Do you want to date a celebrity?

This is the most dramatic podcast ever and iHeartRadio podcast. Chris Harrison and Lauren Zema comming to you from the home office in Austin, Texas, where we wanted to dive into a very interesting topic today. There was an article written about this woman that had dated a celebrity and she kind of went into the pros and cons, the

Well.

I was going to say, that's what's so funny that you're like, when did to chase the people down? I'm like, I'm right in front of you, man, when I dated you, you were a little famous. You know it might still be so yeah, I went through that myself, But who did you chase down? The book for today.

Coming up our good friend Evanna Firestone, who obviously fell in love with dated, then married and had children with Andrew Firestone.

One of the best bachelor's ever, one of the.

Best bachelors ever. Great man obviously comes from a very famous family and was a popular figure when they But the thing about Evanna, it's not just about Andrew. There are other famous people life.

Because she was a model and an actress herself.

Exactly, So there was a life before Andrew. So she is going to give a great perspective. And then someone that I just want to embarrass and really out on this program is Ben Higgins. So his wife Jessica Clark is coming on.

So what was the story of the article? Does she reveal who the celebrity was?

First of all, no, And that was part of reading the article was like, Okay, who is this? Who is this? So she never reveals who the celebrity is. Seems like a very big celebrity. But he happened to be in her town working. She slid into the DMS, he reached back out quickly. She was very proactive about trying to move it out of DMS and meet for coffee. The coffee led to a date they spent an amazing evening together. It sounds like it didn't get very romantic or sexual,

Well, okay, I'm gonna come in with a little bit of skepticism. I think it's pretty easy to have a good first date. Here's why. I think, if you're a person who can carry on a conversation, a first date is just like you know, it's the best an interview, right, the best of us. Yeah, it's an interview for a job.

You don't get his perspective clearly true. And what I find interesting is, you're right, this guy is alone on the road. He's lonely. Clearly.

I think it's semed like he was a stand up comedian. Because she went I think, to his to a show.

You're right and what I you know, And of course she saw the adulation and she sat there on the front row of this performance and then they went out, so obviously a charismatic, funny comedian and spent time with him. Would there have been more? Would this person have wanted more? He was just on the road. He's moving to the laugh factory where the chuckle.

Hut's really going to have to put in the effort.

Yes, is he going to come back to Wisconsin or wherever you are to date again? Or we all just took it as this one great night and is that really dating a celebrity?

Well, there's another two things in my takeaway here. One, I like that she DMed and I do think if you're a celebrity, look, even if you might come across someone on Instagram who you're interested in, you can't be dming everybody you come across weird, you come across creepy. Then people start telling that story, Oh he dms all these people or she does, so she reached out. I think that was a solid safe thing to do. And

Gosh, but it wouldn't take a lot for a journalist to track this down, probably knowing you could find out where she lives, because this woman works in kind of inn entertainment in a way. She was a publicist, Yeah, publicist, so it wouldn't be hard to figure this out.

Probably, So this is a big risk for celebrities in the social media era. I think about not too long ago, a few months ago, Matthew Perry, somebody was messaging with him on the dating app Riah, which is supposed to be this elite dating app private for people.

The velvet rope is up and.

You're not supposed to do this. It's part of the rules of the app. But what real power does the app have to tell people not to. The woman like screenshot and screen recorded a FaceTime session they had and posted it on the internet and said, oh, I had this really weird FaceTime date with Matthew Perry Chandler from friends, and I felt so bad for him and luckily publicly. People in the comments said, this is not cool that you did this. I think she was trying to get clout,

I felt the same thing after Jonah Hill, the guy just had a baby with somebody else and an ex girlfriend then goes public with all his insecurities and stuff from Instagram and his messages. No, like, it's just I hate that.

So there's so many sides to get into on all of it. But let's turn the tables on you. Because I'm in my head, I'm thinking about a lot from our relationship actually, Like for example, I did DM you, like we had kind of had a flirty conversation, but I actually made sure to DM you because I thought, you know, I don't know if a I'm a big open the door and if somebody walks through, then that's great, and if not, just keep going down the hallway. You

For sure? Yeah, insecurity and especially I think the added pressure of you're hosting the biggest dating show in the world.

What was that added pressure people would judge your data.

Yeah, I'm just like, Okay, this guy is now looking for love. The jokes kind of right themselves. It's kind of like when I got divorced. The late night shows had you know, a heyday for a couple of days of the jokes of oh, the guy who is all about love and creating love and finding love is divorced, so sucks it love. Yeah, there is this added pressure of when you go on a date and you have a little bit of fame and you have a little bit of money and you definitely are doing a show

Did you ever have people sign NDA's you never have?

