🤷 Are you doing "personal development" or distraction? Why you're not growing 🌱

exciting. And next week, oh my God isn't next week next week, we are off to Europe again, myself and my husband were finally going off on our honeymoon, which is cycling across Europe and spending a whole bunch of time in mostly France, which I'm so excited about. I am just so keen to be on those pathways again and building my booty. Last time I got back from the last trip, I think we did about four or 5000, K's. And I couldn't fit into anything because my bag got so

juicy. So I'm looking forward to that I'm looking forward to the food and the culture and just being with Paul and spending a lot of time being present. And there's honestly like, just as a quick update, I'm just so excited because in preparation for going away, I have been spending a lot of time in a bit

of a creative hole. And I say hole in a good way in my creative cave, redesigning and refining level up, which makes me so excited because I'm so excited to basically share new lessons, perspectives and teachings from a place of evolution. Like I have grown so much in the past since I've

actually run it last time. But also observing, I get I get messages and testimonials almost every week from clients who have done it one year ago, two years ago, three years ago, and who are still reaping the benefits. And I'm so observant in this in asking myself. Okay, what was it that has created the lasting results for these people? And how can I leverage that and bring that in more so I can get even better results for clients.

And I'm just in this really fun space of like, making it better and making it more impactful, making it more transformational and I can't wait, I just get so excited to think about the people I haven't even met yet that get to transform their lives from the inside out. And it just gets me so excited. Because every time I get ready for a new like, this is my dream honestly sitting here, I'm in my

Rugrats pyjamas. It's a Tuesday, I spent the morning with my mom and dad because I could, and I'm getting ready to go off to Europe again. And business is doing really well. And my marriage is amazing. And like I'm living a life that is quite honestly unrecognisable to three years ago. And I know that everybody can. And that's why I get like, I want to scream this

stuff from the rooftops. Because I know through observing hundreds of people who have done it and who have followed the sort of formula or structure that I teach. And through my own embodiment of this work, I know what's possible. And that's why I just get so lit up. So fired up. I feel like every round, I'm even more convicted because I have more evidence hundreds of people and have hundreds of people that still message me and say like how it's still impacting them. So it just gets

so exciting for me. And it's always this really beautiful reminder, you know, when I'm off, to explore Europe and to ride around, like that was my dream life. I just wanted to cycle around the world with my husband, and help people to do whatever they needed to do to create their dream and to be a better version of themselves along the way and to feel happy and satisfied and present and to just build a life with no

regrets. Honestly, I feel like there's going to be a podcast episode about this because I had a reflection just recently when I was doing a lot of the level up refining. And it was like, a lot of this is actually motivated for me, not by life. But by death. Like I'm very much conscious of the fact that everyone's going to die, we're all going to die. And I don't think our western culture spend enough time thinking about that, because death motivates me.

Death makes me like, right, I need to make sure that everything I needed to say was said it makes me want to experience richness and vastness and variance and all the different things that life has that I can only experience once in this particular bag of bones.

Like I want to see things that my eyes will only see once I want to feel things that my body's here to feel I want to taste things like I want to say things that you know, inside of me that I haven't been expressed, and I never ever, ever, ever, ever want myself or anyone I love or any of my clients to get to the end of their life on this planet and go shit. I didn't do the things

that I wanted to do. I didn't say the things I wanted to say I didn't experience all the things that I know I could experience because I didn't believe I could or I was scared or anything like that. Like it just motivates me so much. And so this is always just such a beautiful like, Oh, I'm off to Europe and I'm experiencing new things and I'm doing it the way I wanted to do it and I get to teach this to other people now so it just excites me so much and that

feels really really good. And on that so I want to dive into this is all kind of It all relates. But I want to dive into today's episode, which is largely about how having a vision for your life and a direction and a goal and having an image in your mind of what you're aiming for how you want to feel what you want your life to look like, what you want your business to look like. Having that in your mind, and then actively pursuing and becoming that version of yourself every single day with

every waking decision. It's like aligning your decisions, your thought processes, your beliefs, aligning that with Who do I want to be, and where am I going, what that actually does, is gives you an external thing to aim towards, which then can serve as the mirror to show you what needs to be worked on

