufacturing, Like.

It's a great thing.

You mentioned Jamie Lee Curtis, Like, if you see like an old clip of her, her hair, looks like no offense. To Jamie Lee Curtis, it looks like shit. Ye, Like it looks like there's no care put into it. But it also gives like, oh my god, that's like a real teenager who's going to be murdered, and I care more.

Yeah, yeah, I want things to look more real Spielbergian.

Yeah, I want to want to.

Does it cost more too to make it look less like using film as opposed to digital.

Oh, it takes more time.

Film costs so much money, and then and then like on top of that, it's like gonna it disintegrates over time, so like there's no reason to do that when you can just put everything is.

So interesting that things like there's no way unless you digitally enhance them and have people spend hours like getting them back to looking good. Like there are things that are shot that will never look the way they looked when they aired.

No, and you just think, no, it's on.

TV, it's of course it will, but no, it's it's literally gotten old.

Like everything else. Does everything goes Oh yeah.

I mean people spend I mean Warner brother spends millions of dollars like every three years to make friends look.

Good still Oh yeah, you're so right, because like if.

You watch like Seinfeld on Netflix, it still kind of looks like the nineties. But like Friends, they even hands like yeah, it's like the colors pop, like they're spending so much money to make this.

And you know, this has been going on for I think over a decade or more. But like reruns of Friends, everyone toasts like this. Everyone sounds like they're on healing because they're speeding up so they can fit in more commercials. So like literally Monica sounds like this, and Chandler like it's like every it's it's all sped up by like point two.

I would say, oh.

Yeah, no point two.

You're right.

It is to fit in one more commercial. It's one more you know, two hundred and fifty thousand dollars and they can sell.

Yeah, to just make it. We're just a commodity used to sell toilet paper.

And I'll tell you I love speeding things up. I was watching Conclave over the weekend, which I love, but I would have loved to speed that up.

I get it.

I can just insert here this just in your head. Isabelle Roselna took longer to walk down this hall. Just remember that it was intended to be longer.

You're I miss that, Like things used to be quick and like move and now everyone like I don't know what happened like in the last ten years, but everyone wants like to see people like parking.

They're like, I like that.

I like this.

You you like like the like going beep beep, like the doors open like that, will it open.

Like Boardwalk Empire or something.

I want to see four people sitting at the table talking real fast.

I want Yeah, I want the speed of a veep. I want the speed of a just a Sorkin sweep.

Yeah, that's what I want.

Theory is that they need to justify people going to the movie theaters by making the movies longer, so it's like an event.

Right where you can just really tapp Like.

That's another reason why comedies have gone extinct, because like, are you really gonna drive to the movie theater and park and buy a ticket for a seventy minute, eighty minute movie?

But right, I'm like, I'm so touched when a movie's ninety minutes. It's like, you love respect my time.

I don't get it, Like, why are we trying to keep everything else so efficient? In our lives, but movies are getting so much longer. It's a really weird paradox. I feel like everything's like self checkout, Like everything's like go go go, and especially the American way. It's just like everything is catering to that except movies.

I think there's a well, no not. YouTube is also being like this. The most popular videos on YouTube are.

Like four hours long, yes, where they're like here's the history of fast Pass at Disney and it's like eight hours long and it has like seventy million.

I think this is a response to places like TikTok shortening everything. People crave just like sitting down with something for a long time and then want to read it.

Right, Yeah, reading books is like so out. People don't read anymore. It's really hard for me to do and I keep trying to do it.

It's tough.

What do you think about when Chris has a YouTube TV and I don't watch TV, but I'll see when he has sports on, Like it'll come on some themes and it'll be like here's a moment of zen and it'll just give you like some like you know, just like grass waving in the wind for about twenty seconds.

Why would they do that.

There has to be a monetary gain from that because they don't care about us having a second to meditate.

Why would as ad that they didn't fill.

There's no way they can't fill it with some bullshit like why not sell make a sell an ad for twenty dollars instead of that?

Like why put that there?

I think what happens is the ads that they are running are like through Fox, like NBC or and people like local ads will play there and YouTube won't do like the local like.

God YouTube, which is which uses Googles. This is this is right in Alley's wheelhouse. This is what she does for a living. Yeah, she points out stuff like that all the time, and she's like why didn't they fill that? Or then explains like there's just no.

Way they're doing it out of the kindness.

You need to be a trick to keep you watching, like oh you took a break.

No, we gave you.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying, Like if they, if.

They've done studies that it maybe keeps people watching because they're like YouTube cares about me.

Yeah, that's it.

Honestly, I feel like Google cynical enough to think that, like going like we could trick people.

To think Yeah, I mean they definitely have studied us, if they could study us and learn that, if we like there more, if we feel like they care about us, which we do, like we all want companies to care about us.

None of them do.

It's they wouldn't spend that much money if it's especially if it's like Sunday Take.

But if it benefited them, if it made if it kept people watching more than filling it with ads to generate a sense of it's like a palid corrus.

I like that as a theory, but I guarantee you it's due to some contractual. We can't play an ad here because we're running the Fox ads and we and maybe three years will be able to do it after the contract expired.

But there's no they would just not. No one's doing anything out of kindness.

No, no anything that well, at least corporation something. Your mother might do something out of kindness.

But I got into a fight with her this weekend.

We got into a huge fight.

We were in Vancouver for Aras tour and Mom, if you're listening, I'm really sorry because I should have just not just have left it. But like a thing that irks me that I think everyone does. Is like she was commenting on how beautiful Vancouver was and how it's kind of like reminiscent of Seattle, and I go, have you been to Seattle?

And she was like one time?

