Unghosted with Kaitlyn Bristowe (part 2)

care for each other. We are very much friends, and that side of our lives is very good. And I'm glad we had a chance to talk about all that, and I'm glad you got to hear it and and hash it out with us and see how we communicate, and see how friends should communicate, spouses should communicate, and try not to things so personal that it will make

a situation toxic that you can't recover from. And so I'm glad everybody got to share in that very personal, intimate conversation that Caitlin had, and I appreciate her sharing that with all of you as well. But there was so much more to talk about, and so I want to get back to my conversation with Caitlin, and that takes us into you hosting the show. And I'm not going to call you a mentor because that's bullshit. You two were hosting the show. What was that like for you?

So bizarre? It was? It was a lot of things. I mean it was. It really did feel. First of all, when I went into it blind. I got there and started reading off of prompter and I was like, oh, okay, so we are definitely hosting. Like that's when I knew it was actually when it was happening, and I had so many different feelings. One, I respect the hell out of you for doing that for that many years, and

how good and the professional you are. It is really challenging. UM. And when people say Chris Harrison has the best job in the whole world, yes, but they're underestimating how much work you put into that and all of the you know, hours and time away and hard work and up late nights like you really do a lot UM. So I was having a lot of um respect for you in those moments. And also I loved it because I love hosting. UM. That's why I started a podcast. I love being a

host of something. I love having people over, love hosting dinner parties. I just love hosting, and that to me was like the ultimate hosting role. Um. But then I also felt guilty. There's times I was feeling guilty, like you know, imposter syndrome, and why do I deserve to have this or be here? What? And then on another level, I'm feeling, well, why can't I do this on my own? Why do they need two of us? Why do they not just trust me by myself? Or what? Like so

many emotions, the full spectrum like emotions. Yeah, I the only thing that really upset me when I heard that you and Tatia were hosting was that it was you and Tatia and that they named two of you, because that was you were doomed to fail. You were set up to fail. That was never going to succeed that show. I mean again, and I know it intimately more than anybody is there's not room for two people. There's not

room for two mentors. There's there's not room for two emotions, and that that mental space that you're taking over, and so that was just never going to work. And that to me, if I had been involved with you and Tasha, that's That's what I would have expressed is I don't see how this is going to work. And again I wasn't watching the show. And that's not because I was mad at you, guys. I just I removed myself and

I wasn't watching the show. It's like, why am I gonna go stare at you know, an old girlfriend, UM make love to somebody else. So I just removed myself from that and didn't watch. But I kept in touch with a lot of people that were in production, and I just felt for you guys because I knew how awkward and tough that situation was going to be. Yeah, it was too bad because I mean I love Taitia and it was thank god we got along because that

would have been even worse if we didn't. Um, But we did and we had a great time, and it just it did. It did feel like, um, it took away the level of profession to like it didn't feel professional to have to and then it kind of made us feel silly and goofy with each other where we didn't take it as serious as one person would have. And like you said, there's really there really isn't enough room for two people to be in that position um

and that I don't know why. I was shocked when they were like, and we're not having you back for next season. I was like what They're like, you probably saw this coming, and like I did it. I did not. I actually did not. But it's because you know, Tasha had COVID at the end, and so I had to do it by myself. And I took it so seriously because I was like, this is a big job, like, as you know, the biggest news to fill. And I

was like having that imposter syndrome. But I was like, Okay, maybe this is proof that one of us can do it, we can do it on our own, that we don't need to rely on the other person. Um. But yeah, So when they were like, no, it's not happening, I was like, cuckoo coole. I actually did not see that coming. I now looking back, and of course that would never work to have two hosts for the rest of you know, what are they going to do well? And to have

two women hosting the bachelorettes. So now you really have three women. Yeah, that's that's a that's a lot in that space. And I just I was like, I don't know how how you're set up to succeed there. Yeah, no, we definitely were not set up to succeed. And I was worried because I've carved something out and created something over twenty years. You were thrown into something pretty tumultuous and emotional in a heartbeat. And what I was afraid