internally to get there. So what I see happening in the personal development space is that people want to go backwards and be like, I need to find, I need to find my block, I need to find the thing that's blocking me I need to go and like they go on this like investigative journey of like going back through the trenches back through their childhood back to finding the block, and they want to go backwards. And that is actually

not necessary. Because when you move forward with a vision and a goal in mind, that is outside of your current reality, you can bet your bottom dollar, the stuff that needs to come up along the way is going to come up. Because when you've got a vision or a goal, and you need to be someone different, like you need to become and it's not just saying you need to become a whole new human, like, I have a lot to say on this, but I have become a new human in so many ways in the last three to four

years. And I'm still exactly the fucking same, like it's both. But you are going to have to think differently, act differently, create something differently in order to create this different result, whether that's a dream, a new life, whether that's a new business, adventure, or whatever it is, something is going to have to be different. And when you need to do something different stuff is

going to come up. But how you create huge transformations and big fast results and become a better fucking human along the way is that you have that vision in mind, you strive towards it. And you let the things come up that reflect back to you where you need to do the internal work because it will come up, you don't need to search for it, it

comes up. And so my business, I'm going to give examples of business because it's very good for context and just to give examples, but I want you to apply this to how you can use if you're striving towards something. And then things are coming up. It might be oh, there's a relationship issue here. Or it might be that there's a conflict at work. Or it might be that you're feeling yourself really resisting some something you know you need to

do in your business. If you can look at that from the lens of and this is going to be the question I want you to reflect on for all of today. And for the rest of you know this podcast, I want you to be thinking about this. How is this serving me a mirror, and an opportunity for the internal work that needs to be done because that is where the work lies. And that is the internal work that you need to do that is going to shift and move your external results very

fucking fast. What most people are doing is obsessing on external things. Where's the perfect strategy? How many posts do I need to do? How do I write a perfect caption? What is the perfect launch plan? What like whatever it is, people are obsessing on all of these external things and not letting their the way that they are responding and their internal world be a mirror for like, Oh, I've got a bit of work

to do here. So let me explain how this actually occurs to me and why I believe my business is a portal for my growth and why in the last three years, I have become so much more resilient, so much more consistent, so much more self aware, so much more self honest, a better communicator, a better leader, because every time I'm striving towards something and something comes up, I don't obsess on how I can control the external factors I obsess on what is this here to show me in my internal

world. So let me give some examples. In my first year of business, what I noticed coming up was a whole lot of resistance around showing up and sharing my message and sharing even just sharing to, for example, at that time colleagues that I was doing business was absolutely

petrifying. And rather than figuring out how I can, you know, control my colleagues perceptions of me or rather, rather than obsessing on like, all of these external things, what I was doing was going well, this is a mirror and it's here to show me that the work for me to do is actually on my fear of

judgement. I clearly still had a lot of fear of judgement that was holding me back and that was the work to do because once I had transcended that all Have a sudden the issue was not content because they see how that could have happened back then I could have said to my business coach or mentor, I'm finding it really hard to do content. I don't know what to say, I feel like there's a blog, I'm not being

consistent. Why can't I be consistent with social media, where's the next best strategy, I need to find a different course on content creation. But actually, underneath it was the real problem. The real issue was, I was petrified of judgement. And when I transcended that, and when I did my work, their contents never been an issue for me what a lie that would have been, I love content, I love creativity, I've got ideas coming out my backside, I can't keep up with

my own stuff. And so can you see how it could be very easy and very distracting to go chasing all these other like, quote, solutions to the problem, when actually the mirror that was being held up was like, woof, you're really afraid of people's judgement, that's the work to be done. And I see this in every stage of people's business, there'll be like, Oh, my launch isn't going right my launch, I need to I need a candidate, or I

need to, like change it. Or they'll or they'll do a really great launch, and then be like, Yeah, but already on to the next thing. And the issue is not the launch, the issue is not finding the next shiny object. The issue is, this is a mirror for how nothing's ever good enough for you. This is a mirror for how even when you were doing really well, you focused on what didn't go, well. This is a mirror for how fucking hard you are on

yourself all the time. This is a mirror for how even though you've got three or four clients that can't wait to work with you, it's not enough for you, because you're focusing on the