And I go, well, you could have gone twice because I feel my special there, but you guys didn't go, which obviously I'm still holding onto resentment of that. But the reason they didn't go, and I remember was because they had traveled too much that month, like they were for fun and stuff. But I'm like, oh, so they were just worn out from traveling.

They were older, And are you talking about your stand up special that's been nominated for a Critics Choice Award.

An Emmy, uh Grammy, and a Golden Globe.

Wait what so what is that is that? E got?

Wait?

Gray Grammy, double Globe, double Critics Choice.

So kicked.

Yeah yet gek.

I mean, I'm sorry to see a pattern that maybe they shouldn't come.

Yeah, pressure, Like she she was like, well, yeah, well we didn't go because we just we wanted you to just have that weekend. We were always at things and we just felt like we were just too much for you, and like and I go, no, you did it, like you're changing the narrative. It was because you guys had traveled too much and you were tired.

I mean Gail came. I mean if he came, then.

It's like you were You're I just don't like, we love Elon. There's one good Elon.

No, the reason they didn't come is because they were tired, which is totally fine, and I like, and yes, I can still give them ship about it. But it was like because they had traveled for fun too much, they couldn't come see their daughter taping future Emmy.

They were too poop from having fun.

Yes, but and then she goes, we just we She made it about her being like, you know, virtuous, like we wanted to step back and let you have.

We bother you too much on those things. And I go, that's not.

That's not what the story was because I and she goes, yes it was, and I go, I go, no, it's because you're tried to do it could be both, and I said it can be, but it wasn't. Because I go, I've invited you to hundreds of tapings that you have come to. Never once have you ever said when you when you had the energy to go to something. Never once had you said it's too much for us to be there. You don't want to deal with us, So

A moral justification for their behavior.

But but it all comes from a place of like not honoring what you want. Like you, I'm tired, that's reason enough to want not want to go to something.

You should just come up to you and say I don't want to go to your special I'm tired, yes, And.

That's would have been fine because I would I would have been a little hurt and been like come on, but ultimately yet I would respect that you you.

Don't want me to come here special? You hate me? Yes, you think I'm a piece of ship.

That's what it was.

And I was like, don't put me into this. Don't make me feel guilty about like.

It's your fault. Yeah, I'm such a shitty.

So we got into a really big fight, like right on the waterfront.

Presence will destroy yourself.

It was not worth it.

Yeah, honestly, everything can't be beautiful at the same time. And I feel like that generation like loves gas lighting.

It's how they like learn to live.

Yes, it's it's it's a it's a way.

To still feel comfortable in an uncomfortable moment.

Yeah, it really is about like, it's not about her wanting to kind of evade some kind of blame. It's like about her not wanting to acknowledge that her feelings matter. It really is like just her being like me, being tired is not enough to get out of something because I don't, I can't.

That's not an excuse enough.

I'm not important enough to like, you know, value that, so I have to make it about other things.

This like reverse Jewish mom guilt. This is like, what are you Protestant Catholic?

Uh, trickle down Catholic because.

It's like Catholic guilt, because Jewish guilt would be like the reverse where like you try to get your kid to do something by being like, you don't want to go to this, so I'm just a piece of that.

I would never do that, and.

This is the reverse because I don't want to go to this. I'm a piece of shit.

Yes, yes, my mom is the piece of ship. Yes, yes it is.

It is.

Oh, treat your mother like this, go ahead, why don't you just throw your beautiful mother?

Yeah?

I never related to that the Jewish mother Seriah Catholic.

Is I'm shihead and you don't want me around?

Hate me?

Yes?

Yes, yes, yeah.

My mom is Catholic, very Catholic, and she's the combination of the two is at times she's always putting it on me, So I'll let me know that, like she's she's base level guilt guilty at all times, but then puts everything on me. So I feel that guilt. But then also she will be like oh that it's like this could be the last time you ever see me.

Oh god will And then I'm like, oh cool, I'm going to target just thinking about my mom. God no, that's that's uh yeah to any mom's listening and my mom in general.

This is it's not about you. I have the best mom.

Ever.

It's like, I don't think there's a single mom who gets out of being ridiculed and over analyzed and being annoying to their kid. It's almost like makes you not want to have kids, because you know, no matter what you do, it's not good enough unless you have an Italian son.

They're going to hate.

You first stretches of time and resent you and say shitty things on their podcast, even though you're the best.

Speaking of Italian son, Luigi, what's.

His les name, it's as if it's like that that the rap generator name or what like it's Italian generator. Didn't who got their name from childish Gambino got his name from that generator alone? Yeah yeah, yeah, this looks like Okay, I know who he looks like now because I read on Reddit someone finally nailed it. Because I was like, he looks exactly like someone and it's Dave Franco.

That's what he looks like.

Yeah, another Italian.

He's very attractive.

Yeah, he's so handsome.

Do you think he's more attractive or less attractive now that he's shot somebody?

Oh well, less, I'm just have you pictures of people him with, like people at dinner and like him having friends. I'm just dying to know what he was like socially leading.

Well, he's a valed victorian of his high school.

Yes, yeah, he's from a super wealthy family in towns in Maryland.

Yeah, he's so well.

Really he I mean he's so cool. I think he's cool. Like everything I've learned about Bob.

Went to toowsand sorry number one there.

But there's an incredible thing where somebody found a tweet of a guy being like it from the summer being like, hey, I haven't heard from you in months, Like you promised me that you would be in my wedding, Please answer your phone, tweeted at him, tweeted at him.

Like his friend.

And then there's just like now like thirteen thousand quote retweets being like.

Dude was locked in.

He was so locked in he shut out printer.

Being friends with this like this guy had friends.

Yeah, Well, what's most compelling to me about this is, well, we have to go to break.

Okay, let's go to break and talk about Okay, back to this shooter guy.