was being guided in a direction that I wish, you know. Again, my producer side of me was like, man, I wish I could really dive in and save this. Yeah, I bet do you miss it? Um? I miss hosting television. Just I'm like you. I love I love my career I've had. I love hosting, I love producing. Um, you know, whether it was The Bachelor, Miss America, who wants to be a Millionaire? I mean, I've done a ton of work over twenty or thirty years, and so I love

that I miss people on the show. I missed the people, you know, some of the people that you got to work with, as you know, the most talented crew in the world, and I love and adore them. They are so amazing at what they do and it was an honor to kind of be their face and their their voice for so many years. Um. But the overall show, no, no, I don't. I don't honestly, Yeah, that ship is sailed and it was wonderful and I and I don't say

that with any um bitterness. I just it was a you know, there's a time and a space for all relationships, and and that got me from here to there, and it was a wonderful relationship that changed my life and I will forever be grateful for that. Um but it's it's there's a time to move on and and it's time. Yeah, I feel like you were at a place like when we had done my podcast years ago, I had asked you when you would retire, and it was getting to

be around that time. So I'm like, I wondered if you know, because obviously you would have chose differently on how to leave, but I wondered if you were ready. Yeah. You almost got me drunk enough to admit it on that podcast that I was ready to go, and I was.

You know, Lauren has even said to me now that we have become so much more intiment and close and and our feelings, She's like, wow, now that I see you now, I can see just how mixed you were with your emotions on on leaving this show and when that was going to happen. Um, there is this side of me that, hey, be grateful, you have an amazing job, and I did, and it was spectacular to have one of the best jobs in all of broadcasting and a franchise that changed television and going to go down in

the history books. I mean, when you what are you gonna do? You know, it's not like people ask Tom Brady, Hey, you're tired of playing football, when are you gonna go try something else? You're tired of winning Super Bowls? Um. But but I did get to that point where I'm not getting as much out of this relationship and therefore not I'm not I'm not giving it as much as

I should, and it was time. It was definitely time. Well, I will say I've never received so many comments in my life as p Pill being like, the show is not the same without Coreon literally, but it's true, it

really isn't the same without you. Well, I appreciate that, and I and I saw those comments and part of me, you know, honestly, part of me loved it, but no part of me, part of me felt bad because again I thought, they just they're they're not in a situation where they can succeed, and I I do love you too. I love Tasha, and I love you and I want

what's best for you. And so even in that weird moment that was so awkward, I still wanted you guys to succeed and be seen as successful and I just knew that wasn't possible, and I was that bummed me out because then, you know, on top of that, I felt a little bit responsible for it because of this whole situation, and I'm like, well, that sucks that you guys have this opportunity to have this break, but you really don't because because it's set up in this way. Yeah,

I mean there is no training involved. There was no It was kind of just like go out there and be yourselves. And when you get to giggly girls together and trying to host a show with so much emotion, as you know, and then to have that much estrogen flowing, and you know, it was it was a roller coaster. And then you have the feelings of like ETSD where I'm back in the situation that I have like I'm having too much empathy almost for the for the lead,

because I'm like, oh gosh, I've been here. And then you it's it's kind of nice to be able to separate yourself from it, as like you know, a role where this is what you're meant to do, where I wanted to like save them, and that can't work. As you alluded to, it's it's not uh an easy gig. It is. The hours are extreme, the travel is extreme. You are sleep deprived, you are malnourished, you are beat up, and you're either freezing or you're hot. And so again,

it's a job. And so I'm not saying what was me, but it's like there's a lot that goes into it for yourself and you have to overcome that because all you can do is emotionally be there for that person you're trying to serve. You know, when I would I would walk into a situation with you and you know it's four or five in the morning, and I know you're tired and emotional. Well, I can't be right. I need to be there for you, and I need to be happy, and I need to be peppy or I

need to be on whatever level you are. And so that's hard as a host because you're always emotionally entering a situation where it's not about you I emotionally needed to be about the other person. That's a really good point, which I don't think people realize how draining that is on because you're literally just having to be a chameleon

