Hello, welcome to another episode gonna dive straight in today with just saying the biggest Thank you. For those of you who are on my Instagram, you might have seen that I did a little celebration post about this podcast, I still can't quite believe like, I can't believe it, of course, because it's been my intention, but it still just floats my boat, like to know that it's helping people, and it's resonating with people and
you're loving the guests. And we recently hit 100,000 downloads, which is so exciting and man's. And I actually have some huge exciting visions and plans for what to bring to the podcast this year, and hopefully, some really incredible and big guests for you. And so it's just, it's just so incredible. And I want to say thank you. And I'm also I am doing a giveaway for a listener, which is also exciting to me, I can't wait to draw it.
And I'm going to be doing a free one on one coaching session along with another free added extra week of WhatsApp voice and tech support to really like quantum leap your energy to see what things are getting in the way to get you into a really good energy give you a straight and aligned, personalised strategy, whatever it is, I'm going to give that in two weeks
time online. And so to get yourself into the draw for that, all you need to do is leave a review on wherever you listen to this podcast, leave a review, take a screenshot, send it to me in the DMS on Instagram, if you don't have Instagram, you can email it, and you'll go in the draw to win that. And I'm really, really, really excited
about it. And this just really again, like helps us to grow it to get you know, more listeners to help with reach and impact and then get even more incredible guests for you guys. Like it's just, it's such a good energy exchange. So if you would fit if you feel cold, if you would like to, that's one way that you can go into the draw to, to win this time, and it's gonna be so fun to get to know you and to and to help you grow
this year. So something I want to talk about because I actually had a listener reach out and ask, like, request that I do an episode about this. And I was like, fuck yeah, I've got a lot to say about this. And it was about balance. And this is very interest, like my opinion on balance. And it is just that it's an opinion. So take it with a critical grain of salt. And just see what you think I'd love to know what you think. My
thoughts on balance. And I'm going to, I'm going to just give a big caveat, before I dive into this, and I'm gonna say this is completely context dependent dependent, it depends on context. Obviously, by reading the title of today's show, you'll see, you'll read that I said, why I think balance is bullshit. And what I choose to aim for instead, I the context, where I believe balances bullshit, is when you have some really big goals that you're
working towards. And when you're in a phase of growth, when you're in a phase of like, this is my intention, this is where my energy is going. This is the real big like, these are the moves I'm making this year, or this is where I really want to direct and invest all my attention and focus. When you're in that phase, there is no
balance right? Or another context where this will probably be more accurate is if you are trying to get to a level of mastery, you want to be the best you want to be the best at something you want to you want to like, let's say for example, you were gonna become a number one peak performance athlete, you wanted to get to the Olympics, there's no fucking balance in your life, let me put it that way. Like, you don't get to be the elite, you don't get to be the top of the game peak
performance. With this balance, it's just not there has to be something out of balance. So in these contexts, balance won't
exist, it just won't. However, that's not to say that I don't intentionally go out of those seasons, and choose to be in a season of, you know, what, I've just done a lot of growth, I've done a lot of things that have created some disharmony is that like, I've created a phase in my life intentionally, where the balance was a little bit off whack with intention, I'm coming out of that phase, and I'm spending a little bit of time in more like a reaping what I sowed phase,
and that might be a lot more a lot more balanced. It probably will be and I've had those phases where there is more balance, however, and this is where I'm like, get real with yourself, get intentional with yourself, what is the season you are in. We've just had a time of reflection and intention setting and all of that. If you did your intention setting around New Year's and you created these like hefty goals, and they might
be these crazy goals. Like for example, I am going into a year of growth and it is big growth. Like I'm going into a year where I'm writing a book, I'm launching products, I'm launching a school I'm doing all these certifications, I'm building new courses, there is not going to be as much balance and what that means is that some things won't will go because it's an energy, it's a choice. So let's just think of it like
this. Our energy is a finite resource and there's only so much To give, there's only 24 hours in the day, we only have a certain amount of hours and energy to give. And if you want to tip your balance your energy, your focus into one particular bucket, it's going to not have enough, it's going to impact the other buckets, right? It's like a cake, a cake. If you take a big slice today, there's just not going to be as much tomorrow. And it's the same without energy is the same with