What's most compelling to me about this is this, Uh, he got a surgery on his back, and they're saying that his personality changed after he got this surgery because he's he was in chronic pain and then he got this probably spinal fusion or something like that. And we all know that back surgeries have a fifty percent chance success failure rate, and there's a problem, thank you, we.

All know that.

Now there is a there's a good It's like a coin flip.

You don't know that.

Yeah, yeah, I saw Andrew. He was like not being like yeah.

Lah yeah, the cervix.

But I do believe that either he was driven mad by this surgery because of his interactions with the health insurance company. He also has two grandparents that died over the last like four five years into the theory that he had interactions with the health insurance company.

Then they died in twenty seventeen. I saw, Yeah, so it's been it's.

Been long enough for him to go nuts. So those that's a bullshit theory that, yeah, maybe.

You can't use your grandparents' death or anything. Oh I shot up at school because died from.

You could do when your grandparents die is write in my chemical romance out here that drummer died.

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm a favorite man.

But I do think that's possible. He was in horrible pain, and then he was dealing with the health insurance companies and they wouldn't pay for surgery. He probably was in financial trouble and that's why he targeted and read that book. Definitely that deny uh delayed whatever supposed deposed defend the too. That's my theory is that he this was a targeted attack because of a personal medical issue that was making him go crazy.

And then Brian sent to Chris and I yesterday like the Sarno book could have like all of this could have been avoided, right, just read the book about healing back page. You don't have to get a surgery. Let's if the if the surgeries would radicalize him. That's absolutely true that that book.

I'm sure he.

Probably addicted to the pills. I'm sure pain killers were, Yeah, and then he tried alternative medicine and mushrooms.

Yeah.

So many people are angry at insurance companies and are super smart geniuses and are in chronic pain that don't go this fall Like, yeah, it's gonna be. I wonder what we're gonna find out. It just sucks that we don't have information.

They and they're not gonna it's gonna be like it's gonna trickle out and then just stop.

And what about the picture of him?

Like I was reading on Reddit, people were like, when have we ever seen a purp shot from inside the cell where he's standing like he's asking his buddy to take his Tinder picture, like full body shot on a camera phone, like literally someone goes in the hit.

He was like, I look at the stuff all the time.

I've never seen this even once in my life of someone inside a jail cell standing upright, full body shot.

But that isn't a bug shot.

It's like the best mugshot I've ever seen.

Like the mugshot is not up against the wall like it it's crazy.

He has a well, he has a he's a political murdyr in a way, and he's doing everything that you would do if you were trying to start a movement.

Wait, what do you mean? What? What does he do? He didn't ask for the picture. He doesn't get to determine.

But the way that it's just like when Trump took his mugshot. He knew that this was a moment that he could use to fundraise. And this guy is using this the.

Hotter he is face or anything. He just stood this hot but he can't help it.

He didn't even high herett.

Yeah, he's like, yeah, I feel like.

He was leaning against a tesla.

Oh the gun in a way.

Well, I don't think anyone should get murdered. I do think this guy is like a JAG figure.

He's a hero. This is like when Ben Laden got killed.

Oh, it's like saying that.

I don't want to say that publicly. I don't think anyone should get murdered. Podcast however, I don't think anyone should get murdered. I don't think there should be a murder spree. However, it's been incredible to see the unity online between Democrats and Republicans, left and right, Fox News and CNN.

We haven't all collectively gotten together on something since the slap like we were saying before THELAP was the last time we all got together.

But just you can only drive people so far. And the fact of the matter is these corporations have given people truly no doubt for the way that they've been treated. Corporations are getting more more powerful and consumer rights are getting lower and lower, and people are like, well, what do we do? And the only answer is, well, I guess I'll just kill you. Yeah, I guess I'll just literally I can't do anything to fix this health insurance process.

Yeah? Yeah, yeah.

Now, well, someone was saying that, like, you know, they're upping their security, and someone had tweeted snarkily for it was like screenshotted that, oh, there could be another way that these people could protect themselves by maybe offering more healthcare to people, and it's like, well, that would cost money. Security is a lot cheaper. Security for billionaires is not expensive for them. What a couple hundred thousand.

A year of removing a million a year.

Yeah, a couple of million a year. That's a tax right off.

Yeah, like either that or give people healthcare, which probably.

People that that's the only that's the only thing that maybe if there was another way to do without killing some I could have tickled them.

Yeah, make them embarrassed.

No one should die.

I'm just saying there's like healthcare CEOs and so many people have been Yeah.

Yeah, well I saw a thing where they denied thirty two they're they're the most denial AI. Just yeah, this CEO is responsible for implementing AI claims reps to their company, and they denied the most out of any company. And then they went in they discovered that ninety percent of the AI claims were made falsely. Ye, were decided falsely. So people like they were wrong, they were wrong.

Yeah, that's annoying.

But what is there right and wrong? Like what is what? What is there? It does? It seems to be arbitrary?

What is That's how it feels.

I didn't even know there was a litmus to decide if it's right or wrong.

I mean I would assume it's all wrong if things aren't covered for a symptom of the thing.

Yeah, I feel like if you're paying into something and you you're paying us for this exact time to use it.

They should approve it, and they don't.

They did, they deny, they defend, they defund the police.

Yeah, it's it's I've been and then this plus the jay Z thing, it's been a very exciting tree insane news.

Yeah.

And I went to Aristora and Vancouver over the weekend and I was before the show.

I'm walking like.

On the floor, Uh, my mom and I are going to get water in between Gracie and Taylor.

Maybe it was even before Gracie.

And this girl comes at me and goes nicky and she gets a picture and it's like I'm a fan and she goes and oh, I'm a journalist and you know, I work for NBC or whatever.

