So here's after, gosh, 20000 hours, okay, this is what we believe. Okay? The only difference between people who are thriving financially, who wake up excited and with energy, and have the relationship of their dreams, and those who go broke, stuck, and overwhelmed is one thing. Okay? And it's this. It's an emotionally fit nervous system. An emotionally fit
nervous system. An emotionally fit nervous system balances the healer and the achiever within you, and supports you to manifest your next level without burning out and without repeating the past. Okay? And the world is sort of fragmented right now. Okay? And what I mean by that is we have the sort of trauma, somatic therapy crowd over here, and then we have the kinda coaching performance crowd over here. And it's almost like politics
or something in a way where there's just, like, these sides. And I don't I'm not talking about politics, but as an analogy, we wanna be able to honor our nervous system and our past, but we don't wanna say, who here wants to stay stuck in your past trauma forever? I don't think anybody wants that. Right? But if we don't understand where we came from, well, we know we don't study history, we'll repeat it. And at the same time we wanna be able to
perform. We wanna be able to reach the next level. So what we're all about is understanding context. How do I build an emotionally fit nervous system? Well it depends on the situation because if depending on your capacity, depending on your healing or different area different phases of life, different things are necessary at different times. Okay? But the distinction is an emotionally fit nervous system. Now check this out. Okay?
Why why do you think we are so focused on the nervous system here? I'm curious. What do you what do you think it is specifically about the nervous system? Why do you think we're here talking about your nervous system? Lived experience, yes. Everything starts in nervous system, yes. Yes. Chemical. Holds capacity, okay. Irregulates stress? Okay. Love these answers, y'all. So good. Okay? So check this out. Okay? The reason why we focus on the nervous system is I'm gonna say
something that, might be mind blowing for you. Okay? The nervous system is where trauma happens. The nervous system is where healing happens. And the nervous system is where performance happens. That's where it all happens. And then it spreads, it goes out. But the nervous system is how we experience life. Yes. It's interrelated with the immune system, the endocrine system, all the things. Okay? But trauma happens in the nervous system, healing
happens in the nervous system, and performance happens in the nervous system. And check this out. Who here we've been a leader in this, so I'm so excited to see it. Who here has seen the rise of trauma informed work out there? It's just becoming more and more popular. Who here has seen this? It's becoming more and more known. Okay? Which I think ultimately is a great thing. Okay? But hear me now. Okay? Hear me now. Okay? You cannot be trauma informed if you are not nervous system informed.
Because what gets traumatized primarily in the context of what we're talking about here is your nervous system. So if you do not understand how the nervous system works, you really can't work with trauma. Who follows? This make sense? Okay. Y'all tracking so far? Okay. Making sense? Okay. So to be trauma informed, we first have to be nervous system informed. Because the nervous system is the thing that primarily yes, the fascia, the somatics, the emotions, but all those things are sense
and experience with the nervous system. Okay? Now here's the other thing. You cannot create sustainable high performance and manifesting, and you cannot manifest your dream life without understanding your nervous system. Who follows? This make sense? Okay? So what this means is it makes no sense no sense to try to heal or achieve without understanding how your nervous system works. There's how the nervous system works, and then there's
how your nervous system works. Then we can talk about trauma. Then we can talk about performance. And everything you've ever done, NLP, parts work, internal family systems, coaching of any kind, somatic experiencing, mindset coaching, cognitive behavioral therapy, all of those things, guess what? They are all phenomenon of the what? What? Of the nervous system. Okay? So that's the most important piece. So if you don't understand
this, you're gonna be stuck. And it's important to understand. So being great at healing or being great at achieving or being great at both does not guarantee that you will have an emotionally fit nervous system. I'm gonna say that again. Being great at healing and being great at achieving does not guarantee that you'll have an emotionally fit nervous system. Who here could think of very successful people
who probably don't have emotionally fit nervous systems? Right? Who here could think of people that are stuck in healing who probably don't have emotionally fit nervous systems? Okay? So this is not about which one. Okay? It's like we need emotional fitness. We need nervous system fitness, 1st and foremost. Okay? So I wanna share this visual with you so it kinda grounds it and lands it a little bit more. There are 3 nervous system skill sets needed to have
a successful life, business, and relationship. Okay? We want to have the nervous system healer skill set. Okay? We want to have the nervous system achiever skill set. And we also wanna have an emotionally fit nervous system skill set. We need to have all 3. If you're just stuck in healing or just stuck in achieving or you're kind of going back and forth and we don't know how to bring it all together, okay, then we're going to be stuck. Okay? And if you want more out of life, we need fitness.