what we're doing. When we're putting extra energy somewhere else, it has to come from somewhere else. But if you do it with intention, then that's awesome. Because it's like, you know what this phase for example, like I always talk about the first year in my business, when I was really building I was in this like wall, there's so much to learn, there's so much to just execute, there's so much going on to build a business. The first thing that I noticed go was my
my exercise regime. And I was very like, when I was in, when I was in when I was a teacher I was like, full. And I'm not like I still always am, I still always am, I'm gonna get to in a moment how I make sure that there's always bare minimums, I have energy, I have standards that I will not like drop no matter what season I'm in. And that still gives me at least a minimum accepted balance level,
which I'll talk about. But like I was like my really before business, like I was just like, I always my goals were very much around like fitness and exercise and lifts and I wanted to like get to a certain lift, like I wanted my deadlift to get to a certain amount of one of my squat to get to a certain amount I wanted my I wanted to be able to run five K's every single week without even breaking a sweat sort of thing. Like, there was a lot of intention and goals
around exercise. And it's not to say that when I started a business, I just stopped exercising, because I had an identity level, I would just never do that I just would never do it. It's deep in my identity. And so there's definitely going to be phases where like some
things will go. So when I was in the first year of business growing my business, I didn't have those huge, I didn't have the energy, nor did I have the desire to be also spending like two hours at the gym, doing my stretches, getting ready for my lifts, doing my meal prep properly, like something had to give. And I was okay with that. Because it was an intentional
choice, right. So that's an example of where there's a season of growth where something's had to give, because I'm spending my time learning like, I'm like really getting into like the business stuff, something had to give and that was okay. It also meant maybe my social life for a little while there was like, Well, no, I'm not going to go out drinking and partying because it impacts my energy, my vitality, I don't want to feel shit, the next day I want to be on my brain needs
to be clear. And there was probably a little bit less of the balance across all the areas of my life with intention. That's not to say that there's not levels or phases and seasons, where I'm like, Okay, I've just gone into this massive growth season I've seen like, I'm now in that, you know, reaping what I've sowed energy, I'm taking a step back a little
bit. That doesn't mean there's not periods where there's a bit more balanced, where maybe like, okay, things are just kind of grooving over, they're pretty automated, that's fine, I'm going to start going out and catching up with friends a little more, maybe I'm going to do a little bit more of the gym.
And then because humans are humans, we might have a new, you know, inspiration, a bit new growth a bit more, a bit more of a goal come in or a bit, just just have a hustle, period, maybe or maybe it's just like, it could be a different phase. Like literally, there's a lot of my clients are like, it's just I'm in the season of motherhood. And my balance is a little bit
off kilter. But unless we've got the intention and the awareness of the season that we're in, we can sometimes just make ourselves feel bad, and make ourselves feel ashamed that we're not able to do all of it. Like we've been sold this thing that you should be able to be fit and healthy seeing all your friends being in a fantastic mother building a business doing it all. And then if you're not,
you're the problem. It's like no, no, no, we only have so much energy to give and we just need to be really kind to ourselves and honest about where we're at. So knowing the season I'm in I can be intentional about what's going to go where my energy is going to be focused and what that means for other areas of my life. And that means I can be a communicating that with people so there's no fallout and be not beating myself up. If I go on. No, my fitness is all like, Oh
my God. Like for example, there was at the end of that year in business, I was like gee whiz, I used to squat way more than this. And now I can't I'm not going to make it mean anything. I'm not going to make myself feel bad. This was intentional. It's all good. Maybe in this you know, I'm in my second year of business and this actually happened in my second year of
business. I did go into that like I'm going to just lean back a little bit and enjoy this because what's the point if we don't enjoy it, enjoy it and my next intention and like intentional season was travel like I the borders were closed for so long. I was like oh god itching to get on a plane travel and freedom and it SPIRATION is just so big for me. So in the second year of business, I was very much intentionally going