And I'm like oh.

She was like, and did you hear jay Z accused of raping a thirteen year old with Diddy? And I was like what, And she's like, jay Z is we're accused of raping a thirteen There's like so many thirteen year old talent.

There's so many thirteen year olds. And I go, who's jay Z?

Exactly?

Yeah, no kidding, And that is exactly.

My mom goes who And I'm like Jay z Rape thirteen because it's so loud Lady Gaga's playing the pre music and and I go, no, my god. What she was like, you're gonna see it on your phone? And I opened my phone and it was nowhere to be found. And I even wrote to Emily. I wrote to Chris. I was like, did you see the breaking news? Because I'm in a bubble right here. I can't get good service. And I was like, Oh, this isn't gonna get as much traction as this girl is claiming. But then, I mean,

Are all the diddy rapes just gonna get swept under the rug? Is this another Epstein two point zero where it's just like we thought that this was going to like blow open the world, and then.

Chris was saying Cosby's free like nothing. Ever, he is one of the most prolific rapists of uh ever.

I mean yeah, he has almost as many rapes as albums.

I think it is hard when when there's so many, when you get so many rapes, it's hard to like pinpoint one, you got a pinpoint just one.

But yeah, yeah, that's true. There's there's a sweet spot number rap.

But I will say those Cosby accusers are all so famous now, like they got what they wanted. They were like they really wanted fame and notoriety because it's it makes you so instantly popular and like you can get on the cover of Vogue. If you just say that you've been raped by a comedian, it makes you like a global sensation overnight.

The cost accusers are hosting the Saco.

Something to tell you guys, jay Z rape me.

You know, Yeah, it's it instantly gets you.

He's blind, now, isn't he.

Yeah, one eye is like fuddling out. There's one like going bulging out.

The other way is still in prison.

R Kelly is yeah, that's right, we still have him in prison.

And did you see jay Z's apology, it's what it fell penny apology, no apology that he didn't even say he didn't do it, not at all in the whole thing.

Yeah, think of Blue Ivy, no proof reading. I think of my thirteen year old daughter.

He did voice to text on it.

Exclamation mark, exclamation marks, exclamation mark, too many exclamation marks. It really like, you know, just joking about this the serious issue. It was just like it gave old man chexting into his phone, screaming into the ether, if it gave face angry Facebook political posts.

Is he definitely also thinks he's completely untouchable, and like because.

You literally the dude.

The dude was a crack dealer who became a billionaire. Like, in what way do you think he's he thinks he's going to go down.

You're married, and she won Grammys for writing an album about you cheating, Like even your failures have turned into gold.

Let me ask a question. So I saw a picture of Beyonce and jay Z that they used in this article for them, and then Beyonce was wearing this They were at like the beach or something, and Beyonce had this makeup on where she had like green eyeliner underneath her eyes. Huh, how come that's not a thing? More often? I thought that looked really good.

Not over the don't know where this was going.

I think that's just a very specific makeup choice. That's too assume me for regular.

Let me find the picture because it didn't look constantly to me.

Okay, yeah, find the picture.

Find the picture.

That That sounds cool though, and I think that the reason is is because that would look insane on most people.

Anything it. Yeah, that's a good question though. Regarding all this, I think the.

Most important part of this jay Z story.

Yeah, yeah, but I just know that was a tense screening of Mufassi Less.

That was a weird vibe in the room. It was at a kid's movie.

That you know I loved.

I mean like they definitely had to have talked for like three hours about whether or not he should go.

Oh my god.

He was like, I'm going, I'm going, Yeah, I love Billy.

I want to know. I want do is he timoon?

I want to know so badly, Like how that response that he put out what came to be He's on the toilet, feverishly talking, texting it to his phone. Sends it does not run it by anyone in his I would say millions and millions of dollars of PR, like people that he's the team around him.

A PR person didn't even see it until we see No.

Way, I read it so differently.

I read it like it's been prepared ready to go.

No no, not like misspellings.

I mean, he's meant to say psychics, but he wrote physics like there was misspellings. It not one red petty made no sense to capitalize one red penny and like.

It just it's such a you can tell.

That's like when he was like holding his phone shaking streaming one read.

It was like gibs, but it didn't capitalize it.

So then he had to go and he had to hold it down and highlight it and then find the thing on his phone that caps it and because you know what doesn't do or he went all caps one read, but either way he had to like.

Go in underline.

It reminds me of when, like I have to remember sometimes I said this to you one time that Eminem must go to rhyme zone dot com.

It's just so cute.

To see someone so bad ass like having to do something like technical and like highlight it or like press it down and go where on the Google doc does it have the underline?

Do you?

Is it up on edits or tools? And he had to like ask blue Ivy for help on it. She's like that's how she finds out. He's like, someone's gonna tell her. It's like, no, Dad, I had to show you where caps or something? And why by the way, like we're talking about editing things, why can't you highlight something and then make.

It all caps? You'd go back and retype it in all caps? Yeah, why can't you in cap something?

If you if you get some more of these independent word processors you can take you do that?

Why are they holding that back from every single Like that's.

The easiest for the billionaires to use, not us.

Is that the picture of Oh that is very cool?

Okay, So that's like a dusting of green eyeshadow, like literally green eyeshadow on the under Like it's really cool. I'll try it and show you why I shouldn't.

And they're just at the beach. It's not like this as some kind of I.

Think that's an eye infection.

Oh well, yeah, it's also because Beyonce has an incredible face.

You could do anything. Why are people wearing more diarrhea.

Exactly on her head?

Like shee.

He also did two albums with R Kelly, and he's been friends with P Diddy for twenty I mean it's.

Like that's the thing is like you can't not at the very least, you know, Yeah.