to whoever like that, whatever their emotion is. Yeah, and it's I mean, look and when you and you're going through things, I mean, you're you're going through your life. I'll never forget Ashley uh, Ashley's season when I was going through my divorce and I think we're I think we're in Thailand and I was going through I mean literally going through it at the moment, because it's how

play around the world in time difference. It's three in the morning or whatever, during a roast ceremony and I'm about to walk in and do this sit down chat with Ashley, and I've been texting on my phone with my X and about everything going on back home. And I walk in and I sit down and say, okay, so we're down to three guys and you're in love

with two of them. You know. I'm like, in my mind is vomiting and spinning, you know, it's I I my my brain is in a blender, and I just have to like put a smile on it and go

through these steps because you're like, we're also you. How do you compartmentalize where you're like, what I'm going through is actually real and like you with two people on an island, and like you know, like you, you you probably felt like I have to separate myself and be like I'm actually having real life outside of your problems where you're in your bubble. I wanted to shake, don't do this. Love is fake, it's not real. But anyway, but actually, I mean the good news is if there's

a positive going through all that. It made me so much more empathetic and understanding going through this with you and with other bachelors and bachelorettes of like, I I know what it's like to be heartbroken and go through something crazy and try and find love and how and how tumultuous all that is, all of it is, and so it definitely helped me. But in those moments. It's not an easy gig um but it's but it's it's

a rewarding one when you get to do it. It is it is I just I mean, I know people probably would listen and be like, oh no, you have to have late hours and hot places like it does sound like, but it really is hard work. And I I commend you for all the all those years of doing that, because that's not just I did one season. You were doing Bachelor, Bachelor in Paradise, Bachelorette for twenty years. That's crazy. During my entire adult life, professional adult life,

pretty much, the pasports are full, they are stamped. Let me ask you, how are you? How are you doing? Are you enjoying podcasting? Are you enjoying retired life? That not really retired, but like, are are you? How are you really truly doing? Thank you for asking. Um, I'm really good. I am probably happier than I have ever been, thanks to the beautiful woman sitting next to me, l z Um who I know you know and love as well.

But no, we have. We have carved out a wonderful life and built this life together and obviously moved to Austin closer to my kids at TCU. And you know, when everybody's healthy and when things are rolling in life, it's that's it. It's you know, as as a parent, as whatever, it's if everyone's good and everyone healthy, then I'm good and so we are, and we're in a phenomenal place right now. We're excited about planning a wedding. We are excited about what's to come in our life.

As are you, yes, planning a wedding? Help me with that? Yeah, there's a few of us in a row here what we're Where are you guys? And all this? I know I talked to Jason a lot, but we honestly, believe it or not, don't talk a lot about the wedding. Um, where are you guys in all this? It's we suck, like we just honestly anytime we go to sit down to talk about it, we literally want to do something else. And that sounds so terrible because it should be a priority,

but it doesn't feel like one. And we're both okay with that. Well that's all. That's all that matters. Yeah, I feel like, you know, it's there's so much noise about like, well, why don't you guys talk about the wedding or why is there not a wedding happening? And it's like, I don't need to prove our relationship to you through a wedding, Like that's I don't know, I

just don't. We both literally sat down the other day to maybe go through like start a guest list, and then we're we saw Yasi and like a bottle of wine, and like should we just play yasi and like drink wine instead? And then we that's what we did. And Lauren and I have been there as well, where we it's not the biggest priority in our life. We've both done it before, so you know it's not our first and um, we're not worried about children and all that

in our lives. And so you're in a different place and and so as long as you guys are communicating, as long as you're having you know, you're on the same page, that's all that matters. That's all that matters. Are you happy, are you in love? And are you happy with where you are? Then that's it. I know, why is it so hard for other people to understand that though it's not about them? And I mean, and I know you do. I mean case in point of

this whole thing in this interview you did. It's uh And I know you and I know things become about you and you internalize things, but it's not it's not about everybody else and how they feel. And you know what articles are written about you and Jason it's it's about are you happy and are you in love? And look, you'll get there or guess what if you don't, So you're Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn the rest of your life. Who cares, you know, and you're eternally dating. That's not