travelling. And again, like there was a bit more, quote, balance, if you can say that because business was still going well, I was travelling, I was spending time here and there. But again, like my fitness was not so much at priority because I was in airports, I was on a bike, I wasn't able to get to gyms, I wasn't able to eat how I normally eat, like, always, something's got to give, and I'm
okay with that. What I choose, and this is the part that I want to get to that I think is really, really helpful for people who are like, what is balanced? How do I get balanced? And sometimes what where I see things really become a bit of an issue is where they there's an intentional period of growth, but everything falls away. It's like, all of a sudden, you've gotten your sleep routines
whacked. You're not prioritising your exercise, you're not prioritising the basic things that are going to help you
through a period of growth. And that's why even if I've gone, I'm going through an intentional unbalanced phase or season, I have non negotiables that are my minimum requirement for any phase in any season, like so it doesn't matter if I am intentionally going through a period of say, for example, business growth, if like this year, this is a very good example, this year, I am going through an intentional phase of
business growth. And that means I am learning a lot at the moment I'm investing into mentorships. I'm spending a lot of time with my brain and my energy directed there. I've got so much going on and that I no means I can't say yes to all the social events going on. I've said no to a few more things intentionally. I'm very, very specific about where I'm spending my energy and attention. Because it needs to be on point. Right? So for example, like that's an example.
What that doesn't mean is that by the end of this year, I will have not done a single bit of exercise. My friendships will all be gone. I haven't spent any time with Paul and everything else has gone in pursuit of this growth phase. No effing way, because I have got minimum accepted standards. And that is even like that is my minimum. And that is how I've been able to still like yes, I accept that. Sometimes I may not be my feeder, sometimes I may not be
socialising as much. Sometimes I might not be learning as much because I'm in an execution phase. It's always intentional. It's always coming from a place of self awareness. However, no matter what minimum standards and for me and this is again, please know that this is not prescriptive, it never will be prescriptive. I don't know what phase you are in I don't know your whole environment. I don't know your relationship. I don't
know. But this is my what I do so that you can maybe see what might work for you based on the season you're in your goals and all of that. For me my basic standard NO MATTER WHAT IS THAT A I go to bed before nine o'clock every single night and I prioritise getting a good night's sleep. I do not have my phone in my room any night ever. You will never find me with my phone in my room. That's just not on I have a sound I have an
alarm. That is like it's very awesome but it's like you know blue light and it slowly mimics the sunrise and the sunset and it has really beautiful noises of birds waking up as my alarm it sprays essential oils like all of that. I like to make sure that no matter what I'm prioritising really good quality sleep. I wake up every single morning no matter what and you will see that there is a litre bottle of water next to my bed. No matter what I scull a litre of water before I've even gotten
dressed. I make my bed and I get into my gym clothes no matter what, like no matter what. I'm never gonna just not do those things because I'm in a hustle phase. I'm never gonna go Okay, it's time to grow laptop comes to bed phone comes to bed. I'm not sleeping because I walk. Wait, I was smaller. I was working till 2am No, not
happening ever. There is just even when I was like, when I was a teacher I was I remember thinking that I had a lot of colleagues and friends who were teachers who were just like, Oh, my God, I was up last night till midnight marking and I was like, Absolutely not. No, that is a boundary that I will never cross no matter what. I don't care if it's report time. I don't care if we've got parent teacher
interviews tomorrow. I don't care if we've got exams tomorrow, I will not be up you will never see me up till 12 or 1am doing work. No, thank you. That is just a minimum standard for me. And I'm also very well like if you're out there. If you're listening and you're a mom and you've got kids that are waiting through the night do not listen to me. Like don't take that on board. Of course, this is where it's like have the discernment obviously, to know what season you're in this phase
of my life. Never will I like impact my sleep ever, like very, very rarely unless you know it's a friend's hands party or something like that, you know? So I'm always going to have my water bottle I'm going to have my bed made and I'm going to be in bed without my phone as a bare minimum. I'm always going to have a step count. I'm always going to be looking at my watch and going brown. Like no no,
this isn't good enough. At the end of the day, like for example and this is where I'll say like you give yourself permission of course sometime I was like, if I'm sick, I'm not going to hold myself to these impossible things of what you were meant to go to the gym today's like, No.