not enoughness. And so what we can do with our goals, our dreams, our business ventures, whatever it is, is let things come up that actually show you what you need to work on in your mindset, in your beliefs in the way you speak to yourself, because what I've seen time and time and time and time and time again, is that that is really the work to be done. And what people will say is like, this is the problem, the business is the problem, the strategy is the problem, this person is the

problem. But all of that if you really, really took on some radical self responsibility. And that's where it actually becomes quite, you've got to be brave, you've got to be willing to put your hand up and be like, Oh, wow, I'm the problem. Like, it's me, I am hard on myself, I am never present. And so I distract myself or I'm petrified of people's opinions. So I'm spinning my wheels around, or I don't know how to sit still. So I'm busy in my business all the time. And I love saying I'm

overwhelmed. Because that distracts me from what I actually need to do. It takes a lot of radical responsibility and self reflection and self awareness to be the person who can go, actually, you know what, I've just got some work to do here. And this business or this goal has been a beautiful opportunity for me to really see

myself. And that's why I believe my business has grown every single year, not because I found this new golden strategy, not because I found this new like, I don't know, nothing has really changed. Except that I'm working every single time something comes up. I'm like, oh, okay, new level of self awareness. And guys, it feels gnarly. Like, sometimes it feels gnarly for me to be going like back in the first year, I was like, Whoa, nothing's ever good enough for me. And that was something it

was a hard pill to swallow. It was a hard pill. I sold out my first few launches. And everyone was celebrating me in my business business container. And I was like, Yeah, already on to the next thing. Do you know what I mean? And that was a mirror in my very first year for oh, wow, I am not continuing with that. Because nothing will ever feel good enough if I don't work on that thing. And then what

happened? When I started working on that my business felt really fucking good no matter what was going on, because I learned how to be a person who focused on what was right in front of me, who focused on the gratitude for the present moment who thought everything was a bonus and was so happy and honoured and grateful for what was exactly in front of me, not what was missing. And So had I not seen

that part of myself. I would be sitting here right now with my business doing really fucking well we for external this last financial year, we've hit over half a million dollars. I would be sitting here going yeah. Why didn't I hit a million? And you know what I mean? That would feel shit business wouldn't feel good. So why would I keep showing up? Why would I keep growing if I'm making it not

feel good. And the reason it keeps growing is not because I keep going out, getting myself distracted in all of these new things, new programmes, new strategies, not to say that they're not important as well.

But I think a lot of growth happens when we let our endeavours our goals, our business ventures whatever it is serve us and it will happen you don't need to go looking for the block you don't need to go looking for the trauma, you don't need to go looking for the things that you need to heal, they're going to come up in pursuit of these things. Have you ever wondered why sometimes you set this huge, big goal? And then all of a sudden you go

backwards? All of a sudden, you're like, actually, nevermind, I'll go backwards. It's because there's things that are coming up for you to address and you don't want to. And that in itself is a mirror. Where are you being avoidant? And going? Actually, nevermind. How is that a mirror for how easily you give up on yourself? How is your business or your family or your relationships, a mirror for how you're actually too quick to put

everyone else's needs first. And now you're resenting yourself because you've got no energy, and you're resenting everyone else. But actually, it's all a mirror for the work that you need to do to become a better person and to create your dreams. Like the work of creating your dream life is that it is work. It's not sunshine,

and rainbows and lollipops. And I never stopped doing this I honestly can't like, and there's a few episodes, I feel that will be coming over the next few months, because I have been going so fucking deep with myself in the last six months. And it doesn't feel good. It feels really fucking gnarly a lot of the time. And it's because I set these big goals and then stuff comes up. And what do I do? I go, Okay, what is this here to show me? What is

this reflecting back to me? How is this a mirror for how I need to be more honest with myself? How is this a mirror for how I might still be doing this little shady thing that I need to clean up? And what it's not about is shaming myself and making myself wrong or making myself a bad person. It's about the fact that oh, okay, I've seen something this is exciting. How can I transcend this? How can I work to evolve this? How can I make a new choice. That is why I have been creating my

dream life. Not because I've been like, oh, it's all gonna be sunshine and rainbows. But because I've been leaning in when I want to lean out. And I think if if we all set a big goal and set a big dream, and then actively went about our day, aligning our actions, our thoughts, our behaviours, our words, aligning it all with where we're going, you can bet you that things are gonna come

up. And if you can be the person that looks at those things, and goes, What is this here to show me about the internal work that I need to do, what you'll find is that you'll create your dream, you'll create your dream business, you'll create your results, and transform, and transcend those actual things that need to be worked on. And you'll you'll create it much faster, because you won't be doing the dance of distraction. And that is what a lot of my clients are actually working on

when they come to me. And this is what I want to say, actually, I should really I keep forgetting the business bar, which is my mastermind for business owners who want to do this work and stop distracting themselves and come back to actually what do I really fucking want, like clear the slate and be like, What do I want? Where am I aiming towards?