No, No, God, No, some people do. I know some people do. And by the way I understand it, it's it sounds so weird and if that stuff gets out, you're like, what a weirdo? But or people I know other big celebrity and I'm talking big celebrities on different

Proof right And by the way, an NDA is a non disclosure agreement. If anyone doesn't know means you'd sign it and you'd promise that you're not going to go tell stories about people and all that.

How unromantic to have to do that, and it sucks that people have to think like that, But I get it. I get how you have to think like that because you worry about stories, even on a much lesser scale, the story. You know, there's websites that are who's who's a good tipper, who's not a good tipper at a restaurant? So people do love a good story.

And I well, okay, so I'm going back to you dating now. So you start dating? Did how did you meet people in the beginning? And were you worried that people would obviously want to date you just because just to have that.

Story, I felt like I had to be very careful. And I'm also very pretty conservative in my life. Like obviously what I do is out loud and it's in front of millions of people publicly, but my private life, I really enjoyed, Like when I was married, nobody cares because it's not sexy at all when you're married and have kids. When you're single, people are going to take pictures, follow and all that stuff. So I all of a sudden was living this different life and I realized there

Did you go on any dates where someone obviously had just gone on the date with you because you were the host of The Bachelor?

No, but I got well, I don't know, because that's the other thing. The other thing is you don't know I went on you know. So how I ended up meeting people was through friends, and I was I started being better about just getting out, like I'll go on a trip with friends and I'm just to go out and talk to people. Because the great thing about the show is it's that icebreaker. People will it's a conversation starter,

Oh that's a red flag. Well but okay, hold on, let me ask you. That is my red flag. Always in any relationship, whether it's friendship, work, romantic, if somebody doesn't ask me one question back, I'm like, well, this isn't a two way street. I'm exhausted, I'm drained, man, I can't keep hopping you up and you're not giving me anything in return.

And it wasn't even the depth.

But do you think that's them? Is there something where people don't ask you any questions back because they don't want you to.

They're worried you're.

Going to think, okay, listen, idiot, you don't know what I do for a living. But also do you want it to be normal? And someone say, hey, so what do you do?

Here's what I So. What this person did was they took the tact of I'm not going to ask any questions about what you do. And that's weird to me. If I'm on a date and I'm going to just sit sit in the woman's side of the chair, aren't you interested in what this guy does? What do you do for a living? What do you do every day? Your hot? Whatever? Like? She never asked one question about my life, So I thought, okay, that's odd. Wouldn't you want to know that on a date. Then after we ate,

Without it being well, tell me, okay, so tell me the truth about last season and that kind of.

Thing, right exactly to get to know the person, which is what I would want to do on a date. Anyway.

Do you remember much about the conversation on our first date? Did I ask? I don't remember this stuff? I asked you?

You just hammered me. It was like a job interview. You went full Barbara Walters. And we sat there at the SOHO House in Malibu and I just answered questions for like an hour and a half, and then you had the goal to later say you talk too much about yourself on that first day fly.

You didn't ask me back about myself? No, but do you remember what I what kind of stuff I asked you about.

It was pretty basic because you and I, although you would talk to me. The funny thing about us, so the interesting thing was we didn't talk much about the business because you and I had already maybe the thing our professional relationship had covered business stuff. You knew about The Bachelor and the people on it, so I knew you knew all that, so we could just talk about family,

Which probably speaks to what a private life you lived. Because I didn't feel like I, as much as i'd been interviewing you for three years, I didn't feel like I knew very much about your personal life.

I was careful about trying to control that even when you and I dated. We dated for six months before we went public, because we knew that would be a thing. Again, that's just one little step, but it's not a huge thing. But it's just one little thing that you and I wanted to think about before we went public because I knew it would affect you and your business.

Well, it's interesting as much as we're saying somebody could photography or whatever, I was worried when we started dating. I didn't want yeah you're I didn't want dating you to affect my career, and it was kind of this difficult thing of I knew it would, and so I really knew that I wanted it to be serious before we became public with it. But I was always pretty on edge that someone would take a picture of us

Yeah, I remember, that's the only one. I remember too.

And they all obviously know me because I'd been interviewing them and I know them. And I looked up and I saw her, and so quickly my brain went, there's no way to explain why I'm here, and so I ran out of the room into a closet and for the for like the next hour of the party, I was in the closet and our friend Alyssa brought me some snacks. She's like, what are you doing here? But

And by the way. She didn't do anything. They just showed up at a party where I remember, and I had to find you in the closet. I'm like, oh god, this is still pretty early days. And I'm like, is she mad at me? What did I do? And You're like, no, I just didn't want this to come out because obviously with that information just slipping out, Yeah, that's not how

I totally agree.