And yesterday was an example of this, I always have a 10,000 step date, like, doesn't matter what's happening, especially because I have a sedentary job, which a lot of you that are listening may too, I have a sedentary job where I'm at my laptop quite a bit. I will never ever let myself get to the end of the day where it's 2000 steps and I go to bed, I will go for a walk 10,000 steps is the minimum. And that's just my and that's just what feels good.
Yesterday, I didn't get the opportunity because I was on Zoom calls, I was with my book coach. And then I had to then I got to go straight to a party at my friend's house. And it was just not much walking, I got home, it was dark, I wasn't going to go for a walk in the dark, because I'm not going to impact my sleep and my nighttime routine, right. So that means today I'm making up for the steps like give or take, I make up for it. Because it's my energetic minimum. It's my
boundary. It's my minimum standard. Always, even though I'm in a growth phase, there's just standards that I won't drop. There's other standards that I won't drop, like most important thing to me is my quality time with Paul, Paul. And I will never bring our phones into the into the lounge room with us at night. We just don't there's phone, phone downtime, when we're eating dinner, that is our sacred time.
I love talking to Paul, I would never want him to feel like I was too busy on my phone doing growth stuff. Not to say that if there was a tiny like one or one day here or there, like I said, there's gonna be times where it's like, I'm so sorry, I've got a cold tonight, it never happens. And this is why Allah Allah, He will never hold that
against me. But as Jen, like, there's just no way you don't bring phones in past 6pm We're watching, we're either watching something together, or we're eating dinner together, or we're cooking to debt together. And that's just a minimum, I won't accept anything less. And we'll we'll call each other out on that we will call each other out on that. So there's a few things that like because for me, my energy is so important. My mental clarity is so important.
I want to show up to be the best version of myself for my clients. I need my brain to be on when I'm being creative. And I I really do just like I need my energy management to be on point. And that means there's just certain minimums that just I won't let go of. Sometimes I won't be up journaling and doing meditations and all of that if I'm in a growth zone, because I just like I said, I honour what season I'm in. And I know what I need at any given moment. But there's still just standards
that I'll never drop. Another thing is around food. Like you just won't see me ever drinking sugary shit. Like I just don't really like not to say that I'm you know, and this is not to say that I'm like, I sugar is bad, blah, blah, blah. But you won't see me like, I don't know smashing a coke or a Fanta before a client call or anything like that. Because it's just like, I wouldn't do that. It's just a sugar dump and a high that I'm not going to do I won't do it. And so it's just about
like, what am I minimums? What am I absolute non negotiables that sustain me through any period. And maybe it means five minutes to yourself every single day no matter what maybe it means 10,000 steps, maybe it means I make my bed every day. Maybe it means like little things like I brush my teeth twice a day, no matter what I make my bed no matter what no matter what I go for a walk no matter what, I go to the gym minimum four times a week, like that's just the way it is at
every phase. It helps me to maintain a sense of energy and I don't get burnout. And I make sure that I'm honouring the things that are really important to me because I would not feel good. And the growth would never be worth it to me, if at the end of it. I had no relationship and quality time with Paul, my health was shot like to me health is above all things like health and energy is number one. And my relationships, of course, are super important. So I prioritise those, even when I'm
in a phase of growth. And then it's important to also know like, and this is I've mentioned this before on the podcast, because it is so important. There's so many high achievers and type A personalities that are listening to this. And a lot of my clients are real, like
high performers. And one of the things that I often have to repeat to them and to remind them of is like, hold on, when's the time to reassess what season you're in, because we've been hustling or like, you know, hustlers got a bad name, but we've been intentionally growing and focusing your energy and attention for a while. When is the time for you to kick back? When is the time for you to sit in the season of enjoying it?
When is the season to bring a little bit more quote balanced back in with intentionality? Because otherwise there's no sustainability. And the other thing I'll say about these minimum requirements, like the non negotiables is that that is what creates sustainability. Like I don't I've never actually experienced like this burnout feeling in business ever because I've always had these energetic minimums and these boundaries.