He must have seen something.

Absolutely, But my mom said, and what is Julie Lazer? No? A lot, but she kept saying, I just keep getting shivers down my spine because I because my mom's been obsessed with this Diddy stuff.

So she's been watching tons of video and she's like.

And I haven't seen it, but she said there's a lot of footage of him at white parties where he's like, get the cameras off me, Like really weird about cameras at white parties, Like more than anyone.

Okay, I mean like he feels like the guiltyest bad in America. Yeah, like he's guiltier than the United Healthcare shooter.

But everyone split, Like Anya was like, this is the exact statement I would write if I were innocent, and I go, I have to say, literally everyone disagrees with you. Everyone, This is the most like people it seems the opposite vibe, but it's like teach their own feeling about it.

I'm not.

I think though he took the Trump approach where you attack, attack, attack right, and.

Trump is what innocent like, That's what I'm saying.

What it reads the biggest liar of all time. It does work. It's all the time.

The best to handle anything is to attack, yes, and not apologize, even though that makes you the biggest piece of shit in the entire world.

I will say that every time I have ever been in a fight with someone and I take full responsibility and I literally go, whatever you did was in a response to the shitty thing I did, Like I really like, you don't have to be sorry about anything.

I started this with all the shit.

It is never once not worked to mend a relationship, to make you feel you both feel better about it. And then that person who may or may not owe you an apology, never doesn't give you the what you need. Facts you may or it's not even I'm doing it to manipulate them into giving me apologies, but they never don't go, actually, you know what I could have been better to It always leads to that it's always good to just take full responsibility when you can.

Absolutely it softens the ground you're at even footing, and then all of a sudden, all of that anger washes away and you could actually just be real with each other.

Yes, yeah, if you have a pedophile and just apologize this work personal relationship.

Maybe if he gave her one red penny. Now that I'm a father, I would never do that.

I love Yeah, we love that father.

They would never rape, Yeah, the son of a mother.

Yeah, it's true. Like once they can become fathers of daughters, they like, I get it.

Now, you shouldn't rape people.

Yeah, And for some reason that gives that does give it some gravitas that even me, as a person who knows it's bullshit, kind of goes, oh yeah, they they would never do that.

But I wonder I was just thinking.

I think it was Whitney Cummings on her podcast was talking about the white parties, how that's like the worst color to wear at those freak offs, and that's how you.

Would know if you already raped someone, if they were just staying.

She's like, oh, maybe that's how they keep track of like, oh that person's been raped already, know, it's all Yeah, for come you just need yeah yeah, yeah.

Yeah, no but blood or okay, that's bad. Okay, Yeah, so you.

Really want a tark party, that's like, that's saying too much.

You're giving away the gates to be very.

Slippery with the baby oil. The baby oil. It's a slipping slide.

Yeah.

You know what I think they giveaway is the freak off party.

I love.

I love the idea of a white party where there it's transitioning to a freakoff and they're just waiting for one Gail King to leave.

They're all looking at their watch.

Like Oprah's gone.

Baby.

They all pretend to go to the valet to drive around the Yes.

Yes, because you know that the white party, like anyone that went to a white party doesn't mean they were involved in raping teenagers at all, but the freak offs for sure. Like if you were, you were either yes, watching or getting.

Yeah, Oprah was gone, like Connie Chung leg stayed.

Yeah, let him have some fun.

Yeah, I mean ops with Ga.

That's why I say, just do it all, do all the pedophile stuff before the party.

Get it out of the way. Then you can just hang out with Gail and not have you know, do it around, do it four pm, and.

They can get a home for home homework. I feel terrible about this. I want to apologize.

Let's talk more about shooting the CEO.

Let's get back to.

Everyone can agree on tonight. You're going to be on Kimmel when this comes out?

Oh my god, is it already happening? It's tomorrow?

What is this an appearance? Just an appearance for promoting something?

The Golden Globes?

Yeah?

Wait on ABC?

Yeah?

Yeah, they They.

Are so nice to me over there, Like Kimmel likes me. He's always reached out and said nice things. And uh yeah, it'll be my third time in a year being on Amazing Months.

I think, yeah, I think I'm gonna ask for advice.

I think, like, so, how these like late night appearances work, is that you?

They the producer.

I have a call with them actually right after this to talk about what I'm going to talk about tomorrow. They usually have like been combing through my Instagram, They've been listening to podcasts. They do a bunch of research, and then they have ideas of like, oh, I heard you talk about this thing. Maybe we talk about this. Jimmy asked you about this you went to the last aerostore,

You have so my god, you make my job so easy.

Yes, of course, like those late night shows, like the comedians come prepared.

I don't know why they don't book comedians almost they want.

To get they want to get bits in, they want to they care about this. And then like if you watch like just any celebrity, I'm not gonna name names, but like most of the time, it's like, so I just heard you. You just got back from Sweden. Yeah, and then they just talk about being at a hotel.

Daughter likes singing, yeah, and then it's like cut to the video of it.

That no one cares.

Yeah, no, she just started and we're really proud of her.

Yeah, so cool. Oh and she loves Wicked, right, and you took her to see Wicked?

I mean you heard about that. It's an interesting question because how many people ask.

That, Well, I was okay, so can I pitch something?

Hate when people do they always that's a really good question. Don't you hate when people.

Do that's I always say, that's a really good question. That allows me some time to think By saying it's a really good question, it's a really good question, it's just allow it buying you time to figure out what the fuck you it means.

That question makes me uncomfortable and I need a second, and.

You're like complimenting yourself through it. Somehow I don't.

Yeah, I have said it before because sometimes there are good questions, yes, and it does make me feel good when I have it said, but I would say fifty percent of the time I say it to someone.