Full disclosure, Lauren LZ and I are dear friends with the Firestones. Love you guys, and so I appreciate you doing this, and it's kind of a weird topic, but I felt like, if I'm going to talk about dating a celebrity and really have someone speak the truth, I need someone I know really well and somebody whose history I know a little bit too. And so that's why

I in fact do, But that being said, it was an industry that I was in It wasn't something that I was seeking out, you know, to date, it's just so happened. You know, you're kind of dating people that are in your industry, are around, So it wasn't you know, that big of a deal back in the day. And a couple of these people, they weren't such a big deal back then. Right now, it's a different story.

Oh, good point. I guess I didn't think about that. I guess really neither one of them was a huge deal. They both wanted to be, but they weren't. Y'all were all kind of aspiring at the same time.

Exactly.

That's a good point and probably an important thing of when you come up together and you are on equal footing, it probably makes it a little easier.

Absolutely, And I wouldn't say that it was equal footing back in that day. I was definitely trying and you know, working and trying my hardest to succeed.

What were the pitfalls that you ran into in dating celebrities and not even getting into the andrew of it all yet, but just what were some of the things you thought, oh, this is kind of a pain in the butt.

Well, I think that if you're dating someone that is so driven, and I put you in this category. I mean, you've worked hard your entire career. If somebody is that driven, they're only going to have a certain amount of time to dedicate to you. And that doesn't necessarily mean that they don't like you or you're not you know, good enough or whatever. Their number one is their career interesting.

That's very ith and that goes for not just celebrities like little, just everybody in general. If you are dating a very high functioning individual man or woman, you're not always going to be top of the list.

No, absolutely not. And I if you can understand that it's not you because I know, I know for a fact, like I'm very comfortable in my own skin, but this person is crazy driven. So you just have to realize what you want out of a relationship. The time sped together was so crazy fun, yeah, but then gone.

You know, well, I guess it's interesting too, especially when you're at that level, when you're in the grind mode. Maybe if you got them to that a list level and you were dating them, then it may have been there may have been other pitfalls, but at least you have control of your schedule and your calendar. When you were in that grind mode and you were trying to really make that next big step to that elite level.

So, I mean, you get to go to cool events. Dates are very very curated. You know, they'll they have someone that can plan that for you, right like you know, it's fun and exciting, and you're always in the fun part that you know, whatever's happening, you're invited to the type of thing.

The velvet rope is always coming down, you always get the parking spot. You always get in the club, you always get the table service, you get in the good restaurant, you get the reservation, you get the show tickets. Yeah, a lot of those hurdles come down quickly, and that's a nice that's a nice ride, and it makes that person. Well, I'll ask you, does it make the person you're dating a little bit more attractive?

Absolutely? I mean for me, that's interesting, Like I want to be with someone that is desired, you know, that's just what it is, right, Like, that's exciting, so of course, but then you have the other stuff and you just need to see what works for you.

When you and Andrew came to be, and it was after he did The Bachelor, did you know anything about him? Did you know he was former Bachelor and all that?

Quite honestly, No, I did know his face. I think i'd seen him on like a tabloid magazine or something like that in the grocery store. I hadn't invested much time in knowing who he was exactly. At that time. I was doing a series and I was gone while his show was airing. I was gone, So but I did recognize his face because I follow pop culture and stuff like that. I remember seeing him at a party once but never talking to him.

Oh before, Oh yeah, because he told me the story and I'm not talking out of school that Andrew chased you and became absolutely obsessed with you. The night we shot it was either the tell all. Yeah, it was the tell all for Jen Chef's season. He had a couple hours to kill before he went to the airport, went to a bar or a party or something, and met you, fell head over heels in love with you that moment, as Andrew tends to do, and then annoyingly, this is back in the day when you had to

So it wasn't that out of the ordinary, right, just being in LA and doing all that. What Andrew did well was always make me feel no matter what, that I was important and all those things that need to happen to make a person feel secure. Right, So it doesn't matter who's coming up and the attention that he's giving back because he's a good person and all those things. But once you know that this person's got you, you're fine.

Yeah.

And now how it's kind of attractive too, right, Like you know, other girls think he's cute. Oh great, but I'm the one, right, I know.

I'm going home with him. That is a huge You just said something so well there. That is important in every relationship. And guys, I can't tell you this enough, and ladies as well, but prioritize your person, make them feel special in every instance, whether you're at a party, whether you are walking into a movie whatever, when you're in that crowd of people, for that person to know just that reassuring hand on the show, whatever it is, that is a huge thing. It really is, and it's

Yeah, And I think when it's right, it's right. And when you want to give someone that sort of attention, you know, just to make and he could talk to anyone in the room. I don't care, right, but as long as I know we're have fun.