And if if I've seen this, I've got clients who come to me, and they've come to me when it has burnt the fuck out and I'm like, Okay, what are your minimum standards? And they're like, what? I don't have them like I haven't been to the gym. I haven't prioritised, they literally will go I haven't prioritised and it's like what are you? They must think like Brianna I've come to you for business and mindset support. What are you thinking? And I'm like, where's your exercise? Where's your
water? Like? Seriously, though, because of course, you're feeling burnt out, what have you done for your sustainability? What are you doing for your energy management, like, if you want this stuff to be long term, you've got to start thinking about how you're going to sustain it, like how you're going to sustain it, really. And so this is just to say, really, like, there is nothing wrong with you, if you are struggling with this, quote, balance.
Because you probably adjust. If you really looked at the season, you're in and you're honest with yourself, ask yourself, What's the season? Am I in the motherhood season? Like, that's another thing, Paul, and I talk about this all the time. And I'm like, I'm not like both of us.
We're setting ourselves up to hopefully one day if we're blessed, and you know, if we're blessed to have that, that's a that's a period that we're like setting ourselves up for where I don't have to be like, Oh, why can't Why can't I be in my business and with my friends and at the gym and trying to be a mom and trying to be all the things like no, I want to be in that motherhood phase and giving myself like giving myself the permission slip to let other things go without any feeling
bad or feeling like I've got no balance and making me a bad person. And in saying that, Paul, and I've also had a conversation of like, what my minimum requirements are for me to feel like I can be the best version of myself. And those
things. Like I said, I want postpartum meal deliveries, I want to see like, there's there's certain things that are just like, No, these will be my new energetic standards, these will be my new like, I want a trainer, I want someone that specialises in like women's physio, when I returned to the gym, and I want postpartum meal delivery, because I won't compromise my health, pretty much at any phase of my life. And again, I have had my party phase that was the season of life where my health was
probably not that great. It was a phase, it was my 20s. I was just in that season of life. And so it's all about knowing where you're at giving yourself permission to let the balance tip the scales a little bit. If you're taking a big piece of the gate, you won't have enough cake, you won't have the same amount of cake tomorrow, like it's the same with your energy. If you're putting all your energy into that bucket, you can't give as much to your other
bucket. And that's okay, honour it and give yourself seasons where you might bring a little bit back into it before you go into another phase of growth, and then the balance tips again. Or it might be you know, you're in a phase where your kids really need you at the moment or maybe the business is just chugging along. And you're okay
with that. I think having intentional seasons is just so important not only for your sanity, your peace of mind and to stop that self deprecating, like, why can't I be all things What is wrong with me, I feel like I'm a failure that stops you comparing, because you just know what you're doing. You know what lane you're in, you can put your blinkers on, do your own thing, honour that and communicate it with all the
people in your life. So that, you know, whatever phase you're in, you're never gonna look back and be like, Oops, totally, like, totally put all the other buckets in the bin. And now I have to pick them all up. You won't need to if you're going through an intentional season, you know what that's going to look like you're able to communicate it and you're not going to make yourself wrong or bad or ashamed. Because you're not, quote balanced and you're not Wonderwoman that's able to
do it all. We can't do it all at all times. And if we know what we're doing with intention, everything gets a lot easier. So that is my two cents on balance. I would love to hear your opinions. I'd love to hear if this landed I'd love to hear if you've got a different like, take on it or perspective. I love hearing that too. So please let me know take a screenshot DM me, I would love to hear from
you. That is all for me this week, have a beautiful season, whatever season you're in, I hope you're having a beautiful time in it. Hopefully this will help walk away thinking about what are my minimum standards standards that I will never let drop for my own energy sustainability and management, what are my standards? And how can you make steps and implementations for that? Like I said, I have some standards, which means I go to bed at a
certain time. I have an alarm clock that helps me with those things like if you do decide on some new minimums, ask yourself the next question of like, what do I need to put in place to make sure that these minimums are always met, always going to be checked and that I can really be the best version of myself in any season of life. So have a beautiful week and I will see you here on next week's episode. Bye