such as you know. I just had Michelle money on and I know you know money, you know, and and it's funny we have the same conversation because she and Mike, who I adore, we're just going to be forever partners. Great, whatever, And then it just changed for them all of a sudden, it just changed for them. You know what, No, we do want to get married, great, so then do that. But it's not about pleasing everybody else. It was about this made them feel good. And Elz and I got

to the same places. I really felt the same way. And then I'm like, no, no, no, I don't I don't feel that way. I want to get down one knee. I want to propose to this woman. I want to change I want to change this and take it to a different place. And we did and then that felt and that felt right, and then the next step will feel right. So that's so that's okay. Just go at your own speed in as long as you guys are happy, that's all anyone should care about. Thank you for that.

I needed that. See, this is what I need in my life, the Chris Harrison advice. I appreciate that. And you know I love you and Jason and that will never change. And then, if anybody takes anything away from this show, I want everyone to know that in no way was I upset by that interview. I wanted to clear some things up, yes, and but in no way was upset and I was in no way upset that you and Tasha were hosting the show, and I love

you both. I'm glad everybody got to kind of watch this and share share you and I going through a real life moment. Yes, I agree with you when you said back at the start of the podcast that I'm actually not. Of course, I wish I would have connected with you, but I'm glad we didn't until this moment because I love authentic conversations that are real, and we probably would have just gotten into this on the phone. So it's nice to have like the real chat on

the podcast. But I will say, people want to hear from you, and it's cool because we've seen you as Chris Harrison the host for so long, um, but we don't actually get to know you as a human being. And a podcast gives you that opportunity to be a

real human being. And I think that's awesome for you. Well, And what I what I love is that I get to do for everybody what I did for you and what I did for all the bachelors and bacherettes for so many years, where I get to kind of dive into the life and listen and try and help journalism one oh one. Don't ever talk to a guest before you interview them, And although we tried to break that rule,

we didn't. And and as far as genuine conversations go, I hope everybody's enjoyed this one, because this has been very genuine. This was Caitlin and I talking for the first time in quite some time, and I'm so glad we did. You are a dear friend. I love you, I love Jason, and I appreciate you coming on and talking in this manner because I'm sure this is a little trepidacious for you. I'm sure you were a little worried of like, oh God, how is this going to go.

I was like, I've done this before. He's good, he's really good. I don't know what he's going to get out of me. No, you're amazing. You're meant to be doing this. This is you know, Like you said, the time is right and it's nice for you to have a voice. And I'm really excited for you to be in the podcasting family. There's room for all of us. There is room for all of us. And as I said at the wedding, I'm always here for you. Oh I love you. Thank you for having me on and

for having this conversation with me. I can now sleep at night. Good. You can go on to the next thing you can be nuts about. Thank god, Caitlin Bristow. Thank you for your time, thank you for joining me, and I will see you very soon, next time with a beautiful bottle of wine. Yes, that's now. I'm gonna make you come online and then I'm going to feed us wine again, because remember my golden rule of life, life is too short drink good wine to drink crappy wine.

Oh yeah, yeah, life for her to drink rappy wine. You do say that. That's that's why I came up with my own line, because then I'm like, I just get it for free all the time. That's even better. Or I guess the new line is the best wine is free wine. All right, Caitlin, thank you again and I will talk to you Sarah. You've learned a big hug for me. I will do it by again. My thanks to Caitlin for joining me. And she didn't have

to do this. We could have just talked on the phone, aired out our dirty laundry together and work through this, but she chose to come on here to let everybody share in this, and I really appreciate that and hopefully it helped. Hopefully it was cathartic, not just for Caitlin and I but for everybody just to see how we

work this out. And I have nothing but love for Caitlin, for Jason, and I am excited to hear whatever their relationship turns into, whether it's a marriage or a forever partnership, it doesn't matter. All that matters in life. Are you happy? Are you treating others well? Are you taking care of those around you? Are you a good citizen? Just worry about that. The rest we'll take care of itself, take care of each other. Thanks for listening today, and I will talk to you next time because we have a

lot more to talk about. Thanks for listening. Follow us on Instagram at the most Dramatic pod ever, and make sure to write us a review and leave us five stars. I'll talk to you next time.