Elsie and I have this great thing where I always say I could just look at her across the room and you just you give him that look and she'll give you that smile and you just know. And that's just that's all you need. That's all you need to have that connection with Andrew. You know, he had this thing about him. He was the first bachelor that paid for his own ring. He paid, he didn't take any money. Probably dumb of him to do that. If he go back, I would have told him at least take some money.

Absolutely?

The other was like a week ago and I was in Santa Barbara with you guys and we were at this place and Andrews sent your kids to go get me a hat from this place we were at, and he just because he's that kind of guy, He's like, oh, we had a good day today, Hey go get mister Harrison a hat. And your kids sprinted off and like got me a hat. And I'm like, it's such an Andrew thing to do. But he is the consummate gentleman.

He absolutely is. But yeah, he you know, hard work, he wants to earn things, and yeah, he won't take a freebee.

One of the things I think is always important about bachelor couples, and I know you guys weren't a bachelor couple, but I think this goes for every couple. Once you realize you're established, you're dating, you're married because getting away and living your life. You guys moved off to Santa Barbara. You have a very quiet, pretty private life. I know you know Andrew's hosting events, you are charing events. So

Huge, absolutely, But I think with the whole Firestone name, people have ideas of what our life might be, and I mean, you know it's Instagram life versus reality, right always, yeah, and how you pitch things, and we're just not those people. My husband's a very hard working man that's going to go you know, earnest keep and that whole thing. So it's funny. Yes we are private, but we're not at all what people think we are flashy or you know.

You bring up an interesting question and something I've actually never really talked to you guys about. What would you say carries more weight? And when I say weight, I mean something you probably feel like you have to live up to or deal with more? Is it Bachelor Nation World or having a Firestone name?

Hands down, the Firestone name. Yeah, I think that is a hard thing to live up to. Absolutely.

I mean it's something we definitely leaned into on the show. I mean his family goes back to American Royalty and Harvey Firestone and so it's something that I know he's dealt with his whole life. And then when you come in you have to be a part of It's, you know a little bit like marrying into the royal family. A royal name here in America was something that now you have to carry on.

There's a lot of pressure on all those kids to be successful, to be good humans, all the things.

You're right, His dad, Brooks Firestone set that standard, that entrepreneurial spirit of you will go out and grind, you will find your way, and like his brother with the brewery, and Andrew has done amazingly well with his business and real estate, and so I am so proud to see those guys. And they could have easily rested on their laurels. None of them did. Somehow his mom and dad were able to put that fire in his belly and with all the kids, that is a huge attribute. I'm sure a turn on for you.

Absolutely absolutely, That's what I fell in love.

With, right, It's what we all fell in love with, and it's why we fell in love with you, Yvonna. Thank you for.

Joining me, Thank you so much for having me.

When I thought about doing this show, this episode on this topic dating celebrities, there was one person I had to reach out to, and that is jess Clark. That is Ben Higgins's wife. And everybody knows I'm good friends with Ben. Everybody knows I love and adore him, but he's also a mess, and so anytime I get a chance to also take shots at Ben, I'm all in. And so I brought in my secret weapon, Jessica Clark, to talk about this. But I also, honestly, first of all,

Of course, anytime, like I said anything for you, but I.

Really wanted to talk to you because we have been in public together as a group and there are two people, two bachelors, and so I had have on a firestone on right before you. And Andrew is like, is this type of person? And Ben so much so that I actually wanted to introduce Ben and Andrew together, and we did. We got together and played golf. They are very similar people. They're very similar bachelors and that they are ridiculously beloved

I you know, I think the only problem I've ever found with it is when we first started dating, because I was so unfamiliar with Bachelor Nation that I didn't realize what I was getting myself into.

Because he slid into your DMS.

He did.

He probably saw some hot track picture just by the way an insane athlete ran track in college. He slid into your DMS. What were your thoughts when you got this guy with a blue check mark just slid into my DMS.

Yeah, well, first I have to say he slid into my DMS after seeing a photo of me and my dad. So my biggest joke is did he want to marry me or did he want my dad as a father in law? That very still out because they love each other. But when he slid in, I saw the blue Chick check mark, and obviously he has like a million plus followers, and I was like, what in the world who is

So he stumbled across this picture he DMS you, and where does it go from there? And how quickly?

So we DM back and forth and there's this immediate connection, which I can't really explain because it's over kind of text message and it's like, how can you connect with someone?

But it was just easy banter.

