Feeling mighty aimless like Aloysius J. Pig: your stout toe. I'm feeling pretty shameless like about a toe. Ah, don't think I am blameless. Man. Less less. Aloysius J. Pig: Yep, all of this is making me feel stress, stress stress who's? Oh, now? This is where things usually go off the rails. Hello?
Who would order some pizza pie? What? In the Huckleberry hound Who Have you ordered a pizza? Pizza Pie? You call me up for the pizza pie? Oh brah Jada pizza pie. i i I don't know what's happening right now.
I've no one here ordered any pizza pie and I don't recognize you and
you don't recognize me. It's me. The private Aloysius J. Pig: time natty I swear to you. If I can get to the door. I would leave right now. I do not understand what is happening. There. Usually a lot of shenanigans here at the bumper podcast headquarters wherever we are. Yeah, but this is a little bit overboard. Who is this? Dude?
I don't know. I think Did you say you were a private private?
Yes, I did say that. I am not a private guy. I'm the private guy. I'm in private. I'm via private die. Oh,
okay. Okay. i Okay. Okay. I see what's happening here. Like, like, Okay, Aloysius J. Pig: can I do a little splaining? Because I don't I don't know what's I don't know. You can maybe tell me you tell me because I'm here. I've been feeling terrible that we haven't had a podcast forever because Sir Reginald stole everything. And last week, you guys seemed really sad. And so I was like, I gotta get everything back. I gotta I gotta fix this. And I
gotta make it right. And I didn't know what to do. And so I actually went I found Yellow Pages what a Yellow Pages. What Aloysius J. Pig: are you talking about? Yeah, I forget. You're young. So yellow pages before there was phones, iPhones and computers and Google and all this stuff. If we wanted to find someone, if we wanted to, like find anything, you had to go into a telephone book? Aloysius J. Pig: What do you mean is like a book in the shape
of a telephone? Or is it like, is it look like? Like a, like one of my mobile phones? Like when like that? No, no, no. A wait. And where did you get to move we? Whose head are you on? Are you on? Is it to figure that out? No, it was just a book, like a regular book that you would look through with words. And it was all in alphabetical order. And there were people like with their names and their telephone
numbers and addresses addresses. And then it was also there was a section called the yellow pages where they would have businesses and stuff so you could find them. Aloysius J. Pig: Oh, not this sounds torturous this as it's just how did anybody get anything done? I mean, at this point, I have a hard time going from the couch to the refrigerator to to get a nice beverage, you know, it's a lot
of effort for me. What I like to do is I look at my phone, and I say, hey, telephone came out and it's like, what can I do for you pig and then you're doing it but I say that phrase, and then I say please deliver me a nice delicious beverage to the couch. And that's really it's magic is practice basically I live in I live in Magic World Magic land if you will. I guess so. Right. You're basically a pig wizard
long enough and I feel like you're ignoring him. So I'm gonna say hello. Wait, Aloysius J. Pig: it's still it's voice has changed. We see a real voice can you what is what? What is your name? What is your business? What are you doing? Well, people going man, that private i but you can call me pi we're gonna call you pi like like,
i e why don't I private? I get pie. I do not understand. Aloysius J. Pig: So pi is basically I mean it's just your Take whatever you want. You can have a savory pie. Or you can have like a delicious fruit. I like talking about him. I was talking about him. Oh, you were talking about not about actual pies but Aloysius J. Pig: yeah, okay, I get it all right. I got confused. I'm hungry if I'm gonna be honest. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Ready as you are. Okay. Thank you. So, what is p i e private?
i What is the Aysen for
you got the private through got the eye the eye stands for incredulous incredible Oh, cube. Oh, no, no, no, no intelligent. No, this is all the AI words.
I mean, it feels like you haven't fully flesh out your character and that's fine. But the I I'm just I'll call you pi or private. Aloysius J. Pig: I'm just gonna call you private is kind of ridiculous. So my other question private eye is Wait, your voice is very strange. Is that your real voice? Is it some sort of an act?
Hold on while I take off my gas? Oh, look at me. No.
Now you look like the person in the picture now I recognize Yeah, okay. Yeah, Aloysius, this is the guy that I called. Okay, now he comes very well reviewed. Was that nice? So, you know, I guess I'm gonna have to trust you. Aloysius J. Pig: Okay. So my other question fine now we know who he is but the voice that that seems it? I don't know.
You talking about my voice? That's because I am a master. Okay. All language arts
I've I guess I could see how that comes in handy in your line of work, especially with the whole costume saying,
Hey, would you like to hear my Russian voice Aloysius J. Pig: is really embarrassing nagging
from the mothers? I'm from Russia. No, no, you know, okay. Let me help you out. Okay,
that's terrible. Like that's really not good.
