This is the most dramatic podcast ever and iHeartRadio podcast. Chris Harrison and Lauren Zema coming to you from the home office in Austin, Texas. It's good to be home. We are zeroing in on our wedding day, LZ. And that is what is going to take us to open up the playbook today, not just to talk about our wedding, but something very interesting came up. Somebody reached out to us via the most Dramatic pod Instagram, left us say a DM and asked this very important question and really
made a good point. And it's about getting gifts at your wedding when it's not your first wedding. Should this still be a thing? I think this came to us because I think it's well known you and I have had weddings before. We're about to do number two together, and obviously we are older, we are successful, We've had our success, we have our house, we have our things. How do you feel about it?
Well, yeah, let's share what we're doing.
Which and we were both completely on the same page right from the start. As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I said to Chris, no, I don't want to ask for any gifts at the wedding and you right away we're like, yes, I was thinking the same thing. So we are just we listed a couple of our favorite charities.
And we do not expect anybody to give to those.
But if you would be the person, because you know, sometimes even if you don't have a registry, your friends still yeah feel like they should give you a gift, and so then they get you something. No, like I don't want that if you were going to put your money towards anything, if you feel like you have to please do a donation instead.
Yeah, I think a lot of Lauren's friends should get her like a lot of kitchen stuff, a lot of cooking like croc pot.
Gift certificate for golf lessons.
No, so we are no, it is our thing, is we We immediately said we do not want gifts. We just want people to come celebrate and be with us and don't think about the gift thing because it is you know, you're like, what do we get and we're not going to register anywhere. So we thought the charity thing would be a good idea if you want to give to one of our favorite charities.
But I'll take it.
A step further us aside level of success aside. I don't think you should ask people for a gift if it's your second one either. I think you've already done it once and you can't be doing it again. There is a whole episode of Sex in the City about how Carrie she goes to her friend's house for a party. The friend asked everybody to take their shoes off at the door, and you remember, Carrie Bradshaw has very expensive shoes,
shoes that cost hundreds of dollars. Somebody another party gifts and she doesn't know who takes her shoes, and so she says to her friend whose house it was, Hey, I kind of think you should replace my shoes. And the friend thinks that's ridiculous and says, well, Carrie, I wasn't my choice for you to buy these expensive shoes. And Carrie then adds up how much she spent on getting this friend baby shower gifts for every baby wedding gifts, and Carrie's like, wait a minute, I've never been married
and I've never had kids. Where's my equivalent of baby shites and wedding gifts? Can't you at least replace my shoes that were stolen at your house. And it's such a good point because we celebrate certain things, right, I said to my mom once, you know, Mom, I should I throw a party for myself that I got a new job, and people should people get me gifts for that? It's not really fair. So all that being said, I certainly do not think we should be asking people to give us gifts for a second wedding.
I think there is out of necessity. And that's where this came from. The whole tradition of it is.
It used to be it was like we're helping you start your life.
Well, you're getting married. Especially used to get married much younger, like that was a thing, you know, back when this whole tradition started, and you're starting your life. And honestly, it helps when I first got married, and probably it did for you as well, because you get your pots and pans and you get your dishes and that you're starting your life and that's it's a fun thing and you're registering. But as you're older, you got your pots and pans and your bowls and your cups and all
that stuff. So yeah, I agree, first one fine, second one, no, across the board.
People register for some weird stuff too.
Yeah.
When one of my friends and grants, we were like twenty three, she got married right out of college. It was like she just registered for not I mean, she registered for toiletries. I remember on her registry there were like razors and like chlorox, and I'm like, babe, register for a mixture. You know, I'm just doing your grocery shopping.
Cornnuts and I need some milk or low on eggs.
Yeah, if you get on your way to the wedding, stop and get some ice, that would be great.
It's always ice, It's always ice.
I don't think you should have gifts the second time around. And I also think if you're going to ask people to give you gifts for a wedding, I think you have to factor in how much is your wedding costing someone?
Right?
I do think I kind of traveling well yeah, I mean, which is hard because maybe if it's your wedding, you're arguing, well, I'm giving them a great party in Italy and if they don't want to come, they don't have to come. But I am a believer in the your presence is my present thing, Like I expect I'm going to throw people a great party because I know they traveled, and yeah, so for sure, on a second time around, I don't
think you need the gifts on top of it. But I also no matter when I was getting married, I would feel bad if people were like out.
Money for my wedding.
Yeah, yeah, no, we feel the same about this, and I think that is the right call. So it is said, So it is done, no gifts for second wedding, and you could just say, just if you show up at the wedding, you can just say. L Z and H told me that is indeed the case. As we wrap up this playbook, Wow, you know, l Z, I'm not sure what we do now. You know we're empty nesters. We were back, we're back in it with the kids at school. They're both up at college. I guess we
got to go figure out. We go see Barbie and Oppenheimer again. I don't know, we need some more three hour move. But again, for all those parents that are in the same boat, good luck to you and God bless on a healthy, happy, successful school year ahead. And I know it's hard to believe it's even the school
year now, because it's well not even September yet. Was it just me or did we always start later in September or is that just the old man and me going you know, I walked uphill both ways to school in the snow. I don't know, but anyway, school year started. Wish everybody the best, and I wish you the best, And thank you so much for tuning in. We love a chance to sit down and talk with you, and we'll do it again because we have so much more
to talk about. Thanks for listening. Follow us on Instagram at the most dramatic pod ever and make sure to write us a review and leave us five stars. I'll talk to you next time.