Then he pulled the old like never check my dms, give me your number, So I did.

Smart boy. I like that get it off DMS as fast as.

You can, exactly exactly. So we're texting back and forth and this is the most been thing ever.

But he had listened to a talk on generosity and he wants to know my thoughts on if it was more generous to give with time or money.

And at that point, I was making.

Less than minimum wage and I was completely broke, and I didn't want to come off as selfish, so I sent him a voice memo and kind of explained myself of why it was really hard for me to give with money at the time, and he immediately called me. We talked for like thirty minutes, and then when he hung up, he was like, well, well, if anything, I got a great friend out of this. And I was like, well, I'm never hearing it from this guy again, Like I

That's amazing, And the rest is yea now history, as y'all bet married and living this wonderful life together. So one of the things is I said about Andrew Firestone and Ben Higgins. I had a woman the other day come up to me and she stops me. We're at the gym, and she's like, oh my god, Chris, I have to tell you. And first of all, I don't know this woman either, but all of a sudden, she just acted like we knew each other. I have to

I think the strangers or the you know, the people that watch the show and come up and talk to Ben, that's never bothered me as much as when I've seen scenes of the show that bothers me more interesting, just because like, you know that the people you've dated in the past have exes and stuff like that. They can tell you all about it, but you don't have to see the way that they've looked at them, because like the way they've looked at them is the way they look.

At you, you know what I mean.

Yeah, So, like the scenes of the show have bothered me more than people coming up and thinking they know Ben, because like you said, with Ben, it's what you see is what you get, and so it's more like almost a reassurance that I'm just dating the most pure and kind and just true person or I'm married to now. But yeah, it's I think it's more of like that that's such a respect thing for him, and it means so much to him because he was the Bachelor so

So it's slow.

Yeah, yeah, so I was really eased into that. But no, it's it's more the scenes from the show that.

Did you watch, Like did you go back and watch the season? And you know he did Bachelor, He was on Bachelor Winter Games, and so did you go back and watch these and if so, like, did you stop.

I've never intentionally watched it. It's more been like if we've been watching the show and there's been a preview or flashback, or one time we were doing a podcast together and we were watching like an upcoming Bachelor thing and there was a flashback of him and like his finale. Yeah, and it was him in his final two and.

That like crushed me.

Wow. Yeah, And that was early on in dating too, But so I've tried to stay away from many of it.

Yeah, well, especially early on, there's more insecurities. You still wonder things, and until you really know the person, I can imagine that would be difficult. That is very interesting, especially his season was so big and it still gets you know, even though it was a long time ago, you still see those I guess you'd call them highlights. But you're right. I would not want to go back and watch LZ on a date and saying I love

Yeah, it's it is really disconcerting because you don't think about it till you're in the situation. But I mean, I've dated other people too, and I can tell Ben all about it, but he's never seen me interact with them, or kiss them or look at them deeply in the eye.

You can make of that what we want in our own minds exactly. That was Jessica didn't enjoy it. She wasn't into it, no.

Eye contact.

She hated it.

She was always pining after me and always thinking about that. That's funny as you move on with your life and you guys got married. And I said this to Ivanna, and it's one consistent thing that I've seen with most successful couples from the show, and that is you went off and lived your life. You guys met outside of Hollywood. You live outside of Hollywood very much. You guys are in Denver, you're in Indiana. So you lived this very

Yep, he actually decided not to move to la and to do with that whole thing because of something that you said to him. I don't even know if you remember saying this. He talks about it all the time. But when he was the bachelor, you pulled him aside and you were like, make sure that this experience enhance it your life and doesn't change your life. And I think he's done a really good job of that and pursued these things outside of the Bachelor and then has

Yeah. I saw this very kind of vulnerable guy in Ben as he came off the show. And these people that watch the show of viewers and I understand, you're like, oh, he signed up for this. It's like they know what they're getting into. They don't. There's no way you understand. You're being shot out of a cannon without a net and you're going one thousand miles an hour and it is so new. The love, adoration, that you get, especially when you're someone like Ben, and so I just saw

Well, we love you. We're really grateful for you, and we wouldn't be where we are without you. So thank you for inviting me.

Jessica, I thank you so much. I'll talk to you guys soon.

Okay, talk to you soon.

It is impossible not to love and adore Jessica and Ben, and my thanks to her for coming on. Jessica Clark an amazing woman, and Evana Firestone, Andrew's wife as well. I appreciate their honesty and insight, and just both of them very good friends of ours as well, and I always appreciate their love and friendship and support and yours as well. Truly love doing this show, talking to you guys each and every week, several fun episodes and by the way, I want to tell you so, Lauren and