I don't find the roads a dialect. But now you want to you're going to hear my French? My French my French voice Hold on one second. Ah, no friends. No, you're
no, no one
day, Tuesday, Wednesday, Aloysius J. Pig: Thursday, days of the week. Listen, pi. Can you I these voices are terrible and borderline problematic. Can you please just what is your Can you talk to us in your normal? Whatever your normal voice is this? You know, like, we're just three people hanging out in a room and then you're going to just talk to us. Okay, are you sure that you want
to absolutely 100% 1000 million 100% We're sure please just talk to us and you're Aloysius J. Pig: now just now. So yeah, okay, this is that was I actually made my skin like I skin is crawling. Like I feel like somebody just threw cold water. I mean,
a lot of people they say voices off putting 10 No, no, I can't disagree with
I am hesitant to do this. But I also I have goose bumps and you know, you talk how you talk and that's totally fine. You should be proud of how you who you are and how you talk. But maybe could we just do like a toned down version of the pizza man that when you first came in, I think that would be maybe okay with with me.
Oh, here we go. Aloysius J. Pig: Okay, thanks. Thanks. Thanks. Tell me if this is okay.
It seems better. But just you don't have to do like the the affectations like the tele me if you could just say tell me and I think we'll be okay with that.
We'll work on it. It's difficult. All right, cool. My characters down I've spent a lifetime building them. Okay. You Aloysius J. Pig: sound you sound like a little bit like a robot in Sicily, which is okay. You know, Sicily? What? Yeah. What did you What did you hire this private eye for?
So when we were at our storage unit, and Sir Reginald came, and he cleaned all of our podcasting equipment. That was like a while ago, and we haven't been able to do the bumper podcast. And in theory, I have exciting news that's coming up. But it's not going to happen if I don't have if we don't have podcasting equipment. So we need to we need somebody to help us because I've looked, I don't know how to find Sir Reginald, you know,
I looked through the phonebook that you looked at the phone book from like, 20 years ago. And you didn't you didn't come up. Did you? Set it down? alphabetical. Did you look into sir, or Reginald Sir like what do you that? Era? Did snot gonna work?
Yeah, the phone book is a good D to
get your you've become a real amalgam. I feel like you've gotten lost in your characters. You've you've you, you're maybe embarrassed of how you talk. And so you've created all these other characters to express yourself. Yeah, that's that's, that's rough. It is.
Also part of No, I can't like It's really confused me. I don't know how to talk anymore. My whole career is ruined. Aloysius J. Pig: Yeah. You know what a lot of people who come on this podcast say the exact same thing. They're like, Oh, I was doing so good in my career and then I got booked on the bumper podcast and then all of a sudden the phones stopped ringing the doors stopped knocking that people stopped coming and everything no light coming so when I get there there's
there's so many people who have been on the podcast who have just exploded into fame into the stratosphere into the universe. They've just gone on to be Aloysius J. Pig: Could you name one yes. One made okay. One peanut Lou. Was he was in commercial for one of those those beds that can like in like, lift up from the back, remember that? It was like a cat bed and it would lift and it would get hot and cold and everything. Yes, see, pig he. He knows pretty bad.
Aloysius J. Pig: I totally forgot about 30 beds. What was their tagline? No, they'll how they'll have you feeling feline? Feline. Fine. Yes. All right, her baby beds. Feline fine. It was a lot of wordplay a lot of puns. He did great in that commercial. Anyway, back to the task at
hand. We need our podcast equipment. Private Eye over here is obviously a master of disguise and different characters and hopefully has the detective skills to do exactly what we need so that we can get the show back on the road. Aloysius J. Pig: You sounded like you were doing the build to the end of the podcast so it would end right it broke but you did you missed it by like 40 seconds just all right. Yeah, so
try harder. Look at the clock. Yes, so private. I you're gonna you're gonna do this for us. You're gonna find Sir Reginald, are you going to help us get the bumper podcast back together?
Incredibly lucky that I'm gonna take this case on and we're gonna start on the basket of coffee cane howling Aloysius J. Pig: voices like the ghost of a marshmallow that fell into a vat of honey that that was that was eaten by a sloth.
The bumper podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp with Natty Bumpercar and some of his pals. It is family friendly, clean and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you love our show, and you'd like to help support the podcast, check out our Patreon page at https colon forward slash forward slash www.patreon.com forward slash Natty Bumpercar also pretty please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts, share it with everyone everywhere. post about it on all of the social
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