It's buying me time.

Yes.

Yeah.

Uh So I was thinking of, well, I'm going to talk about possibly talk about a show that Shawn and I did together that we've on this show that was like the worst show of my life because Chris Rock also just had a headline where he walked out of a billionaire's show.

That he had to do.

Yeah, apparently he made a joke about putting Mexicans on a plane or something and then he found saw someone filming him and he didn't want a Tony Hinchcliffe moment, so he walked off stage because someone was filming him, and people are saying, oh, he walked off because he got caught saying a racist joke. And it's not that he was just doing a dumb joke. Yeah that's it's a private event, but it was. It was a private

You'd give them what they want before they bring in.

The And this person filming wouldn't stop filming, and.

I guess someone was filming, and he walked off stage like fuck this, I'm not doing this and walked through the crowd and just left, which I wish I would have done, except I would have walked into the ocean yet.

Right there.

So yeah, Sean and I had this gig in Cabo that was fucking terrible and one of the worst hours of my entire higher life. And U and so I might talk about that because I just think that people love to hear about comedians having a shit gig, and it's especially funny when it was literally a month ago and.

A lot of people don't know about these types of gigs that comedians do get hired by corporations to do like like events for the.

Staff dance monkey dance.

Yeah exactly, and then you get hired by these billionaires just to make their parties seem more cool.

Yes, And so I think I'm going to talk about that.

And then there was a moment at Eras where a girl was in front of me standing up and I pushed it on my story, but she was like had her phone above her head, like put her hands all the way up to get out of the you know, to go above all the people doing it in front of her. And she was five ten I think already. And then her with her arms up it was like six foot two, six foot seven foot three with the arms fan with arm what is that?

Like?

How much arm? Am I getting half feet feet above my head?

Yeah?

Oh no above your head? Maybe like two feet above your head. You have a pretty long arm.

Okay, So she was, you know, seven and a half feet tall in front of me forty percent of the show before Taylor even got on stage, and she didn't even know Gracie Abrams.

She could do it for.

A short amount of time.

Yeah, one song, this is.

What I said, I want to kind of go through like the etiquette of like going to a concert, and because I think that could be like a fun clip to pass around of like here's because I just think based on what I've read from people going to Charlie XCX and people going to Sabrina Carpenter and all these like girly like people are just rude at concerts. They're singing too loud, they're not appreciate it, they're not thinking about other people around them. When you're okay, here's a

To put it.

I I this did not occur to me until way later because I was going to Ara shows and during Marjorie the song about her Grandma, everyone does that and it looks really cool and you're really doing it for her.

You're not really even doing it for yourself.

You're like doing it for Taylor so she can see like this amazing mass of like people with their lights up. You don't need to lift it. You could just put it right in front of your face and not ruin anyone's view and the light is still being shown. It doesn't change that it's higher for her. Like you know, you don't need to block anyone's view. Just put the light right next to your head and sway back and forth.

I agree with the with the electronics, but I have the I had the opposite experience where I was at the Billy Joel concert and Ali and I stood up and we were dancing. That's different, and then someone threw stuff at us almost immediately.

But how were you dancing.

Than you are.

You're not raising your lots to capture a video that you're not going to fucking do any with. Then you watching them capture is ship. Their phone screen is smudged so it's blurry. They're not even doing the thing where you tap it and then you lower the resolution or lower the brightness so that she pops on stage.

Looks horrible.

They don't have a YouTube account where they're feeding this to the masses like this is just for them to watch alone in bed later and wake up their boyfriend because they don't have any detail.

Their friends that they went to the contra.

I guess, but like it's not even good footage. It's like I have a right to do it, which I don't do it. But if anyone has a right to be making ruining other people's time, it's because I capture good footage that is literally being fed to a Taylor Swift fan account that I send her or all my dropbox videos so she can make videos of it and seminate it two hundreds of thousands of Swift tees who are enjoying it. So I'm actually making content for the

And just holding it up so I can capture that I was there, Like.

You can send it to your sister and be like, look, at me.

She won't even watch it because it's unwatchable. It doesn't even look good. So everyone's time.

It's not about how the quality of video. It's about you going I'm better than you because I'm at.

This selfie of yourself being there.

That's all you need. Me don't need footage of it. Everyone's look around you. Everyone's capturing this moment.

Watch it.

There's literally every single moment that she was on stage and eras, there's fourteen different angles of it captured really well onto movie, YouTube and Instagram. But even if you want your specific show, you know, like I always tell people when there was going to shows, don't film everything, like you can find this show on YouTube, shot better from a better angle than where you were. Like, just relax, and usually I'm no one shooting it. Like I did.

I was filming what she's filming.

Maybe that bitch has her own tailor's sid account that she's trying to build.

But I understand, but she shouldn't because she was bad at videography. She was horrible I was filming what she was filming to prove that it was getting I became upset.

I couldn't relaxing her.

I was hoping someone will again because.

I would love you.

Yes, I have.

And then I had my.

Mom take a video of me filming so I could show it because I knew people are gonna be like, Nikki, how can you complain about this girl? Now you're posting video of Taylors, How did you get that? I'm like, here's how I got it. You hold it right in front of your face so that you're not blocking anything that's not already blocked. And I would say to the short girlies who wrote to me and said what am I supposed to do? You can absolutely do the thing

Shut, and we're trying to watch.

You with your window open. Y so you can read your book with natural light. I hope you get skin cancer from the natural light coming through.

I really hate you. I think it's so people are just it is there.

We're living in a world where people do not care about other people and like don't even consider other people's experiences around them at all.

Sharing space, Like it is completely just disintegrated.

Since twenty twenty.

What's going on?

I mean, they're getting it right in Tokyo and in uh North or South Korea.