Okay? And that's where the trauma stuff the trauma categories pause. Right? They release you. And I think of, like, somatic experiencing and IFS, those different those different trauma healing modalities, like physical therapy. Right? They're gonna help you kind of, like, get back on your feet. But if you wanna get back on the field, if you wanna go to the next level in your life, those modalities can help you have capacity on some level, but they don't do anything about performance.
And the performance side of things basically just says, who cares about your trauma, change your mindset, move it on. Right? And we have to figure out how to have emotional fitness at a nervous system level, and that's a skill set. Okay? Because the truth is people with good healer and achiever skill sets stay stuck because they do not have an emotionally fit nervous system. Do not, confuse busyness with fitness, and do not confuse trauma release with fitness. There's a huge
difference. Think about this. If you ever had ever had a physical injury, right, and you're healing it, would you say that as you're healing your physical injury that you are fit, you have you already have fitness? I wouldn't say that's fitness. I would say you're in a healing phase. Fitness implies performance. It implies action. It implies the ability to navigate and handle stress. The ability to to take a hit without being taken out. Who follows? This make sense
y'all? Does that make any sense? Okay. So what we want is emotional fitness in our nervous system. So when we look at the traits of a nervous system healer skill set, okay, it's like you have a deep awareness of your emotions, your body sensations. You're all about your body. You talk like this. Right? You kinda get like, oh, that feels kinda good. Oh, that's my stomach kinda
you're so somatic. Right? Every the the words but I love the words somatic. It's it's somatic water these days, somatic sunscreen, some just everything's somatic. That's fine. It's great. I love it. It's amazing. Okay. Beautiful. Okay. Alright. Healer skill sets practice self compassion. They prioritize self care. Okay. They're open to exploring and healing past
trauma. Let's go for it. Let's talk about trauma all day. Right? They use mindfulness techniques to stay present and grounded in earthing and stuff like that. They set healthy boundaries to protect their energy. They trust the healing process and allow emotions to flow without judgment. Okay. They seek support when needed. They don't heal by themselves. They tend to be patient with themselves. Okay? I I I sell somatic water. Just come to me. It's $5,000. Okay?
And it'll go right into your somatic body. I'm kidding. I'm just joking. Okay? But when you have a healer nervous system skill set, okay, we use tools like breath work and meditation, somatic practices to regulate the nervous system. All these things are things I do, by the way. Okay? They balance their desire to help others with their own need for rest recovery. So who here feels like you got a lot of these skills down? You're you you you feel it. You kinda got it
going on. You understand somatics. You understand bottom up. You understand the body. All those different things. Right? You're like, I got it. We gotta just understand. I have to protect my energy. And I have to have my sage. And I have to have my palo santo. And I have to have my boundaries. And I have to all these things, I have to really get in alignment with who I really am at a soul level first before I take any action. Wait a minute. Why is
it 9 o'clock at night? I haven't done anything today. Okay? Just care. But I felt myself. Okay? I felt I felt my emotions. I got I know how I felt. Okay? Now the traits of the nervous system achiever skill set. Okay? They say clear, actionable goals as they say focus on those goals. Right? They got their morning routine down. They take consistent action even when they feel uncertain. They're making it happen. Right? They're disciplined. They manage their time effectively. They adapt
quickly when things don't go as planned. When they see, setbacks, it's like nope. Not a setback. It's feedback. This is not failure. Okay. It's feedback. Right? They actively seek out new strategies and resources all the time. They celebrate the small wins. Who here knows someone? You're like, stop celebrating. It's too much. You're too happy too often. I know people like this. These are like the Tigger people. I am like this sometimes. I am 50% Tigger, 50 percent Eeyore. It
kinda depends on the day. Okay? But, like, you know what I'm talking about? Like, they just literally are so excited. I love these people so much. I wish I could celebrate all the small things. Right? I try. I try. I try. But, like, they have this, like, Tigger energy that's just infectious. Right? They're just like, oh my god. You go out of the car. That's amazing. Right? Oh my god. Like, the car is clean today. Like, oh my god. Like,
you woke up today. Oh my god. Like, you had a sip of water today. Like, it may I mean, just who knows people like this. Right? They're always just so excited. I love these people. I wish I could be more like that. Okay? Right? These people tend to maintain a positive outlook on achieving their goals no matter what. Okay? They push through discomfort to reach their full potential, more stoicism. Right? They're results oriented. They measure their progress all the time. They
visualize their success. And the the the the phrase of the achiever is life doesn't happen to me. Life happens for me. And I'm gonna use everything in that context. Who knows people like this? Or who here feels like you resonate with this? I'm curious if you know these people or if you are these people. Because I I am I am this also. I'm curious. Okay? Yes. Is anybody triggered by people like this? You got your bottom up triggers. Like, you got your somatic triggers by the people.