Why? What do I want my life to sound like and feel like in my relationships and my relationship with myself, and how is my business going to be a beautiful portal to create this and to mirror back to me the work that needs to be done. That's what the business bar is all about, I forgot to say and it's open right now all of the information will be in the show notes, it's half, I think it's almost half full, I'm only

taking eight to 10 humans. So if this is the work that you're really interested in, and you're interested in growing your business from a place of actually doing the work required, not keeping yourself busy and distraction, then it's absolutely the place for you.

But the point of this is to say a you don't need to go finding your triggers in your traumas and your blocks, it's going to come to you when you strive towards something that is outside of your current reach and be that thing that you're striving towards is going to feel so much it's going to happen so much faster. When you take some radical self responsibility, and you let everything that comes up be an opportunity for you to reflect to reflect deeper on war. How am I responding to myself right

now? How am I responding in my mind? How am I speaking to myself? What am I resisting here. And if you can let that be the actual work that you do, and it's not always going to feel nice. Sometimes it's going to feel gnarly. Sometimes there will be some healing that you need to do to transcend things. Sometimes you will need to uncover the things that have created the block sometimes you are need to go into have to be really brave and go into the

cave that you fear the most. But that's where the treasure is. That's where the treasure is. And what I will say is that designing my dream life and again, it doesn't stop I keep doing the work. You don't just get there and go cool. Done. Now, although there's a season for really reaping the reaping the rewards that you've sown, is that how it goes? Sewing what

you've reaped? I don't know. Got it bolted up, I'm sure but there is a season for sitting and sitting in it and just sitting in gratitude and maybe you don't want to be in a growth zone. But then eventually you will because Humans are for natural humans want evolution, we want growth, we are always for evolution. And you'll go through a season of

wanting it. And when you go through the season of wanting it, what is required of you is to be brave and self aware and responsible and see the parts of yourself that you get to shift internally, that is going to then create new outcomes on the external. So I hope this has been a helpful little pep talk

today. The the real takeaway here is that you have got everything you need, if you can be self aware and watch your own patterns, responses and internal dialogue, to then go to the root root cause do the internal work. And that in itself is going to help you to create anything you want externally. But it's actually the internal work that needs to shift. And if you let the external be a mirror, everything moves much faster.

And I can say this with so much conviction, because I've watched hundreds of people do it inside of level up, I do it every single day in my life. And I know that that's the work to be done. So please don't distract yourself with all of these fanciful things on the outside that are actually not helping

you to move forward. So what you need is a vision, what you need is somewhere to go and what you need is a fuck tonne of self responsibility and self awareness to watch where you are not being in integrity with where it is you want to go. So two things. If you want to build your vision, build your dream if you want a big community and a retreat, and fuck just oh my god, I'm so excited if you want to join us to do this work, and I will be doing this round with

you. In the next round of level up, the waitlist is now officially open. So you can go to the show notes or the link in my bio on my Instagram to get on the waitlist. And there is so many new additions to this that it's going to just oh, so excited. And if you want to be doing this work from a business perspective, to grow your business by growing your human and having a very small knit

group of people to do it. With a retreat with a staycation little getaway to clear everything and just really connect, then the business bar is for you. And you can apply with the link in my show notes. Those are the two ways that you can come into my

world right now. And I'm so fucking excited about where it's going and where we can finish off 2023 Like what the hell we're going into the second half now but let's let's make some magic this year, let's become self aware, self responsible humans who let everything that we're striving towards be a portal to become a better human. Like, what fucking beautiful

work to be done. What a beautiful opportunity to grow your human by having a goal whether it's business or life and striving towards it and being a better human along the way. Like this stuff makes me really excited, obviously. So have a great week guys and I will see you back here next week before I buzz off to Europe. See you next week.