North Korea, they're really getting it right. They don't even have they don't even have windows.

Upbreak, Okay, let's.

Take a break and I'll come back.

And this final thought, has it really been since twenty twenty that this has gone to shit? Like Anya wrote to me today, She's sitting in a diner and she said, there is a woman who is on speakerphone with someone on FaceTime, talking so loudly at this diner and everyone's dining quietly around us, and the table next to them are trying to get worke done and they can't.

She was like, I can tell they're annoyed.

I'm annoyed, and I go say something and she goes, I can't, And I knew exactly what that meant. She couldn't say something. I go, just do it, but she goes, Nikki, I can't. I'm going to look a certain.

Way if I do.

And I was like, oh, okay, that makes sense. Well now, yes, we understand now why you can't.

No, But I feel like after twenty twenty, when we were all locked down like for a while, like being away from everyone for like nine whole months, no one assimilated.

Well when things opened up.

Well it's a combination of that and also everyone was being told what they can and can't do, which just it woke up something inside us.

Yes, the mask thing, the mad thing.

You can't go outside, you can't go to a restaurant, and for certain people that makes them go insane.

It turns out I am such a sub like where I'm like, I love when people tell me what I get to get do.

It like I can't imagine even like I would never listen to anything on my phone at full volume. I hardly ever do it when they're friends around who aren't like really being working on something, and they're just they're on their phones too, and it's something I even want them to hear. Kind of like I wouldn't even do it then, kind of I can't imagine like the psychopathy of someone who would listen to something. And I know this has been fully discussed online. We all are perplexed

What's going on?

Yeah, I really think they should. Let's let's get Luigi on it. And I hardly think these people it's such an anti social behavior that they need to. Like yesterday, Benedict Politici was on a plane and he tagged me on it because he I started this thing of on

Sometimes you can do that for an Uber driver, like yes, I get, let's have the juice, yea.

If I'm going to talk anyway, But I'm not screaming in a way that is like obnoxious in a place where people my Uber drivers not trying to sleep right now where everyone else on this plane, I don't.

Mind according like when you're waiting for the plane to take off. I don't mind when people are on their phones because that's like fun little thing to listen to. But what you can't do it on the plane?

You ever ever have your phone? Your volume on your phone?

No, no, I'm talking about someone talking into a phone.

Even that is rude. The moment you're.

You are, you are now a part of a group and that and that.

Group does not ask this home for you. No no asking people.

I have no fun on a planet.

I am zerio fun on a plane. He is, He's a three for sure. I'm the same way. I'm a three.

Guess the three can I?

Can?

I say?

I had?

I had instant karma happened to me at the gym, which is the exact same thing happened. So I go to the gym and I have my headphones into my phone, and a few days ago, I got a phone call while I was at the gym listening to music, and I answered it and I was like, Hey, I'm at the gym, but like you can talk to me, and I can talk like pretty quietly. And I looked around me. I had like an hour long phone call. I looked around me. Everyone else has headphones in so I was like,

I think you're listening to the CARDI.

I was at the gym or the diner, I got a phone call from the same person and I was like, oh, yeah, I can. I can just talk on the phone of the gym now. And I saw there was a couple of people who didn't have headphones in and then I go and I go do sit ups on the you know when you hang on the stit ups and you're hanging upside down basically, Yeah, and my phone fell out of my pocket and it broke my headphones, so I

Right, You're right. I shouldn't be doing that.

Yeah, I made a mistake.

And headphone, I guess what.

Speakers on phones and they can pick microphones on phones can pick up your normal voice. There's no almost never a reason to yell unless you are on the stock trading floor in nineteen ninety four. Yeah, like, there's no there's no reason to ever scream on a phone ever. But people can't help themselves. And Americans are just notoriously

Oh wow, and especially on vacation.

And she wasn't saying sorry, so it was just like, yeah, oh, what was it? Oh? I had an interaction that was really bad with someone where I oh, oh, oh, I can't tell it.

Fuck, I guess yeah, oh, go ahead.

I mean to talk about that tall woman like you kind of expect better from Canada.

Of like, oh, and this girl she had her boyfriend with her who was like all over her, but she was kind of like, ugh, So my mom and I determined like one hundred percent he got her their Aristore tickets and she's gonna break up with him right after because he couldn't stop touching her. I am so disgusted by couples that need to constantly rub each other's fucking backs at a show to show you how much in love they are. I'm again, thirty seconds at a time is fine, not the whole goddamn show.

We get it. You're so in the just stay home and grope each other.

I don't have to say that.

I don't need to, and maybe I'm jealous, but I don't think I am.

It's just too.

Much PDA, Like I was like grossed out by PDA in my twenties, Like I truly, I truly do not need to go to Alivia Rodrigo concert and see somebody get fingered.

Yeah else, Yeah, I mean that is why I'm there to do it, not to watch it.

Sometimes I hear someone like I'll just be walking in a hotel thing someone laughs and the laugh is so uproarious and loud. I get angry.

There's nothing in the world or a sneeze that's loud.

Oh well, the sneeze, that's different. I think that the laughs. I'm like, there's nothing in the world that's as funny as you're laughing.

That woman has a crush on someone nearby. And because women, women do a thing. I mean I know that I have done. Like when you are horny for someone, you'll laugh really out and like throw your head back and like it's like orgasmic. And so it's a way of like signuring like this is what it looks like when I'm coming, Like.

Wow, that's interesting. So if I think about it that way, it makes it a little better.

Yeah, And you get angry when women come.

And some people also have very annoying laughs I am one of these people not loud, and it's I've ruined many comics like album recording.

Yeah, No, your laugh is great. I would, I would, I would.

Your current or change it?