And then are any of the achiever people triggered by the the the healing people? Like, stop it. We gotta change your mindset. Let's go. Be grateful. We gotta move on. Get out of those emotions. Let's make it happen. We gotta go for a run. Right? Who knows what I'm talking about. Right? Okay. I got it. Okay. So what are the skill sets though of someone with an emotionally fit nervous system? Okay. What does that look like? Okay. So let me
show you what I think. Okay? Traits of emotional fitness and nervous system skill set are like this. They know their trauma but refuse to be defined by it. So what I mean by that is it's trauma is not their identity. Okay? There's a time where that happens, but emotional fitness, your trauma is not your identity. Okay? Emotional fitness faces and befriends hard emotions but transforms them into fuel for growth. So we face and befriend grief
or sadness or whatever it might be, but we use it for growth. Right? We don't turn them away. We don't push them aside. They can be with hard things without losing themselves. Right? They don't collapse. They understand that relationships require effort. All relationships require effort from both parties. Okay? They act before they feel ready. They do not wait to feel in alignment. Okay? Because we don't feel alignment. We feel alignment afterwards. Okay? It's like working out. You feel good
after the workout, not before. Okay? And certainly not during. Okay? When you have a emotional fitness skill set, right, you shine without dimming for other people. Right? Very important. They own their desire for wealth and health and happiness without guilt. They're not they're not feeling guilty because they want more out of life. Okay? They believe it's okay to want more. They allow themselves to receive. They have increased receptive capacity to receive good things. Okay?
They welcome abundance in all its forms. They use their past for wisdom, not as a barrier. Okay? Here here hear hear me now. Okay? Once you know you have trauma, once you know you have parts that are stopping you, it's now on you because it's not unconscious. Once you know you have trauma, once you know you have parts, it's now on you because it's no longer unconscious. So we do not wanna use our trauma as an excuse
to not move forward. We can explain it but we don't wanna excuse it specifically because depending on the type of trauma you've had, if you do that, you're gonna let the people who hurt you win by not shining. And we don't want that. Okay? So with emotionally fit, nervous system skill set, we use the past, but it's wisdom, not as an excuse or a barrier. Who follows? Make sense? Okay? They embrace healing and growth.
Okay? And this is huge. Okay? Emotionally fit people in a nervous system level see triggers as chances to learn and grow, not as setbacks to avoid. Okay? People these days are like, I'm triggered. It's like, welcome to planet Earth. You're you will be triggered. And guess what? The research is clear. Trigger warnings don't help. And sometimes it can
make it worse. Okay? I'm gonna give you a trigger warning right now. You're gonna be triggered for the rest of your life about something, and it'll probably change. Okay? There's your trigger warning. Right? We wanna recognize that triggers are an opportunity to grow. They're not something to avoid. In fact, achievement manifesting the next level likely will increase how much trigger you experience. Okay? Who follows? This makes sense? Right? Because you're taking on the unknown.
You're going into uncertainty. You're creating more chaos because I don't know what's gonna happen. You're gonna be more triggered. Right? Another fucking growth opportunity if you want it to be. Exactly. Right? If you want it to be. Okay? Now this is probably the most important piece. The most important skill set of an emotionally fit nervous system is focusing on what's useful. Okay? It's wisely choosing where to direct your energy. Maybe it's the past. There's a time for that. Maybe
it's the present. Maybe it's the future. But we wanna focus on what's useful and what serves your growth and well-being now. So if you're stuck in achiever dominance, it might be useful to understand where that comes from. Where does your trauma come from? If you're stuck in healer dominance, it might be useful to slightly bypass a part of yourself and don't put the most traumatized part of you in charge of your life. Right? That might be useful. So emotional fitness at a nervous system
level focuses on what's useful. And sometimes it's useful to go back, and sometimes it's useful to go forward. And we wanna be able to do all those things, not just one or the other who follows. Does it make sense?