I know it's still there. I came out last night and I heard myself do it. It sounds like I can't. I can't do it.

You can't do it artificial.

No, it's not artificial, but it sounds fake.

No, your laugh is great. I totally disagree. I but I want to say one more thing. So remember when I went to the concert in Indy with my mom and there was a woman that like snuck into our section and she kind of smelled bad and she was just like taking up too much space.

And then I got her kicked out.

Yeah, and I told her to move and then she moved in front of us, and I was like, I forget what the interaction was, but she took a picture of me.

Do you remember that girl? And then I go, bitch, I took a picture of you.

Don't even don't even try to post that like I got you too, Like we're both on I am. I We're at Vancouver Eras and I go, mom, look who it is? And fucking snuck in our row again, the same gutter punk bitch, the same woman with her little twitch like squirrel, with like Rabi's behavior, and she's by herself and she says the fun she makes me so sick, and I.

She's snuck in again.

And then she didn't fit in our roast as she moved to the one in front of us, and she's just she's not even paying attention to the show. She's just on her phone, just trying to get footage, and like her energy makes me sick. I know I'm being so mean because she's probably just like a struggling person, but I don't think she just was the And I was so wanting to sick a security guard on her, but I was like, no, be a better person, just let her enjoy her night. This girl literally probably doesn't

But I took another picture.

Of her and she saw me too, and I just goes like, mom, there she is in my Mom goes no, and I go from Indianapolis. She goes, no remind me, and I pulled up the other picture.

I go, that's her second direct. But then also have the money to buy these tickets.

She was the she's my mortal enemy. I just I can't.

Stand the show fish like fish.

I mean, I'm the same thing, you know, like we're doing the same thing.

But she but she's I would never ever have a seat in a section that I didn't like and then try to weasel my way to the front by finding like she was a weasel and she's by herself, and she was trying to blend in, like these people are just disgusting, like stay in your seat, I understand, Like I just, I was really just I don't know why she because I I guess even when I have shows and there's a couple of seats in the front row that I see empty, I'm like, someone should come over here and get them.

So I'm a hypocrite, But she really bothered me.

If she would have just done what she did at Eras Vancouver, I would have liked her and been like, oh, her shirt's cute and fun. But because of my indie interaction and then seeing her again and like you made it here too.

You're beginning to understand how racists feel.

Yeah, oh yeah, that's interesting.

Yeah, don't understand.

Could you smell her again? No?

No, And I didn't smell her the first time. My mom said she was really bad.

But man, I just it's not fair when you just don't like the way someone moves. You're just like, this isn't fair, Like that's not for.

Like a boyfriend or something, or just like everything you do.

And it's all based on like something from my past. She reminded me of someone I can't.

I try to be a benefit doubt, like, oh, they don't do this that often, like someone on a plane will get up right away, or they'll do something they'll grab your chair when they stand up.

Oh gosh, I lose my mind over.

But then I'm like, oh, maybe they just don't fly a lot. And I try to be empathetic, but it's like how do you not know? Like how are you just not a human being?

You just don't understand how the Golden Rule didn't get Like I remember learning about the Golden Rule and being like, oh my god, that's such a great way to move through life. Just picture only do things that you would want like think it's it's it's almost a selfish way to look at things, like should would I want to be next to someone who's loudly listening on their phone. No, so I'm not gonna do that, Like yeah, it's not even like being nice to others. It's actually like I'm

So I didn't need to say anything. But I would have said something.

What I was going to say is just show her the picture of herself and say, would you like this in front of you the entire show.

That's what I was going to That was my plan of being like.

Hey do you mind Maybe At first I was going to say, hey, do you mind like recording just a little bit lower? And then if she gave me as tod, I go, would you like this in front of you? Because I could stand in front of you and do it if you if you think that's an acceptable Wait, I was gonna then start some shit, yeah, because that's the truth. It's like, would you want this, then don't do it?

I think it might be because that there's now we're blending our online personality, which is becoming half of our life, with our in public personality, and it's becoming we're getting less practice at interacting with people in the real world. Right everything is online. I mean everything that's important is online. Yes, everything that you do, even when you do stuff live, all that matters is what happens the next day on the internet.

Oh.

I said the most awkward thing yesterday to the barista that I'm friends with at the Starbucks down the street, like we're buddies. Like I see him twice a day every day, and I go.

Hey, David, good to see you again. I go, how's it going.

He's like it's crazy out there, Like he must have had like a day or something. He's just but it sounded like he was talking about the world. He's like, you know, what's wild? And I go, I know, jay Z raped a thirteen year old And I said it, like not loudly enough for anyone to like be disturbed. You could just tell that was like not what he was.

I thought he was kind of like god the news cycle and he was like, yeah, it was just so it was and thank god he's like a nice guy who like knows my sense of humor because he knew who I was.

But like, it just didn't land right, and I was obsessed with that at that moment. Like of course, to me, it was just like a colloquial thing to say, yeah, yeah.

Just disappoint us so much.

He's stating that at Starbucks at on Sunset West, Sunset is altaaloma, I think, and Sunset.

Is a is a real one.

That's it for us.

Yeah, thank you so much for listening. We'll be back tomorrow with more show with the same group. I can't wait. And we'll recording it tomorrow so you're not getting a doubled up one and watching.

On Timmel tonight and go'll be kissed Ye.

The Nicky Glazer Podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeart Podcasts. Created and hosted by me Nicki Glazer, co hosted by Brian Frangie Executive produced by Will Ferrell, Hans Sonny and Noah Avior edited it engineered by Lean and Loaf, video production Mark Canton and music by Anya Marina. You can now watch full episodes of the Nicky Glazer podcast on YouTube, follow at naky glazer Pod and subscribe to our channel